SEAL’S SECOND CHANCE

By Ivy Jordan

This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places and incidents are products of the writer's imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locales or organizations is entirely coincidental.

Copyright © 2017 Ivy Jordan

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Chapter One

Isaac

Take that, wind it back. Lil Jon got the beat to make your booty go clap!

The song replayed in my head over and over again like a damn broken record. My eyes were fixated on the perfect apple-shaped bottom bouncing in front of me. It was obvious she worked out, that she worked out a lot. Damn!

I kept pace with her, only a few feet behind, but I was beginning to show signs of distress that I hoped she wouldn’t turn around to see. One year after retiring from the Navy, this private detective SEAL was tired as hell. I didn’t realize how soft I’d gotten; to look at me, I was in great shape. Fuck.

Time to get serious again, Isaac. Women like this don’t like soft men; they like em’ hard, strong, and ready to serve.

And I wanted her.

Damn, I’d like to serve her any way she wanted.

Thank God, a light. I stopped, resting my hands on my knees, bent over like an old man, not the twenty-seven-year-old ex-Navy SEAL that I was. My chest lifted and fell hard a few times until I caught my breath. I looked up, still hoping she hadn’t turned to watch my disgrace. My eyes lifted to her round ass, bouncing as her legs began to run across the street, giving me the strength to go on.

Suck it up, Isaac; you used to run forty miles in a day. You seriously gonna let this city girl show you up?

A growl rolled out of my throat, pushing past my lips with a tickling vibration. My right foot came off the curb, landing on the street where all the cars seemed content to wait for such a beautiful ass bounce by.

A couple large strides and I was behind her, almost beside her, and then the sound, the awful sound of screeching tires filled the air.

My heart beat hard in my chest, not only from being overworked the last four miles, but from the fear of knowing the thud that followed the screech would be her as I looked up.

Long, beautiful, strawberry-blonde hair spread across the ground, and the beautiful figure that had been my inspiration to get back in shape was lifeless just a few feet from a black Nissan.

A man jumped from the car, a few pedestrians rushed towards her, but I just stood there, frozen, and in disbelief for seconds that felt like an eternity. My feet finally broke free from their spot, and I ran towards her, hoping to see her smile, to say, ‘How silly of me,' or something, anything.

“Someone call for help!” the tall, gray-haired driver from the Nissan screamed.

I knelt down, touching her silky hair, begging her to please get up, to say something, to smile. Nothing.

Someone from the crowd must’ve listened to the man, because red lights filled the street, causing cars to move to the side, creating a path for the ambulance.

This wasn’t happening; this couldn’t be happening.

I stood from her side, glaring at the driver of the Nissan. My blood boiled, and all the training I received rushed through my mind. I knew twenty ways to kill him with my bare hands, and as I contemplated which way would bring him the most suffering, his eyes welled with tears. “I’m so sorry,” he pleaded. “Is this your wife?”

My wife? A police car pulled up from the north block, beating the ambulance driver by a few seconds. My heart pounded hard again, this time with pure panic. My eyes scanned the scene, stopping on a little black wallet and part of a pink phone. I moved away from the man I knew I couldn’t kill with so many witnesses, and quickly scooped up the items, sliding them into my shorts pocket.

The ambulance stopped, unloading two EMT’s who rushed to her side. I watched, hopeful, but scared, as they worked to bring her lifeless body back to life.

“Is she dead?” the gray-haired man sobbed as some stranger put her arm around him, consoling him. Consoling him? What about me?

“Can you tell me what happened?” a strong male voice caused me to turn. It was an officer, young, maybe twenty-two, still with pimples on his freckled cheeks. “Sir, can you tell me what caused the accident?”

“She-we, were running. The traffic was stopped, he ran the red light and slammed into her,” I pointed angrily at the sobbing man.

“You were running together?” the officer inquired.

I nodded, finally feeling the overwhelming pain of possibly losing her hit my gut. She wasn’t moving. If she was dead, it was all my fault. Why didn’t I stop her?

My body took over, lunging me towards the gray-haired man, ready to kill him, witnesses or not. “You fuckin’ dumbass,” I snarled as my fingers clenched around his scrawny neck. I could feel his veins bulging from his loose flesh as I squeezed a little tighter.

Zing! “Fuck!” I growled at the incredible tingle rolling through my spine. Someone fucking tazed me.

Everything went black, and then bright colors danced from the inside of my eyelids. This wasn’t my first time being tazed, so I knew not to fight it, to just fall. Someone caught me, saving my head from bashing into the ground; for that, I was thankful. Whoever it was, wasn’t strong enough to hold me. Their grip loosened, and my body slowly slid to the asphalt.

Commotion was all around me: chatter, sirens, honking horns from commuters with no empathy for the woman lying lifeless in the street. Fuck. They have dinner to get to, shuffleboard tournaments, affairs. Assholes!

“I got a pulse,” I heard a voice not far from me say.

I opened my eyes. Damn, they still burnt like hell. No change. She was still lifeless, but alive.

The nerves in my body began to slowly unravel, allowing me to regain some control. The officer that questioned me earlier extended a hand, helping me to my feet. As I stood, a fucking tazer rested in his holster where his gun would be if he were a real fucking man. Seriously? This little douche-bag tazed me?

“They have her stable. If you want to ride along, I’ll meet you at the hospital,” the officer offered with a weakly apologetic tone.

“Yes,” I blurted, eager to be by her side.

“I’ll get all her information then,” he nudged me towards the EMTs, who were already loading the beautiful, lifeless body into the ambulance.

One of the EMTs stayed in the back of the ambulance, while the other took his position at the driver’s seat. The sirens sounded loudly, and without hesitation, we were off, full blast towards the hospital.

“Your girlfriend?” the EMT asked as he started an IV in her hand.

My eyes glared at the diamond ring on her finger, “Fiancée.”

His eyes saddened, as if to apologize for her condition. She is going to make it. She is going to be fine, right?

“I’m so sorry,” I sobbed, gripping her hand in mine.

They were tiny, and cold, but so beautiful. “What’s her name?”  The EMT asked.

“Maddie,” I blurted before I was able to come up with anything else. I didn’t want them to know her name. I didn’t want anyone to know her name.

The ambulance pulled into the hospital, stopping at a wide set of white doors. Doctor’s rushed to the entrance, holding the doors open wide as the EMT unloaded Maddie from the truck. Her long hair hung over the bed, her eyes remained shut with such relaxation she looked as if she were simply taking a nap. If not for the blood, the dirt, and the scrapes, I could imagine her resting, not struggling to stay alive.

“Female, twenties, jogger hit by a car, vitals are weak, but present, Maddie is her name,” the EMT spouted as he handed her off to the doctors at the door. “This is her fiancé,” he added, looking at me with question.

“Isaac,” I gave him my name, and then he patted my back, smiled, and moved towards the passenger side of the truck.

I followed behind the stretcher that carried her, praying that she’d be okay. “You’ll need to wait here,” a tall,t blonde, female doctor instructed. Her finger pointed to a small waiting room next to a nurses’ station and soda machine. I didn’t want to wait there. I wanted to be by her side.

The female doctor and two others wheeled her away as I stood frozen on the white tiled floor of the emergency room. Nurses quickly followed, pushing carts into a small room, where if I stretched, I could still see inside. “She’s in good hands,” an older woman wearing purple scrubs assured me. Her chunky hand gripped my forearm, pulling me towards the waiting area as the curtain closed.

I sat down in one of the blue leather chairs as instructed by the older nurse. The leather was obviously fake, squeaking as I pushed back into the seat to find comfort. My neck stretched outward, trying to see or hear what was going on in the small room, but not quite far enough.

Nurses and doctors rushed in and out of the curtain Maddie was hidden behind, none with faces that offered reassurance. “Sir,” one of the doctors, a stubby man with no hair and thick eyeglasses, said as he walked towards me. I quickly stood, fearful of the news he planned to deliver.

“You’re the fiancé?” he asked. I nodded. Brace yourself, Isaac. “Are there any family members we can contact?” he questioned.

My chest tightened, and my knees began to buckle beneath me. “No,” I sighed.

“No parents, children?” he questioned.

No, fuckin’ no; just tell me!

“She has swelling on the brain. We’d like to take her to surgery right away, but would need consent if at all possible,” he explained.

Relief fell over me like rain on a hot summer’s day. “Yes. Will that fix her?” I asked.

“There is no guarantee it will. But, if we don’t perform the surgery soon, she will not survive,” he instructed.

I nodded, unable to speak. He pushed a clipboard towards me with a form attached. “Sign here,” he pointed to the authorization. I scribbled my name and then watched as his stubby finger pointed towards the top line on the page. “We just need you to put her full name and birthdate at the top.”

My hand shook as I gripped the pen, slowly lifting it to the space at the top of the page. I ignored the fact that her ID said she was Maddie Stewart, born on December thirtieth, nineteen ninety-two, and wrote down Maddie Grubbs, born November eleventh, nineteen ninety-three. I didn’t want anyone looking for her, or worse, finding her. Especially the one guy that didn’t deserve her. I would keep her safe and make sure she had everything she needed until she woke up.

The scribblings satisfied the doctor enough for him to nod, and then turn back towards the small room. I followed behind him, determined to see her once more. “Sir, you can’t come in here,” the female doctor ordered as soon as she noticed me enter the curtain.

“I want to see her before surgery,” I insisted, not stopping until I reached the side of her bed.

Her body looked so frail, so tiny under the white hospital sheets. They’d stripped her out of her clothes, which they’d bundled up beside her on a small chair covered with plastic.

“It’s a good thing you were with her. She didn’t have any ID on her,” one of the nurses informed me.

I leaned in, brushing Maddie’s strawberry-blonde hair from her forehead and letting my finger graze across the small scar just between her eyebrows. It was a characteristic that most would’ve missed, but not me.

“I love you, Maddie,” I whispered in her ear, and kissed the scar.

“We have to go,” the blonde doctor demanded, pushing the bed away from me as I stood there, tearing up, scared, hopeful, and unsure if I was doing the right thing.

Chapter Two

Maddie

Aches roared through my body as I tried to move. Why can’t I move?

My eyes opened, slower than expected, and as they focused on a white ceiling tile, someone in a blue shirt leaned over me. I screamed, or at least I thought I did, but no noise left my lips. Hair from the v-neck shirt poked out, grazing against my chin as he continued to hover over me.

When he righted himself, standing by my side, his eyes widened with surprise, and a smile spread across his face. Do I know him? Does he know me?

“Glad to see you’re awake. Don’t try to talk. Let your body slowly wake up; it’s been through a lot,” he instructed.

My body has been through a lot? What has it been through?

Another shadow towered over me, a tall man, wearing a nice white dress shirt. His green eyes filled with tears as he pushed his face against my chest. I felt him sobbing as his grip tightened around my aching body. “Ooooh,” I managed to moan, burning my throat as the sound escaped.

The man lifted, apologized, and leaned out of view as the first man reached for something inside my mouth. I struggled not to hurl as he removed what felt like a long tube from down my throat. I coughed, only to feel another strong burning sensation. Where am I?

“You were asleep for a long time, little lady,” the man with the blue shirt spoke.

Nothing about him was familiar, and neither was the room I was in. “How long?” my voice scratched out.

“Since Friday morning when you came in, so three days,” he explained, far too chipper for a kidnapper. I couldn’t remember anything. I couldn’t remember going anywhere, coming here, or either of the men that seemed to know me so well.

“Where,” I paused as the burn took over.

The nicely dressed man with the buzz cut and tearful green eyes leaned in, his chair making a horrid screech on the uncarpeted floor. “You’re in the hospital, Maddie. You were hit by a car when we took our jog,” he explained.

His hand pressed into mine, squeezing it gently as he smiled. My eyes closed, and I felt safe, although I didn’t know why. I believed this man I’d never met, trusted him, but I wasn’t sure why he called me Maddie when my name was…what is my name?

Tears rolled from my eyes, even with them clenched shut. The heat from the salty liquid burnt my cheeks. As quickly as they fell, the man’s warm, comforting hand wiped them away. “It’s gonna be okay, Maddie,” he whispered.

How does he know that? How does he know me?

“Maddie?” a female voice caused me to open my eyes. A tall woman with long blonde hair leaned over me. She wore a white jacket, her name, Dr. Walker, embroidered above the pocket, and a badge with her picture and the same name clipped just below. “Can you tell me your name?” she asked.

My body shook with convulsions as I struggled to remember. I shook my head, allowing more tears to fall onto the stiff white pillow beneath me.

“Can you tell me where you are?” the doctor asked.

“The hospital,” I muttered.

“Very good,” she applauded. “Do you know what year it is?”

I perked up for a moment, ready to spew out the answer to the easy question. Nothing. My mind was blank. I couldn’t remember. “I don’t know,” I cried.

“It’s okay. You had a serious brain injury, and you’ve been asleep for a while. Don’t push yourself too hard; we’ll wait and just let it come back to you,” the doctor smiled sweetly and then flashed a bright light in my eyes.

I followed her instructions, looking up, down, to each side, and then straight ahead. Her hand rested on my wrist as she stared at her watch, and then finally, she left the room.

There was no sign of the man with the blue shirt and hairy chest, only the one dressed so nicely with the green eyes. “You don’t remember anything?” he asked.

“No,” I sighed.

“Nothing at all?” he probed.

I shook my head and then closed my eyes shut tight. Maybe this was a dream, a strange dream. I just wanted to go back to sleep so I could wake up at home, know who I was, and not feel so alone.

I must’ve drifted out because the sounds in the room were soft and unfamiliar as I started to open my eyes once again. Several people, all wearing scrubs, were in the room. I watched, carefully analyzing each face, hoping to remember one of them, but nothing. “Look at you,” a black woman grinned, her hand resting on her hip and her voice heavily carrying an accent.

“Where am I?” I asked, hoping for a new answer from the one I got before.

“In the hospital,” she said, her grin quickly fading from her face. “Do you know your name?” she asked.

I let my eyes close and my mind relax as I tried to come up with an answer. Maddie was the only thing that came to the surface of my lips, but I knew it was only because that man had called me that.

My eyes opened, and I pushed myself up in the bed as I scanned the room. He wasn’t there. My body felt stronger, but not strong enough to get out of bed just yet. “Are you looking for Isaac?” the nurse asked.

The others started clearing the room, offering warm smiles in my direction as they exited. “Who?” I asked.

“Isaac. Your fiancé?” she said cheerfully.

My what?

“He’s been by your side, never leaving since you came in. He must really love you,” the nurse gushed. I didn’t have a fiancé, and if I did, I was certain I’d remember him. “He just left for a cup of coffee,” she added, checking the fluid bag hanging above me, and then stepping out of the room.

I was reeling with the comment that this strange man was somehow my fiancé. My hands pulled to my face, rubbing wildly as I tried to snap out of this nightmare when something snagged my bottom lip. I pulled my hands away, slowly focusing on the large diamond ring wrapped around my ring finger on my left hand. It was true. I am engaged?

Isaac stood in the doorway, staring at me with a strange fear in his otherwise, beautiful green eyes. “We’re engaged?” I asked, suddenly filled with guilt for not remembering this man.

I watched carefully as he stepped into the room. He placed his coffee cup on the table beside my bed, and then took a seat in the chair to my left. “Are you feeling any better?” he asked, totally evading the question I just asked.

“I’m stronger,” I replied, but pushed my eyes to demand an answer to my question.

“Yes,” he said softly, but our eye contact broke quickly. He hated me. Of course he hated me. I didn’t remember him, the man I was pledged to love for life, and I didn’t know who he was. He couldn’t possibly want to marry me now.

“I’m so sorry,” I whispered, reaching for his hand.

He seemed surprised as my hand rested on his. “You have nothing to be sorry about,” he demanded. But, I did. I couldn’t imagine what it must feel like to have the love of your life not recognize you.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t watching you,” he apologized.

“What happened?” I sat up in bed, suddenly eager to learn everything I could.

“We were jogging, like I said. The traffic stopped, and I had to catch my breath. You’re a beast,” he chuckled. I liked the sound of his deep rumble. It wasn’t familiar, but still soothing. “You ran ahead, and I followed a few steps behind. The car came out of nowhere, in the third lane, unseen until it was too late,” he finished.

“Do we jog all the time?” I questioned.

“You more than I,” he smiled.

Something about his smile reminded me of a warm, safe place. Maybe if he kept talking, I’d remember. “Where do we live?” I questioned.

“We have a big house on the beach,” he answered.

“The beach?” I knew it shouldn’t be so shocking to me that I couldn’t remember the beach, or that I lived on one, but it was. “Do we have kids, animals, friends?” I grilled.

He laughed, another sound that was strangely soothing to me, even though not familiar. “No, no, and of course,” he grinned.

I wondered why our friends hadn’t come to visit. What about family? Do I have a family?

A knock on my half-open door pulled me away from my interrogation. A young girl held a large tray in her hand and smiled as she brought it to the small desk that rolled over my bed. “Dinner,” she said without any other explanation and walked away.

My body felt weak, and short, angry grumbles rolled through my belly as I smelled the food. Isaac stood, walking over to the table and unveiling my dinner. It wasn’t nearly as impressive as I’d hoped, but I was starving.  Isaac’s eyes rolled in the direction of the plate. “I’ll have them bring you something else,” he offered, but I didn’t know why. Everything looked delicious.

“No. I’m good with this,” I insisted.

“Oh really?” he giggled.

I nodded, grabbing my fork and scooping out a large piece of the meatloaf from the plate. I pushed it into my mouth, suddenly not as excited to be eating. “Gross,” I gasped as Isaac let out a laugh.

My spoon rolled through the blue Jell-O with the same enthusiasm. The texture immediately turned me off, causing me to spit it from my mouth and into a napkin. “What do I like?” I asked, realizing Isaac knew me better than I knew myself.

“The mashed potatoes,” he smirked.

I didn’t fight him when he offered to get me a new meal, grateful that he knew what I liked. How horrible is this gonna be if I never remember even the smallest of things?

When he returned with a bowl of chili, crackers, and a large coney, the smell immediately brought the grumble back into my belly. I scarfed the food down like I hadn’t eaten in days because, apparently, I hadn’t.

When finished, Isaac scooted towards the bed, letting his strong hand rest on mine. “Tell me about myself. Maybe it’ll trigger something,” I pleaded.

“You need to rest,” he smiled, covering me up with the blanket as he took the empty tray of food from my desk. I didn’t need rest. I needed to know.

Chapter Three

Isaac

I leaned against the door frame, peering into Maddie’s hospital room. She was beautiful. Her delicate fingers worked through her long strawberry-blonde hair, wrapping a holder in place until she had the perfect ponytail.

She was already dressed in the outfit I’d brought her: a bright orange top and pair of white shorts. “You look good,” I said, causing her to turn quickly in my direction. “I didn’t mean to startle you,” I assured.

Her smile was beautiful. It was everything. “They said I could go home,” she sighed, falling back onto the bed. She tucked her hands under her thighs, her bottom lip trembled, and I knew the waterworks were about to start. “I don’t know where home is,” she sobbed.

I moved towards her, slowly, carefully. I didn’t want to come on too strong, but I couldn’t leave her there alone, crying, scared. My arms wrapped around her as I squeezed her tightly and then released for a looser embrace. Her chest lifted and fell as her breathing became labored, and the palm of my hand circled on her back to soothe her fears. “I’ll take care of you,” I promised.

“You’ve been so good to me. I hate that I don’t remember,” she complained, sniffling over my shoulder as she began to regain control of her emotions.

“One day at a time. That’s what the doctors said to do,” I reminded her in my most encouraging voice.

“Knock, knock,” the doctor mimicked his tap on the door as he entered. “It looks like you’re ready to head home,” he said cheerfully.

Maddie’s face turned pale as she stared up at him with her big blue eyes. “Will my memory come back?” she squeaked out, obvious that she was fighting her tears once again.

I knew this had to be terrifying for her, but she was strong. Maddie Stewart was a strong woman.

“I believe there is a very good chance,” the doctor assured her. “With this type of amnesia, it’s rarely permanent. So, you’ll need to put yourself in familiar environments, and like flashes of short films playing in your head, memories will return,” he added.

I felt my gut twist. She wasn’t going to be in familiar surroundings. Her home was in Portland, not Miami, and she didn’t know anyone here. Guilt rolled through my veins like heroin, killing my soul slowly as I began to wonder if I was actually protecting her at all. Am I hurting her by keeping her from her life?

“I’d like to follow up with you in a week,” the doctor stated firmly.

I watched as he moved across the room, his hand reaching for hers. He was kind, concerned, and I feared what was going to happen if she remembered, when she remembered. This man entrusted her to my care, and if he found out that was a mistake, I knew he’d push for prosecution. His dark brown eyes narrowed as his lips widened into a smile. “This process takes time, and it’s different for everyone. Please don’t push yourself; just rest,” he pleaded.

I liked the idea of her not pushing herself. I wasn’t ready for her to remember, and as far as I was concerned, neither was she. This is what she needed: me to help her, protect her, and to rest.

“Thank you,” Maddie sighed, seeming somewhat relieved by the doctor’s words of encouragement.

“I’ll get those discharge papers ready. If you need anything, just call,” the doctor said, turning his attention to me. I extended my hand, shook his, a strong grip, and swallowed hard to rid the lump in my throat.

He walked out, leaving me with Maddie, who was obviously still shaken up. Her hands wrung together like she was squeezing the water from a sponge, and her eyes shifted back and forth in the room, stopping on mine finally. “What if I never remember?” she asked.

“Then I’ll just have to make you fall in love with me all over again,” I chuckled, not exposing the true irony in that statement.

Her sweet pink lips curled into a faint smile as her eyes closed for a brief moment. I wanted to know what she was thinking, but she didn’t offer, so I didn’t ask.

I gathered her items from the room, a few personal things I brought her to make her feel more at home, and a few items I lied about, saying they were her personal items, even though I’d picked them up at the vintage boutique up the street from my house. “You ready?” I asked, trying to stay cheerful and upbeat.

She let out a sigh, stood from the bed, and took the papers the nurse held in her hand. “We just need your signature,” she instructed.

Maddie smiled, took the pen handed to her, and began to sign her name at the bottom of the page. Maddie was quickly scribbled, and ironically it was in her handwriting, but she stopped as she started the last name. “What’s my last name?” she asked.

“Grubbs,” the nurse told her, and my heart sank deep into my chest as I watched Maddie struggle to feel a connection to the name I’d made up.

She placed the pen on the paper, pushing it across to create the name. Her handwriting was different, not familiar, and it was obvious her brain was slow to accept the false name. Shit, she was going to remember, and quickly.

“Let’s get you out of here,” I said, reaching for her small bag of belongings.

The nurse placed her in a wheelchair, even though she insisted she could walk, and I followed behind them as we made our way to the main hospital entrance. “You can go ahead and get the car,” the nurse told me with a smile as the elevator door opened.

I moved ahead of them, somewhat fearful that Maddie would beg her not to let me take her, telling her she didn’t remember me, and to please let her stay.

My car was parked towards the back of the parking lot, so I sprinted towards it to save some time. I didn’t want Maddie waiting, mostly because of the fear she’d have a change of heart before I got her to my house, home.

I pulled my white Escalade to the front doors, lining up the passenger door to where Maddie waited with the nurse. “Is this your car?” Maddie asked.

I nodded, not wanting to get too far into details until I got her home, safe. It was a gas guzzler, and Maddie was an environmentalist. I knew something inside of her told her that; I could see it in her eyes. It was my work truck, sometimes my home away from home when doing a stakeout. As a detective, a private dick as I was often teased, I spent long hours on stakeouts.

“Do you want to listen to some music?” I asked as she climbed into the truck. She nodded, but then looked scared again.

“What kind of music do I like?” she asked.

“Just play with the stereo until you find something you like,” I smiled.

I didn’t know the answer to that question. What does Maddie Stewart like to listen to now?

Her delicate hand reached for the stereo, turning it on. The station was set on rock, the only thing I ever listened to myself. She wrinkled her nose at the song by Imagine Dragons and spun the knob. A country song played; she turned the knob again to one that was more upbeat, like a pop song that the young kids liked to listen to, but she continued to turn. “I don’t like any of this,” she squawked, turned off the stereo, and pushed back to her seat.

Her frustration was obvious, and I felt like an ass for not being able to help. “It will all come back to you,” I smiled, reaching my hand across the console to her lap.

When I pulled into the driveway of my large beach house, Maddie sat up, seemingly excited. “This is where you live?” she asked.

“Yes,” I agreed, and quickly got out of the truck. I walked to her door, opened it, and helped her down.

“Do I live here with you?” she asked.

I swallowed hard, hard enough I knew she could hear the lump in my throat. “No,” I admitted.

“Where do I live?” she asked.

“Portland,” I replied.

She was silent. I didn’t know if the answer just surprised her, or possibly brought back a memory. I walked her inside and sat her on the couch in the day room where she could watch the waves slap at the shore.

“How are we engaged if I live so far away?” she questioned.

“Lots of people have long distance relationships,” I explained, sitting next to her on the couch.

Her eyes tore into me like thorns into my soul. What am I doing? Is this really for her own good, her own safety?

“So, I was here visiting?” she asked.

“Yes,” I replied.

“And, I visit a lot?” she probed.

“Yes,” I lied. “You were going to move here soon; this was going to be your last trip,” I added. That wasn’t exactly a lie. She was thinking about moving here.

“How did we meet?” she asked.

It was obvious my story was creating several holes that left her curious. I knew I had to tell her the truth, at least some of it. “We’ve known each other since we were kids,” I admitted.

She looked shocked, confused, distrusting.

“Here,” I pulled out an old photo album from under the coffee table. I set it in her lap and let her open it slowly. She stared at the images, and her fingers rolled across them as if to try and steal a memory.

“That’s me?” she asked, her finger stopped on an image of a lanky blonde girl with knobby knees and crooked ponytails. “Yes. And that’s me,” I said, pointing to the chubby kid with freckled beside her.

“Does that trigger any memories?” I asked.

She shook her head, tears filling her eyes and the stress of the situation beginning to show through her trembling hands. “You may need some rest. We can look at more pictures tomorrow,” I suggested, sliding the photo album from her lap.

“I am tired,” she sighed. “Where do I sleep?”

The thought of lying next to Maddie all night filled me with excitement, but I knew it would only cause her anxiety. I hoped we would grow closer, eventually getting to that stage, but it was obvious it wasn’t going to be tonight.

“I have a guest room. You can sleep in there if you’re more comfortable,” I offered.

“Thank you,” she smiled warmly in my direction.

It was settled: Maddie would sleep in the guest room until I could win her over.

Chapter Four

Maddie

Everything just seemed off to me. I knew I was suffering from amnesia, and that Isaac continued to tell me it was normal to feel the way I’d been feeling, but I still wasn’t convinced.

I was dressed and ready to go see my doctor for the follow-up appointment, but I needed a moment to collect my thoughts. My eyes scanned the guest room, looking at the small trinkets that Isaac said were mine. They were supposedly so special that I’d brought them with me on this trip, my alleged last trip. If the little brass unicorn was so special, how come I didn’t feel any connection to it? Something about the music box triggered a feeling, but not quite a memory. I picked it up, holding it in the palm of my hand, and turned the old key with my fingers. A melody played, one I knew I recognized, but couldn’t quite get myself to remember. The tune made me sad, anxious, and a little angry.

My clothes were hanging in the closet, just a few. It didn’t look like I packed to stay, more like I’d packed in a rush with no real matching outfits, and only enough to last a few days.

Nothing in the house looked as if it were mine. It looked like a man lived here alone, not like a man who was ready to move in his fiancée. The ring on my finger fit perfectly, and the diamond was large and beautiful. I knew it had to cost quite a bit, so he obviously loved me very much.

Guilt began to spread through my body once again, realizing this must be just as hard for Isaac. What it must be like to have the woman you love, the one who you planned to marry, just completely forget you.

Knock, knock.

“You ready to go? We’re gonna be late,” Isaac called through the thick wooden door.

“I’ll be right out,” I responded.

I took a few more moments to convince myself that this was all normal before I left the safety of my room.

Isaac was in the kitchen, sipping on a cup of coffee. “How are you feeling?” he asked.

“I’m just anxious about the visit,” I admitted. “It’s been over a week since I’ve been here, and almost two since the accident. Shouldn’t I remember something by now?” I pleaded.

Isaac leaned against the counter, his frame solid and tight. It was obvious he spent time on his body, ensuring it was muscular and appealing. He told me I was a yoga instructor, and my own body proved to be very fit, so I didn’t argue, even though it didn’t feel right. I’d been doing yoga every morning for the last week, but it didn’t feel natural.

“This is all normal,” Isaac assured me for the countless time. I knew he had to be sick of my whining, but I couldn’t help it. I wanted desperately to know who I was, who he was, and to remember our life together.

He smiled warmly as he moved towards me. His thick, muscular arms wrapped around me, giving me that sensation of safety once they were tightened around my small frame. There was a strange familiarity that struck me as he held me in his arms, one that I couldn’t quite pull into an actual memory. “Things will get better. I promise,” Isaac whispered in my ear.

I had already left my job, was planning to move here with him to start our life together, and had no family left I really knew and for some reason no friends, so a part of me tried to convince my heart that it didn’t matter if I never remembered. Isaac was all I had, and he was here, his arms holding me, keeping me safe, that’s all that mattered.

He leaned out, loosening his embrace. Damn, his eyes sent shivers down my spine and caused my breasts to tingle. There had to be something between us that was great; my body’s reaction to his touch proved that.

“We better go,” I whispered, pulling away from what I felt was an impending kiss. I wasn’t ready. Even though my body reacted, wanting it, wanting him, I couldn’t. Not yet.

Disappointment filled his eyes, and the guilt I dreaded filled my mind. It’s just a kiss, one simple kiss. He is the man I loved, the one I would marry; what was the big deal?

I shook off the guilt, telling myself that my memory would need to return before I kissed him. He may be my fiancé, but he is still a stranger.

“I’m sorry,” I uttered.

“It’s okay. I understand. No pressure,” Isaac comforted me with a friendly pat on the shoulder. Damn, now it’s like we’re just old pals, roommates, not lovers at all. I knew I was going to have to get ready soon, otherwise I’d end up losing him, the only one I had in the entire world.

I played with the stereo in the Escalade as we drove to the hospital, finally stopping on a classical music station. It made me happy, at ease, and I suddenly felt a connection with myself. “I like classical music,” I announced cheerfully.

Isaac nodded and smirked in my direction. “I was hoping you’d convert to rock,” he laughed.

“So, you knew I like classical music?” I pushed, slightly irritated he didn’t tell me.

“The doctor said not to push anything on you, to allow you to find your own way,” he stated firmly.

Yes, that is what the doctor said. I wasn’t going to let my irritation take away the fact I’d finally found something out about myself. This was a huge breakthrough.

“This thing is destroying the planet,” I sighed, pushing back into the leather seat. Isaac laughed, loudly and with a strange high pitch. “What?” I questioned, beginning to laugh myself.

“You’re gonna be just fine,” he smiled.

He explained that I was always trying to save the earth and everything on it. It was nice to feel as though my identity was returning, even if I didn’t feel a true connection to it.

Walking into the hospital gave me a sensation of comfort. The path we traveled to get back to the fourth floor was the same one I’d traveled to leave it. Everything was familiar, making me feel safe and secure.

Dr. Morris greeted me with a cheerful smile, his dark eyes filled with hope. “I’ve still not remembered anything,” I groaned, realizing I was crushing his hope.

“Nothing?” he asked, his head tilting like that wasn’t normal at all.

“She’s starting to,” Isaac piped in, reminding me about the classical music, and the comment about his gas guzzling truck.

Dr. Morris seemed pleased with those revelations and began questioning me on my daily routine. It was simple, boring, and didn’t feel like mine at all. I explained the situation as Isaac had explained it to me, that I didn’t live here, that I’d given up my career as a yoga instructor, and that I didn’t have anything to trigger my memory. “Maybe you two should take a trip to Portland,” he suggested.

I liked that suggestion. I wanted to be around my belongings and my life. This didn’t sound like it was mine, so how could it ever trigger a memory?

Isaac seemed distraught. “I’ll work on making that happen,” he said, but he didn’t seem too convincing.

Dr. Morris assured me everything was normal at this rate, that it was still early. The accident had left damage to my brain, but nothing that wasn’t repairable with time and avoidance of stress. Stress? Yeah, that’s all I feel anymore; well, that and guilt.

“So, have you thought about trying yoga to jog your memory?” the doctor asked.

“I have, but it just didn’t seem like it was my thing. I struggled with some of the moves, to be honest,” I admitted, feeling as though that was a sign of weakness that my body forgot what it had been trained to do so well before. Maybe I wasn’t that good as an instructor.

“You obviously exercise. Try going to the gym; maybe the environment will help,” the doctor suggested.

I watched Isaac’s eyes shift as he spoke. There was something strange about how he was acting, almost as if he didn’t want me to remember.

“There is a gym not far from Isaac’s house,” I noted, unable to call it my house or ours, because it wasn’t.

“There ya go,” he said with a smile.

Isaac had stayed home from work the first couple days, but for the last few he’d been leaving to go to the office. He was never gone long, but it did give me time to possibly head to the gym and do something on my own. I agreed with the doctor, felt relief that my memory not returning wasn’t a sign of permanent damage, and felt hopeful that I’d get back to Portland to possibly find something familiar.

Chapter Five

Isaac

The rain beat against the back window with a forceful intent as I watched Maddie butter her toast. “No jelly?” I asked.

Her head tilted, as if I asked her something complex, and then a soft sigh escaped her lips. “I don’t think I like jelly,” she said.

I chuckled, shaking my head gently. “Good. Things are starting to work themselves out,” I acknowledged.

The last week, lots of things were becoming clearer to Maddie, and it scared me to death. I didn’t want to lose her, but I knew once she found out the truth, she’d leave, probably hating me for the rest of her life.

“I really wish it would quit raining,” she whined, staring out at the wild ocean. I was glad it was raining, glad that she couldn’t walk to the gym and become more acquainted with her old life. The doctor’s suggestion had triggered something in Maddie, something I knew was from her old life. She loved being in the gym, telling me the smell, the noise, it all made her feel like she belonged. That was the life I wanted her to forget, the one that would only bring her more pain. Her life here, with me, that was the one I wanted to work on, the only one that mattered. I loved her, and soon, she’d love me. I needed more time.

“It should be nice tomorrow,” I smiled, secretly hoping that it would storm for the next three months.

Her hips drew me in as she stretched up to reach the cinnamon from the cabinet’s top shelf. That ass; fuck, it was tight and hard, and I wanted desperately to press my cock up against its warmth. She turned and her cheeks reddened, as if she knew what I was thinking. I suddenly felt a twinge of guilt roll through my veins, and worked to stop the blood flow to my cock before it was too late.

“I’ll just work out here,” she said contently.

Her smile paralyzed me, frozen in its presence. Damn, I loved that smile. I’d loved it from the moment I first saw it.

“I’ll only be at the office for a few hours,” I promised, quickly finishing off the coffee left in my mug.

There was awkwardness between us for a moment, one that screamed sexual tension. My cock twitched against my jeans as I watched her slouch against the counter, the small of her back resting above the drawer. I could just grip that tiny waist, lift her to the counter and settle into her warmth. My mouth watered as I imagined her taste, her flavor, her scent. I want her bad.

“I’ll be fine,” she said, her voice cracking a bit as she spoke.

Was she feeling it too? Did she want me to rush across the kitchen and take her, finally make her mine?

My eyes lingered on her breasts, small and perky. They were pressed up against her tank top, no bra underneath. My lips tingled at the thought of pressing around her tight nipples, sucking, pulling, and teasing with my mouth and tongue. Oh yes, Maddie Stewart was a beautiful woman, sexy, vibrant, and I had to do whatever it took to keep her from harm, even if that meant risking losing her for good.

She turned nervously, rinsing a cup under the faucet. I didn’t want to make her nervous, so I tucked in my lust and mumbled a quick goodbye. It was becoming harder and harder to steer clear of her sexy little body.

I left the house in a slight daze, still lacking the adequate amount of blood to my brain. I jumped into the driver’s seat of the Escalade and started my way to the office. It was close enough to walk, but with the storm, I decided to drive instead. The rain might’ve done me some good, cooled me down from the heat boiling in my crotch.

“Good morning,” Beth greeted me as I entered the office. She was tall, lean, and extremely smart. She was the kind of woman that men dreamt about but feared to approach. “You’ve had a phone ringing in your safe all morning,” she informed as she smiled, obviously waiting for an explanation.

“Shit, I forgot about that,” I gasped, quickly rushing to my office.

Beth was my assistant, a person I told everything to, but I couldn’t explain this, so I didn’t even try.

I opened the safe, pulled out the phone that belonged to Maddie, and closed my door. The phone was damaged to the point I didn’t think it could be salvaged. I’d worked all week, spending every second of my spare time on reading how to repair it, ordering parts, and finally getting it put back together. I’d inserted the battery the night before, placed it in the safe and left. I wasn’t sure if it would ever work again, but right now, I was delighted to see it was.

The phone was blinking, so I opened it, noticing she had several missed calls from Rob Fallon. I opened up her messages and found their conversations. I found where he’d left her several texts over the last couple weeks, and the missed calls were countless. He was desperate to find her, to get her back. I wasn’t going to let that happen. 

He never was going to harm her again. She had told me all about this abusive asshole. I was worried she would go back to him if she couldn’t remember everything he had done to her.

I still couldn’t believe she was wearing the engagement ring she got from him when she arrived in Miami. I thought she had finally ended it.

My heart ached as I scrolled through the texts between Rob and Maddie. She told him she loved him, how happy she was that she found him, and then the tone changed. She told him to leave her alone, that she couldn’t live with his abuse any longer, and that she was starting a new life, somewhere far away. He obviously didn’t get the message clearly, or he was just that pushy, but his pleas for her to talk, to come back, and to give him a second chance were relentless. 

So she had ended it.

This was enough proof to show her he was abusive if she ever thought about going back to him.

I knew he’d given her that ringtone, and I couldn’t fathom why she hadn’t taken it off when she arrived in Miami. Does she still love him?

The phone rang again, startling me. It was him. Fuck!

Beth walked towards my office, and I knew she was ready for an explanation. I didn’t have one. I slid my finger to the ignore button and quieted the phone as she entered my office. “What’s going on?” she asked.

“It’s a friend’s project. She asked me to fix the phone her husband broke when she found it, hoping I could find out what he was using it for,” I lied.

She seemed satisfied. I’d taken on jobs for friends before, ones that she wasn’t a part of, but never ones that I’d kept so secret.

“You’ve been acting a little strange lately. You sure you’re okay?” she asked.

“Oh yeah, I’m great. I’ve just had a lot going on at home, projects I needed to finish,” I rambled.

I knew she wasn’t buying it. She knew me better than that. We worked together every day, sometimes at night, and spending that much time with someone, you learn their behaviors. Mine was off, and she knew it. Soon enough, she’d find out why.

“I’ve gotta head downtown to the courthouse; you play here while I’m gone?” she asked.

“Sure,” I said quickly, finding it a little offensive she felt the need to babysit me.

Beth gave me a look, one that said she knew something was going on, something more than just a friend’s project, and projects around my house.

She finally left, leaving me to deal with the phone that wouldn’t stop ringing. I had it on silent, but it buzzed across my desk as I looked up any dirt I could find on Rob.

Everything I found was flattering, nothing that suggested he was the monster I knew him to be. He was tall with dark features, and a smile that looked like a soap opera star’s. His Facebook page was filled with charity fundraiser events, over a thousand friends, and pictures of him and Maddie. They looked happy. She looked happy.

The phone continued to buzz, bouncing across my antique desk like it was trying to escape. I reached for it as it neared the edge, accidentally sliding to answer. “Maddie, are you there?” a voice spoke through the small receiver.

“Are you okay? Please answer me,” it continued to plead.

I pulled the phone to my ear and took a deep breath. “You need to leave her alone,” I said firmly.

“Who is this? What have you done with Maddie?” the voice demanded.

“Maddie is fine. She doesn’t want to see you again sot lose this number,” I ordered.

“She can tell me that herself,” he argued.

“She already has. I know what you did to her,” I snarled.

“No, you got it all wrong. We were fighting; she turned to leave and fell. I never laid a hand on her,” the man explained.

Likely story. I’d heard plenty of abusers tell the same tale. They were always innocent, and most of the time, they knew their women would return to them, tails tucked between their legs and ready to believe they didn’t mean it, or it would never happen again. Not Maddie. She made her way to Miami, to me, and that’s where she was going to stay.

“Where is she, and who is this?” the man still demanded to know. “We love each other; she would never just leave like this. I’ll find her, and I’ll find you,” the man threatened.

“She never wants to see you again, so move on and quit calling or I’ll have a harassment charge slapped on your ass so fast your head will spin,” I growled, ending the conversation.

There’s no way he’ll ever find her, or me. He’ll give up eventually, even though he threatened not to. I knew his type.

Chapter Six

Maddie

Sweat began to bead on my forehead as my legs twisted in the sheets. I struggled to wake myself from what I hoped was only a nightmare, not a memory. The room I stood in felt familiar, white curtains blowing in the wind from the open window, a tall lamp next to a four-post bed with antique carvings on the headboard, and the music box I had from my suitcase of various items on the nightstand. It was my room. I was certain of it.

Muffled noises blasted into my ears, like someone yelling, angry. I couldn’t make out what they were saying, and when they came into view, I couldn’t make out their face. Who was this, and why were they so angry with me?

Tears fell down my face as I kicked into the sheets I’d tangled around my feet. I couldn’t wake up, and something in my gut told me things were going to get worse if I didn’t, like I knew what would come next, and I didn’t want to know.

Slap, a hand across my face. I dropped to my knees, my hands covering my heated cheek. The man, I was still unable to make out his face, was now on me, his hand around my neck, pulling me back to my feet.

His words were slurred in an angry fury, and his face so blurry it was unrecognizable. Who is this man? Why is he hurting me?

My heart ached as I cried out into the room, trying to pull myself from this dream, this nightmare, this memory. No, this couldn’t be real, there was no way that Isaac would allow this to happen to me.

The hand on my throat was strong, cutting off my air with what felt like no remorse. Suddenly it released, and as I coughed to catch my breath, bam, a fist slammed into my face, pushing me into the wall.

I slid down the wall, staring at the music box on my nightstand. Yes, this was my room; this was a memory.

My body jolted out of the dream as I let out a loud scream. I thought it was only in my dream, but as I snapped back to reality, to alertness, my voice echoed against the walls of Isaac’s guestroom.

The door flung open, startling me. Isaac stood in the doorway, the glow of the hallway light surrounding him like he was an angel. “Are you okay?” he asked, rushing to my side. He sat on the bed, his arms around me, and let me sob against his chest. “You had a bad dream. That’s all,” he assured me. I wasn’t so sure.

“It was so real. I was in my room. I know that was my room, the music box was there.” I rattled off the details of the dream. “What did my room look like in Portland?” I asked, hoping he could reassure me that it was my room, that I did have a memory.

“I don’t know,” he said softly. Why didn’t he know? We were engaged, known each other since grade school, so how did he not know what my bedroom looked like? “You said you redecorated it, and I hadn’t been there since,” he added. “What got you so upset, and why were you screaming?” he questioned.

I took a deep breath and told him about the scary man, the one who was attacking me. “It was so real. I remember feeling such heartbreak that I could barely breathe,” I explained. “Was I attacked?” I queried.

Isaac pulled me close, rubbing my hair with the flat of his hand. “I think your memory is just making things difficult for you. You’ve been so frustrated, and it must be translating to your dreams,” he explained.

Maybe he was right. But, it felt so real.

He started to loosen his embrace, but I quickly tightened mine, refusing to let him go. I felt safe in his arms. It felt natural, familiar somehow. “You want me to stay with you until you fall back asleep?” he offered.

“Yes,” I whispered, and slid from his arms back into the warmth of the blankets.

Isaac slid in next to me, pulling me into his chest. He was warm, strong, and smelled of lavender and musk. The aroma was stirring a strange emotion from deep within my soul. It was familiar. That scent, it was the scent of the man I loved. “I remember your scent,” I whispered, staring up into his deep green eyes. Our lips were so close, they nearly touched as I spoke.

The look in his eyes comforted me, made me yearn for this closeness to never end. I stretched up, letting my lips press against his. He hesitated at first, I could sense his resistance, but I knew he wanted me as badly as I wanted him.

His breath was soft and shallow as his eyes closed and his lips gave into mine. They were soft, sensual, and tasted like vanilla from his nightly bowl of ice cream. Sweet flavors tempted my tongue, causing it to reach out, sliding slowly across his lips until they parted.

Our kiss exploded with a sweet taste, sending excitement between my legs and through my breasts. Isaac’s hands shook a bit as they released our embrace and trailed down my back. They steadied quickly as they pulled me into his warm body. The muscles in his arms flexed against me as his cock—hard, eager, and ready to play—positioned itself against my clit.

The silky pajama shorts I wore were thin, allowing the friction of his cock to massage my clit. My juices dampened my panties, my pussy swelled and began to tingle, and at that moment, I knew I was ready to accept him as my fiancé, my lover.

Our hips rocked together as he settled between my legs. I let out a soft moan as his hands gripped my ass cheeks and pulled me into him harder. His lips pulled from mine. I stretched towards them, still hungry. “Are you sure?” he whispered.

“I am,” I replied, pulling him back into our kiss.

His mouth traveled from mine, searching my neck’s tender flesh. My back arched as his tongue rolled down my shoulder and to my breasts. Small flicks against my nipple through the silk made me cry out, and as his mouth consumed my small breast, sucking it through the silk, my hands gripped at his shorts strands of blond hair on his head.

I was nervous, worried that I wouldn’t remember how to make love, but Isaac took over, leaving me with little to do. His mouth searched to my belly, and then stopped at the hem of my shorts. His eyes gazed into mine with a hunger that drove me wild. I was in no shape to protest what was about to happen; I was ready. So ready.

His fingers slid beneath my shorts, pulling them away from my body as he threw the blankets away. My legs tightened together, nervous that he was seeing me even though I imagined he had many times before.

Isaac smirked, a mischievous grin that made my pussy twitch with delight and anticipation. He kissed my outer thighs, first the left and then the right. A slow growl escaped his lips as his hands parted my legs at the knees. I let them fall open, my pussy still covered with the silky panties he’d left on me. His mouth sucked at the flesh of my inner thigh, slowly moving closer to my hidden flesh. “Oh baby,” he whispered, his hot breath against my dampened panties.

The warmth of his tongue traced the hem of my panties, slowly working into the center where he teased my clit with delicate flicks through the silk. “Can I take these off?” he gasped.

“Yes,” I moaned, lifting my ass from the mattress so he could pull the material away from my body.

Instantly, I felt the cool air of the room blasting against my delicate flesh. I arched my back, pushing my body towards his mouth, anxious to feel the warmth of his tongue on my flesh.

He teased me with slow traces around my clit, slowly sliding into my slit, separating my plump pussy lips so he could taste my sweet nectar. A rumble rolled through his lips as he got the first taste. I lifted towards him, his tongue sliding into my aching cunt.

My eyes tightened as I allowed my body to be overcome with pleasure, enjoying every single tantalizing sensation bestowed upon me. “That feels so good,” I gasped as his mouth sucked around my flesh and his tongue flicked against my clit.

Lightning shot through my veins, and then violent thunder roared from my body as my orgasm reached its point of no return. Isaac didn’t stop, didn’t hesitate, even though my body convulsed and my legs began to tighten around his head.

He sucked my flesh into his mouth as if trying to get every last drop of my sweetness onto his tongue.

Isaac’s eyes were filled with satisfaction as they peered up at me through my open legs. My breathing was wildly sporadic, and I struggled to speak; only moans escaped, no words. “I’ll be right back,” he said sweetly, leaving me on the mattress alone, cold, still wanting more.

I listened to the noises of his footsteps down the hall and the chaotic slamming of dresser drawers. Finally, he returned, his smile wide, and the bulge in his pants powerfully large. Wow!

He bit the small square package, tearing off the wrapper and pulled out a condom. Do we use condoms?

I watched as he peeled off his shirt, exposing rolling muscles and incredible abs. He held the condom in his teeth as he slid out of his sleep pants, unleashing his large cock. My body began to tremble again at the anticipation of feeling him inside of me. Could I handle him? I must be able to; we’re engaged, so surely we’ve fucked before.

“Do we need that?” I asked softly as he slid the condom onto the tip of his cock. He grinned, again with a mischievousness that drove me wild. “You haven’t been taking birth control pills, have you?” he asked with a smirk.

I shook my head. No, I hadn’t seen any in my bag, so no. “Okay,” I gasped, still wondering why I wasn’t on the pill, and if I was, why I didn’t bring them with me.

My eyes followed his fingers as they unrolled the latex over his bulging veins on his cock. He wasted no time mounting me, pinning me to the mattress between his flexed arms. I parted my legs, letting the heavy cock settle at my entrance.

I throbbed against the tip of his cock as he pushed towards me. His weight entrapped me beneath him, and the sensation of being pulled so far apart took my breath away. This felt new, not like something I’d done many times before. He leaned down, kissed me gently on the neck as my eyes tightened, and I bit my bottom lip.

He was inside of me, just barely, and I was already beginning to throb. His dick twitched as my muscles contracted around him, and he pushed harder into me. My hands rolled down his back and to his muscular ass cheeks. They clenched together with each thrust until he made it deep inside of me. We both paused, feeling the pulsations from one another, staring into one another’s eyes, and not saying a word. “Damn,” he exhaled, finally lifting himself from me and leveling for another thrust.

The sensation of his cock filling me brought my orgasm closer and closer to the edge. He growled, then groaned, and then let out a large sigh. My body tingled with every centimeter he moved, and when he plunged back into me, hard, long, and with passionate force, my body lost control, and my orgasm blasted onto him, squirting his balls and wetting my thighs, making his next thrust less labored. My moans grew louder with each stroke as he smacked into my body. The sweet sound of my juices wetting his cock consumed me, and soon growls from his own pleasure took over.

Sweat rolled from his forehead, falling onto my chin as we both opened our eyes and locked them onto one another’s. I wrapped my arms around him tightly, pulling his weight onto my chest. I wasn’t sure how I felt. I knew this was the best sex of my life, but I couldn’t remember any other encounters.

Things were so natural with Isaac; this must’ve been why I fell in love with him in the first place. My heart began to melt a little, and my mind released a feeling that maybe, just maybe, I could have a relationship with this man again, even if I never fully remembered.

Chapter Seven

Isaac

Sex with Maddie was everything I’d imagined it to be, and more. Her body was in fantastic shape, and her muscle control amazing, everywhere. I spent the day after trying to stay close to her, but I kept feeling her pull away. It was Saturday morning now, almost two days since our amazing connection, and I still felt the awkward tension between us.

I had to leave to meet up with one of my SEAL buddies, a monthly breakfast ritual I normally looked forward to, but not today. I hated to leave, to give Maddie even more space, and possibly allow her to grow even further from me.

Her small frame was stretched up to her tippy-toes as she reached for the coffee mug on the top shelf of the cabinet. Damn, that body. I wanted more; I needed more.

“Want some help?” I whispered in her ear, pressed up against her back so she could feel my erection.

“I got it,” she said, turning towards me, letting me trap her against the counter. Her eyes filled with a strange look, similar to what I’d say was fear. Fuck! I don’t want to scare her off, not after we got so close.

Her hand trembled as she gripped the mug, and it was clear my closeness was making her uneasy. I stepped back, smiled, and tried to shake off the rejection with some class. My mind was reeling, wondering if she was remembering more and more. Did she remember who the man in her nightmare was? Did she finally see his face? Did she remember me?

“I’m sorry,” she sighed.

Her beautiful blue eyes widened as they pierced mine. The sun grabbed glimmers of shine in her hair, making it sparkle in the light. She truly was beautiful. She was the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen.

“Don’t be,” I quickly retorted.

Her lips quivered into a faint smile. I wanted to lean in, to hug her, kiss her, but I knew that would only make things worse.

“The other night was amazing,” she proclaimed.

Okay, so why the cold shoulder now?

“Yes, it was,” I admitted.

“I just don’t think I was truly ready for it. I enjoyed it so much, and I needed it at that moment. I felt alone, scared, and in your arms, I felt safe,” she rattled nervously.

“I understand. I don’t mind being used,” I smirked.

“I just don’t want you to think it meant I was ready for us to go back to the way it was, because I still have no idea what it was like,” she sighed.

Guilt rolled over me like a cold shower. My love for Maddie was so strong, and I knew, even so, this was wrong. “I get it,” I replied quickly. Then silence settled between us.

“I have to head out for a little bit,” I explained, hoping she wouldn’t find it offensive. It had nothing to do with her rejection, although getting away for a bit after it, and away from the guilt I felt, it was a relief to be leaving.

“Are you going to be okay?” I asked.

Her face tightened, and I could see the irritation she felt. She’d been trapped in this house for over a week, with no memories, no idea of what to do with herself, and I knew it was making her more than a little frustrated.
“I think I’ll play on the beach,” she said, her voice strangely content.

I smiled, leaned in, kissed her gently on the forehead, and headed out the door. I was happy she was going to spend some time on the beach. I knew it wouldn’t churn up any memories, especially since there wasn’t an ocean close to her Portland address. A sigh of relief fell from my throat I was climbed into my Escalade and headed into town.

Elijah Grant sat in our regular booth inside the small café. The large window allowed me to get a glimpse of him as I pulled into the gravel lot. The place was rundown, old, but the food was pretty good. Elijah said they had the best cup of coffee in the town, and he’d gladly drive a hundred miles to get it. He joked, but he did drive forty to meet me there each month.

His dark hair was still buzzed short, and he wore a tight flannel that showed off his impressive muscles. To look at him, most would think he was a hardass, but in reality, he was the nicest guy I’d ever met.

“Look what the cat dragged in,” Elijah shouted as I entered the diner.

“They’ll let anyone in this place,” I retorted as I slid into the booth seat across from his.

The waitress, the little red-head that served us every month, was quick to reach our table and fill my cup. “How the hell ya been?” Elijah asked.

I smiled forcibly and sipped my coffee before answering. It was hot, burning my lips, but I didn’t care. It was better than answering that question honestly. I needed a moment to make sure I could convince him everything was okay.

“It’s been great,” I choked, shaking my head to kill the burn of the coffee on my lips.

He chuckled. “No patience. That’s your number one flaw still, eh?” he teased.

I knew he was referring to our military days. I was the first one out, the first one to rush in, and always the first one to get reprimanded for not slowing the fuck down. My fast actions saved his ass a couple times, and he knew it. I didn’t mind him teasing me; I actually enjoyed it. He was like an older brother to me. I looked up to Elijah; I respected him.

“I already ordered,” he announced, nodding towards the waitress walking towards us with our plates.

“Good. I’m starving,” I replied. I wasn’t really, but I was eager to get back home, not only to see Maddie, but to see her in a bikini.

Three large eggs, over-easy were situated on a pile of biscuits and gravy. Four slices of thick-cut bacon sat on top in the shape of a star. “Holy shit,” I gasped as I looked at the plate. “What happened to eating healthy?” I laughed.

“Fuck, you only live once,” Elijah laughed, already digging into the gravy with his fork.

Last time we met, he was on a health kick, and he had been for several months before that. I wasn’t sure what changed, but I knew if he wanted to tell me, he would.

“You look good,” he complimented with a wink.

“You too; everything going okay?” I asked, pushing for a reason for the artery-clogging plate of food.

“Nickels died. Massive stroke; he was only thirty-seven,” Elijah said nonchalantly.

I was shocked. My back pushed against the booth and I stared at him for a reaction but gone none. “So, you think eating this shit will work for us?” I half-joked.

“He never ate meat. He worked out every day, and he was in better shape than either of us. Life is too fucking short because there aren’t any guarantees,” he spouted.

I watched him scarf up his food, shoving a bite larger than the last in one after another. “When?” I asked.

“Last week,” he paused.

He was in our team, older than both of us, more experienced, and one that helped lead us. I couldn’t believe it. “Yeah. Life is too fucking short,” I sighed, reaching for my fork.

I listened to him give me details about the funeral and how he left behind his wife and three kids. It was saddening to think he did everything right, but still ended up dead before he even hit forty. It made me think of Maddie. I knew what I was doing was questionable, but life was too short not to go after what I wanted. I knew she was safe with me, safer with me than without. She didn’t have anyone else, no family, and no friends thanks to her abusive ex, so she was better off.

“What’s going on with you?” Elijah asked.

I shrugged. “Nothing.”

“Bullshit,” he boasted.

“Seriously, I’m okay,” I protested.

His eyes narrowed on me, and his lips tightened. I knew he could see right through me. It wasn’t just the Nickles thing; there was more, and he could sniff it out.

I wasn’t ready to discuss Maddie with him, or with anyone, even though I thought he might be the only one to understand.

“You got something on your mind,” he pushed.

I sighed. “I do. But, I’m not ready to talk about it,” I answered with my only acceptable, honest response.

“When you are, you come to me. You know I’m here for you,” he insisted.

I knew he was, but I wasn’t positive if he could help me with my situation. I’d dug a hole pretty deep.

Chapter Eight

Maddie

The beach was beautiful and serene, but even so, it left me feeling empty and alone. The waves washed over my toes, burying my feet in the sand as they pulled back into the ocean, and I struggled to remember something, anything.

I closed my eyes and relaxed in my beach chair, letting the tide wash up around my hips and splash to my belly. The water felt cool and refreshing against the hot Miami sun.

The image of the man who hit me strolled back into my mind, but this time he was kissing me, holding me, telling me he was sorry. Who was this man? I still couldn’t see his face, only a dark shadow of where one should be. His voice was strangely familiar, but I knew it wasn’t Isaac’s. Had I cheated on Isaac with this man?

“Excuse me, miss,” a male voice shook me from my daydream. My eyes opened to a tall elderly man leaning over me, his eyes filled with concern. “The tide is coming up. I was afraid you’d fallen asleep,” he explained his intrusion on my peacefulness.

I quickly got up, pulling my chair from the surf where it was nearly buried. My cheeks burnt with embarrassment at the realization that I’d almost drowned. “Thank you,” I gushed, walking back towards the dry sand.

“I haven’t seen you out here before; you live around here?” he asked.

I pointed to Isaac’s house with a smile. “Isaac Lewis’s place?” he asked, almost untrusting.

“Yes. He’s my fiancé,” I stated firmly, even though I wasn’t sure that I believed it quite yet.

“I wasn’t aware he was engaged,” he said apologetically. “I’m David Martin, your neighbor,” he pointed to the blue house next to Isaac’s and extended his hand to mine for an introduction. The name felt familiar. Rob, Rob; did I know a Rob?

“Maddie Grubbs,” I said, still feeling an odd disconnection with that name. Maddie sounded right, but not Grubbs. “It was nice to meet you. Thanks again,” I said, folding my chair and heading towards the house.

I could feel his eyes on me as I walked through the hot sand. The grains burnt my toes, but I didn’t want to stop to put on my sandals. Why didn’t this man know me if he lived next to us, and why did the name Rob give me butterflies when I heard it?

I stepped up onto the large deck leading to Isaac’s house and turned to see the man watching. I waved and went inside. He obviously didn’t believe that I belonged here. That didn’t feel right. He should’ve seen me around a lot if I visited as much as Isaac said.

I stepped inside, the cool air immediately sending goosebumps to my sun-scorched skin. I started looking around the place, noticing there weren’t any pictures of me and Isaac together, nothing that showed us as a couple, and nothing that seemed familiar to me at all.

I changed into dry clothes and hung my bathing suit over the shower rod to dry. I snuck into Isaac’s room and studied the area, trying desperately to remember something. My mind was blank, the room as strange as the first day I saw it, and no signs of a woman living here, or even staying on a frequent basis.

The plainly decorated large room had gray pillows on a sofa, a leather chair near a mahogany desk, and little else to decorate it. This felt like a cold room, one that didn’t feel familiar to me, or like one that should.

You're being paranoid, Maddie.

I grabbed the remote to the TV, hoping the noise from a show would drown out all the doubts and paranoid ideas streaming through my mind. Dr. Phil was on, talking to a mother of a heroin-addicted teenager. I clicked to a sitcom, then to the news, and then finally landed on a cooking channel. I didn’t know what I liked to watch, and nothing seemed interesting to me.

The woman on the screen rubbed olive oil over the carcass of a chicken and then stuffed cloves of garlic, twigs of thyme, and nearly an entire stick of butter in the opening where it’s guts had been removed. What is that called? Should I know? Did I cook? Do I even know how?

Tears began rolling down my cheeks as I struggled with all my lost memories. I didn’t know who I was anymore, and I feared I’d never find out.

The door opened, and Isaac walked in, immediately rushing to my side. He knelt on his knees in front of me while I worked on trying to calm my sobs. “Baby, what’s wrong?” he asked.

“I don’t know who I am,” I sobbed.

His arms wrapped around me, holding me securely until my crying calmed to a sniffle. I leaned back, pulling from his embrace and stared into his green eyes. They looked honest, trusting, but what did I know? I knew nothing.

“Why doesn’t the neighbor know me?” I asked, feeling a little stronger, and determined to get the answers I needed. “And why is there nothing in this house that looks like I’ve ever been here before: pictures, plants, anything?” I added.

Isaac pulled back, leaving his hands on my knees. His eyes stared into mine, a strong sense of fear oozing from them. My guts twisted in anguish as I waited for his answers.

“I don’t even talk to the neighbors,” he said softly.

“He knew your name,” I spouted.

“Which neighbor?” he asked.

I pointed to the house on the left where David Martin said he lived, and where he said he’d never seen me before. “That’s David Martin. He’s only here in the winter, and I barely speak to the man,” he explained.

I sniffled again, wiping the last tear from my cheek. That made sense, at least to a certain degree. “But, what about the house looking like I had not decorated anything?” I pushed.

Isaac smiled, the corner of his lips curling with a sweetness that made my nipples tingle. “You never asked to decorate before, and all the pictures I have of us are from when we were kids,” he laughed. “You’re a very private person. You never wanted to flaunt our relationship before,” he added.

It didn’t make sense. No one was so private that they didn’t take a picture with their fiancé. “Please tell me about myself,” I pleaded, hoping maybe something he said would trigger a memory.

“Hold on,” he said, getting up and leaving the room.

I sat there, still filled with confusion, and waited until he returned. He held a leather photo album in his hands and then sat down beside me on the couch. “See if any of this jogs a memory,” he offered, handing me the album.

I opened it up, noticing the first picture that he’d shown me when I first got to his house. “You showed me this,” I sniffled.

“Keep looking,” he insisted.

I pushed to the next page and stared at the pictures. “Is that Portland?” I asked, feeling a strange connection to the background. “That school, is that me?”

“Yes. And that’s me,” he smiled, pointing to a cute little blond boy.

My hair was longer, and my face sunburnt across the nose. I giggled at the resemblance after spending the morning on the beach. “Wow,” I gasped, feeling a little better about all my doubts.

There were over a dozen photos of Isaac and myself, but the last one was from our senior year, nothing more recent. He was tall, handsome, and held his arm around me closely. My smile was wide and bright, and it was obvious we were close. “Is this when we started dating?” I asked.

He shook his head. “I’d fallen in love with you long before that, but you had big plans, and I needed you to fulfill them without me weighing you down,” he replied.

My heart swelled at his selflessness. “So, when did we start dating?” I asked.

Isaac told me how he followed me around the playground at school, how he paid a kid a nickel every day to give up his seat on the bus so he could be close to me. It was sweet, but still childish. I was interested in the details that brought us together as a couple, the reason we ended up engaged.

“You finished college and came back to Portland. Your grandmother had raised you, and she was gone. You stayed, but wasn’t happy, so you started coming to visit me. The first trip, we were just friends, and I showed you around town, and the third, I kissed you, telling you how I truly felt,” he said.

“So, how long have we dated?” I asked.

“Not long,” he smiled without giving me any real time frame.

I snuggled into his arms, feeling the comfort and the warmth of his embrace. At that moment I needed to believe every word he said, to not question anything, to just be.

“So, I was a yoga instructor back home; was there anything else I enjoyed?” I asked.

“You liked anything athletic,” he informed me.

I knew from the tone of my body that was true. When I wandered to the gym, the smell, the weights, and environment made me dizzy with excitement. “Did I have any other hobbies? Did I cook?” I asked, wondering about the woman on the cooking show and why I’d stopped the channel there.

“You were never interested in cooking as far as I knew. You did like volleyball though,” he said with a smile.

I remembered a volleyball game going on at the beach when I first went down. Before my paranoia and doubts consumed me, I’d watched them with a strange pleasure. “Okay,” I exclaimed, feeling a rush of excitement roll through me. “So, when can we visit my place in Portland?” I asked eagerly.

“I’ll look into it. I have to hustle this week to make up for the last two, so maybe in a week or two,” he assured me.

I wanted to go now. I felt like being in my own apartment would jar a memory from me. Maybe it was the key I needed to unlock all that was hidden in my mind. “I can go alone,” I offered.

His face turned a strange pale color, and his lips tightened. It was obvious he wasn’t a fan of that idea. “I’m not sure that’s safe,” he insisted.

“I can handle myself,” I protested, but quickly realized I’d nearly drowned because I forgot when high tide was. Maybe he was right. Maybe it wasn’t safe for me to go alone.

Chapter Nine

Isaac

“Isaac,” Maddie called from the kitchen. The phone had rung, and I didn’t get to it quick enough, so as feared, she held the receiver in her hand. “It’s Beth, from your office,” she smiled.

Fuck!

“Thanks,” I choked and took the phone from her hand. Her eyes stared into mine, making me a bit uneasy. “Hey, Beth, what’s up?” I asked, somewhat irritated she hadn’t tried my cell first.

              “Things are getting pretty backed up here; you plan on coming in today?” she asked.

I’d had a great weekend with Maddie, playing volleyball on the beach, and even getting her to snuggle in my bed with me, no sex, but sensual cuddling. I didn’t want to leave. I hated Mondays more than I’d ever hated them at that moment.

“Sure. Why didn’t you call my cell?” I asked.

“I did, twice; you didn’t answer,” she snarled through the receiver. “Who was it that answered?” she probed.

“I’ll see you in twenty minutes,” I growled into the phone.

“Have I met Beth?” Maddie asked.

“I don’t think so,” I blurted.

This was turning into a mess. One lie after another, and I was digging my hole deeper and deeper. “I have to go in though, so I’ll see you later, take you to dinner?” I suggested with a quick kiss on her forehead.

I was afraid to leave her, worried that she would break down again like the last time, but I had no choice.

Maddie stood against the kitchen counter, her hair flowing from her shoulders and her bright pink lips puckered in a pouting position. “I won’t be long,” I promised, and left, even though my cock begged me to stay.

I felt like an ass for telling her so many lies. She would hate me for sure when her memory returned, and I’d lose her forever. She had come to Miami once before, but that was it, and we were just friends then. This trip, I planned to tell her how I felt about her since we went to school together, and I had the scene all played out in my mind about how she’d react, but I never got the chance.

Beth stood in the office, her face stern and demanding. I knew she wanted answers for my absence lately, and who the woman was on the other end of the phone. I didn’t have answers; not ones she’d appreciate anyway.

“I have to take care of something.” I rushed into my office, closing the door behind me.

I unlocked my safe and pulled out Maddie’s phone. When I turned it on Rob’s number was blasted all over it, fifteen calls over the weekend, and several texts. I scrolled through them, all the same thing. He wants to talk to her, he is worried, and the last one a threat to call the police to have them come find her. My heart raced and beat hard against my chest as I stared at the threat. She was an adult; would they bother? Not usually. But, if he was convincing enough, they might. Then what?

“Knock, knock,” Beth said as she opened my door. “You gonna tell me what in the hell is going on or what?” she demanded.

Her dark eyes were filled with curiosity, the kind a woman has that she won’t let go of. I knew that look, and I knew well enough that Beth Crawford was not going to let this lie; she was going to pry and pry until she popped the lid to this can of worms.

“Come in,” I offered, and sat down at my desk.

Beth took the chair in front of my desk, her legs crossed and her lips tightened into a straight line. I took a deep breath and prayed that she would understand. She was an abuse survivor herself; she had to understand.

“Who’s the woman at your house?” she probed.

“She’s an old friend,” I explained.

“Okay. So, why haven’t you mentioned her?” she asked.

I took a deep breath and pushed back into the soft leather of my office chair. I still wasn’t sure I wanted to get into detail, but I knew if I didn’t,t she’d push me harder. I couldn’t lie to Beth; we’d worked together too many long hours. “Is that why you’ve been so busy?” she added.

“Yes. She was in the hospital,” I started, and watched the concern flood Beth’s eyes. “She arrived here about three weeks ago. We went for a jog, and she was hit by a car. She lost her memory,” I explained.

“Oh my, that is horrible,” Beth gasped, her hand reaching to her mouth. I stared at her, hoping to find a way to spilt out the rest, but couldn’t get myself to utter the words, the horrible words that explained what I’d done.

“Will she regain her memory?” Beth asked.

“They believe so. She has already begun to pick up a few memories here and there, and she had a bad nightmare last week about her life back in Portland,” I sighed, knowing this is where I’d have to spill the beans.

“Her life was bad there?” Beth inquired.

I nodded. “She had a fiancé that she’d left. He was abusive, and she called me asking if she could hide out here for a while until things calmed down,” I explained.

“Has he tried to contact her?” Beth asked.

I held up the phone that I took from Maddie as she lay in the street unconscious. “He has,” I sighed.

“You have her phone?” Beth snapped, sounding protective over the woman’s privacy, even though she didn’t know her.

“I didn’t want her to be bothered. I was protecting her from him. He’s apologizing and acting like everything is fine and she should come home. You know what that’s like; you lived it. Can you imagine if he knew she had amnesia? He would manipulate her into doing anything he wanted,” I argued, my voice beginning to rise.

“So, what have you told her?” Beth leered at me.

“I didn’t want to give the cops her real name, so I told them she was Maddie Grubbs, not Maddie Stewart, and since she had a ring on her finger, I said I was—” I stated.

Beth’s hand was covering her mouth, and I knew it was hanging open in disbelief. She didn’t understand, not fully, but I knew I could trust her to keep my secret. “Isaac, did you tell her you were her fiancé?” she gasped.

“I did. But, I need to protect her from her past. I love her, I’ve always loved her, and I couldn’t bear to lose her,” I proclaimed.

“You don’t think you’re gonna lose her when she finds out you’ve been lying to her?” she snapped.

I knew there was a good chance that I would lose Maddie when she found out. A part of me hoped she’d never regain her full memory, but the other part that knew she would and was just willing to lose her in order to protect her from her ex, and to give her time to heal.

“I’m hoping she’ll fall in love with me by then, see how good I am for her, and then she’ll understand why I had to lie in order to protect her,” I replied.

“Isaac, you can’t make someone love you,” Beth whispered, her eyes growing narrow as they stared into mine.

I wasn’t trying to make Maddie love me; I knew she did already. She was never given the chance to find out exactly how good we’d be together, but now, she was already starting to see we are a great fit.

“Isaac, have you slept with her?” Beth asked carefully.

I took a deep breath and then brought my hands to my head. I leaned forward, letting my elbows rest on my desk while my hands cupped my head. I didn’t want to look at her, not directly.

“Isaac! This is so fucking wrong,” Beth exclaimed. “I know you’re a good man, but this isn’t right. You helped me in my case; you know how abuse victims feel, and how easily they are hurt. I get that you want to protect her, and I even understand what you’re doing to an extent, but all I see is this blowing up in your face, and possibly hurting Maddie, not helping her,” she added.

My eyes itched from irritation as I fought back tears. I knew she was right, at least about some of what she said, but I had to do what I felt was best for Maddie.

“You need to tell her; you can’t keep doing this to her and expect a good outcome. If you truly love her, tell her the truth,” Beth pleaded.

Her words were falling on deaf ears. I couldn’t tell Maddie, not with Rob Fallon still calling her, begging her to come back. Maddie had been strong and left him; now it was my job to be strong for her and keep him away, no matter what it took.

Beth glared at me from her office the rest of the day. I finished up paperwork for clients who’d been pushed to the back burner while I dealt with Maddie and her issues.

I ended up promising Beth I would tell her when the time was right, but not right away.

As I walked through the front door of my house, panic set in as the smell of something burning wafted under my nose. I rushed into the kitchen and found Maddie at the kitchen table, her head down and arms folded in front of her. I placed my hand on her back, “Are you okay?” I asked.

Her head lifted, and it was obvious she’d been crying. “I thought maybe I liked to cook since I watched the cooking show,” she sniffled.

I fought back my laughter as I looked around the kitchen. Pots and pans were everywhere, and on top of the stove, something unrecognizable was burnt to a crisp inside one of my pans. “Well, you may just need some practice,” I chuckled lightly. A faint smile appeared on her face as her eyes lit up my heart. “A lot more practice,” I laughed.

She finally broke free from her soured mood and laughed with me. “I was having fun until I burnt everything,” she laughed.

I sat down at the table, reached across, and took her hand in mine. Our eyes locked, and even though hers were still filled with sadness and frustration, I could see a glimmer of hope within them. “Where did you get the recipe?” I asked, hoping to find out what this meal was supposed to be.

“From the TV. I thought I wrote everything down, but I messed up something, obviously,” she smirked.

“Well, maybe you need a TV in the kitchen, so you can follow along,” I suggested and received a wide smile for my offer.

I calmed her down, gave her a big hug, and sent her off to get a shower. I worked on cleaning up the kitchen.

After nearly an hour, Maddie came downstairs wearing a pretty blue sundress that matched her eyes and stood in the doorway. “I thought we could go out for dinner,” she said softly.

I snickered as I put the last washed pan away and quickly tied the garbage bag that held two pans I couldn’t salvage from her abuse. “That’s a great idea,” I smiled.

Maddie didn’t talk much on the ride to the restaurant. We agreed on a nice little Italian place, and after that, she played with the stereo, switching from station to station, trying to find something familiar, or at least something she liked. Finally, she stopped on a classic rock station and sat back in her seat. As Don Mclean belted out “American Pie,” Maddie began to sing along. Her cheeks brightened pink, and her eyes widened as she began to effortlessly spit out the lyrics. Watching her smile and listening to the sweet melody of her voice made my heart swell in my chest, tightening it to the point I felt my rib cage would crack open.

“Oh my god! I knew that song,” she exclaimed, so bouncy and excited in the passenger seat of my Escalade.

“See, you’re getting your memory back. It just takes time,” I smiled.

Time? I was running out of time. Her memory was returning, and quickly. What was I going to do when she finally remembered everything? It could be sooner than I realized… than I hoped.

Chapter Ten

Maddie

The clouds in the sky turned an eerie shade of gray, and the grass beneath my feet caught fire. I ran as fast as I could, running from the fire, but not knowing where to hide. Sweat poured down my forehead, trickling into my eyes, making them itch. My skin felt icy cold, even with the heat of the fire so close behind me. I wanted out of this place, but how? Where was I?

Maddie! My name was called, and then again, Maddie!

The voice was familiar, one I’d certainly heard before. I ran towards the voice, deeper and deeper into the darkness. The fire at my feet stopped chasing me, and suddenly the sky turned bright blue with no cloud in sight. Where was I? Where was whoever had called me?

I walked slowly through the tall green grass; it was plush and soothing to my bare feet. I was wearing my nightgown, the same one I’d put on before bed, but I wasn’t in bed anymore. This wasn’t Isaac’s guest bedroom, and it didn’t look like any place I’d ever been. Maddie!

I followed the voice, walking past a large weeping willow tree and then over a small hill. A figure, a man, stood at the bottom of the hill near a creek. He was tall, with dark hair and tanned skin. Muscles rippled from his arms and down his chest like a washboard. I stopped as he turned towards me, his dark eyes piercing through my heart and into my soul. “Rob?” I muttered. Who was Rob, and did I know him?

“Come to me; I won’t hurt you,” the man spoke.

I was scared, frozen in my spot. My heart strings were being tugged at viciously as I so wanted to run into his strong arms. He was so familiar, so inviting, but something was making me stay where I was, frozen on the hill.

He started to walk towards me, and I turned to look over my shoulder for an escape. The grass fire was back, this time higher and hotter, and headed right for me. “Run to me,” the man called out, his arms wide open to catch me and protect me.

“No,” I shouted, but didn’t move in either direction.

His eyes turned red and fiery like the grass, and he rushed towards me. When he stopped, he stood right in front of me, his eyes no longer red, and his face chiseled to perfection. “Rob?” I asked again.

He nodded, “I’m here.”

My body fell limp, falling right into his arms. I was warm there, safe there, and for a moment, I knew I knew this man. My eyes closed as he held me, squeezing me tightly and nuzzling his lips on my neck. It felt good, real good. My pussy twitched with excitement, and my nipples tingled as they pressed against his hard chest. Yes, I did know this man, but how?

My eyes opened and watched the fiery grass burning all around us in a perfect circle. It started to close in, getting closer and closer to where we stood. “We have to go,” I shouted, but he didn’t move. His squeeze around me tightened and caused me to let out a squeal from the pain. “Let me go!” I screamed.

He looked down at me, his eyes shining fire red once again. “You aren’t going anywhere,” he snarled, and then brought one hand from my waist to my neck. He gripped me hard, causing me to choke. I could feel the air being restricted and my brain growing dizzy. My hands pulled at his fingers, trying to force them to release, but he was too strong.

Everything flashed red, and then went black as I gasped for breath. He was gone, I was in my bed, and without any control, I let out a loud scream into the dark room.

“Maddie,” Isaac’s warm, but panicked, voice was music to my ears. He pushed through the bedroom door and rushed to my side. “Are you okay?” he asked, still obviously rattled.

Tears rolled down my face as I absorbed all the emotion thrown at me during the nightmare. “It was him again,” I gasped.

“Who?” he asked.

“The man from my nightmare, he was trying to hurt me again, but I know I knew him, I could feel it. I kept calling him Rob,” I rattled, still shaken by the experience that felt so real.

I looked up to Isaac, hoping to get some answers, but his face was pale and without expression. “Why do you think you know him?” he asked.

“Because, I could feel it, and I called him Rob, he answered to Rob,” I explained spastically.

“Do you know him now?” Isaac asked.

I shook my head. I didn’t. The memory, or the start of one, was gone. “Did someone try to hurt me?” I asked.

“I think this is all from the accident. Memories come back in weird ways; the doctor told us that,” he stated.

That twinge of guilt returned in my gut. Maybe I was cheating on Isaac with this man, this man named Rob who was not willing to let me go, and would go to any lengths to keep me. Was I a good person?

I stared into Isaac’s beautiful green eyes and wondered if I was capable of hurting him like that. He obviously didn’t believe me or believe that I’d been hurt, so it had to be something I kept a secret. Why else would I keep the secret about a man hurting me from my fiancé?

“I need therapy,” I blurted out, figuring someone other than Isaac might be good for me to talk to. “It’s been nearly a month, and I still haven’t remembered much,” I added.

“We can ask for a sleeping aid at your next follow-up,” he offered.

“I don’t want a fucking sleeping aid. I need to talk to someone, to figure out why I can’t remember who hurt me,” I snapped.

“Maddie, why would anyone hurt you?” he asked.

I didn’t care if he believed me or not. I knew someone hurt me, and his name was Rob. I just didn’t know why he hurt me, or who he was to me. “It doesn’t matter if you don’t believe me. I know something happened, and I need to figure this all out,” I hissed.

“I just think you should let this all happen naturally. If you push it, the doctors said you could end up with false memories, and that would set you back even further,” he insisted.

“So, you don’t think therapy is a good idea?” I questioned, confused by his lack of encouragement.

“No, I don’t,” he stated firmly.

“And, me going to Portland, is that ever going to happen?” I snarled.

“I’m working on it,” he insisted.

“You can’t just keep me here, hold me hostage from my life,” I demanded.

“Maddie, I am only trying to do what’s best for you, to protect you,” Isaac said softly.

I wanted to believe that was true, but something didn’t feel right. Why is he trying so hard to keep me all to himself?

I couldn’t have shown up here with so little belongings that they fit in one suitcase, and where was my phone, or my wallet? I knew the cops would’ve found them by now. I was growing more and more frustrated with my situation as the days flew by. My memory wasn’t where I wanted it to be, and although I was starting to feel connected to Isaac, at times he seemed like a total stranger to me.

In the gym, I felt like I belonged, but I didn’t feel that way in this house. I still didn’t feel like I’d ever stepped foot in this house before.

“Maddie, I love you. I only want what’s best for you. I’ll take you to Portland as soon as I get work caught up, and if the doctor thinks therapy is best, then I’ll agree,” he said sweetly.

It was the first time he’d told me he loved me since the accident. My heart raced in my chest as I thought about those three little words. Did I love Isaac? I mean, I must’ve if we were engaged, but I couldn’t bring myself to utter them just yet.

“Thank you,” I said softly, avoiding returning the admiration.

Chapter Eleven

Isaac

I slid out of the bed, leaving the curvy silhouette of Maddie’s body beneath the sheets. Damn, she is sexy. I loved watching her sleep so peacefully, no more bad dreams for the last couple nights, and she’d finally let up on the million questions. It was obvious she didn’t think things connected, and she wasn’t wrong. They didn’t. I just hoped that after a little more time together, things would start to feel more natural.

The mailman waved as I stepped outside to grab the newspaper. The sun was hot, making me wish I could take the day off and play on the beach with Maddie. “Hey, Tim,” I waved back to the man in the blue shorts.

Damn, why is she pushing so hard to go to Portland? I knew I was going to have to take her eventually, but acting like things were hectic at work was the only excuse I had, so no more days off.

I wondered often what would happen if she stepped foot into her own apartment. There were probably pictures of her and Rob all over the place, little reminders of their love spread everywhere to trigger her memory and send more questions towards me. What if she only remembers the good in Rob? What if she forgets that he is the bad guy, and that I am the good guy?

I pulled my mail from the basket near my door and walked back inside. The air conditioning was refreshing from the heat of the Florida winter sun. I scanned through the mail, not finding anything too interesting, and tossed it on the long table by the stairs to sort later.

The aroma of coffee filled the room as I walked into the kitchen. I grabbed my favorite mug, poured it full of coffee, and leaned against the counter to think. Was I the good guy in this? Was it my place to hide Maddie from her real life and try to create a new one, a safer one for her here?

“Good morning.” Maddie wiped her eyes gently and then yawned after mumbling her greeting.

She was wearing one of my dress shirts, three buttons undone from the top, and nothing but panties on underneath. Her hair was messy, but still sexy. I couldn’t take my eyes off of her. “Good morning,” I smiled, my dick twitching in my pants as she lifted her arms to stretch. Just a glimpse of those white cotton panties and I was half-mast.

Sleeping in the same bed had been nice, but not having sex was becoming torturous. Her scent drove me wild, and the warmth of her body made my urges hard to control. But, I was a perfect gentleman, holding her against me and not asking for anything more, even though I wanted nothing more than to bury my face between her legs and taste the sweet nectar her pussy had to offer.

“You working today?” she asked, her mouth still partially open from her yawn, and her words slurring as if she were drunk.

“I am,” I regretted.

“I might go to the gym again today,” she announced. My heart raced and panic set in. I hated her going to the gym. Rob owned a gym, the gym where she used to work as a personal trainer and not a yoga teacher like I had told her she was. I knew the more time she spent there, the more likely she was to remember him.

“I think it might rain,” I blurted.

“It looks beautiful outside,” she said, leaning towards the window to peek out at the ocean. It was beautiful. The sun was shining so bright it might as well be July, not December. There was only a small breeze, no clouds in the sky, and I knew the weather channel said the day was going to be perfect. “It may rain later. I just wouldn’t want you to get stuck out in it,” I said convincingly.

She shrugged her shoulders and tossed me a smile. “I’m a big girl; I’m sure I’ll be fine.”

I knew the stress I was feeling was displayed all over my face, so I walked away while she made herself a cup of coffee. I fumbled through the mail that I’d gotten earlier when she walked up behind me. I could feel the warmth of her body against my back, and as she stretched up on her tippy toes to look over my shoulder, I felt her breasts brush against me. Fuck, my dick is aching.

“Anything for me?” she asked.

“No,” I chuckled.

“Why not?” she pouted.

I turned around, noticing she was feeling upset and displaced once again. “You don’t get any mail here,” I explained.

“But, don’t I have any friends here, or home, or just people that are worried about me, looking for me?” she asked.

With a man like Rob, she had no friends at all. “Your parents have been gone since you were a girl. Your grandmother raised you, and she passed after you graduated college,” I explained.

The sadness in her eyes made my heart ache. “I know I don’t remember them right now, but for some reason the pain of knowing they’re gone is strong,” she gasped, holding onto her chest for a moment while she gathered her emotions.

“I’m sorry, baby,” I offered, and wrapped my arms around her for a tight squeeze.

My hands rested on her ass cheeks, loving the soft but tight flesh beneath my fingertips. Baseball, Roseanne Barr, dill pickles, aahhh, my dick obeyed my words by slowly deflating before it pressed hard into Maddie and scared her away.

“What’s this,” she asked, snatching a square envelope from my hand. Her body pulled away as she read the label that simply said, Mr. Isaac Lewis. “Is this an invitation?” she probed, staring up at me with bright blue eyes.

I took it from her hand, shrugged, and opened it to reveal an elaborately decorated invitation for an upcoming charity event.

“Why wasn’t it addressed to both of us,” she questioned, obviously in another one of her moods where she doubted everything about our relationship.

“I’m not going anyways,” I shrugged, tossing the invite back onto the table.

Maddie’s eyes widened, and her lips tightened as she stared at the invite with contempt. 

“I feel like a prisoner here. I need friends; I must’ve had some, if not back home, then here,” she hissed.

“You had clients back home, and here, you had me,” I said, knowing I was running out of excuses. This was becoming harder and harder, and I knew the more I lied that this was not the best way to handle this situation. It was too late now though; I was unable to go back in time and fix this, so now, I had to ride it out and pray for the best.

I watched her stomp off, heading to the guest room like an angry teenager. I was treating her like a child, or something so fragile it couldn’t leave its bubble, but I had to, at least for now.

At the office, Beth immediately cornered me with questions about Maddie. “Have you told her yet?” she pushed.

“No,” I replied, walking fast to get away from her and into my office.

“Isaac, you’re really fucking up,” she insisted.

I reached my office, turne,t and smiled before shutting my door on her. Once inside, I opened the safe, pulled out Maddie’s phone, and checked for more messages, more texts. There wasn’t anything new, not for days. That lil’ fucker gave up, thank God!

It felt as though an elephant just got up from sitting on my chest. I could breathe again, finally.

Beth tapped on the door as she opened it. “What are you so giddy about?” she asked.

My smile was wide, I could feel it stretching my cheeks, but I couldn’t stop it. I was on cloud nine. “He gave up,” I smirked, holding the phone in the air.

Beth smiled. “Good, then you have no reason not to tell her,” she insisted.

I didn’t, except for the fact she may hate me, leave me, and I’d never see her again.

“I’m in pretty deep,” I admitted, knowing Beth was right.

“Yes, but you can still explain,” she urged.

I wasn’t sure that was possible. “What if she never remembers? If I hurt her, she has nowhere to go, and she doesn’t know anyone; she could end up in a real dilemma,” I explained.

Beth sat in the chair across from my desk. Her face was pale and lacking expression as she stared into my eyes. “She has no one else?” she asked.

I shook my head.

“She can’t be alone, that’s true, not like this anyway. If she went back home now, her ex would surely work his way back into her life,” Beth rationalized my thinking out loud. “How do you know this guy is bad?” she asked.

“Maddie told me,” I explained.

“Did she call you, text you, e-mail you?” she queried.

“She sent a couple e-mails over a week and then a few texts before making the phone call to tell me she’d made arrangements to head this way.

“Can I see those?” Beth asked.

I leaned back in my chair and exhaled loudly. I showed her the messages.

“What’s the ex’s name?” Beth asked.

“Rob Fallon,” I replied.

“I take it you’ve looked him up, ran a background on him?” she questioned.

“Of course, and he’s squeaky clean, not even so much as a parking ticket,” I growled. Her lips tightened again. “Look, I know what she told me, and I don’t want her anywhere near that bastard,” I spat.

“You need to show her the evidence and maybe that would help her understand your motives,” she sighed.

But if I try to tell her about her past, then all I’m doing is forcing memories on her, and the doctors made it clear they wanted them to come naturally.

“I have to start helping her to remember on her own,” I sighed, slouching into my chair.

Beth smiled sweetly. “You do,” she said softly. I knew she was aware how hard this was going to be for me to do.

I closed my eyes and let my head fall back against my chair as she walked out of the office. I heard the door close, but I didn’t open my eyes to check. I needed to sort this out if I didn’t want to lose Maddie forever.

Chapter Twelve

Maddie

Isaac sat beside me in the hospital lobby. He playfully slapped at my hands as I wrung them like wet rags in my lap. I was nervous, scared, and even a little hopeful. Things had started to surface, not much, but at least some. “You’ll be fine,” Isaac assured me. I smiled in his direction, but I knew it was weak.

“Maddie,” the doctor entered the lobby with a smile. I stood, walked towards him, and didn’t even look back to see if Isaac was coming. I was too nervous to do anything except rush to the private consult room where I could hopefully get some answers.

“How have you been feeling?” the doctor asked with a wide smile.

“Frustrated,” I admitted as Isaac took the seat beside me.

“No memories?” the doctor asked, his tone questioning.

“I’ve had some bad nightmares,” I explained.

I noticed Isaac becoming fidgety in his seat, and the doctor leaning forward in concern. “What kind of nightmares?” he probed.

I explained to him in detail about the nightmares, and how odd I thought it was that I knew the man in my dream, but I didn’t know how. The doctor asked Isaac if there was a Rob in my life, or his, and he said no just like he had when I asked. It just didn’t make sense. “Did anyone attack Maddie or hurt her that you know of?” the doctor asked directly to Isaac.

“No,” he assured him.

“It could be a good sign. Maybe this is how your mind is going to heal and unravel the secrets it's hiding,” the doctor smiled.

I told him about the song, and the music box, and then the cooking show that led to a disaster. “Maybe cooking is something you’ve always wanted to do, but didn’t,” the doctor suggested. “That would be a great hobby for you, but I suggest starting out small and working your way into the tougher recipes,” he chuckled.

His smile was warm and inviting, and his eyes honest and pure. I trusted him when he told me things would get better, and I had to just believe him.

“As for the memory triggers, you said Maddie didn’t live here, and that you would make a trip to Portland; has that happened yet?” he asked Isaac.

“I’ve been trying to get caught up on work,” he said quickly.

“Okay, well, we need to make that happen as soon as possible,” the doctor instructed.

“I offered to go alone,” I chimed in, hoping he’d give me the pass to go if Isaac never made the plans.

“I don’t think that is such a good idea. Unless you have someone that you know and trust to meet you at the airport,” the doctor said.

Ugh! I didn’t know anyone, so how would I know if they were to be trusted?

“Is there a chance that I’ll never remember?” I asked, my voice squeaking as I spoke.

I was scared to death to hear the answer. I couldn’t imagine leaving twenty-five years behind and starting fresh, no memories, nothing.

“There is always a chance, but I would say that is less than two percent,” the doctor replied.

Relief fell over me like a warm blanket. That was a very low chance, but I shuddered at the thought of there still being that chance.

“So, for now, I want you to use cooking as a hobby, stay at the gym where you said you felt the most comfortable, and plan that trip to Portland,” he smiled directly at me. His teeth were so white they nearly glowed, and his dark hair wavy and long, falling onto his shoulders in a loose curl. He was a handsome man. I wondered if that was my type before. I looked at Isaac, blond, cropped hair, beautiful green eyes, muscular and serious. Was he my type?

“Well, that was all good news,” Isaac boasted as we left the office.

“I guess,” I sighed.

“Let’s get some food,” Isaac suggested.

I was hungry, but I wasn’t sure what I wanted. I hated not remembering what I liked until I saw it or tasted it. “I have no idea what I want,” I whined.

“I have an idea,” Isaac boasted with a wide smile smeared across his face. He gripped my hand and pulled me towards the Escalade where he helped me inside. He wouldn’t tell me where we were going, and no matter how many times I begged for a hint, he just smirked.

Finally, we pulled into a restaurant parking lot with a large sign that read “World’s Largest Buffet,” I smiled, realizing he was going to let me try everything I wanted in one sitting.

“Seriously?” I laughed.

“Yes. You can at least see everything, smell it, and just put what you think you like on your plate,” he instructed as he slid out of the truck.

He came to my side, helped me out of the truck, and then slid his hand in mine as we walked towards the front door.

The aroma of all the foods cooked inside made my mouth water. I was ready to try it all. “They have ethnic foods in each of the four corners,” he pointed out as he showed me where everything was organized.

We took a seat in a booth that was nearest to the buffet and ordered water from the waitress. Isaac smiled as he handed me a plate. “Ready to try?”

I was so ready. This would be a great chance for me to learn something about myself, even if it was something as simple as knowing my tastes.

I held my plate and walked with Isaac through the buffet tables. He reached for all the fried foods, spicy Asian dishes, and decadent desserts while I was a little choosier. By the time we made it back to the table, I’d chosen brown rice, salmon, asparagus, fresh fruit, and a fresh spinach salad. “Wow, you went right back to your roots,” Isaac teased.

“I did?” I asked excitedly.

He nodded with a smile. “You were a yoga instructor, and look at your body. Of course you ate healthily,” he teased.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I questioned, feeling a little uneasy about whether he truly knew me or not.

“The doctor said not to push anything on you, to let you make the choices,” he explained.

I knew he had, but I also knew that Isaac hadn’t brought very many options for healthy foods into the house while I’d been there. Cookies, chocolate milk, and large jars of peanut butter were in abundance, but as far as healthy choices, a few fruit options, iced tea, and salad mixes were about it.

“See, your brain knows what it wants,” Isaac smiled.

“I guess it does,” I replied, feeling a sense of connection to myself for once.

“So, you want to buy a TV for the kitchen so you can follow the cooking shows like the doctor suggested?” he asked.

I wasn’t completely sold on the idea of cooking as a hobby, especially after my last incident of nearly burning down the house. “You may have had it as a secret desire somewhere deep in your mind,” he convinced me.

“Okay,” I agreed.

If my brain knew what it wanted, then sleeping with Isaac that night must’ve been a sign. I tried eating a few different things, and my brain told me instantly I didn’t like it, like mustard, dill pickles, and chunky peanut butter. I loved the sex with Isaac, his touch, his scent, his flavor. If that wasn’t something I wanted, my brain would’ve shut it down like it had the pickle that I tried to swallow, right?

We left the restaurant, but not before Isaac had gone back for seconds, mostly desserts. How in the hell does he stay so fit eating like that?

We stopped at the electronics store and bought a thirty-two inch TV for the kitchen, and Isaac was eager to get it hooked up and some healthy cooking shows set up in the DVR for me to follow. “Anything you need, like ingredients, just tell me,” he insisted.

“Are you going to eat it?” I asked, wondering if he even cared about eating well. I’d never seen him work out, there were no weights in the house, and he never offered to go to the gym with me. If the gym, eating healthy, and saving the planet were things that were important to me, what did we even have in common?

“I’ll try,” he grinned.

His green eyes widened, and he stared at me with a hunger. My body was reacting to the time we’d spent together, and the way he looked right then in front of me. I wanted him, but I wasn’t sure I was ready. It had been a long day, and I had a lot on my mind.

“I’ve got some work to do,” Isaac sighed, obviously disappointed by my lack of interest in his seductive eyes.

“Okay. I’m going to take a shower and head to bed,” I replied, trying to act as casual as possible.

“I’ll meet you in bed soon. Keep my side of the bed warm,” he winked.

I smiled forcibly, trying to hide my reservations. I’d been sleeping in his bed for the last few nights, but a part of me wanted my own space for the evening. “Would you mind if I slept in the guest room tonight? I’m just really exhausted,” I asked shyly.

His squared chin shifted, and his eyes narrowed as he worked a smile onto his face. I watched his long fingers, the ones that had teased my pussy so skillfully, slide through his short blond crew cut. Tingles of excitement rolled through my body, making me question my decision. “I understand,” Isaac said sweetly.

He leaned in, lowering his tall frame to snatch a quick kiss from my lips. Electricity shot through my body from our touch. His lips were so soft, so smooth, that I wanted to suck them into my mouth and get every last ounce of flavor from them.

Isaac pulled back, his eyes glowing with mischief, and his lips curled into a wickedly sexy smile. Fuck, he knows I want him.

“Goodnight,” I blurted and rushed past him and up the stairs to my room.

I wisht I could shake the feeling of doubts I had about Isaac. He is an amazing man, sexy, smart, and sensitive. He’s been nothing but sweet to me this entire time, and I am starting to fall for him. I just can’t let go of the feeling that something isn’t quite right.

Chapter Thirteen

Isaac

I walked into the house to a smell of something not burnt coming from the kitchen. As I entered the room, Maddie was stirring something on one of the frying pans she hadn’t ruined on her first attempt. The TV displayed a woman wearing yoga pants with a blonde ponytail. Her voice was perky as she went on and on about how important it is to eat well and stay in shape.

Maddie seemed happy as she wiggled her hips in the same motion as her wooden spatula. My cock twitched against my jeans, anxious to feel the warmth of her tight pussy contracting around me. A soft growl escaped my throat, causing her to turn in my direction. “Hey, when did you get home?” she asked cheerfully.

“Just now,” I smiled, certain my cheeks were red as fire as I tried to calm the erection growing in my pants. “I see you’re enjoying your new hobby,” I said sweetly as I moved towards her.

“I didn’t burn anything,” she laughed, the dimples in her cheeks sinking in as deep as they had when she was just a girl. “I didn’t have all the ingredients, but I think it turned out okay,” she smiled.

“It smells amazing,” I boasted, actually being truthful. It did smell good, but then again, anything would’ve smelled better than her last attempt of a meal.

“So, you’ll try it?” she asked excitedly.

I couldn’t help but smirk as she bounced in front of me, her excitement overwhelmingly thrilling. “What is it?” I asked, still concerned about what she may ask me to eat.

She pulled out a chair at the table and motioned for me to sit. I slid in and watched as she prepared two plates. A pile of whole grain rice with slices of asparagus and what appeared to be almond slivers was piled on the plate, and then a small chicken breast with something green oozing from its center was placed on top. She drizzled some type white sauce over the top and then garnished the plate with a sprig of thyme. “Wow,” I exclaimed as she placed a plate in front of me. It was a work of art. “It’s beautiful,” I smiled, watching her eyes twinkle and her cheeks brighten to a beautiful shade of pink.

She sat down beside me and watched me as I picked up my fork. The pressure of her anticipation was freaking me out. What if I don’t like it?

“Here goes,” I grinned, scooping up a large bite onto my fork. My hand shook a little as it reached to my mouth. Her eyes were drilling into me as the food passed my lips. An array of unfamiliar flavors hit my tongue, some amazing, some not so amazing, but it wasn’t bad. It wasn’t bad at all. “Do you like it?” she asked eagerly.

I smiled and nodded, still chewing the chicken that was a little overcooked.

She sighed with relief and then started to eat from her own plate. I watched her chew the food, her smile widening with each bite. The knowledge that she never cooked, and actually hated to cook, made me feel warm inside. If she could learn to love this, then why couldn’t she learn to love me too?

“I used your laptop today,” Maddie announced.

My eyes widened on her, following her hand as it scraped at the rice on her plate. What the fuck did she do on there? My heart raced as I waited patiently for her to explain.

“I hope you don’t mind,” she added with a faint smile.

I braced for anything she would say next, certain that it would spell my doom.

“I wanted to check social media pages, like Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram,” she said casually.

“Oh,” is all I could manage to say.

“I didn’t mean to invade your privacy, it’s ju-just so frustrating not knowing anything, and I thought…” Maddie trailed off on her thoughts to stare down at her plate. “I thought I could find out who Rob was, who I was, and maybe see some things about us that would help me,” she added.

“Did you find what you were looking for?” I asked, trying hard not to choke on my words.

“No,” she sighed. I couldn’t have been more relieved, but it still hurt to watch her so frustrated. “There were three Maddie Grubbs on there, but none of them were my profile,” she complained.

Fuck, that’s right; she doesn’t know she’s Maddie Stewart.

“You didn’t really get into all that social media stuff,” I told her.

“You have a Facebook and Twitter, but not much on there,” she sighed.

“No. I don’t really use it for myself. It’s good to have to check on clients,” I explained.

She looked so disappointed. I hated to see her so upset, but I knew it wasn’t a good time to spill the beans on what her last name actually was, or why I’d changed it.

I’d checked out her social media pages, and they were filled with pictures of her and Rob. All the posts and updates were filled with where they were going, what they were doing next, and how much they were in love. Fuck! If she saw that, there would be no way she’d believe me about him, no way in hell. I’d have to find a way to get her to remember without any risk of her seeing all the good stuff first.

“Wouldn’t I have had something for my yoga classes?” she asked.

I could feel my face turning pale as I tried to come up with an answer. She wasn’t a yoga instructor, but a personal trainer, and yes, she had plenty of accounts dedicated to her career, but they all linked to the gym that Rob Fallon owned.

“I thought you said something about closing them down until you got settled here,” I lied. Fuck, all I do is lie anymore.

She seemed satisfied enough with my response, but I could see a glimmer of confusion and doubt in her beautiful blue eyes. “Why don’t we watch a movie tonight, and just relax?” I suggested, hoping to change the subject.

She nodded and offered a faint smile in my direction. Yeah, she isn’t buying this shit no more.

I sent her upstairs to take a shower, and I stayed in the kitchen to clean up after dinner. She really wasn’t used to cooking; the mess made that obvious.

As I washed the pots and pans, my mind wandered to what Beth had warned: that I’d lose Maddie forever if I didn’t come clean soon. My fear was that even if I did come clean now, I’d still lose her. I couldn’t bear the thought of her hating me.

Upstairs, the bedroom door was closed to the guest room, but no sounds of the shower came through. I thought about knocking, just to check on her, but decided to give her some space. It was a rough day for her; I knew that.

I stripped out of my clothes and grabbed a pair of sleep pants and a towel from the closet before heading into my private bathroom.

Staring in the mirror at myself made me cringe. What was I doing? I was so selfish. I knew I’d started this to protect Maddie, but now I feared I was continuing to protect myself. I was better than this. Maddie deserved better than this.

My fists clenched so hard that veins bulged from the tops of my hands and my shoulders felt tight. I wanted to punch the image in the mirror, just knock him the fuck out.

I stepped into the shower, turning the water on as hot as I could make it, and let it roll over my sore muscles. Maddie’s blue eyes were all I could see when my eyelids rolled shut. I pushed my face into the water, letting the heat steam away the image that was haunting me. Fuck, I have to fix this. I have to tell her the truth.

I shut the water off, patted myself dry with the large plush towel, and slid on my sleep pants. As I walked out of my room, shirtless, wet hair, and ready to spill the entire story to Maddie, I stopped. She stood in the hallway, her hair wet from her shower, her bright blue eyes wide and staring right into mine. My cock twitched against the thin material of my sleep pants. Damn, she’s so beautiful.

A look of hunger in her eyes stunned me, freezing me in my spot and rendering me speechless.

Maddie moved towards me, not speaking, just slowly inching herself closer to me in the hall. Her hands reached up, touching my chest, sliding across my damp skin, and then rolling to my shoulders. She stood on her tippy toes, lifting herself up to my level. Our lips grazed against one another’s, and my mind drew a blank as to what I’d planned to do. Blood rushed to my cock, quickly pushing it against the thin material that restricted it from being unleashed.

Her kiss was so soft, so sensual that my entire body tingled when her tongue entered my mouth. “I’m sorry I’ve been so moody,” she whispered.

“You don’t have to apologize. I’m sorry I haven’t helped more,” I admitted as she pushed against me, making me take a step back towards my bedroom.

“You’re helping me now,” she exhaled, pushing me back another couple steps.

I stood in my room, the backs of my legs at the edge of my footboard. Maddie pushed her warm body against mine, letting her cold, damp hair graze over my skin.

Her sweet, delicate hands rolled off my shoulders and back to my chest. Her body lowered in front of me, her hands following with warm caresses down my stomach until stopping at the elastic band on my sleep pants. Her fingers pushed into the material, gripping the hem tightly as she pulled downward, releasing my hard cock with a wild bounce.

I looked down, her blue eyes staring up at me and her red lips wet from her tongue sliding across. Oh, fuck yes; suck me, baby.

My hands reached into her wet locks of blonde hair while she brought her mouth to the tip of my cock. I jolted a little from the sensation of her mouth wrapping around me, and then exhaled hard as she slid her lips down my shaft.

Her eyes continued to look up at me, driving me wild with pleasure as she bobbed between my legs. My ball sack rested in her hand as she gently squeezed and released. I tightened my grip on her hair, entangling my fingers through her locks, and started moving her to the rhythm that worked best. She followed along, sucking hard on my erection, and letting her tongue drag along the large, bulging vein down my shaft. Tiny flicks, tightened cheeks, and the warmth of her saliva was enough to make me explode, but I wanted to wait. Her blue eyes penetrated my soul as she worked her mouth vigorously up and down my manhood. My grip on her hair tightened a bit more as I pulled her away from my cock. Her lips suctioned onto my flesh, and her eyes narrowed with a satisfied tease. She wasn’t ready to let go, but I wasn’t ready to come. I wanted to be inside of her, to feel her pussy squeeze me into submission.

Finally, she released with a loud suction pop in her cheek. I chuckled at her eagerness and commended her for trying to finish me off. I had other plans though: better ones.

I reached down, lifting Maddie to her feet from under her arms. Her tongue licked at her lips, savoring the flavor of the pre-cum she worked from the tip of my cock. “So, how’s this me helping you?” I whispered.

“The doctor said I need normality; this is normal, right?” she smiled.

Fuck, this wasn’t normal, but I couldn’t tell her that now. My cock was aching for her as my hands squeezed at her tiny waist. “Get on the bed,” I instructed, spinning her around in my arms so her back was to the footboard instead of my legs.

Maddie slid out of her nightgown, just a simple long t-shirt, showing off her beautiful body. Her eyes glistened against the light, twinkling as she teased me with her nudity.

My mouth lowered to her breast, so small and tender it fit perfectly between my lips. I sucked hard, pulling her nipple into my teeth for a gentle tug. She moaned so sweetly, so delicately, that my cock reacted with a twitch.

I lifted her from her feet, not releasing my grip on her sweet tit, and tossed her onto the mattress. Her legs fell open, exposing her pink flesh and soft pubic hairs to my hungry eyes.

I stared a moment, not quite ready to lose the beautiful image lying before me. “Are you gonna fuck me or what?” she teased playfully.

I grinned, let out a growl, and shook my head as I savored the sight of her tight little pussy. “Oh yeah,” I gasped.

I rummaged through my drawer until I found the last condom in the box. I ripped open the foil with my teeth and pulled out the latex protection. My eyes returned to Maddie, who now had her hands playfully caressing her body. Her fingers drew dangerously close to her pussy, sliding through her thin, curly pubes. Fuck.

I fumbled with the condom, rolling it over the tip of my cock and down the shaft as she worked her fingers closer and closer to her swollen clit.

I couldn't take it any more, watching those fingers stretch through her pink flesh. I dove onto the bed, gripping her by the thighs and scooting her towards the headboard. My lips pressed against her ankles, slowly sliding up her leg. The scent of her sex was subtle and seductive as I neared her pussy. She moaned as my tongue slid to her pussy, tickling her labia.  Her hips rocked upward, pushing my tongue into her warm hole. The flavor of her juices hit my tongue, erupting a throb in my cock.

She tasted so sweet as I lapped up her juices, sucking them from her and into my mouth. A single finger slid inside, thrusting softly into her as she moaned. My lips closed around her clit, sucking hard enough to pull it gently away from her body. The delicious sound of her heavy breathing and soft moans was stirring a wild pleasure in me that I hadn’t felt with anyone else. Maddie was my dream girl, my love, and here she was in my bed, in my home, wearing a ring she believed I’d given her.

I lifted up from between her legs as her body began to shake. My finger worked inside of her, ensuring her orgasm reached full force. Her eyes closed, her lips parted, and her flesh began to pulsate around my finger as she reached her climax. The noises escaping her lips, the way she squirmed on the mattress, and watching her chest lift and fall with heavy breaths nearly brought me to my own climax.

“Roll over,” I ordered, sliding my finger from between her legs. She quickly obliged, rolling over to give me a nice view of her perfectly toned ass.

I gave her a little slap, just hard enough to make the smack against her flesh and cause her to squeal. Her glutes were so tight, so toned, they didn’t even jiggle from my slap.

“Lift up that pretty ass,” I instructed as I positioned myself behind her on my knees.

Her body lifted from the mattress until she was on all fours. Her ass pushed towards me, exposing the pink flesh I’d just tasted. Her juices dripped from her, clinging to her thin hairs, making me want to dive back in and lap them all up with my tongue.

Maddie pushed backward, pressing her ass cheeks against my belly and letting my cock run through her swollen pussy lips. “You ready?” I whispered.

“Yes,” she gasped, rocking back and forth to create friction between us.

I was ready to explode. My cock was so hard it hurt as I pushed into her, just enough to penetrate. Her rocking wouldn’t allow me to tease her, she made that clear. Her body dropped onto my erection with a quick thrust, and then began pushing on and off of it with a steady pace. I gripped her hips, slowing her down and guiding her to a pace I could handle. Slow and steady.

My eyes focused on the arch in her back, the dip in her spine that led to her beautiful ass. Her blonde hair was starting to dry and flowing down her back. Sweat beaded up on my forehead, not from physical activity, but from the mental strain to stop myself from ejaculating too soon. I never wanted this feeling to end, this beautiful sensation of pleasure and satisfaction.

Her moans grew louder and higher in pitch as her body began to grind against me at a harder and faster pace. Fuck. She was coming again, and there was no way I could hold my climax back once she started to throb, I knew that.

The first throb was small, leaving me feeling confident that I could handle what was next. Soon the next throb started, and then a pulsation that was sporadic and fast paced. Her body clenched around my cock, squeezing it hard and then releasing for only a split second before grabbing again. My back arched towards her as her moans softened and her body began to twitch. There was no fighting the release of my orgasm, and in that moment there was nothing that made me want to. All of my muscles tightened and flexed as warmth radiated throughout my body, blasting from my cock and into the condom barrier between myself and Maddie.

My breathing was rapid, and my grip on Maddie’s hips tightened as I growled and groaned against my will from the sheer pleasure she’d just unleashed through me.

Maddie’s body fell limp, rolling to her side. I hated the abruptness of her warmth pulling away. I jumped from the bed, rushed into the bathroom, and cleaned myself up before returning. She was snuggled under the sheet, her long hair flowing down her arm, and her eyes filled with what appeared to be happiness. “You are so beautiful,” I whispered, making my way to the bed.

I pulled up the sheet, slid in behind her and pulled her into my chest to spoon.

The warmth radiating from her body onto mine was soothing, comforting, and I never wanted to let go. I couldn’t imagine losing her. I couldn’t tell her now; she’d leave for sure.

“Have you thought any more about the trip to Portland?” she asked softly.

Her back was turned to me, so I couldn’t see her face, but I imagined it was filled with hope.

“I have,” I said without offering any other details. I hadn’t thought about it, not really. I dreaded it, and I wanted to prolong it as far back as possible.

“Well, when do you think?” she probed, her head shifting to turn towards me. There they were, those beautiful blue eyes, filled with hope. Fuck!

“I was thinking after Christmas,” I replied, not wanting to disappoint her. I couldn’t take the look of disappointment in her eyes, not right now, not ever.

“So, right after Christmas?” she beamed.

Christmas was only a little over a couple weeks away. I wasn’t ready for this to end, and her visiting Portland would indeed end this. I’d secretly paid for her apartment after tracking down the landlord with the address on her driver’s license, and now I wished I hadn’t. It would be so much easier to tell her she’d been evicted and all her personal stuff donated to charity.

“Sure,” I agreed.

So, that’s that. I get to spend Christmas with Maddie, and then it ends.

Chapter Fourteen

Maddie

I snuck out of bed early to surprise Isaac with breakfast. I stood in the kitchen, staring at the ingredients in the fridge, wondering what he would like. I didn’t know him at all, or myself, and that feeling was so strong hovering over me that even in moments where I was truly happy, a dark cloud still lingered over my heart.

My eyes closed, and I tried with everything I had to remember my life with Isaac. Flashes of the photographs blew through my mind, but I couldn’t make a connection, one of my own. Tears began to flow down my cheeks as I strained for my memories to return when suddenly hands rested on my shoulders. “What’s wrong?” Isaac asked.

I turned, embarrassed that I was having another meltdown, and feeling guilty that I’d put him through so much. “I wanted to make you breakfast, but I don’t know what you like,” I sobbed, falling into his strong arms.

His chest lifted and fell, his laughter growing loud and uncontrollable. I didn’t see what was so funny. “You never made me breakfast, so how would you know?” he said softly.

His hand brushed my hair stuck to my cheek with tears, and I pulled away so I could look into his green eyes. “We’ve made some amazing new memories; why dwell on the past ones that brought us together,” he smiled.

Maybe he was right, but he still had all those memories. I had none.

“Let me take you out to breakfast,” he suggested, leaning in to kiss me on the forehead.

I nodded, unable to argue, unwilling to stay in this gloomy mood. Maybe getting out for a while would do me good.

After quickly dressing, Isaac held the door open for me to exit the house. He was so kind, so sweet, and so patient that my heart melted from his warm smile. He helped me into his Escalade and walked around to his side. Once he got inside, my mind began whirling into a storm of thoughts about how he was killing the planet with his giant vehicle. “So, what do you get in this? Eleven miles to the gallon?” I snipped. My tone startled me, unclear where exactly it came from.

Isaac laughed, “Fifteen.”

My blood was boiling as we pulled out of the driveway and onto the road. Why would anyone need such a large vehicle, especially someone without kids? Kids? My heart started to ache at the thought. Were we planning on having children? I suddenly wanted them, but maybe I didn’t before.

“Did I want children?” I blurted out.

“Yes, you wanted three: two boys and a girl,” he responded, his eyes narrowing on mine as he spoke. “Where is all this coming from?” he asked.

“I don’t know. I just have all these feelings suddenly,” I admitted.

“Feelings?” he questioned.

I didn’t know how to explain it, but it was a surge of random emotions that seemed to be triggered by very small details surrounding me. “Like memories?” he asked.

I shrugged. Maybe. I couldn’t really say they were memories because they weren’t, but they were feelings that were connecting me to who I truly was, who I once was. “Just feelings,” I sighed, pushing back into the leather seat.

I had to admit, the cool morning air was chillier than I liked, so the heated seats on his gas guzzler were comforting. “I used to love the cold,” I blurted out.

Isaac pulled into the parking lot of a small café. He turned off the truck and turned to me. “Yes, you always loved the cold,” he agreed.

“And the snow. I loved the snow,” I gasped. “I wouldn’t move to Florida; I’d never see the snow again,” I verbalized my epiphany.

My eyes were glued to Isaac, waiting on his response. I couldn’t explain the sensation I was having, but it was strong and clear. I knew I loved winter months, and Miami was summer all year long; that wasn’t what I wanted. So, why am I here?

“I didn’t know you felt that way,” Isaac replied.

How could my fiancé not know I felt that way, would I have told him? “I never told you I didn’t want to live in Florida?” I questioned. He shook his head, his eyes filled with a strange fear. “And I agreed to come here to live?” I probed.

“This wasn’t going to be permanent. We talked about moving to New York,” he said quickly, somewhat easing my worries. Maybe I didn’t tell him I wouldn’t live in Florida, just that I wouldn’t do it forever.

He got out of the truck and walked over to my side. He opened the door, took my hand, and helped me to my feet. His body pressed into mine, warm, hard, and comforting. I felt foolish for being so cynical all the time and always looking for holes in his story, or doubts about our relationship. “You hungry?” he whispered, his warm breath pushing against my neck.

“I am,” I smiled, and let him lead me into the small café.

I didn’t take any time with the menu, quickly ordering an egg white omelet loaded with veggies, wheat toast, and a small orange juice. Isaac looked impressed at my quick decision. I cringed as he ordered a large bowl of biscuits and gravy, stack of pancakes, and a side order of bacon. “You have to start eating healthier,” I insisted.

“There’s the old Maddie coming back,” he laughed.

It felt good to have these feelings. They were a great sign that my memories would soon return. It was a couple weeks until Christmas, and then I’d get to take my trip to Portland. I knew in my heart that the trip would bring me back from this blank mindset I’d been in for so long. It was the key to getting myself back.

“Did you book the flight yet?” I asked while my mind was on the topic.

“No,” he replied and gave me an apologetic look.

“When do you plan to do that?” I pushed, knowing if I didn’t stay on him, he’d never do it. Why didn’t he want to go to Portland? What was there that was scaring him so badly? Was it the man in my nightmare? Was he hiding the fact something horrible happened to me out of fear I couldn’t take it. I could take it. I am a big girl, and obviously I lived through whatever the horrible event was, so why hide it now?

The waitress brought our drinks and then disappeared back into the kitchen. My eyes were still glued to Isaac’s, waiting on the answer. “I’ll book them this afternoon,” he promised.

My lips stretched into a wide smile, grateful that he planned on keeping his word, and anxious about the upcoming trip. “I think this is all I need,” I blurted out eagerly.

He smiled, but his eyes shifted. Yes, there was something he didn’t want to face in Portland.

I asked about a couple of his cases, and he gave me vague details. One I found extremely interesting was the one where he was trying to catch a woman’s violent ex stalking her. “Aren’t you stalking her in order to track him?” I teased.

“Essentially, yes,” he laughed.

It was nice just to talk about normal things, things that normal people talk about. “Does Beth go on late night stakeouts with you?” I asked, suddenly experiencing a twinge of jealousy. Isaac smiled, his cheeks turning a light shade of red. “She has,” he admitted.

I didn’t like the feeling I was having. My gut twisted, and my eyes began to twitch. “There’s never been anything between us,” he quickly assured me.

My cheeks started to heat up as I realized how my jealousy must’ve been so visible to him. Am I a jealous person?

“I’m sorry,” I whispered as the waitress brought our meals. Isaac laughed and told me not to worry about it as he gripped the syrup container and began spilling it all over the cakes. Wow, he is not a healthy eater. “I’m going to have to break you of this eating style,” I teased.

“You’ve been trying for years,” he chuckled.

A flash opened in my mind, something new, not what I was shown in the pictures. Isaac was tall, blond, and wore a football jersey while I strolled beside him. The ground beneath our feet was dirt, and noise was everywhere, screaming, laughter, music, and loud bells. I closed my eyes to get a better view of this new image in my mind. A fair: we were at the fair. I couldn’t have been more than sixteen, and Isaac eighteen. “Your heart’s gonna clog with that,” I said with a snarky tone. Isaac laughed, turning his head towards me as he bit into the corn dog in his hand. “I have,” I sighed, opening my eyes to Isaac across the booth.

“You have what?” he asked confused.

I shared with him the memory I’d just had, and he quickly confirmed it was true. “That’s the summer before I took off to college,” he sighed.

A warm, comforting feeling fell over me as he talked about that day. Most of what he said was still lost on me, but some, some of it I could actually remember. “This is amazing,” I exclaimed.

“Yes, it is. See, the doctor told you it would start happening,” he smiled.

“Tell me more about our past together,” I pleaded.

Isaac shook his head. “I can’t interfere with your natural memories,” he insisted.

“This isn’t like telling me I like to mop the floor twice a day, or that I love baking apple pies so you can have a clean kitchen and a belly full,” I joked. My eyes pleaded with him, but he still said nothing.

I sighed. “These are real memories, and knowing more from you may help me to remember on my own,” I added.

Isaac was hesitant but finally gave in. He started back when we were super young, and my family moved in next door. “We used to use flashlights to signal each other at night,” he chuckled at the memory.

“What kind of signals?” I asked, eager to learn more about how close we’d been all these years.

“One flash was to say goodnight, two was to say meet me in the backyard, and three was to warn of a parent coming,” he explained.

I watched his eyes dance as he spoke. It was obvious those memories were very close to his heart. I felt a tug on my heart strings as he talked, simply from looking at the excitement in his eyes.

The waitress dropped our bill off at the table, and Isaac quickly took it. “I need to start working again,” I insisted.

“Not until you’re ready,” Isaac stated firmly.

“I’m ready,” I said, anxious to get out of the house all day. He chuckled and winked in my direction as he slid out of the booth. “Let’s get through the holidays, and then we’ll talk,” he smirked.

All these feelings were making me anxious; I didn’t know if I could wait until after the holidays. I wanted to go now, today.

“I promise, I’ll book the flight today,” he assured me.

Chapter Fifteen

Isaac

Beth was up my ass as soon as I walked into the office Monday morning. “You tell her yet?” she asked.

Damn, she nipped at my ankles like a small dog wanting attention as I made my way to my private office. “No,” I admitted, but didn’t want to indulge her on why.

“Isaac, you have to; things are going too far,” she insisted.

I knew that, I wasn’t an idiot, but I loved this woman with all my heart. “I can’t risk her getting hurt,” I snapped, moving towards my safe.

“You don’t think you lying to her all this time is going to hurt her?” she persuaded.

“I don’t trust this guy, Beth. He’s a bad man, and with the nightmares Maddie’s had, there’s no way I can allow her to run back to him,” I snarled.

Beth sat down in the chair facing my desk. She crossed her long legs, tapped her knee with perfectly manicured red nails, and pursed her lips into a pucker. “How are things going between you two?” she asked.

“They are going great actually,” I smiled, pulling Maddie’s phone from the safe.

“Has he called anymore?” she asked, motioning to the Motorola in my hand.

A green light flashed at the top of the phone, so I slid my thumb across the screen to see what message was waiting. My stomach churned as I noticed four more missed calls from Rob, and several texts begging for her to come back. “This guy isn’t going to leave her alone,” I sighed, sitting in my tall leather chair.

“What’s he saying?” Beth asked.

I handed her the phone and let her read the texts herself. Her nose crinkled as she stared at the screen, and then looked up at me. “Yes, he’s good,” she sighed, handing the phone back to me.

I clicked on the voicemails and let them play. His voice was sincere and filled with worry. “Baby, I know you wouldn’t just take off like this; please let me know you’re okay. I can’t sleep, I can’t eat. I just really need to hear your voice,” Rob pleaded on the phone.

“You think she wouldn’t buy into this?” I asked sarcastically.

Beth shook her head. “I always fell for it,” she admitted.

“Then you agree, I can’t tell her,” I growled.

“I didn’t say that. Maybe if you helped her remember on her own how bad this man is,” she suggested.

“She’s already remembering. Yesterday at breakfast, she had several breakthroughs remembering us as kids,” I sighed.

Yeah, she remembered. Fuck. Our time together is already shrinking.

Beth seemed excited about the memories, but I wasn’t so sure they were a good thing. I loved that she was remembering us, but that meant soon she’d remember him, and that there was no us at all.

“I booked us a flight to Portland for after Christmas,” I blurted.

Beth stared at me with her dark eyes, her lips still pursed together, and her chin shifting from side to side. “That’s a good plan,” she said with little confidence.

“Yeah, until she walks into her apartment and sees all the pictures of her and Rob,” I whined.

My head was spinning as I pictured the look of confusion on Maddie’s face when she realized we weren’t a couple and that I’d lied to her.

“Maybe she’ll remember how he hurt her once she sees his face,” Beth encouraged.

Maddie’s phone vibrated across my desk. I picked it up, seeing it was another call from Rob. “What am I going to do about this?” I asked, holding the phone up so Beth could see the name of the caller.

Her eyes widened and her head shook as she stared at me with dark eyes. “See if he left a voicemail,” she suggested after the ringing stopped for a minute.

I hit voicemail, and of course, he’d left another one. “Maddie, or whoever the fuck this is, I need someone to answer me. Your landlord said some man was paying your rent; where the hell are you, and who is this man? Are you safe? Please tell me you’re safe, or I’m coming to find you, and whoever this is that’s holding you against your will,” Rob’s voice threatened through the phone.

His threats made me uneasy, mainly because I knew if the cops got involved, I’d be thrown in jail. “I can’t let him find her,” I told Beth.

“You can’t let him find her, or you,” she stated.

I knew that was a true statement.

“What do I do?” I asked.

Beth reached up from her seat and snatched the phone from my hand. “There’s only one way to handle this guy,” she said, opening the text box.

“I’ll send him a text from Maddie,” she added.

I walked behind her so I could see what she typed.

Maddie: Rob, leave me alone, I am safe.

Rob: Where are you?

Maddie: With friends.

Rob: Who? Is this even Maddie?

Maddie: Rob, please, leave me alone. I don’t want to talk to you or see you.

Rob: Who’s paying your rent, and why aren’t you paying it yourself?

Maddie: That’s none of your business.

Rob: If this is really Maddie, tell me where we met.

“Do you know where they met?” Beth asked me.

My heart raced, realizing it wasn’t going to be easy to get rid of this man. I shut my eyes, trying hard to remember all the comments and posts that Maddie had on her Facebook. “Dori’s Ice Cream Parlor!” I exclaimed.

Maddie: Dori’s Ice Cream Parlor.

Beth looked relieved as she sent the text. “That should prove to him that it’s her, she sighed.

Rob: This isn’t Maddie. I’m coming to find you!

I took the phone from Beth and turned it off before putting it back into my safe. “Do you think he can find her?” Beth asked.

“I don’t know,” I sighed.

I didn’t know. Anything was possible. Fuck. That was my job, to find people who didn’t want to be found, and to expose secrets that had been so skillfully hidden. There were lots of guys like me in the field, and if he found a good one, then yeah, Maddie would be found, and so would I.

“I can’t tell her now,” I groaned.

“No, you can’t,” Beth agreed.

My phone started ringing, reminding me that I had a job to do. Beth left my office, and I answered. It was Paul Gallo, one of my highest profile clients. He used to be in the mob, when the mob was cool, and now retired. He spent his days at a swanky country club next to the pool. He went through women like crazy, all way too young for him, and all out to get their hands on his fortune. He used me to find out the dirt on them before he got too close. So far, he hadn’t been able to get too close to anyone, but this one he was really hoping was different. “She’s older,” he said proudly on the other end of my phone. His usual girlfriends were always in their early to mid-twenties. “She’s thirty-three,” he added, almost causing me to choke on the laughter I swallowed.

He went on to tell me that he had a big New Year’s planned for her, a ring that he’d offer to her to become his wife, but before that, he needed to be sure she was the one. I hesitated, knowing that I promised to take Maddie to Portland right after Christmas. I knew that Beth could handle the case without my help, but I also knew it might be a great excuse for me to postpone the trip. “I’ll handle it,” I agreed.

I called Beth into my office and explained that Mr. Gallo needed surveillance on his new love interest. “It must be done before New Year’s,” I sighed with a fake exhaustion.

“I can handle it, so it shouldn’t interrupt your plans with Maddie,” she offered eagerly.

“He can be a tricky client. He likes having me on call,” I argued.

“You’re trying to get out of this trip, aren’t you?” she smirked.

She knew me too well. I fought back my grin and swallowed the lump in my throat, the one I got when I lied. “He’s a huge client,” I explained.

“Understandable, but this is Maddie’s life we’re talking about. You can’t keep putting her recovery on hold,” she lectured. “The longer you do, it seems more likely that you only worried about your own feelings, not hers,” she added with a stiff frown following her statement.

“Okay. Here’s the file. You can work on it this week, but if things become overwhelming, or Mr. Gallo so much as scoffs at the fact you’re working the case and not me, I’m postponing the trip,” I insisted.

“Fair enough. So, that frees up your day tomorrow; why don’t you take Maddie to do something fun?” she suggested.

“She used to love antiquing; at least she did when we were in high school. There is a huge antique flea market shop not far from here, and a new beach to experience,” I smiled.

Yes, I liked that idea. I’d take Maddie to do something fun and create new memories for her, for us.

“Have you decided what to get her for Christmas?” Beth asked.

I leaned back into my chair, the leather squeaking as I adjusted my hips. I pulled my arms over my head, crossed them, and intertwined my fingers as I thought about her question. I hadn’t thought about what to get Maddie for Christmas. It would be our first real Christmas together, and, most likely, our last. I knew it had to be something sentimental, something that would show I knew her, truly knew her. But the truth was, I didn’t really know much about her since she graduated college. It would have to be something from her past, something that would help her to connect back to who she was, but not trigger her memories of who she’d become.

“I’ll think of something,” I smiled.

Chapter Sixteen

Maddie

Isaac gripped my waist, his fingers working furiously tickling my sides. “Stop it!” I giggled excitedly. My cheeks hurt from laughing so hard, and he was relentless, obviously loving the fact he had me so giddy.

Finally, he stopped, his body pressing its weight onto me, my back sinking into the plush mattress. My sides were sore, but my cheeks ever sorer from the laughter. His beautiful green eyes glistened like jewels from the sunlight entering our room. Our room. That was the first time I’d referred to it that way. It felt good. It felt natural.

“You’re going to be late for work,” I said softly, our lips so close I knew my breath tickled his skin when I spoke. His eyes narrowed, and his smile widened as his hands moved back to my sides. “No, please,” I cried out joyfully. “You love to torture me, Isaac Lewis,” I scolded with a playful tone.

His fingers lingered on my sides, my extremely sore sides. He didn’t touch me, didn’t tickle, but instead lowered his lips onto mine and kissed me passionately. I melted into the mattress, no longer worried about the threat his fingers made on my side. His tongue rolled across my lips, parting them gently, and then entered my mouth. My entire body reacted to the kiss, to the passion it embodied. I was falling for this man, and for the second time, I giggled. I’d been wishing desperately to remember the past, but at that moment, for the first time, I was glad I couldn’t. It was nice to experience all these firsts with Isaac, even if they weren’t truly firsts. They felt good. They felt amazing.

My arms wrapped gently around his neck, pulling myself up and into him so my tongue could push deep into his mouth. I don’t know how I ever doubted this man’s honesty.

“Seriously, you’re going to be late,” I whispered as our kiss ended.

“I’m not going in today,” he smirked.

My legs wrapped around his waist and back, clamping together at the ankles. I had him locked in, unable to escape, but he didn’t seem to mind. He rolled his body, so hard, with his hands gripped to my waist. In a quick rush, I was on top of him, and he beneath me. “I want you,” he whispered.

Our eyes were locked onto one another’s, and now my pussy pressed against his erection. I wanted him too. “There’s a condom in the nightstand drawer,” he instructed.

I leaned over, opening the drawer, and pulled out a condom from a fresh, unopened box. I tore it open as Isaac slid his pants down while bucking me with his hips. I slid down to his legs, staring at the large, veiny muscle between his thighs. My mouth watered as I lowered myself for just a quick taste. My body was hungry for him to be inside of me, and I wasn’t willing to waste much time on foreplay. We were both already excited, his cock rock hard, and my pussy dripping with juices. My lips pressed tightly around the tip of his cock, and I sucked hard as I lowered down his shaft. My cheeks sucked in, creating the suction needed to make him groan. A loud pop noise sounded as I released his cock from my mouth. I looked up at him, smiled, and loved seeing the passion and desire on his face.

“You want me to do it?” he asked, motioning to the condom.

“No,” I breathed.

I wasn’t as experienced as I thought I would be, taking several attempts to get the latex protection unrolled down his shaft.

I stood up on the bed, my feet on either side of his body. I slid my panties off from under my night shirt, and then pulled it off as well, giving him a beautiful view of my nude body.

His eyes lingered where my legs parted, causing my pussy to twitch with excitement. I lowered back down, his hands immediately cupping my small breasts as I positioned his erection between my swollen pussy lips.

My body was already well lubricated, and sliding easily with my weight onto his shaft. I let out a moan, my eyes rolled back into my head, and I called out his name as he filled me.

I loved watching his lips part, his chest rise and drop so rapidly, and his eyes fill with what I assumed was love, admiration, appreciation, maybe. I bounced up and down, his hands on my hips guiding me to a steady rhythm. My hand reached behind me, grabbing his balls, and held them in my palm. I worked my fingers through the loose flesh, massaging until it began to tighten.

My motions altered to a rock, grinding my clit against his pelvis. The friction it created, along with the fullness of his cock inside of me, worked up an orgasm quickly.

It was obvious that Isaac wasn’t far behind, his breathing becoming sporadic, his eyes rolling back, and his bucking becoming faster and deeper. Deep growls rolled through his throat and out of his lips as my orgasm exploded into wild pulsations around his thick member. I continued to rock against him, feeling as if my orgasm would never end due to the friction. His hands gripped my hips firmly, stopping further torture as his body stiffened beneath me, and the words “I love you” were mumbled, almost to an unrecognizable state.

My heart swelled. I loved him too. At least I thought I did, but I couldn’t bring myself to say it, not until I was sure. I fell onto him, letting my weight push down his chest, and enjoyed his arms around me while his cock stayed situated in my warm hole.

This is what sex should feel like. I knew that, even if I couldn’t remember sex at all with anyone else, including Isaac.

“What a wonderful way to start our day of fun and adventure,” Isaac whispered in my ear.

“Day of fun and adventure?” I questioned.

“Oh yeah. I have an entire day planned for us,” he smiled.

My heart swelled with excitement as I slid from his arms and to my feet. “I need to shower,” I exclaimed, rushing to the bathroom to clean up. I needed this so badly; he probably had no idea just how badly.

This house, as lovely as it was, just didn’t feel like home. I knew I had a week and a half to get ready for my Portland trip, but until then, I wanted to try everything to bring back my memories of this sweet and wonderful man.

The warm water flowed from the faucet down my face, my shoulders, and belly. My eyes closed as the streams of water blasted onto my skin, and my thoughts were focused on the memories that Isaac and I had already created. I was thankful for them, for him.

Strong arms slid around my waist, startling me at first. Isaac chuckled as he pulled me into his chest, my back taking in the warmth of his smooth skin. He gripped the loofah, added body wash, and instead of using to wash himself, he carefully, gently, and sensually washed me. The feeling of being pampered was opening my heart even more to him. Yes, I was falling.

By the time Isaac had washed me, carefully dried me, and carried me in his strong arms to the bed, I was ready to give up on the trip outside of the house I had so eagerly anticipated and just stay in the bed with him making love all day.

He leaned over me, his damp body dripping onto mine. Our lips met, our tongues entangled, and my body tingled with desire as he pulled back quickly.

“Oh no, we have plans,” he smirked.

“Tease,” I laughed.

He winked in my direction and then dropped his towel to the floor. His manhood was half-hard, still impressive, and made me want to cancel the plans even more so than before. I opened mine, displayed my own nude body and grinned as my legs parted for his peering eyes.

“Who’s the tease now?” he chuckled.

“I’m not teasing,” I winked.

His eyes were filled with hunger, and I knew it was killing him not to touch me, taste me, fuck me. But, he didn’t. He tossed a throw blanket over me and laughed.

“You really don’t want to spend the day out in public with me that bad?” he joked.

“Of course not,” I protested.

“Get dressed then,” he ordered.

He disappeared into the walk-in closet where I could hear his shuffling through hangers to find something to wear. “What should I wear?” I called to him.

“Something comfortable, and pack a bikini,” he ordered.

Ugh! A day on the beach wasn’t exactly what I would call a day out. The beach was right here, just footsteps from our back door. I’d spent plenty of my downtime there, and I was growing bored with it.

I didn’t complain, but instead dressed in a cute yellow sundress with tiny blue flowers and sandals. My bikini was underneath, eliminating the need to change when we hit the beach. My belly grumbled. I was starving, so I hoped he had planned a meal before he shoved me in the sand.

Isaac exited his closet wearing a bright blue polo shirt that brought out the brightness in his green eyes, a pair of light tan khaki shorts, and sandals. 

“You ready?” he asked. I nodded, wrapping my hair into a tight ponytail on the back of my head. “I’ve never known a woman who could look as good as you with so little effort,” he complimented.

I realized I wasn’t wearing any makeup, but my complexion didn’t require it. I smiled at his sweetness, and then let him lead me from the room to the front door.

“I’m starving,” he grumbled.

Oh, thank God! I am too.

He helped me into the Escalade, the giant gas guzzling truck he just had to have. We drove off towards town but didn’t stop as we passed by all the shops, diners, and restaurants lining the main road. “Where are we going?” I asked.

“Somewhere different,” he smiled without offering any further detail.

I leaned back in the seat and listened to the radio while classical music played and soothed my soul. I didn’t care where we went, not really, just as long as I was out of that house and spending my day with Isaac. Something was bound to trigger a memory.

“Are we there yet?” I asked like a little kid on their first road trip.

“Almost,” he assured me, but then drove another twenty-five minutes before taking an exit from the highway.

He pulled into a gravel parking lot with a large sign announcing their oysters were fresh. “What is this place?” I asked hesitantly.

“You’ll love it. You’ve been here before,” he smiled.

The thought of visiting a place I’d actually been to before intrigued me. I got out of the truck, not waiting for Isaac to help me, and just stood there, trying to remember. Nothing was familiar, at least not yet. I had hope, and I knew something would trigger a memory here for sure. It had to.

Isaac held my hand, his palm sweaty like he was nervous. He guided me to the front door, where he held it open for me. The cool breeze from the large wicker fans above and the ocean that touched their open patio was refreshing. Isaac made a point of insisting we sit on the deck, at a particular table he said we shared once before. “Only once?” I asked.

He nodded.

“Why, did I not like it?” I giggled, wondering why we wouldn’t have visited every time I was in town if it was something I enjoyed.

“You loved it,” he assured me.

The thought of eating raw oysters left me in a confused state of mind. A part of me leaned towards ordering them as an appetizer, but another said no. Did I like them or not? Isaac wouldn’t say.

“Just try them. Order what your first instincts are, and if you don’t like it, we’ll try something else,” he suggested.

The waitress showed up at our table. Her hair was dark brown and kept in two neat and tight braids that hung down the side of her head. Her nametag said Sandy, and her smile said she was ready for us to order. “I’ll have a Corona with lime, oyster appetizer to start, grilled shrimp, and a spinach salad,” I said without hesitation. Isaac’s eyes widened, looking as impressed as I was that I ordered so easily.

Isaac ordered a little healthier than usual, requesting the salmon with garlic butter, a side salad, and long grain rice. “You don’t have to eat that if you don’t want to,” I assured him, feeling guilty for passing my views onto him, if they even were my true views.

“I eat healthy sometimes,” he insisted, to which I couldn’t help but laugh.

“I do,” he whined without any ability to convince me. I’d watched him eat, and I knew he was partial to fried foods and snacks.

A large blue boat rode by in the water, the loud exhaust catching my eye. I stared out onto the ocean, watching the boat with an intense focus.

“I was here,” I whispered, remembering sitting on this patio with Isaac. I turned to him, his smile wide, his eyes even wider. “I remember having lunch with you here,” I exclaimed, nearly jumping from my seat. It may have been a small thing to remember, but to me, it was huge. It was a sign that I would get my memories back, that they werent lost forever like I feared. “We had oysters, and you gagged when I made you try one,” I boasted.

“Yes, I remember,” Isaac said as he wrinkled his nose.

Omg, all these weeks of fearing that Isaac was somehow lying to me, manipulating me. I felt horribly guilty.

Our food arrived at the table and I devoured it with a wild hunger. It wasn’t that I was starving that badly; it was more that I knew I liked it. I knew I’d had it before. I remembered.

“I have another surprise for you before we hit the beach,” Isaac said, but wouldn’t tell me what.

I was excited to visit another place, hopefully where I’d have more memories. He took my hand and led me to the truck, helping me inside. He didn’t speak as he slid into the driver’s seat, only smiled and then pulled back onto the road. We drove another fifteen miles or so along the ocean shore. He pulled into an antique mall, then turned to me and smiled.

“Do you remember this place?” he asked.

I didn’t. But, I wasn’t going to get discouraged.

Inside the large flea market-style building with long corridors filled with antiques and vintage items, the smell reminded me of something familiar, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. Isaac let me wander while he followed beside me, stopping at several of the shops to browse through the offerings.

“You loved antiquing,” he told me.

I believed him. This place had a strange hold on me, a tug and a pull that I couldn’t deny. I stopped at a jewelry shop, admiring the beautiful rings. The one on my finger was new, modern, and larger than my thin finger could really handle. I wondered why he’d chosen that ring and not a vintage one that I admired through the glass counter.

“Would you like to try one on?” the woman running the shop asked eagerly.

I shook my head, my cheeks turning pink from embarrassment. “Go ahead,” Isaac encouraged.

I pointed into the case to a beautiful tanzanite ring; it was on a split-shank white gold setting and even though the stone was larger than the one I wore, it was more delicate. I loved the detail of the vintage ring, and for some reason, the stone drew me to it like a magnet.

“Beautiful choice,” the woman said, reaching into the case for the ring. “Is this your birthstone?” she asked.

“I don’t know,” I uttered, seriously lost on the answer to her simple question.

“When is your birthday dear?” she asked.

“November,” I replied.

I took the ring from her hand and slipped it on my ring finger next to the modern one I wore. It was a perfect fit. I absolutely loved it.

“Here,” she said, pointing to a large yellow topaz ring in a beautiful setting. “This is November’s birthstone.”

The ring was pretty, and I loved the vintage setting, but it didn’t appeal to me like the other. “I just love the blue,” I gushed, holding the ring towards the light to watch it sparkle. Isaac was quiet, not showing much interest in my enthusiasm, and after looking at the price tag on the ring I had tried on, I lost some of my enthusiasm as well. Guilt fell over me as I realized he must be hurt that I even entertained the notion of trying on another engagement ring, let alone actually getting it. He probably worked hard to find the perfect ring for me, even though looking at it, it didn’t feel perfect.

“I love the ring I have, but it is beautiful,” I said, handing the ring back to the lady behind the counter.

We continued searching through the shops, and as we approached the last one in the long corridor we’d chosen to explore, I stopped at one that sold dolls. They were everywhere, hanging from the ceiling, lined on shelves, sitting in old-fashioned rockers and antique cradles. They gave me the creeps with their glass eyes and stiff hair, but something pulled me into the shop anyways.

“Oh my God,” I exclaimed, picking up a large porcelain doll with matted white hair and blue glass eyes. “I remember this doll,” I sighed.

“That was in your house, along with a dozen other freaky-looking dolls,” Isaac said with a chuckle.

“It was?” I gasped, unable to put her down even though she gave me the chills.

“Yes. Your grandmother collected old dolls, clocks, bird feeders, and about everything else,” he laughed.

“She was a hoarder?” I asked.

“An eccentric collector,” he smirked.

My grandmother’s face flashed through my mind, clear as a movie still. Her thin gray hair looked like a baby bird’s feathers before they fully formed, her face so wrinkled you could barely see her face structure, and bright blue eyes that were full of love. Tears began rolling down my cheeks.

“Excuse me,” I apologized to Isaac as I headed into the ladies room.

My breathing was heavy and labored as I tried to pull myself together. I pulled a couple towels from the dispenser and wiped my eyes. The feeling was so fresh, so new, it was like I’d lost my grandmother all over again.

“Do you care if we go?” I asked Isaac, who stood at the exit door waiting for me patiently.

“Of course,” he said sweetly, slipping his hand in mine. Our fingers entangled and warmth rushed over me. I was so thankful for him. And, now that I’d started to remember again, I could remember how much I loved him as a friend, so it was no wonder I fell in love with him as a lover as well.

Isaac drove us to a secluded beach where we walked the shore, letting the cold water nip at our bare feet while carrying our shoes. I picked up seashells as we talked, reminiscing about the past, my family, and our friendship. Some of the memories he shared left me feeling lost, but some, some I could actually remember, if not the entire scenario, at least a feeling of familiarity.

On our drive home, I was on cloud nine. I leaned back in the plush leather seat and stared out the window, watching everything pass by so quickly.

The truck stopped at a red light next to a tall brick building. Anxiety rushed over me in a panic as I stared at the building, picturing me walking down the sidewalk next to a building just like that one. I was angry, I could feel it, and a little scared. My gut twisted in knots as the emotions flooded over me as if I were happening in that moment. A man, the one from my nightmare jerked my arm, pulling me back and causing me to lose my balance. I fell to the ground and he raised his hand and slapped me hard in the face. It was the same man from my previous nightmares. I knew him, at least it felt like I did, but why was he hurting me?

“What’s wrong?” Isaac asked as he pulled through the green light.

Tears fell violently down my cheeks as I began to sob uncontrollably. I couldn’t speak. Isaac pulled over into the parking lot, a pizza place, and the smell was making me sick.

“What’s wrong?” he asked again, his voice filled with panic.

“I was attacked, wasn’t I?” I sniffled. Isaac’s eyes filled with fear, and he didn’t answer, leading me to believe he was hiding the truth. I needed the truth; it was my truth. “Wasn’t I?” I shouted.

“Yes,” he finally answered in a weak voice.

“Why wouldn’t you tell me that?” I screamed.

“Why would I? It would only hurt you. If it were up to me, you’d never remember it,” he defended.

“But, the nightmares. You knew I was having them, and you didn’t tell me what they meant,” I argued. He said nothing.

“Take me home,” I demanded.

“Of course,” Isaac agreed and pulled the truck back onto the road. Home. I don’t even know where that is.

Chapter Seventeen

Isaac

Maddie still wasn’t up, having slept from the time we arrived home the night before. Things had gone so well, and she was so happy; why did that memory have to surface? All of the abuse she suffered was in Portland, not here. That fucking brick building just had to be on the corner where the longest red light existed. Fuck!

It felt like I couldn’t catch a break. Every time things started to go well between Maddie and me, something would fuck it up.

My size-twelve shoe was still kicking myself in the ass for admitting she’d been hurt. I knew her memories were getting clearer, and it would only be a matter of time before she remembered everything. I should’ve just told her everything right then, while she was already upset, and explain that I was protecting her, but I didn’t. Dumbass!

I hated that she slept in the guest room last night, and not in my arms. I reached for the blanket she’d tossed from her body and placed it back up around her neck. As I leaned down to kiss her on the cheek, she groaned and flipped to her other side.

I’d told Beth to stay in the office and handle the paperwork and phones while I trailed Mr. Gallo’s latest love interest. Beth said her day trailing her was pretty boring. She shopped a lot, spent a couple hours in the salon, and then picked up her poodle from the groomers before heading to Mr. Gallo’s estate. “She seems to be clean,” Beth said, never wanting to think a woman could be as cold and calculated as a man.

I snuck out of the room, carefully not to wake her, and headed to work. Mr. Gallo gave me her schedule for that morning, so I rushed to the country club where Mr. Gallo had given me an all-access pass as an elite guest. I was to order anything I wanted, participate in any services offered that would give me a closer look at his new love, Tatiana, a thirty-three-year-old retired stripper who worked as an escort for wealthy older men before she lucked into meeting Paul Gallo, one of the wealthiest men in Miami. Her background was rough, but I wasn’t going to go into it with pre-judgment. I was simply going to do my job.

The place was swanky, way fancier than any place I’d been to before. I wore a jacket and tie, as requested by Mr. Gallo, so at least I felt like I fit in well enough, as long as I didn’t speak too much.

I wandered through the large lobby and took a seat in the dining room. Tatiana was seated just a few feet from me, giving me access to any conversation she might have with whoever joined her. According to Mr. Gallo, she was meeting girlfriends, like she did every Wednesday. I ordered a glass of Scotch and the lobster tail because, hey, why not? And then watched the room as different people wandered in and out.

After two drinks, my meal and Tatiana’s companion arrived. He was tall, good looking, and much younger than Mr. Gallo: probably younger than Tatiana as well. He scooted his seat next to hers so they could share the same side of the table. They didn’t kiss, touch, or do anything inappropriate, but then again, they were in a very public place that Tatiana’s soon-to-be fiancé frequented.

I couldn’t hear what they were saying, but they did quite a bit of laughing. She was a pretty woman, but obviously one that’d lived a rough life. Her hair was long, red, and curly, her breasts most likely fake and her best asset, but she knew how to charm a man, which was clear by the way this tool looked at her. He was under her spell.

My meal arrived, and I worked on pulling the meat from the shell as I continued to keep an eye on the intimate, yet discreet couple.

My phone vibrated in my pocket as I fumbled to retrieve it. Beth’s name was on the screen. What the hell does she want? She knows I’m on a stakeout. I hit ignore and figured she would text if it was something serious, or at the very least, leave a voicemail.

The happy couple finished their small plate of appetizers and started to leave when my phone rang again. Beth again; what the fuck?

“Excuse me, I have to go,” I flagged down a server. He smiled, nodded and started to walk away. “Isn’t there a check I need to pay?” I asked, figuring Mr. Gallo would just reimburse me.

The man looked offended that I would ask such a horrid question. What’s up his ass? “No, sir. The bill is discretely charged to your account. Mr. Gallo’s elite guest, correct?” his tone was snobbish, even though he was offering to free me from the enormous bill.

I didn’t wait around for him to give me any more lectures about the high society life. Okay, I get. They have tons of money but don’t talk about it. It was like it was dirty to handle actual cash, it was all done through accounts. Ugh!

I scooted from the table and rushed towards the long hall where Tatiana and her friend disappeared to. Several doors mocked me, laughing at me as I didn’t know which one to take. I pushed through the left one and entered a large indoor Olympic swimming pool. I came back out and took the right one and entered a large sauna room where several wrinkly old men were exposing more than just their layers of flabby muscle.

Finally, I pushed out the main door and entered a large patio. I noticed Tatiana and her friend on the long staircase leading to the tennis courts when my phone rang again. Seriously?

I reached into my pocket and slid my finger across the screen to answer Beth’s third call. “What?” I snapped.

“It’s Maddie,” Beth said, her tone serious and filled with stress.

I stopped on the stairs, letting Tatiana and her friend out of my sight. My heart raced. She knows? She fucking knows? Now what?

“She’s really upset, and I can’t calm her down,” Beth sighed with exhaustion.

Fuck!

Sweat beaded up on my forehead, and my fists became clammy. I didn’t know what to do, what to say. I wasn’t even sure if I wanted to see her, not if she knew I was a liar, not if she hated me.

“Are you there?” Beth asked.

I paused and then sighed. “Yeah, I’m here,” I said quickly.

“You need to come calm her down. She passed the accident site on her walk to the office and is hysterical,” Beth asserted.

“Yes. I ju-just, I’ll be there in ten minutes,” I blubbered.

Thank God it wasn’t that her memory was back. I wasn’t ready to face that reality just yet. My heart raced as I stretched my neck down the stairs to try to spot Tatiana. She was on the tennis courts, her tall, dark friend with helping her with a backswing. Fuck. I had to go.

I rushed back to the office through thick traffic and road work. Fifteen minutes had passed when I finally arrived, and I feared that Maddie was going to be upset I wasn’t there.

“Where is she?” I yelled towards Beth when I walked into the office. She pointed to my office where Maddie sat in my chair. I rushed in, stopped at the desk, and stared into her beautiful blue eyes. They were bloodshot, a little puffy from where she’d been crying, but still just as breathtaking. I watched her sob and waited for a reaction, possibly one of anger, that maybe she remembered. “I’m sorry,” she cried.

I rushed to her side, holding her in my arms. “No. Don’t be sorry,” I assured her, wiping the tears from her cheeks. Her arms clung onto me, wrapping around me tightly as she continued to sob. For what felt like an eternity, but was moments in reality, she cried in my arms, breaking my heart that she was in so much pain.

“What happened?” I asked as she finally started to pull away.

“The accident. I remembered right before I got hit. We were running, and you were exhausted,” she giggled through her sniffles. “I had my phone and wallet in my hand,” she said.

“They never found them,” I lied to her. There I go again, lying to the woman I love.

“But, I know I had them,” she insisted.

She wasn’t wrong. She did have them both. The pthone was just a few feet from her, locked in my safe, and her wallet was with it, hidden to avoid her finding out her real last name. “I have to go find them,” she insisted, getting up from the chair.

She rushed towards the door as I grabbed her arm, pulling her back. “I can’t let you go back there. It’s been weeks. If anything was there, it’s long gone now. I don’t want you reliving that experience again.”

She jerked her arm free from my loose grip and ran from the office with me right behind her. I chased her down three blocks, and then caught up to her at the light where we’d waited before she was hit. “Right there,” she gasped. “Right there is where it happened.

I nodded. “Yes, but the cops scoured the area for your belongings,” I assured her, which was the truth. I’d scooped up the phone and wallet before they’d seen it.

“I have to find it,” she cried, rushing across the street as soon as the light changed. My heart raced watching her walk the same path that nearly killed her. When she made it to the other side, the most amazing relief fell over me. She walked up and down the street, checking the curb and then stopping at a drain vent. “It could’ve fallen down here,” she insisted, laying on her belly to try and look into the dark hole. “I can’t see anything,” she growled.

“The only thing down there is rats,” I stated.

“I have to find it,” she cried.

“Why?” I asked, gripping her arm as she stood. She wasn’t in her right mind; something had caused her to walk to the office, so she was already triggered by emotion once she noticed the street where she was hit.

“Calm down,” I ordered in a stern voice. Her big blue eyes widened as she stared into mine.

“I have to find it,” she said softly as I walked her to a nearby city bus bench. She sat, her breathing labored, and her stress elevating with each moment she didn’t have her phone in her hand. “It could help me figure out who I am,” she explained.

Yes, it could. That was why I’ve kept it hidden.

“I don’t think the phone would be able to tell you much,” I assured her.

“It could tell me who I talked to, what we talked about, show my appointments, tell me who Rob is and why that name means something, and maybe there is a picture of the man who attacked me, the one from my dream,” she rattled.

All of those things were true, but I couldn’t risk her finding out this way. “I know I knew him,” she sighed.

“Let’s go home,” I suggested, gripping her hand in mine.

“And, my wallet. I’m sure I had credit cards, my license, and all that has to be replaced,” she gasped.

“I canceled all your cards, and we’ll get you a new license when you’re fully healed,” I promised. She stared at me, looking completely unconvinced.

“Let’s go,” I urged.

I stood, still gripping her hand in mine, and asked her to please come home with me. She stood, immediately pushed into my chest, and hugged me tightly. “I’m so sorry, Isaac,” she sniffled.

“Why are you sorry?” I questioned, pulling from her embrace to look into her bloodshot eyes.

“I just wanted to come find you at work, to tell you I remembered,” she babbled.

“Remembered?” I asked carefully.

“I remembered something about us,” she sighed.

I held my breath, not intentionally, but I couldn’t breathe. What did she remember?

“I remembered senior prom, when you asked me to dance. We weren’t together, but I remembered I wished you’d asked me instead of Sara Humphrey,” she said so sweetly.

“I didn’t think you liked me in that way; we were friends,” I blurted. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I don’t know,” she replied. “I mean, I really don’t know. That’s all I remember. We were at the prom, and you were dancing with Sara, and I was jealous. I could feel the powerful emotion in my gut as if I were standing there at that very moment,” she revealed.

Wow, Maddie Stewart had feelings for me. I had no idea. I wish I’d known.

“I’m starting to remember,” she beamed.

“That’s amazing,” I gasped, gripping her tight in my arms.

It was amazing, and I was truly happy for Maddie, but that feeling of loss lingered in my soul. Once she remembered everything, this would all be over. Knowing that she had feelings for me all those years I’d pined for her didn’t make this any easier.

Chapter Eighteen

Maddie

All these emotions flooded through my veins like a drug I craved more and more. I wanted more triggers, needed more. Isaac had to understand the importance of my visit to Portland by now for sure. I pulled from his arms, staring up at him with pouty eyes and smiled. “So, when we get to Portland, I have a good feeling that my memories will all return,” I boasted.

“Don’t be disappointed if they don’t,” he warned.

I watched his eye twitch and knew there was something bothering him. It couldn’t be that I was remembering again, could it? Was he hiding something from me?

“I wish I had my phone,” I sighed, knowing that any secrets he may have been hiding from me would surely be revealed with it in my possession.

“We’ll get you a new phone this week,” he promised.

“Okay,” I sighed, not willing to argue about the topic any longer. He didn’t understand. It wasn’t that I didn’t have a phone; it was that I didn’t have my phone.

“Shouldn’t my new credit cards be delivered by now?” I asked.

“They probably went to your address in Portland,” he quickly replied.

“Oh,” I smiled, not pleased with the response. Why wouldn’t he have had them sent here? And why wouldn’t he have let me talk to the credit card companies myself?

“Christmas is only a week away. You can get all your mail then,” Isaac smiled.

One week: that wasn’t long, but to me, it felt like an eternity.

“I would like to have lunch with Beth,” I blurted, changing the topic quickly. I was exhausted talking about the trip that seemed to be eons away, and the phone I’d probably never see again.

“Beth? Why?” he asked, his eyebrow lifting high on his forehead as he spoke.

“I like her, and she was so sweet to me today,” I explained.

She was very attentive, and I could feel the empathy oozing from her veins. I was hysterical, and she calmed me down, helped my panic attack subside, and for some strange reason, I felt a connection with her.

“Beth and I don’t have a social relationship; it’s strictly business,” he commented.

“That’s you and Beth; this is me and Beth,” I stood my ground.

“Okay, if you would like to, I’m sure she would love to spend some time with you. She’s asked a million questions about how you’ve been doing,” he caved.

A smile slid across my face. It was nice to think I may be able to make a friend. I still didn’t understand why I didn’t have any in the first place. I didn’t seem to be a reserved or private person, and I certainly didn’t like spending so much time alone.

“I’m sorry I pulled you from your work,” I apologized, realizing that Isaac had said he was working with a high-profile client.

“It’s okay. I wasn’t going to find anything today anyhow,” he smiled, pulling me into his arms.

His chest was so hard, so tight, that it made me feel secure against it. His arms tightened around me, and I could feel his breath on my neck as he moved his lips in to nuzzle me. I giggled. It tickled, but felt good.

“Let’s go to bed,” he whispered in my ear.

I didn’t hesitate to respond with a tight squeeze around his waist. I lifted up to my toes and kissed his warm lips.

His squeeze around me tightened, and soon my feet were no longer on the floor. He pulled me into his arms, lifting me into a cradled position, and carried me to the bedroom.

I stared into his eyes, feeling warmth and honesty flow from them and penetrate my soul. It was no wonder I’d fallen in love with this man. It was no wonder I’d fallen in love with him as just a boy.

Chapter Nineteen

Isaac

I followed Tatiana most of my morning, and part of my afternoon. She wasn’t up to anything shady that I could see, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t. In my line of work, I learned quickly that things are not always what they seemed.

Beth pulled my arm hard, guiding me into my office as I returned from my day of surveillance.

“You can’t let this go on,” she hissed.

Her dark eyes were black as coal, and her red lips stretched so tight they nearly fell from the side of her face.

“What are you talking about?” I asked, even though I knew exactly what she was talking about.

“Her memories are getting stronger,” she warned.

Yeah, tell me something I don’t already know. That was partly why I hadn’t told her yet. I wasn’t ready for this to end, and I couldn’t bear to see her go back to Rob, the man who would only hurt her again and again.

She didn’t have any other close friends because of him so when he hit her again, who would she run to, and where would she go?

“I have the trip planned for Portland after Christmas,” I insisted. “As long as I can break this case for Mr. Gallo before then,” I added.

“Christmas is in three days,” Beth snapped.

And her real birthday in only five. We’d be in Portland on her birthday, probably right when she realized I’d lied to her all this time.

“If there’s no break in the case, I’ll handle it; you can’t push this back any longer,” she demanded.

I agreed and smiled. “I appreciate your concern, but I have it handled,” I convinced.

Beth shook her head and sighed. She obviously didn’t think I had it handled at all. “Maddie said she wanted to have lunch with you soon. She was very appreciative of the way you helped her the other day,” I interjected.

“That’s sweet. I’d like that,” Beth beamed.

“But, you have to promise me you won’t tell her anything,” I ordered.

“You know I wouldn’t do that to you,” she promised. “But, you have to promise me you’ll take her to Portland right after Christmas as planned, no matter what,” she added.

I didn’t want to make that promise. I wanted the excuse, just in case. What if something happened between now and then? Anything could happen. Her memories were becoming stronger and clearer. What if her memories allowed her to remember the love she had for Rob, and not the fear, disgust, or anger? Would all the texts, emails, and phone calls from her call log be enough to stop her from going back to him. I assumed she’d deleted texts and emails between me and her to avoid being busted before she was able to get a ticket and fly out here to me.

“Promise me,” Beth demanded, her lips pursing together.

“I promise,” I caved again.

“Have you found her anything for Christmas yet?” I nodded; I had, and for her birthday as well. Beth’s eyes lit up with excitement, waiting on me to show it to her. “What is it?” she pleaded.

Being a detective, I knew she hated surprises and being left out of anything, just like I did. But, these were two very special gifts. The one for Christmas would offer Maddie a connection to her past she’d been craving, and the one for her birthday would offer a link to her future, should she choose to be with me. I was pleased with my decisions, and I knew she’d love them both. The only problem with her birthday was, we’d be in Portland, and she may not want to speak to me ever again, or accept any gift I had to offer.

“You’ll have to wait,” I smirked, know it was killing her.

Beth rolled her eyes in frustration as she gave up on pushing for details any further. She knew I was a stubborn man, and she’d never get it out of me. “I’ll take over the Gallo case tonight,” she offered.

“Thank you,” I smiled. I was eager to get home to Maddie and to take her out to a musical. She was in the school theater group in high school and even minored in theatrical drama in college. I knew she’d love it, and it would make an amazing surprise. It could even create more triggers from when we were in school and allow her to feel the emotions that led to her love for me. That was worth sitting through a ridiculously long, hard to understand, and overrated musical.

At home, Maddie was dressed in a long red gown, one she’d chosen when we shopped together earlier in the week. She was stunning, absolutely stunning. I couldn’t wait to take her out and show her off on my arm.

She ran to me as I entered the house, her arms gripping me tightly around the neck as her feet lifted from the ground. The scent of her perfume wafted under my nose, nearly buckling my knees. “Damn, girl,” I roared, squeezing her tightly against my chest. “You look and smell amazing,” I sighed.

I’dt dressed in the office, choosing the nice suit I wore to the country club to scout out Gallo’s newest woman, but I was still underdressed to be seen with such a beauty.

Our lips met with an electric attraction that neither of us could deny. She may not have remembered her past, and I knew it still bothered her, but it was obvious she was happy. She was happy with me.

“Are you ready?” I asked, setting her back on her feet and taking her hands in mine. She nodded, her beautiful red lips painted to perfection, and her eye makeup thick and seductive.

The look in her eye and the parting of her lips told me she wanted to say something, but couldn’t, or wouldn’t. I longed to hear those three little words, but I knew it was too much to ask for so soon. She was just starting to become comfortable in her own skin. The doctors were so impressed with her progress, not only with her memories, but her ability to make herself a home in a world she felt so unattached to. She had me to thank, she told the doctor on her last visit. That made me proud and ashamed in the same moment.

The musical started early and would end with just enough time for a drive I’d selected for us to watch the sunset together. I’d taken her there on her first trip to Miami, hoping to have the strength to make my move, but I’d let it pass. This time, I knew things would be different, and I planned to make the best of our possible last moments together. So, when her memories returned, mine would be filled with moments that I would cherish for the rest of my life.

The valet took my keys, and I walked to the passenger side of my truck to let Maddie out with my help. Her hair flowed down her back, her blue eyes sparkled, and the low-cut, silky dress flowed from her body so elegantly that every man that noticed her stared with envy. She was the most beautiful woman there, and she was mine, at least for now.

The musical was tough to follow, but Maddie seemed to be having no trouble. Her eyes filled with tears as the woman sang in Italian, and she laughed with the crowd as if on cue, and gasped in all the right places. I was impressed with her, so fucking impressed. She wasn’t only hot, but smart, sophisticated, and had a smile that could melt a glacier.

My eyes were on Maddie the entire play, not once looking towards the stage. She giggled when she caught me staring at her, her cheeks turned a bright red, and she whispered that I’d miss the best part. Her beside me, happy: that was the best part, and I didn’t plan on missing a thing.

Once the show was over, we stepped out into the lobby where people all raved about the performance. “Maddie,” a voice called out, causing us both to turn in the direction it came from. “Maddie Stewart, oh my God, it’s been years,” the tall, dark-haired man greeted her with an extended hand.

She looked confused as she shook the man’s hand. “Don’t you remember me? Ian Mills,” he blurted.

“I’m sorry,” she said softly.

“From Bradley; we were in the same dramatic arts class,” he trailed, obviously disappointed by her rejection.

“I-I was in an accident recently; everything’s still a bit fuzzy,” she admitted with a forced smile. I could tell she was embarrassed to feel so rude to someone so friendly, someone she obviously should’ve known.

“I’m so sorry,” the man apologized.

“Isaac Lewis, Maddie’s fiancé,” I extended my hand to introduce myself.

“Nice to meet you. I hope things get better,” he smiled, and then rushed back to his wife.

I watched them talking and looking over their shoulders in our direction. Maddie’s eyes began to tear up, her face turned pale, and I knew it was only a matter of seconds before she had a full-blown meltdown. He called her Maddie Stewart, not Maddie Grubbs, and I knew that would be a trigger, one I may not be able to disable.

My arm slid around her waist and guided her out of the lobby. I handed the valet my ticket and waited for what felt like weeks for him to finally deliver my truck. I helped Maddie inside and drove off, headed to the secluded place I’d chosen to watch the sunset. It was the place I was certain would offer us an amazing evening, but now I wasn’t so sure.

“Why did he call me Maddie Stewart?” she whispered loudly as we drove up a winding road.

“He may have just gotten your name mixed with someone else. I’ve done that before,” I chuckled, trying to blow the incident off as a total accident.

“Maybe,” she sighed. “But, I should have remembered him if we were in college together, and especially if we were in the same class, right?” she questioned.

“Not necessarily. Maybe he had a crush on you, and so you stood out to him. If he wasn’t someone you were interested in, or friends with, you might have just forgotten him,” I explained.

She seemed to ponder this, but said nothing.  She turned her head away from me and sighed.

“I mean, do you honestly think you’d recognize everyone you went to college with, even just those in your classes?” I questioned with a smile.

“No, I guess not,” she agreed. I could tell by her tone that she believed me, and that maybe, just maybe, she’d let the Maddie Stewart thing go.

If she decided to check on the name, using my computer, she’d find her page; she’d find Rob, her engagement photos, and the truth about her past. She find out I’d lied to her, but she wouldn’t find anything that would tell her why.

“Where are we going?” she asked.

I turned and offered a smirk. “Somewhere we’ve been before.”

Her eyes lit up with excitement. I knew she loved anything that could trigger a memory or an emotion. I was hoping for a good one, and after fuckwad Ian nearly ruined my night, my life, I deserved one.

Chapter Twenty

Maddie

Isaac pulled onto a grassy area that overlooked the city. The view was amazing and familiar. I couldn’t place it yet, but a feeling of happiness rushed over me knowing that this place was somewhere I’d enjoyed before. “The sun’s about to set,” he whispered, leaning in to kiss my cheek.

His hand rested on my thigh; the warmth surged through the silk of my dress and drifted onto my skin. It was still early, but the sun going down made it feel late, secluded, and romantic.

Lights began to flicker as the night of the city came to life. The tall buildings lit up, the bridges, boats, and large neon signs. It was tantalizing.

“Anything triggering a memory?” Isaac examined with curious eyes.

“I feel like I was happy here. The view looks familiar, but the air was warmer, it was hot, and we’d just come from the beach because we were wearing swimsuits,” I remembered.

“Yes, that’s right,” he smiled, letting his hand slide higher on my thigh. “That swimsuit drove me wild, don’t ya know,” he smirked.

The devilish smile on his face made my body tingle and my breasts swell against the cool silk gown. “I wanted you to make a move,” I whispered, remembering we were only friends, not lovers. “Why didn’t you?” 

Isaac let out a deep growl as his eyes narrowed on my breasts. “You cold?”

“No,” I lied, knowing the night air was a little chilly, but not the reason for my tightened nipples that he was admiring.

I leaned back in the leather seat, my rear suddenly very toasty. I squirmed against the leather. “You getting hot?” Isaac teased. I nodded as he motioned to the seat heat icon he’d turned on. “You want me to turn it off?” he asked.

“No,” I sighed. The sensation of warmth was creating an arousal between my legs that I enjoyed.

“So, you remember you wanted me to make my move, eh?” he growled. “Why didn’t you make a move on me?” he questioned.

“Because I’m the girl,” I blushed.

My pussy was fiery with the heat blasting through the silk dress, causing me to writhe to Isaac’s obvious delight. “I’ll turn it down,” he whispered, leaning up to adjust the setting. His hand slid back up my thigh, this time entering the long slit in my dress and caressing my flesh.

I remembered the feelings I had when I’d been on this hill before, strongly. I wanted Isaac, but something was stopping me from admitting it, but what? Was I scared, intimidated, shy? I wanted to be courageous, to go after what I wanted. Whoever Maddie Grubbs was in the past, if she was the woman who let life pass her by, she wasn’t going to be that woman now. She was going to be adventurous, wild, and what better way to start than by seizing the moment now.

My legs parted, giving Isaac more room to freely fondle my flesh. I reached for my dress, slowly sliding the left shoulder strap past my shoulder and then past my breast. Isaac immediately latched on to my nipple, twisting it with his tongue, tugging it gently until I inhaled deep, and then gasped with delight.

His hand slid higher up my thigh, his fingers so close to my silk panties they grazed them lightly, tickling my swollen flesh beneath. My hand reached for the other strap, lowering it past my right breast.

Isaac wasted no time in giving it the same attention he had the other while his fingers lightly scratched at my panties.

His cock was so hard it bulged through his dress slacks so tight they looked close to ripping. I loved getting him so excited, teasing him, tempting him. I loved being the wild one, the adventurous one, the one I wished I would’ve been.

My back arched, lifting from the leather and pushing my breast into his mouth. His lips consumed it, sucking hard and offering quick, tantalizing flicks to my aching nipple.

I slid my hands to my side, sliding the silk of my dress up my legs, and then slowly to my hips. Isaac lifted from my breast and stared into my eyes. “You never cease to amaze me,” he whispered.

My fingers searched for my panty strings beneath my dress. I lifted my ass from the toasty seat and pulled them down from my hips. I left them at my thighs, tight and clamping my legs from opening any further. “Damn, you drive me wild,” he growled.

My hands slid the silk of my dress up past my hips. My trimmed, blonde bush exposed, and my swollen nub eagerly peeking through. Isaac leaned towards me, at first I thought to taste my pleasure bud, but instead he lowered his hand to the front of my seat and hit a button that sent the seat backward, offering much more leg room. “That’s better,” he whispered, eyeing me with satisfaction in his eyes that brought my arousal to new heights.

I was ready to tease him, to make him ache as badly as I was right now. My legs wouldn’t part any further with my panties still just above my knees, so I lifted them instead, pushing my red high-heels into the dash, and slid my ass down in the seat.

Isaac watched as my fingers playfully teased my nipples, one, and then the other before sliding through the bunched up red silk on my belly. They stopped at my pussy, playfully flicking my clit, and then sliding between my labia, swollen and tight. “Why don’t you turn your ass around so I can taste that sweet pussy,” Isaac ordered.

I spun my ass in the seat, letting my legs move to the center console. Isaac gripped my panties, ripping them with a passionate roar and tossing them to the backseat. His strong hands gripped my thighs, pulling my ass to the console and leaving my back and head rested on the inside of the passenger door.

My pussy lips were pushing through my thighs as my legs closed tight. I wasn’t done teasing him just yet and wanted him to work to open my flower. He pushed my legs upward, letting my heels press into the roof of the cab. His eyes lingered between my legs as he slid a finger slowly through the full lips that hid my secret garden from his view.

“Let me taste you,” he pleaded hungrily.

I knew he expected me to open my legs and invite his tongue between them to bathe my pussy and lap up the sweet nectar it offered. Instead, I reached between my own legs, slid a finger between my lips and deep into my pussy, twisting it inside the tight cavern and then slowly sliding it back out while he watched in amazement. I brought it to my own lips, sucking the flavor of my pussy from only the tip, and then extended it to his lips.

A deep growl vibrated from his throat as he sucked my finger into his mouth. He sucked hard, groaning as his tongue twisted and twirled around my juice-soaked digit.

A wild sensation erupted within me, unleashing a sexual appetite unlike I’d felt before. My legs parted, opening my intimacy, giving Isaac the free reign to please me or tease me any way he wished.

His hands gripped my thighs as he lowered his mouth between my legs. His tongue flicked at my clit, teasing me with twitches of pleasure. Eruptions of intense arousal shot through my body like electricity. The taste of my own juices still lingering on my lips, the scent of his cologne mixed with raw masculinity, the slapping of his tongue diving into my body, and the feel of his strong hand massaging my breasts had all of my senses overwhelmed with pleasure.

I wondered how long Isaac had loved me, how long it took for him to say something and make me his. The memories of my feelings when we were younger, the feeling of a missed opportunity when I was here with him last, that was all I had, nothing in between. Did he take another lover while waiting for me; did I, thinking he wasn’t interested?

Shut up, Maddie; enjoy the moment. You have no past now, only the present. Embrace it, love it, suck every last delicious drop of excitement from it.

My hips lifted from the console, arching my back and pushing my cunt hard into his mouth as my climax peaked. Tremors rolled through my body, then contractions tightened and released as I spurt cum onto Isaac’s finger, and the console of his truck. “Oh fuck,” he gasped, his voice raspy and anxious.

Convulsions from the aftermath of my powerful orgasm shook my body as Isaac quickly slipped out of his jacket, and then unbuttoned his shirt. The tight, muscular flesh beneath the dress shirt slowly exposed to my eyes sent a roaring anticipation throughout my entire body.

His tall frame made it difficult to remove his slacks, but he squirmed and wiggled until he managed to get them, and his boxers, removed. “Come over here,” he ordered, sitting back against the leather driver seat.

I worked on unmalting my body from the position he’d left me in as he hit the button to scoot his seat back as far as it would go.

Legs like jelly, I managed to climb to his side and straddle against his warm, hard cock. The truck smelled of sweet sex, expensive cologne and perfume, and leather. I sat in his lap, staring into his eyes, knowing those three little words were on the tip of my tongue. I wanted to say them, to scream them, but I couldn’t just yet. “Damn, you’re sexy,” Isaac whispered, reaching towards the wadded slacks in the floor. He fumbled with them until he found protection and lifted me from my position so I stood on the floorboard of the truck while he slipped the condom down his shaft.

His hands gripped my hips, lowering me slowly over his cock. My pussy ached as the tip of his cock pressed through my swollen labia and into my tight, still throbbing cunt. “Oooooh,” I moaned, pushing my weight onto him, and his cock deeper into my body.

His hands gripped my ass, pulling me into him as he finally filled me with his large member. My breathing instantly became labored, and my eyes could barely stay open as the sensation of his large manhood spread my hips and explored parts of my body I didn’t know existed until then.

The friction of my clit against his belly, the curve in his cock tickling at my G-spot with every thrust, and the pure satisfaction from the fullness he offered me was driving me wild, and I knew it wouldn’t be long before I came once again.

He lifted his ass from the seat, slamming into me hard. His balls bounced against my ass, slapping with the most delicious tune. I reached beneath me, gripping them so they wouldn't swing, and held them against the warm flesh of my ass.

Isaac began to moan as I tugged his balls as he slammed into me. My body shook, my breasts burnt with desire, and my heart filled with a familiar feeling, one I was certain I’d had before: one I’d had for Isaac.

The thrill of actually feeling the connection to the man who’d given me a ring and I’d accepted nearly crippled me, rendering me helpless as he continued to thrust between my legs with such force, such skill, that I let loose of my second orgasm, dripping my cum to my fingers that surrounded his tightening balls. “Fuck,” he roared as I contracted around his cock.

His grip on my ass tightened, pushing me into his chest. My chin rested on his broad shoulder while I struggled to catch my breath. I loved Isaac Lewis; I knew that now. There was no doubt in my mind at that very moment.

Chapter Twenty-One

Isaac

That ugly monster that gnawed the inside of my gut wouldn’t cease. I loved my time with Maddie, and that fucking little monster inside of me wanted to constantly remind me that she wasn’t mine, she never was, and after she finds out the truth, she never will be.

My fist clenched tight, and I slammed it hard against my mahogany desk, alerting Beth to my agitated state. “What is it?” she asked, standing in my doorway with a look of fear in her eyes.

“I fucking hate myself, so I know she’s gonna hate me too,” I groaned.

Beth moved into the office, offering a hand on my shoulder, and a warm smile. “If it’s meant to be, it will be,” she spouted a fucking cliché that had never done me, or anyone else, any good.

“I wish it were that easy,” I sighed, turning to my partner, my friend. We had always had a professional relationship, never mixing personal life at the office, but now she was the only one that knew my secret, so I relied on her for support, comfort, and guidance. “She remembered that she loved me, back when we were in school, and on her trip here,” I revealed.

Beth took a step back, her head tilted to the side like a confused puppy, and her eyes narrowed on mine. “She actually remembered that?” she gasped.

“Yes. I’m so fucking stupid. If only I had been honest, maybe she would have trusted me anyway, and we would be together, forever,” I complained.

“Well, not much that can be done about that,” she said.

“Two more days until Christmas, and then it’s over. It could’ve been forever, but now it’s over in two fucking days,” I roared, slamming my fist back down on the hard desk.

“You don’t know that. If she truly loves you, she’ll remember that. Don’t think the worse,” Beth consoled.

I took a deep breath, knowing that she might be right. I doubted it highly, but there was a chance. “I have to close that case for Gallo before New Year’s Eve, and I’ve gotten nowhere, so maybe I need to postpone the trip anyway,” I blurted.

“I tried calling you last night, but you didn’t answer. I got the info Mr. Gallo needed,” she beamed, holding a red folder in her hand.

My heart sank deep as I took the folder, realizing that was my only excuse. I guess I could make up one; it’s not like I’ve been honest about much else lately. “So, is she another whore?” I snarled.

“On the contrary, she has actually cleaned up her act entirely,” Beth smiled.

I wasn’t sure why she thought that was such a good thing. If Paul Gallo got hitched, to a woman he trusted, then we’d stand to lose accounts from him at least six times a year, more when he was feeling really frisky.

“How can you prove someone is not doing something wrong?” I chuckled, amused by her positivity this morning.

“I tapped her phone, hacked into her cell and have gotten every call, text or social media post she’s had for the last six months, well before she met Paul. She’s clean, and she actually loves this guy. I even saw a text where her mother drooled over her daughter hooking up with money, and Tatiana’s response was, ‘I’ll sign a prenup if we marry, just so you won’t be able to badger me for money. I love him, and I don’t care if he had ten cents to his name.’ Strange, right?” she shook her head.

“Wow. I guess there is true love out there,” I laughed.

“Yes, there is, and it always prospers,” Beth smirked.

“Stop with the fuckin’ clichés already,” I insisted.

“Knock, knock,” Maddie mimicked her tap on the door. “Are you busy?” she asked, moving towards my office.

“Not at all. Thanks to Beth and her super skills, I don’t have a job today, or for the rest of the week for that matter.” I smiled at Maddie and then winked at Beth.

“Good, maybe I can steal you away early then,” Maddie grinned a little too eagerly.

“Did you walk here alone?” I questioned.

“Yes,” she sighed, obviously ready for my lecture.

“I know you can handle yourself, but I just worry. You could’ve called, and I would have come and picked you up,” I insisted.

“It’s like six blocks, eight at most,” Maddie giggled and shot Beth a knowing look, which made her giggle as well. Women, do they all just bond together because they have tits?

I wasn’t going to win this argument, that was clear with Beth jumping in to scold me for treating Maddie like a four-year-old.

She was holding something behind her back, something that looked like an envelope. “What is that?” I asked.

She pulled it from her back to the front and smiled wildly. “The invitation,” she bounced as she talked. “I want to go,” she pleaded.

It was hard to resist the most beautiful woman in the entire world, especially when she pushed her pouty lip out and batted those baby blues. “Why do you want to go to this? It’s a snorefest,” I protested.

“It really is,” Beth agreed. Thank you, Beth, for finally fuckin’ having my back!

“I don’t care; I want to go. We need to do something fun,” she whined.

Fuck!

“We haven’t had any fun?” I teased, moving closer to her with my hands opened and ready to grip her. She giggled as I snatched her by the waist and pulled her into me. “The sunset wasn’t fun?” I whispered in her ear.

She squirmed in my arms, pulling out of my embrace. “That was just us. I want to do something more social, with other people,” she insisted.

“Baby, this is a charity thing. I went years ago when a buddy from the force roped me into it, but not since. I may not even know anyone there. That’s why it’s addressed to just me; I get one every year, and every year I toss it in the trash,” I explained, hoping that may change her mind.

“Good, because I certainly won’t know anyone there. I don’t know anyone anywhere I go,” she laughed. It was the first time I’d ever seen her laugh at her problem. It was refreshing. She was happy, truly happy, so who was I to deny her more happiness in life? Hadn’t she had enough turmoil? Wasn’t she ready to face more, possibly worse than she’d already endured?

“Okay, fine,” I gave in.

Maddie squealed with delight, bouncing up and down with the invitation still gripped in her fingers. Beth rolled her eyes. “It really is boring,” she sighed.

“I need to find something to wear,” Maddie immediately blurted out once her bouncing stopped.

“What about your beautiful red dress? I love that dress,” I beamed.

Maddie shook her head and grinned in my direction. “Yes, I know how much you love that dress, but I want something new,” she insisted. “I can contact my bank and have them wire me money,” she smirked.

“That will take days; just take my card. Besides, all of your identification is missing, and anything you’d need to get it is back is in Portland,” I reminded her.

“Why did I leave everything behind if I was coming to stay?” she questioned.

“Because I was going to travel back with you to pack,” I quickly answered with a lie, another fuckin’ lie.

“Will you go with me?” Maddie turned to Beth.

“Sure, I’d love to,” she agreed quickly without so much as looking towards me for my reaction.

I pulled out my card and handed it to Maddie, who quickly thanked me with a kiss.

Chapter Twenty-Two

Maddie

Beth was quiet at first, not as friendly as I’d expected. She was so kind the day I had my breakdown and knew exactly what to do to calm me down. Now, she just seemed distant, like we’d never even met before.

She drove, and since I didn’t know anything about the area, she offered to take me to the large mall just outside of town. “I don’t know what your tastes are, so at least there is a little of everything there,” she smiled. It was a weak smile, almost nervous.

“Perfect,” I agreed, and sat back against the seat of her little blue convertible and enjoyed the brisk winter air on my face.

“What kind of music do you like?” she asked, turning on the stereo.

“Whatever you listen to is fine,” I replied, realizing that classical music wasn’t a genre that most people enjoyed. At least Isaac didn’t. I could see him cringe when I turned the station to it, so I normally put the dial on classic rock: something we both enjoyed.

Beth turned on the stereo and a woman was singing with the most amazing voice I’d ever heard. The song was powerful and strong, and the lyrics nearly brought tears to my eyes. “You like Adele?” she asked.

“I’m not sure I’ve ever heard her,” I admitted, but I knew I loved her now.

The lyrics gave me goosebumps. There was something familiar about the song, but I wasn’t sure if it was an actual memory or just an emotion from the heartfelt words she sang so beautifully.

“So, how come we’d never met?” I asked.

“Isaac’s a very private guy,” Beth shrugged.

“Yeah, but you guys work together all the time, so wouldn’t he have mentioned me?” I asked.

“Oh, he’s mentioned you plenty,” Beth laughed.

“He has? Like what has he said?” I probed.

“He’s just talked about how much he loves you, how he’s always loved you,” Beth smiled and then turned into a large parking lot. “It’s crowded for so early in the afternoon,” I exclaimed.

“It’s Friday,” Beth sighed, driving up and down each aisle until finally finding a spot near the front entrance.

“So, he told you he’s always been in love with me?” I asked, still beaming from the sweet things he’d said about me. I felt better knowing at least she knew about me, but still found it strange that we never met. I waited for her answer, but none came.

“Have you always lived in Miami?” I asked, trying desperately to break through her frosty shell.

“No, I lived in Ohio most of my life,” she answered as she hit the button to put the top up.

I got out and followed her to the entrance doors, still eager to find out more about her. “Why did you move to Miami?” I questioned.

As soon as she opened the doors, a wonderful smell filled my nostrils. “What is that smell?” I asked, forgetting my previous question.

“Cinnabon,” she grinned. “You’ve never had one?” she asked.

I shook my head. Beth gripped my hand and pulled me towards the delicious aroma. We stopped at a small round booth in the center of the mall. “Two large buns please, extra cream cheese, and,” she paused to look at me, “do you like iced coffee?” I nodded, not really knowing if that was true or not. “Two large iced coffees,” she finished her order to the redheaded boy with freckles stuck in the small booth.

The boy placed two extremely large buns lathered with melted cream cheese in a to-go box, and then handed us each a large iced coffee. “You’ll love this,” Beth assured me as she led me to a small metal café table near the booth.

I sipped the coffee, at first not sure if I liked it, but then once it hit the back of my throat and notes of vanilla pulled through, I was hooked. “Wow,” I exclaimed.

“Try the bun; the coffee is crap compared to these babies,” she boasted.

I picked up my fork and tore off a piece. As it entered my mouth, I instantly melted into my chair, no longer caring that the metal back and un-cushioned seat were so uncomfortable. “Oh my,” I moaned.

“Better than sex,” Beth sighed.

“I don’t know about that,” I beamed, my cheeks instantly turning red.

“You really love Isaac, don’t you?” she asked.

“I do,” I admitted.

“Even though you can’t remember anything?” she asked.

I shrugged my shoulders, shoving another bite of the bun in my mouth before answering. “I remember loving him from before, like when we were younger, but I just can’t remember anything past that,” I responded.

“But, you love him now?” she questioned.

“I do,” I admitted again.

“Then that’s all that matters,” she smiled.

We fell into a comfortable silence, both of us attacking our food.  When she spoke again, my bun was halfway gone.

“I moved here from Ohio five years ago for a man, one that I thought I loved, and that I thought loved me,” she answered my earlier question without my repeating it.

“So, it didn’t work out?” I asked, saddened by the fact that Beth had been hurt. She was so kind, so compassionate, it didn’t seem fair.

“He was abusive, and if it weren’t for Isaac, I might have never gotten away from him. I owe him my life,” Beth said with a warm smile.

“How did Isaac help?”

“He was hired by my husband to follow me. He was insanely jealous. So, Isaac went above and beyond the normal duties of a private eye, which Frank, that was his name, expected. He watched the house, figuring I may be sneaking men in, or sneaking out at night, and what he found was me being abused by the man he worked for.

“So, he took it upon himself to give Frank back his money to void his contract, and continue watching the house, getting pictures of the abuse, recordings of the fighting, and called the police. Frank was arrested, and they weren’t going to be able to use the evidence he had gathered, but he told them he worked for me, and that I’d paid for his services, which then allowed them to use the footage and the images of the abuse.

“He gave me a look across the room as he spoke to officers, telling them that he was working for me. I knew Frank had hired someone to watch me, he’d had several others before Isaac, but none of them either ever saw what Frank was doing, or cared enough to get involved,” she added.

I watched her sip her coffee, and then dig into her cinnamon roll. It was obvious this was hard for her, and that the topic was a scratch on her soul that hadn’t quite healed, but she was strong, able to move on, able to tell her story, and for that I admired her. “So, he gave me a job, and here I am,” she laughed.

“That is so amazing. I’m so glad Isaac stood up for you,” I smiled, reaching across the table to her hand. I held it in mine as her dark eyes lifted to mine. They were watery, but no tears fell. It was obvious she was used to holding herself together.

We didn’t talk about anything else, except how good the cinnabun was as we finished it. I watched people walking by, all dressed up, carrying bags in each hand from various stores, and wondered where they were going, what their weekend plans were, and if they were as truly happy as I was, even with a diminished memory of my life.

There was a dull pain in my side that I couldn’t shake. Something about Beth’s story hit me hard, real hard. I didn’t know what it was, maybe just hearing that someone could be treated that way, but my nightmare, the feelings I’d had all along, something wasn’t right.

“So, what do you want to wear?” Beth asked as she tossed the empty cardboard box in the trash.

“Something formal, but sexy,” I smirked.

My cheeks blushed as I thought about the night in my sexy formal red gown on the hill. Yes, something that would bring me the same results. That would be perfect. I wasn’t sure exactly how to describe it to Beth without going into detail about what it’s true purpose would be.

“So you want a dress that he loves to see you in, but that he can’t wait to rip off of you?” she asked with a mischievous grin.

“Exactly,” I giggled. “How did you know?”

“Those bright pink cheeks told on you. Remember, I’m trained to read people,” she winked.

She pulled me into a store where mannequins wore some of the most amazing gowns I’d ever seen. “Holy shit!” I gasped as I looked at one of the price tags. Beth pulled me aside and laughed.

“Don’t worry about money. Isaac has plenty. So, don’t look at the price tags; just find something you like,” she advised.

Isaac has plenty? I knew the beach house had to be a pretty penny, and the Escalade, A.K.A. gas guzzler, wasn’t cheap, but I assumed he had an inheritance. A private eye business couldn’t pay that well. I hated that I didn’t know so much about the man I loved, the man I was going to marry.

I browsed the store, carefully peeking at each of the dresses price tags when Beth wasn’t looking. I remembered the feeling of not having much, at least not enough to not look at a price tag before I pulled out my credit card. “Can I help you?” an uptight middle-aged woman approached me with lipstick so bright red it was nearly orange against her pale skin.

“I’m just looking,” I smiled.

“Yes, you can help us,” Beth chimed in. “We need something that will turn every head in the place, something that will torture her man all night long while he dreams of ripping it off of her,” she added.

I blushed to the point my cheeks ached from the burn. How could she be so straightforward, so brass, so bold? I want to be like that.

The woman’s painted on eyebrows lifted and her orange lips cocked to one side. I watched her cold eyes scan the room, and then she shook her head. “No, none of this will do,” she hissed. “Go to the dressing room, and I’ll bring you the elite line from the back,” she demanded.

Another woman instantly appeared, as if she’d snapped her twiggy fingers to alert her to serve our needs. The elite selection in the back sounded extremely pricey. The dresses on the floor were more than I could imagine spending on one outfit, so the stuff from the back had to be twice that much. “I think we should go somewhere else,” I whispered to Beth as the sales girl ushered me to the dressing room.

She pushed her way into the room with me, her cold hands gripping at my arms as she ordered me to stand up straight. She pulled out a measuring tape and began taking my measurements. “Okay, get undressed to your panties, no bra,” she ordered.

“Excuse me?” I choked.

“You want sexy, so no bra,” she ordered again with a thick Russian accent.

I was expecting privacy, but apparently that was not part of their plan. She stayed in the dressing room with me while I undressed. I could hear Beth giggling outside the door as I continued to tell the woman I could handle getting dressed on my own. “These are very delicate and expensive dresses; you must have assistance while in the store,” she demanded.

Well, who the fuck is going to give me assistance when I’m not in the store? It’s not like I have five servants on hand at my mansion. Ugh!

The stiff woman with orange lips and twiggy fingers slung open the door without concern that my tits were on display. Beth made a face from behind her back that made me laugh. “I hate you,” I mouthed to her, and the flipped her off with a playful smirk.

“Quit making faces, not ladylike,” the Russian dressing room Nazi said.

I rolled my eyes.

“Just give me the dress,” I smiled as politely as possible.

It was royal blue, sequence covering the sheer material, and when the woman helped slide it over my head, it felt heavy, rich, and expensive against my skin. The neckline was low, so low that it nearly showed my belly button, and when I turned in the mirror, the back was just as low, with my ass crack actually showing as I turned. “No way,” I protested. “I want something sexy, not slutty. I love the color, but maybe something shorter, not so low of a neckline, and not backless,” I requested.

The woman with orange lips looked offended as she took the dress away. She quickly returned with another, the same color, made of silk with metallic embellishments on only the top; the dress was long but slit high on the leg to show off my long, lean sticks. Only one strap held it up, and the back was barely there, but at least didn’t go to my crack. I loved how I looked in it. I felt like a star ready to walk the red carpet. My dressing room attendant smiled, something I didn’t think she could do. I opened the door to show Beth, who immediately covered her mouth and let out a squeal. “That’s the one,” she screeched in delight.

It was perfect, but I was still concerned about the price. This dress, unlike the others, had no price tag, scaring the living hell out of me. “It’s too much,” I insisted.

“No, it’s the one. We’ll take it,” Beth announced loudly as she jumped up to hug me.

It was strange, watching her go from so cool and frosty to so warm and lovable. I enjoyed it, don’t get me wrong. I couldn’t remember what it was like to have a girlfriend, and according to Isaac, I really didn’t have any, at least not since college.

“Okay, but I’m paying him back every penny,” I insisted as the dressing room attendant was already removing my dress. Ugh! If this is how rich people live, I don’t want to be rich.

When the lady swiped Isaac’s credit card for the dress, and matching shoes, of course, at Beth’s insistence, I nearly croaked at the amount of zero’s in the total.

I managed to get her into a lower-end shop where I bought some cute panties, an anklet, and some fake jewelry that could pass for diamonds as long as no one showed up at the party with a jewelers glass.

By the time we got home, I was terrified to enter. “What if he kills me?” I whined. Beth laughed, pushing me inside.

Isaac sat on the couch reading a magazine and his eyes lifted as we entered. “You girls get everything you needed?” he asked, and then looked at the bags in my hand. “Did you leave anything at the store?” he teased.

My heart raced, both with excitement, and fear. I’d pushed him to go to this party. It wasn’t even something he wanted to do. And now, here I was, spending a fortune on a dress and shoes. He couldn’t be happy.

His warm smile soothed my worries, and his eyes looking into mine lovingly made me nearly melt. “I think it was too much. I can take it all back. We don’t even have to go. It’s a silly idea,” I rambled.

Isaac shot Beth a look, somewhat of a glare, and then grinned. Beth leaned in towards him, handing him the receipt. I watched his eyes widen, and I could see sweat beading up on his forehead. “Damn, you’ve created a monster,” he teased Beth, who didn’t seem bothered by it at all. I, on the other hand, was freaking out. I mean, totally freaking out.

“You’re worth every cent. I’m happy if you’re happy,” he smiled with his eyes still offering the same loving glance in my direction. Wow, he was truly amazing.

“I’m happy with the dress, just not the price,” I admitted.

“It’s just money. Having a beautiful woman on my arm in a dress that compliments her beauty and makes her feel confident, that’s priceless,” he smiled. “Can I see what you got?” he asked, lifting up from the couch.

I jerked the bags behind me, “No way,” I exclaimed.

His smile fell crooked on his face, and his eyes narrowed as he shook his head. He was already dressed, wearing a white tux shirt and pressed slacks, and a jacket was hanging over the back of the couch. His tie was untied, dangling around his neck, and the musky cologne he’d chosen was wafting through the room and driving me wild with desire. “I’ll go get dressed,” I announced and pulled Beth by the hand up the stairs.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Isaac

Beth walked down the stairs with her face glowing. I looked past her, waiting for Maddie, but she wasn’t anywhere to be found. I was dying to see her in the new dress.

“Is she ready?” I asked Beth, who just nodded.

The sound of heels on the hardwood floor brought my eyes to the top of the stairs. Maddie appeared, her hair curled and loosely done up on her head. Tiny blonde ringlets dangled at her cheeks, and a side bang swooped across her forehead. Her lips were a beautiful shade of burgundy, like a fine wine, and her lashes so long I could see them batting nervously from the top step.

I was stunned by her beauty as she took the first step down the stairs with such grace and elegance. The slit in the gorgeous gown went all the way her thigh. Oh my! I couldn’t take my attention from her, and I was certain my mouth was hanging wide open. I didn’t deserve her. She was too much. She was perfect.

“You are stunning,” I gasped, extending my hand to her as she took the last step. The metallic embellishments on the dress made it pop, and every time light hit it, it sparkled. “I’ll be the envy of the event,” I smiled, leaning in to kiss her softly on the lips. I didn’t want to smudge her perfect application; that was for later. Later, there’d be no rules, no nice guy. I’d smear that lipstick and rip that dress right from her. I didn’t care what it cost.

“You look so handsome,” she spoke softly, her blue eyes sparkling in the light.

Beth patted me on the back. “Why she loves you, I’ll never know,” she teased.

I smiled, but I couldn’t take my eyes from Maddie. She was so beautiful, so elegant.

Beth rushed us out of the door and into the car, complaining that if we didn’t go now, we’d end up on the living room floor, and all that money and work would be for nothing. She wasn’t wrong. My cock was already paying full attention to the beauty in its presence, and as soon as it could find a way to steal the rest of the blood it needed from my brain to take over, that dress was getting ripped off.

The valet took my keys as we pulled up the large banquet center. It was a tall building, designed to look like a castle. As Maddie slipped her hand through my arm, I felt like royalty entering the palace. Every head turned, and I knew all the men were drooling over the beauty on my arm.

Relief fell over me as I scanned the hall for anyone I might know. Elijah was my main concern. He was the one who talked me into this charity event years ago, and my complaining so badly about the boredom caused him to quit asking me to return. So, I had no way of knowing if he still attended. I could only hope he’d finally grown bored of the stuffy event as well.

“Would you like a drink?” I asked, grinning like a kid in a candy store as I turned to Maddie.

“Yes, please,” she replied so elegantly.

I left her by the main room, where she could be noticed by everyone who entered. She didn’t seem to mind the attention; in fact, that dress had given her a confidence I don’t think I’d seen on her since grade school.

At the bar, I ordered a white wine and a whiskey and was ready to make my way back to Maddie when someone slapped me hard on the back. “Fancy seeing you here again; thought it was a bore,” Elijah grumbled in my ear.

“Yeah, I thought I’d give it another try,” I smiled.

“Who’s the broad?” he smacked his lips as he talked.

I followed his eyes to Maddie and felt panic fall over me. “That’s Maddie,” I answered.

“The Maddie, the one you’ve pined over all these years?” he cheered.

I nodded but motioned for him to lower his voice. “There’s something I have to tell you,” I whispered.

“Okay, well, first I want to meet this lovely lady,” Elijah insisted, taking the white wine from my hand, and moving towards the spot where Maddie stood.

“Play along, and I’ll explain later,” I insisted as he gave me a strange look.

“You must be Maddie. Man, I’ve heard so much about you,” Elijah said, handing her the drink.

“Yes, and you are?” she asked, her eyes lingering on mine with confusion filling them.

“Elijah, only Isaac’s best friend, SEAL teammate, and mentor,” he boasted.

Maddie smiled, but her lips were stretched so thin, it was obvious she was frustrated. “Wow, look at that ring,” he roared, taking her hand in his.

“Yes, you helped me pick it out,” I laughed. “I think Elijah got here a little early and started off at the bar too fast,” I excused his behavior. “Can you excuse us for a moment while I help him find a coffee?” I pleaded, hoping she wouldn’t be too upset about me leaving her alone yet again.

I jerked Elijah’s arm towards the main room. “I tried to tell you I needed to talk to you before you just bounced over there,” I snarled.

“Okay, what is going on?” he asked, his expression serious. “Does this have to do with what was bothering you at breakfast?” he added.

“Yes,” I sighed.

I didn’t want to do it, but there was no other way now: I had to tell him the truth. I started from the beginning, how Maddie came here to hide from her abusive ex that wouldn’t leave her alone and didn’t stop until I got to the part where I had to take her to Portland after Christmas as promised, and she’d find out the truth and leave me for good.

“What am I gonna do?” I pleaded with him for some advice.

“You have to come clean. If she finds out on her own, that’s even worse,” he advised.

I knew he was right, but I didn’t really see the benefit of telling her on my own now. Too much time had passed. Enough time that I’d had ample opportunity to tell her the truth, or even parts of it, but I didn’t. It was too late. I’d have to let her find out on her own, and she could walk away from me forever if that’s what she felt she needed to do. I could only pray that the love we’d formed for one another over all these years and over the last weeks would be strong enough to bring her back to me.

“You really got yourself in a pickle this time,” Elijah sighed.

“I know,” I agreed.

“It doesn’t matter what I do now, or how I do it; she’s gonna hate me. I just want more time with her, as much as I can get. Please just go along with it,” I pleaded.

Elijah patted me on the back. “I’ve always got your back,” he boasted, just as Maddie walked up.

“You two okay?” she asked, her eyes filled with confusion.

“Yes. He was just messing around; he’s not drunk,” I laughed nervously.

Elijah extended his hand to Maddie. “You look stunning,” he smiled and lifted her hand to his lips for a kiss.

“I’m planning a Christmas dinner. I’m sure Isaac would love it if you joined us, I know I would,” Maddie proposed so sweetly, the devil himself couldn’t have refused the offer.

Elijah’s smile widened, and he got that damn look in his eyes that I hated. “Of course, I wouldn’t miss it,” he replied.

Yeah, he didn’t want to miss watching me fumble all over myself to keep up this lie. He knew I was the world’s worst liar, or at least I used to be. The motive to protect Maddie, and then to keep her in my life, somehow made lying come easily to me lately.

“Is your wife here?” Maddie asked, scanning the room.

“Not married. I can’t find a woman as beautiful as you,” he charmed.

He was a charmer, always was. The ladies loved him, and by the looks of Maddie’s blushing cheeks, she loved him too. Shit!

“I’ll leave you two to mingle. I’ve got to talk business with a couple of the bigwigs in here,” Elijah excused himself gracefully. I was relieved.

I’d have to call him after this and give him more details. I only had time to give him the basics, and I know it didn’t put me in the best light. That’s what I was afraid of with Maddie: she’d only see the bad decisions I made in this situation, not the reasons why, not the reasons that mattered.

“We’re having a Christmas dinner?”  I asked Maddie once we were alone. I hadn’t heard about that, not once had she mentioned a Christmas dinner.

“Yes. I’ve been working on my cooking skills, and I wanted to surprise you. I just thought it would be nice if you had your friend there, and I invited Beth too,” she announced.

That was probably my last day as Maddie’s lover; why would I want anyone else there? I wanted her all to myself.

“That’s a great idea,” I fibbed to avoid hurting her feelings. The look in her eyes told me she was excited, and her happiness was all that mattered to me. We’d have that evening together, as long as they didn’t stay late. I’d make sure they left early.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Maddie

I tightened my apron strings and stood proudly in the kitchen. My meal was planned out, already prepped, and I was confident that it would be cooked to perfection. I wanted so badly to make Isaac happy today. I didn’t have money for a gift, so I spent all my free time watching cooking shows like he’d suggested, and planned out this meal we’d share together, and with friends.

He didn’t realize while I picked his brain about memories from our childhood that I was gathering info on his favorite holiday meals. A pecan pie made from scratch just like his grandmother’s, a roasted turkey with sage stuffing like his mom’s, and deviled eggs like his uncle Greg used to bring every year. I had Beth contact any family members he had to get the recipe, since I wasn’t sure if they even knew about me or not. He’d said I was a private person, the reason why there weren’t any pictures of us around, why he didn’t even have “in a relationship” as his status on Facebook, and why I didn’t even have a personal Facebook.

Until I got my memory fully back on track, I wasn’t going to upset anything in his world or mine. I just wanted to enjoy the moment, and the moment couldn’t be better.

“What are you doing up so early?” Isaac asked, wrapping his arms around me from behind.

“I’m making dinner, so shoo,” I pried his hands from my waist and ordered him from the kitchen.

He gripped my apron as he backed out of the room as ordered, and pulled me into him. “I’ll stay out, on one condition,” he persuaded.

“What’s that?” I asked, admiring his playful smirk.

“You come kiss me whenever you get a break,” he countered.

“Deal,” I agreed, immediately lifting up on my tippy toes to reach Isaac’s lips.

His hands roamed my body, tracing the curve of my hips. My breasts pushed against the silk of my bra, the friction filling me with arousal. “No, I’ve got work to do,” I slipped out of Isaac’s grip just as his hands squeezed my ass cheeks, pulling me into his half-hard erection.

“It’s only nine in the morning. What time’s dinner?” he scoffed, obviously disappointed by my rejection. It wasn’t easy to turn him down; my panties were already tacky against my warm flesh from his hug and kiss. This was more important. I’d worked hard to create his special meal.

“We’ve got the rest of our lives to make love,” I smirked, slapping him playfully on the ass as I shooed him back out of the kitchen.

I cleaned the turkey, gagging as I reached inside the carcass to remove the bag of giblets and gizzards, and, I believe, the heart. Oh my! Part of Isaac’s recipe required that I use these nasty parts, along with the neck to make the gravy, so I set it aside for later.

Isaac tried to peek inside the kitchen four times by the time I got the turkey prepped and stuffed. I washed my hands, rushed out into the living room, and jumped on his lap. Our lips melted together as his hands caressed my rear. The strength of his grip pulled at my ass cheeks, which in turn, pulled at my labia. He was acting more attentive than usual, and the way he continued to beg and plead for a moment of my time, just for a kiss, seemed needier than normal. I brushed it off as it being Christmas.  His grandparents had been gone for years, and his mother passed sometime after he graduated college, and his dad moved away, which, according to Isaac, they didn’t have a relationship. He was close to his Uncles, Aunts, and cousins though.

I knew there was a part of me that was missing something, but I wasn’t sure what, or couldn’t remember what, to be exact. I knew my family was gone and had been gone for some time, but there had to be holiday traditions I carried on. I wished desperately that I could remember what they were. But, today was about Isaac. I wanted to bring his warm family Christmas to his home. He deserved it.

“Can you put up the decorations?” I asked, pointing to a box on the floor.

“Where did that come from?” he asked.

“I found it in the garage,” I admitted to snooping while he was away.

He smirked and got up, lifting me from his lap. He opened the box to find a long strand of garland, a table cloth, napkins, holiday plates, and a few cute holiday figures to place around the dining room.

“If you insist,” he grinned.

“I do,” I winked.

“So, what are you making?” he asked, staring at me with a concerned look. “Spinach quiche, quinoa salad, bean sprout pie?” he teased.

“You’ll find out what I’m making when it’s done, and thanks for the ideas; I needed a few more sides,” I laughed and disappeared back into the kitchen.

I put together the pecan pie and popped it into the second oven built into the brick wall and then filled the deviled eggs, hiding them back in the fridge.

It was already eleven thirty, and I still had to make the sides. “What time are Elijah and Beth going to be here?” Isaac called from the other room.

“Three o’clock,” I yelled back.

I knew it was an odd time, but after talking to both Elijah and Beth, I found out that he had to enjoy dinner with some of his other friends at seven, and she had an early morning Christmas breakfast at her grandmother’s nursing home. Isaac and I didn’t have anything going on, so I was more than happy to customize our meal to allow them both to attend.

I sat at the island counter in the kitchen and peeled what felt like a hundred potatoes, when in actuality it was only about nine. I remembered my grandmother making mashed potatoes from a box, a red box that contained powdered flakes that magically turned into delicious mashed potatoes. I giggled at the memory, feeling blessed that I was able to see my grandmother's face on Christmas, even if just in a long lost memory returned.

I had everything that would make Isaac’s Christmas meal nostalgic, giving him the warmth of home, but I had to add a few healthy options. Sweet potatoes were peeled, diced, and baked with ginger, honey, garlic, and a smidge of brown sugar, a large salad with baby spinach, arugula, and romaine tossed with loads of veggies, and whole carrots, peeled and roasted on the rack below the pecan pie.

“Baby,” Isaac called for me from the other room. I assumed it to be his thirty-minute kiss break, so I decided to surprise him with one of the deviled eggs I’d made. I reached into the fridge, grabbed one that was perfectly filled, and headed into the living room. “Are you done yet? I miss you,” he whined so sexily my body shuddered.

“I’m almost done, I promise,” I smiled and brought the deviled egg from behind my back. “Would you like to try?” I asked.

His eyes widened and followed the egg as I twirled it around near his face. “Yes, please,” he grinned. “But, I have to warn you, Uncle Greg made the best-deviled eggs. I have no idea what he did to them, but I’ve never had one like his, so don’t be offended if yours don’t bring me to tears like his did,” he teased.

“Yeah, yeah, just try the egg,” I snickered.

He opened his mouth and let me slide it inside, one entire bite for the half of egg. At first, he didn’t react, just chewed, and then suddenly his eyes lit up, and his smile stretched across his face. “Oh my God! I’ve searched the world for an egg like his; that’s exactly like the ones he made. What did you put in those?” he exclaimed, standing from his chair and twirling me around in his arms.

“I can’t tell you. It’s an ancient family secret,” I giggled.

“That just made my day, baby,” he beamed.

“There’s more,” I smirked, and disappeared back into the kitchen. Damn, those eggs must be good; he didn’t even ask for a kiss that time.

Everything was finished and ready to eat when the doorbell rang. I untied my apron, hung it on the back of the pantry door, and began setting the dining room table with all the delicious dishes I’d made. I stood back, staring at the table with pride as I heard Elijah and Beth in the other room.

I greeted them with a glass of red wine and invited them to enjoy the meal I prepared.

Isaac’s eyes nearly popped out of his head. “You called someone and ordered this; that’s why I wasn’t allowed in the kitchen all day,” he teased.

Elijah and Beth both complimented my presentation, and Beth admitted she didn’t eat at the nursing home so she could enjoy the meal here. There was a strange satisfaction I got deep in my soul from having everyone compliment my cooking. I knew I’d never felt this same satisfaction before, so maybe cooking was what I was meant to do, not instructing yoga.

“Everyone, please say what this year has brought to you that you’re appreciative to take into the next,” I instructed, motioning to Beth to go first.

“I’m appreciative that I made a good friend, Maddie. She is my first true girlfriend, and I hope that we are friends for years to come,” she smiled in my direction.

“I’m appreciative for my SEAL brothers, especially Isaac, one of the most stand-up guys I’d ever met,” Elijah noted. “I’m also appreciative of Maddie, the woman that brought a light into my good friend's life. May that light never dim,” Elijah boasted.

“I’m appreciative that I got to experience what it’s like to be with the girl of my dreams,” Isaac smiled directly at me.

“I’m appreciative that even if my old memories never fully return, I’m surrounded by amazing people who will help me create new ones, better ones,” I beamed.

Talk about Elijah’s and Isaac’s SEAL brotherhood was a heavy topic at the table. I noticed Beth taking a very strong interest in Elijah.

Isaac took a bite of the dressing and then the turkey, staring at me the entire time he chewed. I was giddy with nervousness as he stared me down, confused as to how I made food that resembled his favorite dishes. He shoved another deviled egg in his mouth, taking his time to savor the flavor with small chews.

“Okay, what’s going on here?” he asked, staring into my eyes. I shrugged with a wide grin. I watched his eyes move to the pecan pie near the center of the table. “Beth, would you mind passing that pie down here please?” he asked sweetly.

He cut a thin sliver of it and placed it on his plate. I watched him poke it with his fork, checking the texture, and then tap the top to ensure it was nice and crisp. He looked up at me as he filled his fork with a bite, and tears flooded his eyes as he took the bite into his mouth. “How is this possible?” he asked, wiping his tears from his cheeks and shaking off the overflow of emotion.

“I didn’t have money to get you a gift since I didn’t have my new cards delivered here. So, Beth helped me gather up the recipes you said you missed the most so you could enjoy your Christmas favorites, even if you couldn’t have the loved ones that made them here with you,” I smiled.

He stood from the table, rushed to my side, and held me tight in his arms. His body shuddered, and I knew he was still fighting back tears of joy, but I couldn’t contain mine. My cheeks soaked with salty tears, spilling onto his shoulder as I laughed from nothing more than sheer happiness. “You’re the most amazing woman I’ve ever known,” Isaac said, kissing me softly on the lips.

He moved to Beth, giving her a heartfelt hug as well, telling her how much it meant to him that she’d help make this day happen.

It was a perfect meal, and a perfect Christmas. Even though I couldn’t really remember any of my past Christmases, I was certain this was the best one yet.

Isaac offered to help me clean up after dinner, refusing to let Beth or Elijah help. As I gathered the last dish from the table, I noticed Elijah and Beth sitting close to one another on the couch. Beth’s eyes were sparkling as she stared up at Elijah, and his hand rested on her knee as they spoke.

“I think they hit it off,” I told Isaac, who immediately denied the possibility.

“Why not?” I asked.

“Elijah is a wild man; he will never settle down, and Beth, well, she has a lot of pain still from her last man,” he explained.

“Elijah seemed very touched by our relationship, and Beth is ready for love. I’ve seen how she looks at us when we’re together, how hard she’s worked for both of us,” I smirked, knowing I was right, and Isaac, well, he was wrong.

Elijah stood, hugged me tightly, and thanked me for the meal. He slapped Isaac on the shoulder and called him a crybaby little bitch before pulling him in for a tight hug.

“Where are you headed?” he asked Beth.

“Probably home to watch a movie or do some paperwork,” she replied.

I was watching how they looked at one another. There was something there. “You can’t work on Christmas. Come with me; I’m meeting up with some of the guys. They are wild and crazy though, just to warn ya,” he laughed.

“Okay,” she agreed. I nearly jumped out of my skin with excitement.

What better way to start off the year than in love?

Chapter Twenty-Five

Isaac

“Okay, so you’re right,” I laughed as I watched my best friend and partner leave together. I wasn’t sure I liked the idea of them together, especially if things didn’t work out. I’d spend the rest of my life listening to how the other one sucks, and possibly the one pining for the other. Fuck that!

Maddie stood at the front door, leaning on it as she closed it behind our guests. I couldn’t believe how lucky I was to have someone like her love me. Her hair was pinned up in a messy bun, she had gravy splatters on her pretty white blouse, and there were no signs of exhaustion showing, even though I knew she had to be tired.

“Thank you for my gift,” I praised, still in awe that she’d gone to so much trouble for me.

“I wanted you to have the Christmas like the ones you told me about,” she smiled, her left dimple pushing deep into her cheek.

“I haven’t given you your gift yet,” I noted.

“You’ve given me so much already; what else is there?” she giggled as her cheeks turned a beautiful shade of pink.

I walked towards the door, pinning her between my arms, and lowered my mouth to hers. Those sexy red lips drove me wild, and it felt like an eternity since I’d tasted them. I pulled back just as her hands gripped my waist. There was time for that, and I was going to make damn sure it was special, just in case it was our last time.

“First,” I whispered, taking her hand and pulling her gently into the front room. I motioned for her to sit on the couch while I got her gift from the other room. “Close your eyes,” I ordered and then brought the small box into the room. I knelt down in front of her, placing my hands on her knees, and the gift in her lap. “Open them,” I instructed.

Her baby blues stared at the box, wrapped with plain gold paper and a silver bow. “You shouldn’t have,” she smiled softly, lifting her eyes to mine. They were filled with love, pure love. I wanted to remember that look forever. That look she gave me right then, that would carry me through this life, and the eternity thereafter.

“Go ahead, open it,” I urged.

The palms of my hands were growing sweaty, and then my hands started to shake as she removed the bow. Her fingers carefully found the crease in the paper, and she slid a long fingernail across the tape, releasing the package from its binding. I stared at the little brown book with the gold lock on her lap, suddenly terrified that I’d given her something so personal.

“What is it?” she asked, her eyes filled with confusion.

I swallowed hard enough that it was audible. My throat was drying up as I looked up at her and those baby blues. “I know I can’t give you your own memories back,” I started. I cleared my throat and took a deep breath before finishing. “But, I’ve loved you my entire life. I know boys aren’t supposed to have diaries, so let’s call it a journal. I’ve written in it since third grade, when we met. The last entry ever made was after your trip here, just as friends. It will tell you who you were, who you are. The entire book, except one or two other love interests, which I urge you to skip reading, is about you.” I gasped for air. My throat was beginning to close again. Why did I give her that? What made me think she’d want some obsessed little boy’s diary—excuse me—journal, especially since I wrote in it as an adult as well, all about my obsession for Maddie.

Tears fell from her eyes so hard they skipped her cheek and bounced onto her lap, and the book. “This is so sweet,” she gasped, wrapping her arms around me tightly while she sobbed, with what I hoped were tears of joy.

“You don’t think I’m weird?” I whispered in her ear.

“I think you’re amazing,” she boasted, squeezing me tightly into her chest.

Her fingers ran through my short strands of hair, instantly giving me goosebumps all over my skin. That tingling sensation started to explode throughout my body, and soon the blood that had been pumping my heart so fast and hard moved south, enlarging another area of my body.

“You need a bath,” I whispered, standing, and gently pulling her up by her hand.

I guided her upstairs where I’d already had candles placed all around the room. I started the oversized tub, lit the candles, and stripped out of my clothes. I loved how Maddie’s eyes lingered on my cock with such enthusiasm. I helped her undress, slowly sliding her clothes away from her body.

I helped her into the tub and then slid in behind her, letting my erection press into her back as she leaned against me.

Her skin was like silk as my hands caressed her fingers, up her arms, to her shoulders, and then forward to her breasts. I closed my eyes as my hands traced her entire body, embedding her silhouette deep into my memory. Her body melted into me, totally relaxed as I ran the soapy loofah across the places I’d just traced. She exhaled, pushing more of her weight onto me, and increasing my arousal as the rough loofah grazed her hardened nipples.

I reached behind me and hit the jets on low, filling the tub with bubbles from the small amount I’d added before we’d started our soak. Her in my arms like this, I could do it forever. I wanted nothing more than for this very moment never to end.

“Tell me something you wrote in your journal,” Maddie requested.

“Wouldn’t you rather read it?” I asked.

“No, I want to hear it in your voice,” she insisted. I reached for the journal that was placed just behind me on the shelf. “Just open any page,” she instructed.

It had been so long since I’d even looked at what I’d written, it was a little intimidating to just pick something so random. Her head turned, looking up at me as I opened the book. She turned back around, nuzzling in my chest as I started to read.

“Keep in mind, this entry is from when I was only fifteen,” I chuckled.

“Okay, so I was thirteen?” she asked.

“Yes,” I replied.

“Maddie’s hair blew like strands of gold on the track field. I wasn’t sure if she came to watch me, or Doug Kline, as we both were competing for the top spot on the team, and most of the school was there to watch. She kept pushing her hair back away from her face, giving me a glimpse of the most beautiful blue eyes, but just for a split second as the wind would roll through again. My heart was pounding so hard, and we hadn’t even started the race yet… wow, I was a corny little dude,” I chuckled.

Maddie’s hand reached between her legs and pushed behind her to my cock, her fingers clamped around my erection, playfully dragging the pre-cum from the tip, and using it to slide her hand up and down my shaft.

I dropped the book behind me, gripping her breasts, and rocking my hips with the motion of her hand. The jets were blasting into my backside, tickling my skin and creating a strange excitement throughout my body.

My fingers reached between her legs, sliding between her swollen lips and spreading them open as one worked its way inside. Sweet moans escaped her lips, her hand worked harder and faster at pleasing me manually, but I needed her to stop. “I want to try something,” I suggested.

She hummed and then squeezed my cock hard in her hand. Oh hell, I can’t take much more.

I pulled my finger from inside of her and pulled her back centered on my chest. My lips sucked on her neck, her earlobe, and then slid to her soft cheek. My hands were massaging the inside of her thighs as I moved her towards one of the tub jets. “Can I?” I whispered in her ear.

“Yes,” she gasped, her body squirming on top of me, grinding her flesh into my cock.

I shifted our position, turning us sideways in the tub and opening her legs directly in front of one of the larger jets. The water pushed hard from the jets, but only rippled as it neared her warm pussy.

My hands pulled her up higher on my chest so I could see her beautiful butterfly unfolded and pink just above the water. Fuck, that’s a pretty pussy.

I moved forward, closer and closer to the jet. The water pressure increased with every inch I moved. Her moans were growing louder and her body twitching as I pushed her ass down into the water, level with the jet, and just a few inches from the strong force.

Her back arched, lifting her tits from the water’s surface, and her moans turned into wild cries of ecstasy. “Do you like that?” I whispered in her ear.

I pulled my hands out from under her, letting her hold herself in place. The stream blasted into her body, spreading her open, and circling her clit in one motion. My hands moved to her breasts, playfully tugging on them as my mouth teased her neck with kisses.

Maddie’s legs slammed shut at the knees with a violent force, and her back pushed hard into my chest. Suddenly she shook, pulsated, and let out one loud moan after another. I let my fingers trail to her pussy so I could feel the powerful contractions from her orgasm.

Her head fell back against my chest, and she worked on calming her breathing. I lowered her back into the water, turning her way from the jet, and rolled her around to face me. The look in her eyes was wildly satisfied. Her lips parted, and I knew she was about to say something. Something that I’d been dying to hear.

Chapter Twenty-Six

Maddie

Isaac’s mouth was lowering to mine, but I couldn’t let him stop me from what I wanted to say, what I needed to say. “I love you,” I uttered, breathless from the powerful orgasm rocking aftershocks through my body.

He paused, his eyes wide and filled with what looked like pain. My heart raced and my breathing picked back up its rapid rhythm as his mouth lowered to mine. His lips were gentle, delicate, and sensual as they clamped onto mine, sucking them into his mouth, and them coming back for more.

My entire body relaxed in his arms. “I love you too, I always have, and I always will,” he whispered, his eyes still filled with pain.

“I want to be inside of you,” he growled as he gripped my hips and pulled them upward on his body. My ass cheeks rested on his hard chest, his cock resting on his belly button, hard and threatening penetration. “Grip it. Guide me inside you,” he gasped.

I wrapped my hand around his large cock, sliding up and down his slippery shaft as he began sliding me down towards it. I did as he instructed, guiding him inside of me, but he stopped just at the tip. I wanted to push my hips down and swallow him whole, but he held me in place, teasing me. “Please,” I moaned, pushing myself down his slippery chest another inch and him inside of me another inch as well. It wasn’t enough; I wanted more. “Fuck me,” I whispered, leaning my head back onto his shoulder and letting my hot breath blow against his ear. Oh yeah, there was that growl, that groan of excitement I’d been waiting to hear.

“You drive me wild,” he gasped, pushing me down his chest like it was a slip and slide and burying his cock deep inside my warm cunt.

My ass cheeks slid up and down his belly as his hands gripped my tits for traction. I rocked my hips into him as water splashed violently around us. The position was different, awkward at first, me on my back, lying on top of him, but once we found the rhythm, it gave him perfect access to my G-spot with his slight curve.

Sensations of electricity blasted through my body, exiting at all my erogenous zones. I pushed harder and faster against him, splashing water out of the tub and onto the floor. Just like the waves in the tub, waves of pleasure rolled over my body as my second orgasm took flight, sending me over the edge of ecstasy as my cum spurt from my body so forcefully it shot across the tub as he pulled out of me.

“Wow,” I gasped, barely able to move as Isaac shifted in the tub. He stood up, allowing me to sink down into the warmer water and soothe my body from the chill. I watched as he dried off, his cock still hard and unsatisfied. “Your turn,” I grinned, staring up at him with my best bedroom eyes. He grinned, obviously ready for his own release. He extended his hand, helped me from the water, and quickly wrapped me in a large plush towel.

He guided me into the bedroom and instructed me to get under the covers and get warm; he’d be right back. Where is he going?

I snuggled under the blankets where it was nice and warm and waited for Isaac to return. My body tingled all over, and my mind was racing with thoughts of my future with Isaac. My memories would return, I was confident of that, but having this closeness with him, this connection, it didn’t seem like such a stressor anymore. I was ready to move on; the past would eventually catch up to me, so no sense waiting around for it.

Isaac returned to the room holding a wooden tray. As he carried it to the bed, I notice left-overs from our Christmas meal. “I noticed you didn’t eat much at dinner, and you worked too hard not to enjoy it,” he smiled.

He set the tray on the nightstand and sat on the bed. “Is everything okay?” he asked, his eyes narrowing on me.

“Yes,” I whispered, sliding over to his side of the bed. My mouth was watering for what was beneath his towel, ready to please him the way he’d pleased me.

“Aren’t you hungry?” he chuckled as my hand slid under his towel.

The warmth of his cock settled on my palm, and I could feel him getting hard again. “I am,” I whispered, my eyes lifting to his as I spoke.

A soft growl rolled from his throat as he arched back. I slowly worked my hand up and down his shaft as it hardened beneath my fingers. Isaac reached down, letting his fingers roll through my hair, gently guiding my mouth towards his erection.

My lips parted, slowly surrounding the head of his cock. I sucked hard, creating another growl from Isaac. His excitement pleased me, sending tingles of arousal between my legs.

I released the suction from my jaws, loosening my mouth muscles as I worked on devouring his large cock. My hand slid beneath his balls, holding them gently in the palm of my hand while my fingers playfully massaged them. The flavor of his flesh was driving me wild as my tongue slid along the enlarged vein of his shaft.

Isaac gripped my hair tight in his hand, gently guiding me with a steady motion. It was obvious he wasn’t able to take much more. I wanted to taste his warm come sliding down my throat, but his grip tightened further, and his body tensed as it pulled back from my grip. I moaned to show my displeasure and sucked onto him as he slowly pulled away.

My pussy was throbbing, wet and aching for him to be inside of me. My mouth loosened its grip as my body fell back onto the bed. Isaac’s eyes were devilish, sexy, and filled with a hunger I’d never seen before.

He fumbled in the drawer next to the bed as his cock stood attention, aimed for my readied body. As he slid on the condom he’d finally found and opened in the drawer, I gasped for breath in excitement. His eyes filled with a wild anticipation as he lowered himself onto the bed, atop my breathless and anxious body.

“I love you,” he whispered the sweetest words I’d ever heard.

My head fell back as my back arched, pushing my breasts against his warm chest. His mouth devoured the flesh of my neck, sucking hard as I gasped and moaned. “I love you too,” I whispered in his ear.

His head lifted, and his eyes dug deep into my soul as he positioned himself between my legs. I quivered with arousal, anxious for the feeling of him filling my body. He paused, teasing me as I squirmed beneath him, the look in his eyes letting me know he was arroused by my eagerness.

“You want me?” he asked, his voice raspy and deep.

“Yes,” I purred, pushing my ass from the mattress as I tried to force him into my throbbing pussy.

His strong arms wrapped around me, holding me tight as he rocked his hips into mine. My legs parted, my hips spread, and with a skillful thrust, he was deep inside of my body. As he settled in place, not moving, we both sounded winded from the anticipation of feeling one another.

Isaac slowly began moving, his hips rolling with a steady motion into me. My body froze beneath him for a moment as it acclimated to the large muscle pushing into it. I was pinned to the mattress by his large cock, his strong arms, and his passion. There was no other place I’d rather be at that moment, and in that moment, I felt there was no other place I’d rather be, ever.

Our eyes locked as my body relaxed. We found a rhythm between us, our bodies becoming one with each thrust. My memory may have been lost, or at least very faded in the depths of my mind, but my heart felt everything, everything I imagined it had felt before the accident. I loved this man, and it was obvious he loved me, and if my memory never fully returned, at least I had this feeling. At least I had Isaac.

My mind was in a daydream, my heart swelling hard against my chest. Isaac’s body was warm against mine, and as my orgasm approached without much warning, the pace of his thrusts began to pick up. His breathing grew rapid as his lips parted and lowered to mine. As our tongues entangled, our orgasms exploded in unison as if perfectly choreographed.

The weight of his body fell onto mine, crushing me for a split second before he rolled to his side. His arms gripped me tightly, pulling me with him. His cock remained inside of me, my body not willing to release it just yet as I caught my breath against the fast beat of his heart tapping at my cheek. Yes, I loved this man. This was a feeling that felt familiar to me.

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Isaac

Beth startled me as she stepped out of the small break room in my office. “What are you doing here?” I gasped, trying to hide the fact she’d scared me.

“I didn’t have anything else to do, so I figured I’d get caught up on paperwork. Why are you here?” she asked.

I set my briefcase down by my feet and leaned against the wall. Her eyes lingered on mine, questioning, judging. I could feel her disapproval, and I knew there’d be plenty more once I told her how close Maddie and I had become. “I just wanted to make sure I didn’t have any loose ends before I headed to Portland,” I explained.

“So, you’re actually going?” she asked with a relief in her voice that made me uneasy.

I didn’t want to, but I’d promised. If there was any way to get out of it, I would. “I don’t think I can put it off any longer,” I sighed.

“Well, it’s the right thing to do,” she smiled.

Was it the right thing to do? Maddie was happy. I was happy. All this trip was going to do was make us both miserable. “I suppose,” I grumbled.

“Maybe things will be okay,” she encouraged, even though her tone told me she didn’t think it possible. It wasn’t going to be okay. Maddie was going to find out that I’d lied to her, and even though I was only protecting her, there would be no way she’d ever truly believe that. I am fucked.

Beth sat down in the chair by her desk, her eyes reading me thoroughly as she pursed her lips. “Why don’t you tell her, before you go?” she suggested.

“I can’t,” I protested.

“Look, things have gotten out of control, but that doesn’t mean you can’t at least explain yourself. Maybe she’ll understand in time,” she offered.

“What if she never remembers? Wouldn’t I be doing her a favor by not telling her?” I asked.

“She’ll remember. She’s already started having memories, and you know what the doctor’s said: it’s just a matter of time,” Beth scolded.

“I hate to lose her,” I sighed, slouching against the wall.

“I know you love her,” Beth sighed.

I fought back the tear trying to push from my eye and forced a faint smile. “She told me she loved me,” I admitted.

Beth’s face was filled with shock. “Isaac, you can’t continue this any longer,” she insisted.

I knew she was right. I hated that I’d let things get this far out of hand. The man, Rob, waiting on her in Portland, was a horrible man, and I couldn’t bear for her to end up in his clutches. She’d come here to get away, to start a new life, and that’s what she’d done. We were in love. We were happy.

Beth clutched her mug of coffee, bringing it to her lips slowly as she eyed me for a reaction. I smiled, nodded, and then picked up my briefcase as I moved into my private office.

I opened the safe, took out Maddie’s phone and held the button on the side until it lit up and turned on. There were a couple more texts from Rob, demanding to know where she was. The last text I’d sent, the one I made look like it was from Maddie, saying to leave her alone. It was obvious he wasn’t taking the hint so easily. The voicemail was full, all from Rob’s number, but I couldn’t bear to listen to his voice, so I shut the phone back off and shoved it into my briefcase. Once we arrived in Portland, I’d give her the phone back before I left her for good. She wouldn’t want to come back with me, not after finding out I’d lied. I knew that for certain.

There really wasn’t much for me to do at the office, but I wasn’t ready to go back home. I started packing up the Christmas decorations as Beth walked into my office. “You know it’s bad luck to take down the decorations before the new year,” she smirked.

“Thanks for the warning,” I chuckled, pushing a thick pine garland into the plastic container.

“There’s a bad storm on the move,” she advised.

I looked up, watching her eyes leave pity on me. “Oh yeah?” I asked half-heartedly. I wasn’t in the mood for small talk, especially about the weather.

“The weatherman was saying it could be as much as twelve inches in just a few hours,” she added.

“Rain?” I questioned.

“Snow,” she said slowly.

“In Miami?” I chuckled at the thought of snow hitting Miami.

“Portland,” she corrected.

My heart raced at the thought it may be too bad to travel. “So, are flights canceled?” I queried, trying not to act too excited.

“I don’t know,” she shrugged. “But, this may give you more time to tell her. It’s not too late.”

I shoved the last of the decorations into the container and grabbed my briefcase. “I gotta go,” I exclaimed, rushing from the office in haste.

Maddie was on the beach when I arrived home. I watched her walking across the sand, bending occasionally, to pick up sea shells I assumed. She had started quite the collection since she arrived, all cleaned and displayed in a large ceramic bowl on the counter in the kitchen.

I turned on the TV, clicked to the weather station, and sat as my eyes glued to the screen. The weatherman gave the local updates, sunny, warm, yadda yadda yadda. Get on with it!

Yes, a large storm was rolling through Washington and Oregon was expected to be hit hard, harder than they’d been hit in decades. I heard the door open, and soon Maddie’s warm hand was on my shoulder.

“When did you get home?” she asked.

“Just a few minutes ago,” I turned to smile in her direction. Her eyes were so pure, so beautiful. I couldn’t lose her. I just couldn’t. “Looks like the weather is getting bad,” I pointed to the screen.

A map was displayed showing the vicious storm headed straight for her hometown. “Can we still fly?” she asked.

“We’ll have to wait and see what happens,” I said as solemnly as I could muster.

She looked so disappointed as she slid onto the couch next to me. Her hand rested on my knee as her head leaned against my shoulder. “I hope we can,” she sighed.

I struggled with Beth’s suggestion. Should I tell her? Would it be better than her finding out on her own? I swallowed hard, pressed my hand against hers and felt my heart ripping from my chest as I contemplated what to do.

She lifted her head from my shoulder and stretched her lips to my neck. The warmth of her kiss melted me into her. “I love you,” she whispered.

I turned my hand upward to grip hers, squeezing it tightly as I fought back my pain. If the flight is canceled, I’ll tell her. It felt as though it was fate giving me a second chance.

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Maddie

Isaac had been glued to the weather station for the last two days, watching the storm as it threatened to delay our trip. By the time it hit Portland, it was minimal, only leaving a few inches of snow on the ground. Flights were scheduled without any delays or interruptions, and I was finally going to get the answers I so desperately needed.

Isaac lifted my suitcase from the trunk of the cab and set it on the pavement. I stared into the airport, watching people rushing to and from their destinations. My heart filled with an anxiety that I couldn’t explain. I was going home, but it felt more like I was leaving home. I’d gotten used to being at Isaac’s house, and it scared me to leave now that we were actually on our way. What will I find in Portland? What if there is nothing there that will jar my memory?

“You ready?” he asked, pulling me from my trance.

“Yes,” I smiled, taking the small bag he handed me.

Our luggage was light. I didn’t have much to begin with, and the items I’d purchased while in Miami weren’t exactly suitable for a Portland winter. We walked into the airport and my chest instantly tightened. People scurried around me, bumping into my arm as I followed Isaac towards the ticket counter.

“Are you sure the flights are still scheduled for Portland?” he asked the lady at the counter. She had gray hair tightly wrapped into a bun on top of her head, her lips were painted bright red, and didn’t offer any sign of a smile as she nodded towards Isaac.

Isaac didn’t seem to be satisfied with her answer as he let out a loud sigh. He handed her two IDs, one of which I assumed was mine. She checked them and then handed them back. He quickly shoved them into his wallet before I could ask to see them. 

He took my hand and led me through the security, where he handed them the tickets and then dug out the IDs from his pocket once again. I stretched to see them as the woman at the small podium checked them. I noticed my picture, assuring me that it was indeed my ID. I hadn’t seen that since I’d been in Miami, and was still under the impression that they were lost, along with my entire wallet.

“Where did you get that?” I asked as he shoved it back into his pocket with his own.

The woman ushered us through where we were instructed to take off our shoes and walk forward. Isaac grabbed a gray tub and started unloading his pockets of everything except the cards.

“Get what?” he asked.

“My ID,” I questioned.

He didn’t answer, only smiled and then walked through the large x-ray machine that scanned him for bombs, guns, or any other contraband that he may have tried to smuggle onto the plane.

“Isaac,” I pushed, insisting on an answer.

“Move along,” a chubby man ordered, motioning me through the same machine Isaac just passed through.

Isaac grabbed his shoes and handed me mine. We sat at the small stadium style bench seats and reorganized our belongings.

“I had it made,” he said quickly, not making eye contact as he spoke.

He took my hand and walked me through the airport quickly towards our gate, not offering any more details.

“What do you mean you had it made?” I asked.

“It’s not a legal ID. I have my ways; just stop, please. You want to be able to fly to Portland, don’t you?” he whispered.

I knew Isaac was a private detective, and he’d been a Navy SEAL for years, so his explanation seemed rational. I did want to fly to Portland, and without an ID, that couldn’t happen. I slid my hand into his, leaned into him as we entered our gate, and let myself fill with appreciation that he did what was necessary to make this trip happen for me.

We boarded the plane and took our seats. We were just behind the emergency doors, causing me to become anxious. The flight attendant explained to the people in front of us their responsibility in case of an accident as I listened nervously.

“It’s going to be okay,” Isaac assured me.

I wanted to believe him, but there was a knot in my gut that I couldn’t expel.

As the plane taxied down the runway, my heart raced. The wheels lifted from the pavement, and with that, we were off to my past, my future, to my missing pieces.

Isaac leaned back into his seat, stretching his legs out as far as he could in front of him. I was too anxious to sleep, but I tried to relax as we soared through the sky.

My eyes finally closed, and I felt myself drift into a restless slumber. Snow was falling, and I was standing in front of a large brick building. A man was with me, tall, with dark hair, and it looked as if we were arguing. His hands were flying through the air and tears were streaming down my face. Anxiety filled my veins as I struggled to see his face, to find out if it was the same man I’d dreamt about before, but I couldn’t. He grabbed me, shoving me into the wall, his hand on my neck so tight I couldn’t breathe as I struggled to cry out for help.

“Maddie,” I turned to see Isaac, his eyes filled with fear and his face pale. “You were dreaming,” he whispered, gripping my hand tightly into his.

“It was horrible,” I gasped, still feeling the pressure on my throat from the stranger’s hands. I knew it wasn’t a stranger. I wasn’t mugged. I wasn’t attacked by some random person. I knew this man. I was certain of that.

“It’s probably just your nerves. The doctor said your memories would come back in strange ways,” Isaac assured me.

“We’ll be making a quick stop in Boise due to a new storm. I apologize for the delay and hope it will be a short one. Please take your seats, buckle up, and we’ll be landing shortly,” the pilot's voice sounded over the intercom.

Isaac sat up, his tall frame straight and tense. My palms started to sweat as I realized I wasn’t sure I wanted to go to Portland at all. Whatever was there wasn’t good. Is it a secret I’ve hidden from Isaac?

His hand squeezed around mine as he offered me a nervous smile. “Looks like the storms came back through after all,” he said.

He’d been following them every day on the weather channel, telling me twice he thought we should change the date of our trip. I wasn’t willing to budge then, wanting nothing more than to get to my lost life. Now, I wasn’t sure that was the best thing for either of us, and the delay was welcomed.

Turbulence bounced the plane, causing me to gasp. Isaac wrapped his arm around me and pulled me into his side. He made me feel safe and protected. Whatever the memories were in my dreams, they made me feel scared and alone.

The plane finally landed, and the flight attendant instructed everyone to remove their belongings and exit the plane. Isaac grabbed our overhead baggage and slid out of the seat. He stopped the flow of people in the aisle as I worked on getting out of my seat. I felt his hand on the small of my back as we exited into the Boise airport.

“Are you hungry?” he asked.

I was starving. I nodded and followed him towards a small café with dim lights inside. We’d left that morning, and it was already past lunch, so my stomach grumbled at the aroma of the food cooking as a hostess with a strong accent showed us to our table. “How long do you think we’ll be stuck here?” I asked while scanning the menu placed in front of me.

“Hopefully not long,” he said, his tone not as confident as usual.

A perky waitress appeared, her red hair filled with loose curls and her lips painted to match. “What can I get ya?” she asked.

“A turkey club and water, please,” I smiled as I handed her my menu. Isaac ordered a burger, something I’d told him to cut down on. I gave him a disappointed look as he grinned in my direction.

“I like burgers,” he smirked.

I shook my head, half-laughing as I gave up the argument on his diet. He looked great, his body was tight and toned, he was exercising more, and he wasn’t even winded when we took our last run together. One burger wouldn’t hurt.

Our conversation was weak, mainly sticking to the topic of the weather. It was obvious he was nervous, but I wasn’t sure why. I knew why I was nervous.

I ate my food like it was my last meal once it was pushed in front of me. Isaac teased me with a smirk as he wiped mayonnaise from my chin.

After we had eaten, we checked in at the gate, noticing our flight still holding a delayed status. “How much longer until we are back in the air?” Isaac asked.

“We are sorry for the inconvenience. The flight is delayed until tomorrow morning at the earliest. Please take this voucher as a token of our apologies,” the woman said, pushing an envelope towards Isaac.

He turned to me, his face pale and his demeanor anxious. “Looks like we’re getting a hotel,” he smiled.

A strange relief fell over me as I followed him from the airport. He hailed a cab, holding the door for me, and then slid in next to me in the back seat. The driver informed us the airport hotel was booked due to the delayed flights. Isaac got on his phone as we drove towards town and found a vacancy at a hotel just a few miles from the airport.

Isaac helped the driver unload our baggage and then headed into the hotel with me just behind him. The man at the front desk took the vouchers the airport had given us, and then Isaac’s credit card and ID. “I’m sorry this is causing so much trouble,” I whispered as the man worked on getting us a room key.

“It’s not your fault; it’s just fate,” he half-chuckled nervously.

The man handed Isaac the key and explained the easiest way to get to our room. “Thank you,” Isaac smiled, and then pushed his hand onto the small of my back, leading me towards the elevators.

I didn’t know what to say as we took the ride up to our room, so I didn’t say anything at all. The doors opened, and Isaac pulled the baggage down the hall towards the room that matched our key.

Inside, the room was decorated in bright blue. It was cheery, clean, and all I cared about was the bed I wanted to climb into.

“You want to shower?” Isaac asked.

I shook my head and moved towards the bed. I pulled down the comforter and kicked off my shoes. “I just want to take a nap,” I squeaked, falling onto the soft mattress.

Isaac leaned down and kissed me on the forehead as he covered me with the thin sheet. My eyes fell closed quickly from the stress and exhaustion of the trip. I knew tonight I wasn’t going to find out what secrets, mysteries, and horrors were waiting for me in Portland. Maybe tomorrow I’d be strong enough to face the demons that haunted my dreams.

Chapter Twenty- Nine

Isaac

Maddie was sleeping peacefully, finally. I wondered if it was memories of her abusive ex coming back to torment her dreams. I slid into the bed next to her, careful not to wake her, and turned on the TV. The storm hitting Portland was bad, the heavy snow they anticipated days ago finally arriving with a vengeance.

Maybe we could turn back, call the trip off, and we could stay happy together forever.

“What time is it?” Maddie mumbled, turning to face me with sleepy eyes.

“It’s almost midnight,” I answered, my heart swelling with regret and remorse as she looked up at me. “Are you hungry?”

“I am,” she said, sliding herself up against the headboard and out of the cocoon she’d made from the thin sheet.

“I ordered pizza earlier. It’s probably still warm,” I offered, sliding from the bed to retrieve the box I’d left on the table.

Her eyes lit up as I brought the box to the bed. I slid back in next to her, opened the lid, and watched as she selected the piece she wanted. “Oh my God, this is so good,” she groaned, chewing her first bite.

“The weather is still bad,” I said, hoping she’d retreat from her mission to destroy our relationship.

“Hopefully it clears up soon,” she smiled nervously. I wrapped my arm around her as she continued devouring her slice of pizza from the only place I could find that delivered to the hotel. “I know you have to get back to work. If it doesn’t clear up, we can reschedule,” she said sweetly.

Her words were like music to my ears.

Maddie sat up, staring at the TV as a gym commercial came on. “I used to get the most amazing veggie pizza at the place right by my gym,” she blurted. “My gym?”

My body tensed as she stared at me, her eyes filled with hope and confusion. “Did I have a gym?” she asked.

She didn’t have a gym, but Rob did. That’s where she’d worked before arriving in Miami, the place she’d walked away from, the life she’d left behind. My heart ached as I realized her memory would indeed return, with or without her trip to Portland. I needed to tell her the truth, and if I was going to, this was the time. I froze.

“Did I ever say anything about a gym?” she asked me, her eyes still filled with that same hopeful confusion.

“Yes. You taught a class at a gym near your apartment,” I admitted, leaving out the details that may have led to the truth.

Her smile widened as she reached for another piece of pizza. It was obvious her memory gave her hope. It destroyed any hope I’d ever had.

Maddie slid into my arm, slouching down onto the mattress and stared at the TV. “Maybe going to the gym will jog a few more memories,” she said sleepily.

I pulled her close, letting the scent of her perfume waft under my nose. My phone beeped with a message on the table beside the bed. I reached to grab it, trying not to disturb Maddie. “It’s the airport update,” I announced as I read the message.

“Looks like the flight has not been rescheduled for tomorrow after all,” I sighed with both exhaustion and relief.

“We have to stay here another day?” she mumbled.

“Looks like that may be the case,” I replied, hoping to hear her say ‘let’s just go home,' but instead only soft rumbles escaped her throat as she drifted back into a deep sleep.

I held my phone tight in my hand, pondering what this all meant. Was this a sign? Was it fate telling me to come clean, giving one last chance to hopefully save the relationship that meant so much to me?

My eyes grew heavy, and soon they closed, but my mind played through scenarios of how I would tell Maddie, how she’d react, and what would happen if I didn’t tell her.

My eyes opened as the light of the day slammed into the hotel room. Maddie was still asleep, obviously exhausted from the botched trip. I slid out of bed, careful not to wake her, and moved towards the door. There was a small café up the street, so I figured I could call Elijah for advice on what to do while grabbing Maddie an ice coffee drink.

I stood on the sidewalk in front of the café with my phone to my ear. It rang several times, and I was ready to hang up when I heard Elijah’s voice.

“Hey, Isaac,” he greeted me. I swallowed hard before speaking, and then dumped the entire story in his lap. I could hear him breathing as I waited for his reply. “Sounds like you’ve got a good opportunity to tell her,” he finally replied. That wasn’t what I wanted to hear, but it was what I expected.

“Okay, but should I come back to Miami first?” I asked.

“I don’t know if you should wait any longer,” Elijah warned.

I took a deep breath, studied his warnings, and realized he might be right. If I waited, I’d only back out again, and her memories were starting to come back. There might not even be enough time to wait. If they came back before I explained everything to her, she’d for sure run from me forever.

“Okay. You’re right,” I exhaled.

“Where are you now?” he asked.

“Boise,” I told him, and then gave him the name of the hotel when he asked. “Hold on,” I sighed, looking at the message that buzzed my phone. “The flight is rescheduled for this afternoon now,” I gasped.

“Isaac, you really need to tell her before you get on that plane,” he insisted.

“I’ll call you back and let you know what’s going on.” I hung up the phone and tried to steady my thoughts. They were flying through my head at a million miles an hour, making me dizzy and nauseous.

I went inside the café, ordered Maddie’s iced coffee, a hot coffee for me, and then two breakfast specials to go. There wasn’t much time to make it to the plane, so we wouldn’t have time to stop and eat. This was going to have to wait until we arrived in Portland. There wasn’t time to explain everything, and she’d never forgive me if I messed up her chance to get home. I’d already been selfish enough; this time I was going to have to think of what was best for Maddie. She needed to get home, and she deserved the truth, so she’d have both in a few hours.

Chapter Thirty

Maddie

I rolled towards Isaac in the bed, but he was gone. The sheets were messed up where he’d been sleeping, and his pillow was folded in half. I wiped my eyes, stretched, and got out of bed. The hotel room was small and had only one bathroom, which was empty. I figured he must’ve left to get coffee, or maybe he was strolling around the lobby just to stretch his legs. Since the flight wasn’t scheduled for this morning, I figured I might as well get a shower so we could start our day.

My thoughts were leaning towards going back to Miami, postponing the Portland trip for another time, maybe after my memory returned and I could figure out what was scaring me so bad about returning to what I once called home.

The small carry-on bag that Isaac packed was on the chair, unzipped, and I could see my makeup bag shoved in the bottom. I reached inside and pulled the small floral bag out, accidentally dumping the entire bag onto the floor. As I picked it up, scooping up the contents of Isaac’s personal belongings and shoving them back inside, a small black phone caught my eye. I knew it wasn’t Isaac’s; his was almost as large as a small tablet. This was thin, petite, and had a rose-colored case on the back. It was more like a phone that a woman would carry, not a man.

I held the button on the side until it turned on. The background was a large sun, bright yellow, and strangely familiar. Is this my phone? Why does he have it? Why hasn’t he given it to me?

It buzzed in my hand, alerting me there were unread messages or unanswered calls. I slid my finger across the messages icon and sat on the edge of the bed. Dozens upon dozens of texts were sent from someone named Rob. My eyes widened as I read them, mostly asking where I was by name, begging me to call, to answer my phone, and asking just to hear my voice so he knew I was safe. Who was this man? Why did he care if I was safe?

I opened the voicemails, listened to the frantic voice begging for me to call, to answer, and then the same voice as it turned angry and irritated, threatening whoever had my phone that he would find them, find me. I knew that voice, but I still didn’t know how or why.

All of the texts and calls were from the same man. I scrolled back up through them, reading and re-reading them until I noticed one that looked as if I’d sent it. My eyes scanned the text knowing I hadn’t sent it, so who did?

I hit the call button, held the phone to my ear, and listened as it rang. “Maddie!” the voice called out on the other end of the phone with a panicked excitement.

“Who is this?” I asked.

“Maddie, it's Rob, your fiancé,” the familiar voice claimed.

“No. That’s not possible. Isaac is my fiancé,” I explained, not doing well to convince myself, let alone the panicked man on the other end of the phone.

“Where are you? Has someone hurt you?” he gasped.

“No. I was in an accident. How do you know me?” I asked, hoping for a new answer.

“I told you, I’m your fiancé. What kind of accident? Are you okay?” he asked.

I didn’t speak as I tried to make sense of this conversation, this ridiculous claim from the man on the other end of the phone. “Maddie, where are you, and are you okay?” the man asked again.

“I’m in Boise. I’m okay, just confused,” I explained.

“I’ve been looking for you for weeks. I knew you wouldn’t just disappear like that, without a trace,” the man ranted.

“I didn’t disappear. I was in Miami, and I got hit by a car. My memory is gone, mostly, some, I mean. I’m getting it back a little,” I rambled.

“Your memory?” the man sighed and then paused. I could hear him swallow, and his breathing became rapid as he held on to the phone.

“I think you’re in danger. You need to get out of there, call the cops if you have to, but get out,” he ordered.

“I’m not in any danger. I’m with Isaac, my fiancé,” I protested.

“Get away from him,” the man’s voice turned loud and irritated. The familiarity of the tone was strong, and suddenly my gut told me this was the man I knew, he was the one from my dreams. Tears began streaming down my face as my hands shook. Why was this happening, and who was this? Was he telling me the truth, and Isaac was really lying to me?

“Maddie. Please, if you can get away, run. I’ll get you home to me,” he said softly.

“He’ll probably be back any minute,” I sobbed.

“Then please leave while you can. Call the cops,” he insisted.

“I don’t want to call the cops. Isaac knows me, he has proof, he showed me pictures of when we were kids,” I explained.

“I’m begging you, Maddie, get out of there,” the man pleaded.

“I don’t have much money, or even an ID; he has it,” I groaned.

“Get a cab, take it to the bus station. You don’t need ID for a ticket. Call me when you get there, and I’ll pay for your ticket,” he pleaded.

“Okay,” I sighed, hanging up the phone.

I was in a panic. Who was telling me the truth: this guy, or Isaac? My pictures in my phone showed me and the dark-haired man from my dream, tons of them. We looked happy, and in one I noticed the ring I wore on my finger. Oh, my God, I have to get out of here. Isaac truly wasn’t who he said he was.

I grabbed my suitcase and rushed from the room. The man at the front desk called me a cab, and I asked him to please not tell the man I was with where I’d gone. He looked confused but agreed. I waited for the cab in the back parking lot of the hotel where I told him I’d be waiting.

My heart raced. This can’t be real, can it?

A yellow cab pulled up, and I quickly got into the backseat. I had no idea where a bus station was, or if there even was one. I just needed out of there. “Is there a bus station nearby?” I asked the cabby.

He nodded and pulled out of the hotel parking lot, leaving Isaac and any thoughts of a life with him behind.

I stared out the window as we drove down the road, almost certain I saw Isaac carrying a bag walking down the street. Tears flowed from my eyes, and my heart ached. He made me love him, whoever he was.

We pulled into the bus station lot. My hands shook as I dialed Rob’s number again. He answered quickly, his voice filled with anxiety. “Are you at the bus station?” he asked frantically.

“I’m here,” I admitted.

He had me hand the phone to the lady at the ticket counter so he could pay for my ticket with his credit card. She gave me an odd look, one of confusion and pity, but handed me the printed ticket and my phone.

“The bus leaves in twenty minutes,” he sighed with relief.

“How far away am I?” I asked, not really knowing where I was.

“The bus ride will be close to ten hours. You’ll be home tonight,” he assured me.

“Thank you,” I said.

“Why did you go to Miami?” he asked, his tone very different than before.

“I don’t know,” I admitted.

“We’ll discuss all that when you get home,” he said with a hint of frustration in his voice.

I agreed to call him once I got on the bus, and when I did, the conversation was short. He didn’t seem to be so frantic after he knew I was on my way back to Portland, and away from Isaac.

A little old lady sat beside me, showing me pictures of her grandkids. She was on her way to Portland to visit, meeting her most recent grandchild for the first time. She was sweet, but I wasn’t in the mood to chitchat, especially when she asked me why I was headed to Portland.

“Just going back home,” I replied, but had a sinking feeling in my chest that I really had no idea where home was, or what was waiting for me in Portland.

Chapter Thirty-One

Isaac

I opened up the hotel room, stepping inside quietly in case Maddie was still asleep. The bed was a mess, but she was nowhere in sight. I set the coffee and the food down and pushed open the bathroom door frantically, and found it as empty as the bed.

“Maddie,” I called out, why I don’t know. It was obvious she wasn’t there.

My eyes scanned the room, stopping on the floral makeup bag that sat on the edge of the bed. I’d shoved it into my bag when Maddie forgot to pack it in hers and had no room.

I reached for my bag, frantically searching for her phone that I had hidden inside. Her wallet was still there, obviously unnoticed, but the phone, it was gone. Fuck!

My hands trembled as I ran from the room, rushing to the front desk. “Have you seen the woman I came here with?” I asked.

His eyes told me he’d seen her, even though he shook his head. “She’s not well. She has amnesia, and I was supposed to be taking her home to help jog her memory,” I explained frantically.

The man seemed to lighten on his stance of lying to me about where she may be. “She told me not to tell you,” he said.

“I don’t care what she told you; she could be in serious danger,” I roared.

“She got a cab,” he said softly.

“What company?” I demanded, ready to jump over the counter and shake the man for the information I need.

He handed me the card of the company he called. “How long ago did she leave?” I asked.

“Maybe thirty minutes,” he shrugged.

I was already dialing the number. A woman answered with a cheerful greeting. I explained to the woman that I needed to know where one of their riders had gone just thirty minutes ago. I gave her the address of where she was picked up, along with a description. I waited on hold while she checked the files and driver’s logs, and then returned with a sigh. “She was dropped at the bus station on Seventeenth.”

I hung up, quickly searching for the bus stations number. When a woman answered the number I dialed, she informed me the bus for Portland had left about ten minutes ago. Fuck!

She was headed back to Rob, the abusive asshole that made her leave Portland in the first place. She had to be so confused, so scared. What have I done? Why didn’t I just tell her the fuckin’ truth in the first place?

I dialed Elijah’s number as I walked back up to my room. “How’d it go?” he asked.

“I didn’t get a chance to tell her. She’s gone,” I sighed, opening the door to my room and walking inside. I sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the small bag that used to contain Rob’s phone. “She found her phone, and she’s on a bus headed to her ex now,” I sighed.

“What did she say?” he asked.

“I didn’t see her. She was gone when I got back to the room. I tracked her from the cab she took,” I explained, feeling defeated.

“Okay. Well, you’re clear to fly, right?” he questioned.

“Yes, the flight leaves this afternoon. I’ve got a couple hours,” I replied.

“Catch the flight, and I’ll meet ya there. At least you can protect her, even if you can’t convince her that you did this for her own good,” he said calmly.

My nerves were shot. I couldn’t imagine what I was going to say to her when I saw her, or how’d she react when she saw me. I knew I had to go though, at least to protect her from Rob. I’d tell her everything, admit what a selfish bastard I was for not telling her sooner, but to at least let her know that Rob is not the man she wants to be with, even if I’m not either.

I shoved everything back into my bag, checked out of the hotel, and took a cab back to the airport.

The line was horrific as I waited for my new ticket. The lady at the counter was rude, slow, and had no concern that I’d spent the night in a hotel due to a canceled flight. After five minutes, she finally handed me a ticket that was for several hours past the time I was told on my text update. “What’s this?” I asked.

Her eyes lifted from her computer, glared into mine, and she simply said “You’re ticket. The earlier flight is already booked.”

“No. I need to go now,” I pleaded to her unsympathetic expression.

“Take it or leave it, that’s all we got,” she hissed.

I knew arguing with her was going to get me nowhere, so I grabbed my bag and headed through the security area. I calculated the time in my head. The flight would leave in four hours with one layover of an hour and half. Total flying time was about an hour and a half, and Maddie’s apartment was close to an hour from the airport. That was nearly eight hours, and with the hour already gone with her on the bus, I’d be lucky to make it to her apartment before she did.

I called Elijah, explaining my delay. His flight was already booked, a straight thru, but he was going to make it there in about the same time as me. “It’s going to be fine. We’ll get there in time. He’s not going to do anything to her as soon as he sees her,” he assured me.

I wasn’t so sure. Rob knew about me, and he didn’t like me. Maddie had to delete my name from her contacts, remove any signs of friendship from her social media pages, and pretend she’d never spoken to me while we planned her getaway from the monster she’d promised to marry. He was insanely jealous, and I knew once he heard my name, and knew she’d been in Miami, she was in danger: immediate danger.

I found an empty stool in the little pub across from my gate and ordered a whiskey to calm my nerves. I scrolled through my phone, landing on Maddie’s Facebook page. Her smile warmed my heart, even just through pictures. I hated to think of her unhappy, and I knew no matter what happened tonight, no matter what she believed, she was going to be hurt. There was no doubt in my mind that she was already hurting, and that was all my fault. I tried calling her phone many times but she never answered.

“Can I get you another?” the woman behind the bar asked as she took my empty glass. I nodded, forced a half-smile, and waited as she poured me another glass.

Elijah sent me a text letting me know he was on his way, and I quickly finished my second drink, headed to the gate, and just waited.

Even though I was only a little over four hundred miles away from Portland, it felt like I was a million miles away from Maddie.

Chapter Thirty-Two

Maddie

I felt someone nudging my shoulder as I opened my eyes. My head was against the glass window of the bus. It was stopped, in a large parking lot, and the little old lady beside me was rustling me awake. “We’re here, dear,” she said, her voice sweet and shaky.

I heard my own grandmother’s voice suddenly. I was certain it was her. “Maddie, don’t ever think you can’t do anything you set your mind to do,” she said. Tears filled my eyes, and I choked back my painful memory. “Thank you,” I said politely to the old woman who was now out of her seat and in line to get off the bus.

My phone was flashing and I had many missed calls from Isaac but I didn’t want to talk to the liar.

I waited until everyone had moved from the back and stepped out behind the last passenger.

I wasn’t sure if I would recognize Rob or not, still not certain if he was the man in my bad dreams. “Maddie!” a familiar voice called out, causing me to turn and face the man who haunted my nights. It was him.

My feet froze in their spot as he rushed towards me. He wrapped his arms around me, squeezed me tight, and nuzzled his nose into my neck. It was cold, causing me to shiver. I pulled back from his embrace, still unsure if I trusted if he was who he said he was. After everything I’d been through, it was hard to trust. After the dream where he was hurting me, yelling at me, it was hard to trust. His eyes were wide and filled with what appeared to be relief, satisfaction, love maybe; I wasn’t sure. Even Isaac told me my memories could play tricks on me, the same thing the doctor had told me. Maybe that was why I started to remember Isaac, because of the pictures, his kindness, the need to remember. Did I even know him? Did I ever know him?

“Let’s get you home,” Rob said, picking up the suitcase that was placed beside me. I followed him, still staring at him intensely, trying desperately to remember. Did I love him?

He opened the trunk of a little black car and shoved my suitcase inside. He opened the passenger door, waited for me to get situated inside, and then shut the door. My chest tightened as I started to feel closed in, trapped. Rob opened the door, slid into the driver’s seat, and then stared at me with confusion in his eyes.

“You okay?” he asked.

I nodded, took a deep breath, and then exhaled to relax my heart rate. Rob seemed satisfied enough that I was calmed down, and started the car.

“How far is my apartment? Or do I have a house?” I asked.

“About ten minutes up the road,” he replied without taking his eyes off the road.

I was relieved that the trip would be short. For someone I was supposed to be engaged to, he felt like a complete stranger.

“So, you don’t know why I went to Miami?” I asked.

He didn’t respond right away. Instead, his lips tightened, and I noticed his right eye twitching. “You mean you don’t know?” he finally replied but didn’t answer.

I shook my head and slouched down into the leather seat. It was a nice car. He was dressed nice, and was very fit.

“How did your accident happen?” he asked.

“I was jogging, and a car hit me,” I answered nervously.

“Why did you end up with Isaac?” he probed.

“He was there when I woke up. The doctors and the police said he came to the hospital with me, that we were running together,” I explained, staring at Rob’s face for some reaction. Another twitch of the eye, and again the pursed lips.

Even though he didn’t act angry, I got the feeling he was upset with me, and that feeling felt very familiar. “Just a few minutes and you’ll be home, and this will be all over,” Rob said, his voice eerily chipper.

We finally pulled up in front of a large red brick building. It was the one I’d seen in my dreams, the one where I fought with the man who choked me, the man who I believed to be Rob.

“Did we have a fight?” I asked.

He didn’t answer. His lips curled into a crooked smile and he got out of the car. He walked around to my side, opened the door, and then helped me out onto the sidewalk. I stood there, staring at the building, remembering it, as he pulled out my suitcase.

I opened the doors to the apartments and started walking up the steps. It was as if my body was on auto-pilot, no need for me to think of where to go because it just knew the way. Three flights later, I stopped. I stood in front of a red door with the number twelve on it.

“This is my apartment?” I asked for reassurance.

Rob nodded and then pulled out a set of keys. He fumbled until he found the one he wanted, his hand shaking the entire time. “Guess that memory is coming back quickly,” he half-chuckled.

“The doctor’s told me coming home might help,” I said, walking into my apartment for the zillionth time, but for the first time.

The door shut behind me, and Rob walked past me with my suitcase in his hand. I watched him go down a long hallway, and duck into one of the rooms. The place was large, very clean, and decorated with soft pastels. Mail was piled up on a small table by the couch. I picked it up and stared at the name. “Who is Maddie Stewart?” I asked as Rob came back into the room.

He stopped, stared at me with a strange grin, and then laughed. “That’s you,” he said.

“I thought my name was Maddie Grubbs?” I questioned. That was the name that Isaac told me, the one that I’d used on the police reports, the hospital paperwork, and for everything else while I was in Miami.

“Grubbs was your grandmother’s last name,” he noted.

My head felt light and dizzy. I turned to make my way to the couch where I fell into the soft white cushions. “I wonder why he told me that,” I mumbled.

Rob snickered and let out a heavy sigh. “I’m sure he was telling you whatever he had to in order to get in your pants,” he hissed.

His tone frightened me. My body tensed as I sat up on the couch. I didn’t want to make eye contact. I didn’t want him to know that’s exactly what happened, that Isaac had gotten into my pants.

Rob moved across the room, his gait slow and mechanical. He stopped in front of me, standing tall and firm. “Did he tell you he bought you that ring?” he asked, his lip curling up as he spoke.

I watched his eye twitch and his expression turn as cold as his tone. “Yes,” I admitted, suddenly scared of the man in front of me. I was just as scared as I’d been in my dreams.

He let out another sigh, turned and walked away. I was relieved. I feared his next question would be if I slept with Isaac, and I wasn’t sure I could lie to him. I scanned my apartment, noticing a laptop on my table. I got up, moved towards it, and opened it up. The screen prompted a password, one which I couldn’t remember. “Do you know my password?” I asked Rob, who was now pacing nervously around the living room of my apartment.

“Scooter,” he said quickly.

I laughed. “Why Scooter?” I asked.

“It’s my dog’s name,” he answered quickly.

That didn’t sound like a password I’d make for myself. “Did you change my password?” I asked.

“Jesus, why are you acting so fucking weird?” he roared.

I tensed as I typed in the password. The screen opened, and I quickly browsed through all my social media accounts looking for Isaac. He wasn’t anywhere. I checked my e-mails: nothing. How did I know him? How did he know me so well?

“When did my grandmother die?” I asked Rob.

“I don’t know, sometime after you graduated college,” he snapped.

Isaac knew that.

“Did I ever talk about her?” I asked.

“What’s with all the grandmother questions? Sure, you talked about her, but I don’t remember what you said,” he snarled.

I moved from the laptop and walked down the hall. I stepped into the bedroom, my bedroom. There were two old dolls sitting on a chair near my bed. Tears filled my eyes. I remembered my grandmother gave those to me. Rob hated them; his voice was in my head telling me how creepy they were, and that I was a grown woman and I should throw them out. Isaac told me about my grandmother, that she collected dolls, birdfeeders, and he laughed about her being a hoarder.

Confusion flooded my mind as I tried to piece everything together. The pictures he’d shown me, I could remember Isaac from the neighborhood, playing ball in the street, sitting on my front porch drinking lemonade. I did know him, but how did I end up in Miami with him?

“Pack a bag and we’ll stay at my place,” Rob ordered. His tone was still filled with frustration and anger. The worried, concerned, and loving man that lured me from the hotel room I shared with Isaac was gone. This man, the one who now barked orders at me, was one I began to remember.

“Why? I want to stay here and try to remember,” I protested. That was the whole point to me coming home: to remember. I didn’t want to admit it, but I was afraid to go to Rob’s. I was afraid to go anywhere with Rob.

“He’s probably going to come looking for you here. It’s not safe. The man is a lunatic, and needs to be arrested,” Rob argued.

I wasn’t sure that was true. Isaac wasn’t a lunatic. He hadn’t done anything to hurt me, and he never spoke to me the way Rob had. There had to be a reason I was in Miami with him, but why hadn’t he told me the truth?

“He doesn’t know where I live,” I argued, not even sure if that was true. Maybe Isaac did know where I lived. He seemed to know plenty about me.

“Yeah, bullshit,” Rob snorted.

My eyes narrowed on Rob as he rushed into my bedroom. He came out a few moments later with a suitcase, the same one I’d traveled with. “Let’s go,” he demanded, pulling at my arm.

“No,” I refused, jerking my arm away from him.

“Do you want him to find you?” he asked, his eyes dark and cold. “Did you run away to be with him? Did you sleep with him?” he demanded.

It was the question I’d dreaded. Earlier it was more from embarrassment and fear of hurting someone who I’d promised to marry. Now it was fear. I didn’t want to answer Rob. “Did you?” he spat, his lip curling up and his eye beginning to twitch wildly.

My heart pounded against my chest. Fear consumed me, filled my veins, and I froze in my spot. I didn’t know what to do or where to go. The man in front of me, the one who claimed to love me was scaring me, but the other one, the one I thought I loved lied to me about so much. I was truly alone.

Chapter Thirty-Three

Isaac

My feet were finally on Portland soil, one step closer to finding Maddie. Elijah hadn’t contacted me yet, so I assumed he was still in the air, on his way. I knew he didn’t understand why I did what I did, because no one did. I didn’t. I only knew I loved Maddie, and even though she probably hated me, I had to save her.

I stood at the car rental place, shifting my weight from left to right while in line. It was moving slowly, too slowly, and I was growing impatient.

Finally, the large man in front of me was called to the counter, leaving me to be next. I stared at the woman with long black hair and a tiny waist with contentment as she asked one ridiculous question after another. I looked back to the large man who was being helped by the other clerk, shifting back and forth between them, wondering which would be first to leave and open up my spot as next.

Finally, the black-haired woman quit asking questions and took her keys. The woman at the counter waved me towards her with little enthusiasm and I handed her my credit card. She punched the keyboard in front of her computer with her long red nails until finally stopping to look up at me.

“Is a sedan okay?” she asked. I nodded. I couldn’t give a fuck what type of car she gave me. I just needed to get to Maddie before it was too late.

After what felt like an eternity, the woman finally entered everything she needed into the system and left the counter to retrieve keys. Her lips pursed together as she handed them to me, then her eyes narrowed as she told me the location of the car.

“Great, thank you,” I said quickly, taking the keys and rushing from the counter to the lot to find the car.

I walked the length of the parking lot twice, and then finally found the little black car that my credit card had paid for. I climbed inside, pulled Maddie’s wallet from my bag, and entered her address into the GPS system. Ten minutes and I’d be at her front door.

My phone rang as I pulled onto the highway. I slid my thumb across to answer and turned up the stereo for the Bluetooth to work its magic. “Hey, Beth,” I greeted.

“Isaac, where are you?” she asked with a panic in her voice.

“I’m in Portland,” I answered.

“Is everything okay? You never called me to let me know how things had gone,” she lectured.

I forgot in all the commotion to check in with her. She worried, I knew that, and under the circumstances, I couldn’t blame her. “I’m really sorry; things took a different turn than expected,” I explained.

“What does that mean?” she questioned.

“Well, we had a delay, Maddie found her phone, talked to Rob and took off,” I sighed, feeling the impact of the situation as I spoke.

“Oh, Isaac, is she okay? Are you with her now?” she probed.

“I’m on my way to her place now. I have no idea if she’s okay,” I admitted with a defeat in my tone.

“Isaac, you need to be careful; he could be dangerous,” she warned. There was no doubt in my mind that he was dangerous; that’s why I was going seventy in a fifty-five to get to her as fast as I could.

“Shouldn’t you call the cops, have some backup?” she asked.

I chuckled half-heartedly. “And tell them what?” I snorted. “Elijah is on his way,” I informed her.

Knowing Elijah was on his way seemed to satisfy her, but she still tried to convince me to wait for him to arrive. That wasn’t happening, not if I found her and knew she was in danger. I couldn’t call the cops; there was no way they’d understand. What would I tell them? “Yes, officer, I lied to this woman about her identity, kept her for weeks at my place in Florida, and made her fall in love with me…this man, the one that she knows, the one whose she is wearing his ring, he’s the bad guy.” Yeah, right. I was fucked. I had to do this on my own if Elijah didn’t make it in time. I knew that.

I promised Beth I’d be careful and hung up so I could follow the directions from the GPS. The woman’s voice told me to take a right, then a left, and then told me the destination was on my right. I slowed, watching for addresses and found a large brick apartment building with the numbers matching my GPS and parked behind a black car, similar to the one I was in. Her apartment was on the third floor, number twelve. I looked up, checking the windows, finding one that had a light on three floors up. I didn’t know if it was her apartment or not, and I couldn’t see anyone inside.

My phone rang again. I unplugged it from the Bluetooth and slid my thumb to answer it. “Hey, Elijah,” I greeted my friend.

“I’m here; where are you?” he asked, his voice winded.

“I’m in front of her apartment. I don’t know if she’s here yet or not, or if she’s with him,” I explained.

His voice was still winded as he grumbled in the phone. “I’m walking as fast as I can to find my car,” he explained.

I talked to him while he looked for the car. Once he found it, I gave him the address and told him it was only about ten minutes away, seven if he drove like I had. “I’ll be right there. Don’t do anything stupid,” he warned.

I assured him I wouldn’t and hung up.

Suddenly a shadow walked past the window on the third floor. I stretched my neck to the passenger side window to get a better look. Another shadow walked by, but I couldn’t make out the people. I knew there were two up there. If that was Maddie’s apartment, Rob was with her. Fuck, I am too late!

I wanted to go up, to bust through the door and slam Rob to the ground, wrap my arms around Maddie, and save the day. I knew there were a couple problems with that plan. One, I wasn’t sure that was her apartment. Two, Maddie may not be happy to see me. Rob may be filling her with lies, pretending to be the sweet fiancé that is only concerned with her safety. If she still believed his story, and he hadn’t shown his true colors yet, she would surely call the cops and have me arrested.

I picked up my phone and stared at her name on my contact page. My thumb lingered over her number. Something inside of me made me call. I had to hear her voice, to know she was okay, and to warn her about Rob.

The shadows moved past the window again as the phone rang, and then Maddie’s angelic voice sounded in my ear. “Hello.” It sounded a bit shaky, but it instantly calmed me to hear. She hadn’t answered my calls before so something must be wrong.

“Maddie, please don’t hang up; just listen,” I pleaded. “You’re in danger. You came to Miami to get away from Rob, from his abuse. I lied to you; I’m so sorry. I was only trying to protect you. I didn’t want the police or the hospital to know who you were in case he looked for you. I didn’t know your memory was gone, and when you woke up, and you didn’t even know me, and I didn’t know what to do,” I explained quickly.

I watched the shadow in the window. Someone came up from behind and then his voice sounded in my ear, irritated, angry, and filled with hate. “Is that him?”

Maddie mumbled, “Yes.”

“You need to get away from him,” I insisted.

“Hang the fuck up,” I heard Rob yell, and then the Maddie’s cries were muffled, far away, no longer in the phone. A loud slap sounded, the kind of slap flesh against flesh makes, and I knew he had hit her. My heart raced as the phone hung up and silence filled my car. The shadows were no longer in the window, and I could no longer see Maddie or Rob. I had to go to her, to help, even though I promised Elijah and Beth I wouldn’t go alone, that I wouldn’t do anything stupid.

The only stupid move I could imagine right now was doing nothing.

Chapter Thirty-Four

Maddie

The sound of Isaac’s voice, warning me and explaining why I left, shook my soul. I remembered. I was running from Rob, willing to go anywhere, give up everything, just to get away.

My cheek burnt from his slap, and tears filled my eyes as he jerked the phone away from my hand. It rang again, and I knew it was Isaac, worried after what he’d heard. Rob’s eyes were pitch-black as he pushed the button on the side of my phone to turn it off. “We’re leaving,” he demanded.

I didn’t want to leave. I didn’t want to go anywhere with him. My memories flooded back like a wild tidal wave through my mind. He hurt me, a lot. He was jealous, and that’s why I didn’t have much of any sign of Isaac in my life. I’d erased Isaac from my life for Rob but memorized his number.

I was stupid.

“You need to leave,” I demanded of Rob.

He chuckled, his lips curling into a crooked smile as he glared at me. “I’m not going anywhere without you,” he hissed. He inched towards me, his hands reaching out to grab me. I stepped back. I looked over his shoulder at my front door. I didn’t think I could make it past him and unlock the deadbolts, and he’d shoved my phone into his pocket. I had nowhere to go, no one to call, and no one to save me from this monster.

I took another step back and then turned to run down the hallway towards my bedroom. He was right behind me. I could hear the loud stomping of his feet, but I didn’t turn to look. I made it to my room, rushing inside and quickly grabbing the door to slam it shut. Rob’s hands pressed against the wood, stopping me from creating the barrier between us. He was strong, much stronger than me, and no matter how hard I pushed on the door, it wouldn’t close with him on the other side.

My throat burnt as a scream roared through it and out into the room. “Go ahead, scream. No one is going to help you now,” Rob snarled.

“Leave me alone,” I cried out as he pushed open the door, knocking me to my backside onto the floor.

“You’re just a dirty little whore. I gave you a ring, a promise of a better life, and what’d you do? Ran off to Miami with some scumbag that did nothing but lie to you. He doesn’t care about you. I’m the only one who cares. You have no one, Maddie, just me,” he hissed, reaching down and gripping my right arm tight in his hand. He jerked me upward to my feet. His hand squeezed the flesh of my arm so tightly, I cried out.

Rob jerked me violently from the bedroom and back into the hall. I pulled back with my feet, but his strength was too much to fight. I struggled as we entered the living room where my suitcase sat on the floor.

“We’re going to my place, and you’re gonna be punished for what you did,” Rob growled.

Rob pushed me down onto the couch while he gathered a few belongings to add to my suitcase. I was remembering his place as he spoke. It was just outside of town, once a small baked goods factory, now converted into a large gym with an apartment above. It was late, so the gym would be closed, and there were no houses nearby, only businesses that were already shut down for the night. I couldn’t go there. I wouldn’t go there. He could do whatever he wanted to me there, and no one would hear. At least there are neighbors here, and they would surely call the cops if I continued to scream for help, wouldn’t they?

“I’m not going anywhere with you,” I blurted.

Rob looked up, his eyes still black, but his smile filled with amusement. “You’ll do whatever I say,” he ordered.

I shook my hand. “No, I’ll scream, and someone will call the cops.”

He laughed. “No, they won’t. A neighbor called once, and you scolded them for interfering with your personal life, don’t you remember?”

Mrs. Carter, yes, I remembered. She called the cops, and I’d refused to press any charges for fear of what he might do after. She’d come to my door that next morning to me answering with a black eye and busted lip. “Oh dear, are you okay?” she asked.

Rob was there, standing behind me at the door, but out of sight of Mrs. Carter. He’d threatened to set a fire in the building in the middle of night, one so strong and furious that it would burn up my neighbors as well as myself if they ever called the cops on him again. I’d pleaded with him that I couldn’t control them, that it was his fault the cops had come. That’s when I got the black eye. I looked at Mrs. Carter with as much anger as I could muster.

“Do not interfere in my personal life ever again,” I scolded with a cold and sour tone.

Her eyes filled with confusion and pain. She was a lovely lady, one so sweet and kind that it crushed my soul to talk to her like that, but what choice did I have?

“Get up; let’s go,” Rob demanded, pulling my arm hard and jerking me to my feet.

His chest pressed into mine, his hot breath so close it washed over my skin like an evil, slithering snake. “I missed you,” he whispered, pushing his lips into mine. I struggled, but he held me tight, pulling me in close to him. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I cried out for help once again.

Rob’s hands moved to my ass. “I’ve missed this too,” he hissed, squeezing my ass cheeks in his hands.

I swallowed hard, realizing that there may not be a life away from Rob. This may be my fate. I wish I’d never left Isaac.

Thirty-Five

Isaac

I dialed Maddie’s number again, but after only two rings it sent me to voicemail. When I called back, it went directly to voicemail. Panic rushed through my veins at the thought of her being hurt. I was right outside, just steps away from her. I had to go in and help her.

My phone rang as I opened my car door. It was Elijah. “Hey,” I gasped as I answered.

“I’m almost there,” he said.

“I just called her. Rob’s in there with her, the third-floor front apartment. He hit her, took her phone. I’m going in,” I informed him as I headed for the front doors to her apartment building.

“I’m only a few minutes from you; don’t go in yet. Wait for me,” he pleaded.

I couldn’t wait. Maddie was hurt. I heard the slap that landed across her soft face. If I waited, even a couple minutes, there was no telling what could happen. “I can’t,” I hung up the phone and shoved it into my pocket.

My hand pulled at the door, and I rushed inside. Up three flights of stairs, I prayed she was okay with every step. I could hear her scream from inside the door, but it was locked. I slammed my shoulder into it as hard as I could, but it barely budged. My shoulder burnt from the impact, but I couldn’t quit. Another slam into the door and it gave a little more. It was obvious there was a deadbolt locked, and pushing through was going to be a hard task, if not impossible. Beth’s words floated in my mind: “Call the cops.” But I couldn’t, at least not yet.

“Maddie!” I called out, hoping she’d hear my voice through the door and know she was going to be saved. I needed her to feel some comfort. From the sounds of her screams, she was already terrified.

A door opened behind me, a little old man with thin black hair stepped out into the hall. “I have a key,” he said, his voice shaky.

My eyes widened as I nodded at the man to open the door. “Are you the man who’s been paying Maddie’s rent?” he asked. I nodded. It must’ve been the landlord. Thank God for small miracles.

“Mrs. Carter called me earlier when she heard commotion next door. She worries about Maddie; we all do,” the man said as he opened up the door.

I pushed it wide and found Maddie on the floor, Rob on top of her, and her skirt pulled up around her hips. Her bright eyes were glossy with tears, and her bottom lip trembled as she looked in my direction. I lunged towards Rob, tackling him from atop her and taking him to his back. Maddie pulled her knees to her chest, sobbed violently, and shook back and forth as my fist slammed into her ex’s face. His strength was something I hadn’t accounted for, and I wasn’t in the shape I’d been in when still in the military. He grabbed my neck, choking it hard as I struggled to pull from his grip. My throat swelled and started to burn from the force his hands delivered.

I lifted my arm again, forgetting about removing his grip and slammed into his face, once, twice, three times. He released. He let out a loud growl as he rolled me to my side, and then to my back. Soon I felt the impact of his fist slamming into my nose, and then my jaw.

My eyes drifted to Maddie. That look of fear in her eyes sent adrenaline through my body, and a new strength emerged with a vengeance. I bucked from the ground, grabbing Rob by the throat like he’d done to me, and threw him off of me. I quickly got to my feet as he stumbled to his. He lunged towards me with his head down like a bull charging a red flag. I stepped out of the way, pushing him past me and into the wall head first.

Red and blue lights flashed through Maddie’s apartment window as I tried to make my way over to her. She stood quickly, that look of fear still in her eyes, and ran towards the door. “Whoa,” a familiar voice sounded, and then Elijah entered the apartment with Maddie in his arms.

She wrapped around his neck, sobbing uncontrollably as he patted her back gently and gave me an approving nod.

The police arrived shortly after Elijah, stopping to talk to the landlord first. I sat down on the couch, staring at Maddie in Elijah’s arms, remembering the look of fear she’d had in her eyes, not only for Rob, but me as well. I knew once she talked to the cops, I’d probably be arrested, or at the very least, brought in for questioning.

Elijah peeled Maddie from his arms as the cops approached. One of the officers took her aside, out of the apartment where I couldn’t hear or see. Elijah walked over to me, sat on the couch next to me, and patted my leg. “You just couldn’t wait, could ya?” he chuckled.

“He was on top of her; I think he was trying to rape her,” I sighed, watching two officers escort Rob out in handcuffs. “I couldn’t wait.”

“I know. You did good,” Elijah said with a pat on my back.

An officer moved into the apartment, approaching myself and Elijah on the couch. “I understand you are the one who broke this up,” he questioned, his dark eyes looking directly at me.

“Yes,” I admitted.

“How did you know she was in distress? Did she call for help?” he probed.

“I called her. I heard him slap her as he screamed at her to hang up the phone,” I explained.

“Well, it’s a good thing she has friends like you,” the officer smiled and then handed me a pen and paper. “If you don’t mind, write down your statement,” he added and then walked away.

I wasn’t sure what to write down, at least not about why I was outside her apartment, or why she’d taken off from me and ran to him. “Just stick to what happened from the phone call til now,” Elijah said as if he’d read my mind.

I nodded, breathed in hard, and then exhaled slowly to calm myself down.

“What do you think she’s telling them?” I whispered to my friend without making eye contact.

“It doesn’t matter. I’ve got your back,” Elijah boasted.

Chapter Thirty-Six

Maddie

I was shaking as the officer asked me what happened. I was embarrassed, but I told him the truth, all the way from when I ran to Miami to get away from him and lost my memory. “I was coming home to jog my memory,” I sighed, leaning against the wall outside my apartment.

“So, you were traveling with Isaac?” he asked.

“Yes,” I admitted.

“How did you end up with the assailant?” the officer probed.

Tears fell from my eyes, and I began to shake. I wasn’t sure how to explain what happened without causing Isaac trouble. I didn’t want to see him in trouble, at least not after he saved me. I remembered we were friends, and I remembered his kindness, helping me get to Miami and away from Rob. “I started remembering, and I talked to Rob. He sounded so sincere, so desperate to see me, so I left Isaac and took a bus,” I explained.

The officer seemed satisfied with what I said, not questioning anything about mine and Isaac’s relationship. “Once he picked me up, his tone started to change, and I remembered how awful he’d been to me. Isaac was told by the doctors to let me remember on my own, so he didn’t tell me about Rob,” I added.

“Is he going to stay with you now?” the officer asked. I quickly shook my head. I didn’t want Isaac to stay, even though I hated the thought of being alone. He’d betrayed me, lied to me. I couldn’t trust him, not fully.

“I’m fine. I just want to be alone,” I insisted.

The officer explained that Rob was being taken to jail and would be held without bond until court in January. I was relieved that I didn’t have to worry about him coming back to harm me, and relieved that my memories were back, even if some were uncomfortable and made me sad.

“If you need anything, just call,” the officer handed me his card. His eyes were dark and intense, his face chiseled and masculine. He was a handsome man, a kind man, and something about him reminded me of Isaac.

“Thank you,” I said softly, walking back inside my apartment.

Isaac and Elijah were standing near my couch with an officer by their side. I didn’t want to speak to him, not yet, and maybe not ever. My heart ached at the mere sight of him. I loved him. But, it wasn’t real. He tricked me.

The officer patted Elijah and Isaac on the back and then moved towards me. “You okay here, ma’am?” he asked. I nodded and fought back my tears.

“Do you want us to stay?” Elijah asked as he approached me. The officers were already gone, and the apartment was already feeling lonely.

“No, thank you,” I mumbled.

Isaac kept his distance, a few feet behind Elijah. His eyes penetrated into my soul, making me want to reach out, wrap my arms around him, and fall into his arms. “Are you sure?” Elijah asked again.

“I’m sure. I need time alone, to process everything,” I explained.

I waited until Isaac exited the apartment before following Elijah to the door. I wondered if he knew what Isaac was doing this entire time, and if so, why he’d allowed it. I smiled and shut my door, locking each of the locks and then double-checked that they were locked.

I was alone in my apartment. I was totally alone in my life.

My eyes scanned the room, taking in every single item. Some I remembered, some I didn’t. It wasn’t home, at least not yet, not now.

Pictures of Rob and I were all over the place. I took each one from the tables, from the walls, and shoved them in a basket under my coffee table. I wished I hadn’t remembered him at all.

It was late, and my eyes were heavy. I walked into the bedroom, pulled open each of my drawers until I found some comfy clothes, and quickly changed into them. I climbed into bed with my laptop and my phone that the cops retrieved from Rob’s pocket. I hadn’t turned it back on yet, and I wasn’t sure I wanted to. If Isaac tried to call, I wasn’t ready to talk to him, and it didn’t appear I had anyone else in my life.

I browsed through my laptop, checking my social media accounts. I was a personal trainer, not a yoga instructor like Isaac told me. No wonder I didn’t find a connection with the exercises, but I did in the gym near his home.

All of my accounts seemed to be for business, except Facebook, which seemed to only have pictures and Rob and me together. I started deleting them one by one and then blocked his name from my accounts. I changed my password and looked through my friend list. My memory started to come alive as I looked through each of their pages. A knot formed in my gut as I realized there was no one I was close to. My page was filled with acquaintances, and a few friends from school and from college that I knew I’d lost track of.

I stared at my grandmother’s dolls sitting in the chair near my bed and let the tears fall from my eyes. I missed her badly. Having her memory back was like losing her all over again. “What happened to me?” I sobbed. “When did I become this person that allowed someone to control me?”

My eyes grew heavier and heavier as I slid into my bed. The comforter was heavy but soft and my mattress so fluffy that I sunk into it like a bed of feathers. All I wanted to do was sleep, to remember, and to forget.

There were no bad dreams, no nightmares of being hurt. There were only dreams. Dreams of Isaac. I couldn’t push him out of my mind, no matter how hard I tried. I could feel his touch, taste his kiss, and smell his cologne. I tossed and turned, my heart aching for him as my body squirmed beneath the heavy comforter. It would take time, but I’d forget him.

Chapter Thirty-Seven

Isaac

“You sure it’s a good idea to stay?” Elijah asked, his small travel bag in hand.

I’d spent the night at the hotel near Maddie’s apartment and I had no intention of leaving until I knew she was okay. “I’m sure,” I replied.

Elijah patted me on the shoulder before leaving the hotel room we’d shared the night before. I still wasn’t sure what Maddie told the police, or completely convinced I wouldn’t be arrested if I showed back up at her apartment. It was a chance I had to take.

Her phone was still turned off. I tried calling twice the night before and once already this morning. It went straight to voicemail.

With Elijah gone, the hotel room felt empty and lonely. I sat on the edge of the bed with my travel bag next to me. Maddie’s wallet was inside, the excuse I was going to use to see her, but there was also something else I’d bought for her, for her birthday. I wondered if she realized that I’d lied about that as well, if she knew, in fact, that today was her birthday.

I made so made mistakes, but I knew in my heart of hearts that I made them for the right reasons. I grabbed a clean outfit and moved into the bathroom. My arm was stiff and sore as I reached for the faucet in the shower. I undressed, climbed inside the small tub, and pulled the curtain closed as the water rushed over my aching body.

Images of Maddie on the floor with Rob atop her floated in my mind each time I closed my eyes. I didn’t want to think of what he was about to do to her, what he would’ve done if I hadn’t gotten inside.

I lathered up the hotel washcloth with the tiny bar of soap and ran it over my body. There were bruises on my right arm, my ribs on the left side were sore and tender, and my back felt like it had been stretched beyond its capabilities. I quickly rinsed, shut off the water and grabbed the small towel hanging on the rack near the shower. I wasn’t sure I was ready to have Maddie turn me away. My heart ached at the thought of her hating me as I dried off and dressed.

What am I going to say? I had no idea.

My phone rang, causing me to flinch as it blasted into the silence of the room. I rushed towards it, hoping to see Maddie’s name on the screen, but it was Beth. She was calling to tell me ‘I told ya so’ no doubt.

“Hey, Beth,” I answered, ready for her lecture.

“Isaac, Elijah called and told me everything. Are you okay?” her voice was filled with concern.

My defense softened as her voice carried through the phone to my ear. “Yes, I’m fine,” I replied.

“I just want you to know, I’m proud of you,” her words shocked me. Proud of me?

“I know how much you love her, and I’ve seen she loves you too. I can’t imagine what would’ve happened to her if you hadn’t stayed so close.”

My eyes were welling up with tears. I swallowed hard and cleared my throat to keep my emotions intact. “Thank you, Beth, but I really messed things up for us,” I choked out.

“Elijah told me you stayed behind; what are your plans?” she asked.

I didn’t have any. My pause was long, and I could hear Beth sigh on the other end of the phone as she waited for my response.

“You have to have a plan,” she said softly.

“I’m going to return her wallet,” I stated firmly without mentioning my plans to give her a birthday gift. “I can at least see if she hates me,” I added.

“She’s probably really confused, and yes, angry, but I doubt she hates you,” Beth advised. “Call me if you need anything,” she added, and then hung up once I agreed.

My stomach growled from hunger and fear. I have to do this before I lose my nerve. I grabbed the items I planned to give to Maddie and rushed out of the hotel room. The elevator was slow, as if trying to detain me from what I planned to do. The rental car still had Maddie’s address in the GPS, but I didn’t need it. I could find my way to her with my eyes closed. My heart would lead the way.

I parked in the same spot I’d been in the previous night. My little black rental car was right below her window. In the daylight, it was hard to tell if lights were on or not. There were no shadows in the window like before, and I feared the possibility that she’d left, found a friend to take her in, protect her, and not lie to her like I had.

The round man with thin black hair that had let me inside the night before walked out of the front doors. I climbed out of my car, quickly greeting him as I walked towards the apartments. “Thank you again for your help last night,” I extended my hand.

The man shook my hand, a smile smeared all over his face. “Maddie is a good girl; we are all just glad to see that monster out of her life,” he said.

So am I.

He strolled on down the sidewalk, to where, I had no idea. To me, the man was my savior, a saint, and the only reason Maddie didn’t end up raped, or worse at the hands of the man who proclaimed to love her.

I went inside the building and started up the three flights of stairs to Maddie’s apartment. No wonder she was in such great shape; it was a long, upward walk to her apartment door. I chuckled to myself at the thought of all the hamburgers I’d eaten over the last several weeks, and how Maddie warned me they would make me sluggish and weak.

I made it to her door. I stood there in front of it, my hands frozen to my sides, and my breathing starting to calm from the climb. What was I going to say to her? What if she took her wallet and closed the door in my face? Beth was right; I needed a plan. I didn’t have one.

My right arm lifted, and my knuckles beat on her door with the same rapid pace as my heart. I couldn’t hear anything on the other side of the door, just silence. I knocked again, this time a little harder.

After a couple seconds, I heard someone inside. The peephole slid over, scraping against the metal of the door as I assumed she was getting her first peek at who stood at her front door.

“I have your wallet,” I said, holding up the designer wallet for her to see.

Chains unlatched, deadbolts unlocked, and then the door opened. My heart raced as her angelic face appeared. She didn’t have an expression, no fear, no anger, no excitement to see me: nothing.

“I wanted to give this to you,” I mumbled, holding her wallet in front of me. Her hands were trembling as she took the accessory I’d lied about being lost. “Can we talk?” I choked.

Her eyes were dark and cold, but she widened the door and let me inside. The hairs on the back of my neck stood stiff from nerves rolling through my body. I handed her the wallet, which she immediately started going through. She pulled out her license, her credit cards, all with the name Maddie Stewart, not Maddie Grubbs. “I’m sorry. I was trying to protect you,” I mumbled.

Her eyes lifted to mine, so wide, so beautiful, even though darkened by sadness, confusion, and what I feared may be hate. “I changed your name, your birthdate, everything so the hospital or police wouldn’t be able to identify you to Rob,” I explained.

“You tricked me to get me into bed,” she snapped, her eyes starting to well with tears.

“Maddie, I never meant to trick you. I swear to you my only intention was to protect you. When you were in that hospital bed, all I could think about was losing you. I’ve loved you my entire life, and when you came to Miami, I thought it was my chance to prove to you that you deserved better, to show you how you should’ve been treated,” I pleaded.

Her eyes softened and started to brighten as she let one solitary tear fall from her left eye down her cheek. “You could’ve told me,” she hissed.

“I should’ve. I thought you might forget him, about how he’d treated you. You were so frightened, so scared when you arrived, you fell into my arms sobbing. I knew what that man had done, what he was capable of doing if he found you. When you finally opened your eyes, I’d been there the entire time, and my heart had never felt lighter than it did at that moment,” I reasoned.

“You were my friend,” she gasped.

“I am your friend. I didn’t trick you into falling in love with me; you did that on your own. I’ve always loved you,” I said, reaching into my pocket for the ring I’d bought her in Miami. “Here, I wanted you to have this on your birthday.” I extended the small velvet box to her.

She held it in her hand, tears falling down her face freely now. “Today’s my birthday,” she sobbed. I nodded, fighting back my own tears. How could I have hurt this woman? I love her with everything inside of me, everything I have.

Her eyes lit up as she opened the box. The beautiful tanzanite ring stared her in the face. “This is the ring I tried on,” she gasped.

“Yes. You loved it, and I wanted you to have a ring that was meant for you, so you could get rid of the one you were wearing,” I said, glancing towards her finger where Rob’s ring no longer occupied her finger.

“Thank you,” she said softly.

“Nothing between us was a lie. Even though I did lie to you about some things, you and I were never a lie,” I said, hoping it was enough to soften the hate she must’ve had for me in my heart.

I started to leave, but my feet wouldn’t move. Her eyes were locked onto mine, and something inside of them told me the hate, if ever there was any, was gone. She reached for my hand, her skin so soft and smooth it made my entire body tingle from just that single touch. “I don’t like that you tricked me. But, I do appreciate you taking such good care of me, and…” her voice trailed off as she swallowed audibly. “I know my love for you is real,” she exhaled.

My heart jumped in my chest, and without planning, thinking, or any self-control, I pulled her into me, kissing her with the same passion I’d had the first time our lips ever met.

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Maddie

All of the pain and anger I felt melted away in Isaac’s arms. I’d thought about him all night, about how close we were, about how he’d taken such good care of me, and how much I truly loved him. I knew he did things the wrong way, but I also knew he did them for the right reasons.

Our tongues entangled in a passionate embrace as his hands roamed up my body, sending arousing chills to my spine. He pulled away gently, letting his teeth slightly graze my bottom lip, tugging it delicately from my mouth. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t,” he stammered.

I giggled; watching him apologize for something I wanted as much as he did was amusing. “Don’t be sorry,” I replied, lifting to my tippy toes to reach his mouth with mine.

I knew I’d run to Miami for more than a safe haven to hide from Rob. I’d run to Isaac to profess my love for him. All those years I’d always dreamed of there being more, but the timing was never right. He was in the military, I was in college, he was with his first love, and I was with Rob. When I decided to leave, when Rob became violent, I knew there wasn’t anything for me in Portland anymore. The only one for me was Isaac, and that life would be in Miami.

His strong arms wrapped around me tightly and lifted me from the floor. He scooped me up, carrying me like a child as he made his way to my bedroom. My heart raced, and my body tingled as his soft lips pushed into mine. My arms loosely hung around his neck as my body melted into his.

One swift toss and I was on my mattress, my back bouncing as my eyes locked onto Isaac’s. He worked quickly removing his shorts and exposing the toned, tan flesh to my eyes. I watched as he kicked off his shoes, let out a squeal as he ripped his belt from the loops of his pants, and then gasped as he unleashed his hard cock. He didn’t fumble with the condom, but instead slid it on with such grace, such skill that my mouth watered.

His hands reached for me, gripping my hips and pulling me to the center of the bed as his eyes pierced into mine.

My body squirmed beneath him, loving every touch as he slowly pulled my tank top over my head. The loose sleep pants I wore didn’t put up a fight when he tugged at them, and the fact I hadn’t wore panties to bed left me instantly vulnerable to his disposition.

Isaac gripped my left leg, holding it upward from the bed as his mouth pushed against my ankle. His kisses were soft and quick, like tickling butterflies on my skin. I gasped as his mouth traveled down my leg, to my knee, to my thigh, and then stopped at my center. His hot breath pushed the fine hairs on my pussy, tickling me as they swayed with his breathing.

My back arched, my ass lifted from the mattress, and I pushed myself into him, forcing his mouth to touch the soft, wanting flesh of my cunt.

Soft flicks of his tongue teased my plump lips, spreading them apart gently as he glided between them and into my tight hole. My hips rocked slowly with a steady motion as he lapped up my arousal. I reached down, gripping his head, running my fingers through his short hair, and guiding his rhythm.

A single finger teased my entrance, wiggling back and forth until it worked itself inside my body. I moaned approvingly as he fucked me slowly, letting his mouth move to my clit. It was swollen and sensitive as he sucked it between his lips. Gentle tugs pulled it from my body, massaging it with an intensity that was bringing me closer and closer to climax.

My moans grew louder as his pace picked up, and my hips continued to rock but lost their sense of rhythm as my orgasm approached. My eyes closed, my head fell back, and I let the waves of pleasure rush through my body. The sweet tension pulsated through me, releasing a wild rush of excitement with each throb, until finally, my body let go.

“I’ve missed you,” Isaac whispered, wiping the glaze of my arousal from his mouth. He slid up my body, slowly and carefully as his cock traced along my thigh before settling between my legs.

My pussy was still throbbing, causing Isaac’s cock to twitch with anticipation. Our eyes locked together, as if speaking to each other’s hearts. I gasped as he slid into me, spreading my hips for his girth. His motion was slow, steady, and perfectly synchronized to my throbs.

I let my fingers trace the muscles in his arms, and then slowly roll to his backside. His ass was hard and muscular; tensing as he thrust slowly into me, and feeling his muscles flex as he filled me with his large muscle was working up my excitement again quickly.

My mouth lifted to his neck, sucking the delicate skin near his ear. He growled with pleasure, pushing harder into me. My tongue rolled down his neck, my lips closing on his chin, and then working their way to his mouth. I could taste my own sweet arousal on his tongue as it rolled around mine. My arms wrapped around him tighter, pulling him into me so I could feel the weight of his body against mine.

His arms flexed, their muscles bulging as he worked to hold himself from collapsing into me, crushing me into the mattress.

Our hips rocked into each other, our rhythm perfectly synched and picking up pace at the same rate. My moans turned into gasps as he plunged deep into me. My body was filled, but hungry for more.

“I love you,” I whispered in Isaac’s ear, immediately causing him to pick up his pace.

His cock plunged deep into my body, creating friction against my G-spot with each thrust. My pussy started to throb again, and this time my orgasm wasted no time on climax. I clenched around him, my muscles gripping him and releasing him with sporadic motions.

A low growl rolled from his lips. As I looked up at him, his eyes closed, his lips parted, and his body tensed with pleasure. I pulled him into me, letting his weight crush me into the mattress for a moment before he rolled to his side, pulling me with him.

I loved being in Isaac’s arms. It was safe. I was safe.

“I truly love you, Maddie,” he whispered in my ear.

I exhaled, letting the breath I held in go, and feeling the sweet release of all my tension. “I love you too.”

Chapter Thirty-Nine

Isaac

Maddie was beautiful lying there on her bed. Her perfect silhouette displayed beneath the thin sheet left me breathless. Her long hair flowed from the pillow, and she looked so relaxed, so peaceful. “Are you going to be okay here alone for a while?” I asked, knowing she would be just fine. Maddie Stewart was a strong woman, able to overcome anything in her life, and she’d proven that many times.

“Of course,” she purred, rolling over to face me.

I hated to leave, but my phone had rung off the hook all morning, and Beth had sent several texts about a client that needed my help. I was going to have to go back to Miami soon, but I hated to leave Maddie.

I leaned down, kissing Maddie on the forehead, and then headed out of her apartment. Once I was in my rental car and on my way back to the hotel, I called Beth. “What’s going on?” I asked.

Her voice was exhausted as she let out a sigh. “It’s Mr. Gallo. He’s demanding our attention right away, meaning your attention rather. He says his fiancée is planning something this weekend, and he’s insistent that she’s up to no good,” she explained. “When are you coming back?” Beth asked.

I stammered at her question. I hadn’t thought about going back so soon. I wanted to stay, to work things out with Maddie a bit further, and possibly plan our future, if there was to be one. “I take it you need me back there right now?” I asked.

“I’m so sorry. I know you want to stay and win Maddie back, but this is important. If we can’t do this for him, he’ll take his business elsewhere. He was adamant about that,” she apologized.

“Maddie and I are actually doing very well; that’s why I’d hate to leave,” I growled. “I’ll book a flight. Tell him I’ll be there this evening,” I spat.

I pulled up to the hotel and went inside and gathered my belongings. At the front desk, I turned in my keys and paid the bill. My hand clenched around my phone, not sure if I wanted to book the flight before talking to Maddie.

No, I have to talk to her first.

Maddie opened the door to her apartment and let me back inside. My heart ached as she wrapped her arms around me and showered me with a welcoming kiss. “What’s wrong?” she asked, obviously noting my tension.

“I have to go back to Miami,” I complained.

Her eyes narrowed as she looked at me. I couldn’t tell what emotion she was feeling. “When?” she asked.

“Now. I have to book the next available flight,” I informed her with disappointment in my voice.

Her eyes saddened, and her bottom lip pushed out. “I understand,” she said softly. I watched as she moved into the kitchen. “Are you hungry?” she asked. I was starving. “I ordered pizza from the place by my gym. I wanted to taste it one last time.”

“Last time?” I questioned.

“I decided I’m not staying in Portland. There’s nothing here for me,” she said so casually it killed my soul. Where was she going? “I want to start fresh,” she added.

The thought of Maddie starting out fresh meant that she was leaving me behind as well. She was leaving everything behind to start a new life. Fuck. I was losing her all over again, and this time, probably for good.

I noticed three large suitcases by the couch in the living room as I followed her from the kitchen. She set the pizza box on the table and pulled a large slice from the pie, handing it to me. “Try this; you’ll love it,” she insisted.

I took a bite, but it was hard to swallow. My throat was closing shut and my chest tightening. “It’s delicious,” I muttered as I swallowed hard to get the piece down my closing throat.

We sat and ate in silence, until I couldn’t take it any longer. “Maddie, I know you’ve been through a lot. But, I don’t know if moving away from everything you know, from everyone you know, is the best idea right now,” I pleaded.

“I don’t have anyone here in Portland. The friends I had from school I’ve drifted apart from thanks to Rob’s jealousy, and the ones from college are spread out all over the globe now, and I’m not close with any of them. There is nothing here for me,” she explained, smiling in my direction.

She looked happy about her decision. I sure the hell wasn’t. “I’m really not ready to lose you again. I love you, and I know if you gave us a chance, you’d see that we are perfect for each other. We were so happy in Miami, you were so happy,” I continued to plead my case for her not to start completely fresh.

She didn’t speak, just smiled sweetly in my direction. I knew she didn’t want to hurt me. But this hurt like hell.

“You need to get your flight booked before it’s too late,” she insisted.

I watched her chewing on her pizza, her eyes bright and filled with excitement. She was happy. I couldn’t deny that. Maybe I was being selfish by trying to keep her to myself. She deserved to live her life, even if it wasn’t with me.

“Yeah, you’re right,” I agreed, pulling my phone from my pocket.

My bag was already packed and loaded in my car. I knew when I came up here that I’d be leaving Maddie; I just didn’t imagine she’d be leaving as well, to only God knows where.

I scrolled through my phone until I found the airline’s number. I clicked the phone icon and waited as it rang. The message prompted me to push one for English, and then three to book a reservation. Finally, a woman answered, asking me how she could help.

“I need a ticket to Miami from Portland, today if possible,” I explained.

“There’s a flight leaving in two hours; can you make that?” she asked.

My eyes shifted to Maddie. Two hours didn’t give me much time to say goodbye, but I knew it was a long flight. If I left then, I’d arrive late that evening in Miami, giving me time to get briefed by Beth on what I needed to do for Mr. Gallo.

“Yes, that flight would be fine,” I said, the phone on speaker where Maddie could hear.

“How many tickets?” the woman asked.

“One,” I sighed.

“Two,” Maddie chimed in. “He needs two tickets.”

My heart jumped against my chest. Her eyes were wide and bright, and her smile smeared across her face so perfectly it took my breath away. “Two tickets,” I announced proudly.

The woman took my information and I quickly hung up. “Are you serious?” I asked Maddie, who was still smiling wide.

“Yes. A fresh start, with you,” she giggled. “You didn’t think I was just going to leave you, did you?” she laughed.

I did. That was exactly what I’d thought. I wrapped my arms around her, lifting her from the floor, and swung her around the room as my lips pressed into hers. I couldn’t wait for our fresh start.

Epilogue

Two Years Later - Maddie

It was my third Christmas in Miami, and I still couldn’t get used to the sunshine beaming in through the windows as I decorated with garland and white lights. The smell of the turkey roasting in the oven marinated the house as I moved to the white Christmas tree that Isaac selected and carefully placed the multi-colored candy canes on each branch.

My life had never been better, and I had Isaac to thank for that. I’d been taking cooking lessons for over a year and a half now and was ready to start my career as a private chef. Isaac still chuckled when he watch me in the kitchen. “Who knew getting hit by a car could make you a good cook?” he’d tease.

A lot of things in my life had changed since I was hit by that car. I had friends, a life of my own, and one I shared with an amazing man. Rob had gotten out of jail around Christmas the previous year, but as far as I knew, he never tried to contact me or Isaac.

I moved into the kitchen, almost floating on air as the aroma pulled me into the room. The turkey was perfectly roasted as I pulled it from the oven, trading places on the rack with a homemade apple pie.

The waves slapped at the shore behind me, soothing my soul as I stirred the gravy, and then added a few finishing touches to our holiday meal.

The doorbell rang as I finished icing the last cookie, causing me to rush to answer it. “Merry Christmas!” Beth exclaimed, wrapping her arms around me tightly. We’d become very close friends since I’d returned to Miami, so close that I considered her my best friend, aside from Isaac, of course.

“Merry Christmas, Maddie,” Elijah smiled, handing me a bottle of wine. Beth made a face, wrinkling her nose at his gift. “Man, I miss wine,” she complained. Her hands rested on her round belly, patting it gently as she smiled.

“Two more months, and then we’re celebrating,” I smiled, giving her baby bump a soft rub.

Her new husband, Marty, entered behind her, winded from running up the street. Parking was tight since everyone on the street seemed to be celebrating at home. He was tall, good-looking, and best of all, nice. He came with a son, baggage as Isaac had teased, but to Beth, who thought she couldn’t have kids after her abusive past, he was a dream come true.

I hated that I wasn’t right about Beth and Elijah. But, Marty made Beth happier than I’d ever seen her, and they made the perfect couple.

Marty’s son bounced into the room, rushing straight for the Christmas tree. He checked each box until he found his name. “Mine,” he grinned from ear to ear.

Beth had confided in me that she didn’t think she could have kids of her own, and being a part of Marty’s life, and his son’s, made her feel whole again. We couldn’t believe it when she announced her pregnancy, and even her doctors called it a miracle.

“It smells amazing in here,” Elijah noted, taking a big whiff as he gave me a side hug.

“Everything’s almost ready. We’re just waiting on Isaac,” I announced.

Almost as soon as I made the announcement, Isaac entered through the front door. His cheeks were flushed red from the cooler winds blasting through the tropical city, and his eyes filled with a strange excitement. “Merry Christmas,” I said, tippy-toed to reach his lips. His arms stretched out to wrap around me, and something fell from his pocket.

I leaned down, picking up the small black box from the floor. I gasped as I realized what it must hold inside. Isaac nervously took it from my hand, his eyes wide and filled with fear. “You weren’t supposed to see that yet,” he smirked.

“Then we’ll pretend I didn’t,” I said sweetly.

Beth’s eyes were all over me. She’d seen the box, and she knew what was inside; her expression gave that away instantly. “Let me help you in the kitchen,” she offered, pulling my arm as she drug me into the kitchen.

She let out a squeal of excitement once we were alone. “Was that a ring?” she asked.

I nodded, my cheeks starting to burn. I imagined that Isaac probably had something romantic planned, and me seeing it may have ruined his surprise. “Do you think he’ll ask you tonight?” she questioned, her excitement stirring my own to a level I almost couldn’t control.

“I hope so,” I screeched.

“It’s been two years, so it’s about damn time,” Beth insisted.

Isaac, Marty, and Elijah entered the kitchen, cutting our conversation short. They helped carry the dishes to the large dining room table where we’d all eat our Christmas meal with a perfect view of the sunny beach.

“So, Beth was telling me about your latest case,” Elijah questioned Isaac from across the table.

He finished carving the turkey and looked towards his friend. “Yes, its pro-bono case, but I think for a good cause,” he replied.

I loved that his heart was so pure, so giving. He’d told me about the case earlier that week. It was a young girl, pregnant, and already with two small children. Her husband was abusive, and she wanted away. He threatened her with lawsuits to take away her children, and with his money, she feared he could. Isaac knew she couldn’t get her hands on any money since her husband controlled everything, so he agreed to follow them for the next month, gathering all the proof she needed to fight him in court.

“We should start a Christmas program that supports abused women and children,” I chimed into the conversation.

Beth was immediately for it, being a survivor of abuse herself. “The police have a program in place already. We could use our contacts there to get something started,” Isaac mentioned.

I was about to burst with excitement. The discussion of the program, of Isaac’s case, was all a great distraction, but I still knew what was in his pocket, and I wanted it now.

“I think we should do presents before pie,” I announced as everyone finished their plates.

Beth grinned, knowing what I was pushing for. There was no better setting than this one for Isaac to propose. We were with our dearest friends, and they’d gone through so much with us, they deserved to be a part of this as well.

Isaac’s eyes glared into mine, his lips curling into a crooked smile. It was obvious he knew what I was up to.

Marty’s son was first, immediately running to get his box. “An X-box?” he exclaimed, jumping up and down with the present in his hand.

“That’s a little extravagant, isn’t it?” Beth sighed.

I giggled. “I can spoil my nephew if I want,” I sassed.

I didn’t have any brothers or sisters, so I knew nephews and nieces wouldn’t be a part of my life. Once we became so close with Beth and Marty as a couple, I decided right then and there that they were family, making me an aunt. A very proud aunt.

I handed Marty and Beth each their present, Beth getting two since she was carrying my little niece in her belly. Marty got a certificate to golf all year at the best club in town. Elijah got a gun he’d been wanting, a vintage one that he and Isaac talked about frequently, and Beth opened the baby’s first: a handmade quilt that my grandmother had made, carried down for generations. Her gift was a soft, fuzzy robe, slippers, and a soothing sounds machine for her labor. “Thank you,” they both said in unison while Marty’s son worked on hooking up the X-box he’d received.

Beth gave me a photo album, filled with pictures of our two years together. “New memories are the best memories,” she smirked. I agreed.

Marty handed me a large thin box. I opened the lid to find a gourmet set of knives, each carved with the initials ‘ML.’ He must’ve known I was about to lose my maiden name and take Lewis as my new one. I smirked and nodded in appreciation.

Elijah gave us an expensive bottle of Scotch that he planned to share with Isaac later, and me a small box that contained business cards for my new business, flyers he’d printed out, and a link to a website he’d created with a full five years of tech support and design assistance.

“That is so sweet; thank you,” I wrapped my arms around them both. I couldn’t be happier, or could I?

I looked at Isaac, his eyes nervously shifting back and forth. “Can we do ours now?” I asked, winking in his direction.

His cheeks turned pink, a shade I wasn’t used to seeing on him. “Okay. I guess there is no better place or time than here and now to give you your present,” he said, standing from the table.

He walked towards me and took to one knee. He pulled the black box from his pocket, holding it in front of him and towards me. “Maddie, I’ve loved you since the first day I saw you when you moved into the house next door. I spent my entire life dreaming of you, wishing you’d love me back, and I never believed in a million years I’d ever get so lucky. Today, I feel like the happiest man on earth, but I know if you’d be my wife, I could be even happier,” he choked out as he opened the ring box.

It was a gorgeous vintage ring, a diamond so big it caught every light in the room and displayed a beautiful shimmer of color. “I would be honored,” I gasped, wrapping my arms around his neck. My lips pushed into his, and Beth, Marty, and Elijah clapped and cheered.

“I have something for you too,” I said with teary joy in my voice.

“I can’t imagine anything better than your yes,” Isaac smiled.

I pulled a box from under my chair and handed it to Isaac. He looked at me curiously as he opened the top lid. A small stick was inside: a pregnancy test with two blue lines.

“We’re pregnant?” Isaac screeched. I nodded with tears flowing down my cheeks from my overwhelming happiness.

He wrapped his arms around me, then pulled me from my chair and into his chest as he covered me with kisses. “I didn’t think it was possible, but you just made me even happier,” he roared with excitement.

I never dreamed anything would make me this happy in life. But here I am, with the man of my dreams, a beautiful baby growing in my belly, and two of the best friends a girl could ask for.

That’s the end of . Click here to continue.

HERE’S SOME BONUS BOOKS

MR SHERIFF

By Ivy Jordan

This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places and incidents are products of the writer's imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locales or organizations is entirely coincidental.

Copyright © 2017 Ivy Jordan

 Chapter One

What started off as a beautiful Sunday ended as a nightmare.

“I made you!” A slurry of saliva spewed from Greg’s mouth and into my face.

He was mad, madder than I’d ever seen. “You need to leave,” I said calmly to deaf ears.

“You would be nothing without me, Naomi, nothing!” Greg screamed in my face.

His face was contorting as he shouted, and his once-beautiful blue eyes turned dark. I’d never been afraid of him before, not once in the first year we dated. The last few months things had escalated quickly, and after I’d told him we were done, the new Greg emerged. The Greg I didn’t know, the one that scared the hell outta me.

“Greg, you need to leave, now!” My voice raised to match his.

“You can’t tell me what to do,” he chuckled, leaning against the desk in my front room. “This place, yeah, I got you this place. All those clients you’re cooking for, training, I got those for you, too. You don’t think I can’t take everything away from you whenever I want?” he snarled, his mouth twisted in a half-smile.

Some of that may have been true, a year ago. I worked hard to get where I was, and I did owe some of my success to Greg, but certainly not all. “You only got me this place so your friends could keep an eye on me,” I sassed, wishing I hadn’t as soon as my words filled the room.

My body jolted backward as Greg’s strong arms pushed into my chest. The doorjamb ground into my back, sinking into my flesh like a knife. I let out a scream of agony as Greg’s dark, angry eyes pierced into mine with a smile sliding upward on his face. This was not the Greg I once knew.

His hands gripped around my waist, slinging me across the room. My back hit the arm of the couch, sending me from my feet and onto the cushions.

“You need to remember who’s in charge,” Greg whispered as he leaned over me.

I pushed myself up, angry and ready to take back control of my life.

Greg was walking out my front door, his stride filled with pride. My anger grew quickly, causing me to lunge after him, pushing him out onto my front stoop. “Don’t ever come back here!” I screamed.

“I have no reason to,” he said calmly, suddenly acting civilized instead of like the monster he’d been inside.

He reached his hand to his neck, where my nails must’ve dug into his flesh as I pushed. A smile smeared across his face as he pulled back a drop of blood with his fingers. “You’re a fuckin’ pyscho,” he growled.

His eyes grew dark once again, and he came at me, pushing me onto my ass. He hovered over me, screaming obscenities, calling me a whore and accusing me of attacking him.

My blood boiled as his slobber slung onto my cheeks. “You’re actin’ like you have ‘roid rage,” I hissed, standing from my pushed position, only to have Greg grip me to shove me back down.

My hand reached for something to catch my fall, only for it to be Greg’s face, and then shoulder. Another set of claw marks were now in place to prove his rantings.

His muscles flexed, his nostrils flared, and I watched carefully as his fists clenched. I knew he was ready to hit me. I knew he would’ve if two cop cars hadn’t pulled up right that second.

“Step away from her,” ordered a strong voice. The voice belonged to an officer with short dark hair and deep, dreamy eyes.

Greg lifted his hands in the air, smirked, and took a couple steps away from where he stood over me. “I’m so glad you’re here, officers,” he said calmly, turning around.

Marlene, my neighbor, stood in her front yard with her hand on her hip. It was obvious she was the one who called the police there in the first place, and just couldn’t wait to jump in the middle of it.

She’d been rude ever since I broke it off with Greg, not that she had been much friendlier before. She was living with Hank, one of Greg’s best buddies at the gym where he worked—and where I used to work.

Another officer, one a little larger in the belly than the first one, got out of his car and walked over to Marlene.

I sat there on my front stoop, the place where I’d been pushed, and just waited for my turn to speak. Greg was six-foot-two and at least two hundred twenty pounds made up of mostly muscle; there was no way he had them believing I attacked him… was there?

Finally, the handsome officer walked toward me. “On your feet,” he ordered.

I obliged, standing quickly as the officer reached behind his back. He pulled out a pair of handcuffs.

“Turn around and place your hands behind your back,” he ordered.

Tears welled in my eyes. This wasn’t happening. There’s no way this could be happening.

“Officer, why am I being arrested?” I asked.

“You ae under arrest for domestic violence,” he stated in a calm voice, as I felt the hard, metal cuffs being slapped onto my wrists.

The sound of them clicking, locking me into this man’s custody, made me cringe. “This is absurd. He attacked me,” I pleaded.

“We have his statement, and the neighbor’s. You are welcome to make a statement at the station,” he said, walking me toward his patrol car.

His hand pushed onto the top of my head as he instructed me to turn and slowly bend to sit in the cold backseat. “I’m sorry, ma’am. He had visible marks and a witness. I’m only doing my job,” he said softly before closing the door, locking me in the car that smelled of sweat and something bitter, possibly blood.

Greg’s face was filled with pride and sarcasm as he glared at me once the officer finished with his statement. I wished I could flip him off, scream at him, or better yet, hit him in his smug mouth, but I was cuffed and locked down. How could he do this?

The officer returned to his car, sliding into the driver’s seat without saying a word. He scribbled in his notepad, called the station on his radio to let them know he was bringing one in, and then put it in gear. “Am I going to jail?” I asked.

“You can call someone to bail you out once you’ve been booked,” he said, like it was no big deal. It was a huge fuckin’ deal. Booked? I was being booked?

Tears streamed down my cheeks, burning my flesh with each streak. “This isn’t fair,” I sobbed.

“You can’t put your hands on someone,” the officer stated sternly.

“He came into my house and attacked me. He threw me into the doorjamb, across the room, and slammed me down onto my ass on the front porch. He was ready to hit me when you pulled up,” I explained in a calm, even voice.

“He had a witness that saw you attack him,” he said, turning the patrol car down the main highway.

“Yeah, his best friend’s girlfriend. Besides, she didn’t see anything in the house. And I only scratched him trying to catch myself from falling,” I said, my tears drying up and anger starting to grow.

I pushed back into the seat, arching my back to relieve the pressure the cuffs were creating on my shoulders, and heaved a sigh. This was obviously useless.

I stared at the cars flying by, wondering if anyone I knew saw me in the backseat of this cruiser. This was going to ruin my reputation, my career, and probably my life.

The officer’s eyes drifted into the rearview mirror several times. I couldn’t tell if he was checking to make sure I wasn’t trying to make my escape from his speeding car on the busy highway, or if he was showing some type of empathy towards me. All I knew was that his dark eyes were beautiful.

He was back on his radio, stating numbers that meant nothing to me, and then the gates opened in the back of the police station. He pulled his patrol car through, stopping at a large black door marked ‘Prisoner.’ What the fuck? Was that for me?

Tears flooded my eyes as the backdoor opened. The officer leaned in, gripping my arm gently to lift me to my feet. Once I had my balance, and my eyes cleared from the tears, I noticed his name tag: C. Reynolds.

“You have to believe me. I didn’t do anything wrong. He attacked me,” I pleaded once more, hoping to find a glimmer of interest in his eyes.

He moved forward, walking me to the door without speaking. A loud buzzer sounded and the doors opened. Officer Reynolds led me through them and into a cold, unfriendly room with white floors that smelled of bleach.

“Have a seat,” he ordered, moving towards a wood desk.

The handcuffs were chafing against my wrists, and all I wanted was to wake up from this nightmare.

Officer Reynolds sat down at the desk and proceeded to turn on his computer. His fingers pecked away at the keys like a pro while I sat there, awaiting my fate.

“Okay. Before I actually book you, do you have any marks that can support your claims?” he asked, his eyes offering very little kindness.

It was obvious he still didn’t believe me. “I don’t know. My back hit pretty hard into the doorjamb. I’ll probably have a bruise on my ass in a couple days, but that doesn’t do me much good now,” I noted.

He sighed, scooting out from his desk. I watched as he stood, towering over me as he moved to the back of my chair. “Lean up for me, please,” he said softly.

I leaned up and soon the warmth of Officer Reynolds hands was on my back. “Is it okay if I lift your shirt?” he asked.

“Yes,” I agreed, leaning up further so he could check for my marks.

The cool air of the room brushed against my back as my tank top lifted away from my skin. Soon, it was back down again, and my handcuffs were being removed. I stretched my fingers, pulled my arms in front of me, and let out a long sigh. “Are there any marks?” I asked.

Officer Reynolds moved back to his seat. His eyes were warm and filled with empathy. “Yes. You have marks to substantiate your story,” he said. “Has this ever happened before?” he asked with concern.

“No. He’s always been controlling, and he’s grabbed me a little too hard before, but nothing like this,” I explained.

“I’m not going to arrest you, Naomi. But, I do need you to fill out a statement,” he said.

“Of course,” I agreed, relief filling my soul.

“Where do you plan to go?” he asked.

“Home.”

“That was your place of residence?”

“Yes.”

“And he does not live there anymore?” he asked.

“He never lived there,” I explained.

“I’d feel better about sending you home with a restraining order against him. Are you willing to agree to a temporary one being put into place?” he asked in a gentle voice.

“Yes,” I agreed. I would’ve agreed to anything to get out of that station.

“Here. Write down everything that happened in your own words,” he said, pushing a paper and pen towards me.

He was young, not much older than me, maybe in his late twenties. Even so, there was something so powerful about him, so strong. I finished my statement and then called Carrie, my best friend, to pick me up. I waited for her while Officer Reynolds gave me the instructions on how the restraining order worked.

“I don’t think he’ll be a problem again,” I said strongly.

“Believing that is your biggest mistake,” he warned.

A female voice came over the intercom on Office Reynolds’ desk alerting us that my ride had arrived. He smiled, scooted his chair back, and stood.

His eyes were different now, now that he didn’t think I was a criminal, a man-beater. They were soft, kind, and filled with compassion as he placed his hand on my lower back and led me through the double set of doors down a long hallway.

I looked down each hall as we passed, wondering if each one led to a cell where I could’ve very well been tucked away.

“I hope things get better,” he said kindly as he pushed open the last set of doors that led to the station lobby.

“Thank you, Officer Reynolds,” I said with a smile I couldn’t hide.

“Carter,” he said.

I must’ve looked confused, but I was merely shocked. “My name’s Carter,” he said with a smile.

Carrie stood at the front counter, her long, whiskey-colored hair flowing down her back, her big green eyes wide and filled with fear as she turned to me. “Naomi, are you okay?” she asked.

“Yes, just please get me outta here,” I sighed.

“Holy shit! I wouldn’t mind being cuffed and stuffed by him,” Carrie whispered as we walked out the front doors.

I giggled, knowing she was referring to the hot cop that had detained me, Carter. Carter Reynolds.

Chapter Two

I pulled up in front of my house, ignoring the fact that Marlene was working in her yard. She hadn’t spoken to me since that night over a week ago, and honestly, I was grateful. I knew if she had come over, for anything at all, I’d have ended up back in jail for smacking her smug face, this time for real.

The box I pulled out of my backseat was almost too large to get my arms around, but I managed. I’d just catered my first large party, a birthday party for a regular client. He wanted to not only show off his personal chef—me—but he wanted his friends to start eating healthier.

I’d handed my new business cards out to the guests, hoping to gain more business, and from the reaction of most, I figured I’d get at least a few calls. I didn’t need Greg, or his gym. I was doing just fine on my own.

I slapped my hip against the back door, slamming it shut as a cop car turned the corner.

My heart raced as I narrowed my eyes, hoping to see Carter inside. He’d been making rounds, pretty regularly since that night. Even though it had been over a week without another incident, he was diligently doing his duty to keep me safe.

I lifted my arm and waved once I noticed it was indeed Carter. The police cruiser pulled up beside my car, and he rolled down his window.

“You don’t have to spend so much time checking on me,” I said, secretly excited that I got to see him almost every night after work.

“It’s my job. And I feel bad that I almost tossed you in jail,” he smiled.

“You should!” I teased.

“What’s all that?” he asked, motioning to the large box in my hands.

“I had a large party to cater tonight. It’s just my equipment,” I explained, hoisting it higher on my hip so it wouldn’t slip from my fingers.

“Here, let me,” he said, opening his car door and shutting off the engine.

He took the large box, his dark, dreamy eyes lingering on mine, and then followed me to my front door.

I fumbled with my key, nervous that he was so close behind me. My body was tingling with excitement, something that seemed to happen every time he was near.

“So, has he bothered you anymore?” Carter asked as I opened the front door.

I held open the storm door, letting him inside. “You can set that anywhere. No. He’s called a few times, but he hasn’t been back over,” I replied.

“He’s not supposed to have any contact with you whatsoever. Has he threatened you in any way?” he asked, his voice growing stern.

“No. He called to yell about the restraining order, and a couple other times to ask about something work-related,” I sighed.

“If you have the phone calls still logged on your phone, I can pick him up,” Carter suggested.

“No. He’s stopped. I think he’ll leave me alone from here on out,” I assured him.

“I hope so. But better safe than sorry,” he said, setting the box on the kitchen table.

His eyes were always so flirty when they looked into mine, and his actions clearly showed some level of interest. I wasn’t sure if it was simply job-related, if he was just that kind, or if he had a romantic interest in me.

“I blocked his number,” I added with a smile.

His lips curled into a wide smile. “That’s smart. So, you work for a catering company?” he asked, obviously looking for a reason to delay his departure.

“No. I’m a personal chef and trainer. I create healthy meals, teach clients how to prepare simple meals for themselves, and offer workout routines that are customized to their lifestyle,” I said proudly.

“Wow. That’s impressive,” he said, looking around my house as he continued to linger.

“Why don’t you let me cook you dinner?” I asked.

“I couldn’t ask you to go to that kind of trouble,” he said.

“You didn’t ask. I offered,” I insisted.

He stared at me, his eyes smiling, and his demeanor somewhat nervous for a moment. “I could take you out to dinner, or even order take-out,” he offered.

“Nonsense. This is my passion. I’d love to feed you,” I said.

“Well, since you put it that way, how could I resist?” he smiled. “My next night off isn’t until Saturday,” he added quickly.

I gripped my phone, browsed through my calendar, and agreed that it was a date. Was it? A date?

“I better let you get relaxed and settled in. From the looks of that box, you had a long night,” he said with a chuckle.

It had been a long night, and I had been dreaming of putting my feet up and relaxing before he’d even pulled up. But now, I felt like I could stand there in my living room talking to him, staring at him, forever.

“Yes. You have to get back to keeping the streets safe,” I smiled.

“Not much goes on around here, but yes, I do need to get back on patrol,” he agreed, walking towards my front door.

I followed him out, feeling a strange awkwardness as he turned to say goodbye. My instincts were to wrap my arms around him, tiptoe and kiss those magnificent lips. He extended his hand instead, so I shook it softly. I knew my cheeks were blushing bright red, but there wasn’t a damn thing I could do to stop them.

“See you Saturday around seven?” he asked as his hand released from mine.

“Yes. Seven is perfect,” I agreed.

“Oh,” he turned once again before making it to his car.

He reached into his pocket, pulling out a small white card. “This has my personal number on the back,” he said. “Call me if you need anything. Anything at all,” he said, flashing a grin.

My cheeks hurt from spreading into such a wide smile, and burnt from the blushing. Had I just made a date with Officer Reynolds?

I shut my door, leaning against it to catch my breath and calm my pounding heart.

My phone blasted my ringtone from inside my tote. I pushed through the folders until I found it, quickly sliding my thumb across the screen to answer it.

“How was your night? Was it a good gig?” Carrie’s voice sounded from the other end of my phone.

How was my night? My night was absolutely amazing!

“You won’t believe what just happened,” I blurted out, ignoring her interest in my first big catering night.

“What?” she asked.

“Officer Hottie just left here,” I squealed.

“Oh, no! Was Greg back there again?” she asked.

“No,” I replied.

“Why was he there?” she asked with a curious tone.

I could barely contain my excitement. I felt as though I’d burst as I tightened my grip on the phone. “He was just checking on me. But, he helped carry my stuff inside,” I gushed.

“Oh my God, Naomi. What did you do?” Carrie said with a chuckle.

I laughed at her insinuation. “Not that!”

“Well, why on earth are you so giddy?” she questioned.

“We made a date for Saturday night. I’m going to make him dinner,” I said proudly.

“Oh wow. I’m so jealous. Maybe I should get arrested to find a good guy,” she giggled.

A good guy. That’s what Carter was: a good guy. I could see it in his eyes, hear it in his voice, and feel it in his actions.

“I’m nervous,” I admitted.

“Why?” she asked.

“It’s just weird. Isn’t it? Is it weird?” I stammered.

Carrie giggled on the other end of my phone. “You need to relax. He is gorgeous, he dedicates his life to protecting others, and he’s been there every day since Greg attacked you, so he obviously likes you,” she assured me.

That was all true. But, I was still nervous as hell.

Chapter Three

I tossed the grocery bags on my kitchen counter and rushed into the shower. Carter was supposed to be there in an hour, and even though he’d seen me plenty of times right after work, tonight was special.

I’d thought about calling his number, even just sending a text, but I couldn’t find a good reason. I found myself hoping all week that Greg would show up again, just so I’d have a good excuse to talk to Carter. Those few precious moments that I’d see him patrol my neighborhood were all I’d had. I was ready to have some alone time with the handsome cop that had almost arrested me. Yes, I am ready for that!

My long blonde hair was too thick to dry, so I pulled it back into a ponytail and dabbed foundation on my face. Mascara brought out my eyes, and even though everyone told me how blue eyeshadow made my eyes pop, I decided to keep my look more casual. Pink lipstick perfectly applied to my lips, and I was digging through my closet for something casual, yet sexy, to wear.

I settled on a white sundress to show off my California tan and a pair of flat sandals, and rushed into the kitchen.

Thirty minutes and Carter would be there, and I had nothing started. It’s okay, Naomi, you’re great under pressure.

My special dinner was planned to hopefully not scare Carter off of healthy cooking. For all I knew, he ate greasy burgers every night.

The water finally started to boil, so I tossed in the whole grain pasta with just a pinch of salt. I peeled and deveined the shrimp, and then started on my famous sea salt kale chips.

The doorbell rang, causing me to jump and slice a small piece of my finger. Shit!

I wrapped a paper towel around the cut and moved towards my front door.

Carter stood on my front porch, even hotter out of uniform than in. He held a bouquet of fresh lilies in his hand and wore a smile that could melt an igloo.

“Are you hurt?” he asked, looking towards the blood-soaked paper towel.

“It’s just a nick,” I said quickly, opening the door wide enough for him to enter.

“Let me see,” he said, gripping my hand in his.

A tingle shot through my body as our hands touched, and my heart swelled at the kindness in his eyes as he unwrapped my finger.

“Let’s get this cleaned,” he said, moving me towards the kitchen.

I didn’t argue. I did as he said, loving the gentleness of his touch and the concern in his voice.

He ran cold water over my wound, and then rewrapped it in a clean towel. “Do you have Band-Aids?” he asked.

“In the bathroom,” I said, starting to head that way.

“No. You sit here. Just hold this, add pressure, but not too much,” he ordered.

“There, above the sink,” I explained.

As he walked away, my heart raced at the thought of what he might see in my bathroom. I lived alone, barely had visitors—with the exception of Carrie—so tampons, birth control pills, and vaginal yeast cream had never been a concern until now.

I was relieved he reappeared into the kitchen so quickly, hoping he hadn’t noticed any of my personal hygiene items on his search for Band-Aids.

He sat me down at the table, scooting his chair in front of mine. He carefully unwrapped my towel, smeared antibiotic ointment that he’d found in my messy bathroom medicine chest onto my finger, and then tightly wrapped the Band-Aid around it.

“There. All better,” he chuckled.

“Thank you,” I said softly, feeling a tingle between my legs as he stared into my eyes.

“Oh, no!” I exclaimed, jumping up from my seat and rushing to the oven. I opened the door to perfectly crisp kale chips, and the aroma of the salty treats filling the kitchen quickly.

“That smells amazing,” he said.

“Wait until you try them. You’ll never eat potato chips again,” I boasted.

“Is there anything I can do?” he asked, looking around my kitchen.

“You can put those in water,” I said sweetly as I motioned to the flowers on the table, and then reached under the sink for a vase.

He smiled and grabbed the vase, filling it with cold water. He found a pair of kitchen shears, snipped the ends, and arranged them in the vase before sitting it in the center of the table. “Beautiful,” I sighed, staring at them with appreciation. Greg never brought me flowers.

“Can I help you with dinner?” he asked.

I hesitated, not because I couldn’t use the help, but because I wasn’t sure if he knew his way around a kitchen or not. He was young, a cop, and well, a man. Most men I knew ate TV dinners and fast food for a reason.

“If you’re scared I can’t cook, I can assure you I can,” he said proudly.

“Okay, then. Chop up those veggies while I heat the oil,” I replied.

He didn’t skip a beat, grabbing a knife and perfectly dicing the onions and peppers I’d had on the counter. He chopped the asparagus into small pieces and then sliced the mushrooms. He didn’t need any direction.

“Impressed?” he asked with a chuckle. I stared at him with what I was certain a surprised expression, even though I tried to hide it.

“Yes.”

“Good,” he said.

I strained the pasta, added it to the heated pan with shrimp, and then tossed in the veggies just long enough to heat them, but keep them nice and crisp.

“Wine?” he asked, handing me a glass already poured.

“Yes, please,” I agreed, accepting his offer.

He poured himself a glass while I made our plates, and I caught him sneaking another kale chip before we sat down. “You like them?” I asked.

He grinned. “Yes. Should I ask what they are?” he teased.

“Kale,” I said, laughing at his expression of disgust.

“Well, if you’d told me beforehand, I don’t think I would’ve tried them’” he admitted.

He complimented me over and over for my cooking, and I continued to remind him that he had helped. I wasn’t sure what to talk about. I barely knew him, and the only thing we had in common was Greg.

“So, are you staying safe?” he asked, breaking the ice, but of course leading the conversation around Greg.

“Yes. I’ve not had any problems,” I replied.

“He was never like that before?” he asked, surprised.

“He was always jealous and controlling, but never what I’d call ‘abusive,’” I answered, clearing the table of our dinner plates.

“You need to steer clear of those kinds; they always escalate,” he warned.

I couldn’t really picture Greg as an abuser, or dangerous. That day had been a bad day. It was not like him.

“He couldn’t handle me leaving the gym,” I explained. “When I decided to go on my own, I think it scared him. And, he didn’t like the idea of me working so closely with clients, in their homes, ya know?” I added.

“You’re a grown woman. You should be able to do what you want. That’s where trust comes in, I guess,” he sighed, finishing his wine. “I’m pretty sure I’ve seen you at the gym before. I know I’ve seen Greg,” he said calmly.

“I’ve never seen you there,” I said.

“You may’ve just not noticed me,” he replied.

“No. I think I would’ve noticed you,” I smiled.

He stood from the table, his tight t-shirt clinging to his hard chest and his jeans hanging just perfectly around his hips. Yes, I would’ve noticed Carter.

“I just think you’re too pretty, too smart for a guy like that,” he said.

My cheeks blushed with heat, my eyes widened, and a smile smeared across my face that I couldn’t control. “Thank you,” I whispered.

I wasn’t ready for the night to end, not yet. “Would you like to watch a movie?” I asked.

It was obvious he was ready to make his move, but I wasn’t ready, not yet. “Yes. I’d love to,” he agreed.

He filled our glasses with more wine and followed me into the living room. I turned on the TV. We decided on Tombstone, a movie we both professed to love. We settled into the couch, side-by-side, and Carter put his arm around me. It was nice.

Since we’d both seen the movie, we spent most of the time talking. I found out he was never married, and only had one serious relationship before. I told him how Greg was my first real boyfriend too, moving me from my hometown in Seattle to Los Angeles. He was twenty-seven, only four years older, and about what I assumed. Born and raised in Los Angeles, Carter still visited his mother every Sunday morning for breakfast, but didn’t mention his dad.

We found ourselves in each other’s arms, snuggled together on the couch as we talked. Being with Carter was easy, like we’d known each other forever.

“Can I kiss you?” he asked softly.

Our eyes were locked together, and I lost myself in the dark brown entrances to his soul. I couldn’t speak, but nodded as he moved toward me.

Our lips met, sending sparks of electricity through my entire body, and swelling my breasts against the thin white sundress.

His tongue slowly slid across my lips, as if tasting them as they parted. My body pushed into him, embracing him tightly with my arms, entangling our tongues together, and savoring the sweet flavor of his passion.

Carter was gentle, but passionate, leaning me back onto the couch cushion and pressing his weight onto me. His hands slid along my sides, caressing my hips and tracing my curves as his excitement grew obvious against my thigh.

The heat of the moment was making me dizzy with ecstasy, and as Carter’s hand slid up my leg, dangerously close to my inner thigh, I let out a sigh.

I wanted him to touch me, to feel my slippery excitement beneath my silk panties, but I knew it was too soon.

My body battled with my mind as I ground into him, enjoying the sensation of his hard cock pressed against me, and yearning for it to be inside my aching pussy.

No, Naomi, it’s too soon, that annoying voice in my head nagged.

His mouth moved from my lips, leaving them parted with soft sighs escaping as his lips sucked onto my sensitive neck. My hips rocked, my back arched, and his hardness pressed into my leg so hard it hurt.

Oh God, this was happening, and I didn’t know if I could stop it, or if I wanted to stop it.

His mouth lowered, kissing gently at the flesh just above my breast until reaching the small mounds on my chest covered only by the thin sundress. My nipples were erect, pushing out from the material and making it easy for his mouth to consume them.

A moan rolled from my throat and into the room, startling me to hear my own passion echo against the walls.

His lips tightened around my nipple, his teeth slowly and gently gripping it, tugging just enough to make me squeal.

My entire body tingled, an ache grew between my legs as my pussy swelled against the damp panties I’d chosen for that special date with Carter. Were they about to be wadded on the floor? Was I really letting this happen?

Carter’s hand slid between us as he lifted his weight from my body. It inched its way slowly up my leg, caressing my skin and teasing me as it neared the source of heat between my legs.

I didn’t stop him; I didn’t want to. My legs parted, inviting him to continue his journey. His fingers slid across the silk of my panties, causing my pussy to twitch with excitement, and then slid the material over, letting the cool air of the room tease my bare skin.

One finger slid between my plump lips, and then slid inside my warm hole. Oh God, I wanted this!

Slowly, Carter’s finger fucked me with a steady rhythm, nearly bringing me to climax before my mind took back over.

“I can’t,” I said softly, sliding up into a sitting position and pulling away from his skillful finger. “I’m sorry,” I whispered, feeling horrible for letting things go this far.

Carter looked disappointed, and then his eyes filled with fear. “No. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have pushed you; it’s just that I…just, oh, fuck,” he gasped, pushing his head into his hands.

“No. I wanted this. Trust me, if we knew each other a little better, this would’ve been the perfect ending to a perfect night,” I assured him.

He looked at me with his dark, soulful eyes. “You sure?” he asked.

“Yes.”

“I understand. I’m usually not this forward. Just that kiss, damn—it got me,” he said, shaking his head and letting out a deep sigh.

I knew exactly what he meant. It got me, too.

“I think we better call it a night,” he said sweetly, standing and extending his hand to me.

I placed my hand in his, feeling the calluses of his hard work, and let him pull me to my feet for one last kiss. I hated to leave his warm embrace, and the kiss, when ended, left me weak in the knees, and wetter between the legs than I’d ever been from such simple foreplay.

“I’ll call you,” he said softly, leaving me with one last peck on the lips.

Chapter Four

“Where are you?” Carrie asked.

I held the phone to my ear with my shoulder as I unloaded my bag of items onto the conveyor belt at the health food store. “Guess,” I laughed.

“Are you making Carter another healthy dinner?” she asked cheerfully.

“No, just picking up stuff for myself,” I groaned.

“I thought your date had gone great,” she questioned.

“Maybe not as great as I thought.” I tried laughing off my disappointment.

Carter had called that night, letting me know he made it home safe, and thanking me for the dinner, movie, and what he teasingly called dessert.

Our contact had been very little since then, mainly just a few short texts, and a few moments while he was on patrol.

“I’m sorry, girl. Maybe he just wanted to get laid; he is a man, after all,” Carrie laughed.

“Yes. A hotter-than-hell man. Ugh, I should’ve just done it,” I growled.

Carrie’s laughter lightened my mood and made the cashier give me an odd look as she eavesdropped on our conversation.

I paid for my food, told Carrie I’d call her later, and started across the parking lot to my car.

“Hey,” Greg’s familiar voice caused me to turn around.

He was walking towards me, his arms puffed up like balloons, and his neck nearly lost in his shoulders. “Greg, you’re not supposed to be near me,” I reminded him.

“Fuck your little pig’s paper,” he laughed.

“What do you want?” I asked, pushing my groceries into my backseat.

“I saw your little piggy’s truck in the driveway last weekend,” he scoffed.

I should’ve known one of his little spies would’ve been watching.

“You stalking me now?” I asked, giving him a warning look.

“I don’t need to stalk you. I figured you’d give it up to get yourself outta trouble,” he snarled. “Gotta keep em’ close enough to get away with assault,” he chuckled.

I couldn’t imagine what I’d seen in him. He wasn’t what I’d consider good looking, at least not now. He was in great shape, but his muscles were becoming more of a disfigurement than a flattering asset, and his eyes were filled with anger and hate. “Greg, you need to leave before I call the cops,” I warned.  “You were the one who assaulted me, and my bruises proved that,” I added, turning to walk towards my driver’s door.

It was the first time—well, second time—that I’d been afraid of Greg. With my back turned on him, there was a nagging feeling that he’d lunge for me, or grab me by my ponytail before I got into my car, but he didn’t. I watched him walk away toward his truck as I sat in the driver’s seat, staring into the rearview mirror. He was just jealous, not dangerous. Whatever that was at the house when Carter had saved the day, it was over, never to happen again.

I was still shaken as I continued to convince myself that Greg wasn’t a threat when my phone rang, startling me. It was Carter, just a little late to interrupt my encounter with Greg.

I slid my thumb across the screen to answer, excited that he was calling. Maybe he wanted to make plans, I thought. Man, what I wouldn’t do to be in his strong arms where my world felt safe.

“Hello,” I answered, my voice still a little shaken.

“Hey there, everything okay?” he asked.

“Yes. You’re just a few minutes late,” I chuckled nervously.

“Late? For what?” he asked.

“I just saw Greg as I left the store,” I explained.

“Did he approach you?” he questioned.

“Yeah. He was pretty nasty, too, but I reminded him of the restraining order, and he left,” I stated, leaving out the part where he scoffed at the paper.

“I can call it in, have him picked up,” Carter said, his voice strong with authority.

“That’s not necessary. Why add fuel to the fire?” I replied calmly.

“Are you sure?” he pushed.

“I am.”

“I’m sorry I haven’t been in touch much this week. My schedule’s been a bear, and I haven’t known my hours from day to day,” he apologized.

I was relieved that he had a good excuse. The fear that my rejection had scared him off, or that he was only interested in getting into my pants, had been making me sick.

“It’s been hectic here, too,” I said, calming down from my encounter with Greg.

“Well, they finally gave me a night off,” he said.

I could almost hear his smile through the phone. “Oh, yeah?” I flirted.

“Oh, yeah. And I would love to spend it with you. I know it’s short notice; if you’re busy, I understand,” he said quickly.

His words warmed my heart, and my crotch, making me squirm in my seat.

“No. I’d love to see you,” I agreed.

“Great. I was afraid you were mad at me for coming on so strong,” he admitted.

I laughed. “Not at all,” I replied, omitting the part where I feared my rejection upset him.

“Why don’t I bring you dinner? I really don’t want you at home alone tonight,” he suggested.

I paused, hesitating to answer.

“Is something wrong?” he asked.

Dating a cop wasn’t going to be easy. It seemed his senses were keen, and hiding my anxiety wasn’t going to happen. I sighed.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” I admitted.

“Did you want to go out?” he asked.

I was sore from work, and going out didn’t seem appealing. I wanted to stay in, to snuggle on the couch and finish where we’d left off, but knowing Greg had spies watching my every move left me uneasy.

“No. I would love to stay in. It’s just, well, Greg mentioned your truck, so either he or his buddies that live next to me are watching my house,” I groaned.

“Naomi, you really need to let me do my job. He’s crossing the line here, watching you, or having you watched,” he insisted.

“I really don’t want to stir him up. I think it’d be easier if ignored,” I pleaded.

“I’ll respect your wishes, but just know that if he approaches you again, I’m doing things my way,” he warned.

A chill of excitement rolled down my spine as he spoke with such conviction. “Yes, sir,” I teased.

“Would you like to come here?” he asked.

“Oh, I get to see Officer Reynolds’ bachelor pad; are you sure you want me to see that?” I teased playfully.

“I’ll cover the mirrored walls with sheets, and take down the strobe lights,” he laughed.

“I thought you were only twenty-seven?” I laughed.

“I’m an old school playa’,” he said in an oddly sexy voice.

“What time should I arrive?” I asked.

“Come now. I don’t want you running into Meathead at home,” he insisted.

I sighed. “I have groceries in the backseat,” I complained.

“So? I have a fridge. Since I’m a bachelor, there’s plenty of room once I throw out the empty pizza boxes and drink the last beer,” he teased.

“I look a mess,” I continued to find excuses.

“Messier than the day we met?” he laughed.

“I guess not that messy,” I smiled.

“I’ll shoot you the text, and see you in about ten minutes,” he said.

“Okay,” I agreed.

“Naomi?” he added softly.

“Yes?”

“I’m really glad you aren’t mad at me,” he said.

“I don’t think I could ever be mad at you,” I said, and then hung up the phone.

A few seconds later, his directions came through in a text. I recognized the street. It was near the beach, and in a pretty decent neighborhood. It wasn’t upscale, right on the sand, but a little ritzier than where I lived. My nerves were rattled as I pulled out of the parking lot and headed his way. I hadn’t had time to primp, or pluck. What if tonight was the night?

Chapter Five

I pulled into Carter’s drive, parking next to his truck. His house was one of the smallest on the block, but still had a great view of the beach. I got out of my car, and before I could open the backdoor, Carter was outside, ready to help. “Let me get those,” he said, leaning in to give me a quick kiss on the cheek.

He reached into the backseat, grabbed my two small bags of groceries, and walked with me to his front door.

Inside, the entry was decorated with pictures of small kids, a boy and a girl. “That’s my niece and nephew, the loves of my life,” he told me as we entered.

The furniture was new, modern, and situated so you could view the large stone fireplace. No TV.

A granite countertop wrapped around the kitchen, open to the dining area, and a large window offered a slight view of the ocean. “This is amazing,” I gasped.

“I had a hell of a time taking up the shag carpet and tearing down the Playboy bunny wallpaper before you got here,” he teased.

“Wow, you’re really sixty, aren’t you?” I laughed.

The kitchen was a dream. An island in the center offered an induction cooktop, a sink, and large wooden carving station. The outside wall was mostly windows, all providing different views of the beautiful beach across the street. “If I could just tear down that one house,” Carter said, glaring out the window at a large three-story that blocked the better part of his view.

“I guess you could build up,” I suggested.

“I thought about it. Maybe when I have kids,” he said without hesitating.

I was a little shocked to hear him mention kids. That was something most men I’d met in their twenties refused to think about. “You want kids?” I asked carefully.

“Of course; don’t you?” he asked.

I smiled. “Yes.”

“Shew,” he swiped his hand across his forehead dramatically. “Glad that topic’s handled,” he laughed.

“Not really. How many?” I asked, deciding to push the topic a bit further.

“Four,” he said, again without hesitation.

“Wow. I would love four,” I said.

“But only if there is a set of twins,” we both said at the same time.

“Damn, I knew you were perfect,” he growled, wrapping his hands around my waist and pulling me in close.

His lips teased mine, so close I could almost taste them, but not close enough to touch.

Our eyes locked, and for a moment, it felt as though our minds, hearts, and souls were in sync.

“I’ve missed you,” he whispered.

“You’ve seen me almost every day,” I giggled as my cheeks blushed pink.

“Yeah, for a nano-second. I missed holding you,” he corrected himself.

“I have to admit, I was afraid that you’d lost interest when I backed out of our make-out session,” I said softly.

His lips pressed into mine, gently working his tongue into my mouth, and kissing me with as much passion as our first. He slowly pulled back, leaving my weak in the knees and a little dizzy. “It’ll just be that much better that we waited,” he whispered.

My body melted into his arms as my head snuggled into his chest. A long sigh escaped my lips as his hand caressed my back.

“Are you hungry?” he asked.

“No,” I lied.

“Do you want a drink?” he asked.

“Not really,” I replied, looking up at him with my ‘kiss me’ eyes.

“What would you like to do?” he asked playfully.

“I’d like to quit waiting,” I flirted.

“Hot damn, that’s exactly what I wanted to do,” he said with a large grin on his face.

“Let’s get a drink and go upstairs to the hot tub,” he suggested, grabbing a bottle of wine and two glasses from the counter.

“I didn’t bring a swimsuit,” I whined.

“I was hoping you hadn’t,” he winked, and motioned for me to follow him up the spiral staircase.

The entire upper level was his master suite. The carpet was so plush, my sandals sunk into it, letting my toes get tickled by the silky fibers. A large bed was situated in the center of the room, near a big window that took up the entire wall. He grinned over his shoulder as I stood there with my mouth hanging open. “This is amazing,” I said, when I really wanted to say, “How can you afford this on a cop’s salary?”

“Ladies first,” he said, pushing open a set of large French doors that led to a beautiful deck.

I stepped out, feeling the ocean breeze cool against my skin. Carter set the glasses and bottle of wine down on a small table near the hot tub, and proceeded to uncork the alcohol and then pour us each a full glass.

He leaned over, turned on the jets to the tub, and then swished his hand around to check the temperature. “Perfect,” he said.

I blushed. “What if someone sees?” I asked.

He laughed. “Then I guess they’ll call the cops and I’ll have to arrest you for real, this time.”

I looked around, realizing the deck was offset in a way that was pretty private. “No one will see,” he promised.

“You will,” I sighed, suddenly worried about undressing in front of him.

“I’ll turn away. You get undressed and get under the bubbles. I won’t see a thing,” he said convincingly as he covered his eyes, peeking through his fingers with a wide grin before turning around.

I looked around once more, ensuring it was private enough to quickly undress and not be noticed by any neighbors. Carter was true to his word, keeping his back turned while I slipped out of my yoga pants, panties, and tank top. The water was hot as I took my first step into the tub, causing me to delay my quick retreat to the water like I’d planned. “Are you in?” he asked.

I walked in, sunk into the hot water, and told him it was safe to turn around.

“Damn, you’re gorgeous,” he sighed. “Turn around,” he ordered playfully.

I did as he said, and then moments later felt him enter the water next to me.

He leaned forward, grabbing our drinks, handing me one as he snuggled in next to me.

“This really is beautiful,” I said softly, gazing out at the ocean.

“You’re truly beautiful,” he whispered in my ear, and then his lips pressed against my shoulder.

The sensation between my legs was growing into a wild ache as his lips wandered around my smooth skin. I set my drink down, lifted his chin with my hand, and brought his mouth to mine for a passionate kiss.

Water swirled around my body, tickling me in places I didn’t know could be tickled. Our tongues entangled as our bodies pushed together, feeling the bareness of our skin touch for the first time. It was sensual, erotic, and being outside, somewhat naughty.

Carter’s hands brushed back my hair, and then lowered to my shoulders. His eyes stared into mine with an intensity that made me want him with everything I had in me. “Let me pleasure you while you enjoy your wine,” he whispered, reaching behind me to grab my glass.

I took the glass as he handed it to me, not sure of what he had planned, but excited to find out.

His smile was wickedly delicious, and his eyes seductively intoxicating. I nodded, knowing I was blushing, but ready for what was to come.

He slowly lowered his hands into the water, letting them settle at my hips. He caressed me, squeezing me gently with the motion of the water, and then worked his way to my breasts. “Sip,” he insisted.

I did as I was told.

His hands cupped my breasts, massaging them as his thumbs teased my tight nipples with small flicks. “Close your eyes,” he insisted.

It was awkward at first. But, once they were closed, my body relaxed and it became difficult to determine what were the jets, his mouth, or his hands.

My nipples sucked into his lips, his teeth gently tugging at them to pull them from the warmth of the water. The cool air was wildly sensual, and then the anticipation of the warmth of his mouth covering them was erotically delightful.

My legs parted, letting the jets blast against my hungry pussy. Carter’s hands caressed my legs, working my flesh away from my inner thighs, pulling my swollen pussy lips apart.

His mouth was on my neck, sucking, licking, and kissing, and then on my lips. I was lost in the moment, drunk with desire as moans rolled from my lips, and sighs poured from my throat.

My body rolled towards him, my legs opening wide enough for his hand to slide between them to the spot that now ached for attention. His fingers slid between my labia, spreading me open wide as another teased my clit with circular motions.

“I want to watch you come,” he whispered, sliding a single finger into my slippery cunt.

He worked it in and out slowly, my hips rocking in the same motion, begging for more. His hard cock pressed against my leg, my hand immediately sinking into the water to grasp it.

Soft strokes up and down his thick shaft brought a growl from his throat, and brought me closer to orgasm just knowing he was pleased.

Another finger slid inside of me, fucking me with the same steady rhythm. His mouth wrapped around my left breast, sucking it into the warmth of his cheeks, letting his tongue tease my nipple as he continued to fuck me with his long, thick fingers.

I was close, real close, and Carter quickly pulled his fingers from inside of me, and his mouth from my breast. “Don’t open your eyes,” he ordered.

I obliged, even though I was dying to know why he stopped.

His hands gripped my hips, moving me in the same motion he had been fucking me with his hand, slowly, steady, and upwards towards the surface of the water.

“Lean back, and let your body float to me,” he whispered.

My arms gripped the side of the tub and my back pressed against it. I let him continue his rocking until I felt the cold ocean air between my legs. He parted my legs, and then my labia, again opening me wide, but this time I knew he was able to see my most intimate parts.

Warm breath pushed onto my cunt, warming it, tickling it, and causing it to throb. His fingers slid just between my pussy lips, teasing my entrance with only slight penetration, even when I pushed towards his hand.

“I could come just watching you, looking at you,” he said softly.

His finger slid inside of my cunt, slowly, but deep. He didn’t move it, didn’t fuck me, and ordered me to hold still. The warmth of his mouth covered my clit, and his lips sucked it in, tugging it away from my body as my cunt began to throb around his finger.

Moans rolled from my lips as they trembled wildly, and my heart raced with excitement as my orgasm unleashed, unseen by me, into the openness of the outdoors.

Carter lowered me into the water slowly, pulling his finger from inside of me once the throbbing subsided. It was by far the best orgasm I’d ever experienced, and I couldn’t wait for more.

“How was that?” he asked, gripping his wine glass and chugging it down.

I could barely speak. I just nodded and mumbled something that sounded like gibberish as he smiled.

He stood from the water, setting his glass down on the table, and extended his hand to me. My eyes lingered on his hard cock, standing at attention just inches from my mouth. I wanted to taste him, to please him the way he’d pleased me, but it was obvious he had other plans.

“Come with me,” he whispered.

I stood from the water, taking his hand and seeing his eyes as they gazed upon my nude body for the first time. I knew he’d seen me, all of me, but there was something so sensual about the way his eyes danced along my curves while still maintaining contact with mine.

He wrapped me in a large towel, drying me gently before grabbing one for himself.

I let him guide me to the bed, where he slowly pushed me to my back.

His hands gripped my legs, just at my thighs, and pulled my ass to the edge of the mattress where his cock was waiting.

For a slight second, I wondered if he’d measured the height of the bed for this very purpose when in the salesroom. The thought made me giggle, to which he grinned. “I love when you smile,” he said.

If only he knew what I was smiling about.

He reached behind him, fumbling inside a case on his dresser until finding what he searched for inside. A foil package, bright blue and shiny, was in his hand, and then between his teeth as he ripped it open.

I watched as he pulled the condom from the package and slowly rolled it down his hard cock.

His thumb pressed into my clit like it was a button. Circular motions made me squirm and moan as he situated himself at my entrance. My cum was still slippery between my lips as the head of his cock slid up and down my slit to lubricate before plunging into me.

I was ready, so ready. His hands gripped my legs, pulling me onto him, sinking his manhood into my body with a smooth, tight thrust. My body swallowed him, pulsating around him, pulling him in deeper without moving. He growled a sexy, deep growl, and his head fell back onto his shoulders as he buried himself into my soft flesh to his balls.

My legs held high in the air as he began to fuck me, his eyes on me, his balls slapping against my open ass, and the penetration deeper than I’d ever felt made my orgasm roar through my body and explode onto him like a volcano erupting.

He stopped, taking in the sensation of my tightening cunt around his member, and then leaned down between my legs, letting his mouth press against mine.

“I could watch you orgasm all night,” he whispered, pulling away slowly and continuing his thrusts.

He swelled inside of me, let out a roar, and never took his eyes from me as his warm cum filled the condom, making me wish it were my throat it flooded.

Chapter Six

“What’s all this?” Carrie asked, pushing through my back door.

“Dinner for Carter,” I smiled.

She handed me a card and moved towards the meal that was on the stove. “This looks amazing.”

“I’m trying to keep it warm; he’s late,” I pouted.

“You two have become pretty close,” she acknowledged.

We had. It had been a week since we’d had sex and almost a month to the day since we’d met. I wanted to celebrate, but figured it may seem tacky or corny to Carter, so I used my acceptance into culinary school as an excuse to have a romantic night.

“I really like him,” I admitted, biting my bottom lip into my mouth.

“I know that look,” Carrie teased. “You more than like him,” she added with a grin.

I did. My feelings for him were growing fast, too fast. It was scaring me. I’d told myself I would take six months to get over Greg, and it was only a couple weeks since we’d broken up when Carter came walking into my life. How could I resist him?

My cheeks heated, and I knew they were turning pink from the stare Carrie was giving me. “It’s too soon for all that,” I scoffed.

“That’s not true. My grandma met my grandfather only six weeks before they married, and they’ve been together sixty-five years,” she boasted.

It was a story I’d heard time and time again, usually when she fell for a guy she’d just met, or had one date. “Yeah, it was nineteen-fifty, there weren’t as many options back then,” I teased.

“Oh, whatever. When you know, you know, end of story,” she snapped.

“Open your card,” she ordered.

I pulled the card from the envelope. It was a cute cat in a chef’s hat baking mice-shaped cookies. “I love it,” I said, appreciative that she’d been so supportive of me going back to school.

“Oh, so I heard Greg has a new girl, or at least that’s the rumor at the gym,” Carrie said.

It was a relief to know he was finally going to leave me alone, but still stung that she continued to go to his gym.

“Good, now maybe Carter won’t have to throw him in jail for stalking me,” I snapped.

“How late is he, anyway?” she asked, looking around at the pans all on low heat.

“About an hour,” I admitted, feeling sick as I said it aloud.

“Uh-oh,” she said, lifting her eyebrows high on her forehead.

“He’s probably just caught up at work,” I defended.

I’d been telling myself that he was just at work for the last couple hours, but it was becoming harder to believe. He’d always found time to text me while at work this past week, and I knew he’d call to ask if I needed anything before he headed my way.

Something was wrong. I didn’t know what, but there was something wrong. My mind reeled with the notion that maybe he was a player. He had that perfectly sized bed, his condoms within reach for the position he had me in that first night, and the sex, my God, the sex was mind-blowing. There’s no way he learned how to please a woman like that without some serious experience: player experience.

Maybe he was bored with me already. Maybe he had a one month rule to avoid commitment.

Carrie’s phone beeped, and she quickly pulled it from her purse. I knew she was waiting on the last guy she went out with to call, but her face told me it wasn’t him when she stared at the screen. “He still hasn’t called?” I asked.

She shook her head. “No, it’s just a news alert,” she said.

“A news alert? Since when do you care about the news?” I teased.

“Brian talked about current events all night long, and I didn’t have a clue. Maybe that’s why he wasn’t interested. So, I thought maybe, if he did call, I’d be ready this time,” she explained.

I tried my best not to look at her like she was pathetic, but it was tough. She was a beautiful woman, strong, smart, successful; the only thing wrong with her was her choice in men.

“So, what’s the alert?” I asked, trying to change the topic.

“Something about a bank robbery, and a standoff downtown,” she said.

My heart sank. “What does it say?” I panicked.

“I don’t know, I swiped it away,” she said.

I rushed into the living room and turned on the TV. It was all over the news. There were cop cars surrounding the small brick building, and vans, ambulances, firetrucks, and unmarked cars as far as the cameras could see. “My God, what if Carter’s there?” I gasped as Carrie’s arms wrapped around my shoulders.

I turned it up, listening to the updates as they happened. The robbery occurred several hours ago, but the news just got wind, and was blasting it on every station.

“Several hostages have been released, with only two remaining inside with what we believe to be at least three armed men,” the reporter said, her voice shaken from the chaos she was covering.

I moved back towards the couch, sitting down without taking my eyes from the TV. Carrie sat down beside me, sliding her arm over my shoulder to comfort me as I watched the mess unfold.

Gunshots went off and cops scurried everywhere. The reporter was out of breath as she ducked behind the news van, announcing what we’d all just heard. “Two gunshots, no idea if they were police or the gunmen inside,” she said, her voice still shaken.

The camera scanned the area, showing several of the officers as they readied their guns and took position. I didn’t see Carter, but in my heart, I knew he was there. “Two officers were shot by the gunmen, one in stable condition with a wound to the arm, no word on the other. They apprehended the suspects, released the hostages, and this is finally over,” she said, relief in her voice.

Tears rolled down my cheeks as I gripped my phone, frantically calling Carter over and over, only to get the voicemail.

Carrie tightened her grip on me, squeezing me tightly as I glued myself to the TV, waiting for more information. My phone was gripped so tightly in my hand it hurt, but I couldn’t let go. I tried calling again; again I got voicemail.

“I’m sure he’s fine,” Carrie offered her support.

The reporter looked a mess, her hair flying in the wind, her makeup smeared from her tears of fear during her coverage, but she continued on like the pro that she was, like Carter. He was a pro. I knew he was there, and I knew he’d be the one to volunteer to go in, to save those people and risk his life. He was that pro.

“Officer Harold Gehrig we’ve just learned was taken to the hospital to treat a gunshot wound to the arm; he is in stable condition and expected to be released in a few short hours,” the reporter said.

“What about the other one?” I yelled at the TV.

“We’ve not yet been given the name of the second officer shot, and have no information on his condition at this time,” she said sadly.

I knew what that meant. No name meant he was seriously hurt, or even dead. They couldn’t release his name until they notified the family. I wasn’t family. What if it was Carter? I didn’t even know where his mother lived to call and ask her, and she wouldn’t even know who I was. “I’m gonna be sick,” I said, rushing to the bathroom.

I leaned over the toilet, letting my stomach release the toxins created by the stress I was feeling. Carrie held my hair. “You can’t assume the worst,” she said softly.

“He would’ve called. He would’ve answered his phone,” I gasped, gagging out the last of my stomach’s contents into the porcelain bowl.

“This just ended. He can’t stop in the middle of a bank robbery to call you and let you know he’s okay. I’m sure he would’ve if he could’ve,” she said, handing me a cold, wet cloth for my face.

I leaned against the tub, placed the cloth on my forehead, and tried to believe her, tried to believe that Carter was okay and that he’d call any minute to tell me so himself.

My hand vibrated as my phone went off. Carter’s face lit up the screen, bringing me back from the doom I’d created as our fate. “Hello, are you okay?” I asked frantically as I answered.

“Yes. I’m so sorry. I wanted to call, but there wasn’t any time. I was afraid you’d see this mess on the news and fear the worst,” he soothed me when I should’ve been soothing him.

“I was watching. I mean, at first I just thought you stood me up, but then the news came on, and the gunshots…Carter, I thought it was you,” I sobbed into the phone.

“Naomi, baby, please don’t cry. I’m fine,” he insisted.

“They wouldn’t release the officer’s name, I thought he’d been killed, I thought it was you. They only tell the family; I’m not family, and I don’t know your family,” I rattled.

Carrie stroked my hair from my face and worked on getting me to slow down and breathe. “I didn’t mean to worry you,” he said.

I thought hearing his voice would’ve calmed me, but it didn’t. That feeling, that fear, it was real, it was strong, and I knew it wouldn’t be the last time I felt it if we stayed together. Could I handle this?

“I’m just glad you’re okay. What about the other officer?” I asked softly.

After a long pause, Carter took a deep breath, sighing into the phone. “I’m on my way over.”

The phone hung up and I fell into Carrie’s arms. “Yeah. You more than like this guy,” she whispered in my ear.

“I do,” I admitted.

“Can you handle this?” she asked.

I didn’t know. I was already questioning that myself. All I did know was I didn’t want to lose him.

“He’s on his way over,” I told her as she helped me to my feet.

I splashed cold water on my face and brushed my teeth. “I’m going to go,” Carrie said sweetly, kissing me on the cheek.

When Carter pulled into my drive, I ran to the truck, jumping into his arms before he could even unbuckle. I wanted to tell him I loved him, but I didn’t. I just held him, knowing what he’d gone through was much more than what I had for those brief moments of not knowing.

Chapter Seven

I woke up early, but didn’t get out of bed. I laid there awake, staring at Carter, the man I knew I was falling for, had probably already fallen for, but didn’t want to fully admit it.

He looked so peaceful, finally, after a restless night. He’d held me in his arms for an hour, not talking, not crying, but just holding me. His pain resonated through his breathing, his heartbeat, and pushed into me, even though he was trying to hide it. I knew he’d had a scary day, probably one of the worst he’d ever seen.

That officer, the one they wouldn’t name, was Michael Leo, a twenty-seven-year-old officer who’d just recently joined the force. He didn’t survive the gunshot to the head. It had killed him instantly, and without suffering, or so they said on every news station.

Carter didn’t talk about it, or him, but I could feel his pain as he held me.

He tossed and turned most of the night, mumbling gibberish I couldn’t understand. But now, he was peaceful. I didn’t dare move to wake him.

My heart ached at the thought of losing him. I stared at his features, taking them all in as if to remember them in case he suddenly vanished from my life. His squared chin, the scar above his lip, his thick dark eyelashes, and bushy brows, and the high cheekbones that made his cheeks round when he smiled, I wanted to remember it all.

“Good morning,” he mumbled, his eyes opening to see me staring at him.

“Good morning,” I said softly.

“I’m sorry if I kept you up,” he said.

“You didn’t keep me up. I couldn’t sleep,” I admitted.

He rolled towards me, pulling me into his warm chest. I could hear his heart beating hard and strong, and even though I feared he couldn’t keep himself safe, I felt safe in his embrace.

“What’s on your mind?” he asked, pulling back to stare into my eyes.

“I’m okay,” I said, not wanting to burden him with my stressful thoughts.

“Naomi, what is it?” he asked, pushing himself up against the headboard of my bed.

A thousand thoughts flashed through my head, and none of them were ones I wanted to share, at least not right now. “Do you wanna talk about last night?” he asked.

“No. I know it’s part of the job,” I said, tears starting to well up in my eyes.

“It is,” he agreed.

“Why do it?” I asked, fighting back my sobs.

“There’s a lot of good that comes with being a police officer, too,” he said. “I help people, every day, one way or another, I help them. If I died working as an auto mechanic, and a car fell on me, what would’ve I left behind? Nothing. If I die in the line of duty, it was protecting someone,” he said convincingly.

“What made you want to do this?” I asked, trying my best to understand where his heart and head collided.

“My dad was an abuser. He used to beat my mom, and me,” he said softly.

His eyes narrowed as he told the story about a drunken old man who seemed to hate life, hate living. “My mother always made excuses for him, saying he promised he wouldn’t do it again,” he sighed. “I wanted to be on the right side of the law, and have a chance to help people, people like my mom, like me,” he added.

My heart swelled so large inside my chest I thought I’d explode. I couldn’t imagine Carter growing up in a home like that, with a dad so angry and mean.

“That’s why I worry about you, why I want to protect you,” he said, stretching his arm over my shoulder and pulling me back into him.

“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” I whispered.

“It’s okay. If I hadn’t, I wouldn’t be doing what I do today, and I love what I do,” he said. “The real question is, can you handle being with someone who puts their life on the line every day without hesitation?” he asked.

I took a deep breath. “Yes. If it means being with you, then I can,” I said, even though I truly wasn’t sure I could deal with it.

“Good. Now, let’s get you some breakfast. I have to be at the station for a ceremony at noon,” he said without blinking an eye.

I slid out of the bed as Carter playfully slapped my ass. I knew he was hurting, that he’d been hurt most of his life, but he still managed to be kind, to be playful, to be himself.

Carter was dressed and standing at the bedroom door, staring at me lovingly as I slid a t-shirt on over my tank top. “I’m going like this,” I joked, motioning to my yoga pants, and then my hair on top of my head.

“I wouldn’t want you any other way,” he said.

“You’re not embarrassed to be seen with me?” I teased.

He moved towards me, pulling me into his arms. His lips pressed against mine, bursting into a passionate kiss that left me weak and dizzy. He had an effect on me all right, one that no one else ever had before. I’d learn to deal with his job, his risks, and just enjoy every moment I had with him.

“Let’s go, before I throw you down on this bed,” he gasped.

Today was our one month anniversary, and I wanted to tell him, but I didn’t. There were so many things I wanted to tell Carter that morning, but I couldn’t work up the nerve. I didn’t want to scare him off, and besides, it had been a horrible day the day before, and with what he had coming up at the station, it wasn’t going to be much better today.

“I’m ready,” I said with a smile.

He held my hand as we walked out of the bedroom and out the front door. I was looking towards Marlene’s house, not realizing what had made Carter stop in his tracks. “What the fuck?” he screamed, letting go of my hand.

I turned to see his truck, his shiny red truck that I knew he loved, covered in spray paint, the side mirrors ripped off and the windshield cracked. “Who would do such a thing?” I gasped.

“Greg, that’s who,” Carter snapped.

“Greg?” I asked, surprised he’d assume it was him.

“Yeah. Who the fuck else would’ve done this?” he asked, or more like yelled at me.

“Kids? I don’t know. But, I don’t think it was Greg,” I argued.

“Look around, Naomi. Do you see anyone else’s vehicle destroyed? No, just mine,” he roared.

“Look. I know Greg’s an ass, but he wouldn’t be stupid enough to vandalize a cop’s vehicle. And, I seriously don’t think he would stoop to this level,” I said.

“Wow, just fuckin’ wow!” Carter screamed. “I can’t believe you’re defending your ex right now,” he said under his breath.

“I’m not defending him, I just know him better than this,” I explained.

“You know him better? He wouldn’t stoop to this level, but he’d stoop to hitting a woman? You know him so well—but did you see that coming?” he snarled.

“No, but…” I stuttered.

“But nothing. Greg did this, and he’s gonna pay,” Carter scolded.

“You don’t know he did it. He’s been leaving me alone, and I even heard through the grapevine that he’s dating someone new, that he’s moved on,” I insisted.

“Oh, I know, and you know too. You’re just protecting him for some reason,” he said, his eyes glaring into mine.

“I’m not protecting him. I don’t want things riled up again; they’ve been smooth the last week or so. If you go accusing him of this, and he didn’t do it, what will that do?” I asked, my own voice starting to rise with anger and frustration.

“If he starts anything, he’ll end up in jail, where he belongs,” Carter said, walking around his truck, his eyes filling with pain and anger as he assessed the damage.

“We have a lot of the same clients. I just don’t want anything started between you two. We’ll eventually have to work together at some point,” I explained.

“Work together? You plan on working with him after what he did to you?” he asked, and then let out a strange laugh.

“I don’t plan to do anything, but we are in the same industry, so it’s possible,” I said.

“You’re still in love with him, aren’t you? You’re as crazy as my mother,” Carter hissed, pulling open his driver’s side door.

“Where are you going?” I pleaded as he started the truck, and put it into gear.

“Don’t worry your pretty little head about where I’m going,” he snapped, backing out of my drive, and then peeled his tires down my street so hard it left a puff of black smoke in the middle of the road.

Chapter Eight

Carrie brought me donuts after I called to tell her about my fight with Carter. “Are you sure that Greg wouldn’t do anything like that?” she asked, sipping her coffee.

“Carrie, a cop’s truck?” I asked, surprised she would even ask.

She knew Greg. She knew he could be a real prick, but he wasn’t stupid. Not stupid enough to do something like that.

“Why just his truck, though?” she asked.

Anger started boiling in my veins, and I wasn’t even sure why. It wasn’t about Greg, or defending him; I knew that. “I don’t know. Maybe one of his idiot friends did it, thinking they were doing him a favor,” I said quickly.

I made it obvious I wasn’t willing to discuss the possibility of Greg having any part of Carter’s vandalized truck. I didn’t want to admit that someone I’d been with, started a business with, and loved, could be that person. The fight, I could write that off as jealousy, hurt, and anger, a bad day. It was an act of passion, but Carter’s truck, that took planning, or a dumb punk kid with a spray can and a ball bat bored on a Saturday night.

“Are you going to see him again?” Carrie asked, her eyes wide and filled with confusion.

“I’ll call him when he’s had time to cool off,” I said, taking a bite of my donut.

When he cooled off, he’d see it wasn’t Greg who done that to his truck. He’d see I was right.

Carrie left for an appointment, leaving me to sulk about the fight. I knew Carter usually spent mornings with his mother on Sundays, but with the officer’s ceremony being held that afternoon, I doubted he’d planned on making it. Why hadn’t he wanted to go in the first place? Why take me to breakfast? Oh God, was he planning on taking me to his mother’s for breakfast before all this happened?

The entire day, I thought about Carter and what he must be going through. I hated for him to be alone, and wanted desperately to be by his side.

At four o’clock, I called his phone, figuring he’d had enough time to finish the private services at the station.

“Hello,” he answered, his tone cold and different than it’d ever been.

“I wanted to apologize to you, and make sure you were doing okay,” I said softly.

“Thank you. I’m doing fine. I’m sorry, too. I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that,” his tone softened as he spoke.

“Did you file a report?” I asked.

“Yes. It’s being handled,” he said quickly.

“How was the service?” I asked.

“Rough. It is just a reminder to all of us about what can happen each day,” he said.

“Would you like some company?” I asked.

“I’m heading to the bar with the guys. I don’t know how late we’ll be, or what shape I’ll be in afterward,” he said quickly. “I’ll talk to you later,” he added, and then hung up.

Maybe it was too soon. I was just glad I got to hear his voice and find out he wouldn’t be alone tonight.

The news plastered the story about the fallen officer all day long, announcing the services being held in just a couple days. All the officers from nearby counties would be in attendance, and a twenty-one gun salute would honor the man who had given his life for those hostages that day. My heart ached, wanting to hold Carter’s hand on that solemn day, but it didn’t sound like he was going to be ready for me by then, possibly not ever.

I never received a call from Carter on Sunday night, so I assumed he’d stayed out late and passed out drunk after being out with the guys. Monday, I sent a text wishing him a good morning and didn’t get anything back until that afternoon, and that was just an apology for not seeing the text.

Tuesday Carter called that morning, but only to tell me the details about the funeral service. He never asked me to go with him, and I didn’t ask. I wanted to call him that evening, but decided to leave him alone.

Wednesday, I called Carter, tired of the cold shoulder. “Can we talk?” I asked.

“Sure,” he said.

“I mean, in person.”

“Okay. I’m pretty swamped at work; how about after work on Friday?” he asked.

“You coming to me, or am I coming to you?” I asked.

“I’ll come to you. Around five-thirty,” he said, and then hung up.

His tone was not as angry, but it was still cold. It was all I was going to get, so at that point, I had to accept it. We’d talk Friday. Seeing him in person would be easier, and I’d know if he still had feelings for me or not.

Friday rolled around, and about five forty-five, I received a text from Carter.

Carter: Caught up at work; reschedule?

Me: Okay, call me when you get off, maybe we can meet up for a drink…

Nothing from Carter after that.

“Naomi, let’s go get a drink,” Carrie whined as she flopped on my couch.

“I was supposed to see Carter later, maybe,” I replied.

“It’s almost eight o’clock. He’s not gonna call. You have to quit sulking around this house,” she insisted.

“You’re right,” I said, feeling a sudden surge of strength and independence.

Carrie lit up, jumping to her feet, and pulling me into my bedroom to find a cute outfit. She knew of a new club, she always did, and we were gonna take it by storm, or so she promised.

An hour later, we were pulling up to the valet parking to the newest, hottest club in L.A. Carrie’s hair flowed down the backless red dress she’d found buried in my closet, and she walked with a confidence I envied.

I followed closely behind her as we entered the crowded club, wearing my favorite cobalt-blue cocktail dress with matching high heels. My hair was curled and bouncing from my shoulders as we pushed through to find a couple seats at the bar.

It didn’t take long for Carrie to spot a handsome man in a designer suit a couple seats down and start flirting with him with her smile, and her bedroom eyes.

“Can I buy you ladies a drink?” he asked, moving to the empty seat next to Carrie. She giggled, flipped her hair, and thanked him as he tore her attention away from me. After the first drink, she gripped my arm, excusing us to the ladies room, and pulled me towards the back of the club.

“You need to have some fun,” she urged.

“I’m just not in the mood. I thought I could be, but I miss Carter,” I pouted.

“Do you want to go?” she asked.

“No. Your guy seems nice. Have fun. I’ll be fine,” I promised.

She gave me a glare, but she knew me well enough to know I wouldn’t budge. I wanted her to enjoy herself, and at least I was out of the house. Baby steps.

I stared at my phone, pondering whether or not to call Carter while sipping on my third drink. Carrie was enthralled in whatever her suit was saying, and he seemed more than happy to be talking. An egomaniac, he’ll be good for one night of fun. Poor Carrie; why can’t she see these idiots for what they are?

Before my brain could rationalize all the reasons not to text Carter, I’d already created it and hit send.

Me: I niss you, I need yoo! Can I come ovr and smuggle into your wart chess?

Shit! I was trying to text without Carrie catching me, and of course alcohol didn’t help my typing skills. It was a mess. He’d probably look at it and delete my number, block me from his life for good.

Carter: Where are you?

My heart raced when he responded so quickly.

Me: Patio

My phone started ringing with Carter’s face on the screen. I slid my thumb to answer, and then yelled ‘hold on’ into the phone as I made my way outside and away from the loud music.

“Who are you out with?” he asked.

“Carrie,” I replied. “Why didn’t you call me?” I asked.

“I was working late,” he said.

He sounded sleepy. I looked at the clock; it was already midnight. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize it was so late,” I apologized.

“No. I was just thinking about you, actually,” he said sweetly, the tone I’d been missing for so long. “I don’t want you driving. I’ll send a car,” he said.

“Okay,” I agreed.

He told me he’d call an Uber and send me the details about the car and driver through text. I rushed back into the club, pulled Carrie away from her man long enough to tell her I was leaving to go see Carter, and then hugged her goodbye.

The black Kia Forte with a driver named Dave showed up just as Carter promised.

Carter was standing on his front porch when the driver pulled into his drive. I got out, walked towards him, and instantly fell into his arms.

“I’ve missed you,” I said, leaning up to kiss his sweet, delicious lips.

The same spark ignited, sending us into a passionate embrace while the driver pulled away.

Carter scooped me up into his arms, carried me into the house, and kicked his door shut. My body exploded with thunderous sexual arousal, ready for anything and everything he was about to give me.

He carried me into the living room and gently tossed me onto his oversized sofa. I squealed when I landed, bouncing from the cushion and feeling lightheaded from my buzz. “I’ve missed you like crazy,” he said, leaning into me, kissing me with more passion than the last.

I gripped my arms around his neck and pulled him to the side of me. I leaped onto him, straddling his already-hard cock with my blue dress pulled to my hips so my legs would spread.

My hands worked the waistline of his sleep pants, sliding them down with his help as our mouths locked together, hungry for one another’s flavor.

I pushed him back into the couch once his cock was unleashed, and then slowly slid down his body until my knees were on the floor. My mouth teased him, gently blowing hot air on his tip, and then licking around the rim like he was my favorite ice cream cone.

His gasps and groans worked me up, making me want to please him more than ever. I worked up saliva in my mouth, and then slowly pushed my mouth down onto him.

My hand rolled his balls in its palm, feeling the warmth of his sex as the flavor of his manhood filled my mouth and throat. His balls tightened in my hand, and I knew he was getting close. As much as I wanted to taste his salty-sweet cum slide down my throat, I couldn’t deny the ache between my legs.

“Do you have a condom?” I asked, lifting up and letting my tongue flick at the head of his hard cock.

He leaned over, slid one from the pocket of his sleep pants that were on the sofa next to him in a wad, and handed it to me.

I slid the rubber from the package, and then placed it on the tip of his cock. Instead of using my fingers to roll it down the shaft, I pushed it down with my mouth, making him moan and twitch.

I slid my panties off, teasing him with a little peek of my bare pussy under my dress before straddling him.

His hands pulled at my dress, tugging the front down enough that my breasts fell out and became fair game for his mouth and tongue.

The aching between my legs brought me to a new place, a new sense of passion and sexuality that I’d never experienced. I wanted control. I wanted to fuck him.

I pushed him back onto the sofa, taking my breasts from his reach. My hand slid between my legs, rubbing my swollen clit for a quick relief before gripping his cock and guiding it into my wet cunt.

My body throbbed as I lowered onto him, my weight pushing him deep inside of my body. He growled, gripping my hips tight, letting his fingers dig into my soft flesh as I rocked towards him, then away, then back again.

The pace was mine to control: slow, fast, hard, and gentle. I loved making him sigh, making his eyes roll back in his head, and most of all, I loved making him smile at me with those eyes.

My body lifted from him, leaving just the tip of his cock inside me. I situated my feet on either side of him in a squatting position and then lifted my dress over my head, tossing it onto the floor.

I spread my pussy open with two fingers, giving him a clear view of his manhood gliding inside the tight, glistening pink hole between my legs as I lowered onto him.

His eyes lingered on our sex, watching in amazement, a view I wasn’t sure he’d ever had before. When he lifted his eyes from between my legs and let them lock onto mine, we both began to throb, coming together in perfect harmony.

It was a lot of work being the one to fuck someone. My breathing was rapid, my heartbeat wild, and my body felt as though it was made of Jell-O.

I lifted from him, my legs wobbly and trembling as I stood in the high heels. His eyes took me in, his lips curled into a smile, and in that moment, it felt like ‘us’ again.

“I like it when you’re drinking,” he chuckled.

I walked towards the kitchen, wearing nothing but my blue heels, and grabbed two beers from the fridge. “Then let’s continue,” I smirked, handing one to Carter.

It was warm snuggled up beside him, and the beer helped soothe my throat from all the moaning. “I don’t want to stay away from you again,” I admitted.

“Me either,” he agreed, pulling me in close.

“I’m really sorry about your truck,” I said, understanding that seeing it in that shape was devastating, and of course he’d be irrational.

“It’s okay. It’s been fingerprinted, and they’ll be pulling Greg in for questioning Monday morning when I start my shift,” he said calmly.

“What?” I said, lifting my head, and suddenly not so comfortable.

“Yeah. We just need his fingerprints. Since he was never booked, or charged in your case, there’s nothing on record,” he said, sipping his beer, and then smiling in my direction.

“So, you don’t know that it’s him? You just still think so, and you’re gonna pull him in, fingerprint him, and then what?” I asked, my anger boiling deep in the pit of my stomach.

“Arrest him, I imagine,” he chuckled.

“And if he didn’t do it?” I snapped.

“That’s a very slim chance,” he smirked.

I stood up, grabbed my dress, and slid it back onto my body. “I told you, I didn’t think he would do something like that. I told you, I knew he wouldn’t do something like that,” I yelled, gripping my phone and opening my Uber app.

“Where are you going?” Carter asked.

I ordered a ride and headed for the door.

“I thought you said you were sorry,” he said, following me as he slid on his sleep pants.

“I was sorry, for getting so upset, but I didn’t think you’d still do something I asked you not to, just on a hunch,” I hissed.

“A hunch? It’s my job to have a hunch, and be right,” he said loudly.

“Just because you grew up with an abuser doesn’t mean you can spot one a mile away,” I said.

“Yes, it does,” he snapped.

“Oh, yeah? Then why did you haul me in, and not Greg?” I asked, smirking in his face.

“I was doing my job. Domestic violence cases are never truthful, at least not a hundred percent, on either side. We follow protocol to protect women, but when we show up to a witness and a bleeding man, what are we supposed to do?” he snapped.

I was so glad to see the silver Camry pull into the drive. There was nothing left to talk about, or yell about. He was hauling Greg in, he would be proven innocent, and then he’d come after Carter, and most likely me. So much for my peaceful life.

Chapter Nine

My stomach was in knots all weekend, wondering what Greg was going to do after he was questioned by Carter.

Monday morning, I got up, headed to the grocery store, and planned on trying to enjoy my day off. Culinary school started that night, so I took off to relax, but that was before Carter told me his plans. I wasn’t relaxed at all.

The store was calming, my usual place of solitude. I could lose myself, or whatever stress I had going on, in the aisles, just browsing through all the ingredients, dreaming of dishes for my clients.

I’d finally decided that it was best to walk away from both Greg and Carter. If Greg wanted to retaliate against me for something I didn’t have anything to do with—well, there was nothing I could do to stop him. If Carter wanted to believe he knew everything about everybody, then I couldn’t stop him, either.

It was a mistake moving on so quickly, I’d known it then, and I certainly knew it now. I was taking my six months, maybe even a year. I would finish school, work on building my business, and focus on myself.

“Is this kale?” I turned to see Carter standing at the produce section with collard greens in his hand.

He caught me off-guard, but he was so handsome, his smile so kind, it was hard to avoid smiling back. “No,” I said, taking it from him, and replacing it where it belonged.

I grabbed the kale, placed it in his cart, and noticed he had two steaks, a bottle of wine, and sea salt. My stomach churned at the thought of him moving on so quickly, already planning a special dinner for someone new. That took an entire minute.

“Thanks,” he said.

My jealousy and pain inched up from the deep pit where I’d stuffed it as I smiled, and started to walk away.

“Wait,” he said, reaching towards my arm.

When his hand gripped my elbow, a spark ignited and sent familiar feelings between my legs. I hated that he still got to me.

His eyes were wide and filled with kindness as he stared at me. “I just wanted you to know I didn’t bring Greg in. You’re right; there’s no reason to stir anything up,” he said. I was shocked. “I just thought you should know. So you didn’t have to worry,” he added with a smile, and then walked away.

Why did I sleep with him that night? Why did I go there drunk? If only I’d taken Carrie’s advice, and found someone new that night, a one-night stand, I wouldn’t have this painful ache in my heart right now.

I left my cart and headed to my car. Tears were already forming in my eyes, and I knew I couldn’t hold it together if he spoke to me again. I missed him terribly, more than I’d ever missed Greg. Greg!

I stopped in my tracks as I exited the store, spotting Greg sitting in his truck near my car. My heart raced as I wondered if maybe Carter lied to me, that he in fact had called Greg into the station and didn’t want to admit he was wrong. No, he wouldn’t do that. If anything, Carter was an honest man, a good man.

Why was he there, sitting in his truck, acting shady, and so close to my car?

Part of me wanted to go back inside and grab Carter, ask him for help. No, I couldn’t handle seeing him, and I certainly didn’t need him playing my knight in shining armor while trying to get over him.

I took a deep breath, told myself I was being silly. It was a coincidence. The parking lot was full; it was a local store where Greg shopped too, and maybe he hadn’t even noticed my car.

My fingers fumbled with my key in the door lock, not wanting to hit the unlock button and cause Greg to look up and notice me. I slid inside, peered through my rearview mirror, and didn’t notice Greg paying any attention to me.

Relief fell over me as I started my car and pulled out of the parking lot and headed towards home.

At the first stop light, I noticed Greg’s truck behind me a few cars back. I watched carefully as he took every turn I took. I reached for my phone, dialed Carter, but got his voice mail.

I started to panic as I pulled onto my street, and Greg’s truck followed. As I pulled into the driveway, I half-expected Greg to drive on by, but instead, he blocked my drive and got out of his truck.

I dialed Carter again, still no answer. Greg tapped on my window. “Get out of the car,” he said calmly.

My phone was still clutched in my hand, squeezing so hard it was leaving an impression on my skin. “What do you want?” I asked through the rolled up car window.

“You’re being ridiculous. I left something, and I need it,” he said.

He did seem calm. And as I sat there in my driveway with my car doors locked, my windows up, and frantically clenching my phone on which I’d dialed Carter twice, I felt ridiculous.

“What did you leave?” I asked.

“Seriously?” he asked with a chuckle. “It’s my grandmother’s quilt,” he said calmly.

I remembered seeing it in the top of the closet, so I was beginning to feel even more ridiculous.

“You’re really overreacting, don’t you think?” he asked with a smile.

I opened the car door, still clutching my phone in my hand. “I’ll grab it for you,” I said quickly.

“There are a couple other things I need to grab in the closet, and something in the laundry room,” he said.

“I can get e’m,” I said sternly.

“No. I can get them myself. What are you worried about?” he laughed.

His calmness and constant need to make me feel foolish for being protective had me rattled. I agreed, called Carter one more time, still no answer, and then called Carrie as I opened my front door.

“Sorry I didn’t call you back. Greg was following me and stopped here to grab a few things from the house. I just wanted to let you know as soon as I’m done here, I’ll be right over,” I said to a confused Carrie on the other end of my phone.

“Stay on the phone,” she demanded.

Greg didn’t appear violent or angry. He disappeared into my bedroom, and I knew I needed to keep an eye on him. “I’ll leave the phone on, but don’t talk. I have to pretend like we hung up,” I said, quickly stuffing my phone into my jacket.

Chapter Ten

I followed Greg into my bedroom, standing in the doorway just in case I needed a quick escape if things escalated.

He held the quilt in his hand as he pushed past me in the doorway. “Is that all you need?” I asked.

He didn’t respond. I followed him into the laundry room where he looked around, opened a cabinet, and then walked back to the living room. “Where’d your little piggy run off to?” he laughed.

His lips snarled under his nose as he laughed, and that same black stare returned in his eyes from the day he’d attacked me.

“If you have everything you need, you should go. You’re not even supposed to be here,” I reminded him.

“I’ll leave when I’m ready. Guess your little piggy realized this is a dangerous neighborhood for pigs, and their trucks,” he snarled as he laughed again.

“You did that?” I asked, shocked that I had been so wrong about him.

“What? Left a friendly note? Sure.”

I reached into my purse, pulling out my phone. “Call the police,” I screamed into the receiver just before Greg slapped it out of my hand.

“Who was that? You got a new man already?” Greg rolled his eyes and then stretched his head back, snapping his neck with a gruesome noise.

I backed up slowly, making my way to the door when he lunged at me, gripping my arm and pulling me towards him.

His breath reeked of wheatgrass as he pushed his mouth against mine. I screamed, kicked, and tried to get away, but he was too strong. “What do you want?” I cried as he slung me onto the couch.

“I own you. I made you. You can’t just walk away,” he growled, reaching for the buckle on his jeans.

I rolled from the couch onto the floor, crawling as fast as I could towards the door. Pain surged through the back of my head as Greg gripped my ponytail, pulling me backward and slamming my head into the coffee table.

This was it. I should’ve listened to Carter. Why hadn’t I listened?

Without Carter patrolling the block, there would be at least five to ten more minutes before the police could arrive in this neighborhood, if in fact Carrie heard me before my phone had been smashed into pieces against the wall. That would give Greg time to do what he wanted, and probably get away.

“When I’m done with you, your little pig friend is gonna get his, and then whoever else you’ve been fuckin’, you little whore,” Greg warned.

“Leave him alone. He left me. It’s me you’re mad at, not him,” I pleaded.

“Oh, no. I’m mad at both of you,” he insisted, his eyes twitching as he spoke.

The front door pushed open and Carter rushed in, slamming Greg against the wall. They scuffled, and in the mix, it was hard to tell who was winning, and who was losing.

They were both on the floor, rolling around as fists flew in every direction. I screamed when Greg’s fist landed on Carter, hard enough I could hear the bone in his nose break.

Carter got up on his feet, swinging wildly at Greg, landing every other punch. Greg’s arms were muscular, but not long enough to match Carter’s reach.

Greg stumbled back, hitting his back onto the wall and knocking my pictures off, before he finally gave in, sliding to the floor surrounded by broken glass.

I rushed to Carter, safe in his arms, and sorry I’d ever doubted his judgment. “Thank you,” I said, looking up at his bloodied face.

Four other officers rushed in, cuffed Greg, and hauled him out to the cruiser.

“Did Carrie call you?” I asked, curious as to how he knew to come.

“No. I hired a detective to follow Greg, to make sure he wasn’t causing you any trouble,” he explained.

“So, you knew he was at the grocery store?” I asked.

“My guy called me as he was leaving. He’d lost track of him for about twenty minutes. I knew you had been there, so I assumed the worst. You know, a hunch,” he smiled. “Anyway. I called the guys, told them to head this way, and voila,” he said.

“He did do that to your truck,” I said.

“I know,” he replied.

“Why didn’t you haul him in?” I asked.

“I was afraid he might come after you, like you said. But, I knew once you started defending him, there would be little I could do to protect you,” he sighed.

“I watched my mother talk cops out of taking my dad away many a time. She’d lie and tell them she fell, that he was drunk, loud, but not abusive. The doctors all knew, though. No kid, no matter how rambunctious, breaks their arm in the same place five times in two years. You were showing all the signs, and I couldn’t stand to watch it again. I’m sorry I bailed on you, reacted the way I did. It just brought back some bad memories, and that feeling of helplessness; I never wanted to have that with you,” he said.

“I can’t thank you enough, or tell you how sorry I am,” I pleaded.

“Don’t be sorry. And no need to thank me. I’m just glad you’re okay. You know, I knew you’d let him get close again. When you didn’t want him picked up for harassing you in the parking lot that day, and you hadn’t reported the phone calls he’d made, it was clear that you trusted him, even after what he’d done. I didn’t want you hurt.” Carter wrapped his arms around me and squeezed me tight against his chest.

His heart was pounding ninety miles an hour, hard against his chest. “Don’t ever scare me like that again,” he gasped, kissing the top of my head.

“I won’t. I promise.”

Another officer came in and took my statement while Carrie rushed into the living room. “I called the police, but they were already dispatched,” she said with confusion in her tone.

“Carter called them, on a hunch,” I smiled.

I suddenly realized that Carter wasn’t on duty. He’d been shopping for a romantic dinner earlier, and probably had plans he needed to keep. “You better get going,” I said, smiling without any jealousy or rage in my heart.

“Going?” he asked.

“That steak dinner you were shopping for, some lucky lady deserves not to be stood up,” I smiled.

I knew at that moment I loved that man, I mean, truly loved him. It was no longer about ‘us’ or myself; it was only about his happiness. That was all I wanted, for Carter Reynolds, super cop, super lover, superman, to be happy, even if that meant not being with me.

“There’s no other woman, Naomi,” he grinned.

 “But your dinner?” I asked, confused.

“I was trying to recreate your dinner, our first one, but with steak instead of shrimp,” he laughed.

“So, there’s no one else?” I asked, tears welling up in my eyes as my heart swelled in my chest.

He shook his head, smiling, his eyes dancing on mine. “No way. What do you say, I take you to my place and cook for you?” he asked.

“What do you say, we make a quick stop at the hospital and let them look at that nose, then I’ll cook for you,” I replied.

“I can live with that. Will you be drinking? I can stop at the liquor store and get you some whiskey, rum, tequila; what’s your poison?” he teased.

I tiptoed to him, kissing him on the lips. He gripped me tightly, caressing my back as my fingers ran through his thick, dark hair. “I love you,” I whispered.

“I love you,” he said sweetly. “But, don’t forget those blue heels,” he laughed.

Epilogue

Carter worked his way to the top faster than most. He was promoted to detective in the special victims unit and was being given an award for his heroism, dedication, and loyalty to the force.

He was beaming as we took our seats at our table. The banquet hall was decorated in police blue and gold. It was beautiful. He deserved it. He deserved every bit of it.

The day he singlehandedly took down Greg Stevens, well, that was only the beginning of his three-year streak of heroism. He saved five kids from an abandoned school building that they accidentally caught on fire. He took down one of the most notorious sex traffickers in the country by working around the clock following leads. He even took a bullet to the chest to save a woman from her drunken, angry husband. Thank God for bullet-proof vests.

Yes, Carter Reynolds deserved this banquet.

I never went home after that day Greg attacked me for the second time. I stayed with Carter, and it was the best move I’d ever made, besides leaving the gym and taking off on my own.

Business was booming, and I’d hired seven personal trainers, and four personal chefs to help with the workload. I was considering expanding outside of Los Angeles soon. With Carter by my side, I knew I could do anything; we could do anything.

His sergeant took the podium, praising Carter for all his efforts, his accomplishments, and his dedication. You could tell that the man had a spot in his heart for Carter, just from the way he spoke about him.

He was finally pulled on stage, his cheeks blushing red, and his demeanor somewhat shy. He didn’t like being fussed over, and I knew that was partly due to his childhood, never having a dad show any pride or affection towards him.

I watched with admiration as he smiled, thanked everyone in the force, and told a few stories about his fellow officers, ones that he felt should be up there beside him accepting the award.

When his eyes turned to me, I started to tear up. I knew he was getting ready to become sentimental, probably embarrassing me with his own praises. “This woman,” he said, walking off the stage, and taking the mic with him.

“She’s stood by me through it all, stayed up nights worrying, cried herself to sleep, but smiled each morning before sending me off to work. She’s the one I have to thank the most. Without her, I’d have no reason to come home at night. She is the one I’m trying to make the world a better place for, she’s the one I’m protecting each time I start my shift.”

He was standing at our table; the spotlight shone on me as he spouted out his kind words to a room full of colleagues, friends, and what we now considered family.

“This award, this promotion, it means a whole hell of a lot to me. But, there’s one thing that would mean more.”

Carter dropped to his knee by my chair. My tears flooded my eyes, falling recklessly down my cheeks and into my lap. He extended a hand, a black velvet box in his palm. “Naomi Tate. Would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?” he asked, opening the box to reveal a gorgeous diamond ring.

The entire banquet hall fell silent, everyone awaiting my response. “Yes!” I squealed, leaping into his arms, and covering his face with kisses as he worked to get the ring on my frantic finger.

The entire place cheered and applauded, and after Carter gave adequate attention to his new bride-to-be, he took the mic back to the stage. “Now, I’m the happiest man in the world. I have it all,” he shouted into the mic, and then rushed back to his seat beside me.

  “I don’t want to wait, either. I want to plan this wedding right away. I’ve lived my life without you as my wife long enough,” he declared with a wide smile on his face.

“I’m glad you want to move quickly,” I said sweetly, squeezing his hand in mine.

“Oh, yeah? You can’t stand another moment being Ms. Tate, just want to be Mrs. Reynolds?” he laughed.

“Yes. And I had a surprise for you for when we got home. But, I think I should give it to you now,” I smirked.

“What’s that?” he asked.

“Are you certain you’re the happiest you can be?” I asked.

“I am,” he said sternly.

“And, nothing could make you happier? You already have it all?” I asked.

“Of course. This has made my life complete,” he said, his eyes growing confused by my taunting.

“Well, I believe I can make you even happier,” I stated firmly.

“You’re killin’ me, woman. Out with it,” he demanded, his face turning flush, and his lips tightening with anticipation.

“I went to the doctor this morning. I’m pregnant,” I announced.

Carter jumped out of his seat, gripped my hands, and pulled me to my feet. He pulled me to the stage as I struggled to stay in my spot on the floor. His strength and his excitement won out, pulling me to the platform where I had to face the entire crowd.

“My bride-to-be just informed me that she could make me even happier. Even though I didn’t think it possible, she did it,” he announced loudly in the microphone as his voice echoed off the walls.

“We’re having a baby!” He howled like a wolf causing others from his squad to join in.

“So, now I’m the happiest man in the world, with everything I could ever want,” he announced.

“I can still make you happier,” I leaned into the mic so everyone could hear.

Carter turned to me, his face filled with confusion. “Now she’s just showing off,” he said into the mic as everyone laughed.

“Twins,” I said loudly into the mic, and then turned to watch Carter’s expression.

His mouth fell open, his eyes filled with tears, and his arms scooped me up, pulling me close to his chest.

The warmth of his breath against my neck tickled, sending goosebumps down my spine. He kissed me softly on the cheek, tears streaming. He thanked everyone, but it was hard to understand as he sobbed with joy.

Everyone stood, clapping loudly and cheering as we took our seats.

They all laughed when the next speaker took the stage, asking how in the hell he was going to top that. He couldn’t. We were the top. The cherry of life. That was us. I couldn’t wait to start building our sundae.

Click here to get my book Mr. Billionaire for FREE

MR ROOMMATE

By Ivy Jordan

This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places and incidents are products of the writer's imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locales or organizations is entirely coincidental.

Copyright © 2017 Ivy Jordan

 Chapter One

“I’m not sure I can do this, or that I want to do this,” I whined as Lark gripped my hand, pulling me from the couch.

“You need a place to stay, and Benny says he’s a real cool guy,” Lark said.

“But, living with a man?” I sighed, wrinkling my nose to show my disgust.

Lark laughed, pushing her mousy-brown hair off her shoulder, and flashing her large green eyes in my direction.

“At least meet him. Benny said the place is amazing, and you’ll have plenty of privacy,” Lark urged.

“If it’s so great, then why’s he moving out?” I scoffed, pushing my hand to my hip.

Lark rolled her eyes as she smiled. “Willow, he’s getting married. Quit trying to find the bad, and look at the good.”

It was good, almost too good to be true. A place in the city, so close to my photography club, for what he was asking in rent was unheard of. There had to be a catch.

“You need outta here, right?” she asked with a smirk.

I watched her eyes roll around the small apartment where three other girls lived. It was a long commute to the city, which was not only where the photography club met, but was also where most of my clients wanted me to work. This was my first option when I moved to New York after college, and with my income, it felt like my only option. Luckily, Sara, my friend from college, was nice enough to make room for me in her tiny shared apartment. By ‘room,’ I mean, I have a place on the couch to sleep, and my clothes are stacked on a shelf under the TV stand.

“Yes. I need outta here,” I sighed.

“I honestly don’t know how you’ve lived like this as long as you have,” Lark said.

“It’s only been a month,” I stated.

Her eyes rolled, and she let out a sigh. “I would’ve died.”

She was being dramatic, as Lark often was, but she was right: it wasn’t great. The walls had chipped paint, there were only two bedrooms, and four women living in the apartment, and there had been a smell—one I could neither recognize nor find the source of—ever since I’d moved in.

“Okay. I’ll meet him,” I agreed with half a smile.

“Good. Let’s get outta here. That smell—God, what is it?” she asked, covering her nose.

I shrugged and laughed. “Wish I knew.”

The cab ride into the city gave me plenty of time to come up with a million reasons why this wasn’t a good idea.

Reason one: he’s a man. Reason two: he’s a man. Reason three: well, maybe not a million reasons, but one really good one: he was a man!

“Thank you,” Lark said sweetly, handing the cabbie a twenty.

I followed her into the cozy bar with the large red door, figuring we’d find Theo at one of the tables waiting. I’d already pictured him in my mind as a nerdy, computer-geek type of guy. He probably had greasy hair, thick-rimmed glasses, and pimples, even though he was twenty-four.

Lark pulled me towards the bar, finding two open seats at the corner. A beautiful man with thick, dark hair, steely-blue eyes, and a smile that could melt away my panties moved towards us. “What can I get ya, beautiful ladies?” he asked.

“A pitcher of light draft,” she said quickly.

“Holy shit, he’s hot,” I whispered to Lark as he winked and walked away.

“Well, that’s a bonus,” she smiled.

“A bonus?” I asked.

“Yeah. If you’re gonna live with a man, might as well be a hot one,” she grinned.

“That’s Theo?” I asked, my mouth hanging open, and my eyes struggling not to look in his direction.

“Theo, this is Willow. Benny said you were looking for a roommate,” Lark said as he returned.

I hadn’t digested the information she’d just fed me yet, and my heart was still fluttering.

“So, you must be Lark. Lark and Willow; those are a couple of beautiful names for two beautiful ladies,” his eyes lingered on mine while his lips curled into one of the sexiest smiles I’d ever seen.

“Yes. Willow wanted to meet you. Benny said it was fine to come by tonight. I hope you don’t mind,” Lark said.

“Saturdays don’t get busy in here until around ten. Now, if you’d come by last night, you could’ve seen me play,” he said, his eyes moving towards the stage.

“You’re a musician?” I asked, suddenly less attracted to the handsome man.

“Sure am,” he said proudly, his smile growing as his eyes stared into mine for a reaction. Did he expect me to squeal like a groupie, maybe wet my panties?

“I dated a musician,” I snapped, quickly lifting my beer glass to my lips.

Lark gave me a quick apologetic glance. It was bad enough that she knew he was a bartender, but a musician? Ugh!

“You act like that’s a bad thing,” he said, his smile slipping from his face.

“Oh, it is,” I laughed.

“Not all musicians are bad,” he said, sliding his long fingers through his hair.

“Yeah, right,” I rolled my eyes.

“Aww. That’s not fair. I can change your mind,” he said.

“You have your work cut out for you, there,” I chuckled.

A tall blonde was standing at the other end of the bar, her breasts falling out of her Barbie-doll dress and laying on the wood. “I better take care of her. Do you still want to hear about the room?” he asked.

I swallowed hard. Did I?

My thoughts drifted to Mac, my ex. He was the typical rock-star type. He’d spent more time practicing, playing shitty gigs, and tuning his guitar than he ever had with me. The only thing he loved more than his music was his groupies. I wasn’t sure anyone could ever change my mind about musicians, especially this smooth operator. Could I live with him?

“Wow, you’re really pondering that question,” he laughed.

A smile crept up on my face. “Okay. Sure. Doesn’t hurt to get the information,” I said sternly.

I watched him lean in and smile as he took the blonde’s order. “Wow, he is really hot,” Lark sighed.

“Yeah. Why the hell didn’t you tell me he was a bartender and a freakin’ musician?” I screeched.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t think it would matter. I honestly thought he’d be more like Benny,” Lark said quickly.

I’d never met Benny, but Lark had mentioned he was a computer tech. I had just assumed Theo would be a computer geek from that one statement, so I couldn’t blame her for that, I guess.

“I just don’t know if I can handle this,” I said.

“You’re not dating him. You’re just going to be roommates. Benny said he’s hardly there,” Lark insisted.

Theo talked to the other bartender, pointing in my direction. He walked around the bar and took a seat beside me, smiling wildly. “What?” I asked nervously.

“So, you are just moving out of Mom and Dad’s?” he asked with a smirk.

“Don’t do that,” I said quickly.

“Do what?” he asked, lifting his eyebrows high on his forehead.

“Try to read me,” I snapped.

“Oh? Like you did me?” he smiled.

“Touché,” I said.

“Seriously, though. First time on your own?” he asked.

“No. I finished college last year. I moved to New York a few months ago,” I replied.

“You been staying with Lark? Two birds nesting in the big city?” he chuckled.

“No. A friend from college, and her two other roommates,” I sighed.

“Ouch,” he scrunched his face and then laughed.

“So, what are you looking for?” he asked.

“Mainly, a place closer to the city,” I replied.

“Okay. My place is just a couple blocks from here. You work in the city?” he asked.

“Yes,” I replied, not offering any further details about my life. “So, tell me about the place. The rent sounds pretty cheap for the city,” I said.

“Oh, so you’re afraid it’s a dump?” he laughed.

I fought my smile, but lost. A laugh rolled through my throat, and my cheeks were burning with embarrassment.

“It’s okay. I would be worried too,” he said sweetly.

He reached across the bar, grabbing a napkin and a pen. “Here,” he said, scribbling an address on the paper.

“Come by tomorrow around two. If you like it, we can talk logistics,” he said as he slid the napkin towards me.

“Okay,” I agreed.

When he got up from his barstool, my eyes looked upward, taking in his muscular, tall frame. His eyes caught mine, causing me to blush.

His smile was warm and soothing.

“I’ll see ya tomorrow, Willow,” he said softly and walked back around to the working side of the bar.

I finished my drink quickly, ready for my exit. “You’re gonna go?” Lark asked as we waved goodbye to Theo.

“I’ll check it out,” I said sternly.

Her smile widened on her face, and her eyes glared at me with judgment. u

“Like you said, we’d just be roommates. We wouldn’t be dating,” I insisted, not sure who I was trying to convince—her, or myself.

Chapter Two

Lark had a wedding to shoot, so she couldn’t go with me to Theo’s. I was a little uneasy about showing up alone, but figured if I was considering living with him, I’d better get used to being alone with him.

The cab pulled up to the address Theo had given me. I double-checked the napkin. “This is the right address?” I asked, showing the napkin to the cabbie.

He nodded, seemed annoyed at my hesitance, and motioned to his meter. “Twelve dollars,” he said quickly.

I handed him a ten and a five, opened the door, and stepped out onto the cobblestone sidewalk. The tall, red-brick building was scrunched between two others that looked just like it. A wide set of stairs led to a pristine white door with a majestic gold, curved handle. Thick, gold numbers hung on the brick, slanted to read 582. “This can’t be right,” I whispered to myself, taking a deep breath before ringing the doorbell.

The chimes sounded, echoing a tune that was familiar. Stairway to Heaven?

I stood there for what felt like an eternity, waiting for someone to come to the door. I was certain it was the wrong address, or that Lark had misunderstood the rent amount.

I heard shuffling on the other side of the door, and then it opened. Theo was sliding a t-shirt over his head, and my eyes couldn’t help but notice the rippled abs as the material fell over them. Holy shit!

“I’m sorry. I was getting in a quick workout,” he boasted.

Yeah, perfectly timed to show off his body to me.

I tried to act unimpressed, even though the tingle between my legs was stating otherwise. “That’s cool. I thought I had the wrong place. Was that Stairway to Heaven?” I was rattling.

“Right place, and yes. I had it custom made,” he smiled.  “I’m sorry. Come in,” he said, moving from the doorway and motioning me inside.

I hoped my nerves weren’t visible, but the heat on my cheeks told me they most likely were. “Thank you,” I said softly, walking past him and taking in the scent of his testosterone and whatever cologne he was wearing before he started his workout.

The place was impressive, too impressive for what he was asking. I must’ve gotten bad information from Lark. I stood on white granite at the entry, staring out at the large main room. A spiral staircase swirled with curves so unique they made me dizzy to follow, and a large hall opened into what looked to be the kitchen. The only thing that seemed properly in place was the pool table in a room to the right that had large French doors, most likely an office or den. Everything else in the home looked too stylish for a bartender, a man, a musician. “This place is amazing,” I stammered, my mouth still hanging open in awe. “I’m not sure I can afford the rent here,” I admitted, feeling stupid for wasting his time.

“Didn’t Benny tell you the amount?” he asked.

“Benny told Lark, but I think she may have forgotten a zero at the end,” I laughed.

“What did she tell you?” he asked.

“Eight-hundred,” I said softly, feeling the number was offensive.

It wasn’t the best neighborhood. I mean, it wasn’t Madison Avenue, but it was still the Upper West Side. I’d priced studio apartments in the city, ones that were not even large enough for a full-size bed, that were triple that amount.

“That’s what I’m asking. Is that too much?” he asked.

I shook my head, unable to speak. I swallowed hard, realizing it was loud enough that he probably heard.

“Good,” he smiled.

“That just seems really low,” I said, looking around the large home.

“Well, that’s what it is,” he grinned.

My shoulders loosened staring at him. His smile was amazing, too amazing. He had to know what effect he had on women, on me. Of course he did; he was a musician, a conceited rocker, a womanizer, just like my ex. I could see it in his beautiful blue eyes.

“Let me show you around,” he said, clearing his throat.

I followed him around the place, starting with the main room. “I’m never in here,” he admitted. The large sectional looked like a pile of clouds that you could get lost in while watching movies on Lifetime. “I could live in here,” I laughed.

Next, he showed me the den, where his pool table was the focal point of the room. There were a couple rock band posters on the wall, but not much else. “This is where I have a beer and cool off after a show,” he smiled.

He led me through the large hall and past the spiral staircase, showing me a closet, a half bath, and a pantry on the way to the kitchen. “Another room I’m never in,” he laughed.

I stared at the granite countertops, the beautiful crystal light fixtures that dangled like diamonds from the tall ceilings, and the island complete with sink, stove top, and two cute bar stools next to the counter space. “Do you cook?” he asked.

I shook my head. I wished I did.

He showed me the laundry room, which was piled with dirty clothes, and then opened a door off the kitchen that led to a small gym. This must be where he worked up that deliciously dangerous scent that oozed from his body.

“You would be welcome to use the gym anytime you wanted. Benny never did, the fat, lazy bastard,” he laughed, obviously being playful about his friend’s lack of interest in fitness.

“Out here, there’s a small patio, and a narrow ladder to the roof. I don’t recommend using it, though. Safer to get to it from upstairs,” he said.

I peeked out the kitchen door to a small brick patio. A worn table with a missing glass top sat in between two less-than-impressive chairs. “That’s cool,” I said, trying not to show my excitement. A patio, the roof? Eight-hundred dollars? I was beaming inside.

“Okay, I know it’s only the second time we’ve met, but would you like to see the bedrooms?” he asked with a smirk so hot it burnt my cheeks.

“I usually don’t move so quickly, but sure,” I laughed.

Oh my God, was I flirting? Stop it, Willow.

He walked to the staircase and then stopped, motioning for me to go first. I took the first step, and then the next, until finally realizing that he was probably only wanting to check out my ass. My steps started to move quicker, making it to the top of the stairs in what felt like record time. “Okay. Straight down the hall is my room,” he said softly.

That tingle between my legs returned, and my panties started to cling to my skin. “That is a bathroom,” he said, pointing to the door on the left.

As I walked by, I peeked inside. It wasn’t very big, but it was clean. “There’s no tub, but the shower has some amazing jets,” he informed me, lifting his eyebrows high on his forehead as he spoke.

I missed having a tub, but the jets did have me intrigued. Were we sharing a bathroom? I wondered.

“Your room would be right here,” he said, taking a step ahead of me and opening the door just past the bathroom and across the hall.

The room was larger than I expected it to be, and had a window that overlooked the sidewalk. “At night, you can see the city light up,” he said.

There were boxes everywhere, and clothes strewn all over the king-sized bed. I was excited to finally sleep in a real bed, and not the worn, itchy couch that poked springs into my sides where I lived in estrogen hell.

“Benny will be getting the rest of his stuff this week. I have to help him move the bed,” he said, crushing my dream of sleeping on what looked to be the softest bed in the entire world.

“Okay,” I said softly, masking my disappointment with a smile.

It’s okay. I’ll buy my own bed. I have some money saved.

I walked deeper into the room, staring out the window and imagining what it’d be like to see the city lights while I edited my photos at night. Heaven. It would be like heaven. Theo’s doorbell sounded in my head. This truly was the stairway to heaven.

“Holy shit!” I said, quickly slapping my hand over my mouth in shame.

Theo moved towards me, smiling, and his eyes dancing as they pushed into me. “What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Nothing’s wrong. It’s this closet. It’s larger than most apartments’ I’ve looked at,” I exclaimed.

Yes, I was exaggerating, but it was huge.

“It’s not that big. But, hey, good to know you’re easily impressed,” he chuckled, letting his tongue slide to his top lip and linger just long enough for my tingle to return.

“Okay, last room,” he said, moving towards the bedroom door.

I followed him out, and then down the hall towards the door he said led to his room. “I don’t need to see your room,” I said, hesitating.

“There are two things you may find useful in there,” he said with a smirk.

I stared at him, struggling to figure out if he was teasing, being serious, or coming on to me. “Maybe three, but from your face, I’m gonna stick with two,” he laughed.

His eyes narrowed, creating a cat-eye shape that only made them sexier. “Lighten up. I’m just teasing,” he assured me.

I smiled nervously and followed him to his bedroom. As he opened the door, my heart raced, fearful, maybe excited, about why he wanted me in there, and what would happen next.

“Don’t mind the mess,” he said, picking up clothes from the floor, and tossing them into a basket as he walked inside.

My eyes lingered on his bed, unmade, messy, huge, and plush. The thick mattress stopped at my hip. “Wow. If you date short girls, they’d need a step stool to come to bed,” I laughed.

His laugh echoed through the room, somewhat nervous, possibly just surprised by my candor. “I like my women tall enough to get into bed without help, but not so tall that they don’t have to tiptoe to kiss me. That’s fuckin’ hot,” he sighed.

I could feel myself lifting to my toes to kiss Theo. He was tall, maybe six-foot-five, and I was only five-foot-six. Yes, I would have to tiptoe to kiss Theo. Stop it, Willow. You’re doing it again.

“So, what is it I would find useful in here?” I asked, quickly changing the subject.

“First,” he said, moving towards the back of the room.

His arm stretched outward, motioning me to check out whatever was behind the door he just pushed open. I moved towards him, peeking into the door. We were close, so close. His strong, manly scent was oozing with pheromones.

My eyes shifted around the bathroom, noticing first the messy sink with hair product, cologne bottles, and an assortment of creams all over the counter. I quickly glanced past the toilet, happy that I didn’t have to share with Theo, and then noticed what it was he wanted to show me. “A tub,” I sighed pleasantly.

“Yes. I know how you girls like to take bubble baths. So, you can use it anytime you want,” he said.

I noticed his language was changing from could use, would be able to use, to can use. Was he ready to offer me the place? If he did, was I ready to accept?

“That’s one thing; what’s the second?” I asked, almost afraid he would pull out his cock. That would be something Mac would do. The asshole.

Theo moved to his back wall, pulling open a thick set of curtains that instantly allowed the sun to blast into the room. “I like it dark when I sleep, especially since it’s usually during the day. Blackout curtains are amazing,” he smirked.

A French door was situated in the center of a large window that opened to a small metal platform that looked like a fire escape. “This is the only way to get to the roof in one piece,” he said playfully, flinging open the door and stepping outside.

The metal platform he stood on shook as his weight shifted, causing me to let out a squeal. “It’s safe,” he said, extending his hand for me to take.

“I dunno,” I shuddered.

“Trust me,” he said sweetly.

I took a deep breath, took his hand, and stepped out onto the rickety platform. There was barely enough room for us both. His hands rested on my hips, steadying me as he laughed softly, letting his warm breath hit the back of my neck. “You go first,” he insisted.

I wasn’t afraid of heights, but I’d never been a big fan of them, either. This shaky platform seemed more of a threat than the two metal stairs that led to what appeared to be solid concrete. “Okay,” I sighed, taking the first step.

The stairs rocked a little, or the platform did; either way, it made me squeal. I quickly made the steps, stopping on the concrete platform and taking in a deep breath.

Theo was laughing. His eyes turned almost gray in the sunlight, hypnotizing me the longer I stared into them. “It’s not funny,” I whined playfully.

“I know. It’s just, well, you squeal a lot,” he chuckled.

I rolled my eyes, not pleased with his amusement. “This isn’t safe,” I scorned.

“Sure it is,” he said, taking the two steps without hesitation.

“Go on up,” he said, motioning me towards the final set of stairs. At least these were brick, non-shaky, and offered a railing to hold onto.

At the top, my breath was taken away. We were on the roof, and not just any roof. We were on a roof that overlooked the city. “I bet it’s amazing at night up here,” I sighed.

“It’s spectacular,” he boasted, walking towards me.

There was an outdoor sectional in one corner, the cushions tucked underneath and wrapped in plastic. “What’s that?” I asked, pointing towards a round tub.

“Hot tub,” he smiled.

“Are you serious?” I squealed again, catching it too late to stop it. He laughed.

“Yeah. It’s a great place to just hang out,” he said.

“Yeah. You mean, it’s a great place to seduce the ladies,” I replied with a smirk.

His face told me that was his main intention for the space. I imagined it’d been used dozens of times, hell, maybe even hundreds.

Theo’s smooth charm, bedroom eyes, and intoxicating good looks were enough to get him nearly any woman he wanted, adding the fact he was a bartender, and a musician, well, that took care of the rest. Except this girl. I’d been down that road before, and I wasn’t willing to travel it again.

“I’m not like that. I told you, not all musicians are bad guys. I’ll prove that to you, Willow,” he smiled. There was that smooth charm again, just oozing from his perfect, plump, kissable lips. God, how I wanted to kiss him.

“Sure,” I laughed nervously, fearing that he may, in fact, prove me wrong. Then what?

“Well, it’s a little chilly up here, and you aren’t dressed for the wind. Let’s get you down from here,” he said sweetly.

My arms had started to grow goosebumps from the wind. It was almost spring. I could smell it in the air, see it on the trees, but the sun just wasn’t quite warm enough today for the short sleeves I wore. Another week, maybe two, and I’d be breaking out the shorts.

I let Theo lower to the metal platform first, and then extend his hand to help me. The stairs shook, and then the platform, sending me quickly into his arms to safety. He didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around me, and he didn’t seem too eager to let go once he had me against his chest. “You okay?” he asked. I could hear the laughter fighting to be heard in his voice.

I pulled away, stared up into his eyes, and thought about what he’d said about a woman’s height. If I tiptoed, I could reach his mouth, just barely. Ugh, why did he have to be so damn hot?

Chapter Three

I hated to pull away from the safety of Theo’s strong arms, but I hated myself even more for wanting so desperately to stay snug within them. His demeanor changed as he pulled away, softened somehow, became a bit nervous, even.

“Are you hungry?” he asked.

I shrugged, not sure if I wanted to admit I was starving. “Have you eaten lunch?” he asked.

It was already close to three o’clock, but my nerves about our meeting had my stomach twisted, and I was unable to eat. “No,” I said softly.

“Well, since neither of us can cook, you wanna grab a bite at the bar?” he asked.

Now my stomach was really in knots. “I can grab something on my way home,” I stammered.

“C’mon. It’ll give us a chance to get to know one another. Besides, I do have some ground rules if we decide we’re a fit,” he said sternly.

Listening to his voice take the tone of an authority made me giggle. “What?” he asked, his lips curling into a sexy crooked smile.

“Ground rules?” I asked playfully.

“Of course. Ya know, stuff like, you can’t fall in love with me,” he chuckled, then winked.

I smirked, scrunching my nose up as I rolled my eyes. “Whatever,” I sighed.

“Let’s go,” he said, almost whining.

“Okay,” I agreed.

Theo pointed to houses as we walked the three blocks to the bar, telling me who lived inside. He knew nearly all his neighbors, which for New York was oddly delightful. “Have you lived here your entire life?” I asked.

“Yes. With my grandma,” he said softly.

I didn’t ask where she was, assuming she’d passed on and left him the home. That at least explained why the rent was so cheap. But he could get a ton more, he had to know that.

“A lot of the people have moved on, but there are still some of the original ones left on the block,” he said, raising his hand to wave to an elderly man on a stoop we passed.

The bar was close to empty, with only a couple sitting in a booth, and three men at the bar arguing over the game on the TV. “Hey, Sal,” he greeted the bartender.

“You workin’ today?” the man asked.

Theo shook his head and smiled. “No, sir,” he said, heading behind the bar to serve himself.

“Light beer, right?” he asked, gripping a pitcher in one hand.

I nodded.

Sal smiled at me, with that kind of smile that insinuated I was a hook-up. I turned away, staring around the large bar, reading the funny signs, glancing at the couple in the booth, and then my eyes landed on the stage. I could picture Theo up there, playing, singing, whatever it was he did in the band. It made the tingle between my legs return, but also made my skin crawl at the thought of him eating up all the attention the groupies threw at him.

“Let’s grab this booth,” he said, moving past me with a pitcher full of beer and two large pilsners in his hands.

He slid into the booth, setting the beer and glasses on the table. I slid in across from him, immediately taking the role of server and pouring our beers.

“Wow, you’ve never poured beer before, have you?” he teased as the head rolled quickly to, and then over, the top of the glass.

I smiled, blushed, and then gripped my glass, quickly pulling it to my lips. “I ordered us a large extreme nacho and basket of chicken wings to share. That’s all they have worth eating here,” he explained.

I nodded, not really caring what we ate. I could stare into his steely blues all day long.

“So, you obviously aren’t a bartender. What do you do?” he asked.

“I’m a photographer,” I said proudly.

It felt good to say it aloud. I hadn’t often, since most people I knew already were aware of my profession and didn’t ask. “That’s super cool,” he said, suddenly sounding like a rocker.

“What do you photograph?” he asked.

“Mostly people, but I’ve been picking up a lot of work from marketing firms,” I said, and then took a long sip of my beer.

“Maybe you could take the photos for our new album cover?” he asked.

My eyebrows rose in surprise. “You have an album?”

“Almost. We’ve been working on our originals, and it won’t be long ‘til we need a cover for our demo,” he boasted.

“Sure. I’d love to do that,” I said. “So, what do you play?”

“I play the guitar, and I’m the lead singer,” he said, the pride beaming through his smile.

We chatted about our work, surprisingly, and Theo asked quite a few questions about my career, and even seemed interested. It was obvious he loved talking about his band, but he was gracious enough to not consume our conversation with it. “So what are these ground rules?” I asked.

“Does that mean you’re interested?” he smiled.

“Maybe. Depends on the ground rules,” I teased.

“They are not rules really, just basic understandings of my lifestyle. I come in late, sleep during the day most times, and I don’t cook, so the Chinese delivery guy knows me by name,” he laughed.

“That shouldn’t be a problem. I keep odd hours, too, and your schedule wouldn’t bother me,” I said.

“As far as company, there is a request,” he said, his voice quieting.

Here it comes. He’s going to tell me how he parades a slew of women through the house, and he doesn’t want someone judging him. Too late. I’m judging.

I leaned back in my seat, took a deep breath, and waited for the drum roll. “I’m not a fan of bringing strangers home. I mean, if you’re dating someone, that’s different. It’s just the random hookups that would be a deal breaker,” he stammered.

My mouth fell open; I knew it did, I could feel my jaw drop. This was not what I expected, at all. “I’ve never had a random hookup in my life,” I said softly, feeling dirty just talking about it.

His eyes narrowed. “Never?” he asked playfully.

I shook my head. “I’ve had three relationships, and only two serious. Tim Haggard in high school, he was a jock, and I was a cheerleader, so it was more of an assumed relationship than anything else. Michael Rowland, he was my boyfriend my first year in college, and then Mac, the musician,” I was rattling again.

“Wow. I didn’t expect you to give me your spreadsheet, but hey, that works,” he chuckled.

I blushed. “I ramble when I get nervous,” I explained.

“It’s great. Makes getting to know you go much quicker,” he said with a grin.

“So, you think you could handle being my roommate?” he asked.

I smiled. “Yes,” I agreed, almost too eagerly to hide.

The week between my meeting with Theo and the Saturday I was moving in felt like an eternity. The shared apartment I was living in somehow felt even more cramped after seeing Theo’s place. Everything I owned was packed and loaded into my car, and I gave Sara a quick hug. I truly appreciated her helping me out with a place to stay, but I was ready to roll out of there. So ready.

Theo was sweet, greeting me outside the townhome and helping me load my boxes into the house, and up the spiral staircase. “Do you have a truck coming?” he asked, setting the last box on the floor of my new room.

“No. This is it,” I said, forcing a smile.

“No bed?” he asked.

I shrugged. “I have one on order. It should be delivered in the next day or so,” I explained.

“I’m sure we can find a place for you to sleep,” he said with a wink.

My pussy reacted with a twitch, but my mind immediately threw into defense gear. “The couch will be just fine,” I said sternly.

“I wasn’t implying anything,” he acted dramatically offended.

“Uh huh,” I laughed.

“I’ve gotta head out to the bar. Are you gonna be okay here? You can tag along,” he offered.

“I’ll be fine. I have a lot of unpacking to do, and some work to catch up on,” I assured him.

“I just know I hate staying the night in a strange place,” he said, his eyebrows lifting with concern.

“This is hardly a strange place,” I smirked.

“Well, I’ll be working late, so if you need anything, just call,” he said.

It was sweet that he was so concerned, worried that I’d be afraid to be alone. I’d been dreaming of alone time. Three months in that tiny apartment with four women—alone was all I wanted to be.

I pushed him out the door, promised him I’d be just fine, and started unpacking my boxes.

My clothes barely took up any space in the enormous closet, leaving plenty of room for me to go shopping, finally. I steered clear of the stores while living with Sara. I knew there was no room to put anything as it was, and with the three other women in the apartment all sharing clothes, I’d most likely never see it again anyhow.

By eleven o’clock, I was settled on the couch with my laptop, editing photos and working on my plans for Theo’s upcoming shoot. The wind picked up, whistling through the streets, slapping at garbage can lids, and rolling debris down the lonely sidewalks. It was starting to feel a little too lonely, and a part of me wished I had tagged along with Theo. I couldn’t now. Not after I acted so strong and capable of staying in a new place, alone. Ugh!

I zeroed in on my work, pushing out any odd noise I heard, or at least trying to. The wedding shoot I’d helped Lark with a couple weeks ago was finally edited, and I had my schedule for the week lined up. I looked at the clock, figuring it had to be close to the time when Theo would be coming in, but it was barely one o’clock.

I turned on the TV for background noise and finished the plans for Theo’s shoot. He’d told me the band name was Lion’s Den, and they played mostly hard rock when covering, and their original stuff resembled bands like Nirvana, Stone Temple Pilots, and Green Day. 

I wasn’t a real rock fan, but after listening to the bands he claimed to resemble on my phone, I was excited to hear them play. The mixture of American rock and punk intrigued me. Maybe they were good enough to get their album in the hands of a big time producer. Mac, my ex, his band played heavy metal, and some classic rock, but never even thought about creating their own stuff. I loved the artsy side of Theo that wanted to create his own music. I couldn’t wait to hear it.

The door opened and my heart beat hard against my chest. Theo looked surprised to see me still up. “I’m sorry. Did I scare you?” he asked.

“No,” I lied.

His eyes filled with concern as they stared into mine. Damn, why was he so sweet? I’d almost prefer if he was a dick, waltzing in with a slut on each arm to take to his room, or his rooftop terrace. This guy, the one that seemed genuinely concerned, and the one that looked at me so lovingly, I couldn’t handle him.

“I thought about sending you a text to let you know I was on my way, but I was afraid I’d wake you,” he said, moving toward the couch—my bed.

When he sat down beside me, my heart started racing fast in my chest, so hard I feared he could hear it slamming against my ribcage. “You stay up because you missed me?” he teased.

“No. I told you, I had a lot of work to do,” I giggled. Why did I giggle? He was making me nervous sitting so close to me, so late at night, and on my bed. Okay, so it was his couch, but tonight, it was my bed.

“What have you been working on?” he asked, leaning over my shoulder to my laptop.

I still had the photos open from some of the bands he’d mentioned, splattered all over my Word document as a collage for inspiration. “What’s all this?” he asked.

Damn, he smelled so good as he leaned closer.

His cheek was so close to my lips, I could’ve just stretched them out and planted them right on his scruffy skin. “I was working on inspiration for your photo shoot,” I explained.

His head turned, his lips now so close to mine, his eyes so deeply penetrating me that my pussy throbbed.

“That’s super cool, Willow. So, you think you have time to do it?” he asked. “I mean, I know you’re busy, and it’s not a rush at all. We’re on your schedule,” he added quickly.

“How about a week from this coming Tuesday?” I asked, figuring that would give me enough time to hear them play, meet the other band members, and get inside their heads.

His hand rested on my knee as he leaned back. His smile made me dizzy, and his eyes intoxicated me with their excitement. “Thank you, Willow. The guys will be psyched,” he said softly, pushing himself up, and onto his feet. Suddenly, I missed him in my bed.

Chapter Four

When I was introduced to Benny, my first reaction was to slap Lark. She made him out to be a tech geek, but the man with his hand extended to me had green, spiked hair and wore a long, black goatee and combat boots. She knew all along that Theo wasn’t a nerd, especially if she’d assumed him to be anything like Benny.

“Nice to meet you,” I said as politely as I could through my cloud of confusion.

“How do you like my old room?” he asked.

His smile was gentle, not at all like his rugged appearance. “It’s actually quite amazing,” I admitted.

Theo was beaming at my compliment, and his eyes danced on Benny as if he awaited one from him as well.

“I’m not sure why you gave it up,” I laughed.

A waitress with bright-red hair cut short to her neck, dark-brown eyes, and bushy eyebrows gripped Benny around the waist. “I’m why,” she smiled, extending her hand and introducing herself as Kayla, his fiancée.

The rest of the band came in, taking their turns introducing themselves. Benny was the drummer, and Theo the lead singer, who often played lead guitar as well. The next one I met was Samson, the bass player. He had long white hair, gorgeous green eyes, and an almost scrawny frame. The other guitarist, Paul, was shorter than me, was covered in tattoos, and didn’t seem interested in the shoot, or in meeting me, for that matter.

I placed a few photos from bands I liked on the table, spreading them out so they could all get a good look. “So, you’re just gonna copy those, are you?” Paul asked in a British accent I hadn’t noticed when he introduced himself.

“Not at all,” I said, smiling politely to the rude little man. “What I want is for each of you to pick your favorite album cover,” I explained.

Benny and Theo quickly grabbed theirs, Samson said he liked the Stone Temple Pilots’ one that Theo grabbed, and Paul chose one that was left.

We looked for something the covers had in common, and what we came up with was simplicity. “Okay, so you all agree less is more,” I smiled.

“Damn. We would’ve argued over what we wanted for an hour,” Benny laughed.

“I’m used to working with children,” I smirked, which even got a smile from Paul.

They all agreed they wanted the bar as their location for the shoot, and I agreed, as long as they were willing to try a couple spots I’d chosen, as well.

I hated that my week had been so busy, that I hadn’t had time to hear them play, but watching them together gave me plenty of inspiration for some great shots. Most of the ones I planned on actually using were ones they weren’t quite ready for, figuring they’d be much happier with the end result.

Inside the bar was dark and drab, and offered very little color or cool backdrops, so I took them on a walk, just about a block from the bar. There was an old abandoned building on the corner; something about it intrigued me, and I hoped it would them, as well. As the guys all started talking—well, arguing—about what they believed the building was at one time, I snapped shots. They started getting playful, shoving one another, and then Paul jumped on Benny’s back. They were having a great time, and I was getting the shots I’d envisioned.

When we got back to the bar, Paul apologized for being an ass. “I didn’t think I was going to enjoy this,” he said kindly.

I gathered up the photos I’d used as props, shoved them into my bag, and found Theo. “I’m late for my photo club. I have to run,” I said quickly, and then rushed out to my car.

I pulled into the small brick building’s parking lot. Lark was already there, standing out front, on her phone in deep conversation with whoever was on the other end. I finished organizing my equipment, which had become a messy tangle from rushing so quickly from the bar, when I noticed Theo’s car pull in beside me. I opened my door and started to get out of my car when Theo came running up to me. “Hey, so this is where your secret meetings are?” he asked with a wide smile.

I’d been fighting off feelings for him all week, and the more I tended to ignore him, the friendlier he’d become. I stared into his eyes, mine narrowing with anger that he’d followed me here. “It’s not a secret meeting, but it is private,” I snapped.

“I, uh, just….” Theo stuttered.

“I know we live together, and you’ve invited me into your world, but that was for business. This is the one thing I do that is all mine, and you can’t just push your way into it without being invited,” I scolded him as he pulled a black bag from behind his back. It was my camera. Shit!

“You left this at the bar. I just figured you’d need it,” he said softly, a hint of irritation displayed in his voice behind a large dose of hurt feelings. I was such an ass.

“I’m sorry, Theo. Thank you for being so considerate,” I apologized.

He smiled, but didn’t speak. There was an awkward silence that grew between us for the first time. “Hey, you coming in, or what?” Lark asked, stepping beside me.

“Yeah. Theo brought my camera. I forgot it at the bar,” I explained.

“Well, you may not need it anyway,” she growled.

“Why?” I asked.

“Our model canceled and we can’t get anyone to replace him this quickly,” she whined. “One of us could do it, I guess,” Lark stammered as her eyes moved to Theo.

“No. Then one of you will miss out on the lighting techniques. I can’t pose and teach,” I sulked. “I’ve been working on this for two months. Did he say why he couldn’t make it?” I asked, as if it mattered.

“Shingles. He’s highly contagious,” Lark replied, her eyes moving up and down on Theo, who was obviously growing uncomfortable. “Theo, what do you have going on right now?” Lark asked.

“I’m headed home,” his tone was still sour from my earlier mistaken assumption.

“”Oh, no. Theo can’t fill in. He’s not a model,” I said quickly, causing Theo to give me an offended glare.

“Look at him: he’s hot. He should be a model. Theo, do you want to be a model?” Lark asked, speaking quickly, and growing so excited she began to bounce.

“Not really,” Theo replied his smile weak and anxious, and his eyes pushing towards me with a look of desperation in them.

“Please, Theo. You’re our only hope. And, you’d be perfect; right, Willow?” she said, quickly turning to me.

“Yes. He actually would be perfect,” I admitted reluctantly.

I really didn’t want Theo to be my main focus for the next two hours. I was having a hard enough time keeping my mind off of his dreamy eyes and kissable lips. This was not going to help.

“What do I have to do?” Theo asked with a sigh.

His shoulders fell limp, as if he’d been defeated. Lark bounced high off the pavement, and then leaped towards Theo, wrapping her arms around his neck and squeezing hard enough that he looked terrified as he pulled her hands apart, and slipped from her embrace.

“You just have to sit on a motorcycle, several different poses,” I explained.

“I’m not really the biker type,” he said with a smirk.

“We need a still object for the shutter speed techniques,” I said sternly.

“I have my guitar in the car. Would that work?” he asked.

Lark’s eyes were wide and bright as she stared at me for a response. Theo didn’t look as if he gave two shits and would’ve preferred to just go home. “Sure. We can throw in a few lessons on photography in motion,” I agreed.

“I’m really sorry. I’ve just been on edge lately,” I whispered to Theo as we followed Lark towards the building.

“It’s okay. I get it,” he said coolly.

His tone was sharp, cutting me like a knife. “Thank you for doing this,” I sighed, hating that he’d been put on the spot.

I’d worked with models dozens of times during college, posing them how I wanted, and never once did it give me this strange flutter in my stomach. Every time I touched Theo, it felt so intimate, so sensual, that I was certain my anxiety was showing all over my face. Theo smiled as I moved his hand over the guitar strings so the light would allow focus on his hand, and not his body. I blushed as our touch created a surge of electricity through my veins. His eyes were so dark, so deep as they looked into mine that for that split second, I was certain he’d felt it, too.

The girls all loved Theo and begged him to come back again. He slid his guitar into its soft case and smiled politely. “I’ve had fun. Maybe, if I’m not busy,” he offered as a weak promise.

His movements were so smooth, so perfect, that it was hard not to watch him as he gathered his stuff and said his goodbyes to the giddy photography class. He slid his hand through his hair, letting his fingers glide through the thick strands of darkness. I watched as they swallowed them up, wishing for an instant my fingers could feel that sensation.

“We okay?” Theo asked, pulling me from my trance.

“Yes. I’m truly sorry. I know you weren’t stalking me. I’m not sure what my problem is, but it isn’t you,” I assured him.

The truth was, Theo was my problem. I thought about him constantly, fantasized about him in my dreams, and even caught myself thinking of him while masturbating in the shower. He was a big problem.

Chapter Five

Theo gripped the mic, letting his guitar sling to his waist by its strap as he yelled goodnight to the crowd of cheering patrons. They were good, real good. When Theo sang one of his originals, his eyes locked onto mine. My heart fluttered like a teenage groupie for a moment, but then I noticed the crowd of women all dancing to get his attention near the stage. I knew that game. I’d played it a dozen times with Mac. He’d sing to me, make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, and then disappear to the back for a blowjob from one of the groupies. When I’d question him, accuse him, and even the time I caught him with his dick in some brunette’s mouth, he’d tell me he loved me, there was no one else but me. Didn’t you see me sing that song to you, baby? I didn’t do that for anyone else. It was all bullshit, and Theo was smoother than Mac ever dreamed of being, and actually had talent, to boot.

“They are amazing, aren’t they?” Lark asked, leaning into my ear from her bar stool.

“Yeah. They really are,” I said, feeling that stupid flutter again.

Theo jumped from the small stage, making his way through the crowd of women to walk towards me and Lark. Yes, my heart sped up as I watched him smile politely, stopping only to sign an autograph and never taking his focus off of where he was headed.

“What’d ya think?” Theo asked.

“I loved you—it,” I stammered, my cheeks heating instantly from my stumble with words.

“I’m so glad,” he said, his eyes turning a bright shade of sky blue.

I wasn’t sure why it meant so much that I liked his music, but for some reason, it made me feel good that it did.

“You girls enjoy your drinks. I have to go sell some music,” Theo said, sliding his hand onto my leg, letting it rest there for a moment before taking it away. The heat from his hand remained, even once he walked away. I watched him surround himself with fans, mostly women, and turn his charm on them as he pushed his demo CD’s on them to purchase. Remember, he’s a musician, Willow.

“What’s going on between you two?” Lark asked. Her tone was high-pitched and giddy.

“Nothing,” I snapped back a reply quickly.

Her eyes narrowed, her lips curled into a tight smile, and she nodded in my direction with that ‘I know what you did’ look on her face.

“Your bed hasn’t been delivered yet, has it? You sleeping in the master bedroom with Theo to stay warm at night?” she teased.

“Wow! You know me better than that,” I laughed.

“I know, I know. You’re Miss Goody Two Shoes,” she groaned. “But, it’s obvious you two have something brewing,” she added with a smirk.

I sucked down what was left in my beer glass and lifted the pitcher for a refill.

“Oh, I hit a nerve,” Lark said, moving her face to mine until our eyes met.

“Nope. No nerve,” I said calmly.

“Willow, he sang that entire song to you,” she purred.

“I don’t think so,” I lied.

“Yes. Yes, he did,” Lark smirked. “He likes you, and it’s obvious you like him, too,” she insisted.

“He’s a musician, which you knew and didn’t tell me. And you knew he was hot,” I scolded, trying to keep a straight face.

The beer was getting to me, making me light-headed, and for some reason, it also made everything seem a little bit funny. “It doesn’t matter that he’s a musician. He’s nothing like Mac,” Lark said, her tone and her face both serious.

“They are all alike,” I giggled, pointing to Theo, who at that moment had a blonde on each arm, and Samson taking a picture.

“He’s promoting his band. Benny said he never fooled around, that he had one girlfriend in the seven years he’s known him,” Lark spilled information I’d never heard before.

“Guys stick together. He isn’t gonna tell you his buddy is a hound. Hell, Benny may be one, too,” I growled.

“Willow, that isn’t fair. I’m just saying, don’t push him away because of someone else’s mistakes,” she warned, finishing her beer with a quick swig.

Lark knew how badly Mac had ripped my heart out, so why would she want me to go through that again?

Did she see something in Theo that I didn’t? No, I saw it. It was something different, something special, and it scared the living shit out of me.

“I’m grabbing a ride home with Benny and Kayla. You okay?” she asked, waving to Benny, who was standing at the door motioning for her to c’mon.

“I’m fine. I’m just a couple blocks away,” I smiled.

“Yes. And, I know Theo wouldn’t let you walk this late alone,” she smirked, and then took off towards Benny before I could say something snarky.

I paid my tab, left Sal a nice tip, and then headed towards the front doors. Theo was still surrounded by women, all batting their eyelashes, laughing for no reason, and pushing their breasts towards his face in a sad attempt to be selected for a one night stand with a not-so-famous rock star. Okay, so maybe Theo had a real good chance of being famous, and then that lucky girl could say, “I fucked him when”—but right now, it was just sad.

“Willow,” Theo’s voice called out.

I turned, surprised that he noticed me. “Wait up,” he said, picking up his guitar, and making his way from the circle of pussy smothering him.

“I’m just headed home. You don’t have to walk me. Stay, enjoy your fans,” I said as sweetly as I could muster without throwing up in my mouth.

“No thank you. I like to get outta here quick after a good set. Sell my CDs and then head home for a beer and game of pool,” he laughed.

“You play solo?” I asked, my eyebrows rising to show my confusion.

“Benny used to play. I forgot that’s part of the ground rules: my roommate has to play pool with me after a gig,” he grinned.

“I’m not very good,” I admitted.

“Good. I don’t like losing,” he laughed, wrapping his arm around me and pulling me close to his side.

My body tensed as his arm fell over my shoulder. “You gotta be cold,” he said, pulling me in even closer to his side.

“It actually feels good out here. It was sweltering in that bar,” I replied.

Theo lifted his arm from me and smiled. “Okay. I don’t want to make you hot. Well, hotter,” he grinned.
I knew he was flirting. He couldn’t have been more obvious.

I was relieved to be home, not wanting to admit I actually was cold. His arm around me was nice and warm, but the closeness was too intimate. It was to the point where I wasn’t as worried about trusting Theo as I was myself.

“Home, sweet home,” Theo announced, opening up the front door, and motioning for me to enter first.

He disappeared into the kitchen where I heard bottles clanking together. “Beer, my fair lady,” he said in a horrible British accent.

“You sound like Paul,” I teased.

He rolled his eyes. “Okay. I’ll never try that accent again.”

“Is Paul even British?” I asked, watching Theo’s eyes brighten with laughter.

“No. He was born and raised in Jersey,” Theo chuckled.

I tried to hold back my laughter, but the night had me giddy, and the thought of Paul being raised in Jersey just pushed me over the edge.

Theo’s face contorted, his mouth pushed out, and his eyes watered until finally, he let loose of a loud, deep belly laugh. “You know, none of the guys ever questioned it,” he laughed.

“Ever?” I asked, tears rolling down my cheeks from laughter.

“No. He came back from the UK talking like that,” he said with a guffaw.

Tears fell from his eyes as he gasped for air. “We all just ignored it, I guess,” Theo laughed so hard he had to lean against the pool table to hold himself from falling to the floor.

“He toured all the places where his favorite punk bands got their starts,” Theo gushed, still trying to talk through the laughter. “Shewee,” he sighed, wiping his cheeks.

“I’m so glad I asked,” I said softly, watching his eyes dance on mine.

“I don’t think I’ve laughed that hard, ever,” he paused, and then reached for my hand.

That familiar electric surge shot through me when his hand touched mine. My eyes dropped from his, staring at his hand as it worked its fingers in between mine.

“So, Lark and all the girls are raving about your images. I can’t wait to show them to you,” I said, changing the subject, and pulling my hand from his to push my blonde hair from my face. It was an obvious pull away, even though I tried to be smooth. I could see the disappointment in his eyes.

“Oh, yeah? What are they raving about?” he asked, the disappointment quickly disappearing.

“About how fun you were, and how good you looked,” I said.

“How good I looked?” he asked, that sexy, crooked smile creeping back onto his face.

“Yes. They were amazed at how photogenic you are,” I replied.

“They are?” he asked, his face pushing closer to mine.

He was close. So close. I could smell the scent of his cologne beneath the layer of sweat from performing on stage all night. Hints of feminine perfumes wafting around the testosterone kept me from leaning in to kiss him. He’s a musician, Willow. They are all the same.

“Yes. They are,” I said, pulling back just slightly to remove some of the temptation.

“They, not you?” he asked.

“No. Me too,” I said quickly.

He inched towards me. His hot breath lingered on my lips. I could taste him, his whiskey drink, and even his spearmint chewing gum. I inhaled, sucking him in, savoring the flavor of his mouth without touching it with my lips.

“You too, what?” he asked softly, inching a bit closer.

“I thought you did amazing,” I whispered.

“Did you think I looked good?” he asked, his voice dripping like honey from his lips onto mine, leaving sweetness sticky on my tongue as I inhaled again, this time deeper, longer.

I expected him to pull back, to tease me, but he didn’t. His eyes locked onto mine. The warmth of his hand pressed against my hip, and then he leaned down, letting our lips meet for the first time.

I melted against him, my mouth clinging to his, my lips parting, my tongue eagerly greeting his as it entered my mouth. I was lost in him.

The weight of his body pushed into me. His hands gripped my hips, turning my back to the pool table. Heat surged through his loins, and then his excitement became evident with hardness against my side.

The struggle between my mind and body for control of the situation was tearing me in two different directions. I’d start to pull away, and then his lips would pull me back in, or his scent, or his touch. I’d get a whiff of the sweet perfume, one that came from his groupies, and I’d pull away again, harder, but his grip on my hips was tight.

He’s your roommate, a bartender, a musician….

He’s so fuckin’ sexy, he tastes so good, and this feels too good to stop….

“We can’t do this,” I said softly, pulling away, this time far enough that he couldn’t pull me back in so easily. His hands were still on my hips, but their grip loosened by our distance.

“Why not?” he asked. His voice was so deep, so husky, that my nipples hardened as the vibrations of it hit my ears.

“We’re roommates,” I hesitated. 

“That’s not it,” he said, tightening his grip, and pulling me back towards him.

I wanted to let him, to get one more taste of his delicious lips, to feel his hard cock pressed against me, warming me, wanting me. “No. It’s only part of it,” I said, refusing to let my body take control.

Theo loosened his grip from my hips and took a step back. His steely blue eyes widened as he spoke. “Then tell me what it is,” he said softly, gently, with sincerity.

“You’re a bartender, a musician. You’re surrounded by women all the time, women who want you, who throw their bodies at you,” I replied as gently as possible.

“I told you, Willow. All musicians aren’t alike. You have to trust me,” he pleaded, his eyes honest and pure. I wanted to trust him. Oh God, how I wanted to trust him.

His lips curled into a smile, that crooked, charming smile I couldn’t resist. “The last sexy guitarist who said that to me ripped my heart out,” I admitted.

I couldn’t stand there, looking at him, having him look at me one moment longer. I knew I’d cave. I walked towards the bathroom, making sure to avoid getting too close to Theo for him to grab me. “You think I’m sexy?” he called out. Oh God!

Chapter Six

It had been over a week since Theo made his move on me, and luckily, we’d both been too busy with work to have too much time alone. He was still flirting every chance he got, but with our schedules out of sync, he was limited to a few comments, a sexy glance, or quick grab at my waist as I left for a shoot.

It was playful, fun, but at the same time, it was nerve-racking. This was my roommate, the man I had to live with, or risk going back to the tiny apartment with three women, cracked paint, no bed, and that smell. No. I couldn’t handle that smell again.

“You need to quit overthinking things,” Lark lectured me as we walked to the bar.

“I can’t,” I groaned.

“This will be the first time we’re out together since last week,” I pointed out.

Lark’s face lit up, her lips puckered, and she wrapped her arms around herself to mimic making out like we were in third grade. I slapped her shoulder playfully, “Stop it.”

“You know you want to. Just do it,” she ordered.

Walking into the bar, I expected to find Theo at a table with his band, playing it cool until I arrived. I didn’t expect to find him behind the bar working.

I hadn’t realized until that moment how much I’d looked forward to hanging out with him. “Why are you working?” I asked, pulling up a barstool on the corner.

“Sal got sick. They didn’t have anyone else that could come in and help,” he moaned, leaning over the bar like he’d been shot.

“Can’t Nancy do it alone?” Lark asked, motioning to the blonde bartender at the other end of the bar.

Theo laughed and then leaned in. “She’s just eye candy. She can’t make a drink to save her life,” he whispered. “I’m sorry, babe. I know you wanted to grind me on the dance floor tonight,” Theo teased, winking in my direction.

Lark giggled, but I quickly jabbed her in the ribs with my elbow to shut her up.

“No. Grinding on the dance floor isn’t my thing,” I smirked.

“But, you do want to grind on me?” he laughed.

I didn’t have a chance to shut him down before he was waved to the other end of the bar by Nancy. I watched him, smiling, laughing, and then taking the time to show her how to make the drink her customer ordered.

She was blonde, attractive, and had boobs as large as Dolly Parton’s. I couldn’t help but wonder if they’d ever hooked up, if they possibly still were hooking up.

A burning sensation settled in the pit of my stomach as I watched them, how she looked at him, how he looked at her. “What’s wrong with you?” Lark asked.

“Nothing,” I lied.

She rolled her eyes. “It’s so obvious you’re hung up on him. I don’t get it.”

The night ended early since Benny and Kayla had big plans early that morning. Planning a wedding was exhausting; at least that’s what Benny told me. “I’m hitching a ride with them,” Lark said, pulling on my arm to come with them.

“I can walk,” I said sternly.

“Take her home. She’s drunk, I don’t need her grinding any of my nice neighbors,” Theo called out with a laugh.

I wasn’t drunk, but I was buzzed. I barely remembered how I got home when I woke up in my bed, still wearing most of my outfit from the night before.

Alcohol oozed from my pores, and my head was throbbing. I made myself get up, grabbed some comfortable ‘day off’ clothes, and headed to the bathroom across the hall.

I noticed Theo’s door was open, so I carefully tiptoed down the hall to peek inside. The bed was a mess, but no more so than usual. No sign of Theo. I left my clothes in the bathroom and checked downstairs. He hadn’t come home.

My desire for a long, hot shower dissolved as my anxiety took over. I washed my hair, my body, and slid a razor across my legs to ensure there was no stubble. Where did he go if he didn’t come home?

I’d managed to towel dry my hair, get dressed in my comfy short-shorts, and was brushing my teeth when I heard the door. I rinsed my mouth, pushed my damp hair from my face, and frantically searched for at least my mascara as footsteps made their way up the staircase. “Good morning,” Theo said, peeking in as I finished applying mascara.

“Good morning,” I said coolly.

“Damn. You’re even sexier wet,” he teased.

I didn’t even turn to look at him. I gathered up my dirty clothes and walked past him to my room.

“Mad isn’t a sexy look for you,” he joked.

I shut my door, sat on the edge of my new bed, and fought back my tears. I was angry, hurt, and confused as to why. I was the one who didn’t want this. But he didn’t know that. He’d flirted with me all week. If he hadn’t worked last night, who knows what would’ve happened?

I decided I was overreacting, and I had no right to be upset, so I moved toward my door, slowly opening it to see if he’d gone downstairs or to his room.

When the door opened, Theo was standing in my doorway, leaning against the frame.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Nothing,” I said quickly, hoping to avoid the conversation I knew was unavoidable.

“Don’t lie to me,” he said, his lips curling into that crooked, sexy smile.

“Did you not come home last night?” I asked, trying to keep my cool.

“Does it matter?” he laughed nervously.

“No. I guess not,” I said, tightening my lips as I tried to force a smile.

“I went to Sal’s to check on him after work. Turns out, the old bastard wasn’t sick, he was having a fuckin’ party,” Theo groaned.

My stomach relaxed, and the lump in my throat started to dissolve. Why did I care so badly about where he was, or who he was with?

“Nancy go, too?” I asked before I could stop myself.

I could hear the cattiness in my voice. It was unattractive, ugly, not me.

Theo laughed. “No. I went alone. I slept on the couch, alone,” he added with a smirk. “Sal did try to snuggle with me at one point, but I told him to go to bed,” he chuckled.

My lips curled into a smile as Theo’s blue eyes pierced into mine. “There’s that smile,” he whispered, moving closer to me.

I couldn’t move. I wasn’t sure I wanted to. His hands gripped my waist, pulling me towards him with a quick rush. “You were jealous,” he teased.

“No. I wasn’t. I was just worried,” I snapped back quickly.

“Worried that I was giving Nancy or some other girl a good grind,” he teased, rocking his hips against my body.

My cheeks burned as I tried to deny the truth. He was right. That was exactly what I was worried about, but I still didn’t know why.

He leaned down, placing his lips as close to mine as possible without touching. His eyes were intoxicating, and I knew he was waiting for me to make the move. “You’re sexy as hell when you’re jealous,” he whispered, his hot breath tickling my lips as he spoke.

Lark’s words—‘quit overthinking it’—played back in my head. I pushed my mouth into his, letting our lips touch for the second time. They were soft, smooth, and tasted like cherry bubble gum.

My knees weakened, pushing my body closer to his as our tongues entangled in a passionate tango. His hands loosened their grip on my hips, sliding to my ass, and then up my sides to under my arms. When his fingers grazed the side of my breast, I moaned unintentionally. The noise of pleasure brought out a new aggression in Theo, one I’d only dreamed about.

His hands pushed under my ass cheeks, lifting me toward him until my legs straddled around his waist. Our mouths never detached, savoring every delicious moment as he carried me to his bedroom.

So many reasons as to why we shouldn’t do this flowed through my head, but I couldn’t stop. I didn’t want to stop.

Our lips suctioned apart as Theo gently tossed me onto his bed. I didn’t have any makeup on, my hair was damp and stringy, but I didn’t care. The way Theo looked at me, I felt beautiful. I was beautiful.

His bed was as soft as I’d imagined, sinking around me like a puffy cloud. Theo’s hands gripped my ankles, tugging me until my ass settled on the very edge of the bed. His hands slid up my legs, opening them as he gently caressed my inner thighs. His fingertips teased my hungry pussy with slight grazes over my thin shorts.

He lowered to his knees, his eyes disappearing between my legs. My ass lifted as his hands pulled at my shorts, leaving me fully exposed, spread open, and more excited than I’d ever been.

My head lifted, staring at the blue eyes that peeked over my thin, perfectly shaved strip. I watched as his finger slid through the curly hairs, and then disappeared between my legs.

I let my head fall back to the mattress as my labia were compromised by his long finger, sliding through my plump skin, teasing my swollen clit, and then sinking into my pussy.

“I’ve wanted you from the moment I laid eyes on you,” he whispered, fucking me slowly with his finger.

My moans grew loud and wildly out of control as he worked his finger faster, and deeper into my body. “Have you wanted this?” he asked softly.

“Yes,” I admitted with a sharp intake of breath.

“You’ve thought about us?” he whispered.

My hips rocked against his hand as another finger slid inside of my aching pussy. I couldn’t get enough. I wanted more. I wanted it all. “Yes,” I gasped.

Warm air teased my clit as Theo blew directly onto my overly sensitive skin. My hips thrust upward from the mattress, pushing my pussy towards his mouth until finally the teasing stopped, and my clit was sucked between his lips.

“Fuck!” I yelled out as my body shook with wild explosions of pleasure.

“Come for me, baby,” he whispered, immediately sucking me back into his warm mouth.

My legs tightened around his head, my hips pushed upward, and my entire body froze in its awkward position before finally releasing my orgasm onto his fingers.

The warmth of his tongue took the place of his fingers as he pulled them from their tight home. I opened my legs wide, loving that he was tasting my sex, loving it, wanting it.

Tingles rolled through my body as Theo stood and leaned over the bed. His hands pushed at my t-shirt until it was over my breasts. His mouth lowered to one, and then the other, taking time to tease each tight nipple with flicks of his tongue.

I watched as he pulled his t-shirt from his body, revealing the washboard abs hidden beneath the cotton material. My hands reached toward him, my fingers gliding over the ripples to enjoy the sensation I’d been so curious to feel.

My eyes locked onto his as he unfastened his belt and jeans. He slid them down his body, kicking them from his feet, and then stroked his hard cock between my open legs while I watched in awe. He was huge.

He pulled a condom from the dresser behind him, slowly sliding it over his thick shaft, making my mouth water, and my pussy twitch.

“Are you ready?” he asked softly.

I wasn’t sure if I was ready for what would happen after. But I knew I was ready for this, right now. I nodded, biting my bottom lip as his large head spread my pussy to new widths. Fuck. Can I even handle this cock?

“I’ll go nice and slow. You can push onto me at your own pace,” he said, like it was normal. Most men aren’t hung like a horse, Theo. What the fuck?

My body took control, leaving all the worries in my mind behind as it pushed downward onto the massive cock. Theo held my thighs, sliding me from the mattress just enough to allow my weight to do most of the work of getting him inside my tight hole.

Our eyes were locked, his filled with concern, and mine probably filled with the ‘oh shit’ look as the weight of my body took me to the root of his enormous penis.

He didn’t move for a moment, and neither did I. My body needed time to adjust to accommodate the larger-than-large cock between my legs. My clit began to throb, sending my pussy into a spasm when he made his first thrust. The feeling of fullness was overwhelming, bringing me to climax before he pushed into me a full three times.

“Oh fuck,” he growled, gripping his hands tightly around my legs. I could feel the pulsating between my legs, my pussy so tight it constricted him to the point he couldn’t hold back.

Theo pushed into me hard, giving me five fast and furious thrusts that brought on another orgasm that synced with his. He fell onto the bed beside me, breathing heavy, smiling and staring into my eyes.

As soon as my body calmed down and the twitching ceased, panic filled my mind. Back to reality.

“You wanna go again?” he asked, his eyes widening with his smile.

Back to heaven. Fuck reality.

Chapter Seven

The band was ecstatic about their new album cover. I’d spent every spare moment editing it to perfection. The lighting was vintage, the fisheye lens provided a cool effect that actually made Paul look taller, and Theo, well, there wasn’t anything I could do to make that man look bad. He was absolutely perfect.

“See, you are photogenic,” I flirted with Theo while the rest of the band focused on their new artwork.

“You’re just an amazing photographer. You can make anyone look good,” he smiled.

Damn. I’ve missed him.

It’d been over a week since we’d hooked up, and with our schedules growing more hectic, I was missing him, badly.

“That’s not true,” I argued, but secretly enjoying the compliment of my work.

“Sure it is. Look at Paul. You managed to actually make him taller,” he laughed.

“That’s the lens we’re using tonight. You still coming?” I asked.

Theo smiled and nodded. “Of course. Can’t let down my fans,” he sighed, rolling his eyes playfully.

The girls at the photography club were certainly fans of Theo’s. I knew the majority of them had developed crushes on him just after that first night, and a couple of them I noticed in the bar on nights he played. It’s just promotion and marketing, Willow. Relax.

I hated that feeling of jealousy I had with Theo, but with the same profession as my ex, and all the same temptations—and then some—it was tough not to worry.

“I’ll have to drive separate,” he said, offering a pouty lip before the guys came back over.

I finally had my schedule cleared for the entire week, and Theo had the night off, and the next day. I could deal with not riding together, knowing that we had an entire evening and an entire day to spend together afterward.

“I’ll see ya there,” I said as casually as I could, and then left for the club.

We hadn’t talked about what we were doing with each other. Hell, we’d barely spoken at all, being so busy. I wasn’t sure what the band members knew, or didn’t know, so I just acted like nothing had changed between us when they were around. It sucked as I walked to my car though, knowing that I couldn’t kiss his lips or touch his warm, hard body before I left.

I wouldn’t be able to at the club, either. We were close professionally, but they weren’t women with which I’d share my personal life. Except for Lark. She knew everything. She was tired of hearing about it.

I pulled into the parking lot wondering what were we doing. Was it just a hookup, or were we exclusive, or were we dating?

My brain took over once again, screwing with everything that felt good, and turning it into a giant mess. I calmed myself down, convincing myself that we’d both been too busy, that’s all.

Still, it was strange sleeping in my bed all week after staying in his. Waking up to his warmth, his scent, his body pressed against mine, it was what I yearned for every night when I fell asleep alone.

You could’ve climbed into his bed, Willow. You were asleep first, in bed before he made it home each night. But he could’ve climbed into mine as well. If he really wanted me, that is.

“Willow!” Jeanette called out, waving from across the parking lot.

I got out of my car and tried to act enthusiastic about seeing her, even though she was my least favorite club member. “Is he coming?” she asked before I could even make it to the sidewalk where she stood.

Her long red hair glistened in the sunlight, making me wonder what I’d look like with that color. Her smile was warm and inviting, but always felt fake to me. I wondered if anyone else thought so.

“Who?” I asked, playing dumb.

“Theo. Is he coming tonight?” she asked eagerly—too eagerly.

“Yes. He’ll be here shortly,” I replied with my own fake smile.

Maybe it was that she was too pretty. She was intimidating with her bright white teeth, perfect figure, and uniquely stunning features.

“What I wouldn’t give for a bite out of that prime rib,” she growled, like, literally growled. Ugh!

“I think he’s seeing someone,” I snapped at her quickly.

“What a shame. Lucky girl, though,” she sighed.

“She sure is,” I replied with another fake smile. What was wrong with me? Was it me, or was it Jeanette? Either way, it always felt like a chore talking to her, one which neither of us appeared to enjoy.

I looked around for Lark, desperately needing one of her pep talks. She was the only one I could even talk to about Theo, and the only one that would tell me to get out of my own head. I needed that right now.

Theo pulled up and immediately Jeanette rushed toward him. I waited on the sidewalk, calling Lark’s number and getting no answer. Where the hell is she?

It pleased me to see Theo look annoyed as he listened to Jeanette rattle beside him on his way through the door. “You coming in?” he asked, almost pleading for help.

“In a minute,” I smiled, hoping to see Lark before the meeting began.

Everyone started to arrive, and of course, Lark was the last one to pull in. I gripped her arm tightly, filled her in on the anxiety I was feeling, and waited for her to tell me I was being foolish.

“You just need to ask him,” she said. What the fuck was that? How was that helpful?

“Don’t you think that might freak him out?” I asked.

“It’s weird that you guys live together. But if you didn’t, would you be this concerned, this quickly?” she asked.

No. I wouldn’t. “So, he could still be dating other women while we’re dating, and living together?” I sighed, realizing just how messed up that truly would be.

“I mean, yeah. I guess. But he wasn’t dating anyone before you, so why would he now?” she asked, wrinkling her nose at me.

A couple of the girls came out, insisting we get inside and get started.

Everything was perfect, especially Theo. He was a natural, and the camera loved him. I noticed Jeanette giving him little glances, and a couple smirks that she appeared to think were hidden from anyone else’s view. It was like they had an inside secret. How long was I outside waiting on Lark?

At the end of the night, I noticed a bracket was missing from my lens mount. I knelt down on the floor, searching for the small black piece on the dark carpet when Theo snuck up behind me. “What did you lose?” he asked.

As I explained to him what the part looked like, Jeanette was already on his tail. “Oh no,” she exclaimed, even that appeared fake.

After searching for several minutes, I decided it wasn’t worth it. “It’s not that expensive. I’ll just order a new one,” I said, calling off the search.

I’d had enough time on the floor with Jeanette and her fake expressions. I didn’t care if it was a thousand dollars to replace; it would be worth it to escape from her.

Jeanette pulled Theo away as soon as the hunt was over, showing him the photos she’d taken of him the last time he’d modeled.

Watching the two of them together, smiling, leaning over one another’s shoulders, it was disgusting.

Lark had a client meeting, so she was already gone, leaving me to deal with my irrational feelings alone. When I watched Jeanette whisper something in Theo’s ear, tiptoeing to reach it, I was filled with jealousy. When she handed him a white piece of torn paper, most likely her number, I was filled with rage. But, when Theo put that paper into his back pocket, giving the room a once-over to make sure he wasn’t seen, I was filled with heartache. It was a familiar feeling, one I’d never wanted to feel again.

Jeanette left, waving at me from the door. My hand barely hit the air for her weak goodbye wave. That bitch!

I was an idiot. Why did I believe he’d be any different? He wasn’t going to commit, not when he had so many women fawning over him everywhere he went.

Theo stacked the chairs, and folded the tables, pushing them against the wall while I packed up my equipment. “You ready?” he asked, a smile wide on his face. Yeah, you have plenty to be happy about, don’t you, playboy?

My stomach churned at the thought of Theo having his way with me tonight, only to have his way with Jeanette tomorrow night, and whoever else the night after that. “Yeah,” I snipped, my tone short and cold.

If he flinched at my screech, I hadn’t noticed. I tossed my bag over my shoulder and headed for the door. I held it open while he walked out, and then locked up without saying a word.

“I’ll follow you home. Unless you want to stop somewhere?” he suggested as we walked to our cars.

“There’s nowhere else I need or want to be. If you have somewhere in mind, or someone, don’t let me stop you. No need for any favors,” I tightened my lips and squinted my eyes.

“Whoa,” he gasped, backing up a step as I climbed into my car. “What the hell is wrong with you?” he asked.

“I saw Jeanette throwing herself at you, and you loving every second of it. You have her number in your back pocket. Why don’t you just call her? She obviously doesn’t mind sharing,” I snapped, slamming my car door.

“Wow. You’re a nut case, Willow,” he said with surprise.

“You’re right. I am nuts for believing you’d be any different. I told you, all musicians are the same,” I scolded.

“I’ll see you at home,” Theo said, shaking his head as he walked away from my car.

Mac had the same way of making me feel like the crazy one when he fucked me over. Not this time. He may not have been caught with a pair of red lips around his cock, but given time, he would’ve been. They’re all the same.

Chapter Eight

I kept checking my rearview mirror for Theo, but he wasn’t behind me. My heart felt heavy in my chest as I pulled into the parking spot in front of his house, our house. His car wasn’t there.

A cold shower cooled me off a little and left me with a clear mind. This feeling I got in the pit of my stomach with Theo was the same one I’d gotten with Mac towards the end. I wasn’t sure that it’d ever go away, or that I’d ever trust him. Lark was right: if we weren’t living together, I wouldn’t be pushing for a label on our relationship this soon. And, if we weren’t living together, I’d never have gotten close enough to him to develop feelings. He would’ve been left on stage for his groupies to fight over.

Lark answered after three rings. “Are you done with your meeting?” I asked.

“Yes. On my way home now; what’s up?” she asked.

I hesitated, partly to figure out what to say, and partly to fight back my tears. “It’s Theo,” I finally gasped.

“What happened?” she asked with concern.

I told her the whole story, from front to back. She didn’t offer any advice while I spoke, letting me get everything off my chest first, which I appreciated. “Willow, what if he was just being polite after being put on the spot and took the number?” she asked.

“If he didn’t want to tell her he had a girlfriend, or that he’s seeing someone, then he doesn’t, he isn’t,” I scoffed.

“I get that. But, these are your friends. Have you told Benny, Samson, or Paul about you two?” she asked.

“No,” I admitted, feeling that burning in my stomach return.

“He may have told you about it later and let you handle it how you wanted,” she advised, making me feel even worse.

I sighed, taking in everything she said, and trying to put myself in his shoes. “No. If one of his buddies came onto me, I would at the very least say I was seeing someone, period,” I insisted.

Lark was a hopeless romantic, but I was a realist. There was no gray area to this topic. It was black or white, right or wrong.

“What are you gonna do about your living situation?” she asked.

The burning pit in my stomach grew like a forest fire after a long, hot summer drought. “I guess I’ll talk to him. If having sex is a stipulation for living here, then I’ll move,” I said sternly.

I didn’t want to move. The thought of moving made me ill. But, the thought of staying, and not being with Theo, that made me ill, too.

“Can you handle that?” Lark asked.

I couldn’t. I knew that, and she knew that.

“It doesn’t matter. If he’ll let me stay, I’ll have to try,” I sighed.

My phone beeped with a call from an unknown number. “I’m getting a call,” I told Lark, quickly saying our goodbyes.

I clicked over to the waiting call. “Hello?”

“Is this Willow Banks?” a woman asked.

“Yes, it is. How can I help you?” I asked.

“We’re having a family reunion in the Hamptons with everyone arriving tomorrow morning and staying for two days. I realize this is short notice, but our photographer canceled last minute and a mutual friend gave me your number,” she explained.

“Would you need me there for the entire three days?” I asked.

It was an unusual request, but not unheard of. People with money found millions of ways to squander it, including hiring a professional to photograph their day at the zoo. “Yes. There are six generations, all showing up this year. I’m afraid for the oldest generation it will likely be their last trip. We just thought it would be special to have those precious last moments together memorialized in photos that we could all share,” she said.

The thought of leaving without talking to Theo both upset me and gave me pleasure. Let him suffer, wondering where I’m at. But, then again, he may decide to throw me out while I’m gone.

I needed time to think, regardless. And after our spat, we both could use some time apart. “Yes. I’d be delighted to do it,” I agreed.

We worked out the details with payment, accommodations, and transportation, and then hung up. I was to leave early tomorrow morning with a car service picking me up to deliver me by nine.

I called Lark back, told her about the job, and she agreed that time apart might do us both some good. She was still hopeful this would all work out, but I was done. I couldn’t continue to torture myself any longer.

Every car door, every set of headlights, brought me to the window looking for Theo. Each time, it wasn’t him.

It was getting late, and I’d convinced myself he was out with someone else, probably Jeanette. I had given up hope of seeing him before I left at six in the morning for the Hamptons when the doorbell rang.

I’d been there a month, and it was the first time I’d heard the customized ‘Stairway to Heaven’ tone from inside the house. It may be the last, Willow.

I opened the door to find Benny on my stoop with an obviously drunk Theo leaning against the red brick entrance. “I’m sorry, Willow. I don’t know what’s going on, but he just kept saying you told him not to come home,” Benny explained, helping Theo inside.

Theo grinned when our eyes met, a vindictive grin, not one I’d consider friendly. “You need a shower, man,” Benny said, offering me an apologetic glance before helping Theo up the stairs.

I heard the water running, and bottles falling from the shelves to the shower floor. After a few minutes, the water stopped, and I could hear voices coming from the top of the stairs. I felt helpless down there while Benny helped Theo. I hated to see him in that shape, and even though I was still angry, I ached for his pain to go away.

Benny came downstairs after about thirty minutes. “Wow. I haven’t seen him that drunk since his twenty-first birthday,” he sighed, falling onto the couch beside me. “What happened between you two?” he asked.

“We’ve been—uh….” I stammered.

“I know. That’s all he’s talked about,” Benny laughed.

I was surprised that he knew, and that Theo had talked about it, about us. “I’ve been burned by his type before,” I said quickly.

“His type?” he asked, his eyebrows lifting high on his forehead.

I swallowed hard, realizing the type was musicians, and Benny was one as well. One that was about to be married.

“I’m sorry. I don’t mean any disrespect to you or Kayla. It’s just, Theo has a lot of temptations surrounding him, and I worried he couldn’t handle them. Today, I witnessed that he couldn’t,” I explained.

Benny looked surprised, his eyebrows still lifted high on his face, and his eyes widened. “Wow. That surprises even me. I’ve known Theo a long time, and that’s just not his style. Are you sure you saw what you saw?” he asked.

I forced a smile. “I saw what I saw.”

It was too familiar. Mac with his pants undone, a brunette on her knees when I caught him backstage after a gig; it was the same thing. “It’s not what it looks like, baby,” Mac said. Ugh. I was over having a man tell me I was crazy, that I didn’t see what I knew I saw.

“Well, maybe talk to him and work it out. Like I said, I’ve known Theo for a long time. He’s a good guy, one of the last good ones. Give him a chance to explain, at least. He’s been so happy. It just blows my mind that he’d do anything to destroy that,” Benny said softly, standing from the couch.

He opened his arms and gave me a big hug. “Talk to him, before it gets out of hand,” he suggested.

“I have to go out of town in the morning for work. I’ll be gone a few days,” I said, concerned now that maybe I hadn’t seen what I thought I saw. No. Don’t get sucked in, Willow. But Benny was right. I did need to talk to Theo.

“Well. He’s pretty drunk now. Maybe you’ll have time in the morning,” he said, giving me a quick hug before heading out the door.

I turned off all the lights and headed upstairs. It was late, and I had to be up early, but if Theo was awake, I’d at least let him know my plans.

Upstairs, Theo’s loud snores echoed down the halls. I peeked in his room, finding him lying on his back wearing only a pair of basketball shorts and his hair still wet from the shower.

His abs rippled down his chest like a beautiful ocean tide that I wanted to swim in. My heart fluttered as I stared at the man I’d fallen for, and the one who had made me fall for his lies.

A part of me still wanted to crawl into bed with him, to curl up and feel his warmth. I walked into the room quietly, pulled the blankets over Theo, and fought the urge to lean in and give him a kiss on those perfect lips.

I started to walk away when a grip tightened around my wrist, pulling me back towards the bed. “I love you,” Theo mumbled, his eyes barely open.

My heart ached, wanting to fall into his arms. His eyes fell closed again, and the snores continued.

Chapter Nine

My eyes were itchy and red. I hadn’t had much sleep after packing, and then writing, and rewriting Theo’s note several times.

I glanced into his room, setting my suitcase by the door. He was still snoring. I tiptoed into the room, placed the note on his nightstand, and took one last look at his beautiful face. It’s no wonder I’d fallen for him. He was gorgeous.

The driver was chatty, something I wasn’t ready for so early in the morning. I made an excuse that I had to work while we drove and settled into the backseat of the black Escalade with my tablet, playing Farmville instead of actually working.

The Hamptons were beautiful when we arrived a couple hours later. Traffic wasn’t bad, since it was still early in the year. Most New Yorkers didn’t flock to the area until the summer heat became unbearable in the city.

I settled into my hotel, contacted my client, and made arrangements to meet them at their beach house in an hour after freshening up.

It was late enough that Theo would be awake, and he would’ve already seen my note. I couldn’t help but wonder what was going through his mind. Did he even care that I was gone?

I called Lark, gave her the update on my whereabouts, and asked her to keep an eye on Theo while I was gone. I wanted to make sure he was okay. “You’re in love with him,” she said softly.

“No. I care about him. It doesn’t matter, anyway. Just please make sure he’s okay,” I scoffed, hanging up after she promised.

Love. Did I love Theo? My heart knew the answer to that, but my mind wouldn’t allow me to say it aloud, or even admit it silently.

A driver waited for me outside my hotel to bring me to the beach house where I’d photograph six generations enjoying a holiday while my heart broke in two. I’d keep a smile on my face, be kind, and remain professional, even though I wanted to curl up in bed with chick flicks and eat ice cream from the carton for the next two days.

My phone rang as I frantically searched for it in my bag. Assuming it was the client assuring I was on schedule, I slid answer without even looking at the number.

“Where are you?” Theo’s voice sounded irritable and scratchy.

“I left a note,” I said quickly, surprised to hear his voice.

“Yeah. So, you’re really in the Hamptons on work?” he asked.

“Yes. I received the call last night. After what happened between us, I figured it was best to create some distance,” I sighed, struggling to keep my tears from flooding my eyes.

“I thought you just took off because of me,” he grumbled.

It was partly because of him, that was true. It was a great opportunity, but I was looking so forward to our night and our entire day together. I would’ve turned it down in a heartbeat if things hadn’t ended as they did.

“I’m sorry things turned out the way they did, Theo. I will look for a place when I get back,” I said.

“You’re moving out?” he asked, his voice sounding angry.

“It’s for the best. I don’t think we can go back to being just roommates. It’s not fair to either of us,” I explained.

“Where are you staying?” he asked.

I hesitated.

“In case I need you for something, or need to get in touch with you,” he added quickly.

I gave him the information and told him I had to go. I wiped my eyes, worked my features into a friendly smile, and stepped out of the car to meet the family I’d be spending my next three days with.

Everyone was gracious, especially Elizabeth Channing, the woman I’d spoken with on the phone. I spent the next couple hours meeting family members as they arrived, taking note of their names, and trying to find ways to put a name with each face to make it easy to remember. There were over ninety people that arrived that day, including the kids, all staying in adjacent beach houses. It was going to be a lot of work. More than I’d realized when I’d agreed to take this on.

It would be good to keep my mind off Theo. At least I’d be staying busy.

Mrs. Channing offered for me to stay for dinner, but it felt awkward to be an outsider in such a large family. “Thank you, but I’d like to organize the photos I’ve taken,” I excused myself until morning.

Once I returned to the hotel, I drew a hot bath, pouring the complimentary bubble bath into the water. Even though I’d stayed busy all day with the droves of people to meet, scenes to photograph, and stories to listen to, Theo still managed to enter my mind quite a bit.

The hot water soothed my aches, all but the one in my heart. Every time I closed my eyes, leaning back into the water to relax, I saw Theo. His body, so toned and muscular, lying on the bed uncovered before I’d left that morning. I could hear his voice, the anger and irritation within it from when he called. I don’t know why, but it bothered me that he didn’t ask me to stay when I said I’d look for a place. Did I want him to beg me to stay? If he did, would I?

I’d wanted a nap after my long bath, but I knew closing my eyes would only bring more memories of Theo, more pain. I might as well get some work done.

I slipped out of the water, the cool air of the hotel room instantly sending goosebumps to my skin. I wrapped myself in the hotel robe, plush, white, and warm. My eyes were adorned with black circles under them as I passed by the mirror. Ugh. I looked ten years older than twenty-three.

A knock on the door startled me. I tiptoed to the door, peeking through the peephole, but whoever was there was too close to make out. I slid the chain across the door to lock it before opening it to see who knocked. Probably someone who had the wrong room.

“Theo?” I asked as he turned to show his face.

He looked like shit. His hair was messy, something I’d only seen early in the mornings, and he had the same dark circles under his eyes as I did.

“I need to talk to you,” he said urgently.

I pushed the door closed, unclasped the chain, and opened it back up to let him inside.

“What are you doing here?” I asked him, still confused by his presence.

“I told you. I need to talk to you,” he said with the same irritation in his voice from earlier.

“You need to leave,” I stammered.

“No. You need to listen,” he said, his tone strong and growing angry.

I was shocked by his aggression, rendered speechless as I stood, still dripping under my robe before him.

“You have some serious trust issues. I know that, you know that, but you need to get the hell over them,” he said. “You can trust me, and you need to trust me, because I’m not willing to give up on us yet,” he added.

“I can trust that you’ll cheat. I watched you take that number and put it in your pocket,” I snipped.

His face tightened, and my eyes caught the hard swallow as his Adam’s apple rolled up, and then back down his neck. Theo’s eyes narrowed as he bit his bottom lip, letting out a soft laugh, almost like a growl.

“You’ve pushed me away at every turn. You’re stubborn, critical, and a real pain in my ass, ya know that? But I still want you. Why? I have no freakin’ idea, but I do, Willow,” he said, his voice cracking as he spoke.

“I love you, Willow,” he said softly.

My heart ached to say it back. I love you, Theo Carson. I love you with everything I have to give. But I don’t trust you with my love.

“If you don’t love me, that’s one thing. I’ll have to live with that. But if you do, and this is just you comparing me to your asshole ex, or you pushing me away because you’re afraid of getting hurt, I can’t live with that,” he said.

“I saw you, Theo. This isn’t me comparing you. This isn’t me being afraid. This is me telling you that I don’t want another cheater in my life. My heart can’t handle that pain again,” I replied, fighting back the tears already forming in my eyes. “You need to leave, Theo,” I said softly.

Chapter Ten

Theo stood there, staring at me, not budging. My body trembled as I fought to control my pain, my love, my regret. I needed him to walk away, to leave, so I could let myself fall to the floor. If he stood there much longer my, legs would give out. Please don’t let him see me drop to my knees in pain.

“Do you love me, Willow?” he asked, his voice soft and velvety.

My bottom lip trembled as I dug my long nails into my palm to keep my tears from flowing. Too late.

He moved towards me, his arms reaching around me, but he didn’t pull me into his chest where I wanted to be, where I felt safe and warm. His hands rested on my shoulders. They started to shake. His eyes pierced into mine—so blue, so sexy. My tears fell down my cheeks, leaving hot streaks on my skin. “Tell me you don’t love me, and I’ll leave,” he whispered.

I couldn’t.

“I do love you,” I gently sobbed.

His eyes lit up like I’d just given him the best news he’d ever had. It still didn’t mean we had a chance, that I was willing to overlook his shortcomings.

He let his hands fall from my shoulders; one reached behind him, pulling a small baggy from his back pocket. “Here,” he said, handing it to me.

I took it, looking into the clear bag with confusion. “Is this the bracket I lost?” I asked.

He nodded.

“How did you even know what to buy?” I asked, still confused by the gift.

He reached back behind him, pulling a white piece of paper from his back pocket. “This is how,” he said, pushing the familiar paper in my direction.

I looked at the paper that I thought stored Jeanette’s phone number, but instead contained a part number for what I held in my other hand.

He moved towards me, so close I could feel the heat from his body. “You need to trust me,” he said sternly.

I couldn’t speak. I felt like an idiot. I was devastated and elated at the same time. He wasn’t a cheat. He was only getting information from her to replace my lost lens bracket.

Theo’s eyes burned into my soul as they pierced it with a passion I’d never seen. His hands gripped the belt of my robe, tugging it until it slid through the loops, and my robe fell open.

My breathing was rapid, my heart racing, and my pussy was already throbbing in anticipation of what was to come. He let his hands slide around my waist, pulling me into him with a quick thrust. “Promise me,” he whispered as he slid to his knees.

His hot breath surrounded my pussy as he took me in with his eyes. “Promise you what?” I gasped, willing to promise anything at that moment.

“Promise me that you’ll always trust me,” he said, looking up at me with honest, beautiful blue eyes.

“I promise,” I said, believing that I would trust Theo from now on. He wasn’t Mac. “I love you,” I muttered as Theo pushed open my legs, burying his tongue deep in my wet hole.

I cried out with pleasure as he sucked my clit, rolling his tongue over my sensitive pearl and bringing me so close to orgasm I had to pull him away before my legs gave out.

His grin was delicious, knowing he was bringing me so close to climax with just a few flicks of his tongue. He slithered up my body, sliding the robe from my shoulders and onto the floor. His eyes glowed a shade of blue I’d only seen when he was on stage, and then his mouth pushed into mine.

I could taste my juices on his tongue as it entangled mine. His hands roamed my body, stopping on my ass cheeks and lifting me from my tip-toed feet. He lifted me up, my legs wrapping around his waist, letting my pussy glide across the hard cock lying beneath the scratchy denim of his jeans.

I fell onto the bed as he let me go, my body bouncing gently on the mattress before finding its place to settle. Theo reached towards me, placing his hands on my knees. My legs were together, hiding what he’d just tasted from his view, and it was obvious he wasn’t pleased by the tilt of his head and the look in his eyes.

He pushed my legs apart, revealing the sweet pink flesh he craved. My nipples tightened as he smiled with satisfaction at the sight.

His hands worked quickly to slide his t-shirt from his beautiful abs and undo his jeans to reveal the hard cock pressed uncomfortably against the denim.

My eyes took him in, loving everything about him, every curve, every ripple, every delicious inch of the meat hanging between his muscular thighs.

He slid onto the bed, pushing me towards the headboard with his hand under my ass. Our lips met with a passionate kiss, sending tingles through my entire body. Fingers playfully pushed my labia open, and then tickled my opening until I squirmed.

A foil package crinkled in Theo’s left hand as he worked to open it. His mouth sucked my nipples, one at a time, with quick suction and a gentle graze of his teeth that made me squeal with delight.

He lifted his weight from me to slide on the condom, and then pressed his hard cock between my legs.

I gasped as he entered me, slowly at first. My body still wasn’t used to the enormous size of his manhood, rendering me unable to move or rock my hips against him until I adjusted.

He slid in deeper, causing me to moan. My hips ached to move, but they didn’t dare, knowing he’d take it slow, and be gentle.

I throbbed against him, my pussy already teased and close to orgasm. “Come for me,” he whispered, pushing into me deeper.

My body was pinned to the mattress by his hard cock, throbbing, shaking, and loving every second of the sensations that exploded through me.

“Oh, fuck,” he gasped, beginning to thrust in and out slowly.

My orgasm lubricated his large muscle, allowing him to glide easily in and out of my still-throbbing cunt. His thrusts grew faster, harder, and my moans grew louder and deeper.

His hands slid underneath me, pushing my ass towards him, and him deeper into my body. Our mouths locked together, our tongues entangled, and he rolled me to my side.

I pushed him over to his back, taking my position on top. My hips spread wide open as the weight of my body pushed him deep inside me. The look in his eyes as his hands cupped my breasts brought me closer to another orgasm.

I rocked my hips against him, grinding my clit into his rippled abs for friction. Moans filled the room, my head grew dizzy, and my bottom lip trembled from the sheer pleasure erupting between my legs.

Theo’s hands slid down my sides, stopping at my hips. He pushed me back against his long shaft, and then pulled me forcefully back towards him, in long, hard thrusts. His cock grew, filling me as it began to pulsate and twitch between my legs,

His body tensed, his grip tightened around my hips, and the thrusting stopped as we both exploded onto one another in sweet ecstasy.

I didn’t move. I couldn’t move. My breathing was starting to calm, and my heart rate slowing back to normal as my eyes opened, and looked down to his. “I love you, Willow,” he whispered.

“I love you too, Theo,” I gasped.

Epilogue

The crowd at the coliseum was going wild as Lion’s Den took the stage. They were opening for Twenty-One Pilots, a dream Theo’d had for years. I pushed through the crowd to the front of the stage, holding my camera steady for some action shots. I planned to use the photos for their new album cover, their third album.

The band had really taken off, and I couldn’t’ve been happier for Theo.

The opening song was one Theo had written for me. It was sweet, sexy, and described our relationship perfectly. He really did have talent.

When they were on their last song, I snuck around the stage and to the back where Lark and the other band member’s wives all cheered as they watched the show. Bobby, Lark’s new husband, gripped her tightly around her waist as he swayed against her back to the beat of the music. I couldn’t believe they’d only met a year ago and were already married.

Kayla, Benny’s wife, was sporting a very obvious baby bump, and their third anniversary was coming up later that month. I was happy in my relationship with Theo, but I was beginning to worry it was growing stagnant, not moving forward like it should. Everyone else seemed to be moving on. I felt left behind, stuck.

I knew Theo loved me, and I loved him. But, we were still in that townhouse, even though he talked about selling to find a bigger place all the time. We’d never talked about marriage, or kids. Maybe that wasn’t what he wanted.

My camera aimed at Theo, taking a shot of him exiting the stage. His eyes were wild, filled with excitement, and focused on only me. Damn, I loved that man.

My photography business had really taken off, too, so we both had plenty to be thankful for. The rest, the things that kept me up at night, like a new house, marriage, kids, those would come. I was sure of it. Someday.

“Man, I hope you got some good shots,” Benny roared as he ran from the stage. He rubbed Kayla’s belly, leaning down to kiss it before giving her a kiss on the cheek.

Sal was so excited he was shaking, and Paul, well, he was only interested in grabbing a passionate kiss from his new wife, Selina.

“This has been an amazing night,” Theo said, his eyes still dancing as the crowd screamed for more.

“You finally got everything you always wanted,” I smiled, loving the fact his dreams were all coming true.

“Almost everything,” he said gently as he lowered to one knee in front of me.

My heart raced as he pulled a ring box from his pocket, opening it to reveal the most beautiful diamond I’d ever seen.

“Willow. Knowing you trust me, that you love me, it’s made me a better man. You’ve given me the motivation I needed to reach my highest goals, and with you by my side, I know now there’s no goal too high to reach. None of this means a damn thing without you. Please do me the honor of becoming my wife, sharing in this beautiful life with me, until death do us part,” he said, his voice choking as his eyes welled up.

“Yes!” I exclaimed, gripping him tightly and pulling him to his feet.

He lifted me from the ground, swinging me around as our lips met. I couldn’t imagine a better way to end the night—and to start my life.

“You better get out there,” I whispered, motioning to the stage. The crowd was wild, wanting an encore, so Theo let me go, but quickly turned back for another kiss before following the guys on stage for one last song. “I love you, Willow,” he shouted.

“I love you too!” I called back over the crowd.

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MR PRESIDENT

By Ivy Jordan

This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places and incidents are products of the writer's imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locales or organizations is entirely coincidental.

Copyright © 2017 Ivy Jordan

 Chapter One

The small Minnesota office was crowded with campaign staff, supporters, and the hopeful presidential candidate, Adam Andrews, current governor of the state.

He looked so confident, so calm. I was falling apart inside, my nerves beginning to get the better of me as the reporter updated the race. One by one, Adam was winning the major states, and it was looking like a clear victory.

“Another glass of wine?” Adam whispered in my ear.

His hot breath startled me as it rolled down my neck from behind. “Yes, please,” I smiled, trying to hide my nerves as he handed me the glass of chardonnay. “It’s looking good,” I said, staring up at the large television hanging on the desolate blue wall.

I wondered what this office would be once we cleared out, what it was before we arrived. “I’m a mess,” he admitted, still with confidence that made him unbelievable.

I chuckled. “You look fine to me.”

His smile was wide and inviting, contagious, and nearly intoxicating. “I hide my stress well,” he sighed.

Unlike me, I thought to myself. The soft blue eyes he laid upon me made it clear he thought I needed some assurance.

Adam, 49 years old, a veteran that served in the U.S Air Force, ranked Chief Master Sergeant, was twenty years younger than his presidential rival, Grant Owens, a loud cowboy with outdated views and unorganized thoughts.

Adam was a Democrat, and everyone said our country was in need of a party change. I agreed, and strongly believed in everything Adam stood for and behind.

“What are your plans when this is all over?” he asked, staring directly at me instead of the television that held his fate.

“I guess I’ll go back to the paper,” I smiled, unsure if that was what I truly wanted.

“Ah, yes. You were a force to be reckoned with there. I’m sure they’ll be happy to have you back,” he stated, his eyes shifting from mine to the screen above.

I hated to admit I had a crush on him, one that would somehow be amplified if he was truly going to be our president.

The reporter soon announced Adam Andrews the winner without the final states being calculated. There was no way Owens could win, even with the remaining states. That was it. I was standing next to the next President of the United States.

The entire office cheered, letting off confetti bombs into the air as their yells of victory flooded the room. “Congratulations,” I shouted over the noise.

He sipped his wine, smiled, and then set his glass down on the table behind us. I watched as he took center room, commanding authority effortlessly, and exuding confidence that was more than strong: it was sexy.

I gulped my wine, emptying my glass as he thanked everyone for their support. My moment of excitement and happiness was quickly glazed over with sorrow, realizing I would no longer be spending long hours by his side.

My desk was cluttered with campaign materials and only one small picture frame. I picked it up, staring at the woman inside the tiny frame, her head bald, her eyes worn and tired, and her smile, faded, but present. Rowena Hamilton, my older sister, and one of the strongest women I knew, or had ever known. Only a few years older than myself, she’d carved herself an important editorial position at a prestigious paper in Washington D.C, raised twin boys, both in medical school, and survived cancer.

She hated that I gave up my position as a journalist to run Adam’s campaign. She had pushed me my entire life to chase my dreams, and she didn’t believe Adam had a chance in hell against the quick-talking cowboy he was up against. Rowena was wrong for once, a revelation that both shocked and pleased me.

There wasn’t much else on or in my desk I needed to gather, just a few notebooks with my campaign strategies scribbled inside, and a picture taken with Adam at one of the rallies.

I shoved the small picture frame and notebooks into my purse and then held the picture of Adam and myself between my fingers. In it, he wore the blue polo that I encouraged him to wear. It brought out the blue in his eyes and made him impossible to ignore. He was casual and relaxed that day, and when the picture was taken, his hand was resting on my lower back. I could still feel the sensation of my weakened knees, tightened breasts, and speeding heart from his touch.

“That was a great day,” Adam’s voice sounded from behind.

I turned, blushing and nervous from his closeness. “Yes, it certainly was,” I admitted.

“That was all thanks to you. In fact, I don’t think I’d have gotten here if it weren’t for you,” he grinned.

“No. You got yourself here. You deserve it,” I replied.

“I’m serious, Quinn. From telling me what to wear, what to say, and even how to run my campaign, you’ve been amazing,” he said.

“Thank you. Those are very kind words,” I blushed.

“Any chance you’d consider moving to Washington, D.C.?” he asked.

My heart raced. I loved the idea of continuing to work with Adam. He was a1 brilliant, charming, and intelligent man, who just happened to make my pussy swell whenever he was near.

“It’s just the power.” I could still hear my sister’s words echoing through my brain.

She knew of my crush, but I’d sworn her to secrecy. I’d had a crush on Adam since I was just a girl, barely hitting puberty. He was my first crush, the first boy—well, man—that had made my heart flutter and gave my skin goose pimples when he was near. Rowena argued that also had only to do with power. Adam was twenty-four, home from the Air Force and wearing that beautiful blue uniform that brought out the kindness in his eyes. I was just twelve, no breasts, braces, and no hopes of gaining his attention as he sat at our dinner table, brought home on leave by my brother Garrett who’d become his best friend while serving our country.

Garrett never came home again after that, but Adam remained close with our family, having none of his own.

“Is that a no?” he chuckled.

I pulled out of my memories, my daydreams, and the struggle within my brain that told me all the reasons I should say no. I was a journalist, not a politician, even though the rush of power had flooded through my veins like heroin these last few months. “No. I’d love that. But I’m sure there are more qualified people in line,” I said graciously.

“I need people around me I can trust. I need people who aren’t afraid to tell me when I’m wrong,” he smiled.

My cheeks burned as his eyes pierced into me with a wild amusement. Yes, that was me, the one who liked to point it out when Adam Andrews was wrong. I felt foolish now, realizing this was my president, the president of the United States—POTUS, as us journalists liked to say for short.

“I’m sorry I’ve been so pushy,” I sighed.

He laughed. It wasn’t a heavy or deep laugh, but a soft, light, and free laugh. It calmed me just to hear it, similar to the ocean gently slapping the shore. “You pushed me all the way to the White House,” he smiled. “Just give it some thought,” he said just as someone pulled him away for an interview.

It was late, we’d all been drinking wine and champagne, and the giddiness of the lack of sleep, stress, and the excitement of the moment had him saying things he probably didn’t mean. I mean, seriously. Me, in the White House?

I shoved the picture still gripped tightly in my fingers into my purse, carefully placing it between the notebooks, so as to avoid it being bent.

“I’ll drive you home,” offered Sal, one of the faithful campaigners, as I walked toward the door.

I’d planned on calling an Uber, but knew at this hour I’d have a decent wait for it to arrive. I was exhausted, and all I wanted to do was climb into bed. “That’d be great. Thanks, Sal,” I accepted.

Sal opened the passenger door to an older Camry, quickly pushing in front of me to sweep the pile of papers from the front seat onto the floor. The car was filled with fast food bags, campaign buttons, and loads of papers. It looked like my life felt in that very moment: messy, neglected, and overwhelming.

“Sorry for the mess,” he apologized, starting up the car and adjusting the heat buttons.

“It’s okay. We’ve all been busy,” I laughed nervously, realizing that was true. We all had been busy, and tomorrow, there was nothing to do.

“So, what are your plans now?” he asked.

I looked over at him as he pulled the car away from the curb. His thick glasses made a glare when the street light shone through the windshield, making his bright green eyes almost disappear. I realized I’d worked side-by-side with this man for months, yet knew nothing about him.

“I’ll probably get my job back at the paper. What about you?” I asked, curious about this kind soul who’d spent weeks of his life to help Adam, gaining nothing in return, except maybe the satisfaction that he’d helped put his president-elect into office.

“I’ll probably just start writing again,” he said calmly.

“You’re a writer?” I asked, hoping the surprise in my voice wasn’t offensive.

“Yes. Political views mostly. ‘Donkeys have worked their asses off for over five-thousand years, while elephants have played in the circus,’” he said, reciting the passage of a book I’d read.

“You wrote that?” I asked, even more surprised.

He grinned proudly. It was a good book, at least what I’d read. It was a very unique view on the history of the Democrats and Republicans. “You’ve written several autobiographies of past presidents,” I pointed out, as if he didn’t know.

“Unauthorized versions, but yes,” he agreed. “I’m actually surprised you weren’t asked to join President Andrews in Washington, D.C. Damn, that’s the first time I’ve said that aloud: President Andrews,” he said with a chuckle.

It was strange to hear, but the part he said prior to that was even stranger. “Why would you think that?” I asked.

“You two were pretty close. He seemed to rely on you for direction,” he stated.

“I’ve known Adam—err, President Andrews—for years,” I said, unsure why I was becoming defensive.

“That explains a lot,” he said.

“What do you mean?” I asked carefully.

“Well, just the way you two interacted with one another. There was certainly something there, a connection, an attraction. I actually thought it was romantic, but if you’ve known each other that long, that makes sense,” he explained.

“He was in the Air Force with my brother. He became a close friend of the family before my brother passed away, and he’s just always been there,” I explained.

I wasn’t sure why it made me so uneasy that Sal had noticed something between Adam and me, maybe for the fear it was more than just a closeness shared between two friends. I’d yearned for something romantic to blossom between us during the last few months. What if others noticed my feelings, or worse, what if Adam had?

Sal pulled up in front of my apartment building as I directed him. “I guess this is it,” I said sadly, not so much because I wouldn’t see Sal again, but because I might not see Adam for a long while.

“Look for my new book. I plan to write about the campaign trail,” he smiled.

That explained the loads of papers scribbled on and floating throughout his car.

“Will do, Sal. Thanks for the ride,” I said, sliding from the car and shutting the door.

What if he wrote about what he thought were romantic vibes between Adam and me?

Chapter Two

Adam stood proudly in front of the podium as he unleashed his first speech as POTUS. It was two in the afternoon, but I was still wearing my sleep pants, and the only thing I’d eaten was a pint of cherry ice cream.

It was strange watching Adam, now the president, from my couch. I was used to being by his side, guiding him on what to say, and how to say it. I wondered who was doing that now as I stared at the light-green dress shirt that washed away his baby blues, and the perfectly pressed handkerchief in his jacket pocket that made him look like he was on his way to church.

His words were from the heart, and as I listened to them, it was clear he’d insisted on writing them himself. I’d read enough of his raw, unedited speeches and corrected them to realize he hadn’t hired anyone, or allowed anyone to take my place.

My phone rang with a strange number from the 202 area code: Washington, D.C. I gripped the phone in my hand so tightly it hurt. My heart raced as I quickly slid my thumb across the answer button before it stopped. “Hello?” I answered, sounding so unprofessional it made me cringe.

“Quinn Hamilton, please,” the female voice requested with a coldness that made me shudder.

“This is she,” I said quickly.

“President Andrews has requested your presence at the White House after his inauguration,” the cold voice ordered.

I was stunned. Maybe he hadn’t been just being nice or allowing the alcohol and adrenaline1 to say things he didn’t mean that night.

“May I ask what this is about?” I questioned.

“President Andrews will have the details,” she snapped. “A car will be sent for you Monday morning at seven sharp after the inauguration; your airfare is already arranged. Do you have any questions?” the woman asked.

Yes. I asked what this was about, but she couldn’t answer that. I decided it was useless to ask anything else “No,” I replied.

“Good. Have a great day,” the woman said, sounding somewhat human right before hanging up the phone.

My entire body tingled at the thought of visiting the White House, not on a school tour, but upon request of the president of the United States himself.

The phone rang twice, three times, four, I was about to explode when my sister finally answered. “Oh my God!” I squealed into the phone.

“What is it?” Rowena asked excitedly.

“I’m going to the White House,” I blurted out.

There was a silence over the phone for a moment as I waited for my sister’s reaction of excitement to match my own. “Is that what you really want to do?” she asked.

I hated that she knew me so well. My dream, of course, had nothing to do with the White House, or politics, but this was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

“I don’t want to go back to being a political correspondent in Minnesota,” I grumbled.

“Yes, because you said you hated politics,” she reminded me.

“I don’t hate politics, I just hate politicians,” I argued.

She chuckled. It was good to hear her laugh after her long battle against a rare cancer, but I never liked it when that laughter was directed at me.

“You don’t think you’ll be swarmed with politicians in Washington, D.C.?” she sighed, catching her breath from her good laugh.
“This is a huge opportunity,” I pointed out.

“This is about Adam, isn’t it?” she asked, her voice quickly filling with concern.

“No. This is about bettering my career, adding something to my resume that very few can add,” I stated as firmly as possible.

Another silence. I knew she was analyzing my words, my tone, my motives. I was doing the same thing. I wasn’t really sure if this was about Adam, or about the opportunity. All I knew for sure was I didn’t want to go back to my old job.

“I just don’t want you to get hurt,” she said softly.

I couldn’t imagine Adam would ever hurt me in any way. “I’m a big girl, sis,” I assured her.

Even through her illness, and her treatments, Rowena always tried to take care of others, mainly me. Our mother had passed while I was in college, and Rowena took it upon herself to take her place, and she’d done a great job, for the most part.

“So, when do you leave?” she asked, changing the topic before it turned into a long lecture that would end with us not speaking for a month.

“Monday morning,” I said excitedly.

“That’s less than a week,” she said, causing my stomach to churn with anxiety.

“I don’t know if I’m ready for this,” I admitted.

Rowena sighed, and then reassured me with praise and encouragement. She’d worked closely with White House representatives over the years, mainly checking sources, but that was closer than I’d ever been to the White House, or anyone in it. Her tone became more excited once I asked for her advice, which she gladly gave.

“Can I stay with you?” I asked, knowing her answer would be yes.

“At least I’ll get to see you,” she said lovingly.

It had been nearly a year since I’d traveled to Foggy Bottom in Washington, D.C. where she lived alone in an upscale neighborhood. Her twins were away at college, and both determined to live on the west coast, somewhere warm and filled with women who wanted cosmetic surgery after they determined their specialty. Her ex-husband, Donald, still lived in the area, but they’d divorced right after she was diagnosed with cancer. I hated him, feeling as though he’d abandoned her in her time of need. She assured me it was her decision, not his, but I wasn’t sure if she was truthful, or just saving face.

My week was filled with beauty salon appointments, shopping for dress suits that were professional enough for the White House, but flattering enough for Adam, and popping Tums like they were candy.

“Hey, stranger,” Adam’s voice was so casual and soothing on the other end of my phone.

“Hey, uh, Mr. President,” I stumbled as I struggled with the proper way to greet my old friend.

His laughter roared through the phone. “It’s still just Adam.”

“I’m sorry. This is all so new to me,” I admitted.

“Me too,” he sighed.

My bags were packed and on my bed—more than I would need,1 I was certain. I had no idea how long I’d be there, or if I’d even come back to my tiny apartment. “I’m glad you decided to come,” he said.

“I wasn’t really given a choice,” I laughed.

“What do you mean?” he asked with concern.

“The woman on the phone wouldn’t give me any details, other than you requested my appearance,” I explained.

“I’m sorry. I knew I should’ve called you myself,” he said.

“Can I ask you, what this is about?” I asked.

“I need you here. I thought from your plans to arrive in the morning, you’d accepted my proposition already,” he sighed.

“I have yet to hear the proposition,” I replied.

Voices in the background were pulling his attention away from our phone conversation and leaving me in the dark still about my upcoming trip. “Quinn, I’ll have to talk to you when you get here. You are still coming, right?” he asked.

“Yes. Of course,” I assured him.

“Great. I can’t wait.”

The phone went silent as our conversation ended. He needed me? He couldn’t wait?

I threw myself onto the bed next to my suitcases and let out a squeal. The president needed me; he couldn’t wait to see me!

The driver arrived to collect me promptly at seven a.m. I’d been whisked away on business in fancy cars before, but this felt different, better. As we pulled into a private airport, my heart pounded hard against my chest. “Is this the right airport?” I asked cautiously.

The driver nodded, offering a warm smile through the rear-view mirror. He stopped the car just a few yards from a large private jet. My door opened and the driver stood by, assisting me as I slid to my feet.

It wasn’t Air Force One, but it was a private jet, chartered just for me. Adrenaline rolled through my veins as I watched two men scurry across the parking lot to grab my bags. Another man, tall, muscular, and wearing a blue Air Force uniform like the one I’d remembered on Adam, extended his hand to me. “Sergeant Glenn Peters, ma’am,” he said, gently taking my hand in his.

“Good to meet you,” I said, still in awe of the situation.

“I’ll be escorting you to Washington, D.C. Rest assured, you’re in good hands,” he said quickly, and then motioned for me to walk with him toward the plane.

Inside, the seats were large, covered in leather, and each had a small table in front of them. This was first class on an entirely new level. I could get used to this.

A blonde woman, tall and lean, offered me a glass of orange juice and a danish. My stomach was too upset to eat, but I accepted not to be rude. By the time the two-hour flight was over, I’d managed to eat about half of it and was feeling a little better.

I felt like a special agent, being whisked from my private jet to another black vehicle, complete with a driver wearing an earpiece. I wondered if he had communication directly to the White House. Surely he did.

He pulled up to the black iron gates that guarded the White House where a guard checked his credentials, scanned the backseat where I was sitting, and then opened the gate for us to enter. My skin crawled with goosebumps from the excitement, and the sheer sense of pride I felt.

Two men, both wearing black suits, stood at the front steps as the car pulled forward. One leaned in, opening my car door, while the other spoke to someone through his ear piece. “Welcome,” the man who opened my door spoke kindly.

“Right this way, Ms. Hamilton,” he said, taking my hand in his.

“I have bags. I’ll be staying at my sister’s,” I explained.

“Of course. The driver will drop them at the location you desire, and then retrieve you once your meeting has concluded,” he stated firmly.

I rambled off Rowena’s address to the driver, who signaled with confidence that he’d heard and understood the directions. The two men in black escorted me inside the White House where my heels clanked against a perfect marble floor with a shine so bright it was almost blinding me with the late morning sun coming in through the tall windows. A woman greeted me, her voice familiar from the phone call I’d received. “Glad to see you made it safely. The president is waiting,” she said without so much as a smile.

Her face was tight and unfriendly, her build slim with broad shoulders. She didn’t look as she sounded on the phone. I’d pictured someone manlier, heftier, but she was a petite little thing.

I followed her through the White House, in awe of the dramatic décor, red carpets, and grand staircases.

She stopped and turned to glance at me, as if to ensure that I was suitable to be presented. She opened the door leading into the Oval Office, a room I’d seen reproduced in many movies, but never in person until now.

The door closed as I took a quick look around, soaking in the surrealism of what was happening. “Quinn,” Adam’s voice pulled my eyes toward him.

He stood behind his desk, somehow looking as if he already belonged there. “Adam, uh, Mr. President,” I stuttered, quickly looking around to find the woman who’d escorted me in was already gone.

“It’s just Adam,” he said with a warm smile.

“This suits you,” I said, fondly gazing upon my dear friend.

“You think so?” he chuckled, moving towards me with open arms.

He smelled just as I remembered, of lavender and spice, as he pulled me into his arms. He drew back, holding onto my hands and giving me a once-over. “You look good,” he said.

My cheeks started to burn and my palms sweat. “So do you,” I stammered, swallowing hard to rid my throat of the lump growing.

“Have a seat,” he offered, motioning to the couches in the center of the room.

I sat, expecting him to take a seat across from me, but instead he sat right beside me, close.

He turned to face me, his knees grazing against mine. His blue eyes filled me with that familiar feeling of longing I’d missed so much, and his smile made me dizzy as it slid upward on his face. “So, I guess you want to know why I asked you here,” he said.

“Yes,” I replied softly, still feeling buzzed from the hormones flooding my body.

“I am offering you a position as a senior communications advisor and public liaison,” he said.

My throat began to swell once again, causing me to swallow hard as his eyes relentlessly gripped mine. “Why me?” I asked, my voice shaken.

“You’re the best,” he said with a smile.

“That’s very kind of you to say, but I’m sure there are others more qualified,” I argued the same case from the night he was elected.

“Quinn, you sell yourself short,” he said quickly.

His hand moved to my knee, resting just at the seam of my skirt. “We have chemistry. We work well together, don’t you agree?” he asked.

My panties clung to my pussy from his touch, but I couldn’t move to adjust them. Why did I wear silk?

“I do,” I agreed.

“Then say yes,” he urged.

“Yes,” I gasped before I had time to think.

Chapter Three

Adam was quick to turn me over to Michael Guidry, a top advisor on his team that would get me the clearance needed to begin my new position. It was a whirlwind as I was escorted through the White House, through many rooms I didn’t know existed. The doors and private hallways were everywhere, leaving me to believe I’d get lost the first time I was left on my own.

I thought I’d get to see Adam again before I left, but instead I was ushered to my driver outside the White House doors. I had one week to get my affairs in order, to brief myself on instructions for the position, and be ready to prove myself worthy.

“I can’t believe you took the position,” Rowena said as I unpacked my suitcases.

“Yes, it just fell out of my face. It was like I didn’t have any control,” I explained, feeling the same anguish for my rushed and hasty decision.

“I wish you’d at least given yourself time for all this to soak in,” she complained.

I growled, knowing she was right but not willing to admit it.

“You look good,” I said, quickly changing the subject.

Rowena ran her fingers through her short hair and smiled. I knew it bothered her to lose her beautiful, long locks, but it was growing back quickly. “I feel good,” she said softly, sitting on the edge of her guest room bed.

She had that motherly look in her eyes, the one she’d always get before giving me life advice. “Are you sure this isn’t about Adam?” she asked.

“Maybe a little,” I giggled.

Her eyes narrowed, and her lips tightened as she worked on wording her next comment carefully. “Quinn, he’s twelve years older than you, divorced, and he is the president of the United States,” she warned.

“He’s still the same Adam,” I defended.

“No, he’s not. You don’t want a scandal to ruin your career,” she added with her lecturing tone.

I fought back giggles as I thought about my fear of becoming the next Monica Lewinsky. “I won’t let him stick any cigars in my hoo haa,” I snorted, laughing hysterically after I spewed out my comment.

Rowena’s eyes widened as she stared at me with dismay. Her lips curled upward, and it was obvious she fought to keep her smile at bay. I continued to laugh, falling onto the bed until finally she couldn’t hold back and joined me.

My week of getting my personal affairs in order flew by. I’d contacted a moving company and a neighbor to oversee the job, and paid out of my lease. It was official. I was living in Washington, D.C., working as a senior communications advisor to the president—to Adam.

“We have a press conference today at one o’clock. You’ll need to review the speaker’s speech, prep him on anything he’s missed, and be ready for a meeting in the oval office in fifteen minutes,” Michael Guidry spouted out orders as quickly as I could jot them down in my notebook.

Holy shit, there was no settling-in phase to this job: just go, good luck, and fuck off.

Michael’s eyes lingered on my yellow blouse, steadying on the open button that revealed more flesh than he obviously approved. “Did you not have time to dress this morning?” he snapped with a sarcastic tongue.

My hands quickly gripped my thin blouse, furiously buttoning the top two buttons. Ugh, I felt constricted and uncomfortable. As Michael turned to walk away, I unclasped the top button to relieve the painful suffocation it caused.

I’d been following Michael around as he barked his orders since I walked through the front doors. I barely knew where I was, let alone how to get to the Oval Office.

I walked in the direction Michael had gone in, but at the end of the hall, he was gone. The hallway opened to the left, and to the right, each with sets of doors that looked unfamiliar.

“You lost?” I turned to see Adam standing behind me.

I knew I was blushing. I could feel the heat flowing from my cheeks. “Yes. Actually, I am,” I admitted.

“Walk with me,” he said firmly, but offered a friendly wink.

I took note of the path, knowing there’d be no way I’d get lost again. “So, first day going well?” he asked as he walked, not taking his eyes from his path.

“Yes. It’s a little overwhelming,” I admitted.

“I kept a map in my pocket the first few days,” he laughed.

“So, they follow you everywhere?” I asked, looking over my shoulder at the two men in suits.

Adam didn’t bother to look; he just smiled, and nodded. “I assume I’ll get used to it, eventually,” he said softly.

A group of suits gathered outside the office, all clearing a path when Adam and I walked towards them. “Good morning, Mr. President,” each one chanted like clones before Adam smiled, and opened the door to let them inside.

The meeting was simple, just a quick itinerary for the upcoming week. There were several events in the immediate area and a few in other states that needed to be weighed by importance. Myself, Michael, and the other top advisors would create a schedule, and if there was to be travel, Adam immediately assigned me to be his personal liaison.

I could feel the looks in my direction, all questioning the real reason I was even there. I couldn’t blame them. I questioned why I was really there.

“Thank you, everyone. Let’s have a great day,” Adam said, clearing the room within seconds.

“Quinn,” he said as I started to follow the crowd of suits out the door.

I stopped, turned, and nodded as he held up his index finger to motion me to wait. Michael gave me a quick glance, letting his eyes fall to my opened button with disapproval.

“Yes, sir,” I said as Michael closed the door behind him as the last man out.

Adam motioned for the two servicemen by the door to exit, which they quickly obeyed.

“I don’t know how you expect me to focus on running the country while you’re wearing that yellow blouse,” he said with a smile.

His dark hair had speckles of gray that glistened when the sunlight brushed across them. I wasn’t sure what to say, or how to react. My pussy was already swelling against my panties, and my nipples were gnawing at the material on my bra as they fought to push through. “I’m sorry. Is this not appropriate?” I asked, flushing with embarrassment.

It was a designer blouse, and the light-gray jacket and shirt that it was paired with gave it a professional, but feminine style. Maybe it was too feminine. Oh God, did I dress to turn on the president? I knew better than to do that. I was a professional, and Adam or not, this was my job.

“No. It’s stunning,” he said, leaning back against his desk.

His back shifted against the hard wood of his desk as my eyes accidentally glanced toward his package. My cheeks burned as I quickly moved my eyes to the windows behind him. “Thank you,” I whispered.

“I don’t mean to be so forward. It’s ju—just, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you,” he stammered.

My knees weakened, almost buckling beneath my small frame. I nervously pressed the material of my skirt flat against the palms of my hands as he stared into my eyes. I wanted to tell him I’d thought about him too, but I was frozen, speechless, delightfully stunned.

“I may be reading things wrong, but I thought we had a real connection out there on the campaign trail,” he said nervously.

My heart pounded, my breasts swelled against the thin yellow blouse. The president of the United States was flirting with me, nervously flirting with me.

“Is that why you wanted me here?” I asked, suddenly finding his advances offensive.

“No, of course not. I mean, I would love for something more, but you are the only one for this job,” he said convincingly.

“Something more?” I asked softly, loving the sound of those words.

He pushed away from the desk and moved toward me quickly. His arms wrapped around my waist, pulling me into him. God, his scent was enough to make me weak, and his hot breath enough to drop me to my knees. “We couldn’t,” I whispered.

“Couldn’t what?” he leaned in closer, letting his lips barely graze against mine. “We couldn’t kiss?” he whispered, pressing his mouth to mine.

My eyes closed as his soft, sensual lips covered mine and his tongue glided to part them. He tasted so sweet, so delicious, that I found myself lost in a passionate embrace.

He pulled away slowly. “That’d be a shame,” he said softly.

“A crying shame,” I gasped, still dizzy from his aggression.

“What else couldn’t we do?” he asked, his hands moving to my ass and squeezing my cheeks.

My head fell back and a soft moan escaped my lips as his mouth consumed my neck. He pressed into me, letting me feel his excitement hard against my side as his tongue traced the length of my neck until it wended its way back to my lips.

I was lost, in passion, in pure heat, in a fantasy. What was I doing? What were we doing?

I pulled away, adjusting my skirt and struggling to calm my heavy breathing. “We can’t,” I scolded mournfully.

“We’re both adults,” he argued convincingly.

Damn, he was gorgeous.

“Yes, and one of us just happens to be the president of the United States,” I pointed out.

“John Tyler, Woodrow Wilson, and Grover Cleveland all married while in office. You know they had to have dated as the president,” Adam spouted off his history facts quickly and with confidence.

“You’ve done your homework,” I chuckled.

“I have,” he admitted.

“I think people will believe I was hired only for your personal pleasure,” I said sternly.

“Once they see what an amazing job you do, they’ll know that isn’t true,” he argued.

“Yes. But the people hate scandals, and you’re fresh. Your divorce still has some damage control yet,” I added.

Adam sighed, pushing his hand to his chin as he stared at me with his dreamy blue eyes. “I can handle the divorce problems,” he said.

“Your ex-wife made some horrible claims about your infidelity,” I reminded him.

“All of which were untrue, and unproven,” he pointed out.

I’d worked closely with him during his campaign to clear his name, and I truly believed he was honest. His wife had divorced him, leaving him for another man, only to be angered when he ran for office. She’d always pushed him to run, but he wanted to start a family instead, and she refused. I knew the thought of him in office, possibly with a new first lady, made her sick, and all she wanted to do was ruin his chances.

“She made up names; we proved that, you proved that,” he insisted.

“I know that, and you know that. But the people never completely forget the claims, and something like this could make them bring it back up,” I argued.

I was right. He knew I was right.

He moved toward me again, this time slowly and seductively. I knew what he was going to do, and even though I thought it was wrong, I didn’t stop him.

The taste of his tongue tangled around mine, the sensation of his hands caressing my curves was deliciously wicked, even more so knowing it was wrong.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, pulling away.

His eyes were filled with pain and hunger. “I just need to prove myself,” I said quickly. “You’re right. You’re always right. That’s why you’re here,” he assured me with a smile.

My eyes glanced toward his package, noticing the bulge between his legs, and my gaze lingered to trace the outline of his cock beneath the thin trousers he wore. I’d remember the shape, the girth, and later that night I’d find a toy that matched to ease my sexual angst.

“Did you get settled in here in Washington?” he asked, painfully trying to change the topic of ‘us’ to anything else.

“Not entirely. I’m staying with Rowena,” I replied.

His face softened, “How is she?”

“She’s great. Cancer-free, and actually on a mini vacation right now at a spa in Virginia Beach,” I boasted.

“So, you’re all alone tonight?” he asked softly.

My pussy pressed hard against my panties as the silk material clung to my swollen lips. I knew what he was after, and I wasn’t in any condition to fight him off. “Yes. All week,” I stated, trying not to show my eagerness.

“Does she still live in Foggy Bottom?” he asked.

I nodded.

“I visited her not too long ago,” he said with a quick smile.

A knock on the door ended our conversation. When it opened at Adam’s request, it was Michael, staring at me with a wild glare. “Vice President Phillips is waiting, Mr. President,” he said, not taking his eyes from mine.

“I’ll be right there,” Adam said, immediately putting his game face back on.

I gripped my bag and moved toward the door, startled to see Michael just outside, leaning against the wall.

“Your lipstick is smeared,” he said softly.

I quickly pulled a compact mirror from my purse and used it to correct the obvious issue.

“You need to be careful. If anyone knows how ugly these things can get in the media, it should be you,” he warned.

“It’s not what you think,” I defended, knowing it was useless.

“I think you need to fix your lipstick, adjust your skirt, and button your blouse,” he said with a strangely friendly smirk.

“Fuck,” I mumbled under my breath as I did what Michael suggested. I knew how this looked: exactly like what it was.

“If it gets out that you and the president are having… whatever it is you’re having, his time here will be spent focusing on damage control of his image rather than our country,” he warned.

“We aren’t having anything,” I snapped, buttoning my top button of my blouse and feeling the suffocation take hold.

Were we?

Chapter Four

“How was your day?” Rowena asked.

“Aren’t you supposed to be relaxing?” I laughed.

I fell onto her fluffy white couch with my phone held tightly to my ear. It felt good to hear her voice, but I was grateful she wasn’t there to eye me up. One look and she’d know what I’d done.

“I am relaxing. I’m in a mud bath right now, actually,” she said calmly.

“My day was as expected. I got lost, found out there’s no training, and I’m already a week behind on the workload they gave me,” I groaned.

“Wow. So, they just threw you to the wolves, eh? Either they trust you or they’re testing you,” she laughed.

I knew the correct response, but I didn’t say anything. “I’ll let you get back to your soak. I have to go through a mountain of papers to create an event schedule for Adam,” I explained.

“Adam? Do you call him that in public?” she asked.

“No. Of course not. I call him hot pants,” I giggled and hung up the phone.

There was no activity on my phone as I looked at the screen. Adam had said he knew where Rowena lived, but there was no way he’d show up here. Was there?

I took a long, hot shower, hoping to wash away my sexual tension. But the streams of water flicking against my nipples and rolling between my legs just made me more frustrated.

My body craved Adam’s touch, not my own. My fingers lingered between my pussy lips, slowly rolling back and forth to part them. My juices were slippery, sliding my fingers inside my tight hole without effort.

I moaned, trying to imagine it was Adam who was playfully teasing my pussy. My eyes closed, and I remembered the outline of his cock, thick and hard. I pushed my fingers deep inside of me, two, and then three, but couldn’t satisfy the ache deep in my body.

My juices clung to my fingers as I pulled them from inside of me, letting them push against my swollen clit. The friction made my legs weaken and my lips part. The water rolled down my body, teasing my skin, flicking at my nipples like tiny hard tongues, and sliding down my back like a soft hand.

Waves of pleasure rolled through my body, pushing between my legs like a wild storm. My legs tightened together against my hand, my ass rested against the tile of the shower wall, and my orgasm released into a delicious, thunderous throb against my fingers.

The ache was still there, tamed, but not gone. I slipped into a pair of red, plaid sleep pants and a white tank top, and wrapped the towel around my head like a turban. The mountain of paperwork glared at me on Rowena’s dining room table. Might as well get some work done.

I selected an Air Show, a Special Olympics ceremony, and a triathlon for MS as my solid choices for Adam’s schedule, and was pondering between the other ‘maybes’ I’d stacked and sorted when my phone buzzed.

It was after midnight when I picked it up to see a text from Adam.

Adam: Open your door

I didn’t bother replying; instead, I rushed to the door, and peeked out the peep hole.

The two Secret Servicemen that followed Adam were standing on Rowena’s front stoop. I opened the door and they parted, revealing Adam in jeans, a t-shirt, and a baseball cap. “What are you doing here?” I gasped, quickly reaching for his arm and pulling him inside.

“I had to see you,” he explained.

Instantly, my body reacted with swelling, pulsations, and tingles in spots I wasn’t sure I’d ever felt come alive before. “What if someone has seen you?” I growled.

He shrugged his shoulders and smiled. “You’re worth it. To see you, like this, it’s worth it,” he said, his eyes moving upward and above my head.

Oh God! I still had a towel on my freakin’ head. I ripped it off, shaking my long, sandy-blonde hair out to fluff it up.

His hands were quickly on my hips, his mouth on mine, and his tongue warm and wild against mine. My craving returned in full force with a new, stronger hunger than before. My body rolled into his, pressing my breasts against his hard chest, and my pelvis into his thigh. He drove me wild, made me lose control. This couldn’t happen.

“No,” I gasped, pulling from our passionate embrace.

“You don’t want this?” he asked.

I couldn’t deny my attraction. “I do want it,” I gasped, trying to catch my breath.

Adam pulled me back into him, letting his mouth slide down my neck to the top of my breasts.

My nipples pushed hard against the material of the tank top, begging for attention. Adam quickly obliged my body’s pleading and covered my left breast with his mouth, sucking in my flesh through the thin material.

His tongue flicked at my nipple, and then his teeth clamped against it, tugging gently until I moaned.

“Adam. We can’t do this,” I insisted, pulling back away.

“I’m the president. I can do whatever I want. You can do whatever you want,” he said.

“I wish it were that easy,” I admitted, feeling my juices slide from my pussy and down my inner thigh.

His cock pushed hard against the denim, begging to be released and pleasured. My mouth watered at the thought of taking him into my mouth, tasting him, pleasing him. “Do you want me to leave?” he asked softly.

“No. But I think you have to,” I said remorsefully.

“This can be great. It will be great,” he said with a smile.

“One of us will end up the bad guy, and if it’s me, it’d ruin my career,” I argued.

“I think the American people would love to see me with you,” he insisted.

“Maybe so, but they may not,” I said.

“I’m not giving up, Quinn,” he said with a grin.

He pulled me in one last time, kissing me softly on the lips, and then the neck. “Damn, you’re sexy,” he growled, biting me gently on the top of my breast.

He stepped back, took a long look at me, lingering on my eyes for what felt like an eternity. “No. I won’t give up,” he assured me, and then turned to let himself out Rowena’s front door.

I missed him already.

Chapter Five

The mug in my hand was warm and soothing, and the hot java inside it was the jolt I needed to start my day. I hadn’t slept, not after Adam had left. My mind was frazzled, and my body tortured with sexual tension.

My phone beeped, alerting me that my driver had arrived. I stuffed the papers I’d been working on into my briefcase, slipped on my black jacket over my deep-blue blouse, and rushed out the front door.

“Good morning, Ms. Hamilton,” the driver greeted me as he held open the back door.

“Good morning, Lou,” I smiled.

He was my regular driver since I’d arrived, a kind man with a round belly, a pudgy nose, and warm smile. I slipped into the backseat, immediately pulling out my mirror and checking my face and hair as he drove me to the White House, to Adam.

“Do you have the schedule?” Michael asked with urgency as I walked into the overwhelming foyer.

“Yes. I finished it up last night,” I replied, pulling the final copy from my bag.

He gripped the paper, glanced quickly at the itinerary I’d created, and pursed his lips together. “A triathlon?” he asked with disapproval in his tone.

“Yes. Adam used to race all the time,” I insisted.

“Used to,” he said, his eyebrows lifting.

“I know he is still in amazing shape. It is for charity, and the American people need to see his strength so they can truly embrace the younger president,” I pushed.

He nodded, seemingly agreeing with my decision, and motioned for me to follow as he headed down the long hall.

“The president needs to approve this right away,” he said, walking the familiar path towards the oval office.

I’d taken Adam’s advice and created a cheat sheet, complete with maps for the White House, and directions to get to all the important areas for which I had access.

“Mr. President?” Michael knocked and announced his arrival as he opened the Oval Office door.

“Yes. Come in,” Adam said, motioning for us to enter.

The two Secret Service men that stood outside the office door were the same ones that escorted Adam to Rowena’s house the night before.

My cheeks blushed with heat as my eyes struggled to avoid contact. Neither of the men even looked my way, trained to stay out of any personal affairs, I presumed.

“The final schedule is ready for your approval,” Michael said, neglecting to give me any credit for its creation.

It was awkward facing Adam, but he continued with complete professionalism. . “Let me take a look,” he said, taking the paper from Michael and offering me a quick glance.

His smile was warm, but not flirty, easing my anxiety. “Wow, this looks like a pretty good mix,” he said, and then turned his attention to me. “This is your work?” he asked, but offered a tone that said he already knew it was.

“Yes,” I agreed, smiling just enough to be polite, but not to show any signs of my giddiness.

I could still taste his sweet kiss on my lips, and feel his tight grip on my ass. Stop it, Quinn!

“It looks like I’ll be traveling for a couple of these events. Can you clear your schedule?” he asked, looking directly at me.

His voice was filled with authority and strength, and nowhere on his expression could I see the desire, passion, and desperation he’d shown me just hours ago.

“Yes, Mr. President,” I agreed, keeping the same professional tone.

Michael’s eyes were on me; I could feel them without even having to look in his direction. My nerves were shaken as I remembered him finding me in such bad shape after our first make-out session.

“Thank you, Ms. Hamilton, Michael,” Adam said quickly.

The door to the Oval Office opened to reveal the VP and the two Secret Service men. Michael turned to leave, motioning for me to follow.

It was a relief to be out of the office, away from Adam and out of Michael’s judging eyes. “Great job,” Michael said, surprising me by his kindness.

“Thank you,” I said.

“It’s good that you know him so well. That’s already proven to be valuable with the first round of PR events,” he smiled.

Wow. Michael Guidry complimented me.

The rest of my day was spent with the press secretary. We discussed the mood of the people, which was fortunately mostly good. There were still questions about Adam’s divorce, and allegations his ex-wife had made before he ran for office. “You were the one closest to him during that time. And from what I understand, the one who helped clear it up,” Guy Louvre, the press secretary, stated matter-of-factly.

“It was not so much cleared up as it was never proven,” I pointed out.

“A single POTUS is always a struggle to keep in a good light,” Guy said. “A divorced one with a jilted, vindictive, and angry ex-wife is even harder to keep in the good graces of the people,” he added.

“What’s your plan?” I asked, hoping that we could work together to keep Adam looking confident and worthy until he had been given enough time to prove himself.

“Find him a woman,” Guy chuckled.

I swallowed hard. “I think it’s not wise to have him date so soon in office,” I argued, feeling a trace of jealousy flow through my veins.

“It’s just always easier to show the soft side of a POTUS when there is a first lady involved,” Guy insisted.

I couldn’t agree with him more from a PR standpoint, but I knew I wanted to be that woman, and that for me—for us—now wasn’t the time.

“There are plenty of amazing qualities that we can focus on,” I assured him.

“I’ll leave that to you then,” Guy said, sounding defeated, but not convinced I was making the right decision.

I glanced over his notes, changing a few comments about the scandal surrounding Adam’s ex-wife. “Stick to the facts. We know she’s lying, but we have no proof, nothing solid to make her this vindictive person she’s proven to be,” I stated.

“But we need to explain Adam’s side,” he argued.

“No, we don’t. Simply say there was never any proof to her allegations, and even though she was given every opportunity to provide names of the women she claimed to know had relations with her husband at the time, she never followed through. The president has always maintained his innocence in these allegations, and the court documents from their divorce have been made public and show no allegations that match what has since been said by the former Mrs. Andrews,” I spouted off quickly.

He nodded, jotted down what I said, and disappeared into his office to make his final draft for my approval.

Adam flew to Texas with the VP, one of the states he’d lost in the race. I’d created a list of things for him to say, not to say, and even what to wear while he visited. I was both excited and nervous to spend the few minutes alone with him in the Oval Office to brief him on my notes. “Do you have the notes?” Michael asked.

I pulled the folder from my briefcase and handed them to him, assuming he’d offer for me to tag along to deliver them.

He glanced over them, chuckling as he read. “Wow, you didn’t leave anything out, did you?”

“No. I think it’s best to give as much detail as possible,” I smiled.

“I’ll deliver these now. Why don’t you head home?” Michael suggested.

“There are still a few things I’d like to go over, and of course, if he has any questions—” I said, cut off by Michael’s interruption.

“I think this is more than enough. If he has questions, I’ll contact you,” he said with a stern smile.

I knew my face expressed my disappointment with my mouth parted, my eyes narrowed, and my jaw clenched tightly. Michael didn’t seem to notice, or care. “Have a good weekend, Quinn,” he said, and then turned to walk away.

Rowena sat on the back deck, sipping a glass of wine and thumbing through a magazine. “How was work?” she asked as I stepped outside.

“I love it,” I said excitedly.

She rolled her eyes and gave a small chuckle at my over-acting. She knew me well enough to know that I couldn’t possibly be that excited over my glorified babysitter-secretary position.

“How was your spa?” I asked, hoping to change the topic

“It was amazing,” she sighed, leaning back on the lounge chair, and closing her eyes as if she were remembering her experience. “So, what do you love about the job?” she asked, snapping back to the topic I knew would end on Adam.

“It’s just exciting being in the White House,” I said quickly.

“You mean it’s exciting being in the White House with Adam?” she asked with a smirk.

“That’s not what I said. I’ve barely seen Adam,” I shot back with a quick smile.

She seemed to be satisfied with my response, going back to her relaxing state without more questions or concerned looks.

I took my work into my bedroom, going over the itinerary for the upcoming events. My heart fluttered as my eyes glanced at the events I knew he’d asked me to clear my schedule in order to be able to attend by his side. It would be like our days on the campaign trail—well, sort of.

My stomach was twisting with emotion and worry as I realized the trips could end with us in bed together. He’d said he wasn’t going to give up, and I knew it wouldn’t take much for me to finally give in.

By Sunday evening, the anxiety of falling into Adam’s arms and the wrath of the media was more than I could bear. I had to talk to him, and at work, it was proving impossible.

I dialed his personal cell phone, hoping he’d be alone when he answered.

“Hello,” he said, a sweet Southern twang flirting in his voice.

“Sounds like Texas wore off on you,” I chuckled.

“Why, yes, ma’am, it surely did,” he laughed.

It was obvious he was alone from his playful tone, so I took a deep breath.

“I would like to talk, about… us, if that’s okay,” I said.

“This is something I’d prefer to do in person. Can you come to dinner tonight?” he asked.

“At the White House?” I asked, surprised by the suggestion.

“Yes. I’ll send a car for you,” he said quickly.

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea,” I said.

His voice was deep as it let out a chuckle. There was something sexy in the vibration of his throat rumble.

“It’s just dinner. The place is fairly private on the weekends,” he said.

“Okay,” I agreed, even though I knew it wasn’t the best of ideas.

“I’ll send the driver to Rowena’s at seven,” he said, and then paused.

I listened to the silence, wondering if there wasn’t something else he wanted to say, or expected me to say.

“Thank you,” I said finally, and then hung up before another awkward silence.

“Where are you off to?” Rowena asked.

I stood in the living room, wearing a sleek, sexy black cocktail dress, and my finest diamond necklace to accentuate my cleavage. “Dinner,” I admitted.

“Wow. He’s going to be knocked off his feet,” she said with a smile.

“Is it too much?” I asked, suddenly self-conscious of my choice.

“Too much? Is it personal or business?” Rowena asked.

“Both, I guess,” I stammered.

Her eyes narrowed, and her lips pursed tightly together as she gave me a once over. “Quinn,” she scolded.

My cheeks blushed with heat as my eyes tried to unlock from hers. “It’s not what you think,” I said.

“So, it is Adam?” she asked, prodding.

“Yes,” I admitted quickly.

“How will that look? You two out on a date for dinner?” she questioned.

“We won’t be out. He’s sending a car, and it’s at the White House,” I explained.

Rowena sighed and rolled her eyes. “That’s even worse,” she groaned.

“We just want to talk,” I said.

She chuckled. “There won’t be much talking with you in that dress.”

I knew she was right. What was I thinking? I should change. “Looks like your driver’s here,” she said, peeking out the front window.

Shit!

“Should I change?” I asked just as my phone beeped to alert me to the driver’s arrival.

“You can’t keep the POTUS waiting,” she smirked.

She was right again.

I offered my sister a weak smile and slid out of the front door. Lou immediately complimented me on my attire, making me even more aware that I’d dressed for a hot date, not for the talk I needed to have with Adam.

“Have a great night. I’ll be here to collect you when you’re ready,” Lou said with a strange smile.

“Thank you,” I said, and walked towards the two Secret Service men that were waiting and ready to escort me to the dining room.

Adam stood at the long wooden table with a drink in his hand. His dark hair had speckles of gray, his blue eyes widened upon landing on my image, and his lips, his delicious lips, curled into a crooked smile.

He nodded to the men who’d escorted me to the private dining room, and they quickly disappeared out of the room, closing the door behind them.

We were alone, in the White House, me, wearing this dress, and Adam wearing that sexy smile; we were alone.

“You look ravishing,” he said, his smile widening as he spoke.

My cheeks burnt, my palms beaded up with sweat, and my tongue frantically rolled around the back of my upper teeth.

“Thank you. You look very handsome,” I said softly.

His dress shirt sleeves were rolled to just below his elbows, and his jeans were perfectly pressed and bright-blue denim. He was casual, and I was anything but casual.

“Would you like a drink?” he asked, his voice somewhat shaken. Was he nervous?

“Yes, please,” I agreed, but scolded myself to keep it just one.

I couldn’t afford to lose control, not around Adam.

“What’s your pleasure?” he asked, his confidence returning in his tone.

“White wine,” I replied, still standing at the entrance of the grand room.

Adam moved to the bar, pouring me a white wine into a long-stemmed crystal glass. I walked toward him, my knees weakening with each step.

“Thank you,” I said, taking the glass from his hand.

He held on for a second, allowing his hand to graze against mine. Just that touch, that simple, quick touch, sent electricity through my veins.

“I’m overdressed,” I whispered.

He smiled wide, his eyes glistening against the light in the room. “No. You look amazing.”

“I—I just… I’ve never had dinner at the White House before, let alone with the president of the United States,” I said playfully.

I sipped on my wine, letting it soothe my nerves as he chuckled at my comment.

“This is all new to me too, Quinn,” he said softly.

He extended his hand to mine, pulling me closer. “You smell terrific,” he whispered, slowly allowing his nose to slide just inches from my neck.

My nipples hardened, but my body relaxed, almost melting into him at his words.

“Dinner is ready, Mr. President. Would you like to start?” a man wearing a white chef’s coat and tall hat entered the room.

His presence startled me, causing me to pull back from our intimate position. This is why you’re here, Quinn, because this can’t happen.

“Yes. That would be great,” Adam said, moving a couple steps from intimacy as well. “Please, sit,” Adam said, motioning towards the table.

He walked with me, moving slowly behind me, and I could feel his eyes on my ass. I took the seat directly to the left of the head seat as Adam pulled my chair out, and then back in as I sat.

“I remembered you loved pasta,” he said with a smile.

“Yes,” I smiled.

The chef returned back into the room with a silver tray. He placed a bowl of minestrone soup in front of Adam, and then myself. It was my mother’s favorite recipe, a treat she’d only take the time to make for very special occasions.

My first bite sent me back to when I was a girl and Adam had sat at our dining room table. It was the last time she’d made it.

“Being a single president, it gets lonely at dinner time,” he said, a flicker of pain shooting from his heart and out of his eyes.

“I’m sure you stay busy through dinner most nights,” I said.

“Yes. But if I had someone waiting, I’d have reason to not work so late,” he said softly.

Dinner was linguini noodles with scampi shrimp and roasted artichokes, served with a clam sauce better than any I’d ever eaten before. “Would you like to come to my private quarters?” he asked, his voice shaken and nervous once again.

I was frozen with my thoughts, unable to answer due to the struggle in my mind. No. I shouldn’t, that will only complicate things. Yes. I should; he’s Adam Andrews, my dear friend and the man I’d had a crush on for years. Who cares that he just happens to be the POTUS?

“I promise not to bite. It’s just more private to talk about whatever it is you had on your mind,” he said sweetly.

“Yes. I’d like that,” I said quickly, wanting desperately to believe that’s all we’d do: talk. I knew better.

Adam scooted his chair from the table and then moved behind me to pull mine out. He took my hand, my sweaty, shaking hand in his, and smiled sweetly as he guided me from the dining room to his private quarters.

The large doors opened to an impressive space, but all I could focus on was the large bed.

“Are you okay?” he asked, pulling me into him closely.

His breath was hot as it gently hit my neck. My body melted into his arms, my mind went blank, forgetting any reason I had to talk, or even what I wanted to talk about.

“Can I kiss you?” he whispered.

No. Tell him no, the reasonable voice inside my head warned.

The only thing that escaped my lips was a sigh as my head fell back and invited Adam’s lips to explore my neck. “Does that mean yes?” he chuckled softly.

“Yes,” I gasped as his mouth pressed into my sensitive skin, his teeth grazing slowly against the large vein in my neck.

He pulled back, stared into my eyes with the deep-blue beauties that melted my heart. My eyes closed as he neared my mouth, our lips touching to create a thunderous explosion of passion.

His hands gripped at my waist, pulling tight with his fingers digging into my flesh as I ground against his erection.

“I can’t stay away from you,” he groaned, his voice vibrating through my nipples.

I couldn’t stay away from him, either. I’d come here to talk, to tell him we couldn’t do this, and here I was, in his private bedroom, in his arms, under his spell.

The weight of his hand slid to my shoulder, sliding my dress strap down, and his lips immediately pressed into the newly exposed skin.

My mouth searched his neck, sucking his sensitive flesh and causing him to growl. My panties clung to my skin, my pussy swelling and pressing against the silk. The room spun out of control as my head went light, and my body limp with excitement.

I closed my eyes, trying desperately to pull myself from this passion, but it was useless. His grip, his mouth, his scent—it was too much to deny.

Adam pushed into me, walking me backward until my legs hit the soft mattress. His hand pressed into the small of my back, bending me onto the bed. I didn’t fight him.

The mattress swelled around me like soft clouds as I squirmed with excitement and anticipation. Adam stood back, staring at me. His lips curled into that sexy, irresistible, crooked smile. He shook his head slowly, growling as his eyes rolled down my body, and then back up again.

Even without touching me, he was sending wild sensations through my body, causing me to tingle, ache, and yearn for his hands, mouth, and body to be on me.

His fingers moved to his shirt, resting on the top button as his blue eyes dug into me with hunger and desire. I watched as he unbuttoned his shirt, one button at a time. His strong chest was tan, smooth, and chiseled as it was revealed from under the material.

I sighed as he slid the shirt from his body. His tongue glided across his lips slowly, and he leaned himself over my body.

He dangled his lips over mine, close enough to feel the heat of his breath, but not close enough to taste.

I reached up, unable to handle his teasing any longer, pressing my mouth against his. My tongue explored his, entangling around it and sucking every ounce of delicious flavor he had to offer.

His hard cock ground into my side and upper thigh, teasing me with strong thrusts, and a smooth, erotic rhythm.

He lifted from me, taking his mouth from my reach. My hands gripped around him, digging into his back with my long fingernails as I arched my back to reach him once more.

He chuckled, slid down my body, his mouth stopping to gently kiss each breast over my black dress.

His breath was hot as it slid down my body, his hands heavy as he pressed into my thighs, sliding my dress up past my hips.

My back arched, my body squirmed, and I let out a moan as his mouth pressed into my flesh. Soft kisses, first on my thigh, and then on my panties, made my pleasure build into a wild storm that was growing out of control quickly.

“I need to taste you,” he whispered, his eyes looking into mine from between my open legs.

His lips opened, taking in a mouthful of my panty-covered pussy. I was already excited, wet, and swollen. His tongue slid along the silk fabric, teasing me with long laps as my lips parted and moans rolled through the large room.

My hands slid to my hips, sliding my panties away from my skin as his mouth continued to search through my delicate skin.

I felt his hands touch mine, helping to relieve me of the constricting material between my legs until finally, I was freed.

His tongue slid through my pussy lips, tasting my sweet juices for the first time. I gripped his hair in my hands, sifting the longer locks through my fingers and tugging gently.

My body rolled towards his mouth as his tongue entered my tight hole, fucking me with a quick rhythm and bringing me closer and closer to climax.

The room fell dark as my eyes rolled to the back of my head, and the world seemed to stand still as my orgasm ripped through my body and into his mouth.

My legs tightened around his head to the point I felt I was squeezing him too hard. I called out his name, tugged at his hair to pull him towards me, wanting more, wanting it to never end.

“This is what I want, what I’ve wanted for years,” he sighed, sliding up my body.

“Me too, but—” I said, cut off from his mouth pressing against mine.

The sweet flavor of my orgasm dripped from his tongue onto mine. But what? I didn’t know.

The weight of his body pressed into me as he leaned across me to reach the drawer of his nightstand. He pulled out a foil package, a condom, and proceeded to split it open across the top. My body tingled with anticipation, wanting nothing more than for him to be inside of me, filling me, pleasuring me, to be pleasuring him.

He pulled back, lifting to his knees between my legs as he unfastened his jeans. My eyes wanted to shift to his waist, to see what he was unleashing, but they were locked onto his eyes. They were so blue, they lost me.

“I want this to work. However you need it to be, I’ll trust you,” he said softly.

My hands were already working to help his pants down his legs as he pressed back into me. The condom already in place, ready to protect us as we entered a very risky relationship.

“I just don’t want either of us to get hurt,” I said softly, feeling the words of Michael heavy on my heart.

If he was focusing on us, or a scandal, he couldn’t focus on the country. I knew that was true.

Adam was a good man and had the ability to be one of the best presidents this country had ever seen. I didn’t want to be the one to destroy that. And I certainly didn’t want to be the one to be hated by all of America for being the one who destroyed that.

“We won’t get hurt. I’d never let you get hurt,” he gasped, sliding his hard cock into the wet spot between my legs.

My entire body shuddered, losing control of my thoughts with the intent of the hard meat waiting at my excited entry.

“Promise?” I gasped, already lost in the moment, and ready to take the plunge whether he promised or not.

My legs parted, allowing him to slowly slide into my body. “I promise. Whatever you want,” he whispered.

He filled me with the satisfaction I’d been yearning for as he thrust himself into me. My fingers dug into his back, my nails sliding into his smooth, soft skin.

My head pushed back into the mattress, arching my back to take him deeper as his mouth sucked on my neck.

My little black cocktail dress, the one that Rowena warned me was too sexy for business, was wrinkled around my midsection as Adam’s mouth wandered down my neck to my breast.

I knew it was just Adam, the man I’d had a crush on since I was just a girl, but my mind wouldn’t let go of the fact that he was now the president of the United States. I was fucking the president of the United States.

My hips rocked into his, grinding my pussy against his pelvis as he thrust into me. His breathing was growing rapid, his groans becoming louder and deeper with each thrust, and I knew it wouldn’t be long before I brought him to his satisfaction.

I reached my hand between us, sliding it between my legs, and then his. I gripped his balls, massaging them gently, and then tugging at them as they tightened into his body.

His cock swelled, spreading me open wider than I’d ever been, and then throbbed in the same rhythm as the pulses that began in my clit. His head lifted, his eyes locked onto mine, and his bottom lip trembled as he let out one last growl.

My second orgasm was in sync with his, no longer in my control. As he throbbed inside of me, I throbbed against him, our bodies becoming one with each electric pulsation.

“Will this work?” I whispered in his ear as the weight of his body pressed down onto me.

“We’ll make it work,” he said softly, gently kissing me on the cheek and rolling to my side.

I still wasn’t sure how, or1 if it was even possible, but I knew I wanted it more than ever. No matter what Michael said, what Rowena said, or what the world said, this is what felt right to me. There had to be a way to make it work.

Chapter Six

Two weeks sneaking around with Adam, and it had become my drug. Adrenaline flowed through my veins like heroin every time we were together.

An attack on a military base had brought the country to a new height of sensitivity and stress, and Adam had been working hard to come up with the answers America wanted, that America needed.

I was by his side, guiding him through the personal aspects, but felt helpless that I couldn’t offer any help with the strategic planning of protecting our country.

The meeting was one of many in the last two weeks, but the sexual urgency between us was stronger than ever.

He worked all hours of the night, mostly with the chief of staff to form a plan of action. There were multiple press meetings, and for each one I had to help create a sense of calmness, and trust for the people. We needed each other, more than ever, but there seemed to be no way to find the time to be alone.

“I’ve closed the borders,” Adam announced to everyone in the Oval Office.

It was a surprise to most, but not to me. We’d spent late hours texting, talking, and snuck a few moments alone where he unleashed his plans to protect our country against future attacks.

It was the right move. It was the only move. But it was one of the riskiest for his reputation.

“Just until we find out who was behind the attack, and from what I understand, that will be very soon. Possibly by end of day,” he said calmly.

His authority, his strength, and the calmness he exuded made me quiver with desire.

My eyes locked onto him, watching his lips move as he spoke, but not hearing his words. All I could think about was how they felt against my skin, on my neck, between my legs.

“Are you sure you want to isolate the country this way?” the secretary of state spoke up.

Adam smiled, a warm but weak smile. “I believe this is the only way not to isolate the country,” he said.

The press secretary was asking question after question, pushing for more details, ones that Adam was not willing to give. “You can talk to Quinn. She has everything you need,” he told him, causing every eye in the room to turn to me.

I felt uncomfortable, vulnerable, and as the VP rolled his eyes up and then down my body, I felt exposed.

There were moments, ones where Adam and I hadn’t been so careful. He was pleasuring me with his mouth, almost getting me to my edge of ecstasy when his Secret Service men had to interrupt for an abrupt meeting with the chief of staff. I knew they knew, especially since they’d delivered him to Rowena’s house that night so many weeks before.

If they knew, who else knew? Did everyone know, or at least suspect, that something was going on between us?

Michael glanced at me, his eyes narrow and disapproving. He knew. I knew he knew. I wanted to crawl into my own skin and disappear from all the prying, judging eyes in that room.

“How can she help answer these questions?” the press secretary pushed.

“She can help you answer the questions that will be asked. That’s why she is here. She is the best,” Adam said, his glance at me too long, too loving, too much.

“That is all I have for you right now. Hopefully, I can answer more questions later today,” Adam assured them, motioning for everyone to leave him.

I hated that our events, the ones where I was scheduled to be by his side, alone, had been canceled. This outburst of terrorism had been isolated to one event, but it was scary that it had made its way to a secured military base.

The country was in an uproar, feeling that there was no protection, and this new president, this young president, wasn’t doing anything to make it safer.

I knew the weight he carried on his shoulders, and my heart ached that I couldn’t be closer to him through it all.

I left the room with the rest of the advisors and staff that had clearance for the meeting. The press secretary grabbed onto my arm, pulling me to him for the details Adam had promised.

There wasn’t much I could offer, other than a way to avoid answering certain questions and how to answer the ones that were inevitable.

“Can I speak with you?” Michael asked, pulling me away from the intense drilling I was dealing with at the moment.

I walked with Michael down the long hallway lined with red carpet. We stopped in a secluded hallway, him pulling me aside. “Is there something going on I should know about?” he asked.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

His eyes rolled back into his head and he let out a sigh. “Seriously?” he asked, staring directly into my eyes.

“I will let you know anything that is important,” I said softly, knowing exactly what he was asking me.

“I think the information you are holding back could very well be very important,” he whispered loudly.

“I’m not holding back anything that matters. When it does, if it ever does matter, you will be the first to know,” I said, smiling, and quickly turning to walk back to the Oval Office.

Adam leaned against his desk. He was alone, not only physically, but in his lost world of thoughts. I hated it. I wanted to comfort him, to be there for him, but things were growing more and more complicated each day.

“We have to cool it,” I said quickly.

“Cool it? I’ve been taking cold showers for two weeks,” he chuckled, making light of the stress I felt.

“I’m serious,” I said sternly.

His eyes widened and filled with confusion. “What’s wrong? I’m doing everything your way,” he insisted.

“I think we are more obvious than we realize,” I explained.

He moved towards me as I backed up, pinning my back against the curve of the wall.

“You’re just paranoid. The situation right now has everyone on edge,” he stated.

He was right. But that didn’t change what I knew. What I knew, and couldn’t tell him. Michael knew—that was obvious—but Adam didn’t need that burden, not now.

“I’m not paranoid,” I replied.

He was pressed against me, pinning me to the wall with his arms on either side of me. Damn, he smelled so fucking good.

“I think you are,” he said softly.

“Your Secret Servicemen brought you to Rowena’s. They know,” I said.

He chuckled. “They are hired and trained to know nothing other than what they are told to know,” he said.

“For the right price, anyone will talk,” I snapped.

Adam pulled away, took a couple steps back, and stared into my eyes.

“I don’t want to lose you, Quinn,” he said softly.

I didn’t want to lose him, either. But I couldn’t live with myself knowing I caused him any harm. I no longer cared about my reputation. That’s the moment I knew I was in love with Adam Andrews, the president of the United States.

Chapter Seven

“This mess has really split the country,” Rowena said, surfing through the news stations on the TV.

“I know,” I sighed, sinking into the couch.

I already knew things were starting to look up, at least for Adam, but I couldn’t say anything.

“When is the press meeting?” she asked.

“In about ten minutes,” I told her, knowing the rest of the country would find out when their favorite comedy show was interrupted.

“Why aren’t you there?” she asked, her eyes pressing into my soul.

I hated that I’d kept all this from her. I’d never kept secrets from my sister.

“I’ve done my part,” I said calmly.

Even after Adam announced that they’d identified and captured the party responsible for the attack, there was still a tear in the country, and it would take a lot of work to repair it.

Us, that wasn’t an option, at least not as far as I could see. It had to end. He was destined to do great things, not only for himself, but for the entire world. I couldn’t be the woman who cost him his second term.

“Are you okay?” Rowena asked, turning down the volume on the TV.

I smiled while I struggled to pull myself together. I wasn’t okay. I knew that, and she knew that. I had to tell her why.

Tears rolled down my cheeks as she quickly moved towards me with open arms. I confessed to the relationship, and to the feelings I was having. “I can’t be the cause to any of his pain,” I cried in my sister’s arms.

“So, you love him?” she asked.

I pulled back, wiped my tears from my cheeks, and nodded. I did. I hadn’t told him, I hadn’t said it aloud, but I did.

“It sounds like he feels the same way about you. He’s not concerned with himself, only you,” she insisted.

“His reputation has been so fragile. I can’t risk him losing a chance at another term, or worse, having the people distrust him during this one,” I sighed.

Adam appeared on the TV screen, pulling Rowena’s attention from me for a moment as she watched and listened. His speech was perfectly delivered just as I’d written it, and he used all the proper body language to portray honesty, strength, and most importantly, humanity.

“It looks like he’s doing just fine,” Rowena said. “Thanks to you,” she added with a smile.

“So, they’ll just hate me. That won’t help anything either. He needs me,” I sighed.

Rowena laughed. “Why would they hate you?” she asked.

“Americans always need a villain,” I argued.

My sister rolled her eyes and tightened her lips as she shook her head. “You’ve spent so much time dealing with negative media; you’ve forgotten what positive media is like,” she said sternly.

I wasn’t sure I understood.

“Americans are humans. Humans love a good story, and trust me, they aren’t always looking for the bad in it,” she insisted.

“This is the government,” I growled.

“How many good stories come from the government?” she laughed.

I couldn’t think of anything.

“Exactly,” she said after my long pause.

“Quinn, you are the best writer, personal marketer, and media spinner I know,” she said.

That was quite the compliment coming from Rowena. She’d worked with writers from all genres, and as an editor, she was trained to see flaws others would miss.

“What are you saying?” I asked.

“I’m saying, if you love him, and he loves you, spin this love story into something amazing like I know you can. Quit hiding from it, embrace it, and give the people what they deserve from the government for once: the truth,” she suggested.

“But what if this love story doesn’t have a happily ever after?” I asked.

“Then you deal with it then. Stay truthful and people will stay loyal,” she advised.

Adam was still answering questions on the screen, all of which I had anticipated and prepped him for. My heart swelled. What if she was right? Could this be something real?

“You both deserve something good in your life,” Rowena said, clicking the TV off as Adam answered his last question. “Did you just see what happened there?” she asked, glancing towards the television.

“What?” I asked, confused about her point.

“I know you well enough to know you spent hours making sure those were the questions asked, and that he knew exactly how to answer them,” she insisted.

She wasn’t wrong. My ear hurt from hours on the phone with networks and papers, talking to the key players about what they were after. I’d planted seeds for weeks, worked out special deals, exclusives, and a bundle of other promises to ensure certain questions would be asked. Adam, as well as the press secretary, had a list of reporters to call upon, and in what order. I couldn’t make them ask anything, or even imply what I wanted them to ask. But I could get into their heads and work my PR magic. Maybe I could do that with Adam and me.

Chapter Eight

The next week was a whirlwind, filled with meeting after meeting, and press conferences back to back. Adam had proved to be a powerful leader, not only efficient, but fair. Those who opposed his closed borders were finally sliding back toward his side once they saw him open them back up with fair and protective rules in place.

There were still a few groups that mocked him, challenged him, and did their best to smear his image, but that was part of the title.

“I’m really proud of you,” I said, sneaking into his office alone.

His Secret Servicemen were obliged to give me entry whenever I asked, something Adam insisted upon, even though they protested.

He moved toward me quickly, his arms consuming me, and his lips covering mine.

Our bodies fell into one another, both needing the connection we’d so desperately missed. “Maybe now things can get back to normal,” he said, pulling back just enough to stare into my eyes.

“Things will never be normal,” I said with a smile. “At least not for the next eight years,” I laughed.

Adam’s eyes widened and his lips curled into a bright smile. “Wow. You have a lot of faith in me, don’t you?” he asked playfully.

“Yes,” I said softly.

“I have faith in us,” he said.

I took a deep breath, and let out a soft sigh. “That’s what I want to talk to you about,” I said.

He dropped his hands from mine and took a step back. His eyes were filled with worry and a hint of irritation. “I thought we were over this,” he said.

“I’m not trying to run from you,” I said softly.

His eyes narrowed, but the irritation quickly left. “Like before?” he laughed nervously.

I’d never actually talked to him before; instead, I’d ended up in his bed. I knew I’d been paranoid, and had given him plenty of reason to think I was ready to bail on him again. But he needed to trust me right now, and just listen.

“I think the only way we can continue this is to be honest,” I said.

Adam took another step back and leaned against the antique wood of his large desk. Even stressed, he looked more powerful than any man I’d ever known. It wasn’t the power of the presidency; I knew that. Adam had always been a man I’d admired and looked up to, well before the thought of campaigning had even entered his mind.

“Honest?” he asked.

His hands pushed into the pockets of his trousers, and I knew it was to keep from showing telltale signs of anxiety, a trick I taught him.

“I think the people can handle the truth,” I said with a smile.

“About us?” he asked.

“Yes,” I replied.

“But you said that would destroy one of us, if not both,” he stated firmly.

“I did say that. But I was wrong,” I admitted.

“Were you wrong, or do you just want the attention?” he asked.

I was shocked. “The attention?” I snapped.

“You are amazing at what you do. You’ve never been wrong. I mean, just look at how well you pulled me from this last mess. Now you say you’re wrong, and I’m supposed to be okay with that?” he argued.

Anger rose in me like a fire. This is what he wanted, at least if it meant getting into my pants. Now, there was no need. He’d gotten what he wanted, and he didn’t have to flaunt me to the media, or explain me, or himself. It was easy. “You just want to keep me your secret lover?” I hissed.

“Wow. That was never my intention. You know that. You’re the one who insisted that no one could know,” he said, his voice firm and his tone filled with irritation. “You know I’d do anything for us to be together, that I have done anything,” he said.

“What have you done?” I asked.

“I brought you onto the campaign; I brought you on here. I followed your rules,” he scowled.

My blood boiled. “You brought me onto the campaign, to here?” I asked, my voice raising.

“Yes. I did. I wanted to be near you,” he said.

“So, it had nothing to do with my ability to clear your tainted reputation, to get you in the public eye, into their hearts, to clean up your messes and make you look invincible?” I asked, now yelling more than talking.

“Of course I brought you on because you were amazing, and I knew you could do amazing things. That doesn’t change the fact that I wanted to be near you,” he said softly.

“Okay, then let’s make it public,” I said firmly.

“It’s not that easy,” he insisted. “If we’d done that early on, sure. Now, it’s just complicated, and I can’t risk your career being tarnished by a scandal,” he added.

“I can handle myself, and my reputation. I think America would appreciate a love story, and some truth from the White House for once,” I said, fighting back the tear in my eye.

“I’m not sure that’s the PR genius I hired or the woman I’ve been making love to at night. I can’t take a risk on your career, on mine, based on what? A mood? A possibility that it could all work out? It’s just not the right time; you said so yourself just days ago,” he said.

The tear I fought won, rolling down my cheek and onto the floor. It was obvious Adam had been bluffing all along, not willing to really name us as a couple. I was too wrapped up in his power, his beautiful eyes, and his sensual touch to see it. He wanted me, all right: that part was true. He wanted me to be his dirty little secret.

“If that’s how you feel, then we have to end this now. I can’t be your dirty little secret any longer,” I snapped. “The truth will come out, it always does. So, it’s best I leave now before someone decides to start spreading rumors,” I insisted, turning to leave without even looking at him for one last goodbye.

I hated the feeling in my chest as I closed the door. My heart was breaking in two. I knew it was better to break it off now, before I fell any deeper, if that was even possible.

Chapter Nine

Michael pushed for answers when I called, telling him I’d emailed him everything he needed for the week. “Is everything okay?” he asked.

I choked a little as I tried to fight back tears. “It’s fine. I just need some time off,” I explained without much detail.

“You promised you’d tell me anything that could be even remotely important,” he reminded me.

Tears rolled from my eyes and down my cheek. My hand was dampened with my sadness as I held on to the phone, working hard to swallow my pain and speak clearly. “Obviously, there is nothing important to report,” I said, my voice shaken, and obviously filled with sorrow.

I sniffled, swallowed hard, and took a deep breath as Michael remained silent for a few seconds. “Quinn, I’m coming over,” he insisted.

“No,” I protested.

“I know you haven’t confided in me, and I understand why. But you need a friend,” he said softly.

I sobbed relentlessly from his kindness. “Please, just give me the week,” I pleaded.

“Call me if you need anything at all,” he said.

“I promise,” I replied, and then hung up the phone.

Rowena felt horrible for pushing me to make Adam and me public, telling me so constantly.

“It’s not your fault,” I said her over and over, trying to convince her.

“Don’t you think you should answer his calls?” she asked.

I gripped my phone, staring at the screen. There were more than a dozen missed calls from Adam, and countless texts that I couldn’t bring myself to read. “No. It’ll just go back to the way it was before. I love him. He has a way of making me forget my convictions,” I said.

“And you have a way of making him forget his,” she said softly.

I didn’t find that statement to be true. He hadn’t given up anything in this endeavor. He was able to get what he wanted from me both professionally and personally. He didn’t have to announce or proclaim his feelings, and he held all the power. He knew that. I didn’t realize it until I pushed for something more.

“I was foolish. You warned me,” I smiled.

The next week, Adam continued to call and I continued to ignore any attempt he made to contact me.

“Someone is here for you,” Rowena said, peeking in my bedroom door where I’d barricaded myself for days.

“Who?” I asked, fearing it was Adam coming to sway me back into his bed.

“Michael Guidry,” she replied.

My stomach churned as I got up and took a quick glance in the mirror at myself. My hair was pulled tight into a ponytail and my face hadn’t seen makeup for at least two days. “I’m not in the mood to see anyone,” I said quickly.

“He said he’s not leaving. I’ll send him in here,” she snapped and disappeared from my doorway.

I knew she was irritated that I’d let this breakup get to me so badly. I was contemplating going back to Minnesota and getting my old job back, but I didn’t want to tell her that just yet. I didn’t want to tell anyone.

Michael stood in Rowena’s living room with a bottle of wine. “I thought you could use a drink,” he said, his voice kind and warm.

He wasn’t wrong.

We sat outside on the deck, drinking and talking for over two hours. He filled me in on everything that had happened in the White House and pleaded for me to come back. “Don’t let this ruin your dreams,” he insisted.

“That’s just it. This wasn’t my dream,” I admitted.

My dream was to have a talk show, one where my guests could share stories of inspiration. Ever since I wrote the article on my sister and her battle against cancer, I knew that was my dream.

Adam veered me off course. My attraction for Adam veered me off course.

“Are you coming back at all?” he asked, sipping the last of the wine from his glass.

“I don’t know yet,” I sighed.

“If it’s any consolation, he’s been a mess,” Michael said.

My heart ached to learn Adam was hurting as well. I couldn’t let that consume me. He’d had his chance; he’d made his decision. Now, I had to make mine.

“Don’t tell him you saw me,” I pleaded as Michael was leaving.

“Okay,” he agreed, closing the door and leaving me to deal with my future.

“I’m going back to Minnesota,” I announced to Rowena at breakfast.

She set her coffee mug on the table and stared into my eyes with confusion. “Quinn, why would you do that?” she asked.

“I’ve given it a lot of thought. I don’t want to hurt, but I don’t want to hurt Adam, either. If I stay, and I continue on in my position in the White House, sooner or later, what happened between us will be leaked by someone. That could destroy us both, but since we wouldn’t be together any longer, most likely him more than myself,” I explained.

She paused as if she were trying to find an angle that proved me wrong. “You’re right,” she agreed after a slight hesitation.

For some reason, her agreeing with me didn’t feel as good as I thought it would.

I spent the day, and a good portion of the evening, looking for a place to live and talking to the people at my old job. They were all shocked I’d leave a high-powered position at the White House, but were very excited to have me back.

A knock on the door pulled me from the couch where I surfed online for houses to rent in my old neighborhood.

I opened it to reveal Adam’s Secret Service team on Rowena’s stoop. “I don’t want to see him,” I scoffed, slamming the door hard.

One of the men’s hands stopped the door from closing, pushing it back open. “I’m afraid this isn’t a request,” he said firmly.

“What? You’re going to drag me there kicking and screaming?” I chuckled sarcastically.

“If I have to,” he said without emotion.

I knew this was a battle I wouldn’t win. I grabbed my bag, followed the men to the black car, and quietly rode to the White House.

I was escorted to Adam’s private quarters, where the bed we’d made love in mocked me.

Soon after the men left, Adam entered.

“This is a real dick move, even for you, Adam,” I snarled.

He didn’t speak as he moved toward me. His blue eyes penetrated through my skin, and his confident swagger made me weak in the knees.

This is why I knew I couldn’t see him.

“I had no choice. I missed you,” he said softly, his arms wrapping around me.

I tensed as he squeezed me, pulling away as soon as I found my escape.

“So, you want to go public?” I asked sarcastically.

“I don’t think we should announce anything,” he said.

I let out a growl and moved towards the door. He caught me in his arms, pulling me back to him. Damn, he smelled so good.

“But I think we should quit hiding our relationship. Let it come out on its own,” he said.

It wasn’t the perfect plan, but it was enough to make me stop trying to run from the room, from him.

“I love you, Quinn,” he said softly, tears welling in his eyes.

It was all I wanted to hear. All I’d been wanting to hear this whole time. “I love you too, Adam,” I whispered. “You’re sure about this?” I asked.

He pulled me into his chest, letting me get a long whiff of his irresistable scent. “I’ve never been surer of anything in my life.”

I let my arms wrap around him, squeezing him tightly into my heart. Our mouths searched for one another, finally landing our lips together for a powerful spark. We fell onto the bed, kissing passionately as we rolled in each other’s arms.

Adam lifted from our embrace. His hands brushed my hair from my face as his lips gently landed on my nose for a sweet kiss. “I plan on flaunting you all over town,” he teased.

I giggled at the thought of being on Adam’s arm in public.

He rose up to his knees, squatting with his legs straddled over me. His hands worked quickly to unbutton my blouse, revealing my tight, full breasts. His eyes soaked me in, and then his mouth consumed my soft skin, paying close attention to my nipples with his skillful tongue.

I arched my back, pushing my body toward him. His hands pulled at my pants, slipping them from my body. I hadn’t bothered to put panties on after my shower that night, and the look in Adam’s eyes proved he was pleased with my decision.

“Damn, you’re sexy,” he gasped, quickly sliding down to let his mouth taste what he had just uncovered.

My moans were filling the room fast as his tongue explored my tight pussy with forceful, long thrusts. I was close to coming when Adam lifted up from between my legs, pouncing from the bed and undressing while I watched with delight.

My body was squirming from his teasing as he worked his way back onto the mattress, and then towards the head of the bed.

His hard cock was long, thick, and smooth. His hand wrapped around it tightly, stroking it until the tip turned purple, and then soft pink as he released.

My mouth watered, working up the saliva to be able to take him into my throat. A salty, sweet taste filled my tongue as it rolled around his member. He let out soft growls as I worked him in deeper and deeper between my lips.

“Don’t make me come,” he whispered between growls.

Soft flesh warmed my fingers as I gripped his balls, massaging them in the same rhythm my mouth pleased his cock.

“Stop,” he whispered, pulling back.

My suction tightened, not willing to lose this delicious flavor so soon. “I want to come together,” he insisted, slowly working himself from my grip.

I let my legs fall apart, spreading my pussy wide open for his viewing pleasure. I loved that he saw me, that he looked at me with such hunger, and that his cock twitched when my fingers slid down my belly to the swollen clit pushing out from my patch of pubic hair.

He pulled a condom from his nightstand drawer and slid it on carefully.

Adam’s strong arms gripped me, pulling me into his chest as he pinned me beneath him on the bed. His cock rested at my pussy, throbbing against the pulsations pushing from between my own legs.

Our eyes locked, never leaving their positions as he pushed into me with one forceful thrust. I let out a moan that could’ve awakened the whole nation, and he growled like a victorious grizzly bear.

Our bodies melted together as we both held on to one another. He didn’t move, and I didn’t dare. Our orgasms exploded into one another without friction, without any movement at all. It was simply from that feeling of finally becoming one.

Chapter Ten

Adam stayed true to his word, no longer hiding our relationship. It was never officially announced, but people were talking.

“Is it true you’re dating Quinn Hamilton?” one reporter asked during a scheduled press conference.

My heart pounded against my chest as Adam turned a soft shade of pink at the podium. “It is true that Ms. Hamilton and I have been exploring some very personal feelings for one another,” he said without hesitation.

Cameras all flashed in my direction, and reporters scrambled to be the next called upon. It was chaos as they yelled out question after question.

“Is that why you brought her with you to the White House?” one asked.

“I brought her to the White House because she is amazing at what she does,” he replied.

Reporters started directing their questions to me. I wasn’t ready. “Do you think this has helped your career?” one reporter asked.

I laughed nervously. “This was a huge risk, but one I’d take again and again if I had to,” I finally answered.

Adam smiled in my direction, his blue eyes lighting up with pride. “That’s all,” he said, and stepped away from the podium.

The press secretary took over, dodging any questions that involved the president’s personal life.

“I’m sorry about that,” Adam said as I followed him from the press room.

My hand slid into his, and I moved closer to him as we walked down the long hallway together. It felt good that everyone knew, and that there was no more worrying about when they’d finally figure it out.

We’d been out on dates, spent time together during events, but since we’d been so close before, no one seemed to really notice, or at least not enough to say something publicly.

“I’m so glad you didn’t deny it, Mr. President,” Michael said, rushing towards us in the hall.

“I am, too,” Adam said, lifting my hand to his lips for a quick kiss.

“No. Sir. You just dodged a huge bullet,” Michael said.

He pushed a book towards Adam, one that was titled “Love on the Campaign Trail, A Prediction of the Next First Lady.”

“What is this?” Adam asked, turning it over to display Sal’s face as the author.

“I told you, it always comes out, one way or another,” I said.

“I read it from front to back before bringing it to you,” Michael said.

“It has nothing derogatory about either of you; in fact, it’s quite flattering. The author is a huge supporter, apparently worked closely with you both on the campaign trail in Minnesota,” Michael added.

“Good. Then no damage control is needed,” Adam said, turning to wink at me. “We have dinner plans,” he added.

Michael let us both know the book would be on the shelves in the morning, probably sold out by noon.

“Should I step down?” I asked, feeling that this could still come back to bite one of us, or both of us, in the ass.

“No. You earned your position here,” Adam stated firmly.

“Yes. I agree,” Michael said quickly.

“Are you certain? Even if only temporarily, until this blows over?” I questioned.

Both men argued that I’d be stepping down for no reason. “You’ve proven yourself, both on the campaign trail and here in the White House,” Adam insisted.

“Yes. And this Sal guy really gives you props for how you worked your ass off for Adam,” Michael added.

“Okay,” I agreed.

The next morning, the book was released and Sal was on every talk show known to man. “Crap,” I growled, switching through the channels.

Adam stepped out of the bathroom, his toothbrush still hanging from his mouth, to see what I was growling about.

“I wanted to scream from the mountain tops that I loved you. It’s good the world knows how important you’ve been to my life,” he said quickly, and then disappeared back into the bathroom.

It wasn’t the first night I’d spent in the White House, in Adam’s personal quarters, but the exit this morning was feeling like a walk of shame.

“Hold your head up high,” Adam encouraged me, giving me a quick kiss before we started our day tackling the latest big news: our love.

The White House staff was gracious, no one offering more than a quick smile, or a nod to show approval, but the reporters were relentless.

Adam decided to schedule a conference, one that would allow only a handful of reporters, and where he and I would tell our story.

It felt awkward at first, like we were on trial as the six reporters lined up in chairs adjacent our seats.

Adam started the conversation off with how we first met, a detail I wanted left out because of my age. “Were there romantic feelings then?” one of the reporters asked, to which Adam laughed.

“I was twenty-four, Quinn was twelve. No, of course not,” he stated firmly.

One of the reporters cornered me with the same question, to which I admitted having a school girl crush on the beautiful, blue-eyed man in the Air Force uniform.

The more we talked, the more relaxed I became, actually enjoying hearing some of Adam’s answers.

I’d never heard that he had feelings for me when he left the military, coming home to find the braces gone and the little girl he’d known gone, grown into a beautiful woman. I’d never heard it, because I’d never asked.

“Why didn’t you pursue something then?” one reporter asked.

“She was in college, and had a life ahead of her that I knew may very well not include me,” he replied, smiling in my direction.

The cameras shut down, the reporters thanked us both for our candidness, and that was it. The whole story was out there. No more secrets.

Epilogue

Over three years had passed since Adam’s election, and we were working hard on his new campaign. The American people loved him, loved us, so we knew he had a great chance at a second term.

“Never take anything for granted,” he reminded me as I reassured him he’d be elected again. I poked him in the ribs and smiled. My smile turned to a look of astonishment and wonder as I saw what he did next.

He dropped to one knee, held out a black box, and slowly opened it to reveal a gorgeous diamond engagement ring.

“Quinn, I’ll never take you for granted again for as long as I live. Will you do me the honor of being my wife?” Adam asked.

Tears streamed down my cheeks as I jumped up and down, squealing like a kid at the circus. I’d dreamed of this day ever since we’d told the world about our love, but I figured it would be after re-election, and not a minute before.

“Yes!” I screamed, jumping into his arms.

The people were just as gracious about the proposal when it was announced, as they had been about our relationship. Venues were begging for us to hold our big day there, designers were sending me wedding dresses to try, and the American people were sending notes of encouragement, tips for a long and happy marriage, and even offers to help plan, execute, or clean up on our wedding day. It was overwhelming.

“I love that story,” Rowena sighed, looking at me with a pride that made me feel like our mother was in the room, in her.

My girlfriends from college were all dressed in pink dresses, ready to walk down the aisle of the little church in Minnesota. It was my mother’s church, the one she’d gone to faithfully twice a week until the day she died.

I didn’t want a big fancy wedding, or a big expensive designer gown. A guest list with hundreds of people I didn’t know just didn’t seem right to me, and Adam agreed.

“It’s just about us, our love, and sharing it with those who truly matter,” Adam said sweetly when I told him about my plans.

I couldn’t be happier, and telling the story of our courtship, our engagement, to my dearest friends whom I hadn’t seen since college, or even high school—well, that was my dream.

“So, you didn’t see Adam last night?” Lora asked, my roommate from college.

I blushed, not wanting to admit to Rowena that she hadn’t guarded me as well as she thought. “He snuck over,” I giggled.

Rowena’s eyes widened. “What do you mean he snuck over?” she asked.

The girls all giggled, and I smiled a sly—but shy—smile at my older sister. “I snuck him in the window last night,” I admitted.

She shook her head. “Figures. He can’t stand being away from you,” she sighed lovingly.

The music started playing in the church, an old organ that my mother had played for the Christmas play while the original organist played the role of Mary. It was beautifully out of tune, too loud, and exactly what I wanted to hear on this special day.

The girls all lined up, stepping out of the small room one by one to meet their groomsmen to walk down the aisle.

“Are you okay?” Rowena asked quietly.

I squeezed her hand tightly. “Yes. This is a dream come true,” I said.

“I’m sorry Mom isn’t here,” she said.

“She is,” I told her, feeling in my heart that she was around… somewhere.

Adam wore a black tux and stood at the altar like my Prince Charming, of course—but with the added effect of the Secret Service standing at each door of the church.

Rowena walked me down the aisle, gave me away, and I took my first steps toward my soon-to-be husband.

I couldn’t tell you the words, not the exact ones that the preacher used, but I can relive the feeling of love I felt in that moment every time I see Adam smile.

“Do you have any regrets?” I asked softly as the preacher announced us husband and wife.

“Only that I didn’t marry you sooner,” Adam replied, and then he pulled me in for a long, passionate kiss.

“Who cares who’s watching,” he’d told me during our rehearsal. “I’m gonna kiss you like I always do.”

We were whisked away to a secret honeymoon spot, not one I can mention. I plan to use it again, and again, having all of our yearly anniversaries there, so that secret-that one, we’re keeping.

I was officially the first lady, and with that came great responsibility, so Michael took over my position in the White House, or at least some of it. I was still the person who had the last say on anything involving Adam’s personal appearances, his wardrobe, and his social scheduling.

The people proved to like a working first lady. When election time came around, Adam won by a landslide, of course.

Going to the White House, working in politics, no, it wasn’t my dream. Or, at least I didn’t think it was, or ever could be.

Adam, yes, he was always my dream, and so by accepting my place on his campaign, it was obvious I was hoping—okay, dreaming—for romance.

I found it, and I found that dreams aren’t always what you think they are. They are what you make them.

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MR LIEUTENANT

By Ivy Jordan

This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places and incidents are products of the writer's imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locales or organizations is entirely coincidental.

Copyright © 2017 Ivy Jordan

 Chapter One

“We need a new name,” my sister said with a solemn tone. She stared up at the tattered sign above the bakery we’d both spent so much time in as a child.

“What’s wrong with the name?” I asked.

Kayla swept her dark auburn hair from her shoulder as she contemplated my suggestion.

“Everyone knows this place as Nanny’s Cupboard,” I pointed out.

Kayla sighed. “Lucy, this is our place now. We have to make it our own.”

I watched her unlock the front door. I stood at the entrance as she walked inside. It felt strange without Nanny there. I still couldn’t believe she was gone.

Kayla ran her hand along the top of the stainless steel counter. Her eyes were bright blue in the sunlight, and as she turned toward me, it was obvious she was fighting back tears. This was her place, her dream. I wasn’t sure where I fit into it. Our grandmother left the place to both of us, but in reality, Kayla was the one who belonged here.

“This is your dream, Kayla,” I said softly, ready to bow out of the inheritance given to me.

“You said you wanted to open a business here,” she argued.

“Yes, one for my organic beauty products. Not a bakery. I don’t even know how to bake,” I laughed.

She rolled her eyes, but she knew it was true. She and our grandmother spent hours in this kitchen concocting up new and exciting desserts. I loved being up front, talking to the customers, but baking wasn’t my passion.

“Why can’t we do both?” she asked.

“A bakery and a beauty supply store?” I snorted.

“Why not?” she asked.

While I was away at college, gaining a degree in education, Kayla had been here, already knowing what her goal in life was and figuring out how to make it happen. I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life until my third year into college, and unfortunately, it wasn’t in the education field. I wanted to make organic beauty supplies, using ingredients from my family farm.

I rushed home after graduation, started my own bee yard, and spent my time learning how to make scented soaps using goat’s milk and fresh herbs and flowers.

I’d worked hard on remodeling the old barn into my own studio apartment, building a greenhouse, and starting my business. Kayla had bought a house in town, just a few blocks from the bakery. She knew what she wanted. I finally knew what I wanted. How could the two dreams be combined?

“Bee-U-Tiful Bakery and Beauty,” Kayla boasted with a side smile.

“I like it,” I admitted.

My products were already branded with the Bee-U-Tiful name. My labels had a honeycomb background, and a cute bee flying over the name. But it felt as though she was selling herself short by offering me such a prominent position in the business name.

“What about, Eppes Sisters’ Creations?” I asked.

She sat down at one of the old booths. “I like it.”

“Then we can add Bee-U-Tiful Beauty Supplies, and Kayla’s Kakes on the window.” I finally started to get excited about the idea of having a storefront for my business.

“We have a lot of work to do,” she said, looking around the outdated bakery. “But she left us plenty of money to do what we need,” she added softly.

There was a savings account attached to the bakery, one that our grandmother had said we should use to make the place our own. I sighed as I remembered how hard I’d pushed her to make changes in the place. She loved it just the way it was, she’d say. But I knew now, she didn’t change anything so she could save that money to leave to us. She wanted us to be the ones who made the changes.

We spent the afternoon drawing up plans for the new building and working on ideas for marketing our new business. We decided to use a small section for my products, displaying them in the left window, while her cakes would be displayed in the right window. It was perfect, actually. I couldn’t wait to get started. 

By the time I left the bakery, my mind was swimming with excitement. I couldn’t wait to get back to the farm and start creating more products for the shelves we’d decided to buy. Kayla had all our grandmother’s original recipes, as well as the ones she’d helped her create. We decided to open the doors tomorrow morning, selling only her cakes until we were ready to remodel.

As I pulled up the long, dirt lane to my family’s farm, I noticed a strange vehicle parked next to the house. It was gold, an older model Cadillac, and once I was close enough to see the license plates reading ‘B Leive’, I knew it was my mother’s best friend Christine Collins.

Instead of rushing into my barn loft, I decided to check in the house to say hello. Christine was one of my mother’s oldest and dearest friends, and it was always a treat to see her. She spent most of her time travelling, speaking to large groups about the powers of positivity. Her influence in the field of motivational speakers was exceptionally strong, and every time she visited, she left my mom in a better place.

“Is that Christine I hear?” I called out into the empty living room.

My mother and Christine’s voices carried down the long hallway from the kitchen. “Lucy?” Christine’s voice echoed through the old farmhouse until she appeared in the doorway.

“My sweet Lucy,” she said, opening her arms to embrace me for one of her amazing hugs.

She smelled of vanilla as she pushed my nose into her shoulder. “Look at you,” she said, pulling me back to give me a once over.

“What brings you here?” I asked, blushing from her complimenting eyes.

“Well, as a matter of fact, you do, Lucy,” she said with a warm smile.

“Me?” I asked, confused as to why her visit would have anything to do with me.

“Oh, yes,” she exclaimed, gripping my hands tightly into hers.

She pulled me into the kitchen where my mother was enjoying a cup of tea. My mother smiled at me endearingly as Christine guided me into a seat at the table.

“I have news,” Christine said. “Great news,” she added.

I looked at my mother, trying to get a jump on this surprise. Annette Eppes was solid as a rock, not allowing me even a glimpse into her mind. I stared at my mother, her dyed-blonde hair making her look so much younger than Christine, with her salt and pepper locks, who was actually a year younger than my mother.

“I met someone,” Christine blurted out, taking the seat next to me.

Her eyes were locked on to mine, her expression excited, but confusing to me. “That’s great,” I said, still wondering why this had to do with me.

I chuckled under my breath as she continued to stare at me so intensely.  Her energy was intimidating, which was making me nervous. Her grip was still tight on my hands, and her eyes still blasting through me. “I’m very happy or you,” I said softly, trying to gently pull my hands from hers.

She laughed. Her laugh was boisterous, wild, and infectious. She had the kind of laugh that you’d hear from several rooms away, and even though you didn’t know what was so funny, you’d laugh too.

My hands shook loose from hers as my laughter joined with hers, still not knowing what we were laughing about.

“Not a man for me,” she sighed. “I met the perfect man—for you.”

Oh, hell!

Christine Collins was notorious for her match-making skills. I had to admit her success rate had me intrigued, but with the bakery-and-beauty store, there was just too much going on right now for a man.

“I’m flattered. But I don’t need a man,” I said sternly.

“Of course you don’t need a man. I never set up people who aren’t ready for a real relationship,” she said with an eerie seriousness.

How did Christine Collins know if I was ready or not? I barely saw her, and when I did it was only for a short visit. She’d stop and say hello, sometimes stay a day or two before she was off to a booked hall where she’d speak about love, business, or even holistic healing.

“And I’m ready?” I laughed.

Her expression tightened as she stared into my eyes. “Yes. I believe you are,” she said.

My mother sipped her tea, barely lifting her blue eyes from the cup. I wondered how much she had told Christine about my life.

“After Jimmy, we were all proud of you for moving on with your life. You’re following your dreams, you’re finally on the right path,” Christine said.

Okay. It was obvious my mother told her plenty about my life.

I sighed. I pushed my head into my hands, giving myself a moment to absorb this intrusion into my love life.

“Jimmy was a deadbeat. I get it. But I have a lot going on right now,” I argued.

Christine pulled her phone from her designer bag, thumbed through her screen, and then pushed it toward me. “This is Silas,” she said proudly.

I took the phone from her, amazed at the image on the screen. He was muscular, chiseled, and wore a military haircut. The tight t-shirt he wore looked like it would shred from his body if he sneezed, and his dark, mysterious eyes that pierced through the digital image made my knees weak.

“He’s a hottie,” I admitted.

Christine laughed.

“Oh, honey, that picture doesn’t do him justice,” she said calmly.

My interest had been piqued. I hated to admit I was that shallow, suddenly interested by the man’s looks. “Where did you meet Silas?” I asked.

She scooted her chair close to mine, gripped my arm, and smiled. “I was speaking at a business seminar, and he came up after to ask me a few questions,” she said.

I was relieved it wasn’t one of her motivational rooms filled with people looking to find love.

“He’s a first lieutenant in the US Air Force, and a pilot,” Christine boasted.

“So, what makes you think he is perfect for me?”  I asked.

She explained how she felt something when she met him, a ‘vibe,’ she called it. They talked about business briefly, but once she found out about his history, his hopes for the future, she knew instantly that he was my soulmate. I was trying to hold back my laughter from her over-the-top personality. “How do you know he is ready?” I asked.

“He is,” she said with a smirk. “He wants to open a crop-dusting business like his grandfather, so he loves the small town life. He loves animals, wants kids one day, and hasn’t found love because he’s been so busy with his military career. He did have one long relationship, just like you, but she ended up being an unmotivated gold-digger who only wanted to marry him so she could stay at home and spend his money,” she added all in one breath.

It was a lot to take in. He sounded like a genuine guy, and Christine did have an impressive record for creating perfect matches.

“I don’t know,” I stammered.

“I told him I’d give him your number, if you agreed,” she pushed.

“I’m going to be so busy with the new shop, I don’t think I’ll have time to even meet him,” I said.

“That’s no problem. He’s stationed at Sheppard’s AFB in Wichita Falls, Texas,” she said calmly.

“He’s over a thousand miles away,” I laughed.

I looked to my mother, who smiled warmly. “It’s the age of the Internet,” she offered.

“Yes. Skype is amazing for long distance relationships,” Christine said.

“I don’t know if I even want a relationship. But I do know I don’t want a long-distance relationship. How would that even work?” I asked.

I listened to my mother and her friend tell me how I shouldn’t let distance stand in my way of happiness. I didn’t even know this man, and in actuality, neither did Christine. Not really.

“He has a degree in agriculture. I doubt he’ll be planning a life-long military career,” Christine said. “Besides, when I showed him your picture, he lit up like a Christmas tree,” she added with a smile.

After some urging from both my mother and Christine, I finally agreed to at least talk to the man. Christine didn’t waste any time, swiftly grabbing her phone and texting him my number.

I didn’t even have time to absorb what was happening when Christine’s phone beeped. It was Silas, thanking her and telling her he would call me soon.

Soon? When was soon? I wasn’t ready for this.

“I have to get some work done,” I excused myself from the table.

Christine gave me one last hug before I fled from the house and secluded myself into the privacy of my barn loft.

My phone rang as I unlocked my door. The number had a nine-zero-four area code, causing my heart to race at the thought it may be Silas.

“Hello?” I answered.

“This is Silas. Is this Lucy?” a deep, sexy voice asked.

“Yes. This is her,” I said, working hard to swallow the lump in my throat.

“I received your number from Christine. I can’t talk, but wanted to introduce myself properly,” he said.

His manners were impeccable, and the tone of his voice riveting.

“I’ve heard wonderful things about you. But I have to admit, this is very strange to me,” I said.

“I understand. It’s strange for me too. But there was something about your picture that made me decide to go for it,” he said.

“Are you sure it wasn’t Christine’s persuasive personality?” I laughed.

“She can be a bit pushy, can’t she?” he chuckled.

“Oh, yes,” I admitted.

“Well, I’ll send you a picture of me so you at least know who you are talking to,” he said.

I was looking forward to having a picture on my phone, even though I’d already seen what he looked like. “Thank you,” I said.

“Can I call you later in the week, or possibly next weekend?” he asked politely.

“I would like that,” I said softly.

“You have an amazing voice, Lucy,” he said.

I giggled. His voice vibrated my entire body.

“I’ll talk to you soon, Silas,” I said, hanging up, and quickly catching my breath.

My phone beeped quickly after I hung up. It was a text from the same number. I opened it up, clicked the photo that was sent, and fell onto my bed. He was gorgeous. His dark eyes, chiseled features, and muscular body had me drooling. Why did he have to be in Texas?

Chapter Two

Business was slow at the bakery. Kayla assured me it was out of respect for our grandmother. I didn’t mind. It gave us time to clean up the bakery and make arrangements for our future remodel.

“What about shelves here?” I asked, pointing to the wall above where my counter would be.

“Perfect,” Kayla said, her face beaming with excitement.

The place smelled of vanilla and cocoa and was filled with delicious treats. I didn’t have the heart to tell her to slow down since business was so slow. I knew baking was her way of dealing with our grandmother’s death.

“So, what’s going on with this Silas guy?” she asked.

It had been almost a week since he’d called me to introduce himself. I was beginning to wonder if he’d done that just to be polite, or if maybe he was having second thoughts about taking things any further.

“He’s freakin’ hot,” I sighed, slouching into one of the booths against the wall.

“So, what do you guys talk about?” she asked.

I sighed again. “We haven’t. Not yet,” I admitted.

“I thought you’d talked to him,” she said, her voice filled with confusion.

I explained that the first contact was all I’d had. He said he would call later in the week, or possibly the weekend. “It’s Sunday,” Kayla scoffed. “The weekend’s almost over,” she added with her hand on her hip.

“I know,” I sulked.

Maybe he wasn’t going to call.

“Gunner has our sign ready,” she said, changing the topic.

“Are you serious?” I stood, the disappointment washing off of me as excitement filled my veins.

“Yup. He worked two nights straight to get it done,” she said proudly.

Gunner was always extremely helpful, especially when it came to Kayla. He’d been after her since eighth grade, and after graduation, he finally got her. Kayla seemed happier than I’d ever seen her when she was with Gunner, or even when she just talked about him. I envied her for their relationship. I wished things would come that easily to me. I had to go through pain, work hard for what I wanted, and even then, still not get it. Sigh.

“He’ll bring it over right after work,” Kayla said proudly.

My counter would be delivered sometime after lunch, and now that I had the wall measured, I could order my shelving. It was all coming together nicely.

“You girls open?” an elderly man wearing denim overalls asked as he entered the shop.

“We sure are,” Kayla said, quickly moving toward the counter to serve him.

I watched her as she helped him select a puffed pastry filled with custard from the display case, which looked amazing. Kayla had several gourmet cupcakes, decorated cookies, a specialty cake, and even doughnuts all prepared and ready for sale. If business didn’t pick up soon, we would both end up eating the left-overs, and gaining more weight than we could work off.

“You might want to slow down a little on the baking. At least until things start to pick up,” I chuckled as the old man left. “I mean, unless you want us both to get as big as a barn.”

She smirked. “You may be right.”

My counter was delivered and set up right after lunch as promised. It was beautifully simple, just like my products. I set up my smaller display cases on the counter and then cleaned out the shelves underneath. I loved how the glass front allowed me to display my products to everyone that stepped inside, and the large window near my counter would allow me to attract the ones who walked by.

“I want to be your first customer,” Kayla said, pushing her hair to her back.

She picked through my box of goat’s milk soaps, honey facial scrubs, and even my mint shampoo. I’d started a new line of products, but hadn’t had time to package them yet for sale, and I was still working on a few new items to add to my inventory. Kayla picked up the honey-mud masque I’d just packaged. “This is eighty bucks from Lindstrom,” she said, giving me a concerned look.

“I know,” I said.

“Don’t you think twenty is a little cheap?” she asked.

I shrugged. “It’s not all about money, Kayla.”

“But seriously. If this works as good…” she said, trailing off.

“It works better,” I boasted.

“I’ll take this,” she said, handing me a twenty.

I picked up the cheap black frame I’d bought at the five-and-dime store and carefully placed the twenty inside. She watched me as I proudly hung the frame behind my counter.

Gunner burst through the store’s front door with a large smile. “I’m ready to hang the sign.”

Kayla rushed to his side, squeezing her arms around his thick frame. He leaned down, kissed her on top of the head, and then pulled her toward the door. “Come check it out,” he said proudly.

I followed them out onto the sidewalk. Gunner pulled the tarp from the large metal sign. The largest portion of the sign said ‘Eppes Sisters’ Creations’ with smaller signs below that offered our brands: ‘Kayla’s Kakes’ and ‘Bee-U-Tiful Beauty Products.’ It was perfect.

“Here,” he said, reaching into the cab of his truck.

He pulled out two large pieces of cardboard, handing one to me, and one to Kayla. “What’s this?” she asked.

“It’s the stickers for your windows,” he smiled.

She jumped into his arms, kissing him on the lips as she tip-toed to reach him. “Thank you,” she said sweetly.

“Yes. Thank you, Gunner,” I said.

Kayla watched him while he and a couple buddies worked to get the sign installed. It was disheartening to watch our grandmother’s sign come down, but it was a new start. “Can I keep that sign?” I asked before they hauled it away.

Kayla smiled. Gunner loaded it into his truck. “I’ll leave it at the loft,” he said.

I wanted it as inspiration. It would be a great reminder of how my grandmother started her business with nothing but a couple recipes. It would hang in my work area, keeping me strong, and making me continue to pursue my dream.

After watching Kayla and Gunner, my heart had grown heavy. I really did want a relationship, and I was actually ready for one. I knew the man from Texas was nothing more than a pipedream. He was too far away, even if he did call, which I didn’t think he would.

My sticker was adhered to my window, and Kayla’s to hers. The large sign above was installed, and Kayla blew up balloons with a large ‘Grand Re-Opening’ sign placed in front of the store. “We’ll be busy tomorrow,” she said with a smile.

I finished cleaning up the store and left to go home. It was Sunday evening, and still no sign of Silas. “Just call him,” Kayla suggested.

“No way,” I argued.

“Why not?” she asked.

“He’s in Texas. He probably decided it was too far, and I’m thinking he’s right,” I shrugged her off.

On my drive home, all I could think about was Silas. What if he was my soulmate, my perfect match?

The old bakery sign was perched against the barn as I pulled into my parking spot. I stared it, wondering what my grandmother would have done in this situation. Would she have called him?

I knew she probably would’ve. My grandmother was fearless. She always went after what she wanted, and she usually got it. I remembered her telling the story of how she and my grandfather met. She had been on a trip after college with her girlfriends and saw him in a small shop by the sea. She’d approached him, telling him how handsome he was in his sailor’s uniform. I leaned back in my seat, just staring at that sign and thinking about how she took the chance on a boy that was a thousand miles away from home.

Inside, I turned on the lights and started my laptop. I was working on a new formula for a lip balm and a few things had to be ordered for packaging online. After that, I was going to call Silas. If my grandmother could do it, then I could, too.

I finished uploading my package design and clicked the ‘submit’ button for my order. My nerves were making it feel as though my skin was crawling. I took a deep breath and gripped my phone. I found the number from where Silas called, saved it with his name, and added the picture he sent me to his profile. I was stalling, I knew that, but I couldn’t get myself to do it. What if he didn’t want to talk to me?

My phone vibrated and rang in my hand, causing me to jump in my seat. My heart raced and my palms started to sweat as I stared at Silas’s image on my screen.

I took another deep breath and then slid my thumb across the answer button.

“Hello,” I said softly.

“Lucy, it’s Silas. Are you busy?” he asked.

 “Hey, Silas. No, I just finished up with work,” I said.

“Great. I’d love to chat, if you still want to,” he said.

“Sure. I thought you’d forgotten about me,” I admitted.

“Oh, no. I was just really busy this week. I wanted to have enough time to actually talk to you. I have to admit, I’ve been thinking about you a lot. There’s no way I could have forgotten,” he said.

“I’m glad you called,” I said.

My cheeks were burning as I spoke. His voice filled me with excitement and curiosity.

“So, what work were you finishing up? It’s pretty late there, isn’t it?” he asked.

I told him about my packaging, and the grand re-opening of the bakery and beauty store. He seemed genuinely interested, and very impressed by my use of the organic ingredients grown on my farm.

“I miss the farm,” he said calmly.

“Are you planning on staying in the military? Or, are you planning on going back home after you finish your next tour?” I asked.

“I was planning on staying in. But I would like to find a home, and from there, I’ll weigh my options,” he said.

He told me how his grandfather and dad taught him to fly when he was just a boy. They had a crop-dusting business when they were both alive, but now, it was just him, his sister, and his mother. His sister moved their mother to the city to live with her and her family, so the farm was gone, and home was something he’d have to make on his own.

I longed to tell him he had a home with me, but had to remind myself I didn’t even know this man. Talking to him made me feel as though I’d known him for years. He was so easy to share with, and such a good listener.

“Is that why you joined the Air Force, because you loved to fly?” I asked.

“My grandfather was a fighter pilot. I loved listening to his stories.” His voice drifted off into a softer tone as he continued to tell me some of the stories he’d heard as a kid.

“I just wanted to make him proud. I still feel like that’s all I want,” he said.

I loved the gentle tone of his voice. The deep, masculine tone was replaced with a softer, warmer one that made my heart melt.

My phone beeped to alert me of the low battery. I checked the time. “We’ve been talking nearly two hours,” I chuckled.

“Really?” he said, sounding as surprised as I was. “I’m sorry to keep you so long. I’m probably boring you with all the military stories,” he apologized.

“Not at all,” I said.

“I do have to get up early,” he said.

I hated to hang up. His voice had become like a soothing entity, lulling me into a calm like I’d never felt before.

“Me too,” I agreed reluctantly.

“Oh, yes. You have your grand opening in the morning,” he said cheerfully.

“Don’t remind me,” I groaned.

“You’ll do great. How about I text you when I get a chance to see how it’s going?” he asked.

“I’d like that,” I replied.

“I’ve really enjoyed talking to you, Lucy. Would it be strange if I asked you out on a date?” he asked.

I giggled. He was a thousand miles away, so it was a strange question to me. “That’s a long drive for a date. Would we meet half way?” I laughed.

“We could Skype,” he suggested.

“I’ve never used it,” I admitted.

“Well, would you?” he asked.

“I would,” I replied.

“Saturday night?” he asked.

“Yes,” I said.

“Great. It’s a date,” he boasted.

I hung up and fell back into my favorite orange chair. My fingers caressed the arms, rubbing the velvety fabric against my skin. I was tingling all over, my heart was racing, and for what it was worth, I was really looking forward to our date next weekend.

Silas and I had a lot in common, that much Christine got right. But he was still a thousand miles away, so I wasn’t sure how this would all work. All I knew was my face hurt from smiling so much, and I had butterflies in my stomach. It was worth a try.

Chapter Three

The grand re-opening day at the bakery and beauty store was a huge success. The entire town came out to show support, and by the end of the day I was sold out of everything I’d brought in.

“Wow,” Kayla said, sliding into one of the booths.

I turned the sign to ‘closed’ on the door and locked it before joining her.

“I can’t believe we were that busy today,” I said.

The shelves I ordered were delivered and still sitting in a pile by my counter. I’d planned on having a slow moment so I could install them, but it never slowed down.

Kayla smiled and looked up toward the ceiling. “We have grandma to thank for that,” she laughed.

“I’m sure she was watching,” I agreed.

“Did you find a place for the old sign?” she asked.

“No. I was up late talking to Silas,” I admitted.

“Oh, he called? How did that go?” she pushed for details.

I told her how sweet he was, and how much we had in common. She stared at me with a warm smile as I gushed about how much I really liked him.

He’d sent a text earlier that day asking how everything was going. All I could manage to type back was ‘extremely busy’ and I hadn’t heard from him since. I hoped he didn’t think I was blowing him off.

“So, have you guys made plans to meet?” she asked.

I shrugged and shook my head. “We are having a video date this weekend though.” I chuckled, feeling embarrassed by the entire situation.

Kayla assured me that video dating was nothing to be embarrassed about. “Lots of people are meeting online. It gives you a hell of a better range of people,” she laughed.

I thought about that. Out town wasn’t exactly tiny, but it was pretty small when you considered the eligible men in the area. I worked a lot, and spent most of my free time on the farm, so meeting someone would be limited to whoever came into the store.

There wasn’t anyone in the town that I found interesting enough to date. Even if I did find someone, chances are they would know my ex, Jimmy, and for me, that was just awkward.

“Maybe you’re right,” I admitted.

The rest of the week, the store continued to stay busy. I had plenty of orders for products that I’d run out of stock on, and Kayla was up to her knees in cake batter for special orders.

Silas had texted me every day until Thursday, and called a couple times late at night before bed. He said he had a big assignment to get ready for, and that he would probably not be around much to talk until our date.

I was becoming accustomed to his ‘good morning, beautiful’ texts, and hearing the sound of his voice before lying my head down at night.

Friday was rough, and Saturday even rougher. I wanted to hear from him, even just a quick hello, or a text to say hi. Kayla pushed for me to text him, but I didn’t. “He told me he was going to be really busy,” I defended.

A part of me knew if he was able to find a minute to say hello, he would. I didn’t want to bother him. His job was important, and I couldn’t even begin to imagine the dangers he faced each day. I wanted him to be ready for whatever this big assignment was.

“Big date tonight,” Kayla teased playfully.

I was absolutely exhausted from the week, and even though I was excited about finally getting to talk to Silas face to face, I was afraid I would be a drag.

I smiled. My nerves were starting to go wild. I’d never talked through video before. What if I looked stupid?

“You’ll be fine,” Kayla assured me.

I knew my anxiousness was shining through, but I tried my best to believe her.

“I’ll lock up. You go on home and get ready,” she insisted.

Get ready? Shit. I hadn’t thought of that. What was I going to wear? Should I dress up?

I didn’t hesitate to take Kayla up on her offer. I blew her a kiss and rushed out the front door. “Where’s the fire?” a familiar voice asked.

I turned to see Jimmy, my ex, standing on the sidewalk in front of the store. “Is this your shop now?” he asked, pointing up to the sign.

“Yes,” I replied, pushing my key into the lock on my car door.

“You’re in an awful hurry. Hot date?” he asked.

I smiled, and probably blushed. “Oh, wow. It’s about time some man snatched you up,” he laughed.

There wasn’t any way in hell I was going to explain my situation to Jimmy, of all people. “You still look good, Juicy Lucy,” he smirked in my direction.

I smiled and slid into my car. He was so crude at times. I hated that nickname, and he knew it. He was immature, and always would be. I needed a real man. A man like Silas, with hopes and dreams.

I plugged my laptop in as soon as I got home and put my phone on the charger. I ransacked my bedroom closet looking for something sexy enough to show through the video. I didn’t want to look slutty, but sexy. Since I hadn’t spent any time running the clubs with my friends in college, and my time since had been spent mostly on the farm, I didn’t really have anything that fit into either category.

I settled on a blue blouse that my mother bought me. I’d never worn it before, but I remembered how she raved about it bringing out my green eyes next to my auburn hair.

My body tingled as I undressed, like the nerves were pinching at my skin from excitement. I turned on the shower, stepped inside, and let the water tickle my skin, like tiny fingers all over my body.

What was I thinking? What was I doing? This was crazy. I kept telling myself he was a thousand miles away, and I’d probably never even get to meet him face to face. It wasn’t like he could just leave the military base, and with my new business, I couldn’t exactly afford to just take off whenever I wanted. Ugh!

My nipples hardened against the water as I thought about his deep, dark eyes. That body, my God, that damn body of his. I let my head fall back against my shoulders and felt the warm water rush along my neck and down my chest. I thought about the ripples in his chest, and the powerful mounds of muscles that pushed out from his shirt sleeves.

I let my hand slowly caress my body, rolling gently to my belly. My fingers stretched out, reaching through the tight curls above my swollen flesh to my engorged clit. I pinched the delicate flesh between two fingers, squeezing it gently as I worked my hand up and down to create friction.

I tugged softly on my clit, pulling it away from my body as my fingers clamped around it. I could feel the pulsations starting, slowly at first, then faster and harder as I continued.

My legs trembled beneath me, causing me to grip the side of the shower wall with my free hand. The water teased my hard nipples while my mind tortured me with thoughts of Silas’s hard body pressed against mine.

I opened my legs, giving my fingers the reach needed to feel my juices flowing from my pussy. My eyes opened. I felt dizzy, but satisfied. The water rushed down my body, cleansing me from the excitement I’d stirred between my legs. I pressed both hands against the shower wall, calmed my breathing, and slowly opened my eyes to the reality of being alone.

Silas said he’d text me before he called on Skype. It was already six thirty, and we were scheduled for seven. I slipped into the blue blouse, leaving it unbuttoned enough to show off some of my cleavage, but not too much. My hair fell softly past my shoulders, cascading down my back as I blew it dry, and after a quick shake, a couple brush strokes, and another shake, it looked perfect.

Kayla told me not to wear too much makeup, not that I ever did. She was afraid the video would make me look gaudy and made me promise to only use lipstick and mascara.

I smudged some foundation under my eyes, just to make sure my circles from lack of sleep wouldn’t show through, and then applied the little bit of makeup Kayla suggested.

This was it, seven o’clock. My first video date.

I opened my laptop and signed into the Skype account I created earlier that week. I pulled my phone from the charger, sat it next to me on the couch, and placed my laptop on the coffee table.

I had a bag of shrimp, a bunch of fresh cilantro, and a large baguette of French bread ready for our dinner we planned to cook together. My stomach was growling, but I was nervous to cook, and then eat, over a computer screen with a man I barely knew, and had never met.

My body relaxed onto the couch, waiting for him to call. After seven passed, I felt my eyes growing heavy from the hard day at work, and my mind settled on the fact that he may not call at all.

I reached for my throw blanket, snuggled up on the couch, and decided to go to sleep without dinner, and without Silas.

My phone vibrated next to me as soon as I found my comfort zone on the couch. It was Silas.

Silas: Sorry I’m late. You still want to have our date?

I looked at the time. He was a little over thirty minutes late, but I was certain he had a good excuse.

Me: Yes. I’m ready.

Almost as soon as I hit send, the laptop sounded with a ring, and his Skype name and picture appeared on my screen.

I sat up, wiped my eyes, and clicked ‘answer.’ His face was dark, making it hard to really see him. “Hey there,” he said in that sexy, deep voice.

“Hey. I can barely see you,” I said, moving my screen to adjust the glare.

“How about now?” he asked. Suddenly the screen brightened, and his face was crystal clear.

“Yes. That’s perfect,” I replied.

“Can you see me?” I asked.

“I can. You look beautiful. But you look like you were sleeping,” he laughed. “I’m sorry. Did you need to get some sleep?”

“No. I’d rather talk to you,” I admitted.

“Good,” he chuckled.

“I feel weird doing this,” I said softly.

“Why?”

“I’ve never done anything like this,” I said quickly.

He paused, but I could see him smiling. I was waiting for him to say he hadn’t either, but he didn’t.

“Have you?” I finally asked.

He laughed. “Yes. A couple times,” he admitted.

“Really?” my interest piqued.

“Well, I am in the military. Not exactly a lot of women here, and not many around here close,” he explained.

“Texas is a huge state. There are no women around you?” I asked.

I hoped he hadn’t detected the twinge of jealousy and disbelief in my voice as I spoke.

“I guess there are plenty of women around. I just rarely leave base, and the women I’ve met haven’t exactly been what I’m looking for,” he said.

“What are you looking for?” I asked.

He laughed. It was obvious I was making him a little nervous, or possibly even uncomfortable.

“I’m not looking for anything. My grandpa always said the only time you’d find love is when you’re not looking,” he joked.

“Mine too,” I said, remembering those same exact words from my grandfather when I was a teenager and thought I’d die without a homecoming date.

“Wise men,” he said. “So, to clear up the answer to that question, I’m not looking, but I’m certainly ready and open to finding that perfect someone.”

That was exactly how I felt in the moment. I was young, just turning twenty-five, there was no rush for me to fall in love and start a family. But I knew I wanted love, but only from that perfect someone. I’d know when I found it, or at least my grandpa told me I would.

“You hungry?” he asked, his tone perking up.

“Yes! I’m starving,” I said, rubbing my belly.

“What are you making?” he asked.

“Shrimp scampi over linguini,” I said proudly.

I wasn’t much of a cook, never had much interest in learning. But shrimp scampi was my favorite dish, and probably the only one I could execute without staring at a cookbook.

“Wow, impressive,” he said.

“What about you?” I asked.

“I’m making steak,” he boasted.

I could see the large, sliding-glass door behind him, and a wooden deck beyond that. A small, round grill sat outside the door, and as he opened the door, he laughed, asking if I could smell that sweet smell of charcoal.

I carried the laptop into the kitchen, adjusting the screen so he could see me while I prepped and cooked. “I have something for you,” he said, pulling a bouquet of full, red roses into the screen.

“They are beautiful,” I gushed.

“I wish I could actually give them to you. But I’ll keep them for you for now.”

“Thank you,” I said.

I drizzled a pan with olive oil while Silas salted his steak. His muscles flexed as he shook the shaker, and when he twisted the pepper mill, they popped beneath his tight, tan skin. “You like to cook?” he asked.

I shrugged and shook my head with a laugh.

“That’s okay. I love to cook,” he said with a wink.

I chopped garlic and put it into my hot oil and then squeezed lime juice all over the shrimp. It was weird, watching him as he moved about his apartment. He seemed a little nervous, but that somehow made me calmer. He said he’d done this once or twice before, so this wasn’t new to him like it was me. At least he wasn’t so comfortable that I’d think he done this every night with a new woman.

“So, you’d cook for me?” I asked.

“Every night for the rest of your life,” he smiled.

“Wow!”

“Wow, indeed! There aren’t many men like me left, Lucy,” he teased.

I could believe that. I knew for a fact there weren’t any like him in my small, Minnesota town.

“I love your accent, by the way,” he said.

I blushed, realizing I must sound wild compared to what he’s used to in Texas. He didn’t have much of a Southern drawl. His voice was too deep to carry much of a twang. It was masculine, sexy, but if I had to say where he lived using only his voice, I’d be at a loss. Me? There was no way anyone wouldn’t be able to pinpoint my origin using only my voice.

“I hate it,” I admitted.

He shook his head and pointed his finger at the screen. “You can’t hate it if I love it.”

My shrimp sizzled in the pan while I opened the package of fresh pasta and turned the oven to broil for my bread. I minced garlic into a tub of butter, and then smeared it all over the bread. Silas was whistling while he placed his steak on the grill, a TV theme song that was familiar, but I couldn’t name. Something about him soothed me, made me feel comfortable, and made me want more.

“How do you like your steak?” he asked.

“Medium rare,” I answered quickly.

“Good girl,” he winked, flipping the thick cut of filet to its other side on the grill.

I pushed my bread into the oven, under the broiler, and then flipped my shrimp before adding the pasta and butter into the oil. I chopped the cilantro while Silas tossed a salad, and then quickly removed his steak from the grill to rest.

He asked me a random series of questions while he waited for me to finish my meal. One of the questions—have you ever been in a serious relationship—made me cringe.

I wasn’t sure I wanted to tell him about Jimmy, but I knew I didn’t want to hide anything from him. He listened, didn’t judge me, and told me he understood. “Sometimes, no matter how you feel about someone, if it isn’t right, it isn’t right,” he said.

I agreed. It was tough letting go of Jimmy. I told him I knew he wasn’t going anywhere, but he was still at least a comfort to me. He was always there, and the one day when he wasn’t anymore, I’d felt like I made the worst mistake of my life. But now, I knew I’d made the right choice, and being alone wasn’t so bad. It was certainly better than being with someone you didn’t belong with.

“You’re a very wise woman, Lucy,” he said sweetly.

I tossed the pasta with the shrimp to coat it with the scampi sauce. I pulled my bread from the oven, and set the table with my laptop in the center. It was strange at first, this video dating thing. But after talking, and making a meal together, it didn’t seem strange at all.

Silas was on my screen in front of me, almost as if he were across the table on an actual date.

“This actually feels like a real date,” I boasted.

“Anything’s possible, thanks to the Internet,” he laughed.

“Well, not anything,” I teased, my mind drifting to a more intimate kind of date.

“Oh, you’d be surprised,” he boasted, cutting into the steak.

“Really?” I asked, my interest piqued, and my jealousy starting to show.

“Not that I’ve done anything like that,” he said, his face turning red, and his lips curling into a mischievous smile.

“Oh, yeah, like I’m gonna believe that smirk,” I laughed.

He pushed his fork toward the screen, showing me how perfectly his steak was cooked. I knew he was changing the topic, and in a way, I was glad, although, my curiosity was still piqued. What had he done on here? And with who?

“That looks delicious,” I said, allowing him to change topic without an argument.

“I’d love to try your scampi,” he said.

“Here,” I teased, pushing my fork toward the screen.

He pretended to take a bite, laughing at his own silliness. This was nice. This was actually the best date I’d ever been on.

After dinner, we talked while I snuggled on the couch. We were both watching Dancing with the Stars and critiquing their routines when my eyes started to get droopy again. I yawned, covering my mouth, but he caught it.

“You need sleep,” he insisted.

He was right. But I wasn’t ready for this date to end.

“I do. I’m gonna do something I’ve never done on a first date before,” I said curiously.

“What’s that?”

“I’m gonna take you to bed with me,” I said softly.

His eyes widened, and that smile melted my soul. I wished he could snuggle in next to me, not just through a computer screen, but flesh to flesh.

“I’m honored,” he said.

“So, I know you’ve done so much on here and all, but don’t get any ideas,” I teased.

“I’ll keep my hands to myself,” he promised.

I carried the laptop into my bedroom and set it on the dresser. “I’m turning you around while I get undressed,” I said quickly.

I heard him let out a whistle as I slid out of my jeans. My skin tingled just knowing he was there with me, even though he couldn’t see. There was something erotic about having him on my dresser while standing in my panties and bra behind him.

“Not even a peek?” he teased.

For a moment, I had the urge to walk past the screen, giving him a glimpse of my half-nude body. “No way,” I said, quickly sliding into my short sleep shorts, and tight tank top. I slid my bra off, leaving my nipples hard and visible against the thin material.

“Okay. I’m ready for bed,” I announced, turning the screen back toward me.

“I have to admit, that was kinda hot,” he said.

My pussy was still aching, and my nipples felt as though they would burst. Yes, it was.

I climbed into bed, placing my laptop beside me. Silas and I talked until I couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer. “I would’ve tried to kiss you,” he said softly.

“I would’ve let you,” I admitted.

“I would love to do this again soon, Lucy,” he said.

When he said my name, my entire body reacted with excitement.

“My twenty-fifth birthday is this Thursday,” I said.

“I’ll have to do something special,” he replied.

Chapter Four

The rain slammed down hard, crashing into my windshield faster than the wipers could keep up. I parked in front of the shop, running fast to the front doors with my jacket over my head. “Forget your umbrella?” Kayla laughed.

I knew I was a mess. My hair was soaked, my shirt was clinging to me, and I could feel my makeup sliding down my face as I hit the dry air of the shop.

I shrugged it off, grabbed a towel, and dried myself off. “I hope it doesn’t do this on my birthday again,” I growled.

Every year since I could remember, my birthday was filled with rain. It was never just a drizzle, or even a partly rainy day; it would storm from the time I woke up until the time I went to bed.

Kayla laughed, knowing that my birthday was cursed with bad weather. My mother had always told me it was a rainy night when I was born, probably one of the worst she’d ever seen. Ugh!

“What do you care? You’ll just be all snuggled up with your computer boyfriend,” she teased.

My cheeks burnt red as my embarrassment grew. I’d not thought of Silas as a ‘boyfriend’ before that moment. I realized I liked thinking of him in that way, minus the computer part.

She pushed for details about our relationship as I started to unpack the shelving stacked next to my counter. It was obviously going to be a slow day, so it was perfect for installing the shelves, and talking about Silas.

I knew there was no hiding the fact I liked him, especially to Kayla. “He’s amazing,” I admitted, sighing after I spoke.

I told her about the date, and how sweet he had been. My mother had already grilled me for details, probably to send back to Christine. I had to admit, she was good. He was perfect, with the huge exception of being so far away.

“Do you think you want to meet him?” she asked.

I set the shelf down onto the floor and paused for a moment. I knew I liked him, like a lot. But if I met him, and fell for him, then what? “I dunno.”

“I thought you really liked him?” she asked, surprised by my answer.

“I do,” I replied. “I just don’t know if this is even a possible relationship,” I admitted.

Kayla sighed, rolled her eyes, and then started cleaning her countertop.

My phone rang with Silas’s face lit up on my screen. Seeing his smiling image instantly gave me goosebumps. Kayla giggled as I slid the phone to answer.

“Hello,” I said cheerfully.

“Hey gorgeous,” he said, his tone just as cheerful as mine. “I’ve got some news.”

There was urgency in his voice as he spoke. The hairs on my arm stood at attention while I waited to hear what this ‘news’ could be—good or bad.

“I’m being deployed to Turkey for nine months,” he said quickly.

“When?” I asked, my mood quickly turning sour.

“I leave in ninety days,” he answered.

My heart sank. Turkey? So, he was going even further away?

“Wow,” is all I managed to get out before someone called for his attention.

“I have to run. I’ll call you later, I promise. Prepare to stay up past midnight. I plan to be the first one to wish you happy birthday,” he said charmingly.

“You promise?” I asked, fighting back the lump in my throat.

“I promise, gorgeous,” he said.

“I wish you could tell me in person,” I said softly.

“That would be the perfect send-off for me, baby,” he replied, and then hung up. 

“What’s wrong?” Kayla asked, watching me slump back into the booth seat.

I told her the news he’d just given me, and how he sounded excited. It felt as though my heart had just been ripped from my chest. “That’s… what? Five thousand miles away, at least?” I asked, a tear falling from my eye.

“It’s only nine months,” Kayla said, moving toward me to offer some comfort.

“I was stupid for even getting involved with him,” I said, wiping the tear from my cheek.

I wasn’t going to cry over this man. I’d never even met him, and now it sounded as if I never would.

“Lucy, don’t give up on him yet,” she whispered, her hand caressing my back.

“I just don’t see how we could build a relationship like this. Across the globe, doing Lord only knows what, there won’t be time for video dating, and certainly no way to see him in person,” I laughed nervously as I spoke.

“You don’t know that,” she insisted.

“If I don’t meet him before he leaves, then I don’t see the point in continuing this while he’s overseas,” I scoffed.

“Why not?” Kayla asked.

“Because. You don’t know if you have chemistry—I mean real chemistry—with someone until you meet them in person. Why spend almost a year of my life getting attached to someone that I may not even like when I meet?” I snarled.

“I don’t think that’s true. Chemistry is chemistry, whether in person or over the computer screen,” she pushed.

I wanted to believe her. “I don’t know. I’ve never dated anyone over the computer before,” I laughed.

“Well, there’s a first time for everything,” she smiled.

I nodded, trying to convince myself that this was somehow, going to be okay.

“You have good chemistry when you’re on the phone or the computer, right?” she asked.

I nodded.

“And I saw how you lit up when he called, so you like him, right?” she pushed.

I nodded.

“Seems to me, you two have a lot in common, and having chemistry without meeting is a lot harder than having it with someone in front of you,” she barked.

“Maybe,” I replied.

“A relationship has to start somewhere. This might all work out; just wait and see. It’s not like you’re in a rush to find someone; you weren’t even looking, so relax, and just enjoy this,” she suggested.

Everything she said was true. And I did like Silas, a lot. I didn’t realize just how much I liked him until he told me he was going away. I’d be lying if I didn’t admit it hurt like hell thinking I’d lose him forever. I just truly didn’t see how this could work with him across the world.

Chapter Five

I was still reeling with what to do about Silas. Our midnight phone conversation was sweet, and even though I voiced my concerns about him leaving before we even met, he filled me with the same hopelessly romantic reassurance as Kayla had earlier that day. Why was he so perfect?

“Happy Birthday, dear Lucy, Happy Birthday to you!” my mom and sister sang in unison, although not in tune.

I closed my eyes and blew out the candles, making the only wish I wanted to come true.

“How’s it feel to be half way to fifty?” Kayla teased.

“Don’t know yet. You’ve had two years to deal with it, what does it feel like?” I teased back.

“After you get past the grey hairs sneaking up on ya, it’s not so bad,” she laughed.

My mouth fell open in disbelief. Grey hairs? No, thank you!

“I’m teasing,” Kayla said.

“We have mom’s genes. We’ll never go grey,” she patted our mother’s dyed-blonde hair.

“Yeah, not as long as we color it every month,” I laughed.

Annette rolled her eyes and began slicing the cake. “Next year I can tell you what it’s like to actually be fifty,” she scoffed.

My phone beeped, causing me to jump to check the text. Mom and Kayla laughed at my anxiousness and enthusiasm as I unlocked my phone to read Silas’s message.

Silas: Hope you’re having an amazing day gorgeous…

Me: At mom’s having cake. Wanna know my birthday wish?

Silas: If you tell me, or anyone, it won’t come true….

Me: I’m sure it isn’t anyway

Silas: Enjoy your family. I’ll see ya later 

I stuffed my phone back into my purse. I was excited to see Silas on our scheduled video date, but my heart ached that he couldn’t be here.

Kayla poured me a glass of wine. “Was that Silas?”

My smile widened across my face as I lifted my glass to my lips. The wine was sweet, but not nearly as sweet as Silas.

“You two seem to be hitting it off,” My mother said sweetly.

“Yes. But I don’t know what’ll happen once he leaves,” I sulked.

Mom leaned back in her chair to look toward the front door. She seemed distracted by something. “Are you expecting someone?” I asked.

“Christine said she might stop by,” she said quickly.

Her tone was strangely curious, and filled with an anxiousness I couldn’t quite pinpoint. “So, what’s your big birthday plan?” my mother asked.

“Silas has a video date planned. He said he has a special surprise for me,” I replied.

Kayla was beaming. I couldn’t help but wonder if she’d had a few glasses of wine before I’d arrived.

“I wonder what it is,” Kayla gushed, her eyes batting as fast as my heart beat.

“I don’t have any idea,” I admitted.

I tried pulling it out of him several times that day with no luck. He was closed-lipped, and wasn’t willing to give up any details, not even a single hint.

Mom leaned back again, checking the front door.

“Does Christine want to check up on her love project?” I laughed.

“I guess so,” Mom replied.

Kayla lifted a piece of the sliced cake and placed it on my plate. She proceeded to repeat her actions until she and our mother each had a piece in front of them. “So, what did you wish for?” she asked curiously.

I sighed. “I can’t tell you,” I scoffed.

“Oh, so it’s something you think might come true?” she asked, her eyebrows lifting high on her forehead.

“Maybe,” I said, knowing in my heart it was impossible. I’d wished for Silas to be here, spending my day with me.

“Look at that,” Mom said, leaning back into her chair one more time.

I stood from my chair and looked toward the front door. The rain stopped. It was the first birthday I remembered without rain. “Wow,” I exclaimed, making out the gold shine of Christine’s car coming up the lane.

“Christine made it,” I announced, moving back to my seat.

“Is that what you wished for? No rain?” Kayla teased.

I shrugged my shoulders and shoved a piece of cake into my mouth. “Can’t tell ya.”

Mom got up and rushed toward the door. I heard Christine’s voice, loud and boisterous echoing through the hall. “Where’s my birthday girl?” she called out.

“I’m in here,” I announced, shoving another piece of cake into my mouth.

I washed it down with wine and then was face to face with the woman who set me up with the perfect man whom I’d probably never get to meet.

“Happy birthday!” she screeched, moving past Kayla with her arms wide open.

The strong scent of vanilla perfume took over, quickly filling my mouth with the flavor that mocked the cake I’d just eaten. Her tight squeeze was like a boa constrictor around my neck.

“I have a surprise for you,” she said with a wink.

“You didn’t have to do anything,” I replied.

She backed away, moved back out of the kitchen, and I could hear my mother and her whispering. I looked to Kayla, who was sipping her wine calmly. I knew she had to know what was going on, but she wouldn’t make eye contact with me, even when I kicked her under the table.

Mom entered the kitchen first, and then Christine. I was looking for a box, an envelope, or for whatever this big surprise was, but her hands were empty. “I know I set you up with someone who was too far away. And I know you’re worried that you’ll never meet him once he leaves for Turkey,” she said calmly.

I didn’t speak. I was mortified, fearing that she’d brought me another man as a consolation prize.

“If you’ve brought me a man, you better send him right back away from here,” I groaned.

My mother’s bright-blue eyes were filled with laughter, even though her facial expression was quick to cover her amusement. Christine lifted one eyebrow, then bit her bottom lip into her mouth. “Are you sure?” she asked.

“Oh my God!” I exclaimed, scooting back from the table, and standing from my chair.

She really did! She brought me a man!

“I’m going home,” I said, working my way toward the back door.

“Wishes do come true,” a deep, sexy voice sounded behind me. It was familiar, one I’d heard many times. One I’d grown to love to hear.

I turned, my heart racing fast in my chest. My palms grew as hot as my cheeks, and my eyes welled with tears of joy, and disbelief.

My arms opened and I rushed toward Silas, who now stood in my kitchen. It was exactly what I wished for, and there he was. “Oh my God!” I screeched as I finally felt the warmth of his embrace.

His lips pushed against my neck as I snuggled my nose into his. The tightness of his squeeze left me feeling safe and secure. His scent was soothing, slightly seductive, and reminded me of a cologne my father used to wear.

“You’re really here?” I questioned, pulling away and staring into his beautiful dark eyes.

“There’s no other place I’d rather be, gorgeous,” he whispered. “Happy birthday.”

My hands reached up to his face, feeling his skin, tracing his lips with my fingers, and convincing me that he was truly here.

He reached behind him, pulling out a beautiful bouquet of roses, very similar to the ones he’d given me on our first date. “You deserve to keep the flowers,” he said sweetly.

Christine was grinning from ear to ear. “I couldn’t believe you were going to run out the back door,” she laughed.

“I thought you were bringing me another man,” I explained. “You knew?” I asked, looking at my mother’s soft and gentle eyes.

“Yes. Silas called me to plan the visit,” she said softly.

Kayla was tearing up from the romance of the situation no doubt. “You too?” I asked my sister who quickly nodded. “You are a very sneaky man,” I said to Silas.

He winked. “When I have to be.”

“Have some wine,” Kayla quickly grabbed a glass and handed it to Silas. She poured the glass, staring at him like a lost puppy that’d just found its owner. Christine started explaining how they’d pulled the heist off without my knowing. Apparently, she’d picked Silas up at the airport, and he would be staying until he was deployed.

“You’ll be here for ninety days?” I asked.

“Give or take,” he said.

I was in awe. I couldn’t believe he was really here, and that he’d be here for three months.

“You’d expressed concerns about not meeting before I deployed. I couldn’t imagine leaving knowing that you were giving up on us,” he said.

“I just didn’t want to spend a year of my life with someone I’d never met,” I explained.

“I understand that,” he said, winking in my direction.

“So, Silas, what are you planning to do while in town?” my mom asked.

I immediately blushed at the question, figuring the answer was me, me, me, do me, Silas.

“I booked a hotel up the road. I figured I’d spend as much time getting to know Lucy as possible… as long as I don’t get in her way, that is,” he said, grinning in my direction.

I felt a sigh lift from my chest and escape my lips. I couldn’t imagine Silas getting in my way.

Christine started asking about his deployment, causing Silas to get excited. He told us how he’d be joining the 2ndAir Force Command, and while there he’d be working on top-secret weaponry. It sounded dangerous, and even though his mood was wildly excited, mine was quickly growing wretched.

“You two must have a million things to talk about,” my mother said, graciously cutting Christine from asking any more questions.

“Yes, ma’am,” Silas said politely, reaching for my hand under the table.

“We’ll clean up in here. You two go, get to know each other,” my mom said, her tone pushy but good-natured.

Kayla’s face was washed with love as she smiled. I leaned over, kissed her cheek, and whispered, “This is a good start.”

I took Silas’s hand and led him toward the front door. We walked out onto the front porch and took a seat on the bench swing. “I still can’t believe you’re here,” I said, staring at him like he was an alien.

“There’s something I’ve been dying to do,” he said, leaning in softly toward me. His lips met mine, causing sparks of electricity to shoot throughout my body.

Instantly, I melted into him, my lips parting, and my tongue entangling with his.

He pulled back slowly, releasing his grip on my mouth. I heard his lips smack as they pulled from mine, but my eyes wouldn’t open. I was melted, absolutely melted into my spot.

His soft laughter brought me out of the trance he’d placed me in. I opened my eyes to see his locked onto me. His lips were curled into a smile while his eyes danced in my direction. “That was nice,” I mumbled, still working on pulling myself together.

“Yes it was,” he said, his voice deep and vibrant.

“I don’t think you should stay in a hotel,” I insisted.

“I couldn’t impose,” he said politely.

“Even if you sleep on the couch,” I said quickly. “I can’t imagine having to give you up after just getting you here. Besides, you’re my birthday present, after all.”

He pulled me close to him, pushing me into his chest as he laughed. “That’s true.”

“Besides, you’ve been drinking,” I teased.

“One glass of wine?” he scoffed. “Yes. You’re right. It would be unsafe for me to be on the roads, even as a passenger,” he laughed.

I snuggled into his chest, feeling the warmth of his body, and listening to the beat of his heart. It was fast. He was nervous, or excited, scared, or all of the above. I loved it. This big tough soldier was nervous sitting next to little me.

“I think we have company,” he said, looking over his shoulder into the window behind us.

I turned to see Kayla, Mom, and Christine, all staring out the window. I laughed.

“Why don’t I get you settled in?” I said.

“Sounds like a brilliant idea,” he agreed, standing and offering his hand to me.

Chapter Six

I leaned in the front door and yelled to Christine to pop her trunk. My mom winked at me as I took Silas’s hand. He grabbed his bags from her trunk, and I led him to my barn loft apartment. “So, you really do live in a barn?” he asked with a chuckle.

“I do,” I replied.

“I thought you were joking,” he said, pulling me in close as I opened the front door. “Wow. This is amazing,” he said, looking around the remodeled space.

It still looked like a barn, but after remodeling, it was more like a fancy loft that someone paid thousands to make look like a barn, instead of the other way around.

“I love it,” I said, feeling his hands grip at my waist.

He pulled me into him, his hands working slowly to my belly, and stopping just below my breasts. My nipples reacted by tightening and pushing at the material of my shirt. Heat rolled between my legs in waves as my back pressed against his tight, hard chest. The heat of his breath against my neck made my legs tremble, and the vibrations of his voice shot through my veins as he spoke.

“All I’ve been able to think about is holding you,” he whispered.

After hearing his voice each night, there were plenty of things I’d been thinking about him doing to me, and plenty more I’d thought about doing to him.

He spun me around in his arms. He lowered his head to let his lips meet mine. They were soft and gentle, but his hands squeezing at my waist were aggressive, and hungry. I loved the teasing, but it had been too long since I’d been with a man. My body was craving more than just teasing; it wanted more. It wanted it all.

I melted into his arms, letting his hands caress my back while my tongue pushed into his mouth. His taste was sweet, like the wine we’d just drunk. I could feel my fourth glass settling in, leaving me tipsy in his arms, and lightheaded from the excitement of the night’s turn of events.

I stumbled, falling back toward the couch. Silas caught me, and smiled as he lowered me to my back. He sat on the edge of the couch near my feet, gently rubbing my legs as I calmed down. “You okay?” he asked.

“Yes. I just got a little lightheaded,” I admitted.

“From me or the alcohol?” he asked.

I smiled, opened my legs, and let his hand slide up my thigh. Each stroke he grew closer to my center. My body was arching, my lips parting, and when he finally slid under my skirt, letting his fingers graze my panties, I moaned with pleasure.

“You are absolutely gorgeous,” he whispered, his fingers slowly making their way into my panties.

My eyes were locked onto his as he pushed a single digit into my tight pussy. I was already wet, not sloppy, but obviously excited. The sensation of having him inside of me sent my body into wild quivering mess. He pushed slowly, in and out, watching me as I squirmed beneath him.

He pulled his finger from the warmth I’d offered so freely, leaving me feeling empty, and my clit aching. His finger lifted to his lips, slowly sliding in between them as he sucked my juices from his own flesh. I pulsated with arousal at the sight of him tasting me.

“You’re sweet,” he said softly.

His hands pushed up my legs, sliding my skirt above my hips. My panties were damp against my skin, clinging to me as he ran a finger across the silk. “Can I take these off?” he asked.

“Yes,” I gasped.

One swift motion, my ass lifted from the couch and my panties were on the floor. His eyes remained on mine, even though my legs were spread open, and my most precious flower unfolded for his pleasure. I wanted him to look at me, to see me, to want me. The longer he looked into my eyes, the more I ached for him to look at my body, exposed, vulnerable, ready.

He slid his hands up my shirt, pushing it over my head. I helped him remove it, and then unlatched my bra, sliding my arms out of the straps without his prompting. His eyes lowered to my breasts, and then slowly to between my legs.

A soft sigh escaped his lips as he took me in. “Gorgeous,” he whispered, lowering his mouth to my breast.

His mouth was warm and soothing as it covered my full breast. Tiny flicks of his tongue teased my nipple, and then he quickly sucked it into his mouth and tugged gently with his teeth. I let out a moan, my body pushed toward his mouth as he released, begging for more.

“I want to taste every inch of you,” he said softly, lowering his mouth to my other breast.

He offered the same treatment, teasing me to the point my hand slid down my belly and in between my legs.

My pussy was wet, sticky, and so very warm as my fingers slid between my plump lips. Silas lifted up, leaned back, and watched as I worked my fingers back and forth against my clit.

“Fuck, that’s hot,” he gasped, scooting down on the couch to allow his mouth to kiss my thigh.

His tongue lapped at my fingers as they sunk deep into my pussy. He gripped my clit between his lips, sucking it into his mouth. He gently tugged it away from my body as my hips rocked toward his mouth.

My entire being shook with pleasure as he worked my clit between his lips, slowly massaging it, gently tugging, and then sucking hard to make me squeal. It felt as though I was going to pass out, everything went black for a second, and my body filled with electricity.

I tightened my legs against my hand, slowly sliding my fingers from their warm hole. Silas wasn’t letting up from his playful teasing of my clit, causing my body to quiver with arousal. His eyes lifted to mine, staring deep into my soul as he sucked my pink flesh into his mouth. I reached down, gripped his shaven head, and let out a moan that had to be heard at least two miles away.

His mouth slowly released its tight grip on my clit, and then his tongue offered a few laps to the juices that flowed between my legs. Each lap made me jump, my leg quivering like a dog getting petted in that sweet spot they loved.

I calmed myself, taking deep breaths, and pushing Silas’s mouth away from my overly sensitive skin. “Let’s go to bed,” I gasped.

His eyes were filled with a strange mixture of fear and excitement.

“Are you sure?” he asked. “I don’t want to rush you. I’ll be here awhile,” he insisted.

“I’m sure,” I said, not wanting to overthink things.

“Technically, this is our third date,” I laughed.

The fear left Silas’s eyes, leaving only the hunger. He stood, scooped me up into his strong arms, and carried me in the direction I pointed.

His mouth pushed onto mine, his tongue sending shivers of excitement through my body as it entangled mine. I could taste my juices on him, sweet and similar to the wine.

He tossed me on the bed, causing me to bounce and laugh. He stripped out of his tight t-shirt, and stood at the edge of the bed, just staring at my body.

My eyes watched his hands move to his belt. He unfastened it, and then unzipped, releasing a large bulge of flesh beneath his blue boxer briefs.

My body ached to see the cock it would soon experience. He’d already made me come, and still, I hadn’t even seen him.

“You’re certain you want this?” he asked softly.

“Yes,” I gasped.

I’d never wanted anything so badly in my entire life.

He pushed the denim past his hips, and then onto the floor. He shuffled his feet to remove his shoes, and then tossed the jeans aside.

My eyes were glued to the bulge in his briefs, waiting hungrily for it to be released.

I crawled on all fours toward him, unable to contain my excitement any longer. My hands gripped the material that hid what I desired, and pulled it down, and away from his flesh.

A pile of flesh fell free from the release. His cock was hard, long, and thicker than any I’d ever seen. My mouth watered as I reached for it, holding the warm flesh in my hand. I stroked him slowly, looking up to watch his reaction. My mouth lowered to the head, sucking on it softly while my hand squeezed and stroked the shaft.

My free hand reached to his ass cheeks. They felt like two large boulders beneath my hand. I pulled him toward me, pushing my mouth onto his cock, taking it in deep into my throat.

He growled, and then gasped for air as I sucked hard, rolling my tongue along the large vein in his cock.

His hands gripped my shoulders, pulling me from his manhood, and gently pushing me onto my back on the bed.

My legs opened as his hand slid up my thigh. His fingers teased my aching flesh, spreading my plump pussy lips apart, and slowly entering my warm hole.

I arched my back, reached for him, and pulled his mouth toward mine. “I want you,” I gasped.

He reached down onto the floor, leaving me empty and eager. He fumbled with a package, something I couldn’t see until the condom was being pushed onto his hard dick.

I pulled him onto me, his arms pinning me to the mattress on either side of my head. His eyes pierced through me, penetrating my soul as his cock rested at my entrance.

“I don’t want you to think this is what I came for,” he whispered.

I shook my head. “I don’t,” I replied softly. “I don’t want to waste one minute with you,” I gasped as he slowly pushed himself into my body.

My hips spread, my legs opened wide, and my pussy gripped at his flesh, pulling him in further with each thrust. My breathing was wild, my heart racing, and my body quivering from the sheer size of what just penetrated me. I was so full, so satisfied.

That soft, deep growl that rolled from Silas’s lips sent vibrations through my body. The soft, deep thrusts sent his cock against my G-spot, causing me to lose control. No man had ever touched that spot. It was once only reachable with the special vibrator I bought at a sorority party in college. My nails dug into his back, my hips rocked without rhythm against him, and my jaw began to quiver as my orgasm released and rolling, thunderous moans filled the room.

Silas gripped me tightly, pulling me into his chest and pushing his lips onto mine as his cock started to throb and swell inside of me. My body relaxed, instantly melting into the mattress once he let out one last growl, and then fell to my side. He slid the condom from his penis, dropped it into the trash bin by the bed, and scooped me into his arms.

“I wish I didn’t have to ever leave,” he whispered.

“Me too,” I agreed.

I knew my eyes were about to well up with tears, and I didn’t want to ruin the mood. I pushed my face into his hard chest and snuggled my body into his. I couldn’t stand the thought of him leaving, but I knew he would, in ninety days, give or take.

Chapter Seven

It had been an entire week since Silas had arrived, and I was still floating on cloud nine. He worked around the farm while I was at work, helping my mom with chores, and finishing up projects I hadn’t had time to do myself.

“So, things with Silas are pretty good?” Kayla asked as she locked up the shop.

“They couldn’t be better,” I replied.

Every time I thought about how great things were going, I got a lump in my throat that I couldn’t swallow.

“Mom said he’s been really helpful,” she smiled.

I nodded.

I knew my mom missed having a man around the farm. Since Dad had passed, we’d had help, but never anyone long-term. She’d thought she could handle it all on her own, but as she grew older, the work grew harder.

“He finished my office,” I boasted. “Grandma’s old sign is on the wall overlooking my desk. It’s perfect. He’s perfect.” 

“You say that like that’s a bad thing,” she laughed.

“It is,” I groaned.

I knew everything being so perfect, him being so perfect, was just going to make it harder when he left. It was going to be even harder if he didn’t come back.

Kayla patted me on the back and offered up a warm smile. I knew she understood. We’d talked about my fears of getting too close to Silas. She couldn’t do anything, except comfort me. She knew my fears were legitimate.

Silas was in the greenhouse when I arrived home. “Hey, you,” I said, sneaking up behind him.

He turned, gripped me around the waist, and pulled me into his chest. “Damn, I’ve missed you,” he growled.

I giggled as he kissed my neck. His grip tightened around my waist and my feet left the ground as he lifted me onto the potting table.

“What have you been doing in here?” I asked, wrapping my arms loosely around his broad shoulders.

“Working on a scent for your men’s line,” he answered.

“Really?” I asked, shocked that he was taking such an interest in my work.

“Yeah,” he said proudly.

“What did you come up with?” I asked.

“Well. I like the lavender and mint. The citrus and melon isn’t bad either,” he said.

I stared into his eyes, watching them dance as he spoke.

My heart swelled in my chest. I knew I was falling for this man.

“Are you listening to me?” he laughed.

I wasn’t. He had been talking about the combinations he’d tried, and all I could do was stare into those beautifully mysterious eyes.

I leaned in, kissing him gently on the lips, letting my body fall into his and my mind fall blank of any doubt, worry, or fear.

His hands grew aggressive, sliding down the back of my shorts. “You’re gonna make my plants blush,” I teased.

He growled playfully, biting at my neck as he pulled me in closer. “I’m hungry.”

I giggled. “Well, let’s go make dinner,” I said, sliding from the table and into his arms.

Silas kept good on his promise to cook for me, preparing steaks, lasagna, and even a chicken parmesan that was so good I woke up in the middle of the night to eat the leftovers.

Tonight, he had shrimp on the counter and a package of fresh pasta. It was the dinner I’d made on our first video date. “You don’t have to cook. I just want you to show me how to make it,” he said sweetly.

Cooking with Silas was much more fun than cooking alone. “I could get used to this,” I said as we finished our meal, and cleared the table.

“That’s what I’m hoping for,” he grinned, leaning in to kiss my cheek.

“That’s just cruel. You’ll make me miserable when you leave,” I teased.

“I’ll be back,” he whispered in my ear.

“I hope so,” I admitted, kissing his neck softly.

“I need a shower,” he groaned, pulling at my waist.

“It’s all yours,” I replied.

“Come with me,” he insisted, sucking my earlobe into his mouth.

I giggled from the tickle, squirmed in his arms, and pulled away.

“I have to get some stuff packaged,” I apologized, shoving my bottom lip out to pout.

“Baby,” he groaned, grinding his body into mine.

I could feel the hardness in his jeans pressing into me. My body fell limp in his arms at the thought of him making love to me. “I can’t,” I argued, pulling back from the trance he was putting me into. “Even with your help tonight, I still won’t get it all done,” I explained.

“I understand,” he whispered, and left me with a gentle kiss on the lips.

I loaded the last plate into the dishwasher and grabbed my phone from the counter. Silas left his phone on the table, and as I moved toward it, it lit up.

My heart raced as I reached for it, opening the screen to see a beautiful blonde’s picture next to a text that simply read, “Hey, Lover.”

Her name was Brenda. The beautiful blonde woman that Silas was obviously seeing was named Brenda.

It felt like a vise had been placed on my heart, squeezing it so tightly that it was ready to burst. Who was she? Lover? They obviously were sleeping together. How could I’ve been so stupid?

I sat down on the couch, holding Silas’s phone in my hands. A part of me wanted to go through it, reading texts, checking e-mails, and looking at his saved pictures. But the other part, the rational part, said to stop.

I placed the phone on the coffee table and waited for the shower to stop. When the water shut off, my heart ached. How was I going to approach this?

Silas came out into the living room, a towel loosely wrapped around his chiseled waist. He leaned over, smelling of the mint shampoo I’d made, and kissed me on the neck.

“You okay, babe?” he asked after I didn’t react to his kiss.

“You missed a text,” I told him.

He walked around to the front of the couch and picked up his phone. His ass looked like two boulders shoved into that towel. Damn, he was hot. Stop it, Lucy. He’s a liar, a cheat. He’s not hot.

His face grew concerned when he read the text that came through while he was in the shower. “Who’s Brenda?” I asked calmly.

I was fighting back tears as I waited for his response.

“I dated her,” he said, taking the seat next to me.

“I didn’t mean to look at your phone. I didn’t snoop, even though that text made me want to. It just lit up,” I explained.

“It’s okay. I have nothing to hide from you, Lucy,” he said.

“She called you ‘lover.’ Are you still dating her?” I asked.

“No. I haven’t talked to her in a couple weeks,” he said.

The tears I fought to keep back fell from my eyes and down my cheeks. “A couple weeks ago?” I asked, realizing that was when we were supposedly dating.

“Yes,” he said softly.

“So, you were dating her when you met me?” I asked.

“Yes,” he said. “I swear I ended it when I found out how much I liked you, which was almost instantly.”

“If you ended it, why is she texting you, and calling you lover?” I demanded.

Silas wiped the tears streaming down my face. “I swear to you, I ended it. She wasn’t exactly stable. I should’ve ended it sooner, before I even met you, but I was lonely. I was stupid,” he said.

“You promise?” I asked.

“Yes. You can look on my phone if you want. I sent her texts two weeks ago telling her I met someone, and that we were done,” he insisted. “I have nothing to hide. I promise you that.”

Something about Silas made me believe him. He was an honorable man, not a liar or a cheat. It wasn’t my business what he was doing before me, and why should he have ended it with her just because we talked once or twice on the phone?

“I’m sorry,” I said, wiping the rest of my tears from my face.

“No. Don’t be. I’m sorry. I should’ve told you. It just wasn’t date talk, ya know?” he chuckled nervously. “We never got much time to talk, and I didn’t want to spend it talking about anyone else but us,” he added with a smile. He leaned over, kissing me on the cheek. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“I didn’t mean to overreact,” I replied with a soft chuckle.

“So, what do you want, Lucy?”

I paused. I knew what I wanted. I wanted him. I wanted him to not leave, and to stay here forever. This last week was perfect, and I couldn’t bear the thought of losing him.

My heart was attached. I’d fallen for this man. I still wasn’t sure I could handle the distance, not only for the nine months, but possibly for years if he decided to stay in the military. I couldn’t uproot my life, and he couldn’t uproot his. I had to face the possibility of this not having a future.

“I don’t know,” I lied.

I could see the disappointment in his eyes. I wanted to throw my arms around him and tell him that wasn’t the truth. I wanted to tell him what I really wanted, and that it was him, just him.

Chapter Eight

I leaned against my counter, watching Silas interact with the customers. He was so easygoing that it was impossible not to like him.

After nearly two weeks, we’d grown extremely close, and the more I looked at him, the more I realized, there was no way I could let him leave without telling him how I really felt about him, about us.

“Thank you for your service,” Mrs. White said, smiling at Silas like he was a giant lollipop.

He leaned down, kissed her hand, and made her blush as he told her it was his honor.

He’d spent almost an hour talking to Mr. Gentry about the war, and another hour with Mr. Tillis talking about planes. He seemed to fit in so perfectly, not just with my family, with me, but with my entire life.

“Can you grab the large bag of flour in the kitchen for Kayla,” I asked him once he was finally free.

“Sure thing, gorgeous.”

Kayla grinned as she watched me, watch him walk into the back. “You’re in love,” she teased.

I blushed instantly. My hand waved in her direction to shush her before he heard. I couldn’t deny it. It was true.

“Oh God, here comes Jimmy,” Kayla said, frowning in my direction.

He strutted through the front door like he owned the place with a huge grin on his face. “Hey, Juicy Lucy,” he called out just as Silas made his way from the back.

“Hey, Jimmy,” I said, rolling my eyes.

“I need something to make my junk smell good,” he said with a laugh.

“That’s impossible,” Kayla joked.

Silas gripped my arm as I started to walk to my counter. “Who’s that?” he asked.

“My ex. He’s an idiot, but harmless,” I insisted.

He loosened his grip and I walked over to my counter. Jimmy was picking up each product, sniffing it carefully, and then setting it back down. “It needs to be strong,” he laughed.

“Jimmy, none of this stuff is made for your junk,” I groaned.

“You remember what my junk smells like, right?” he asked.

I didn’t want to answer that. I looked to Silas, who was already looking disturbed. I offered a nervous smile and then turned back to Jimmy. I’d told Silas about him, about how crude and immature he was. It didn’t bother me so much, but knowing it was irritating Silas was hard to swallow.

“If you don’t remember, I can give ya a whiff, for old times’ sake,” Jimmy laughed.

A hand slammed down on the counter, hard and forcefully. The eagle tattoo on the wrist made it clear it was Silas’s without having to look up.

“You need to take your disrespectful mouth somewhere else before it gets smashed in, son,” Silas scorned.

“Woah. When did you get a rent-a-sailor for the shop?” Jimmy chuckled.

Silas’s chest puffed out, and his breathing picked up pace. I watched his nostrils flaring, and his eyes turning black, and I knew he was about to blow. “Silas!” I called out.

He glared at me and then turned his attention back to Jimmy. “What’s it gonna be?” he demanded.

“Jimmy, just—please leave,” I pleaded.

He smirked in my direction. “I’ll go. But only because you asked me too, Juicy Lucy,”

A couple little old ladies that were at Kayla’s counter walked out when Silas slammed his fist down. I was embarrassed, and infuriated. “Why did you cause a scene?” I asked as Jimmy left the store.

“He was being rude and disrespectful to you,” Silas demanded.

“I can handle him. You ran off customers with your outburst,” I scorned.

Silas huffed and took in a deep breath. “Wow. Okay, so it’s fine for someone to ask you to smell their junk?” he laughed angrily.

“Of course not, but you were being ridiculous,” I scoffed.

“Yeah. Whatever,” he laughed, and pulled away from my grip.

I watched him storm out of the shop, my heart breaking knowing he was angry and hurt.

“Why don’t you go after him?” Kayla suggested.

“I think I better let him cool off,” I replied.

Two hours passed and we were locking up. I still hadn’t seen Silas, and even though I sent a text, it wasn’t responded to.

“Good luck,” Kayla said as she waved to me getting in my car.

I felt that annoying lump in my throat as I pulled onto my long, dirt lane. Silas’s rental car was parked by my loft, but the trunk was popped open.

My heart sank deep into my chest as I parked beside his car. I peeked into the trunk as I walked toward my loft; one of his large canvas bags was already packed inside. I rushed inside to find Silas stuffing his last suitcase. He jerked the case sideways, zipping it with a swift motion. “You’re leaving?” I asked.

“I’m going to the hotel,” he snapped. “I think we need some time apart.”

He stood there, suitcase in hand, his eyes dark and unforgiving, and his lips tight. I watched his fist clench around the handle of his suitcase. It was obvious he was still fuming about Jimmy, and about me. Maybe I could’ve handled it differently, but it was my business. I’d never had anyone swoop in to rescue me. I was always able to handle my own conflicts. Why did it infuriate me so badly that Silas wanted to protect me?

I just stood there, speechless. I knew I needed to say something, but I wasn’t sure what. “You’re not going back home, are you?” I asked.

“I don’t have a home. But no. I’m not going back to work,” he snarled.

It had felt like home since Silas had been here. It was the best two weeks of my life. I knew this was what I wanted, that he was what I wanted. But he was so mad, I knew now wasn’t the time to tell him.

“Everything’s just been moving so fast,” he said calmly.

That was one thing I could agree with. Things were moving fast, lightning fast.

“I know what I want, Lucy. You’re the one who doesn’t,” he said softly.

My heart swelled in my chest. It felt like this was the moment. I was ready to tell him how I truly felt, how I’ve always felt.

“And I know what I don’t want. I don’t want a woman who allows another man to disrespect her in front of me,” he snapped.

And the moment was gone.

“I didn’t want to be here when you got back. I just came to get my things,” he said.

“Silas, wait,” I said, reaching for his arm as he passed me.

“I don’t wanna do this now, Lucy,” he said, pushing past me and out the front door.

I held myself together until I heard the door slam. My tears fell violently down my cheeks, sobs shook my chest, and my heart felt as though it would explode from the pain.

What just happened? Did Silas just break up with me?

Chapter Nine

I barely slept, and all day at work, Kayla kept pushing for details about Silas and me. I didn’t have any. He hadn’t called, he didn’t respond to my text, and even though I expected to see him at the shop that day, he didn’t show.

“Are you okay?” Kayla asked as we closed for the day.

I nodded, fighting back my tears.

“Why don’t you go to him? Tell him how you really feel?” she suggested.

I knew if I’d only told him when he asked the first time, none of this would be happening.

“What if he doesn’t want to see me?” I asked.

“Then he doesn’t want to see you. But you have to at least try,” she urged.

I hugged my sister and rushed to my car. The hotel wasn’t far from the bakery, so I decided to go straight there instead of going home first.

Silas’s rental car was parked in the front parking lot. My heart calmed a bit knowing he hadn’t left town. Inside, the clerk was impossible, refusing to give me Silas’s room number. “I can call,” she said with a smirk.

“Fine,” I agreed. “Tell him it’s his home.”

She gave me a strange look and then picked up the phone. I heard her telling Silas that ‘his home’ was here. “Okay, sir,” she said quickly, and hung up.

Her eyes were distant and empty as she chomped on her gum. “Well?” I asked, feeling impatient.

“Room 109,” she said.

Before she could give me directions, I rushed away from the counter and down a long corridor lined with red doors. I found his room, knocked, and felt my nerves unravel as I waited for him to open the door.

I heard him on the other side of the door, sounding like he was scooting something heavy. The door opened, I leapt into his arms without saying a word. I just needed to feel him, to have him hold me.

His arms tightened around me, his head rested on mine, and I heard him let out a long, deep, sigh.

I pulled back, staring up into his dark eyes. “You’re what I want. You’re what I’ve always wanted,” I admitted.

His eyes glossed over with wetness, but not a single tear dropped. His lips tightened, but I could see them begin to quiver as he obviously fought back the rush of emotion.

“Are you sure?” he asked.

“I’ve never been surer of anything in my life,” I said sternly.

“I love you, Lucy,” he said softly, kissing me on the forehead.

My heart felt as though it exploded in my chest from the overload of emotion surging through me. “I love you too, Silas,” I sobbed.

His strong arms scooped me up from my feet and carried me into the hotel room. The heavy door slammed shut behind me as he moved toward the bed. My mouth reached for his, stretching my neck until our lips finally met. His taste was so delicious, so missed, my tongue worked diligently to sop up every ounce of his flavor.

He gently placed me on the bed, his eyes penetrating me fiercely as my body began to ache for his touch. He undressed, slowly, letting me take in every ripple in his chest, every line in his form. He held his cock, stroking it slowly, and then slid on a condom before lowering to his knees at the end of the bed. He gripped my ankles, pulling my ass to the edge and closer to his mouth. I fell back, unable to control the arousal that rolled through my body like thunder. My back arched as he slipped my skirt above my hips and my panties to my ankles.

My eyes were closed, waiting for the sensation of his touch. His tongue pressed flat against my pussy, lapping my flesh with slow, steady strokes. Moans escaped my throat, my hands reached for his head, gripping it, guiding it to keep the same rhythm.

My knees tightened around him, pressing into his ears as his tongue pushed deep inside of me. I lifted up, rocking my hips toward him as he sucked on my flesh, enjoying the juices he aroused from me. “I love you,” I whispered.

“I love you,” he said softly, lifting his mouth from my sweet spot. His eyes penetrated me, filled with emotion and hunger.

He stood, showing off his large erection as he leaned forward to grip my shirt. His strong hands lifted it from my body, over my head, and into the floor without effort. My eyes locked onto his as he carefully removed my bra. His movements were so sensual, so loving, my body responded with electric tingles, goosebumps, and a gentle quivering.

His hands slowly slid down my sides, stopping at my hips. He gripped my flesh tightly and pulled it toward him. My legs wrapped around his waist as he lowered himself at the edge of the bed. My arms locked around his neck as he lifted me from the bed and onto his erection. The weight of my body pushed him deep into my pussy as loud moans filled the room.

My back pressed against the wall as Silas pushed into me. His growls were intoxicating, his strength powerful and impressive. The palm of his hands rested on my ass cheeks, pushing them upward, and then letting them drop slowly back down onto his long cock.

Waves of pleasure began rolling through my body as my clit swelled against his pelvis. My eyes locked to his, and with my body shaking, my pussy throbbing, and my bottom lip quivering, I came in his arms.

He lowered me to the bed, mounted me gently, and leaned in, kissing me softly on the mouth.

My body was still recovering from the powerful orgasm it’d just received when he began to throb inside of me. Another swell of waves rolled through, causing my eyes to close, my legs to fall open, and my body to interact only with his. His cock slid in and out, slowly, and deep. My skin was so sensitive that every stroke sent me into a trance-like state of satisfaction.

His body tightened. His arms flexed around me, and his legs pushed his hips further into mine. I reached around his muscular body, my hands resting on his hard ass as it clenched from the ecstasy shooting through his veins.

“I’m home,” he said softly, pulling me into him as he rolled to his side.

Chapter Ten

Time flew by. Silas and I spent most of our time in bed, while Kayla handled the store. I cried a lot, feeling the pain of him leaving even before it happened, but I knew we had two weeks before we had to say goodbye, and I planned to make the best of every second.

“What if we don’t survive the distance?” I asked, snuggled under his arm with my head on his chest.

His hand moved to my face, brushing the long, auburn locks away from my brow. “What if we do?” he asked.

I smiled. I loved that he was so positive.

“There’s no one else in the world I would want more to be waiting for me when I get home,” he said softly.

I sighed, letting the warm air of my breath tickle the hairs on his chest. He squirmed, I giggled, and he quickly pounced onto me, pinning me to the mattress.

“Let’s get a shower, and go have lunch,” he said cheerfully.

I stretched upward, pushing my lips into his. I could taste the mixture of our juices on his tongue from our love making.

He jumped up, pulling away from my kiss. His body was so delicious. I hated to get out of bed. “Do we have to?” I pouted.

“Woman, you’re gonna kill me,” he laughed.

He extended his hand to me and pulled me from the bed as I took it. He gripped my ass cheeks tightly, guiding me into the bathroom as he kissed on the back of my neck.

The shower washed away my tears so he couldn’t see them as he gently washed me with my pink loofah. I was going to miss him so badly. It tore my heart out just thinking about our time being up soon.

“How will we see each other when you get back?” I asked.

“This is home. I’ll work, and then I’ll come home,” he said, making it sound so simple.

It wasn’t like a nine-to-five job. He would be at work for months at a time, and only home for a few days in between. “We’ll figure it out,” he whispered softly.

My hands roamed through the mounds of muscles on his body, exploring every inch. I wanted to memorize his form, suck in his scent so it would last a lifetime, and stare into his eyes so intensely that I could imprint my love onto his soul.

He slapped my ass as I stepped out of the shower, causing me to jump. “No fussing to get ready; you’re beautiful just the way you are,” he insisted.

I stood, cocking my hip to the side and placing my hand on my waist. “So, I should go like this?” I teased.

He stepped out of the shower, gripped my hips, and pulled me in close. “Yes,” he growled.

“I think I may have a problem getting served,” I laughed.

“Oh, baby. There’s no one in their right mind that wouldn’t serve you,” he said.

His phone rang in the bedroom, echoing through the loft like a warning siren of impending doom. My heart sank, knowing he hadn’t received any contact since he’d been there, with the exception of Brenda’s text.

He looked distressed as he rushed from the bathroom and toward the sound. I wrapped a towel around me and entered the room carefully, hoping to hear who the mystery caller was on the other end of his phone.

“Yes, sir. I’ll be there. No. Not a problem at all, sir. Thank you, sir,” he said in a very military-style tone.

“Who was that?” I asked, already knowing it was work related.

His face was pale, his eyes filled with sadness and worry, and with every second I looked at him, my heart broke.

“The mission’s been pushed up. I leave for Turkey Tuesday morning. I have to leave today to get back and prepped.”

My knees weakened beneath me, and I felt as though I’d faint right there. I managed to keep my legs sturdy, and my mind focused as I took in his words.

He quickly moved toward me, wrapping me in his arms. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered.

“It’s not your fault. It’s a noble sacrifice,” I sulked. “I just don’t know if I can handle this,” I added.

“You can,” he assured me.

“You’ll always be leaving,” I gasped.

“But I’ll always be coming home,” he replied.

His hand stroked the hair from my face and wiped the single tear that escaped my eye.

“We can do this,” he said.

I looked up into his eyes. I knew we could. There was no one on this earth that I’d rather be waiting for. He was worth it. We were worth it.

“Okay. Let’s get you packed,” I said, trying my best to be diplomatic.

He winked at me, and then leaned in and kissed me softly on the cheek before grabbing his phone to make the flight arrangements.

The only flight available leaving Minnesota and landing in Wichita Falls, Texas that day was for four o’clock, giving us barely time to get packed and to the airport. Maybe it was best that we didn’t have time to say a long goodbye.

Silas packed his clothes while I gathered anything that belonged to him around the loft. I bagged up the body wash, the lip balm, and the shampoo that he’d helped me to create for my men’s line, and shoved it in his suitcase.

Silas pushed my back into the side of the car for a long passionate kiss in the airport drop-off lane. People stared at us as we embraced each other so tightly that it hurt. Some were envious, while others looked disgusted by our public display of affection. I didn’t care.

“I’ll be home soon,” Silas said, grabbing his bags and rushing into the airport.

“I’ll be waiting,” I promised.

I watched him disappear into the crowd and then got back in my car. I stopped in the parking lot before leaving, watching the planes take off. I know I sat there over an hour, watching each one, wondering if it was his.

There hadn’t been time for goodbyes, so he’d made me promise to apologize to Kayla and my mom. I knew as soon as I saw them, I would fall apart. They would have to be my support system now, keeping me strong until Silas came home.

Epilogue

The construction was almost complete on my new greenhouse. I walked around, checking on my plants while the workers hammered away around me. Business was booming, especially since taking my products online. I already had several orders to fill for a large retail group, and Silas had been looking for a manufacturer to handle my larger packaging orders.

I loved the free time my new success had given me. I was able to travel to Texas and stay with Silas at times he couldn’t make it home. The ability to work online had changed the entire dynamic of our relationship, but I still yearned for a normal, day-to-day relationship.

I pinched off a piece of mint and held it to my nose. The scent always made me think of Silas, and how sweet he was to help with the men’s line of products. It had been two years since we’d met, two years since I launched the men’s line with his favorite scents. Both things were booming: our relationship, and the men’s line.

Damn, I missed him.

I’d just gotten back from Texas a few days ago, but it felt like an eternity. I knew there was too much to handle here for me to leave again anytime soon, and Silas wasn’t promised another leave for at least two months. There were still moments, ones just like this one, where I wondered if I could continue this, if I could handle this.

“When you feel like you’re slipping, call me, gorgeous,” is what Silas always said to me.

Sometimes, he couldn’t pick up his phone, but hearing his voice on the voicemail was usually enough to hold me together. I needed that now. I pulled my phone from my pocket and dialed his number.

I heard it ring, but then echo. I pulled the phone from my ear, listening to the distinct ringtone of Silas’s phone coming from outside my greenhouse.

My heart raced as I rushed through the doors. Silas stood there, smiling, with his phone in hand.

“You really know how to ruin a guy’s surprise,” he teased.

I jumped into his arms. My mouth pressed against his, my tongue exploring the taste I’d so desperately missed. “What are you doing here?” I asked.

He gripped my wrists and gently pried my arms from around his neck. “Funny you should ask,” he said with an awkward grin.

He backed away from me, lowering to one knee. My hands covered my mouth to stop the rush of explosions that tried to escape my throat. My eyes welled up with tears as he pulled out a black velvet ring box. “Lucy Eppes, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?” he asked with a shaky voice.

I loved that he was nervous. I loved that a strong, powerful man like Silas was still nervous around little ole me.

I wanted to scream out YES! But my mind began reeling with worry. I was struggling enough having a long distance boyfriend. I didn’t want a long distance husband. We’d talked about marriage, but it was always thought to happen after he left the military, or at least settled somewhere closer to home.

He smiled nervously up at me. I knew my hesitance was driving him insane.

“How will this work?” I asked softly, not wanting to spoil the mood, but searching for the answers I needed.

“I’ve just transferred to St. Paul Joint Air Reserve Station. I’ll have a steady position, and unless called upon by emergency or necessity, I’ll be home,” he said proudly.

Tears fell down my cheeks, burning my flesh and blurring my vision.

“It’s only a short drive. So, I can be home every night,” he grinned.

“YES!” I blurted out.

My hands gripped his arms, pulling him up from the ground. I jumped into his arms, kissing him fast and furiously on the cheeks, the neck, and the lips. I couldn’t imagine being any happier than I was in that very moment.

“I didn’t want to tell you until I was sure,” he said.

“How long has it been since you asked for the transfer?” I asked.

He looked at me with a curious look. His lips curled into a smile, a crooked one like he gets when he’s being mischievous or sneaky.

“I requested the transfer the day I arrived back in Texas. After our first two weeks together.”

“Before the Turkey deployment?” I asked surprised.

He nodded.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” I asked.

“I didn’t want to disappoint you if they said no. It’s never a guarantee,” he said.

“You missed me as badly as I missed you,” I teased.

“Of course I did!” he exclaimed, pulling me into his warm chest.

“I never wanted you to feel that pain again. That look in your eyes the day I left early, it was more than I could bear,” he said.

“I put on a brave face,” I insisted.

I remembered that day. I cried outside the airport, but I stayed calm for his sake. I knew it was just as hard, if not harder, for him to leave. I still got to stay at home, knowing everything there would be the same every day. He was the one who had to leave home, wondering if it was still there to come home to when he got back.

He pushed his finger into my chest, circling the area of my heart.

“I appreciated that so much,” he said softly. “But I could feel your heart breaking,” he added.

“Can you feel my heart now?” I asked smiling up at him.

He pressed his palm against my chest, tightened his lips, and acted as though he was trying to listen for something.

“I hear it,” he said softly.

“What does it say?” I asked with a giggle.

“It wants to go to bed,” he said, tilting his head to the side.

I laughed. “Yes. That’s exactly what it’s saying.”

Silas took the ring from the velvet box and carefully slid it onto my finger. My entire body was consumed with goosebumps as he leaned in and gave me our first kiss as an engaged couple. “I love you, Lucy,” he whispered.

“I love you,” I replied, kissing his cheek gently.

His strong arms quickly scooped me up, lifting me from my feet. I let out a squeal with excitement as my hands wrapped around his thick neck. He carried me into the loft, tossing me onto the bed.

“Now, to consummating this engagement,” he laughed, stripping out of his tight shirt.

My entire body quivered as I took in his amazing form. Not only was he perfect on the outside, but he was perfect on the inside as well. This was going to be my husband. Mrs. Lucy Myers. I love the sound of that.

Click here to get my book Mr. Billionaire for FREE

MR FIREFIGHTER

By Ivy Jordan

This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places and incidents are products of the writer's imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locales or organizations is entirely coincidental.

Copyright © 2017 Ivy Jordan

 Chapter One

I was beginning to think I didn’t belong in this town.

The small room where I would audition for the leading role in an independent film was filled with typical L.A. women. It felt as though every eye was on me when I entered, like they were wondering why I was there. I was beginning to wonder the same thing.

“Name and role,” the lady at the desk asked as I approached. She didn’t even bother to look up as she scribbled down my name next to the role of Lucinda, the abused housewife that kills her husband.

I took a seat next to one of the Barbie look-alikes, and re-read the part I planned to use in my audition.

The only jobs I’d managed to snag since moving to this town were two commercial roles, a few print ads, and a nobody role in a cheesy, low-budget play. I needed this part. I needed something. Otherwise, I was heading right back to Lydick, Indiana to work in my grandfather’s hardware store. I couldn’t go back. Not after promising to be somebody. That look of disappointment in my father’s eyes when I turned down the scholarship to Notre Dame still haunted me at night. When I called home, I could still hear the pain in his voice.

One after one, the blonde Barbies all took their turns in the casting room. My anxiety started to take hold of me as the room started to clear out. I stroked my long brown hair nervously. I was next. Deep breaths, inhale….exhale... “Emily Warren,” the woman at the desk called out. She pushed her glasses up on her nose as her head lifted to scan the room for the one belonging to the name she’d just called.

“Here,” I said nervously.

“This isn’t attendance. Go on inside,” she said, sarcasm oozing from her tongue.

Her lips curled into a half smile as she lightly shook her head. I knew that look. I’d had it given to me time and time again. It was the look that said, “You’re different. You don’t belong.”

I’d been on dozens of auditions, but they never seemed to get any easier. “Hello,” I said, clearing the lump of nerves from my throat as I entered the small room.

The heavy door shut behind me, slamming and causing me to jump. “Sorry,” I apologized to the three uninterested faces behind the long desk that sat against the far right wall in the room.

“Emily Warren?” the woman in the middle of two men asked. Her hair was pulled into a tight bun, and her eyes were narrowed and small.

“Yes,” I said quickly, moving to my spot in the center of the room.

“You are auditioning for Lucinda?” the woman asked, then looked to her left, and then to her right.

The two men on either side of her didn’t seem to notice her glance. It was obvious she felt I wasn’t right for the part, but I had to push through.

“Yes,” I announced with a cheerful smile.

“Do you need someone to read with you?” the man on the left asked.

He was older, but handsome. His bald head was shiny, creating a small glare that I couldn’t seem to quit staring at. “No,” I said, pulling my eyes away from his head.

“Go ahead whenever you’re ready,” he said, offering the slightest hint of a smile behind the thick coat of his beard.

“I’ll be reading the speech Lucinda gives the cops,” I stated.

They all nodded and then turned to the page in the script that matched my audition.

Tamara, one of my three roommates, had taught me how to cry on demand. I read the speech, pleading with the cops to believe I didn’t mean to hurt my husband, even though fifteen bullets had been found in both his chest and back. A tear rolled down my cheek, which I slowly wiped away, and then let my head fall into my hands in dismay.

It felt good. Real good. “Thank you,” the woman in the middle stated without emotion.

I hated casting agents. They never showed any emotion. You had to leave the audition not knowing if they hated you or loved you.

The bald man leaned back in his chair towards the man on the other side of the woman. They were whispering as I gathered my script, and the rest of my belongings, ready to head out for the three-day torturous wait for rejection.

“Wait,” the bald man said quickly.

My heart throbbed in my chest, so hard I was afraid they could hear it. I stared in his direction, trying my best to avoid eye contact with the glare spot on his head.

“I think we can all agree that your acting ability is spot on,” he said.

Oh my God!

“We had originally decided to cast someone more…more L.A.,” he continued.

Yeah, more L.A. I knew what that meant. Blonder, bustier, faker.

“I think we may have overlooked a great opportunity to cast someone with a more girl-next-door look. You’d be perfect. The audience would fall in love with you, and believe that you’d end up in an abusive marriage,” he said with a smile.

What the fuck is that supposed to mean? I look corn-fed and stupid? Who cares, if it gets me the part.

I smiled, even though I wanted to scold him with a mean glare for his inconsiderate and completely inaccurate words.

“Are you comfortable with the sex scene?” the man on the right asked. His eyes were wide and his lashes thick, thicker than most women’s.

“Yes. Totally,” I boasted, even though ‘comfortable’ was a strong word. I was willing. Comfortable? Not so much.

“We’ll call you and let you know within three days,” the woman spoke up, obviously ready to debate the boys on why I wasn’t right for the part.

“Thank you,” I said, and then left the room where I felt degraded, judged, and somewhat ecstatic that I’d won over two-thirds of the table of assholes in the room.

My phone rang, playing my ringtone of Nirvana’s ‘All Apologies’ as I walked down the narrow staircase of the building and out the front doors to the sun-streaked sidewalk. It was October, and it was ninety degrees with full sun—unusual, even for Los Angeles, at this time of year. I still wasn’t used to it. I wasn’t sure I’d ever get used to it. At home, it was probably forty degrees, and the trees were all shedding their leaves, the grass turning brown, and the threat of snowstorms right around the corner.

Tamara’s face lit up on my screen as I slid the answer button. “Hey girl,” I answered.

“Oh, thank God you answered,” she sighed.

“What’s wrong?”

“My fucking model didn’t show up,” she snarled though the phone.

“I’m sorry. Is there anything I can do?” I asked.

“Can you get here in twenty minutes?” she asked with desperation spewing from the edges of her voice.

“I can get there in five,” I replied.

“Oh my God! You’re amazing,” she squealed.

I shoved my phone into my purse and hailed a cab. I was only a couple miles from her studio, but the hot sun deterred me from trying to make the walk.

Tamara had been trying to get her big break as a photographer for years and had sunk every dime she made into newer and higher-end equipment. I knew how important this job was to her, and to her career, so I was happy to help.

After paying the cabbie, I rushed into the white stucco building where Tamara worked. I wasn’t sure what I was walking into, or what she’d have me modeling, but I didn’t care. I was on cloud nine. Two out of the three assholes liked me for the part. I had a chance. A real fuckin’ chance.

“Oh, thank God,” Tamara rushed to me with open arms.

A quick squeeze to greet her, and I was rushed into the dressing room. “What’s the ad?” I asked.

“It’s a new water brand,” she said, pushing a skimpy red bikini into my hands.

“Oh, wow,” I laughed, looking at the tiny suit.

“I know. You’ll be doing me a real solid. I need this to be perfect,” she pleaded.

“Of course,” I said, swallowing my modesty and agreeing to put on the tiny red bikini.

An Asian woman, whom I couldn’t understand when she talked, started fussing with my hair. A flamboyant man with wavy blond hair sat down in front of me with a large bag of makeup and brushes. “Here. Wipe off that horrific makeup,” he said with a snotty tone as he handed me a cloth and tube of makeup remover.

I did as I was told. This wasn’t unusual treatment; I’d gotten enough work to know that. The town was harsh, and the people harsher. It was a good damn thing my parents had raised me to have thick skin.

“You ready?” Tamara yelled.

The makeup and hair artists cleared the way, and I slipped behind the curtain to change into my suit.

As I exited, the man with all the makeup brushes was there to greet me. He didn’t say anything as he knelt to his knees and started brushing my inner thighs. It was an uncomfortable feeling, and I was just thankful I’d waxed earlier that week.

“You look amazing,” Tamara assured me as I entered back into the studio.

A large area was coated with thick layers of sand, and an umbrella stuck out with a backdrop of the ocean.

One of the hottest men I’d ever seen walked out of the other dressing room wearing nothing except firefighter pants and suspenders. Oh, my!

I shot Tamara a look of excitement with my teeth showing, my eyes wide, and my body so tense I could snap if I made any sudden movements.

“Emily. This is Josh. Josh, Emily will be filling in for Sandra today,” Tamara said as she moved behind her camera.

I extended my hand to him with a smile. “You want me—er—where do you want me?” I stammered.

              He grinned, showing off his perfectly white teeth. I watched his strong hand as it slid across his squared off chin, as if he was thinking about my mistaken question, and then through his thick, wavy blond hair. Jesus, he was fuckin’ hot!
“I believe you’ll need to be in my arms. Like I’m carrying you,” he said, his voice so sweet it could’ve been honey.

“Okay,” I said, feeling my cheeks burning.

I heard Tamara giggle from behind her camera. Thank you, Sandra, for not showing up today; and thank you, Tamara, for thinking of me!

It was awkward at first, but Josh’s natural charm and confident charisma made it easy to relax. He took the lead, pulling me into his arms while Tamara snapped the shots. “Just relax,” he said with a smile.

My body melted into his. Oh God, that was too relaxed. I tensed back up.

His smile was warm and his eyes patient as he stared at me. “Emily. You need to be really into him,” Tamara said. I am; that is the problem!

“He’s the hot firefighter that is there not only to quench your thirst with the water he carries, but to quench your desires as well,” she added, and then ducked back behind her camera.

I took a deep breath. This was her job on the line. I decided to ignore the fact that Josh’s chest was rippled with muscles, that his arms were so thick I couldn’t get both hands around them, and that he smelled like sex.

Tamara seemed pleased with my transition from a giddy schoolgirl to a professional model. She was all over the place, snapping pictures from every direction as I let my hands explore Josh’s body, and my eyes linger on his with hunger and thirst.

He scooped me up into his arms without much warning, causing me to squeal with delight from his strength. “Okay, ready for the money shot,” Tamara said, moving quickly towards us.

Before I knew what happened, or what was going to happen, Josh’s lips were pressed against mine. I don’t know if it was instinct, fear, or just pure physical yearning, but my lips parted, and my mouth opened without hesitation, allowing his tongue to explore mine.

His hand held my buttocks firmly, cupping both cheeks in just his palm. A tingle quickly arose between my legs, and as our tongues entangled together, I let out a soft moan.

Josh pulled back slowly, staring at me with his bright-blue eyes. His lips curled into a crooked smile, and he hummed in a deep tone that vibrated my pussy into submission. I knew he could do anything he wanted with me in that moment. I didn’t care that Tamara was in the room, that the rest of the crew was moseying around the snack table, or that it may all be caught on camera. He put me down. Not what I expected, or wanted.

“That was great, guys. Thank you so much, Emily; you were amazing,” Tamara gushed.

Awkwardness fell over me as I realized I may have been the only one feeling the sexual tension between us. “Anytime,” I replied to Tamara and quickly rushed into the dressing room.

I slipped out of the bikini bottoms, realizing some of my juices had escaped my swollen lips and saturated the crotch of the suit. I stuffed them into my purse, quickly dressed, and promised myself I’d return them to Tamara in the morning after they’d been washed.

After dressing, I said my goodbyes to Tamara. I groaned softly at the realization that Josh had already taken off; when I peeked in to see if he was still around, his dressing room door open and he was nowhere to be found.

“If you want more work, I can hook you up,” Tamara said cheerfully.

“Yes!” I squealed.

“I’ll see you at home. Thanks again, Emily,” she smiled.

I walked out the doors, hoping for relief from the fall day, but instead was hit with an unusual heat wave that made my skin instantly tacky.

“Hey, Emily,” said a familiar, honey-dipped voice—the same one that had made me soil a borrowed bikini just moments earlier.

I turned to see Josh standing by the entrance of the building. Was he waiting for me?

“Hey,” I said as coolly as I could.

“I may be way out of bounds here. But, I felt something between us, and I think you did too,” he said in a hushed voice. Oh, I did, I did!

My eyes were locked onto his, sucked into a trance as he spewed out the most delicious words I’d ever heard. “Can I get your number? Maybe call you for a date next weekend?”

My mouth was open, I knew it was, but I couldn’t close it. I nodded, reached into my purse quickly, and fumbled for my phone. Where the hell is it?

I finally felt the slick metal case of my phone and pulled it out of my bag. “What’s your number?” I asked, finally able to speak, but with a shaky, excited voice. Play it cool, Emily.

Josh smiled and looked relieved. Did he seriously fear I’d turn him down? Me? Turn him down?

I entered the numbers into my phone as he announced them and saved the entry. “Call me, so I’ll have yours, too,” he suggested. I quickly obliged.

I watched him fumbling with his phone until he had my number saved. “Can I call you in a couple days to set up something for Saturday night?” he asked.

“Yes. That’d be awesome,” I said, immediately regretting my choice of words. I sounded like a valley girl. Like, totally awesome, dude. Ugh!

He winked and then turned to walk away. I stood there, watching, wishing he hadn’t changed from the firefighter pants, and hating that he wore a shirt.

This has to be the best day ever!

Chapter Two

“Here. I accidentally wore this home yesterday,” I said to Tamara as I handed her the washed bikini bottoms.

“Okay,” she said cautiously.

I knew if I started rambling with details, she’d know I was lying. Her bright red lips pursed together as her dark eyes stared into mine, looking for whatever I was trying to hide inside them. “You and Josh really worked well together,” she said, deciding not to push me on whether or not taking the bikini bottoms was an accident or not. Thank God! I didn’t really want to tell her I got pussy juice all over them because Josh made me hot.

“Yes. He was easy to work with,” I said.

“Well, the client loved the chemistry between you two. So, if you’re interested, you can take Sandra’s place,” Tamara announced.

Her hand slid through her short black mane as she waited patiently for my reaction. “Yes! Yes! Yes!” I blurted out.

“It’s just another couple sessions or so,” she stated.

“That’s fine. Hopefully I’ll get the part I auditioned for,” I said proudly.

Lisa squealed from my news, finally coming to life from the couch where she’d been for two days. She was a struggling actress as well, and even though I felt my struggle was hard, hers was much worse. She hadn’t worked in months, and every audition she’d been on had gone horribly wrong. My heart ached for her, and if I’d known she was still buried under the pile of blankets on the couch, I’d have kept my news private.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were there,” I admitted.

“Oh, nonsense. That’s great news. Just because I’m down right now, it doesn’t mean I can’t celebrate your success,” she said, sweet as ever.

“When will you find out?” Tamara asked.

“Couple days,” I said calmly, even though it was killing me inside to have to wait another second before finding out.

“I’ll keep my fingers crossed for ya,” Tamara said.

“Me too,” Lisa agreed.

“Amy and Maria are working the car show all week,” Lisa said, rolling her eyes.

“Why didn’t you?” Tamara asked.

Lisa rolled her eyes again, but this time with more emphasis on her disgust at the notion she would stoop to that level.

I giggled. “I’m sorry, but I’ve done far worse,” I admitted.

“Exactly,” Tamara said sternly.

Lisa fell back onto the couch, pushing her hand to her forehead. Maybe that’s why she wasn’t working. Maybe the casting crew weren’t the picky ones; maybe she was.

“I’m spending my day at the beach. I don’t want to think about the audition until they call,” I sighed.

“I gotta run. I’ll text you the details for your shoot schedule,” Tamara said, rushing out the door with her equipment in hand.

Lisa was already rolled back into a cocoon in her blanket, so I went into my room and got ready for my day of relaxation and sunshine.

I said goodbye to the blob on the couch and received a mumble of something unintelligible in return. When I arrived at the beach, it was apparent that I wasn’t the only one with the idea of soaking up the unusual October rays.

The Santa Monica Pier was flooded with people, and the beach wasn’t much better in terms of finding a place with some solitude. I stepped onto the warm sand, made my way through the crowd, and found a spot near a group of college kids playing volleyball.

A part of me yearned for that college life. They all looked so carefree and confident. Did they all have their lives figured out?

The sand warmed my back, even through my thick beach towel, as I spread myself out under the sun. I wonder if they’ll call today? Stop it. You are supposed to be relaxing.

“Emily. Emily Warren, is that you?” a squeaky voice said from somewhere nearby.

I opened my eyes, pushed myself up, and turned to see Jackie Lemay standing behind my towel. Her bright-blue eyes, glistening tan skin, and shiny blonde hair all reminded me of everything I hated about this town.

“Hey, Jackie,” I said, sliding my sunglasses from my eyes and forcing a smile.

Jackie Lemay, the most irritating woman in the world, standing here, on my beach, on my day to relax.

“How’ve you been?” she asked, a touch of pity thick on her tone.

“I’ve been great,” I smirked upward at her.

“Oh, wonderful. So, you’re working finally?” she asked.

My hands pushed into the sand. They clenched into fists, grabbing the hot sand between my fingers. I wanted to fling it at her, hopefully scorching her eyes with the hot grains so she couldn’t work again.

“I’ve just been hired for a new water campaign,” I boasted, grateful that Tamara had given me something to brag about.

“Print ads? Oh. Well, you gotta do what you gotta do to survive,” she threw out the pity tone once again.

What did Jackie Lemay know about survival? She’d gotten every part I’d auditioned for, and with her family’s money, she’d never have to settle for a shit print ad job to survive.

“I have a few things lined up,” I smirked. “The ad is a favor for a friend,” I said, no longer feeling the boast in my voice. “What are you doing?” I hated to ask, but social etiquette dictated I must.

Her smile widened and she shuddered, as if the excitement within her was too much to contain. I regretted asking already. Fuck social etiquette.

“I’m taking off to Tahiti to film the lead in Scorching Rays of Beauty,” she said with more pride in her voice than I’d ever felt in my life.

That was a closed audition, only available to an elite crowd, most of whom were already-famous Hollywood actors. How the hell did she get that call?

I knew I was smiling; I could feel my cheeks aching from the plastered fake enthusiasm, but I was dying inside. My part, it was the lead, but not with a well-known director, and I was certain no established actors would be in the cast. I was jealous. I hated that feeling, but there it was, in full form, so large it blocked my sunshine, and most definitely killed my relaxation.

“That’s great. Good for you,” I mustered without spewing on her perfectly painted pink toenails as I spoke.

“You can say you knew me back when,” she giggled.

My phone rang as she hovered over me awkwardly, waiting for me to offer her more praise. No way. Not happening.

I reached into my bag, quickly fumbled for my phone, and prayed it was the casting agents calling me with good news.

My lips curled into a wide smile as I stared at my phone screen. Josh.

“Excuse me. I have to take this,” I said to Jackie, turning my back on her and sliding my thumb across the answer button.

“Hello?” I answered.

“Emily. It’s Josh,” a deeply masculine voice spoke on the other end of my phone.

“Hey, Josh,” I said, knowing I hadn’t done a very good job at containing my excitement from my tone.

“Are you busy?” he asked.

“No. Actually, I’m on the beach with about thirty thousand other people,” I laughed.

“Are you wearing that little red bikini?” he gasped.

“Nope. I only wear that for you,” I teased.

I was getting hot, just playfully flirting with him over the phone. My God, why does this man get me so giddy?

“I like that,” he growled in a deep, sexy tone.

“I won’t keep you from the sun,” he said, making my heart instantly ache at the thought of him rushing off so soon.

“Do you like haunted houses?” he asked quickly.

“Yes,” I lied. I was terrified of haunted houses.

“Great. Would you like to check out the Zombie Apocalypse in the Woods with me Saturday night?” he asked.

My skin tingled at the shyness in his voice. He was nervous? This hot, sexy man was nervous about asking me out?  It gave me a strange confidence I’d never remembered feeling before. I loved every second of it, and never wanted it to stop.

“I would love to,” I said, so giddy my voice squeaked as I spoke.

“Text me your address and I’ll pick you up at seven? They have a food truck court set up, unless you’d like something a bit more civilized,” he chuckled.

“No. I love food trucks,” I replied.

“Great. I’ll see you Saturday, Emily,” he said softly.

“I can’t wait,” I responded, and then ended the call.

I fell back into the sand, feeling a new kind of wonderful. It didn’t matter if the casting agents called today or not. It didn’t matter if they called at all.

Tamara about burst an artery when she found out I was going out with Josh. “Wow. So, there really was chemistry between you two,” she gushed. “Be careful, though. You don’t want any bad chemistry between you if things don’t work out,” she warned, quickly changing back to her professional mode.

“I will,” I said. I couldn’t imagine what could go wrong. Josh was perfect. Well, almost perfect. The only thing I didn’t care for was the modeling. I didn’t want to date someone in the same industry as me. It was too hard, and if we both had down times at the same time, who’d pay the bills?

That’s why I wanted to make it big, or at least get a break into the serious films before I started a relationship. Josh was just too irresistible to deny. It would be fun. Just fun.

The doorbell rang, and I rushed from my room to the front door. Tamara was already in front of me, pushing her way to reach the door before I could. She flung it open to Josh: beautiful, sexy Josh.

“Hey,” I said, gliding in front of Tamara as she smirked at my date.

He wore a tight t-shirt, almost tight enough to see the ripples in his abs. It didn’t matter that they didn’t show; I had my imagination, and it had been working overtime ever since our shoot.

“You ready to go?” he asked, smiling briefly at Tamara.

Lisa rose up from the couch to see the man I’d been bragging out. “Holy shit, you’re hot,” she growled from under her blanket.

I giggled as I gripped his arm. Wow, his arm was so hard and strong. “Let’s go,” I rushed him out of the door.

“Good to meet you,” he said politely to Lisa, and then nodded at Tamara before closing the door behind him.

“I’m sorry I didn’t introduce you,” I said, feeling rude about rushing him from my chaotic house.

“It’s okay. I share a room with fifteen guys, so I get the chaos thing,” he said.

Fifteen guys? Oh, no. This wasn’t going to work. Fun, Emily, just fun. It doesn’t matter.

I smiled politely and held onto his arm as he walked me to his car. It was a shiny red sports car; not what I expected from a barely working model that lived with fifteen guys.

“This is nice,” I said, sliding into the passenger seat as he opened the door for me.

“Thanks,” he said with a smile.

We drove to the haunted house with the top down, making it difficult to talk. I didn’t really mind. I wasn’t sure what to say to him. I was still nervous.

“You pick the truck,” he said, holding my hand tightly in his as we strolled through the food truck court.

“Just one?” I asked.

He laughed. “Pick as many as you like.”

“Wonton tacos from the Amasion Asian, and cheddar jalapeno tots from Big Marty’s,” I decided.

“Perfect. I love a woman that knows what she wants,” Josh said, leading me to the first truck.

“I love a man that knows how to give it to me,” I flirted.

His eyes widened and his smile smeared across his face. “I’m that man,” he professed with warm confidence.

Josh ordered the food from both trucks and grabbed us each a beer from the beer garden. “Here okay?” he asked, clearing off a table that’d been abandoned and left uncleaned.

“Yes,” I agreed, immediately helping him clear the trash. “So. You live with fifteen guys?” I asked, unable to fight my curiosity.

Maybe that’s how he afforded such a fancy car. Rent would have to be dirt cheap splitting it that many ways.

He laughed. “Yeah. When I’m working,” he explained.

I was still lost. “Where do you live when you’re not working?” I feared the answer was at home in his mother’s basement.

“I have a house on the beach, not far from here, actually,” he said.

“Okay. I’m lost,” I admitted.

He laughed and took a long sip of his beer.

“When I’m at work, it’s for a twenty-four-hour shift,” he explained, still not helping me understand.

“You model for twenty-four-hour shifts?” I ask.

“Oh, no. I’m sorry. I model on the side; that’s not my real job. I work at the firehouse,” he chuckled at my confusion.

“You’re really a firefighter?” I gasped as my clit jumped against my silk panties.

“Yes. I’m really a firefighter,” he said, not without a hint of pride.

I knew this man could be real trouble to my plan of staying single until I made it big. The only thing I could find wrong with him was that he was a struggling model, and now that was ripped away from me. I was left with nothing to hold me back.

He was extremely interested in my career, or lack thereof. I’d never had a man take such an interest in my life. It felt good.

I told Josh about my family in Indiana, and how I’d grown up on a farm. He’d been in California his entire life, and found it amazing that I survived in a world without a beach, year-round sunshine, or iced cappuccinos on every corner.

The Zombie Apocalypse in the Woods was frightening. Josh held onto me, keeping me close to his side once he realized how terrified I was. “We didn’t have to do this,” he apologized.

“There’s nowhere I’d rather be,” I said, right before screaming into his ear in fear.

I jumped into his strong arms, shaking like a little kid after a zombie got too close for comfort. I hated how real they looked, and how they just appeared from out of nowhere in the dark woods.

Josh laughed so hard his chest bounced me as he held me in his arms. At first, I didn’t find it as amusing as he did. But, his arms made me feel safe, allowing me to laugh at my ridiculousness with him.

We made it to the end of the path, allowing my heart to calm as the light from beyond the woods appeared. Josh didn’t put me down when we exited the woods, but instead carried me to the car.

My arms wrapped loosely around his neck as I stared into his beautiful blue eyes. “I must say, this is a first for me,” he laughed.

“What’s that?” I asked.

“Scaring the hell out of a date,” he said softly, staring at me with concern.

“I loved every minute of it,” I lied.

He chuckled. “No, you didn’t.”

His laughter was contagious, pulling me into the hysterical fit of amusement over my attempt at such a monumental lie.

His chest lifted me upward as he took a deep breath and sighed to calm down from his laughter. I could feel his heartbeat speed up, and suddenly, the moment was very quiet and calm. It was as if the entire world disappeared while Josh’s lips pressed against mine.

His tongue slid delicately across my lips, parting them as I let out a soft sigh of delight. Wow, this man makes me so hot.

Suddenly, our tongues were entangled, slowly gliding around each other. My grip tightened around his neck, and his arms flexed as they positioned me comfortably enough to melt into him. I did. I melted.

“I’ve had a great time,” he said , his voice soft as our mouths separated.

“Me too,” I agreed.

He set me down on my feet beside the car. He opened the passenger door and held my hand to help me inside. I watched as he walked around the car, every muscle, every curve, soaking it all into my memory for later that night when I dreamed about him.

The ride home was quiet. His hand gripped mine until we pulled up in front of my house. I hated for the night to end, but I knew he’d told me he had to work early in the morning, and it was already close to midnight. He opened the door for me, helped me from the car, and walked me to my door. I’d never experienced a man like that before. He was a gentleman.

“Can I call you again?” he asked.

Please!

“Yes,” I said, holding back my excitement.

He leaned in, kissing me softly on the cheek, and then walked back towards his car. I wanted more. I wanted so much more.

Chapter Three

“Can you be at the studio today at three?” Tamara asked.

“Yes,” I agreed quickly.

I watched Tamara grip her petite hands around the over-sized coffee mug and take a long sip. Her eyes were locked onto mine with a strange look of concern.

“Have you seen Josh anymore?” she asked cautiously.

I hadn’t. Not since our date, but I knew he had gone on a twenty-four-hour shift right after. He did text, at least a couple times a day. “No. We’ve talked,” I admitted.

“So, just the one date?” she asked.

I nodded, unsure of where she was going. A thick glob of anxiety sat in my gut, slowly rising to my chest as I waited for her to elaborate.

“Well, this may be an awkward day,” she chuckled nervously.

“Why?”

She took another long sip of her coffee, and then carefully placed the mug on the counter. “The pictures are a bit steamier,” she said.

I’d left a streak of excitement in the crotch of the bikini bottoms during the first shoot. I couldn’t imagine how it could get any steamier than that.

“I understand if it’s too awkward and you don’t want to do it,” she said quickly.

I could note the hint of irritation in her voice. Why wouldn’t I want to do it?

“I told you I could keep our private life separate from the shoot. I wouldn’t let you down,” I pleaded.

“It’s just, well… you’ll be nude in the shoot,” she said, quickly clearing her throat.

“Nude?” I asked, shocked, excited… mortified.

“Yes. Of course, the pictures will be tastefully edited not to include any private parts in the finals,” she said quickly.

The final prints were the least of my worries. Nude? With Josh?

“Emily, I get it if this is something you can’t do. I’ll call another model for the shoot,” Tamara said.

Another model? Another nude model wrapped in Josh’s arms? “No. I can do it,” I snapped.

“Are you sure?” she asked.

I nodded. The glob in my gut rose through my chest and rested at the bottom of my throat. I couldn’t speak. I smiled, trying my best to show confidence in my agreement.

“Okay. I’ll see ya at three,” she said, grabbing her bag and heading out the door.

Oh my God! What had I agreed to? This was horrible, and strangely delicious all at the same time.

My morning, and most of my afternoon, was spent grooming. I showered, shaved, and lathered in scented lotions. This wasn’t exactly how I pictured my first time naked with Josh, but I couldn’t let Tamara down, and I needed the money. Mostly, I couldn’t imagine another woman in Josh’s bare arms. No way!

I stood in the mirror, naked and judgmental.

My phone rang, pulling me out of the stress-filled trance I was in. I looked at the screen; a number not saved in my contacts appeared. The casting agents? I had given up on them calling; it’d been over a week and I hadn’t even received a rejection. “Hello?” I answered.

“Is this Emily Warren?” the stale voice asked on the other end of the phone.

“Yes. This is Emily Warren,” I agreed.

“This is Lola Fernading with Isola Productions. You auditioned for the part of Lucinda for our upcoming movie, Til Death Do Us Part. The casting agents spoke very highly of you, and have decided you’d be perfect for the part. Are you still available?” she asked.

I was bursting with excitement as I gripped my phone so tightly in my hand it hurt.

“Yes. Of course,” I agreed quickly.

“Great. You’ll need to be in our studio tomorrow morning at nine to go over the details of your schedule,” she said quickly.

“Yes. I’ll be there. Thank you,” I said before the woman hung up.

I was in a movie! I was the lead!

I let out a squeal of excitement after hanging up the phone. I forgot all about the nudity, and the anxiety I would experience in a couple hours. I was on cloud nine.

After dressing into a thin sundress, and lathering another coat of lotion on my skin, I headed to Tamara’s studio, hoping to get there way before Josh.

“I got the part,” I announced to my roommate and my friend as I arrived.

Tamara’s eyes widened and her smile tore across her face at the news. “That is amazing!” she exclaimed, gripping my shoulders tightly, and pulling me in for an embrace.

“What’s your schedule?” she asked.

“I don’t know yet. I find out tomorrow. I believe it is a local production, so I shouldn’t be traveling anywhere,” I said, easing her worries about losing her model.

“Just keep me informed if you can’t do this anymore. I understand if you can’t, or even just don’t want to,” she said.

I knew if it weren’t for Josh, I’d probably let her find a replacement.

“Since you’re here early, why don’t you go ahead and let Marcus get you prepped,” she suggested.

Her head motioned towards the tall, flamboyant blond man who’d done my makeup before. Ugh!

“Okay,” I hesitated, lingering at the table filled with croissants and gourmet jellies.

“Go ahead, if you want to be bloated for your scene,” Tamara laughed as she caught me eyeing the food.

“I’ll wait,” I replied with a grin.

Marcus ushered me into a private dressing room where he quickly asked me to strip out of my clothes. I’d never done a nude scene before, but I had promised to be okay with a sex scene in the movie. In my movie!

I slid my shoulder straps from my skin and slowly let the dress fall to the floor around my ankles. My nipples instantly hardened at the cool air-conditioned room, making me feel even more self-conscious. Marcus didn’t show any expression as he stared at my body with intent. “Okay, how’s your downstairs?” he asked.

“Wh-what?” I stammered.

“Have you shaved? Do you have any unsightly birthmarks or bumps?” he asked with an exhausted tone.

“That won’t be shown,” I stated firmly.

“Yes. Well aware of the shoot layout for the day. You will, however, be nude, all the way nude. If you have anything you would like me to hide, I suggest you show me now,” he said with a smirk.

“I am fine,” I said, slipping out of my panties.

I’d never felt so uncomfortable as Marcus knelt down with his face in my crotch. “Turn,” he ordered.

I did.

“You went to the beach, didn’t you?” he asked, rising to his feet once again.

I nodded.

“I hate tan lines. They are so tacky,” he snorted.

He walked away, leaving me nude in the small room, and feeling very self-conscious. I heard Josh’s voice outside the door, causing my pussy to swell between my legs. Marcus returned with a can of bronzer and an air brush. He instructed me to turn, lift my arms, lift my breasts, and hold my hair off my back as he sprayed me to a perfectly even tan. He brushed areas to smooth them, tickling my skin with the bristles. “Open your legs,” he instructed. I did, letting him tickle my swollen flesh with the brush.

“Bend over,” he ordered.

I hesitated, not sure if I wanted to do that at all. “It’s to prevent any lines. You don’t want white lines, do you?” he asked.

I shook my head, and slowly bent over, exposing my ass and everything hidden between my legs to this irritating man. “Perfect,” he said quickly. That was the first nice thing he’d said to me.

“Stay here, and don’t touch anything for at least five minutes,” he ordered, and left me alone once again.

Josh’s voice was deep and sexy as it vibrated through my body from the other side of the door. Excitement rushed through me, knowing I would be in his arms shortly, and he’d get his first glimpse of my nude body.

“Whenever you’re ready,” Tamara yelled through the door with a quick tap on the wood.

“Okay,” I said, my voice shaky and weak.

I gripped the robe left on the hook and wrapped it around my body. My fingers gripped the doorknob, slowly opening it to avoid the upcoming agony for as long as I could. There he was. Josh was so beautiful, so calm. He had a towel wrapped around his waist, one that was barely large enough to cover him from my eyes. Marcus stared in his direction, his tongue pushing across his lips and alerting anyone who didn’t already know that he loved men.

“Hey, stranger,” Josh said with a nervous laugh.

“Hey,” I said softly.

“So, you okay with this?” he whispered.

“I am, if you are,” I replied with a smile.

“I’m going to start with some upper body shots, just to get you two comfortable,” Tamara said.

I nodded and then looked back at Josh. “This is so hard,” I whined.

“No. It really isn’t,” he looked downwards towards his covered cock and laughed.

His joke made me giggle, relaxing me enough to fall into his arms and let my robe fall from my body. I was pressed against him hard, so at least he couldn’t see anything.

Tamara took the shots as we embraced. Our hands caressed one another’s bodies, and that chemistry the client loved so much quickly ignited.

A large bed covered with red silk sheets was our next stop. Josh released me from his grip, stepping back to get his first real look at the soft body that had been pressed against him. He smiled. “Amazing,” he whispered.

I couldn’t resist a quick peek between his legs. His cock fell limp, but still impressive, against his thigh. My eyes lingered for a moment too long, causing it to twitch with excitement. The muscles in his legs were thick and powerful, and as he turned, his ass cheeks looked like two boulders shoved beneath tan, smooth skin. My god!

It wasn’t difficult for Tamara to get the shots she needed. The chemistry between Josh and I was explosive, and for a moment, I forgot that we were on set. His body entangled in mine, the sheet rolling between us, and the feel of his cock hardening against my side made me crazy.

The silk sheets tucked between my legs, protecting me from being entered. I was wet, swollen, and knew the sheets were another item that would need to be washed. How was I going to sneak these home in my purse?

“Thank you, guys. That was amazing,” Tamara said, fanning herself off.

Marcus was in the corner of the room with a clipboard over his crotch. Yeah, we were hot together, everyone could see that.

“I feel like I owe you dinner,” Josh laughed.

“At least,” I teased.

“Why don’t you go home and grab your bikini and then meet me at my house? I’ll prepare dinner, offer you wine, and do all the things I should’ve done before climbing into bed with you naked,” he smiled.

“Yes. That sounds perfect,” I agreed.

He sent me a quick text with his address and then made sure I knew where I was going. It wasn’t far from the haunted house we’d visited, like he said. In Santa Monica, on the beach. Holy shit.

Tamara pulled me aside before I left to tell me how proud she was of me. I was proud of myself. I thought for sure I’d freeze up, but being in Josh’s arms felt natural, even with the camera snapping pictures.

I arrived at the address Josh had given me a couple hours later. The house was a beautiful stone home nestled deep in the chiseled cliff’s shore. My finger shook as it pushed the doorbell, and my heart raced as the loud ding sounded.

Josh opened the door wearing a tight t-shirt with his firehouse logo and a smile that melted my heart.

“Glad you made it,” he said cheerfully, motioning for me to come inside.

The home was lined with windows, from ceiling to floor. The view was astonishing with the ocean slapping at the sand just past his infinity pool. “Wow,” I exclaimed, unable to hide my shock.

“Are you hungry?” he asked, moving towards the delicious scents coming from the kitchen.

“Starved,” I admitted, realizing I hadn’t eaten at all. I planned on taking a croissant after the shoot, but I was so worked up, I’d forgotten.

“Have a seat. I’ll bring you a glass of wine,” he said, motioning me to the antique mahogany table situated near a large window.

I took my seat, stared out at the view and waited for Josh to bring me the wine I so desperately needed to calm my nerves. “Is there anything I can do?”  I asked as he handed me the delicate crystal glass filled with red wine.

“No. It’s all ready. I hope you like scallops,” he said hopefully.

I nodded, sipped my wine, and watched him walk back into the kitchen. Damn, his body had me sweating.

“Dinner is served,” he said with a smile.

I stared at the plate he sat before me in awe. Scallops, seared to perfection, and thin pasta with a pesto sauce. “You can cook, too? Is there anything you can’t do?” I asked.

“That’s just part of the job. We all take turns cooking at the firehouse,” he replied.

He watched me as I took my first bite, and his eyes danced with pleasure at my obvious satisfaction. “This is amazing. You’re amazing,” I said softly.

“You never told me about the part you auditioned for. Did you get it?” he asked.

“I did.”

He quickly scooped me from my seat and held me in his arms. “I never doubted you,” he whispered.

This man was too perfect. I felt my body melting into his strong arms, my heartbeat syncing with his, and suddenly, I realized, he could be serious trouble for my heart.

“Did you bring your bikini?” he asked.

Fuck. I forgot in my rush to get there. It was on the counter; I could still picture it there.

I shook my head, pushing out my bottom lip to pout.

“That’s okay. It’s really private here,” he assured me with a wink.

“Yeah, being nude in private is important,” I laughed.

“I wanted to get you into the hot tub,” he said, a flirtatious edge in his voice.

That sounded amazing. I could use a hot soak, especially with a scorching-hot man beside me. “If it makes you feel better, I’ll pretend I forgot my suit, too,” he chuckled.

Yes. That makes me feel so much better.

Josh grabbed the bottle of wine, and both of our glasses as he led me through the large patio doors. The sun was already going down, and the dim light of the tiki torches near his hot tub was romantically intoxicating.

He set the glasses and bottle down on the ledge of the hot tub. He stripped off his shirt, exposing the muscles I’d been yearning to see. His chest was tight, chiseled, and hard. God, I wanted to touch him.

I watched as he kicked off his shoes, and his hands rested on the button to his pants. He smiled, somewhat nervously, only adding to my excitement. “Here goes,” he laughed, undoing his pants and stripping them from his body.

His cock wasn’t hard, but it wasn’t limp either. My eyes lingered on the flesh that hung between his legs. My mouth watered, my nipples tightened, and my clit swelled at such a delicious sight.

“Your turn,” he said softly, stepping into the tub of rippling water.

I took a deep breath before sliding my dress from my shoulders. My skin tingled from the cool wind coming from the beach as his eyes took me in. “You are beautiful,” he said with a grin.

I felt beautiful. In that light, standing nude as Josh stared at me with such appreciation, I felt beautiful.

My foot teased the water by dipping in quickly and then pulling back out. It was hot and soothing. Josh smiled as I finally worked my way into the water. My breasts tightened as the hot water whipped around them.

Josh’s hands gripped my waist, pulling me gently across the hot tub and into his lap. My legs parted, straddling his thick waist and letting the hardness of his cock tease my body. “I’m sorry. I just can’t resist you,” he said softly.

His fingers pulled at my flesh, parting my ass cheeks and opening my pussy so that his cock nestled between my plump pussy lips. Sweet, delicious teasing.

My back arched, pulling my breasts from the warmth of the water and letting the cool ocean breeze roll over them. His mouth lowered, consuming my right breast while his tongue teased my tight nipple. I moaned, louder than expected. My body ached for more as he pulled his mouth away, moving slowly to my left breast.

His cock grew between my legs, threatening invasion into my tight hole.

He pulled me closer, sucking the delicate flesh of my nipple between his lips, and then stared up at me as if tortured by his own teasing.

He reached behind him, pulling a silver foil packet from a compartment on the hot tub ledge. “Am I being presumptuous?” he asked nervously, holding the condom between his thumb and pointer finger.

“No,” I gasped. I wanted this. I needed this.

He lifted me from my sweet spot on his lap and allowed my body to gently glide back into the warm water. He rose from the bubbles, exposing his large cock, hard and rippled with veins bulging from his flesh.

I watched as he slid the condom on, his hand gripping himself tightly to secure the protection. He lowered back into the water, pulled me back into his arms, and let me position my pussy over his impressive manhood.

This was fast. Was it too fast? It’s just fun, Emily. Just fun.

My eyes closed tight as the weight of my body relaxing pushed him deep inside my pussy. I let out a moan, louder than the one before. His hands clenched my skin, gripping me tightly as he slid me further down onto his cock.

The water rolled around us, excited and wild as he filled me.

His beautiful blue eyes filled with pleasure as his lips parted and a deep sigh escaped. My hips rocked towards him as his mouth searched for mine.

Our lips met, sending a quick electric wave of pleasure through my entire body. He tasted of the red wine we’d drank, mixed with a sweetness that no matter how much I tasted, it wouldn’t quench my thirst.

Our tongues entangled, my legs tightened around his body, and my pussy slowly started its pulsating massage around his cock. “I don’t know what you do to me,” he whispered, gripping my ass cheeks tighter and pulling them apart.

The water rippled around us, teasing my clit with what felt like flicks of a tongue. I pressed hard against him, rolling my swollen nub into his chiseled abs to bring me closer to my impending orgasm.

Water splashed out of the hot tub as we rocked into one another. Our bodies melted into each other, becoming one, as my orgasm exploded violently and without shame around him.

My breathing sped up, my heart raced, and my fingers sunk into his damp, warm flesh while my body throbbed, shook, and jolted in his arms. “Fuck,” he gasped, his eyes closing, and his head falling back against the hot tub ledge.

His cock began to pulsate, teasing my sensitive, tortured flesh, and quickly swelled to fill me with a satisfaction I’d never experienced.

Low, deep growls escaped his throat as his arms tightened around me and his thrusting slowed to a steady pace. I couldn’t take my eyes from him as he let his orgasm loose. Yes, this man was going to be real trouble for my heart.

Chapter Four

Three days on the set. There was so much more to making a movie than a play, or a commercial. This was wild. I loved it, except that I’d been so busy, I hadn’t had time to see Josh.

“I’m making dinner,” Lisa said on the other end of the phone.

“I’m not sure when I’ll be home,” I explained, watching the director glare at me as I took my personal call.

“I gotta go,” I said quickly, shutting my phone off and shoving it into my bag.

The man who was playing my husband was Mark Lewis, a B-rated actor from years ago. It wasn’t Scorching Rays of Beauty like Jackie Lemay landed, but it was my first leading role, and I was going to give it everything I had.

The long hours were exhausting, and not seeing Josh was torturous. It was sweet that Lisa was planning dinner, since the four of us were always busy lately. It used to be a ritual, at least once or twice a month, but I knew it had been at least three months since our last meal together.

When the director closed the set down, it was only seven o’clock, plenty of time to make an appearance at dinner, even if late.

I sent Lisa a text as I got out of makeup, letting her know I’d be there. On my way home, I called Josh, but got only his voicemail. I hadn’t talked to him all day, and even though I knew he was working his twenty-four-hour shift and couldn’t see him, I wanted to at least hear his voice.

Laughter rolled out of the house as I pushed my key into the front door lock. I opened the door to a smoke-filled room that smelled like someone had burnt old tennis shoes over a charcoal grill. “What the hell happened in here?” I asked, looking around the room at my three drunken roommates.

“Lisa burnt dinner, so we’re drinking instead,” Tamara said, holding up her beer.

“We need to open some windows,” I gasped, covering my mouth to keep from breathing in the stench.

Amy giggled, her plump cheeks pushing up her face. “Where’s Maria?” I asked, not used to seeing her without her sidekick.

“She got pissed off because I got asked to do some work for one of the car companies,” she said stiffly.

“I’m going to light some candles,” Lisa said, getting up and walking towards the kitchen.

I fell into the sofa, too exhausted to change, or to care about the burnt smell drifting through the room. “Here,” Tamara said, handing me a beer.

It tasted good. Cold, wet, soothing. Yes, I needed a beer more than I needed dinner.

“How’s it going with Josh?” Tamara asked.

My cheeks burnt as I let my lips curl into a smile. “That good?” she laughed.

I nodded.

Lisa returned from the kitchen with a tray of cheese, salami, and crackers. She laughed as she placed the tray on the table. “Dinner is served.”

It felt good to just sit there and talk to my roommates. I found out Lisa got hired for a semi-lead role in a play, making me feel more at ease as I told them about the movie set.

Tamara kept pushing the conversation back to Josh, and how we were doing. I didn’t mind giving them all the details about our love affair, but honestly didn’t know how to answer the questions about how I felt, or where I saw it going.

“He’s twenty-seven, six years older,” I argued when Lisa said he’d be perfect for me.

He was perfect for me. The age difference didn’t matter to me, and I didn’t think it did to him, either—but I needed something to keep him from entering my heart. That was all I had.

“Who gives a shit?” Tamara growled.

I didn’t. Not really.

“I have to pee,” Amy said after sucking down four beers.

We all teased her about her tiny girl bladder as she left the room, and quickly went back to talking about Josh, and why I was being so stubborn about a possible relationship.

“Fire!” Amy yelled from the other room.

She ran into the living room with flames chasing her from the kitchen opening. “Fuck!” Tamara yelled, quickly gripping her phone.

“Everyone out,” Lisa shouted, ushering us through the front door as Tamara called 911.

Standing on the front lawn, we all watched with horror as our house was engulfed in flames. “My camera,” Tamara shouted, running back towards the house.

We all screamed at her, begging her to stay away, but it was her only way to survive; we knew it was a lost cause.

The fire trucks blasted loud horns and flashing red lights as they approached. Men piled out of the trucks, some running towards the house, and some dragging the long yellow hose to the nearest hydrant. It was like a bad dream. Tamara was still inside, the flames were growing more powerful, and suddenly, I realized, she may not come out.

“Emily. Are you okay?” I turned to see Josh, all geared up in his yellow suit.

“Tamara. Tamara went inside to get her camera. It’s been too long,” I sobbed, falling into his arms.

“It’s okay. Stay here,” he ordered, peeling me from him.

My heart sank deep into my chest as he ran into the house with several other men. Now, not only was my best friend inside the flames, but so was Josh.

Lisa let out a cry, sobbing that it was all her fault. Amy comforted her in her arms as I stared at the front door, waiting to see if anyone came back out.

Two firefighters exited; I couldn’t tell if one was Josh right away or not. My knees weakened when they both walked towards the truck. It wasn’t Josh. It wasn’t Tamara.

“There she is,” Lisa yelled out.

I looked towards the door to see Josh carrying Tamara out of the house. She gripped her camera case tightly as the rest of her body fell limp in Josh’s strong arms. He set her on the lawn near us, shook his head, and smiled. “You’re not a very smart woman, are ya?” he teased.

She smiled weakly. “I got my camera, didn’t I?” she snapped.

He nodded and winked.

The EMTs quickly rushed to Tamara, giving her oxygen, and covering her in a cool cloth.

“What happened here?” he asked, his eyes lingering in my direction. “I mean, I want to see you, too, but this is a little extreme,” he smiled.

Even in this horrid situation, Josh had a way of making me feel safe and at ease.

I explained the situation, how Lisa burnt dinner, and we lit candles and opened windows to kill the smell. The candle in the kitchen had most likely brushed with the curtain as the wind blew through, causing it to ignite.

Josh seemed to agree it would be tough to determine the house was on fire with the smell and smoke still so strong from earlier. I felt foolish, but I was glad to see him.

The fire was finally contained, but there wasn’t much left to the house. “You’ll obviously need a place to stay for a while,” Josh said.

“Where are we going to go?” Amy cried.

“Do you have anywhere?” Josh asked. “Family? Friends?” he added.

“None of us have family here,” I explained.

“All my friends live here,” Lisa laughed nervously, pointing at the house. “Can I stay with you?” she asked me with a laugh.

“Sure, bring your own marshmallows, though,” I teased.

Tamara was fine despite how long she’d been inside with the blaze, and was released by the EMT. She assured us that the insurance would handle everything. “We can stay in a hotel. They’ll reimburse us,” she suggested.

“Why don’t you girls go to my house,” Josh offered, reaching under his suit and into his jeans.

“Here,” he said, handing me a key.

“We couldn’t,” I argued.

“Of course you could,” he said with a wink.

He leaned in, kissing me softly on my forehead. He reeked of smoke, but I didn’t mind. He was sensual, sweet, and so kind that I could feel my heart swelling inside my chest.

“Are you sure?” I asked.

“Yes,” he insisted.

The girls all thanked him as the other firefighters pulled him away. “I gotta go. Emily knows how to get there,” he said, grinning as he turned to head back toward the truck.

Wow, only two official dates, and I’m already moving in.

Chapter Five

The girls all gushed with excitement when they saw Josh’s place. “He’s a keeper,” Tamara said with a wink. I already knew he was; that was the problem.

The first night, we all snuggled under blankets in the living room, not sure if we should venture out to the guest rooms.

It was gracious of Josh to let us stay the night, but when he told us we could stay until our house was fixed, we were all a little more than shocked.

“And, you need to be in my bed, keeping it warm,” he whispered in my ear, kissing me softly on the neck.

“Yes, sir,” I agreed, vowing to never sleep on the floor again.

He situated the girls in guest rooms, each with their own room. It was nicer than our house, and much more spacious. None of us were worried about getting back home anytime soon, especially me.

“Are you sure you don’t want us to get a hotel?” I asked after our third day there.

“Absolutely not. You’re so busy with the movie, at least this way I get to see you,” he smiled.

Damn, his lips tasted delicious as he pressed them against mine. Tamara made a growl as she passed us, laughing at our public display of affection.

I didn’t care. I’d fuck him right there on the kitchen counter if he wanted to.

“I have to go,” I groaned, sinking into his arms.

I hated working so many hours, especially knowing Josh was off work for the next two days.

“I’ll have a bottle of wine chilled, a delicious dinner made, and a movie ready for you when you get home,” he said sweetly.

Home. I liked the sound of that.

He slapped my ass playfully and then pushed me gently out of his arms. “Have a great day,” he winked.

It was a great day, although long and tiring. The scenes were dramatic, and even though the director was virtually unknown in the industry, I felt he’d really make a spot for himself with this film, and for me.

I drove back to Josh’s place—home, as he’d called it so lovingly—floating on cloud nine. My body was worn and exhausted, by my mind alert and reeling from the possibility of having a relationship, an actual relationship, with Josh.

He was a keeper; Tamara was right. I wanted nothing more than to keep him.

“Welcome home,” Lisa said sleepily.

She rubbed her eyes and then gave me a quick hug. “Josh made an amazing dinner.”

“He’s a great cook,” I acknowledged, excited to see him. “Where is he?” I asked.

She smiled. “Waiting for you in the living room.”

I let out a soft squeal as Lisa ushered herself to bed. The other girls were already out, having been properly fed, entertained, and cared for by the most amazing man I’d ever met.

“You’re home,” Josh said, leaning against the frame of the living room entrance.

I couldn’t contain my endearment towards him, quickly sliding into his arms and letting my head rest against his chest.

Soft beats of his heart lifted my cheek from his chest, gently, and then lowered it back down again to rest against the warmth of his chest.

“Hard day?” he asked.

I looked up, letting my tired eyes answer for me.

“Hungry?” he asked.

I nodded, slipping from his arms to let him guide me towards the stairs. I took the step, one at a time, slowly, enjoying the feel of his hands around my waist. At the bedroom entrance, I paused. “What about dinner?” I asked.

He chuckled. “We’ll get you dinner. First, we need to get you relaxed and comfortable,” he said.

His hands slid my jacket from my shoulders and down my arms. I stood there, allowing him to undress me, one piece of clothing at a time, slowly, sensually.

Sex with Josh was so romantic, so thoughtful, and I knew from the bulge in his sleep pants, he was about to get really thoughtful.

“You must be exhausted,” he whispered, kneeling in front of me with his hands on my pants button.

He pulled, opening my jeans, and then tugged the material from my body. I stepped out of them, with his help, and then let out a sigh as his hands rolled up my legs and to my thighs.

“How about a massage?” he asked, slowly rising back to his feet.

“You’ve already done so much. I should give you a massage,” I protested.

He hummed a deep vibrating sound from his lips as his eyes lingered on my bare chest. “Lay down,” he ordered.

I climbed onto the bed, laying on my back as I watched Josh open the drawer to his nightstand. He pulled out a jar of oil and set it on the nightstand near the bed. My body tingled with anticipation. I’d never received a massage before. I was excited.

“I don’t want to get oil on those sexy panties,” he said softly, eyeing the silk panties still covering my most intimate parts.

His hands slid up my legs, slowly and sensually. He gripped my panties, tugging at them as I lifted my ass from the mattress. I loved the look he got when staring at my body. A hunger, a desperation, a thirst was in his eyes as they lingered between my legs.

He climbed onto the bed, lowering his mouth between my open legs. The warm wetness of his tongue made me shudder when it slapped against my swollen flesh. It buried into my plump lips, sliding between them, gently dipping into my pussy to taste the juices created by my excitement.

His lips tugged at my flesh, sucking it into his mouth, making me squeal. My back arched, pushing my pussy against his willing and hungry mouth. My clit hardened between his lips as he sucked it in, massaging it with his tongue, making me moan out into the large room.

“Roll over,” he ordered, lifting his head from between my legs.

My legs were quivering, weak, and barely held my weight as I rolled over to my belly.

His hands massaged my ass, circling my flesh as he parted it, creating a wild sensation shooting through my entire body.

His tongue glided across my skin, slipping between my cheeks and touching a part of my body not yet explored by anyone. My breathing quickened as he lifted away from me. Suddenly, the scent of lavender filled the room and I could hear his hands rubbing together to warm the scented oil.

Warmth filled my body as his hands touched my skin, massaging with power, precision, and a sensuality I couldn’t have dreamed up if I’d tried.

His hands pushed my legs open, giving him a view of my shaved pussy as he massaged my legs, and then my feet. I wanted to come as his hands glided up my thighs, letting his fingers touch my sweet, tortured flesh.

“Don’t come yet,” he whispered in my ear, sliding his body along my back and letting his cock press into my leg.

It was hard, warm, and I wanted it inside of me so bad, I begged. “Fuck me, please.”

“Not yet,” he chuckled with a deep vibration in his voice.

His hands pressed into my back, pushing all the stress and exhaustion from my body. I could feel the toxins releasing from my skin as he let his hands glide to my shoulders, and then down my arms to my fingers.

“Roll over,” he ordered.

I quickly obliged, rolling to my back and letting my breasts become the focal point for his viewing pleasure. His hands rubbed more oil, and then immediately dropped to my tits. His palms pressed gently into my mounds of flesh, circling around my nipples and causing me to groan.

My pussy ached to be touched, and I was pretty sure Josh knew that he was torturing me. I cried out his name, begging him to fuck me please. He just smiled, leaned down, and kissed me softly on the lips.

I rolled my hips towards his cock as my back arched. He chuckled, pulling away as his hands continued their caressing massage along my sides, and then my hips. My legs opened as he massaged each one, slowly reaching my feet. His strong fingers pushed into the soles of my feet, and then worked between my toes as his mouth kissed at my ankles, and then my calves.

It was sweet torture as his mouth moved towards my thighs, and then the hot breath coming from his lips could be felt on my throbbing pussy.

My entire body had been awakened by his teasing, bringing me so close to the edge of my orgasm, I could feel myself teetering on the edge.

Josh climbed up the bed, mounting me with strong arms and hungry eyes. My body pressed into the softness of the mattress as my heart raced with excitement.

He reached over me, opening the drawer to the nightstand. My hips pushed towards him uncontrollably as my body reacted to the impending satisfaction.

He pushed up, leaning back on his knees and gripping his hard cock in one hand. My eyes lingered, unable to fight the excitement the sight of his manhood stirred in me. I squirmed from my position, turning myself around, and lowering my mouth to the flesh between his legs before he could slip on the protection to cover the sweet taste of his sex.

“Oh, hell,” he sighed as my mouth surrounded the head of his cock.

He flinched between my lips as they rolled down his shaft and my tongue flicked at the bulging veins along the side.

My hand reached between his legs, cupping his heavy, warm balls. He growled with delight as he allowed me to take full control, sucking him into my mouth slowly, deeper and deeper with each thrust.

Josh rested his hands on my head, his fingers curling into my long, brown hair. He tugged gently, pulling my mouth from his member. “You’re gonna make me come,” he gasped, his cock already beginning to pulsate between my lips.

I wanted him to come. I wanted to taste his sweet excitement rolling warmly down my throat.

“I want to come together,” he argued, groaning again as my mouth tightened around his cock.

I released, knowing that the sultry sensation of him inside me was my ultimate goal.

His hands pushed against my shoulders, sending me gently to my back. I exhaled, letting my body relax as he tore open the foil package and slid the protection onto his hard, teased shaft.

The weight of his body against me made me sigh with satisfaction. My body squirmed beneath him, positioning my opening to receive his hard cock.

His eyes dropped onto mine, filled with love and kindness. I watched his lips curl into a smile, and then part, as if he was about to say something, something sweet. Say it!

I opened like a butterfly spreading its wings, allowing him to enter with a soft thrust. He stopped, not moving, breathing hard and staring at me as if to apologize for his quick excitement.

My grip around his shoulders tightened, and my back arched, pushing him deeper into me. He groaned and then lowered his mouth to mine. The sweetness of my own juices on his tongue made me quiver beneath him, sending his thrusts back to a stronger, faster pace.

Tingles shot through my nipples, electricity rocked my entire body, and soon I was lost in a fog of ecstasy, moaning loudly and calling out his name, careless about who could hear.

His body tightened in my grip, his cock throbbed against my begging flesh. The sweet release we’d both held back was let go in unison. Wildly delicious, and oh so sweet.

I hadn’t noticed the bottle of wine chilling on the nightstand earlier, or the movie on the TV stand. “Relax here. I’ll go get your dinner,” he whispered, lifting his weight from my satisfied body. Yes, this man is a keeper.

Chapter Six

“Good morning,” Josh whispered in my ear.

I opened my eyes to the sunlight blasting through the bedroom window, and to Josh, who leaned over my shoulder, kissing my bare skin.

“Good morning,” I said softly, rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

“Are you hungry?” he asked.

“What time is it?” I mumbled through a deep yawn.

“Seven,” he replied, and then jumped up from the bed, leaving my back empty and cold.

I shuddered. “I have to leave in an hour,” I whined, hating that I couldn’t stay and enjoy breakfast.

“Breakfast is already made. Get your shower, and come down for coffee and waffles,” he said cheerfully. How did I get so lucky?

I stretched my body, pushing my hands into the headboard. I couldn’t remember the last time I woke up so satisfied and relaxed.

The shower did its job, waking me up quickly with the lukewarm water splashing into my face. The scent of lavender was thick on my body as the oil washed away with the body wash. I quivered from the memory of our night. So passionate, so sensual. There was something more to what we were doing. It wasn’t just sex. It was much, much more.

The smell of coffee and bacon rolled up the stairs as I opened the bedroom door. Lisa’s wild laugh sounded like a semi’s horn, startling me as I took my first step down towards the delicious scent, and boisterous noise.

“Good morning,” Lisa chimed, smiling from ear to ear.

It was easy to see she was smitten with Josh as she batted her eyelashes in his direction, and laughed at everything he said. Oh, brother!

I moved towards Josh, wrapping my arms around his waist and tip-toeing to reach his lips for a quick kiss. My head rested on his chest after my kiss, turning to Lisa and giving her the ‘he’s mine’ look, to which she rolled her eyes and smiled.

“This looks amazing,” I said, looking at the spread Josh had created.

Belgian waffles, strawberries, whipped cream, and bacon were plated on the counter next to the freshly brewed pot of coffee. “Eat,” he insisted, pulling out a chair for me at the kitchen table.

“I’m so glad our house burnt down,” Lisa laughed.

I gave her a smirk, knowing that if Tamara heard that remark, she’d come unglued. She’d loved that house. It was her first adult purchase; even though she needed three other roommates to help her pay the mortgage, it was hers.

“Where is everyone?” I asked as Josh slipped a mug of hot coffee in front of me.

The mug was so warm and inviting on my hands as they gripped it, and the smell of the coffee so strong, it immediately perked me up.

“Tamara had an early shoot, and Amy stayed at Maria’s,” Lisa announced. “I’ve gotta run. Thank you for the breakfast, Josh. Good luck today, Emily,” she said as she grabbed another slice of bacon and rushed out the front door.

“You didn’t have to do all this,” I smiled at Josh.

“I love seeing you smile,” he replied, with a grin of his own.

Damn, just hearing that ‘L’ word gave me chills and made my heart race.

“I have to head to the station today to prep for the fundraiser next week,” he said quickly, as if he just realized he had things to do today.

“Fundraiser?” I asked.

“Yes. Why don’t you come? In fact, you should all come,” he insisted.

“I would love to. I’m sure the girls would too,” I said, loving the chance to use the ‘L’ word with him.

“It’s a week from today,” he said.

“Okay. Well, you can give me the details when you have time,” I said, shoving a piece of bacon into my mouth.

The waffle was too good to leave behind, so even after Josh kissed me goodbye and took off for the station, I stayed and finished it. I savored every last bite.

The movie set was just as I’d left it: chaotic, exhausting, and crowded. Cameramen, makeup artists, actors, extras, sound people, the director, and a handful of others were all clamoring around the set as I walked in, ready to start my day.

But there was nothing that could ruin my mood, no way. Last night had been too perfect. This morning was too perfect. I only wished every night and every day could be just like that.

The big scene for the day was my first abuse scene, getting hit hard in the face and then tossed onto the floor by my on-screen husband. It was unbelievable how upset it really got me, just to play the part of the abused woman. My insides were twisted, my brain throbbing, and my entire body ached from the stress I couldn’t seem to shake.

“That was great,” the director said, directly to me.

Instantly, my aches began to ease up, my brain felt the release of tension, and stomach was soothed. “That’s all for today,” he announced to the grumbles of some through the crowds of people.

I was relieved. Josh was off work today, other than the fundraiser prepping. I was looking forward to spending a day with him.

“Can you meet me for a late lunch?” I asked when Josh answered my phone call.

“I would love too,” he said, using that ‘L’ word once again and making my heart flutter.

I picked a place near the fire station, and quickly got out of wardrobe before heading that way.

The weather had finally offered a break from the heat, cooling to a content sixty-five. My radio blared a Lady Gaga song as I drove along the palm-tree lined streets toward the restaurant I’d chosen.

Josh’s little red sports car was already in the parking lot when I pulled in, so I took the spot beside it. He was already seated at the booth by the window and tapped to wave as I walked by. My cheeks blushed red as the excitement flowed through my veins. He made me so excited, just to see him, to be near him; this was more than just fun, more than just sex. What it was, I didn’t know yet. I know what I want it be.

“Do you think it would be rude to ask Tamara to be the photographer for the fundraiser?” he asked after we ordered our food.

“Not at all, why?” I asked.

“The photographer we had just canceled. There was a pretty serious illness in the family, I guess, not sure who, or what, but it was bad enough for them to just drop us,” he said, anxiety flowing through his words.

“I’m sure she’d be happy to do it,” I said.

“Well, the thing is, it doesn’t pay much, or like anything at all,” he grinned.

“Well, it is for charity. You’ve given us a place to stay, treated us like gold—there’s no way she’d refuse,” I assured him.

“I just hate to ask someone to do something like that, especially if they think they owe it to me,” he said.

I could understand where he was coming from, but we did owe it to him. “I’ll ask her if you want,” I said.

“How about you just mention that the photographer quit, but don’t ask,” he said.

“Okay. I can do that. And I know Tamara. She’ll certainly offer,” I insisted.

“Thank you,” he said sweetly, reaching across the table and taking my hand in his.

Those blue eyes pierced into mine with that same familiar look from the night before. They were filled with an emotion, something deep and meaningful, and his lips parted again, like he was about to say something, but didn’t. Instead, he heaved a deep, soft sigh.

My entire body shook with happiness as he squeezed my hand tightly in his.

“You forgot a little makeup,” he smiled, lifting his hand to my cheek.

He smeared across my skin with his fingers, wiping away the painted on bruise that makeup artist created. “Everyone in here probably thinks I beat you,” he laughed.

He pulled his hand away slowly, and I flinched dramatically causing him to jolt back. The waitress gave him a strange glare as she placed our food on the table. “That wasn’t nice,” he whispered as she walked away.

“What are you gonna do? Hit me?” I laughed.

When the waitress came back to check how we were doing, she still gave Josh a disgusted look. I had to tell her the truth, knowing that Josh didn’t deserve that awful glare. She looked uneasy at first, like I was being forced to make up the story. I laughed, showing her the makeup smeared from my cheek, and explaining my part in the movie.

She was excited that Josh wasn’t a woman-beater, but even more excited that she was serving a movie star. Yes, she called me a movie star. Me!

It felt good to have that kind of attention, even if it was just from a waitress at the small café. She thought of me as a movie star, and once my face was on the big screen, millions of other people would, too. Well, maybe thousands.

“I have a few more things to do at the station. How about I meet you at home for a romantic dinner?” he asked.

“Yes,” I smiled. Home. I still loved the sound of that.

Chapter Seven

“Can I stop by?” I asked Tamara as she answered my phone call.

“Sure. Is everything okay?” she asked.

“Yes. I just have something to ask you,” I assured her, and shoved my phone into my purse.

I waved to Josh as he pulled out of the parking lot and I headed downtown to Tamara’s studio.

She had just finished up her shoot as I walked in. “Hey,” she said, turning to greet me as I entered.

I watched her pack up her equipment carefully and thought about how foolish she’d been running back into the burning house to save it that night. Thank God for Josh.

“What did you want to ask me?” she asked, giving me a strange look.

I knew I was daydreaming, drifting off to a place of sadness at the thought of losing her. She was my best friend. My first friend in L.A. When I arrived in this town two years ago, she was my only point of contact. A Craigslist ad for a roommate was all I knew of her, and a couple phone calls before I met with her. We’d hit off instantly, and ever since that day, I’d considered her my best friend, like family.

“Is everything okay?” she asked.

“Yes. Sorry, I was drifting,” I sighed.

“No shit; where’d ya go?” she laughed.

I smiled and shook my head. She didn’t want to know. Not really.

“Josh just invited us all to a fundraiser at the fire station next week,” I said.

“Oh, yeah? I’d love to go,” she said quickly.

“Well, there’s more than that,” I said. She slid her camera bag over her shoulder and gave me another glance. “His photographer just dumped on him,” I stated.

“Oh, no. Does he need my help?” she asked.

“He does. But, he doesn’t want to ask. It’s charity, so of course, no pay for all your time,” I explained.

She laughed. “That’s not a problem. If it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t have any time to give.”

“I knew you wouldn’t mind,” I said, relieved.

I gave her the details, made sure she had a clear schedule, and thanked her again before leaving.

Josh was delighted when he found out she’d offered to help. Tamara was delighted when he informed her what type of shoot she’d be doing.

“Sexy firemen calendar?” she asked, her eyes wide and filled with excitement.

Josh laughed as he nodded.

“What sexy firemen?” Lisa asked, obviously eavesdropping on the conversation from the other room.

“We do this every year. We’ve always had the same photographer, and since they volunteered their time, we never felt right about looking elsewhere. But, the guys are excited to have someone new on the job. I showed them some of your work, so they are ready to get started,” Josh said.

“This is the type of assignment I dream about,” Tamara giggled.

I knew she was trying to sound like what she said was a joke, but it wasn’t. It was an assignment we all dreamed about.

Lisa got on the phone and called Amy, telling her the good news. I could hear her squeal on the other end of the phone as Lisa pulled the receiver away from her ear. “She’s in,” she announced with her loud, obnoxious laugh.

The week was spent planning the day, helping with anything we could before the event took place. It felt good working with Josh, helping him. He’d done so much for all of us; it was nice to be able to give something back.

The guys at the station were all amazing, but I still found Josh to be extra special. Lisa and Amy helped set up the tables for the food while Tamara and I worked on the shoot.

Tamara had already been there most of the week by the day of the fundraiser. She’d taken action shots of the men as they were called off to fires, and even rode along to capture the chaos, the heroism, and the sheer danger they faced each day. They were all excited to have her working with them, capturing moments that their previous photographer neglected. One firefighter in particular, Vinny, was more than a little excited to have her around.

I watched as they exchanged glances and noticed how she giggled like a schoolgirl when he was around. I’d never seen Tamara interested in anyone like that before. And Vinny, well, he was certainly interested in her.

Josh was shirtless, wearing his firefighter pants like he had on the first day we’d met. My heart raced at the memory of that first kiss. It was more than hot; it was scalding.

“Are you going to be okay for a bit?” he asked, pulling me into his bare chest.

“Yes. You do what you need to do. I have plenty to keep me busy,” I assured him.

The large banquet hall directly across from the station had graciously offered their space for the event. The firemen all needed to be close by, in case of an emergency, and they hated that some couldn’t attend if it was further across town. “You can’t schedule fires,” Josh had said with a laugh.

“Unless you’re an arsonist,” I teased.

A large green screen Tamara was able to snag from a friend was being used to create backgrounds for each of the shots. The men would all take their turns in front of her camera, each getting their own month in the calendar to adorn with their thick muscles and chiseled features.

A second book would be available, one with all her action shots of the men at work. It would bring in entirely new revenue, really allowing the men to help the community out with the funds raised.

I was proud of Tamara. She really came through for the guys.

People began piling into the large space, taking seats at the white-linen clad tables. Tamara set up her equipment and fussed with the lighting while I greeted people at the door, offering the programs for the evening’s events.

Once everyone was inside, I took my seat at the table in front. Amy and Lisa were already seated, and several of the men’s wives and girlfriends took the other seats. Josh didn’t have one date to escort at the fundraiser—he had four, and the other guys made several comments to show their admiration, and of course, their jealousy about the situation.

Josh ate it up, loving every jab, joke, and tease about his “harem.” The girls seemed to enjoy the razzing, as well.

A large man with thick gray hair and a long white beard introduced himself, and then all of the guys, one by one. When he called Josh’s name, my heart fluttered. I was so proud to be by his side.

Tamara took her shots as the guests all enjoyed the live photo shoot. On each table was an order form for the calendar, and a sample book of the action shots Tamara had taken. It was impressive.

“That was so awkward,” Josh said, sliding into the seat beside me.

“Why?” I asked, not thinking he’d be uncomfortable modeling, even in front of a large crowd.

“All these people,” he exclaimed, his hands in the air to show his dismay.

“Was it more awkward than getting naked with the girl you only dated once?” I laughed.

His eyes widened and his lips curled into a smile. He pulled my chair closer to him, leaning in to kiss my lips. “That wasn’t awkward. That was awesome,” he boasted.

“It was awkward. At least at first,” I admitted.

“No way. That’s a man’s dream. One date and the girl gets naked in bed with you,” he joked.

“Yeah, and not being able to do anything with her?” I asked, giving him a look to prove I was still right.

“Oh, I could’ve done something if I’d wanted,” he chuckled.

I shook my head as my cheeks started to turn red with heat.

“I don’t think so,” I corrected him.

“I saw your wet spot. You left one on my leg, too,” he smirked.

Oh, God!

He leaned in again, kissing me gently on the lips to ease my embarrassment. He was right. He could’ve done whatever he’d wanted to me that day. He had a strange effect on me, lifting my inhibitions without hesitation. Hell, I’d fuck him right here if he continues to kiss me like this.

Chapter Eight

The insurance company had disbursed all the necessary checks to the construction crew, and the rebuild was well underway. I knew we’d be leaving Josh’s house soon, and that thought drove me nuts. I didn’t want to leave.

“They gave me a check for a hotel,” Tamara said, flashing it in front of my face.

There were a lot of zero’s on that paper. “How much?” I asked.

She slapped it on the counter, smiling at the large number. “There’s four of us, so two hotel rooms, and they calculated the time we’ve been here as if we were paying for a hotel all this time,” she gushed.

“That’s a lot of money. Can you keep it, or do you have to give it back?” I asked.

“Give it back? Are you nuts?” she laughed. “I was thinking that we could donate it to Josh’s fire station,” she said in a hush, so he couldn’t hear.

“That’s an amazing idea,” I agreed.

Josh walked into the room. Tamara quickly scooped up the check and stuffed it into her purse. Her smile was riddled with guilt, and her lips started to curl as she worked to hide her anxiety. “You okay?” Josh asked, chuckling as he stared at her tortured face.

“I’m good,” she said quickly, before rushing from the kitchen.

“What’s gotten into her?” Josh asked.

“The insurance company stuff. I think they said the place would be livable next week. The kitchen got it the worst, but three of the four bedrooms were not so bad,” I explained.

I watched for a reaction as I spoke. I was hoping for a sad, ‘please don’t go’ look, and possibly even exactly those words to escape from his beautiful lips. He didn’t seem to have a reaction, at all. That is disturbing.

“I’m sure she’s ready to get back home,” he said.

Nothing? No sad puppy eyes? No begging me to stay?

“Yes,” I agreed.

“Hell, all of you are probably about sick of me,” he laughed.

“You’ve been amazing. It’s going to be hard to leave,” I said, hinting for something, anything, from him.

“It’s going to be hard to let you go,” he said sweetly, gripping my waist and pulling me into him. Finally.

“You’ll miss me?” I asked, my bottom lip pouting.

“Of course,” he growled, biting at my neck and making me squeal.

“I have to work the next two days,” he said as he pulled away.

We’d made love that morning, but I suddenly ached for more. I hated when he left for work; it seemed forever before he’d return. My arms wrapped around his shoulders and pulled him closer against me. His warmth soothed me, melting me into him, and when his eyes stared into mine it made me shudder in his arms. “When do you have to leave?” I asked.

“I’m already late,” he said, pulling from my embrace.

He seemed distant, a little strange. It gave me a very bad feeling in my gut. Maybe he’d just been nice, and this wasn’t what he wanted at all. Maybe I was reading more into this than there was, or could be.

Maybe Josh, Mr. Perfect, was too good to be true.

I sulked most of the day on set, upset that Josh hadn’t called. I knew my insecurities were getting the better of me, but I didn’t know how to make it stop.

“Are you okay?” Tamara asked when she made it home that night.

I was on the couch, covered under a blanket, and watching a sappy romance movie, which, of course, was making me even sadder. What if this is it?

“What if Josh doesn’t want me once I leave?” I asked, tears falling down my cheeks.

“Why would you even think that? You two are great,” Tamara scolded.

Maybe I was being silly, but something told me I’d gotten too close, and that I was about to get hurt.

“I dunno,” I said, laughing at my emotional outburst.

I told Tamara how I told him the house would be ready soon, and how he acted almost relieved that we’d be going. That I’d be going.

“You’re just scared,” she assured me. “I think you’ve fallen for this guy,” she laughed, wiping the last tear from my cheek.

I already knew I had. I’d fallen for him the first time we’d made love. I just tried my best to convince myself it was nothing more than fun. I didn’t want hurt. Not again. I’d been down that road before. He was just so perfect. I thought we were perfect together.

“Things have moved really fast,” Tamara said sternly. “I mean, you moved in with the man only after a couple weeks,” she added.

I nodded, fighting back my tears. “I know,” I admitted.

Maybe this fire wasn’t the blessing in disguise I’d thought it had been, after all. Maybe, just maybe, it was the thing that would destroy any chance I had with Josh. Once I left, things would be awkward. Would we go back to dating? To him dropping me off at my front door step? Or would we just drift apart completely, never to speak again?

“He hasn’t called me all day,” I admitted, feeling embarrassed that it bothered me so badly.

“It may have been a busy day,” she insisted. “Why don’t you talk to him? Ask him what is going on in his head. He may be having the same worries as you,” she added, and then gave me a quick hug.

I scooped up my blanket and drug it up the stairs to Josh’s room. I hated sleeping in his large bed alone, without his warmth, his scent, and his sweet sounds of sleep that soothed me into a secure slumber.

Tamara was right. I needed to talk to him. Maybe he was having the same concerns and wasn’t sure how to address them. He hadn’t been awkward until I told him we’d be leaving soon.

Josh was exhausted when he finally made it home. He hadn’t slept in twenty-four hours and had fought six fires. I felt bad for worrying so much, for thinking he was ignoring me.

He pulled his phone from his pocket, ripped off his jacket, and tossed it on the chair by the bed before giving me a quick kiss, and heading towards the bathroom to get a shower and much needed sleep.

“See?” Tamara said, her eyebrows lifting with the ‘I told ya so’ look.

I smiled and agreed. She was right. I was being silly.

“I’ll talk to him tomorrow when he’s had some sleep,” I said.

Tamara went into the kitchen to grab us each a beer when Josh’s phone buzzed across the counter where he’d left it. I could hear the shower running upstairs and knew if it was important, they’d continue to call.

“Is this Josh’s phone?” Tamara asked, picking it up and staring at the screen.

“Yes,” I said.

Her face was pale, and her expression filled with a mixture of confusion and anger.

“Why?” I asked. “Is everything okay?” I pushed.

“It’s a woman’s picture that popped up; a pretty provocative one at that,” she said.

The phone buzzed again. “It’s a text now, from her,” Tamara said.

My heart ached at the thought of Josh having another woman already lined up for when I left. Maybe he had one already, and I was cramping his style by being here. This beach house was a seduction zone if ever there were one, and the condoms placed strategically near the hot tub, the bed, and even in the little glass container on the kitchen counter told me he had been a playboy, and probably still was.

How could I’ve been so stupid?

“You want me to open the text?” she asked.

“No,” I said quickly.

“You need to know. You deserve to know,” she pushed.

I wanted to know. I wanted her to look, but I couldn’t bring myself to tell her to invade his privacy that way.

Tamara smirked, giving me a look of concern as she pushed the button his phone, opening the text.

I watched her eyes as she read it, hating that we were invading his personal space. “What does it say?” I asked.

“It’s not good,” she warned.

I sat up on the couch, staring at her with fear. She walked over towards me with the phone in her hand. “Here,” she said sadly.

I took the phone and stared at the screen. The woman’s picture that was saved was provocative, but not nearly as provocative as the one sent in the text.

My eyes lingered on the blonde woman wrapped in only a white silk sheet. Her long hair flowed on the mattress as she puckered her pouty red lips into a kiss. “Wanna hook up tonight? I need you again…” it read.

My hand tightened around the phone, so tight I thought I’d break it. I pushed it back to Tamara. “We shouldn’t have read that,” I said, fighting back the tears that were flooding my eyes.

“I’m sorry,” she said, her tone soft and kind.

“Me too,” I gasped, falling back onto the couch and covering my face with my hands.

“What are you gonna do?” she asked.

“I have to confront him,” I said sternly.

She nodded, and moved to the couch next to me, squeezing me tightly in her arms.

Tamara set Josh’s phone on the coffee table and opened the beers she’d gotten from the kitchen, handing me one. I took it, swigged half of it in one gulp, and then took a deep breath to calm my nerves.

“I thought he was different,” I gasped.

“Me too. Me too,” Tamara sighed.

We sat there, drinking our beers and not saying much about the phone call and text. “They said we could move back into the house tomorrow if we wanted,” she suggested.

“That’s probably a good idea,” I agreed, feeling that familiar pain in my gut.

I loved Josh. I didn’t want to admit it, but it was true. This hurt.

“We’d have to share rooms,” she said. “Or, we could go to the hotel. We do have the money,” Tamara smiled.

“No. That should be given to the fire station. It’s not fair to punish everyone because of Josh,” I said.

Josh walked down the stairs. I instantly tensed up when my eyes landed on him at the bottom of the stairs. He smiled, but offered a look of confusion in my direction. It was probably obvious that I was upset, but I didn’t really care. He should know how badly he hurt me.

“Where’s my phone?” he asked, his tone bewildered as he looked around the room. “I know I set it right here,” he said, pointing to the counter where Tamara had picked it up.

His eyes moved towards us, and then to the coffee table in front of us where his little black phone was placed. He moved towards it, picking it up and staring at me with a look of puzzlement and anger. “Did you take my phone?” he asked.

“Who’s the girl?” I asked.

He looked exhausted, and now angry on top of it. “What girl?” he snapped.

“The one on your phone, calling you, sending you texts to hook up, and sexy pictures,” I accused.

His eyes turned black, and his cheeks red. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he sighed. “I can’t believe you looked through my phone,” he growled.

“I can’t believe I trusted you,” I snapped, my voice louder than it should’ve been.

“Obviously you didn’t trust me if you were going through my phone,” he yelled back.

I knew he had a point, but mine was bigger. He was a liar, and a cheat. I didn’t give a shit what he thought of me anymore.

“We’ll be leaving first thing in the morning,” I said.

He stood there, frozen, shaken, and finally smiled. “Good,” he sighed and stomped up the stairs.

This was it. My perfect man, my perfect relationship, gone.

Chapter Nine

Josh wasn’t home when I finally woke up on the couch next to Tamara. We’d stayed up for hours drinking beer and talking. I gathered my clothes and woke Lisa and Amy, telling them the bad news. Tamara felt horrible for opening the phone. “I shouldn’t have read the text,” she said.

I knew she felt like it was all her fault, but it wasn’t. It was his. I was grateful that she’d read it. At least now I knew he wasn’t perfect. He was a liar.

The construction crew banged away at the house as we moved back in. It still smelled of fire and had a strange, eerie feel to it with black soot still lingering in the crevices of the walls that hadn’t been torn out yet.

“We’re home,” Tamara said.

That word didn’t have the same excitement to it when she said it as it had when Josh had used it.

“What do we do about the shoot next week?” Tamara asked.

Ugh.

“I can do it,” I assured her.

“I don’t want to make you do that,” she said softly.

I’d forgotten about the shoot Josh and I had together. It was the final set of marketing campaigns for the brand, and I dreaded having to be in his arms.

“It’ll be fine,” I said sternly.

“This place is awful,” Lisa moaned.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go to a hotel?” Tamara asked.

“No. You give that money to the charity you planned,” I insisted.

I knew Amy and Lisa weren’t pleased that the money wasn’t being used to secure a fancy hotel. I wasn’t real pleased myself, but I knew giving meant a lot to Tamara, and even though Josh turned out not to be such a great boyfriend, he was a good man who’d taken us four girls in during our time of need.

We all stayed in one room, sharing a queen-sized bed each for two girls. It wasn’t the plush life we’d grown accustomed to while staying at Josh’s, but it was home. Real home.

After three days, Josh still hadn’t tried to contact me. I checked my phone often, to which Tamara would usually catch me and call me out. “Please, stop thinking about him,” she’d say softly.

I always agreed I would, but I never did. I thought about him all the time. I still couldn’t fathom that it had all been fake. I knew there was real emotion in his eyes, and those words he always looked like he was ready to say, but didn’t, I knew what they were.

Tamara took off for the studio, Lisa and Amy had already left for the day, and I had my movie. Why wasn’t I as excited about my lead role as before?

“Are you going to be okay tomorrow?” Tamara asked.

I nodded.

It was my scheduled shoot, the last one I’d ever have to do with Josh. Part of me dreaded the idea of seeing him, but that other part—oh, how it longed to be in his arms once again.

“I’m gonna stop by the station and drop off the check. I’ll make sure Josh will even show,” she said, her stress showing.

I remembered her warning me not to get too close. I felt bad that I hadn’t taken her advice. It hadn’t just ruined things for me, but possibly for her career, as well.

The director was surprisingly nice about letting me have the day to do the shoot. Things had slowed down, and I wasn’t sure if it was money, or some other reason that could possibly halt the production.

“Is the movie still set for March of next year?” I asked, receiving only a grumble from the producer.

“We’re planning to make a lot of headway next month, so expect to be working long hours,” he said.

I didn’t mind. What did I have to go home to?

I slipped into bed beside Tamara, who was already sleeping. It was late. Really late, and I hated to wake her. We had the shoot in the morning, and I was dying to know if she’d talked to Josh. I fell asleep not knowing if he would even be there.

My alarm blasted in my ear, causing me to jump up from my pillow in a panic. Today is the day. Fuck! I’m not ready. I can’t do this.

Tamara was already up, and even though I quickly dressed and ran downstairs, she was already gone. My heart raced as I assumed she’d snuck off, not wanting to face me for some reason. Was it because Josh wasn’t coming? Was it because he was?

I ran upstairs, showered, dressed, and fixed my hair and makeup, even though I knew Marcus would redo everything, saying it was horrific.

At the studio, Tamara worked on her camera and Marcus puckered his lips in disgust as he saw me walk in. “We have work to do,” he sighed, pulling my arm gently towards the dressing room.

“Is he here?” I whispered to Tamara as I walked by.

She smiled and nodded in the direction of his dressing room. “He’s here.”

I didn’t fight Marcus as he redid my makeup; I was too preoccupied with anxiety.

Once done, I stepped out into the studio to find Josh, gorgeous as ever, but more distant than I’d ever seen.

Tamara directed us on what to do, mainly because it no longer felt natural to either of us to start. Once in his arms, my body melted, my heart softened, and that familiar chemistry returned as it it’d never left.

Our lips met, only for camera’s sake, but feeling more like they were meant to be together. “That’s it,” Tamara said at the last shot. They were dreadful words that I hated to hear.

“Can I talk to you?” Josh asked, his blue eyes filled with that familiar emotion once again.

“Yes,” I agreed without hesitation.

“I’ll wait for you outside,” he said softly.

I dressed quicker than I’d ever done, anxious to hear what Josh had to say. An apology? An excuse? A lie? I was a mess.

Outside, Josh stood on the sidewalk, leaning against the concrete wall. My knees weakened as I approached him, my heart swelling in my chest with each step.

“I wanted to apologize,” he said softly.

“Me too,” I said, not sure what exactly I was apologizing for.

“My ex was extremely jealous. She kept tabs on my phone, snooped through my stuff, and even hired a detective to follow me at one time,” he explained.

“I get it. There’s no excuse for invading someone’s privacy,” I agreed, feeling horrible that I somehow was the one on trial, and not lying, cheating Josh.

“Tamara told me you weren’t the one who looked at the phone. She told me you didn’t want her to,” he said sweetly.

I couldn’t believe she threw herself under the bus like that. “She did it for me,” I said quickly, defending my friend’s actions.

“I know. But, that girl,” he said slowly.

I took a deep breath as I waited to hear who this woman was, what she meant to him, and why she was probably in his bed waiting for him at home. Home. Ugh!

“We hooked up a couple times after my breakup. She lives in Atlanta, but visits L.A. maybe once or twice a year. The last time I even spoke to her was over nine months ago. I don’t want her,” he said.

His hand reached out for mine. I didn’t hesitate to let his fingers curl into mine. His eyes didn’t break free from their lock on mine as he spoke.

“The only girl I want is standing right here in front of me,” he sighed.

I leapt into his arms, pushing my lips against his and feeling his heartbeat heavy through his chest. “I love you, Josh,” I whispered in his ear.

“I love you, too, Emily,” he gasped.

“Let’s go home,” he said softly.

Epilogue

The theater was packed as we took our seats in the front row. Jackie Lemay stared daggers through me as I walked down the narrow aisle with Josh on my arm and surrounded by friends.

It was my third movie in just four years, and the premiere was filled with some of the Hollywood greats. Til Death Do Us Part had taken an extra six months to produce, but it was a huge hit.

My role as Lucinda blasted me to A-list celebrity status almost overnight, leaving Jackie Lemay in the dust as her big film flopped.

Lisa fumbled with her phone while Amy shoved handfuls of popcorn into her mouth. The opening credits started, to which Tamara jabbed me in the side with her elbow with excitement, and Josh squeezed my hand.

It was all so real, so perfect, just as I dreamed it would be.

My father no longer had that disappointment and anger in his voice when I called, and I had the pride of knowing I’d accomplished everything I’d set out to.

The lights dimmed as the movie started to play. I still wasn’t used to seeing myself on the big screen, but it was pretty damn cool nonetheless.

I looked around the crowd, feeling a powerful mixture of pride, admiration, and humility as some of the actors, actresses, directors, and producers laughed at my lines, cried at my on-screen angst, and sat on the edge of their seats, waiting—no, hoping—for more.

A standing ovation was given with loud applause once the movie played to its finale. My cheeks burnt and ached from smiling so hard. I couldn’t imagine life getting any better than this.

The lights turned on, brightly filling the room as everyone’s eyes were on me. I turned to Josh, who mouthed the words ‘I love you,’ before bending on one knee.

My heart gushed with emotion, causing the overage to spill from my eyes and down my cheeks. He was doing it, he was really doing it.

“Emily, love of my life, keeper of my heart. You are already my best friend, my soul mate, my inspiration in life, so would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?” Josh asked.

“Yes!” I squealed, jumping into his arms.

The crowd cheered, louder than they had for the movie. Josh pressed his lips against mine, kissing me passionately as if we were the only ones in the room.

I knew this had been the best day of my life so far, but I was optimistic enough to know it would only be the start of many, many, more.

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MR. COWBOY

By Ivy Jordan

This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places and incidents are products of the writer's imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locales or organizations is entirely coincidental.

Copyright © 2017 Ivy Jordan

 Chapter One

Charlotte

“Quit twirling your hair, Char,” Tracy squawked at me.

I pulled my index finger from the long, brown curl and smiled at my best friend. Her smile was sympathetic—too sympathetic. I didn’t want her pity.

“I’m sorry, what were you saying?” I asked, realizing I’d zoned out in the middle of what felt like another one of her lectures.

“I was telling you about Owen, my cousin,” she continued.

“I don’t think I’m ready to date,” I protested, wrapping another curl around my long finger.

“Charlotte, I know you’d like him. Just one date,” she said, pushy as always.

When she used my full name, not just Char, I knew she meant business. This was another one of her scenarios where “no” was not an optional answer.

“After Bobby, I may never date again,” I laughed.

Tracy rolled her eyes, and shot me another one of those sympathetic smiles. It was the first time I’d mentioned his name in weeks.

“You have to get past that,” Tracy said, her tone matter-of-fact.

I bit my tongue, not wanting to say what I was thinking in that moment. I knew if she found her precious Kevin in bed with another man, she’d need far more than just a few months to recover.

“I really don’t like blind dates,” I said quickly, avoiding an argument over the hurtful words I swallowed instead of spewing.

Tracy’s lips curled into a wicked smile; her bright-blue eyes danced as they closed in on mine. I watched her pull her phone from her purse, and then carefully scroll through images until stopping with a wide grin. “This is Owen,” she announced proudly.

Holy hell!

My eyes locked onto the image of a man without a shirt. His body was magnificent: rippled, toned, and tan. He smiled wide for the camera, his arms extended out from his sides like he was offering a hug. I immediately felt a tingle in my breasts at the thought of leaping into those strong arms. He had blue eyes and blond hair like Tracy, only his hair curled around his ears loosely from under a cowboy hat.

“Has he seen a picture of me?” I asked, suddenly interested in this date she was pushing.

“Yes.”

My heart pounded in my chest at her sudden lack of detail. “And?” I blurted out.

“And, he said you were hot,” she replied.

Hot? I was many things, but “hot” wasn’t one I would claim. My green eyes were a focal point for most people, and they received plenty of admiration. My body wasn’t bad. I was thin, somewhat curvy, but certainly not a Victoria’s Secret model. The girl next door. That’s what Bobby had always said. Ugh, why do I even think about him? I hope he’s choking on his new boyfriend’s dick.

“What does he know about me?” I asked.

“He knows I love you. He knows you’re hot. He knows you love animals,” Tracy went on.

My heart sank deep into my chest. Yes, I do love animals. That was my job, my life, but after the layoffs at the zoo, I was unemployed. Who wants to date someone without a job? Not me. That was always my first question on a date: what do you do?

“Did you tell him I didn’t have a job?” I asked, fearful. I knew Tracy was a stickler for the truth.

“No. I told him about you last week. You were employed then. Besides, what does it matter?” she asked.

I pondered her question. Did it matter? It wasn’t like I was a loafer. I still worked side jobs, and was caring for the horses on Mr. Thompson’s farm. I was still hopeful my job would be saved, and I would return to work. But the zoo had been losing money for years, and with fewer and fewer visitors, it was doubtful.

“I guess it doesn’t.”

“So, you’ll go?” Tracy pressed.

I hesitated. All I knew about Owen was that Tracy was his cousin, and he was absolutely gorgeous.

“What does he do?” I asked, contradicting the ‘it doesn’t matter’ attitude I’d just picked up from Tracy over my lack of employment.

“He has a small farm,” she said slowly.

A small farm? Images of a shack with a rooster roaming free on the front lawn danced through my head, causing me to laugh. “How small?” I asked.

“I thought it didn’t matter,” she smirked, calling me out on my double standard.

A farmer—nice.

I was desperate to rid my mind of the images I’d seen when coming home early from work several months earlier. Watching your naked boyfriend sucking a cock better than you ever could is something that ends up embedded in your brain, and a hot cowboy could be the thing to release me from that nightmare.

“Okay,” I said carefully.

Tracy’s eyes widened, her lips parted, and a small squeal escaped her throat. “Oh, Char! This is great. I’ll give him your number.”

I agreed and walked her to the door. “Just don’t tell him about my layoff,” I said softly.

She shook her head, smiling sweetly as she left. It was embarrassing, and not something I wanted to talk about on a first date. Hopefully, if things went well, I’d have a new job before the topic became an issue.

After Tracy left, I went back to working on my resume until my eyes grew too tired to stay open. I pushed my laptop to the foot of my bed, curling up in the warm blankets.

My small house wasn’t much, but it was mine. I’d worked hard for everything I had, and deserved none of the bad things that had happened to me in recent months. Maybe it was time for something good to happen, finally.

Images of the man in the picture floated through my head all night long. I dreamt about Owen, what he’d be like, what his voice would sound like, and what his hard body would feel like pressed against mine. It was the first night in a long time that I hadn’t dreamt about Bobby, and the ignominy I’d walked in on.

Ring, ring, ring…

My phone’s old-fashioned ringtone pulled me from the sweet slumber I was enjoying. I reached for my cell phone and clicked answer before realizing the number wasn’t one in my contacts. “Hello,” a deep, sexy voice on the other end sounded.

I slid up in bed and tried to pull myself awake enough to respond. I wasn’t sure who this was, or why they were calling me, but I certainly didn’t want to sound like I was still sleeping. What time was it anyway? Shit, already ten o’clock in the morning? The joys of being unemployed, I guess.

“Is this Charlotte?” the voice asked as I cleared my throat.

“Hello. Yes. This is Charlotte.”

“Good mornin’. This is Owen. Tracy said you’d be expecting my call,” he said in a slow and measured way.

Wow. Tracy said she was giving him my number, but I didn’t think about him calling. I was rattled. Everyone I knew sent texts. My body warmed against the smoothness of his voice. It was deep, thick, and dripped like honey from his lips.

“I hope I didn’t wake you,” he said quickly.

I cleared my throat again, smoothed back my hair like he could see me, and worked hard to shake myself from my sleepiness. “No, of course not. I’ve been up for hours,” I lied.

“Well, how would ya like to see a band with me tonight?” he asked.

Tonight?

I was in a panic at the amazing speed of this hook up. I’d only agreed to this date hours ago, and now here I was, half-asleep in my bed on the phone with the sexy cowboy from the picture and planning a date—for tonight.

“Sure,” I agreed before I could stop myself.

Something about this man’s voice excited me, aroused me really. I suddenly couldn’t wait to meet him.

“I’d like to get there early, but I understand if ya can’t get away from work.”

“No. I’m not working today,” I said, not entirely lying.

“Great! Then can I pick you up around seven?” he asked.

Seven? That was only nine hours away. I hadn’t been on a date in years; not since Bobby. There was so much prepping involved in getting myself date ready, I wasn’t sure nine hours was enough.

“That would be great,” I said, again agreeing before I could stop myself.  “Or, I can meet you there,” I quickly added, jumping out of the bed.

“I look forward to meeting you, Charlotte. I’ll text you the info,” he said, and then hung up the phone.

I leapt into high gear, tearing everything from my closet and tossing it on the bed. I didn’t have anything to wear, at least nothing I thought was appealing enough for a first date. The last item I pulled out had been pushed into the far end of the closet. It was a cute red skirt with a white lace petticoat puffing it out from underneath. It was certainly suitable for a country band, but I wasn’t certain we were seeing a country band. He didn’t specify, but I was assuming. He was a farmer after all, and any band playing within a forty mile radius of this small town was bound to be country, right? I convinced myself it was perfect, and found a nice tank top, a button up shirt, and cowgirl boots that were made with red leather.

The rest of the day was spent plucking, shaving, waxing, and moisturizing, just in case things went really well. No self-respecting woman took off on a first date without being prepared; at least that’s what my grandmother always said.

By the time I was ready to leave, I’d dressed—and redressed—five times, applied perfume at least a half dozen times, and wiped sweat from my upper lip so many times I couldn’t count.

This was it.

Owen texted me the address to a bar outside of town. I’d driven past it a few times, but never stopped in before. As I pulled into the gravel lot my heart began to race. People were still parking, walking toward the bar’s entrance, and I could hear music playing behind the large fence. All I’d seen was one picture of Owen, and I wasn’t sure I would recognize him. All the men wore black cowboy hats, boots, and had the same swagger.

I stepped out of my car, took a deep breath, and looked around for any sign of Owen.

There he was: dark denim jeans, worn leather boots, and a black hat. He walked toward me, waving and smiling as he drew nearer.

“Glad you made it,” he said in his deep, smooth voice as his arms gripped me tightly, pulling me in for a hug.

The smell of his cologne was hypnotizing, and the feel of his warm, hard flesh against mine made my nipples stand at attention. He was friendly, comfortable, and as he pulled back from the hug, I saw that he was even more gorgeous than his picture.

“It’s nice to meet you,” I said sweetly, trying my best to hide my tight nipples by pulling the button up I wore closed over my thin tank top.

His smile  beamed, rounding and softening his masculine, squared chin, and his blue eyes danced as they gave me a once-over. “You are much more beautiful in person,” he said sweetly.

I wondered what picture Tracy had shown him of me before our date. My stomach flopped at the possibility it was one from our Cancun vacation last summer. “You hungry?” he asked.

I was starving. I nodded as he took my hand and guided me toward the large tavern. We walked up the wooden steps; he pushed open the large doors and handed the man at the front two tickets. It was just a regular bar inside, complete with tables, a long, wooden horseshoe bar, and a couple of pool tables. Some people sat at the tables with baskets of food and pitchers of beer in front of them. As we walked past them, I leaned out to see what they had. It smelled amazing, whatever it was. “This place has the best chicken wings,” he promised with a smile.

“That sounds perfect,” I said.

The bartender leaned in to hear the order over the commotion. Owen took two bottles of beer from her, as well as a number to set on our table. The place was crowded, but as a couple got up to leave, he snatched up their table before anyone else could. He held the chair out for me to sit, and then smiled at me with a hunger that aroused my sexuality before taking his seat.

“So, they have concerts here?” I asked, looking over at the small stage in the center of the room.

He laughed. “Yes. Outside. They have a professional stage out back.”

I could hear the music playing outside, but it sounded more like a band practicing than playing a show. The wings came, and I didn’t hesitate to grab one, tearing the meat with my teeth and sucking the sweet sauce between my lips. I looked up, catching Owen staring at me with a wide smile. “There’s nothing sexier than watching a hot girl tear up some wings,” he teased.

I blushed, but didn’t stop. The wings were amazing; the best, as he had said. The music became clearer as we finished our beers and our food, no longer sounding like practice.

“Shall we?” he asked, standing and extending his hand to me.

Outside, it was spectacular. An open field offered wooden benches for stadium-style seating up on the hill; a large stage sat in the center of the open area with seating designated for VIPs around the stage, and of course Owen had tickets for the front row.

I was so enamored by Owen, I hadn’t even realized who was on the stage. My eyes lit up as George Strait offered a wink as I took my seat.

“Oh my, he’s my favorite,” I admitted, giving Owen a warm smile.

“I know,” he said with a grin.

“How?”

He chuckled. “Tracy likes to talk.”

“Well, thank you for taking me,” I said, realizing he’d probably bought the tickets months ago, and could’ve taken anyone.

The music started playing as Owen took my hand.  “Tracy showed me your picture a couple months ago,” he admitted.

I was stunned. Why had it taken her so long to show me his?

“She said you weren’t ready to see anyone new yet. I bought the tickets hoping that you’d be ready by now,” he grinned, and tightened his squeeze on my hand.

A couple months ago, I was still reeling over Bobby cheating on me with another man. Owen had been thinking about taking me to this concert for months? That sneaky bitch. God, how I love her. Thank you, Tracy!

Chapter Two

Owen

Wow!

Tracy was right about Charlotte: she was something special. That hot skirt she wore showed off the long, slender legs underneath, and that thin tank top did little to hide her excitement.

George was one of my favorite artists, too, but I was glad to see his show end. It was obvious his music tugged at Charlotte’s heartstrings by how her big, green eyes batted in my direction.

“You wanna get a cone?” I asked, hoping to keep the evening going.

“Sure,” she replied, that beautiful smile of hers dazzling me as she spoke.

I held her hand, guiding her through the crowd as we made our way outside to the parking lot. Some of the guests stayed for a beer after, but many were scampering to get into their cars and on the road. I pulled down the tailgate on my pickup truck, and then lifted Charlotte by her waist so she could sit. I jumped up beside her, scooted close, and waited for the ‘kiss me’ look I knew she’d give.

“Thank you again,” she said, killing the mood I’d just created.

“No problem.”

“Tracy said you have a small farm,” she continued.

Her questions seemed forced, nervous, and just a way of avoiding what she knew was going to happen. Those lips were so full, so pink, and looking into those green eyes, I couldn’t take it anymore. I leaned in, ignored her question, and pressed my lips against hers. They were as soft as I imagined; softer, even.

My jeans tightened from the unexpected excitement of our touch. Her mouth parted, allowing my tongue inside to explore the warm cavern behind those beautiful lips. Our tongues intertwined slowly, dancing together to a beat all their own. I wasn’t expecting it to feel so good, for her to feel so good.

Our eyes remained locked as I pulled back from our embrace. “Wow,” I gasped.

She sighed. It was a sweet sigh, barely a noise, but it made my dick jump up and take notice.

“Yes. I have a small farm. A ranch, really,” I answered the pre-kiss question.

She seemed interested, listening to the details about what animals I had at my place. When I told her about the horses, she perked up quite a bit, her tone changing to one of softness and excitement that aroused me—not just sexually, but in a way I’d never really experienced, so I couldn’t explain. I loved talking to her, looking at her when she got animated, and listening to how much she loved animals.

“Ready for that ice cream?” I asked, taking her hand in mine.

She nodded as I slid down from the tailgate and offered my hands around her waist to help her to her feet. My hands gripped the small of her back and pulled her slowly toward me and off the tailgate of my pickup. Her feet slid to the ground as her body pressed into mine. She smelled sweet, like cookies. Her eyes stared into mine with an innocence I’d never quite seen, mixed with a hunger that was more than a little familiar to me.

“You wanna leave your car here?” I asked.

I watched her struggle with her hesitation. Her lips tightened and her eyes narrowed as she finally shook her head. “It’d be silly to come all the way back here to get it,” she said.

Her reasoning was rational, but not exactly advantageous for my plans.  That tight ass, those perky, full breasts, and that sweet mouth of hers were all that was on my mind, not ice cream, and certainly not where her car was parked. “Okay. Follow me,” I agreed, flashing her the warmest smile I could muster.

I walked her to her car, put my arm around her body, and spun her around toward me with her back against the red metal of her Kia. Her mouth didn’t fight me, didn’t offer any hesitation as mine pressed back against it. Her arms wrapped over my shoulders and pulled me in close. The feel of her fingers tugging at the curls falling out of my hat tightened my balls and made my dick twitch. Yeah, this was gonna be a quick ice cream.

I grinded into her gently, with her back against the car. She sighed, another squeal escaped her lips, and her body squirmed against mine. I fought back the urge to explore her body. My mouth wanted to roll to her neck, then to her breasts, and my fingers were aching to find the warmth between those long legs. I pulled back, realizing my urges were only growing stronger as I resisted them. “Follow me, darling,” I said, opening her car door.

I watched in the rearview mirror as Charlotte followed me back into town. The small ice cream parlor sat on the corner across from the bakery, creating an aroma that made everyone hungry as they passed. Her car pulled into the parking lot behind my truck, and she fidgeted with something in the passenger seat as I walked toward her car. I wondered what she was thinking, if she was excited as I was.

“You drive like a maniac,” she blurted as I opened her car door.

That laugh of hers was contagious, so I laughed with her as I tried to defend my driving skill.

“I know these roads like the back of my hand,” I assured her with a wink.

Her eyes narrowed and her grin widened. “I was beginning to think you were trying to lose me.”

At that, I chuckled. Oh no, I didn’t want to lose her. She was coming home with me, whether she knew it yet or not.

“You didn’t have much trouble keepin’ up,” I teased.

Charlotte rolled her eyes at me playfully, and then laughed. I grasped her hand and pulled her from the car, and into my arms. “Don’t stick that thing out unless you intend to use it,” I teased.

“What? This thing?” she asked, sticking it quickly out from between her lips.

I growled. Damn, this girl turned me on. She was beautiful, feisty, and fearless.

“I plan to. Let’s get some ice cream, I’m starving,” she said with a mischievous smile.

“Starving?” I laughed, pulling back. We’d just eaten at the concert, and Charlotte had the large basket of wings. I loved that she wasn’t like other girls; ya know, the ones who were afraid to eat in front of a man. Charlotte was different, all the way around. There was something about her I couldn’t quite put my finger on, but it was something I liked…a lot.

“Well, I don’t wanna deprive you of ice cream if you’re starvin’,” I joked, pulling her toward the outside order window.

“Hey, Owen, what can I getcha?” Marcie batted her eyes from the tiny window inside the cone-shaped building.

Her cheeks were full and plump, her blue eyes twinkling as she spoke. Charlotte smirked at me as Marcie continued to ignore the fact she was even there. “I’ll take a triple scoop of chocolate in a sugar cone,” Charlotte blurted out.

Marcie seemed annoyed that she’d intruded upon her flirting time, but I was relieved, and a little impressed by her aggression.

“I’ll have the same,” I said, smiling at Charlotte as Marcie huffed from the window.

There were so many things I wanted to ask her, so many things I wanted to know. It wasn’t like me to be so interested in a woman, but like I said, there was something different about Charlotte, something special.

“How many horses do you have?” she asked, lapping at the smooth, chocolate ice cream.

My dick swelled in my pants as I watched her tongue wrap around the cone to catch the drips. “Six,” I answered quickly.

Her eyes widened. “That doesn’t sound like a small place,” she said.

“For a ranch, it’s small. Would you like to see it?” I asked.

I watched as her mouth covered the top of her cone, her lips moved down slowly over the soft cream. She sucked gently at the cone before releasing her lips. What was left was a small, thin peak of ice cream at the tip. Watching her lapping at that cone caused me to release a small amount of precum into my briefs.

“I’d love to,” she said.

“It’s not far from here. Follow me?” I suggested.

She seemed to hesitate for a moment, but then nodded.

I wanted to lean in and kiss her again, but instead I took her hand. She wasn’t like other women, at least not the ones I knew. She didn’t throw herself at me, and she didn’t even seem to notice the effect she had on me or on men in general. At the concert, she turned plenty of heads, but never appeared to notice.

Chapter Three

Charlotte

Owen was irresistible, with those deep, blue eyes and his wicked smile. I followed his pickup through the backroads leading out of town until he pulled onto a gravel road. The sign above the entrance read ‘Martin Ranch,’ one I’d passed many times before. This was his small farm?

He stopped his truck at a white garage, and while I sat in my car in awe, he made his way to me. “You gettin’ out?” he asked with a nervous laugh.

I snapped out of my daze and opened the door to my car, letting Owen take my hand to help me to my feet. “This is your place?” I asked.

He nodded. It was obvious he was proud.

A large golden retriever greeted me with a cold nose up my skirt. I giggled, pushing the dog’s snout away from my crotch and patting its head gently.

“This is Goldie,” he said, whistling for her to give me some space. She’d shoved her nose far enough under my skirt that I was certain she’d be able to sniff out my scent if ever I went missing.

“Would you like a drink?” he asked, motioning toward the brick ranch just beyond the garage.

“Sure,” I agreed, curious to see inside.

We walked along a paved path to the front door. Owen opened up his house, motioned for me to go inside, and then locked the door behind him. The turn of the lock made my pussy swell with anticipation. It had been long time since I’d been with a man, and if you didn’t count Bobby, who proved not to be a man at all, it had been years.

“Have a look around if ya want. I’ll grab us a beer.”

I took him up on his offer, wandering through the large living room to a den on the other side. The place was decorated with tasteful furniture, mostly antiques, and all in excellent condition. There wasn’t much sign of a woman ever having lived there, and no pictures to indicate otherwise.

“You live here alone?” I asked.

“Yes.”

He disappeared into the kitchen where I could hear the clinking of bottles. He returned holding two beers, extending one to me. “You always lived here alone?” I asked, curious about his past.

“Yes,” he said with a smile.

We sat down on the large couch where Owen scooted super close to me. I could feel the warmth from his skin and almost taste his cologne as he snuggled in. “Never married?” I asked.

He shook his head. “You?” he asked, leaning in to me before I could answer.

I shook my head as his mouth met mine. The softness of his lips pulled me into a trance, and soon the sweetness of his tongue had me under his control. My body ached for more as his hands roamed over it, their touch caressing my skin. My breasts pushed upward, my back arching as he lowered me. He pulled up from his kiss, smiled, and then let out a deep sigh. “You’re one amazing woman, Charlotte.”

I reached up, pushing my mouth back onto his. I appreciated the compliment, but I needed his touch more than his words. My body grinded against his, feeling the tight rock in his jeans as it pressed against my thigh. I moaned, pulling back from our kiss, and let his mouth wander down my neck. My skin tingled as his tongue slid across my sensitive skin, and I squealed when his lips tightened around it and sucked it into his mouth.

His hands pushed at my skirt, hiking it high onto my hips as he pushed my panties aside.

My pussy was wet, hot, and swollen as his finger grazed my delicate skin. I bucked gently, pushing myself toward his hand and letting out a soft moan of approval. “You want me to stop?” he asked softly.

“No,” I gasped.

One finger slid inside of me, pushing apart my plump lips. My pussy immediately gripped at his digit, pulling it deeper inside of my body as I pulsated around him. Pleasure ripped through my body as his mouth wrapped around my breast. I reached down, gripping the hardness in his jeans, rubbing the denim with aggression as he began to growl.

His mouth lowered while his hands pulled my tank top up and over my breasts. His tongue on the bare skin made me sigh with excitement, and his teeth grazing at my erect nipple made me let out a moan.

He chuckled at my enthusiasm, lifting his head to smile at me with those beautiful eyes before lowering down to my belly.

“Can I take these off?” he asked, tugging at my skirt and panties.

I nodded, biting my bottom lip as he gave my clothes a tug. Soon, my body was nude from the waist down, and his eyes were gazing upon my most intimate parts. He lowered his mouth, slowly sucking my clit between his lips, rolling it around his tongue, and then tugging on it to make me squeal. His finger returned to the warmth inside my pussy, slowly fucking me while his mouth continued to tease me.

“Do you want me to stop?” he asked again, his voice soft.

“No,” I whispered.

He reached for his pants, unlatching his belt, and then his button. The denim slid from his body, pulling his briefs down as well. I heard the thud of his boots hitting the floor, and then the scratching of the denim being kicked from his feet.

His cock was long, hard, and warm. I reached down, gripping it in my hand to slowly stroke him while he let his lips wander back to my breast, and then neck.

My mouth searched for his, finding his lips and parting them with my tongue as his cock pressed into my thigh.

I wrapped my arms around him tightly, kissing his neck and feeling the warmth of his body against mine. I was ready, so ready, but he seemed to be hesitating. “Just a sec,” he said sweetly, lifting himself from me.

It felt cold without him on me, lonely even. My body ached for attention as he reached into his jean pocket and pulled out a condom.

His blue eyes smiled at me, offering a wink as he ripped open the foil package. He slid the condom onto the tip of his cock and rolled it down with one thumb like a pro. He was back on me in an instant, pressing into me once again, this time ready to enter. My body bucked beneath him, pushing my ass toward him, letting his cock rub against my swollen clit.

His hand reached between my legs, his fingers working my juices just a bit more before he situated his cock between my pussy lips. I looked into his eyes, feeling something more than just a sexual urgency. I liked him. Really liked him.

“You’re truly amazing,” he whispered.

I felt the pressure of his unit against my body, and then suddenly the relief of my body letting go. He was inside of me, deep inside, and my body squirmed with pleasure beneath him.

My hands  slowly romanced heir way down his back to his ass cheeks, feeling the tightening of his muscles as he thrust into me.

My pussy was already pulsating, my legs already quivering, and my moans were growing louder and louder. Owen kissed me softly on the neck, and then the lips, causing my body to erupt with pleasure. I squeezed around him, tightening and then releasing with each wave of my orgasm. He continued to thrust into me, harder and deeper as I called out his name.

A deep growl sounded in my ear. He buried his face into my chest, his mouth suckling at my nipple as he throbbed between my legs.

His weight fell onto me, almost crushing me into the cushion of the couch for just a second while he gathered his composure.

When he lifted, his eyes locked onto mine, and in that moment, I knew we both felt something special.

“Wow,” he gasped, and then rolled over and off of me.

My legs continued to quiver. I was unable to speak. “Wow” didn’t come close to capturing what I felt. “Wow” was the understatement of the year.

We finished our beers, not bothering to put our clothes back on, instead sitting there on the couch half dressed. Owen still had his t-shirt on, and I had mine. When I laughed about the fact we’d made love with our shirts on, he made me take mine off as he ripped his away. “We’ll have to do it again right,” he said, lifting me into his arms and carrying me to his large bed.

He made a fire, even though it wasn’t a cold night. It was romantic laying there with Owen in his big bed next to a fire. It felt like a place I could stay for the rest of my life.

We did a lot of talking that night, in between three more rounds of lovemaking. I found out Owen was an only child, a momma’s boy, and he’d earned the money for the ranch by buying and selling cattle as a teenager. He was impressive, but mysterious. Never married, and he never mentioned a woman in his life, making me wonder if maybe he was just a playboy.

I told him about my job, at least the one I used to have. I neglected to tell him I’d been laid off, figuring that would spoil the mood of the moment. I would tell him, just not tonight. I could’ve stared into his eyes until sunrise, and listened to him talk for the rest of my life. I was content. I wasn’t sure when I finally drifted off to sleep, but when my eyes opened it was already daybreak, and I was in the bed alone.

I gathered my clothes, looked for Owen in the kitchen, the den, and even outside in the garage. There were several trucks parked outside, but the shiny blue one that Owen drove was gone.

I started to leave a note, explaining why I left and to thank him for a great night, but my gut told me not to. If he was a player, then this was to be expected. Why make myself look needy? He didn’t leave me a note; instead, he just left me.

I walked outside and was greeted by an older man with silver hair and leathery skin. He tipped his hat toward me as I passed him. “Good morning, ma’am,” he said.

I felt stupid, humiliated really. Leaving a man’s house that wasn’t even home was embarrassing enough, let alone with a crowd to watch you do it. Ugh!

My car started and I backed out, waving at the man who was kind enough to greet me. I didn’t look back. It was a great night; that’s all. What did I expect, anyway? I was the one who said I wasn’t ready to date, and that was true. I needed more time. Trusting a man again after what Bobby did was going to be a process. A one-night stand only pushed that healing backwards. This was not what I needed at all. Why was I so stupid?

Chapter Four

Owen

“Owen!” I turned to see who was calling my name.

Tracy waved her hands in the air frantically as she ran across the street to my truck. Her blonde hair bounced on her shoulders. “Hey, Owen!” she called out.

“Hey, stranger,” I said sweetly, happy to see my favorite cousin.

“I just got back home,” she said, still out of breath from her run to chase me down.

“Where ya been?” I asked, already knowing she was gone to see her long-distance boyfriend.

“Visiting Kevin,” her lips curled into a wide grin.

“I don’t understand that long-distance dating,” I shrugged, not willing to say anything else on my mind. It seemed like a great setup for Kevin. Hell, he probably had a new girl come into town each week. But, for my cousin, my sweet Tracy, I didn’t like it at all. I just pictured this guy stringing along women all over the country, having each one fly in when he got lonely, sending them all home when he was bored with them. Tracy was a hopeless romantic though, and she trusted Kevin. Why, I wasn’t sure. But, she did. I wished I could trust like that again, love like that again.

“It’s not so bad. I think I might move out there soon,” she said with a wild grin. “Speakin’ of dating, how’d yours go with Char last week?” she asked.

I grinned, knowing I looked like the cat that’d just ate the mouse. “It went as expected,” I said with a wink.

“So, you two hit it off? I knew it!” she shrieked with delight. She bounced again, her eyes bright and filled with cheer. That hopeless romantic in her was screaming with delight at the thought of making a match.

“Yeah. We hit it off a few times,” I laughed.

Her face soured. Not a fan of my humor, as usual. I smiled, continued loading the feed into my truck, and avoided direct eye contact with my now-angry cousin. “You gonna see her again?” she snapped.

“Why? So we can fall in love like you and Kevin?” I asked with a chuckle.

Her face told me she still didn’t think I was funny.

“It was just another one-night stand. You said she had a bad breakup and needed a kick start back into the dating game. Well, you’re welcome,” I smirked.

“Wow. Owen Michael Martin, your mother would wear your backside raw if she heard you talkin’ like that,” she exclaimed, complete with hand on hip.

“What? Trust me, she wanted it, and she left a happy girl,” I said quickly, turning to defend myself.

“Have you called her?” she snapped.

“No.”

“Why? Didn’t you like her?” she asked.

“I dunno. Yes, I liked her. She’s actually a pretty amazing woman.”

“Then, why haven’t you called her?” she asked.

I wasn’t quite sure how to answer that question. I guess I’d intended on it—at least, that is, until I came back to her gone. She was sleeping so peacefully, I didn’t want to wake her, so I snuck out to grab breakfast. When I returned, she was gone, no note, nothing. I didn’t mind a good one-night stand, but she felt different, at least I had thought she did. Maybe I was wrong. I didn’t understand women, and probably never would. All I knew was I didn’t like the feeling I got in my gut when I pulled up and saw her car gone. The feeling was even less pleasant when I saw my empty bed. I could still smell her in the room, on my sheets, on my skin. I had to shower to get rid of it, and throw the sheets into the wash to strip her memory from my room. The couch, now that was a different story. I couldn’t exactly throw it in the washer, and even spraying it with fabric stuff, you could still smell her.

“She hasn’t called me, either,” I defended.

“I told you about her breakup, and how bad it was, right?” Tracy asked, backing me up to the side of my truck. I felt attacked as she moved in, like a pit bull ready to go after its victim’s jugular. She was a tiny little thing, but intimidating nonetheless. “Well, she got laid off from her job a couple weeks ago, so she doesn’t need you playing games with her head, or heart,” she said.

She hadn’t told me about her job. We’d stayed up all night talking, and I was pretty sure she spoke about her job like she still had it. “I didn’t know that,” I said.

“She was probably too embarrassed to tell you,” Tracy scoffed.

I felt horrible, but confused. Why did she leave, then? Why hadn’t she called? I wasn’t the only one involved in this. She had played her part.

“You need to call her,” Tracy snapped.

I actually loved the idea of calling Charlotte, but I didn’t like being told what to do by anyone, especially Tracy. “She’s a big girl. She could’ve called me just as easily as I could’ve called her. Besides, she’s the one who took off in the morning without a trace. It was just sex. Amazing sex,” I smirked.

Tracy’s face soured quickly at my teasing. “Women aren’t like you pigs,” she scowled.

Wow. Now I’m a pig? A week ago I was the ideal man to help her friend out of a bad time; now I’m a pig for doing a great job of it?

“You don’t want me talking to your mother, do you? Aunt Loretta would be devastated to think her son was a man-whore who used women for sex.” Tracy pushed her hand high on her hip as she spoke.

I wished for a split second that we could go back to being kids, so I could shove her down into the mud puddle behind her. “I know you need someone out there to tend to your animals. Maybe you could offer her a job,” Tracy added.

I did need someone out there making sure the animals were all healthy and happy, but was Charlotte the right candidate for that? My foal, Carlos, hadn’t eaten for days. Even Charlie couldn’t get him to eat.

“I’ll think about it,” I told her and tossed the last load of feed onto my truck.

“Don’t think too long. I’m gonna pay Aunt Loretta a visit later tonight,” she said with her trademark smirk fixed in place.

I rolled my eyes as she walked back across the street. I hated her sometimes, but I knew she was only protecting her friend. It sounded like Charlotte had been down on her luck pretty bad, but that still didn’t explain why she took off if she wasn’t just looking for a one-nighter.

I drove back to the ranch, thinking about that night with Charlotte. We’d had a great time. She wasn’t like than any other woman I’d ever met. I wasn’t sure why I hadn’t called her myself, if for nothing else than just to make sure she’d made it home safe, and to thank her for a great night. It didn’t matter. I was going to call her now. I had to now.

Charlie met me as I pulled up the drive, signaling me toward the barn. I backed my truck up, got out, and started helping him unload the feed. “Carlos isn’t eating still,” he said, speaking of the foal in the barn. He’d had a full checkup from the vet, and as far as we could see, there was nothing wrong—he simply wouldn’t eat.

“I bought some new feed,” I said, grabbing the small bag from the back of my pickup. Charlie walked it over to the foal, and we both knelt beside him while Charlie tried to get him to eat. He wasn’t even interested.

“I think he misses his mother,” he said.

“Nonsense,” I scoffed, trying to push the food on the young foal. Nothing.

“I’ve bought plenty of foals his size and they did just fine,” I insisted.

“Well, there is something wrong. If we don’t figure it out soon, he isn’t gonna make it.”

“I have someone who might be able to help,” I said with a slight smile.

“We already talked to the vet,” he replied.

“She isn’t the vet.”

Charlie’s eyes narrowed, and his lips curled into a smile. “She?” he asked with a smug smile.

I knew my cheeks were burning red, but I shrugged it off as best I could. “Would this ‘she’ be the woman I saw leaving last week?” he asked.

My heart stopped for a moment. “You saw her leave? Did she say anything?” I asked.

“Nope. She looked like she was distressed, and in a hurry.”

“Distressed?” I asked, feeling a sudden surge of guilt rush through my veins.

“I figured it was just another one of your one-night stands,” Charlie said quickly.

“Another one of my one-night stands?” I laughed.

He winked and grabbed a bag of feed before heading to the other stables. I’d had maybe two women out here in the last six months, and neither had stayed the night. I didn’t like Charlie calling Charlotte a one-night stand, even though I had done so myself when talking to Tracy earlier that day.

“So, you like this one?” Charlie asked.

I shrugged, not willing to divulge my feelings to him, or to myself, for that matter.

I went into the house and sat down on the couch where Charlotte and I had first made love. The sweet scent of her perfume still lingered in the room, as if she’d never left. I picked up my phone, started to write a text, and then decided to just call her.

It rang once, twice, and then a third time. My palms sweat as I readied myself to leave a voice mail. “Hello,” her sweet voice answered, echoing through the other end of my phone.

“Good morning, darlin’,” I said.

A silence fell over the phone. “Are you there?” I asked.

“Yes,” she said in a soft, subdued tone.

“I’m sorry I didn’t call sooner,” I said, my voice pleading.

“It’s okay. I’ve been busy here, too,” she said.

I couldn’t tell if she was angry or not. Her voice was sweet, and I wasn’t certain I’d be able to hear any anger within in even if she was fuming inside. “I was wondering if you’d like to go horseback riding this afternoon?” I asked.

Another silent pause.

I shifted in my seat, readjusted my hand on my phone, and tried to calm myself with a deep breath.

“That sounds like fun,” she finally replied.

“Great. You wanna come by about two o’clock and I’ll make us dinner after our ride?”

“I’ll see you then,” she said, and then hung up.

I set the phone down, fell back against the soft cushion, and wondered if I was making the right decision by calling her. What if she didn’t really want more than a one-night stand? What if she did?

Chapter Five

Charlotte

I’d just got off the phone with Tracy when Owen called. I found it a little strange that she just finished telling me she had a feeling he’d be calling. It’d been over a week, and nothing. He’d left me in his bed alone after our night together, probably too scared to face me. It was romantic, sweet, and so different than with any other man. I thought for certain there had been a spark there, something that we’d both felt. But, when you wake up in an empty bed after a night like that, it’s pretty obvious that only one person had felt the earth move.

His voice was so deep, so seductive; it oozed like honey from his lips when he spoke. I could picture him on the other end of the phone, smiling and letting his tongue glide across his full lips as he waited for me to respond.

Had Tracy put him up to it? She could be pretty pushy, and even a little scary sometimes. Maybe she’d got to him. It just seemed a little strange to me that she had just got back into town, and then Owen suddenly called after a week of silence.

Still, I was excited to see him. My heart raced as I dug through my closet for something to wear.

I found a pair of jeans that made my ass look nice, and grabbed a t-shirt to throw on. I shaved, plucked, but forwent the rest of the ritual of trying to be super sexy. I’d done all that before, and even though it got me laid, it still got me left alone, and not called for a week.

My nerves were getting out of control as the time for me to leave drew closer. I thought about calling Tracy, just flat-out asking her if she put Owen up to this, but a part of me was afraid she’d say yes. If she did say yes, I knew I wouldn’t go—I was too stubborn. I knew that, so I didn’t call her. Just for now, I wanted to let myself believe he’d called because he wanted to. If there had been any other reason, I’d find out soon enough.

I pulled up to Owen’s ranch and parked beside his blue pickup. The silver-haired man I’d seen the morning I left was walking toward a small red truck. He lifted his hand and waved to me. I waved back, but felt an instant surge of embarrassment flowing through my veins. Yeah, that was me, walk-of-shame girl, and here I am again, back for more.

“Charlotte,” Owen called out my name as he opened his front door. He wore his cowboy boots, the kind that were worn from hard work, not the kind fake cowboys wore that were shiny and new. His jeans were tight, faded, and hung on him perfectly. My eyes lingered on his muscular arms rippling out of his t-shirt as I got out of my car. Damn, that man is beautiful.

I shut my car door and walked toward the house, where he quickly greeted me on the sidewalk with a warm hug. His arms felt so strong wrapped around me that I wanted to just melt into them. That musky scent of his cologne whispered around me with a mysterious intent. I sucked in a large whiff of him, kissed the side of his neck softly, and pulled back from the hug.

He didn’t let me go; instead, he held me there, just staring into my eyes for what felt like an eternity. “I’m glad you’re here,” he said sweetly.

I was, too.

“I’m sorry I didn’t leave a note that morning,” I said quickly, feeling guilty for walking out the way I did. “I had a ton to do,” I lied.

I’d actually gone home and cried. Not for long, but enough to shake me up for the day. I’d hated feeling like I’d been used, especially by Owen. He’d made me feel so special.

“I understand,” he said, still gazing into my eyes. “I’d gone and got breakfast, actually. If I’d known where you lived, I would’ve dropped it off for you,” he continued.

Wow. I felt like an ass. He went to get breakfast? He hadn’t abandoned me to sneak out without having to face me?

My heart swelled in my chest as all the pain, humiliation, and anger left my body. He wasn’t a player. He wasn’t a bad guy only looking to get laid. I was just impatient and skittish, apparently.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know. I thought you…” I stumbled over my words.

“Left?” he asked with a chuckle in his voice.

I shrugged my shoulders and fought back the tears forming in my eyes. I didn’t want to cry. I had nothing to cry about. I was happy.

“Well, just know I’d never do that to you,” he said , his voice soft and warm as he pulled me in for a tighter hug.

I fell into his arms, listening to the beat of his heart and rocking with the rhythm of his breath.

“Let’s get you on a horse,” he said, leading me toward the stables.

I walked past the first two stables, one with a large white horse, and the other with a small foal with a shiny brown coat. He was snuggled up in the corner on a pile of hay, his eyes droopy, and he little lanky body almost lifeless. “Who’s this?” I asked, unable to pass the poor creature that looked sickly and scared.

“That’s Carlos. We can’t get him to eat,” Owen said.

I opened the stable door and made my way to the little horse. I knelt down beside him and wrapped my arms around him while placing my cheek on his side. He nudged me with his snout, snuggling into my hair as I squeezed him into my arms. He was warm, but shaking. It was obvious he was anxious, scared, or just confused about what he was doing here alone. “You’re a handsome little devil,” I whispered to him, stroking his mane slowly.

He lifted his head, his eyes still sad. My heart ached for him. “Is he sick?” I asked.

Owen knelt down beside me, reaching out to stroke the foal’s head. “The vet couldn’t find anything,” he said sadly.

I reached for the bottle of feed tied by a string from the gate. The foal looked interested, but not enough to reach for it himself. I held him in my arms, sang softly and let him move toward the bottle on his own. I held it under my arm, nuzzling up close to him while petting his head. He eventually lowered his head to the bottle and slowly started drinking. Owen was delighted, his face offering up both shock and awe at the situation. “He just missed his mother,” I said softly.

“That’s what Charlie said,” he chuckled.

The foal ate like he hadn’t in weeks, but I took the bottle away from him before he made himself sick. “He just needs to feel safe while he eats,” I told Owen, who still had his mouth hanging open. The poor foal had been taken from his mother far too early. Owen told me he’d purchased plenty of other foals the same age and they’d done fine, but it was obvious this one wasn’t like the others. It needed nurturing, love, and a lot of patience.

“You are amazing,” he said, shaking his head as he stood.

I took the hand he extended to me and let him pull me to my feet. My body pressed into his as our lips met. I’d missed the sweetness of his kiss, and it was welcomed by my lips as we embraced for what felt like the first time. Our tongues intertwined, our hands roamed each other’s bodies, and our hearts beat in sync. This has to be real.

When we finally pulled apart, our eyes remained locked. He looked confused, scared even, and I felt the same exact way. I wasn’t looking for anything. But, here we were. Was this really happening?

He let me go, taking a deep breath before turning toward the back of the barn. His eyes glistened against the sunlight shining through the slats of wood, his smile warmer than the sun itself.

“Here,” he said, guiding me toward the back stables.

He opened the gate to a beautiful black horse. “Marlo,” he said her name was. She was glorious and regal, but huge.

“You know how to ride?” he asked.

I nodded. “I grew up on a farm,” I replied with a smirk.

He rolled the saddle over her broad back and tightened the straps. I gripped her reins and walked her out of the barn while Owen saddled up his own horse, a large brown-and-white one he called Duke.

“Let’s go, hotshot,” he said, slapping the ass of his horse and taking off. I’d just gotten saddled up, and wasn’t ready, but my instincts kicked in and I slapped Marlo to chase after the pair.

Marlo seemed to enjoy the action, running with a smoothness I thought odd for such a massive horse. Sitting on her back, I could feel the power from her muscles, and the speed she provided was more than a little intimidating. I didn’t like losing, and it was clear that Marlo didn’t either, so I didn’t stop her, and she didn’t offer to stop. She galloped faster and faster, until my fingers began to blister from holding on so tight.

I finally caught him as we hit the trail. He slowed Duke down to a trot and let me ride up beside them. Marlo snorted, obviously not a fan of stopping. “It’s so beautiful out here,” I said, looking around at all the tall trees and rolling hills.

“Yes, it is,” Owen said, looking directly at me when he spoke. I blushed, giggled, and tried to calm my burning cheeks. There was something about him that made me nervous—not in a bad way, but in a way that left me feeling excited and breathless.

“You’re a real smooth talker, aren’t ya?” I teased.

“They say I have a golden tongue,” he teased, rolling his tongue from his mouth to his lips.

“They? Been that many, eh?” I asked, half-joking, half-curious.

His eyes narrowed as he looked at me. It was obvious he wasn’t going to answer that question. In a way, I was glad. Did I really want to know if he’d been with thousands of women?

“I stay too busy for women,” he said with a grin.

He slapped Duke’s ass and kicked into his sides, taking off fast onto the open trail ahead. I sat there a moment on Marlo, dazed as I took in what he just said. He doesn’t have time for women. Was that a hint to not think this was going anywhere?

I kicked my spurs into Marlo’s side and quickly caught up to Duke and Owen. Owen called out for them to stop as we neared a muddy hole in the path, but Duke didn’t listen in time. He pulled back on the reins as Duke splashed into the mud, splashing it all the way up into Owen’s face. I giggled as Marlo halted at the edge of the mess, the horse watching with what appeared to be just as much amusement as I had.

“Duke!” Owen exclaimed, as if it were the horse’s fault. He pulled back hard on the reins, trying to turn him around to get out of the mud pit. Owen was clearly frustrated, and it was distracting him from what he needed to do. He somehow lost control of his horse, and his old pal Duke, who he’d said was like a best friend, started to panic with the lack of control and leadership. Duke lifted up his front legs, arching his back and calling out in fear and frustration as Owen fell from his back and straight into the mud. I laughed, hard. I couldn’t help myself.

The look on Owen’s face was priceless. That face was covered in mud, but I could see his pearly teeth and the whites of his eyes peeking out. “Oh, you think that’s funny, do ya?” he asked playfully.

I nodded. I slid down from Marlo, gripped Duke’s reins, and walked him out of the puddle. Owen sat there in the middle of the mud, now laughing pretty hard himself. “Can you help me outta here?” he asked.

I was still giggling. My body was shaking so hard with laughter that I could barely see. My eyes squinted, teared up, and began to itch as I rubbed them vigorously to calm them. “Seriously?” Owen asked, his tone sarcastic and frustrated.

“I don’t want mud all over me,” I laughed.

I looked around for something to extend to him, anything but my own hand. I found a long twig on the ground, quickly picked it up, and then extended it to Owen to grab. His hand clutched around it tightly; he pulled, tugging me from my feet enough to make me squeal. He laughed at my anxiety, tugging it again, this time harder. I flew toward him, my feet slipped in the mud, and then suddenly I was in Owen’s arms in the middle of the giant puddle. We were covered in mud, so much mud that neither of us wanted to get back on our horses. “We can walk back,” I said, scraping what mud I could from my face, skin, and hair.

We gripped the horse’s reins, headed back toward the house, mostly laughing, but holding hands, and talking a bit as well. I was still stuck on what he had said, about not having time for a woman. I didn’t want to ask him to clarify, or to specify if that included me, as well. Instead, I enjoyed the moment, walked beside him, and just prayed the mud wouldn’t dry me into a statue before I made it to the house to get cleaned up.

“I’m sorry,” Owen muttered as we neared the house.

I laughed. “For what?”

“I didn’t mean for you to get dirty,” he said, sounding somewhat bashful.

I laughed again. I didn’t mind. I actually enjoyed it. I hadn’t laughed so hard in a long time.

“Yes, you did,” I smiled, the mud cracking on my face.

He smirked.

“Hey, it’s cheaper than a day at the spa,” I added, scraping the mud from my cheek.

His eyes lit up, his lips curled into a smile, and then a soft growl escaped his lips and rolled from his throat. “You look pretty damn sexy in all that mud,” he said.

“Oh, so you have a thing for dirty girls?” I teased.

“You betcha,” he laughed. “And, you’re probably the dirtiest girl I’ve ever laid eyes on,” he added with a sly smile.

I reached for him, trying to grip him, but he ran, taking off toward the house. I ran as my mud cracked when I picked up speed, causing me to laugh even harder than before.

When I finally made it to the barn, Owen was holding a garden hose. “Are you serious?” I asked, knowing that water was going to be ice cold. It was a warm day, not a hot one, and that icy water didn’t look too appealing, not even to clean off this mud.

He grinned, turned the faucet to on, and held it over his head. He let out a yelp as the water first hit him, letting me know it was really cold.

Mud rolled down his face, finally clearing his skin and offering up a glimpse of his full, pink lips. I didn’t care that they were muddy. I leaned in, kissed him hard on the mouth, and then pulled back, screaming from the cold water soaring down my back. He’d held the hose over my head while I was trying to be sweet.

Owen apologized, and then promised to keep me warm. He held me in his arms while he let the cold hose water roll between us. He cleaned off the mud as best he could, but then stopped and stared at me with a strange hunger. “You need to take off those clothes,” he said.

We were in the middle of nowhere, his farm stretching out for acres before any neighbors could be found, but it still felt dirty to undress outside. I watched as he pulled away his shirt, and then his boots and pants. He ran the water over them, cleaning the mud from the material and hanging it over the wooden fence. His boots were trashed, so he flushed them out with water and hung them upside down on the gate to dry. “Your turn,” he said with a wicked grin.

I slowly striped out of my t-shirt, and then my jeans and boots. He carefully cleaned the material and hung it on the fence next to his before turning the hose on me. I screamed when the cold water hit my skin, causing him to laugh as I jumped and squirmed.

“I can’t take it,” I yelled out, jumping away from the hose as he tried to clean the mud from my hair. The cold water rolling down the back of my neck made me want to cry.

I could see the outline of his cock in his tight, wet briefs, and it was obvious the cold water had shrunk what used to be a large hunk of meat. I giggled as he caught me staring. His face turned to a frown, and he took the hose to me, spraying me in the belly against my bare flesh. I screamed out, jumped, and he chased me as far as the hose would reach. When I realized he couldn’t get to me, I stopped, laughed, and wiggled my hips to taunt him. It reminded me of one of those old cartoons, where the cat would sneak into the neighbor’s lawn, wake up the angry dog and get chased until the dog’s chain would pull it back. Just like those cartoons, there was always a twist where the cat would come back, thinking it was safe. The dog would move the dog house, or maybe even get off its chain somehow. Well, Owen did something like that when he dropped the hose, his face was filled with intent, and before I could react, he was already on me, lifting me up by my waist, and carrying me away—to where, I wasn’t sure. All I knew was I was no longer safe, and taunting him may have been a bad idea.

The ground bounced beneath me as he slung me over his shoulder. I smacked at his back, kicked my feet, and wiggled, but I couldn’t get away. His grip was too tight, his arms too strong.

Owen jumped from the ground, lifting me even higher into the air. Suddenly we were submerged in the water—at least it was warmer than the hose—and he released me.

“Now, why couldn’t we have just done this in the first place?” I asked, swirling around in the large pond.

He shook his head and smirked. “I didn’t want you dirtying up my pond,” he said with a large grin.

I splashed water toward him, hitting him in the face as he swam toward me. He disappeared under the water and suddenly a tug on my foot pulled me under. Strong hands held my waist, spinning me around until I was dizzy. Finally, they pushed me to the surface where I was face-to-face with him. Our lips met, and my body melted into his. I was so glad he’d called. I was so glad I answered. I was so glad I was wrong.

Chapter Six

Owen

Damn, her body felt so good against mine. It was like she went limp in my arms when we kissed. I could feel her weight pushing against me in the water, her arms growing heavy around my shoulders, and her mouth so delicately parted, and my dick flinched just from the slightest touch of her lips.

“You hungry yet?” I asked, remembering my promise of dinner with the invitation.

Her eyes barely opened, her head tilted back, and a long sigh escaped her lips. “Hungry for what?” she asked softly, her hand sliding between my legs beneath the water.

A growl rolled through my throat and past my lips as her hand clenched around my cock. Her fingers rolled around the loose skin that was tightening quickly with each stroke. My hands reached around her, gripping her ass cheeks and pulling her closer to me. My mouth reached down for her neck, sucking in her delicate skin until she squealed with delight.

She was fun, sexy, and didn’t even mind getting dirty. The fact that she felt so damn good was a bonus.

Her legs wrapped around my waist tightly as I grinded between her legs. I tugged at her bra until the latch let loose and her breasts were freed for my mouth to consume. Hard nipples teased my tongue as I flicked at them, and then sucked just hard enough to make her arch her back. “Damn, you taste good,” I gasped, working my way to the other nipple.

Her hands reached around my waist, tugging at the briefs I still wore. I backed up enough to allow her to lower them into the water. I didn’t see them come up, and I didn’t catch them with my toe, so there they went, sinking to the bottom. I gripped her bra as I slid it from her body, careful not to let it meet the same demise as my drawers. I wrapped the arm strap around my finger, and then worked on removing her panties and carefully twirling them around my finger as well.

My concentration was off with her hand back around my cock. Her strokes were precise, smooth, and with the water gushing around my balls, the sensation to explode was growing fast.

My head fell back as she tightened her grip, her fingers rolled to my balls, tickling them as she stroked me. I lost my grip on her panties, and watched them begin to sink. I reached for them, but missed. “I’m sorry,” I said with an apologetic grin.

“I don’t need ’em,” she said with a smirk.

“No, you don’t,” I agreed, pulling her back around me and letting my cock rest at her opening.

I didn’t wait. I didn’t worry about protection. I pushed into her warm hole, moaning as she tightened around me. My hands gripped her hips and lifted her carefully up and down so that her clit rolled against me. Her eyes closed as they began to roll back into her head. Her lips parted and sweet sounds rolled out into the afternoon sky. The water rippled around us in a beautiful pattern as my cock pushed deeper and deeper into her body.

I let my mouth move to her breasts as she leaned back into the water. I suckled her nipple, biting it gently, causing her to squirm while she worked her hips against mine in perfect synchronicity.  “I’m not gonna last long like this,” I warned, feeling the heat take over my swelling cock.

Her tongue slid across her lips, like the news was more of a challenge than a warning. Her hips rocked into mine a little harder. Her hand reached between my legs and gripped my balls, squeezing them as they tightened upwards into my body. “Fuck,” I gasped, knowing I wasn’t going to hold on much longer.

Her moans grew as I swelled inside of her, and as my orgasm released into her, her own squeezed around me.

My toes barely touched the bottom of the pond, and after holding us both up for so long, I lost footing, sending us both under the water. I pulled us back to the surface quickly, afraid that she’d be upset, but she was laughing. “You tryin’ to kill us?” she teased.

“I’m so glad I called you today,” I admitted, pulling her close to me.

Her once relaxed body seemed to tense as I embraced her in my arms. “You okay, darlin’?” I asked, pulling back to see if her expression matched her body language.

“Yes. Sorry. I’m glad you called today too,” she said with a sweet smile, her body relaxing once again.

“I can’t believe I’m admitting this, but I’m actually glad my cousin is a pushy little busybody,” I said. Her body tensed again, but this time not as tightly. “Don’t tell her I said that or I’ll call ya a liar,” I laughed.

“She had to push ya pretty hard, huh?” she teased.

“Yeah.”

“Me too,” she admitted.

“I mean, once she showed me your picture, I was in. But, I still played hard to get with her,” I laughed.

“Me too,” she admitted with a bright smile.

“So, you’re awfully good with Carlos,” I said.

Her eyes lit up as I mentioned the little foal’s name. “He’s a beauty,” she said.

“I could really use your help with him. Maybe with the other animals on the farm as well,” I offered. She looked hesitant. “I’ll pay you for your time, of course. I know you could use the work,” I said.

Her face changed quickly from pleasant to pissed. It was obvious this wasn’t something I should’ve known about, or mentioned. Fuck!

“What do you mean?” she asked.

I struggled for a moment, trying to come up with a lie. Maybe I just thought she would like the side work, or maybe she told me about her job and forgot. In the end, I decided to go with the truth. “I’m sorry. Tracy told me,” I said.

Her eyes narrowed. “When did Tracy tell you that?” she asked.

“This morning,” I said.

Her lips tightened as she stared over my shoulder into space. It was obvious she was angry, but I had no idea why.

“So, you saw Tracy this morning, and she told you about my job,” she said with a strangely irritated tone.

I was confused. What was the problem? I didn’t care that she lost her job; shit happens. “She wasn’t trying to make you look bad, if that’s what you think,” I insisted.

“No, but I guess she made me look like a charity case,” she snapped.

“Whoa, no one thinks you’re a charity case. Carlos wouldn’t eat, you made him eat, and that’s all.”

“So, we know Tracy is a, what did you call her? A pushy little busybody. Did she shame you into calling me?” she asked.

My heart almost skipped a beat. It was why I called. She was dead on the truth, but that wasn’t the only reason, was it? I wanted to call, but I wasn’t sure I should. With her here now, I knew I wanted her here. I had no idea how to make this end well.

She pulled away from me abruptly, swimming to the shore. She climbed out of the pond, her beautiful, bare ass aimed toward me as she walked toward the barn. I swam to the shore, chased after her, but she was already throwing on her wet, dirty clothes. “Don’t go,” I said, gripping her arm as she started to walk away.

She jerked away from me, but not before I could see the tears in her eyes. I had enough female cousins to know that women’s tears didn’t always represent pain; they sometimes represented anger. And, when a woman cries out of anger, stay outta her way.

I backed up, let go of her arm, and watched her walk toward her car. Charlie and a couple of the other farm crew pulled up as she was peeling her tires to get away from me. I slid on my wet, dirty jeans and walked toward the house.

“Who was that?” Scott asked.

“Nobody,” I snapped.

Charlie gave me a knowing glance, one that appeared to be filled with pity. I didn’t have time to deal with him, or any of them. I needed to get cleaned up and get on with my life. She’d wasted enough of it, and for what?

Chapter Seven

Charlotte

Damn, how could I have been so stupid?

The ride home from Owen’s was uncomfortable, to say the least. When I finally made it home, I stripped at the front door, tossing my dirty clothes in a pile on the front porch before heading inside. Why did I let him get to me again? He was a player, and that’s all he’d ever be.

“Oh, I think he’s gonna be calling you,” Tracy’s voice echoed in my head. Yeah, of course you believed he would be, because you twisted his arm, and probably threatened him, or worse, made him feel sorry for me. Ugh!

I turned on the shower, adjusted the water to hot, and then stepped inside. The water rolled down my hair, leaving a dirty mess at my feet as the rest of the mud finally released from my curls. It felt good to wash it all away. To wash Owen away.

Those beautiful, blue eyes taunted me every time I closed my own. The last image of him, standing there with no clothes on as I drove off, tore through my mind, and the way he made me feel caused my body to quiver each time I let myself remember. Why did he have to be so damn amazing?

I was so mad at Tracy, for whatever she’d said or done to make him call. I’d rather he hadn’t called me than to let me go through this all over again. Was it a game to him, a joke? I couldn’t even fathom what he truly thought of me.

I washed every nook and cranny of my body, finding mud in almost all of them. My hair had to be shampooed twice to get the tangles out, and extra conditioner combed through with my fingers to moisturize it back from where the mud and the sun dried it out. I started to laugh as I remembered how funny Owen had looked being thrown from Duke and into the mud hole. My cheeks hurt as I pushed the laugh back down, deep inside, and away from my mind. It didn’t matter. None of it mattered.

I woke up the next morning feeling refreshed, over the drama of dealing with Owen. I had more important things to do with my life, like find a job. Mr. Thompson needed my help with a pregnant mare later in the week, so at least that was some money to pair with the unemployment that I was finally receiving.

As I thought about the job at hand with the mare, my mind immediately drifted to Carlos. I couldn’t help but wonder if Owen would be able to get him to eat like I had. I’d thought about stopping by a couple days after I’d stormed off, but figured it was best to leave it alone. I didn’t want him to think it had anything to do with him, even though a part of me did still want to see him.

I updated my resume, sent it out to a few local animal shelters, vet offices, and even another zoo that was just about a two hour commute. I decided if I didn’t find something soon, I would start looking further out, and even move if I had to.

Tracy tried calling several times that week, but I didn’t want to talk to her. I was mad, hurt, and a little embarrassed by the entire ordeal. We were best friends, so I knew I’d have to speak to her eventually. When my phone rang as I started out the door to Mr. Thompson’s, I figured it was a good time to answer. “Hey, Tracy,” I said quickly, rushing to my car.

“Why haven’t you answered me?” her voice was filled with panic.

I was sure she’d spoken to Owen, and she knew exactly why I hadn’t answered, otherwise she would’ve been over here checking to see if I was still alive.

“I’ve been busy,” I said calmly.

“Bullshit,” she snapped.

Aha, there ya go. You knew why, so why even ask?

“What do you want? I’m on my way to Mr. Thompson’s,” I said quickly.

I started my car, backed out onto the road, and plugged my phone into the Bluetooth speaker.

“Are you mad at me?” she asked.

“I’m irritated. But I’ll get over it.”

“I was only trying to help,” she pleaded.

“By turning me into a charity case?” I laughed sarcastically.

The roads were dark, and it started to drizzle, making it even harder to see. “I didn’t,” she protested.

“You told him about my job, and then ordered him to call me,” I snapped.

There was silence on the other end of the phone. That silence told me I was right. “So, how did you make him call? Pity, or threats?” I asked.

“He really likes you,” she insisted.

“Oh, yeah. He liked me so much he didn’t call me until you threatened him, right?” I laughed.

“That’s not true,” she said, but I knew it was.

“I really thought we connected, Tracy. You made me look like a fool,” I said, tears beginning to well up in my eyes.

I reached down to pull the plug from the speaker and hang up the phone. My eyes were filling up quick, and I needed my other hand to wipe my face. As I let go of the wheel, I heard a loud horn. “Charlotte!” Tracy’s voice called out through the phone as I swerved to miss the semi headed my way. As I pulled my car back into its own lane, I lost control, and was unable to regain it quickly enough.

I let out a scream as I frantically turned the wheel and slammed on the brakes at the same time. I panicked, and the end result was me heading for a tree.

My eyes opened to bright white lights shining above me. I could hear people stirring around me, but couldn’t make out what they were saying. “Charlotte. Can you hear me?” an unfamiliar voice asked.

I looked up; opening my eyes hurt. A woman with a face mask on, with dark hair pulled into a pony tail, was leaning over me. I could barely see her thin mask move as she spoke. “Yes,” I said with a sore throat.

“It may hurt to talk. You had a breathing tube in when you arrived,” the woman in the mask said in a soft, kind voice.

“Arrived?” I asked, confused.

The last thing I remembered was fighting with Tracy. Then—oh God, the semi, the tree…. “Am I dead?”

The woman over me laughed, and her eyes brightened. “No. You’re in the hospital, though.”

Everything hurt. My toes, my back, even my teeth.

“You were in an accident. Do you remember?” she asked.

I nodded instead of talking.

“You have a broken arm, a couple fractured ribs, but you’re gonna be fine,” she said sweetly. “Is there anyone we can call?” she asked.

I felt the tears welling up in my eyes. My parents were too old, this would scare them to death, and I didn’t have anyone else. I thought about Owen for a split second, but quickly pushed him out of my mind. “No,” I said, swallowing my pain and pushing back my tears.

“Your arm is broken pretty badly. We have a surgeon coming in to operate, but we’ll need to keep you here overnight,” she said.

It didn’t matter.

“Mr. Thompson,” I mumbled as she pushed another dose of pain killers through my IV.

“Mr. Thompson?” she asked.

I was fading quickly. I remember nodding, at least I think I did. Then, I was out.

“Good morning, Charlotte,” said a sweet older woman who was standing over my bed. She wore blue scrubs, similar to the ones the other nurse had been wearing the first time I had come to. I was in a room, not the ER, and the sun was shining through my window. “How long have I been out?” I asked, my throat still sore, but better.

“At least twelve hours,” she said.

I felt relief swarm over me. I was afraid it’d been days. I was so dazed, so confused, I was still piecing everything together. “There is a visitor outside waiting to see you,” the nurse said.

My heart jumped at the thought of it possibly being Owen, but I knew I hadn’t told anyone to call him. There would be no reason he’d come looking for me, so I calmed down. “Sure,” I said softly.

I rolled over to my side so I could scoot myself up on the bed with my good arm. It ached, causing me to groan. The nurse quickly moved toward me, returning me to my back and telling me to stay put. “The surgeon will be here shortly.”

She disappeared from my room, and within a few minutes, Tracy appeared. “Charlotte, I was so worried about you,” she said, rushing to my side.

I groaned with pain as she plopped on my bed. She quickly jumped up. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for everything,” she said.

“It’s okay,” I said with a smile.

“I promise you that I pushed him, but only because I knew he liked you, really liked you,” she said, returning to the topic that almost got me killed.

“It doesn’t matter,” I said.

“It does. It does matter. He thought you just wanted a one-night stand. A night to forget about Bobby. That’s why he didn’t chase after you,” she pleaded.

“He’s been hurt before. He knows what it feels like to be cheated on, lied to, betrayed,” she added.

He’d never mentioned any other woman, so I assumed there had never been one, at least not one that had meant anything to him. I was certain there were plenty of one-night stands, though. Like me.

“He’d kill me if he knew I told you this,” she said softly.

I was suddenly interested in what she had to say. My heart ached for Owen, and I needed to know there was a reason he let me down, any reason.

“He was engaged to his high school sweetheart. She was royal bitch, beauty queen snob. He worshipped her and worked his ass off to give her everything she wanted. When he bought that farm as a wedding gift, she threw a fit, telling him she’d rather die than live on a farm. He was putting it up for sale, his dream. He was giving it up for her, but thankfully, he caught her in the barn fucking one of the farm hands before the sale was finalized,” Tracy whispered so the nurses couldn’t hear.

“Is that true?” I asked.

She nodded. “Please, don’t tell him I told you.”

I shook my head. I had no reason to throw her under the bus with Owen. Besides, I certainly didn’t want to bring up anything that would hurt him.

“I had to push him, Char. He didn’t know how you felt, but I knew if you stayed that night, you must have really liked him,” she added.

I smiled, opened my arms, and screamed as Tracy leaned in to give me a hug. “I’m sorry,” she stammered, pulling away quickly.

I laughed, but that hurt too. “Mr. Thompson,” I said abruptly, remembering I needed to let him know what happened.

“I already handled it,” Tracy said.

“How?” I asked, wondering who else could’ve helped with the pregnant mare on such short notice.

“I sent Owen,” she said.

“How’s the mare and foal?” I asked.

She smiled. “They are doing great. Owen wanted me to tell you that Carlos is eating now, and to thank you for what you did,” she said.

“Is he here?” I asked.

Her face changed to a sad expression as she shook her head. “I’m sorry. He isn’t.”

“Good morning, Charlotte. You ready to get this arm patched up?” The question has come from a man with a white coat as he entered my room.

Dr. Jack, his tag read. I wasn’t ready. I wanted to talk to Owen. To tell him I was sorry for storming out. “How long will this take?” I asked frantically.

“You have somewhere pressing to be?” he asked with a laugh.

I looked at Tracy, giving her the look that hopefully said everything I needed to before the nurse wheeled my bed out of the room and down the hall. “It’ll all be okay,” she said, blowing me a kiss as I was pushed into the elevator.

Chapter Eight

Owen

“Owen?” I turned to see Tracy standing over me. My eyes opened. I took a look around, realizing I was still in the hospital waiting room.

“What are you doing here?” she asked.

I slid up in my seat, stretched, and then reached for my cold coffee sitting on the table next to me. “Is she in surgery yet?” I asked.

“They just took her back. Have you been here all night?” Tracy asked.

I nodded, sipped my coffee. “I better get home,” I said, quickly standing and trying to escape the conversation I didn’t want to have. “How long until she’s back?” I asked.

“They said about four hours, then two in recovery, before she’s back in her room,” she said.

“Cool,” I said, patting her on the back as I started to walk out.

Of course, she was behind me, and then beside me. Miss Pushy Busybody wasn’t going to let things go that easily. “When did you get here?” she asked.

“After I left Mr. Thompson’s.”

“And you haven’t left since?” she asked with that sappy tone in her voice and eyes to match.

“I fell asleep. That’s all,” I insisted. Her eyes batted in my direction. “Wipe that sappy look off your face,” I said, pushing open the exit doors.

“She asked about you,” she said, following me to my truck.

I stopped at the door, listening to her tell me about how she thought I viewed her as a charity case, and how it was all Tracy’s fault. “It’s not your fault,” I told her.

I climbed into my truck, started the engine, and winked at my overly involved cousin. “Are you coming back when she gets out of surgery? I know she’d love to see you,” she said.

I waved, pulled out of my spot, and headed down the road. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do. I was worried about her, that’s all. Why did it have to be anything other than that?

Charlie walked out of the barn as I pulled up. “How is she?” he asked.

“A few broken ribs, a broken arm, but she’ll live,” I answered.

We walked back into the barn to check on Carlos. He was strong, eating on his own, and seemed happy to see me. I laughed when he shoved his nose against my arm as I walked into his stable. “He’s doin’ much better,” I said.

“Charlotte has the magic touch,” he smiled.

Yes, she does. More than he’ll ever know.

“So, she make it out of surgery?” he asked.

“She’s in there now.”

“You headin’ back up there after she’s out?” he asked.

What is with everyone?

“Probably not,” I replied, gripping a handful of grain to toss in Carlos’s bin.

He shook his head, narrowing his eyes on me as he watched my every move. “What?” I asked.

“You’re being stubborn,” he insisted.

“How do ya figure?” I asked, half-smiling as I spoke.

“You know you like this girl,” he said.

“Look, I’m not the one who keeps walking out,” I defended.

“It seems to me she’s been hurt pretty bad. Sounds like someone else I know,” he said.

My stomach flipped upside down. I knew he was referring to me, and I knew it was about Lana. He had been there for all of it, except the fucking my fiancée part. Thank God he’d had enough sense not to take part in that fiasco. He was the only true friend I really had. “It’s not about Lana,” I said calmly. “I’m over that,” I insisted.

I was over it, or at least, I was over her. Maybe I did still have some trust issues to get over, but it still wasn’t me that walked out or ran out. It hurt like hell when I got home that day to find her already gone, and it wasn’t no walk in the park when she grabbed her clothes and left me at the pond. I wasn’t ready for that kind of pain again. I was doing just fine without it.

“I’m too busy for a relationship,” I snorted.

“Bullshit,” Charlie scoffed. “I’ve watched you night after night go into the lonely, empty house and eat a sandwich in front of the TV. You don’t go out, you don’t spend any time with friends, and you certainly don’t date. You need a life, Owen. You deserve one,” he argued.

“You’re my friend. And I work all day, so yeah, I’m too tired to go out,” I snapped.

“You need more than just a friend in your life. And, this place, hell, you’ve got it running like a well-oiled machine. You don’t need to work so hard anymore, you know that,” he said.

He was right. The ranch was finally running smoothly. After years of hard work, the majority of it was now self-sustaining. What did need done, Scott and Charlie could take care of without my help. “I like working out here,” I said.

He nodded. I watched his eyes shift back and forth on me as he leaned against the stable gate.

“This was your dream. But, your dream included a family. You chose the wrong girl, that’s all. But, looks like you found the perfect one now,” he said.

“Nobody’s perfect,” I chuckled.

Carlos continued eating as I brushed his mane. Watching her nuzzle him, caress him, and offer her maternal spirit to nurture him to health had been pretty spectacular, almost perfect.

“She loves animals, she’s beautiful, smart, doesn’t mind getting dirty, and for whatever reason, she seems to really like you,” he said with a smile.

I stared into the old man’s eyes. They were filled with wisdom. I knew that. I didn’t want to listen, but I knew he was right.

“I’m heading home,” he said, patting me on the back.

“It’s Sunday, and I want to spend some time with my wife, maybe even the kids if they aren’t too busy,” he said, winking as he walked out of the barn. “Enjoy your sandwich,” he called out as he opened his truck door.

My heart ached. I was filled with confusion. Should I give it one more try? What if she runs away again? It will hurt a thousand times worse the next time if I let her get any closer to my heart.

I was a mess from birthing a foal, so I patted Carlos on the head and went into the house to wash up. A hot shower, some breakfast, and maybe a fresh cup of coffee would clear my mind. Then I’d know what to do.

Chapter Nine

Charlotte

My eyes opened in another bright room. The walls were painted a clean white, the curtains hanging on the large window were drawn to let the sunlight in, and everything looked sterile.

“You’re awake,” a nurse said, leaning down to make eye contact. “How do you feel?” she asked.

I couldn’t feel anything. I tried to speak, but that familiar soreness was back. “Don’t speak if it hurts. Just nod,” she said. “Are you in any pain?”

I shook my head.

“Can you feel this?”

I felt her poke my arm. I nodded.

“Great.” She disappeared.

My arm was now wearing a large cast. A pin stuck out of my wrist with a large, pink ball on the end of it. Ugh. How am I going to find a job now?

The doctor, Doctor Jack, walked into my room. He was smiling, so I assumed that was a good sign. He shuffled through my chart, pausing to look up at me occasionally, and then inspected my arm, admiring his work with a smile. “Everything looks great,” he said. “The surgery went very well. You’ll have the pins removed in six weeks, after that, another couple weeks and you should be back to new. I don’t see any reason to keep you. The nurses will get your discharge papers ready and explain your at-home care instructions,” he said quickly, and then rushed out of the room before I could ask any questions.

I tried to scoot up, but I couldn’t. The nurse came back in, holding some papers. “We are going to discharge you. Do you have anyone waiting to take you home?” she asked.

“I’ll call a cab,” I said quietly.

She gave me a look of pity, one that I didn’t need right in that moment. That was what had got me into this situation in the first place: pity. “There’s no one I can call for you?” she asked.

I shook my head.

I knew I could call Tracy, but I didn’t see the need. I could get a cab. It was just a broken arm and a few broken ribs. “You really need someone with you during the first few hours after surgery. The medication is pretty strong, and we can’t have you trying to do something that could destroy the surgeon’s work,” she said, tilting her head sideways as she smiled.

“Tracy,” I mumbled.

Her smile widened as she gripped the papers. “Awesome. Give her a call, and I’ll speak to her,” she said, handing me my cell phone from a plastic bag containing my belongings.

“Where are my clothes?” I asked.

“I’m sorry. They had to cut them off of you when you came in,” she frowned.

My throat hurt to talk, but I wanted to scream. What was I supposed to wear home? This gown with no back?

I found Tracy’s number and handed the nurse my phone when it started ringing. I heard her answer, and her voice echo through the speaker. The nurse explained that I needed a ride home, and someone to care for me for a few hours, possibly overnight. “Of course. I’ll be right there,” Tracy’s voice echoed into the room.

My body relaxed, leaning back into the stiff mattress on the hospital bed as the nurse stuffed my phone back into my bag.

“Do not wrap anything around your body to splint your ribs. Practice soft coughing and breathing exercises to avoid a collapsed lung, and apply ice as needed to reduce pain. It looks like the doctor gave you Percocet for pain, so that will work for both your arm and your ribs. Take it as prescribed, and with food. You should be back here in six weeks to get your pins removed, and by then your ribs should be healed, allowing you to go back to your normal lifestyle,” the nurse rattled off so many instructions I could barely keep up.

“Six weeks?” I asked, feeling my eyes well up with tears of frustration. “I don’t have anyone to take care of me for six weeks,” I said, fighting the urge to sob.

“Yes, you do,” I turned to see Owen standing in my doorway.

My mouth fell open, but I couldn’t speak.

“She’s in good hands,” Owen said, taking the papers from the nurse’s hand.

His tall, muscular frame stood over me, his smile brightening the already well-lit room. I stared into his blue eyes, trying to figure out if I was dreaming. I had to be dreaming.

“Tracy said she’s coming to pick me up,” I mumbled.

“I told her to stay home,” he said sweetly.

He fumbled through the papers, and then smiled. “Looks like you’ll have to stay with me for a while,” he said.

“I can’t,” I protested.

“You don’t think I can take care of you?” he asked, his eyebrow rising high on his forehead.

I smiled. “It’s too much. Why would you even want to?” I asked.

My head was spinning. I was still loopy from the medicine. This had to be a dream.

“You just rest,” he said.

“Well, hello. Did you not go home at all?” a brunette nurse asked Owen as she walked into my room.

“Yeah, I went home and cleaned up,” he said with a warm smile.

“I saw you sleeping in the lobby when I came in at six. The triage nurse told me you’d been out there all night,” she said, looking at me with a smile. “He must really love you,” she added, and then handed him a paper to read on rib fractures.

“You were here all night?” I asked after the nurse had left us alone.

“I came after I left Mr. Thompson’s,” he said.

“And stayed here all night, for me?” I asked, still in shock.

He didn’t speak. His smile told me everything. My heart swelled in my chest, causing my ribs to ache. I didn’t care. The pleasure was worth the pain.

“I brought you some clothes,” he said quickly, shoving a bag onto the bed.

“You went to my house?” I asked.

“I bought em’. I figured you’d want something comfortable. It’s just sweat pants and a t-shirt. Socks, underwear—nothing sexy, just cotton ones,” he said, blushing as he spoke.

That had to be the sweetest thing anyone had ever done for me. “Oh, and Tracy called your parents. They know you’re okay, and that you’ll be staying with me. She’ll give them the address so they can come by after we get you settled,” he said like it was nothing.

“You seriously want me to stay with you for six weeks?” I asked.

“For starters. Then, I’d really like to work on forever,” he said with a smile.

He pulled the clothes he bought from out of the bag and placed them on the bed. “Can I help you?” he asked.

I nodded, trying my best to contain my excitement. I wanted to scream out with joy, even though it would hurt like hell. He was gentle and patient as he helped me into my new clothes. I giggled as he pulled my panties on; they were not sexy, he had that right, and about two sizes too big. “I don’t understand women’s sizes,” he said, blushing.

The t-shirt, sweat pants, and socks were perfect, and he even had a pair of tennis shoes in the bag, although they were also about two sizes wrong, only too small. “I have my boots,” I said with a grin.

He slid them on my feet, telling me I was the sexiest woman he’d ever seen in a pair of sweats with cowgirl boots. I knew I looked ridiculous, but it didn’t matter. All that mattered now was that Owen wanted to work on forever…and I thought maybe I did, too.

Loading me into Owen’s pickup truck proved to be a task. The nurse helped him hoist me up into the cab, and then patted me on the leg to wish me luck before closing the door.

“I don’t want you doing this because you feel like you have to, or that it’s the right thing to do,” I protested as Owen climbed into the driver’s side of the truck.

He laughed. “Trust me, I’m not that guy. The only reason I’m doing this is because I want to do this,” he said.

I leaned back in the seat, watching the road go by as we made our way to Owen’s ranch. When we pulled up to the house, the older man whom I’d seen a couple times before was standing at the front door.

“I thought you were going home,” Owen said as he climbed out of the cab.

“Yeah, well, I thought you could use a hand with Charlotte,” he said.

He knew my name. I knew his was Charlie because Owen talked so highly about him. Did that mean he was talking about me?

Owen opened the door and smiled. “You ready for this?” he asked.

I gritted my teeth and took his hand, slowly lowering myself to the ground. Charlie smiled as I made it to my feet without crying. “You okay to walk?” he asked.

I nodded.

He helped us into the house, and then asked if there was anything we needed. I heard Owen talking to him at the door as I sat on the large couch where we first made love. “You made the right decision. You deserve to be happy,” Charlie said softly.

“I think if I’m gonna be happy, this one here is the one to make it happen,” Owen said.

The door shut, and Owen made his way back to me. He sat on the couch, close, but not too close. “I didn’t even ask you if this is what you wanted,” he said, sounding apologetic.

“Yes. It is,” I admitted. “Just until I can take care of myself, though,” I insisted.

“We’ll see how it goes,” he smiled.

“I mean, after all, you’ll be working here, so it just makes sense to stay. You won’t be able to drive for a while,” he added.

“Do you really want to do this?” I asked.

His eyes narrowed, his lips curled into a smile as he nodded. “Since the moment I laid eyes on you,” he said.

Epilogue

Charlotte

The sky was blue, with pink swirling throughout the white clouds that floated like cotton above. Owen spread a blanket on the ground in a tall patch of grass, and helped me carefully lower myself onto it.

It was a beautiful day, one so beautiful I couldn’t remember one better. I had everything I’d ever wanted.

The warm summer air blew against my skin, the sun kissed at my face. I squinted out into the field where Carlos grazed, fully grown and healthy. Owen planned on selling him after he raised him, but I’d fallen in love; we both had.

Everything had fallen into place, just like a fairy tale.

“Do you want some fruit?” Owen asked, opening the picnic basket he’d packed.

I smiled, nodded, and then watched as he carefully dug through the basket for my fresh, sliced apples. He sat down beside me, opening the container to pull out a slice. He didn’t let me take it from his hand, but instead fed it to me.

He really was an amazing caretaker. The scar on my arm from the surgery reminded me every day of how well he took care of me. He’d stayed by my side, helped me dress, bathe, and even eat when I was having trouble. I’d never once felt like a charity case, like something he had to do. He expressed so much love in everything he’d done for me; it was obvious his intentions were true.

The sun caught my ring, bouncing off the diamond and making a rainbow of light around us. He reached for my hand, stared lovingly at the ring he’d slid onto my finger four years ago, and smiled. “I still can’t believe it’s all real,” he said.

I laughed, remembering how I’d thought it was a dream when he’d come into my hospital room.

“It’s real,” I said, gripping his hand and moving it to my belly.

His face stiffened as he rested his hand on the bump of my belly. The baby kicked, strong and hard, causing him to grin with such enthusiasm I couldn’t help but laugh with joy.

“What will we name him?” he asked.

I let my head fall back against my shoulders and took in the beauty of the sky while I pondered that question. “Charlie,” I said softly.

Owen gripped my hand, squeezing it tightly in his. I knew that was what he wanted. I wanted it too. Charlie had become like a father to me over the last few years. He gave me away at our wedding when my father was too ill to walk down the aisle, he took care of me when I was sick, and most importantly, he was the one who had pushed Owen to me, telling him he deserved to be happy.

I knew the day Owen had put on his black coat and tie to attend Charlie’s funeral, it was the hardest day of his life. He had been Owen’s best friend—a brother, a father, a mentor. Charlie had told him how proud he was of him before he passed. “I’ve got no regrets. I had a great life. And, there’s nothing better than knowing you helped someone else get what they deserve, as well.” That had been one of the last things he’d ever said to Owen. It stuck with him, and I knew it would for eternity.

“You’re so beautiful,” Owen said, leaning in and softly kissing my cheek. “What if it’s a girl?” he asked, giving me a curious look.

I laughed, knowing it didn’t matter. “Charlie,” I said with a smirk.

He gripped my face, turning me toward him. His lips met mine, soft, and then hard and passionate as he moved his body over me. I rolled to my back, letting him caress my skin, first my breasts, which were now full and firm, and then my belly, which was beginning to really show my pregnancy.

His mouth kissed my neck, slowly moving down to my breasts. He stopped to kiss my belly, placing his cheek against my skin gently before going even lower, between my legs.

His hands pushed my skirt up, and then pulled my panties away from my skin to expose my delicate flesh.

My body reacted to his eyes with tingles of electricity rolling through my veins. I loved how blue his eyes were in the summer sun, and how hungry they looked as he peeked up from between my legs.

Warm, wet laps of his tongue teased my inner thighs, causing me to moan out into the hot air. His lips wrapped around my clit, tugging on it gently, and then sucking it into his mouth to massage it with his tongue. The sucking motion made my back arch, and my breasts feel as if they’d explode with excitement. He slid a finger inside of me, working it slowly in circles, left to right, as he sucked on my sensitive pearl.

It didn’t take him long to bring me to orgasm, my body exploding with pleasure in delicious waves. His tongue worked hard to lap up my juices, his finger never stopping the sweet swirling motion inside my pulsating pussy.

I reached up, gripping his pants and pulling at them until they opened. His cock was hard and ready as I stroked it in my hand. “On your back,” I ordered.

He quickly obliged, laying on his back, his cock stiff and standing at attention. My mouth lowered to him, taking only the tip in with my lips. My tongue flicked at his tiny hole, teasing him as my hand rolled his balls with soft, massaging motions. I widened my jaw, lowering my mouth onto him, sucking hard as I swallowed his shaft. He growled, arched his back, and gripped my hair between his fingers to guide me at the pace he liked.

He was close, real close, but I wasn’t ready for our fun to end. I sucked hard, pushing with my cheeks around his cock, squeezing his balls in my hand, and then I released my grip suddenly. He shook as I calmed him with a caressing hand on his rock-hard abs.

His eyes opened, staring at me hungrily; he pulled me toward him. My body spread over him, my pussy resting against his hard cock as his mouth consumed mine. The taste of our sex mixed together on my tongue was like a delicious cocktail. His hand reached between my legs, guiding the tip of his cock into me, and my body lowered, taking him in as I let out a moan.

“Damn, you’re sexy, darlin’,” Owen’s voice was deep and sultry as he spoke.

Even though my belly was growing, Owen always made me feel sexy. I rocked my hips into his, pushing him deeper and deeper into me. The sensation of my clit rubbing against his pelvis made my legs quiver, and my skin prickled with excitement. His hands reached out, caressing my breasts; his fingers rolled around my nipples, tugging to make me cry out his name. They were so sensitive that the slightest touch made me want to come; with him inside me, tugging on the sensitive skin, there was no stopping the orgasm that roared through my body.

Owen gripped my hips, holding me still while my body quivered and pulsated around him. He smiled, staring into my eyes as my orgasm blasted around him. When I finally calmed down, his eyes rolled back into his head, and his own explosion started. I loved feeling every last pulse of his pleasure surge through my body.

I climbed off of him and collapsed onto my back to catch my breath. He rolled to his side, caressed my full belly, and stared into my eyes.

I was lost in those baby blues as I allowed my body to relax in the warm sun. Owen Michael Martin had proven not only to be an amazing man, but an amazing husband—and I knew he would be an amazing father. “I love you,” I sighed, closing my eyes as I daydreamed about our future.

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This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places and incidents are products of the writer's imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locales or organizations is entirely coincidental.

Copyright © 2017 Ivy Jordan