Table of Contents

Copyright

BUCKING WILD

PROLOGUE

CHAPTER ONE

CHAPTER TWO

CHAPTER THREE

CHAPTER FOUR

CHAPTER FIVE

CHAPTER SIX

CHAPTER SEVEN

CHAPTER EIGHT

CHAPTER NINE

CHAPTER TEN

CHAPTER ELEVEN

CHAPTER TWELVE

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

CHAPTER NINETEEN

CHAPTER TWENTY

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

CHAPTER THIRTY

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX

CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN

CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT

CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE

CHAPTER FOURTY

BUCKING BAREBACK

CHAPTER ONE

CHAPTER TWO

Violet Paige

TURN OVER

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Luke

Alexa

SIDELINED

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Natalia

Sam

DIRTY GAME

Prologue

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EPILOGUE

Bucking Wild

Published By Maggie Monroe

Copyright © 2017 Maggie Monroe

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places or events are entirely the work of the author. Any resemblance to actual persons, events, or places is entirely coincidental.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. Please purchase only authorized editions and do not participate in piracy of copyrighted materials.

BUCKING WILD

PROLOGUE

What do you do when the lies catch up to you? When the truth blows in like a hurricane and destroys everything you tried to protect?

I fucking lost her. And there’s no one else to blame. The escape I built on bricks of lies became my reality. She was never supposed to be a part of it. She wasn’t supposed to be trapped inside those walls.

I wasn’t looking for salvation, but it found me anyway the day I met her. My hope. My redemption. She was the most perfect part of my life, and I let her be torn apart in the wreckage.

I’d always been too cocky. And this time it finally caught up to me. It cornered me. Imprisoned me.

She could have saved me. If only I had told the truth. Started with honesty instead of lies.

I fucked it up and I don’t know if there’s any way to go back to the beginning. Back to the place where I could make it right. The place where I could be a better man.

I might be too arrogant for my own good—even hers—but my arrogance is what I need to fight for her. Because I never lose. I don’t give up. And I’ll do whatever it takes to prove this time, I’m right.

CHAPTER ONE

Ben

I grabbed the first thing I could find in the mini-bar. Tequila. It burned going down. I sputtered, but finished two bottles, tossing them on the floor.

My phone buzzed. I ignored it every time it rang. The calls and texts were all the same. Had I seen the story on Becs?

Who the fuck hadn’t seen the story? It was everywhere. I couldn’t avoid it. No one could.

I looked at the empty bottle in my hand. Wasn’t that what we drank in Cabo? Straight tequila after we started on a few rounds of margaritas?

I remembered watching her dance that night. She was free and wild. Her dark hair swirled around her, while she kept one eye on me. She shook her hips with promises of what was to come. That’s what she did. She teased. She tempted. And fuck, did she deliver.

I knew what I was getting into with Rebecca Campbell. And somehow, I couldn’t stop myself. She was gorgeous, but in that way most actresses were.

We drank more margaritas while the mariachi played. She even coaxed me onto the dance floor. My hands wrapped around her tiny waist, pulling her to me. She smiled sweetly, placing her palm over my heart. We swayed back and forth at that cantina, pretending we were both different people. I imagined she was an angel and she convinced herself I could love her.

We worked together on one movie. I swore she soaked her lips in honey before our scenes, just to lure me in. I couldn’t shake the taste of her kiss.

I could see the green glitter in her eyes when we stumbled into that Cabo suite. She was drunk. We both were. But damn it, if she wasn’t fun. Becs could party.

I peeled the sundress from her arms, watching her perky breasts bounce before I descended on them. She had perfect tits. Every part of her was designed without flaw. Even the way she purred when she came. Dripping with sweat, reeling in one orgasm after another, and Becs looked like a damn movie star underneath me. A sex goddess with the glow of a model.

“Don’t stop fucking me, Ben,” she begged as I slammed into her. “You feel so good. I love it. God, I love it. Don’t stop.”

“Oh, I won’t, darlin’.” I grinned.

Her ankles hooked around my neck and I angled deeper, driving home. She grabbed the headboard, breathing erratically as I pumped in and out, taking us to the peak.

We didn’t care that the windows were open and the curtains fluttered on the balcony. Sex like this was raw and electric. Sex with Rebecca was always wild and spontaneous.

“Fuck, baby,” I groaned, looking into her bright eyes.

She wore a cat-like smile. She had me where she wanted me, but there was no denying I liked where I was—so did my cock. The margaritas erased any inhibitions we had left and we clung to each other, riding harder and faster.

We stayed in the suite all weekend. I knew everything about her body. How to make her come harder than any man ever had. Where the birthmark was on her inner thigh. How she cooed when she sucked my dick. The way she liked being taken from behind more than any other position. Hell, I memorized everything about that girl.

But that was Cabo. Months ago—basically a lifetime in Hollywood relationships. I emptied another bottle of tequila. Becs and I hadn’t seen each other in weeks. I couldn’t remember if we talked yesterday. I hadn’t been very good at checking in. I was a shitty boyfriend.

I fell back on the empty bed, picking up my phone to scroll through the latest headlines. I was wrapping a shoot in Atlanta, and she was supposed to be extending a shoot in Hawaii with a girls’ weekend. I told myself that’s why I hadn’t called her—I tried to respect her girl time.

Girls’ weekend my ass.

She had screwed me. Fucked another man on vacation. And the entire world knew it.

I exhaled. I wasn’t taking the blame for this.

I didn’t think I could stay here. I couldn’t face the press. The questions. The looks of pity and embarrassment. Flying back to Hollywood wasn’t going to give me what I wanted either. The press would camp out at my Texas ranch. There was no escape from being tied to her. Her headline was now mine. I owned that decision the first time I fucked her.

I had been warned. But I didn’t want anything more than fun and fucking, so I ignored the cautionary tales. My star was bigger than hers. What did it matter? I liked having a good time. I misread her. We were never on the same page.

But now she had a way to drag me through the mud. To throw me into a scandal I wanted nothing to do with. I didn’t have to be in a room with her right now to know she loved this attention. She didn’t love anything as much as she loved a headline.

I felt the walls closing in. I dropped my phone.

I needed to sober up if I was getting out of here. I started the coffee and turned the shower on.

***

New Bern. It was only one exit ahead. The burning sensation had crept to both eyes. Eight hours of driving had that effect. There had only been one stop since I set off this morning, and I had made that as quickly as possible—enough time to stretch my legs and convince myself heading north was the right direction.

I rubbed my eyes before reaching for the cell phone.

There were ten missed calls and too many texts to count. I gripped the phone in my fist. The tightening in my chest wrapped under my ribs and pressed against my sternum, forcing the clamped breath I was holding to escape through my mouth.

When I saw the city’s name splayed across the sign in front of me, my hand relaxed its hold on the phone. Clara wouldn’t expect my call, much less expect me to be only miles from her hometown. She always talked about New Bern as if it was the most idyllic place in the world to grow up and live.

The entire time we dated, I never visited. Maybe that was part of the problem. She had tried. She had invited me. It was another reminder I couldn’t hold a relationship together. What kind of man didn’t go to this girlfriend’s hometown? This one. The selfish one. The one who would rather party and have a good time than deal with something serious.

And what was I doing now? Dragging Clara into this like a complete asshole. Was she really the one who could help me escape?

Pausing before making the call, I debated whether this was such a good idea. Clara would help. She would want to help, but she didn’t deserve this fucked up mess. I tossed the phone into the open passenger’s seat, and twisted the knob on the radio. Clara would forgive me. She had to be the most laid-back girl I’d ever dated. It was the reason we had ended things as friends. Hell, she might not ever know I had driven by without stopping.

It wasn’t that I didn’t want to see her. She might be the only person who could understand why I had to make a run for it. She dealt with the same kind of shit I did. She was the most famous person in her town. Novelists-turned-screen writers weren’t exactly common in North Carolina. She’d get why I had to run. Let’s be honest, that’s what this was—an escape plan—a full-blown sprint to find freedom.

Later.

I would call her later. With the New Bern exit two miles behind me, I eased into the next convenient store I spotted on the side of the road. My legs could use another stretch.

A woman selling peaches at a makeshift produce stand smiled as I pulled the brim of my baseball cap firmly over my eyes and popped the cover on the gas tank. I didn’t think she recognized me. At least, she hadn’t reached for a cell phone. Her attention was on restacking a basket of peaches that had fallen too far forward.

The tension eased out of my shoulders. I leaned against the blue Jeep that had become my travel companion only ten hours ago. It didn’t matter that I paid too much for it. Fifteen thousand dollars cash in exchange for freedom was a bargain. Hopefully, the extra money would be enough to keep the seller from calling the tabloids.

“What can I get you?” she asked.

I eyed the rows of blueberries, peaches, and a carton of okra. “What do you recommend?”

She adjusted her visor. “You don’t sound like you’re from here.” She cocked her head.

“No, ma’am, I’m not.” I swallowed hard, waiting for the inevitable—an autograph and a selfie shot request. I would have to work on camouflaging my accent. It wouldn’t be the first time I had disguised my deep Texas drawl.

She leaned over the table separating us, and placed the side of her hand against her cheek to shield the words from any eavesdroppers. “If you won’t say anything, I won’t say anything.” Her forehead furrowed. “These peaches are from South Carolina. We say everything’s local, but it’s not.”

I feigned shock and winked at the lady. “Your secret is safe with me.” I reached for one and tossed it in the air. “So, I guess I’ll take some of those illegal South Carolina peaches.”

“Good choice.” She placed a basket on the scale and scribbled the weight and price on a receipt. “That will be six dollars.” She picked up each peach and placed it inside a paper bag.

My wallet was halfway around my hip when I remembered all I had was one hundred dollar bills. Damn it.

“I—uh—do you take hundreds?” I pulled one of the crisp bills from the wallet. The plan was to use only cash, that way no one would see my name on credit cards or ask for my ID. Total anonymity was the game.

“For a basket of peaches?” The woman looked at the currency as if I had tried to pay with yen.

I smiled, realizing the predicament we were both in. I hadn’t bothered to bring anything with me other than a duffle bag and my phone. The longer I stood there, the more I wanted to try one of those infamous peaches. Sure, I was only twenty yards from the convenient store, but I wasn’t about to undo all of the hard work that had gone into perfecting these sculpted abs with a bag of greasy chips.

“How ‘bout this, darlin’? You keep the change, and I’ll take two baskets of peaches.” I placed the bill next to the register.

“Oh, I can’t take that.” The pitch in her voice climbed an octave.

I didn’t give her a second chance to argue. I grabbed another basket, dumped the fruit into the paper bag, and strolled back to the Jeep. I cranked the ignition and maneuvered onto the highway.

The Jeep was headed east. I wasn’t sure where the road would take me. Eventually, I would run out of road—the ocean was just hours in front of me. I reached into the paper sack and seized the first peach. As I bit into the soft, fuzzy fruit, a trickle of juice ran down my chin. I wiped the nectar from my face with the back of my hand.

I smiled. Something about not having a destination felt better than having one.

***

The darkness wrapped the air and sank into every open space. Other than a few blinking lights on the horizon, it was black. I rolled my shoulders up and back. All the muscles in my arms were tight from twelve hours of driving. The ferry ride was advertised as fifty-five minutes long, so I stepped from the Jeep and strolled to the side of the vessel loaded with cars.

I had made the last one of the night. The ferry service stopped at midnight. I intended to stay in the last coastal village I found at the southern tip of the Outer Banks, but when the road ran out, the waterway could take me one more leg. The extra distance was like the last drink I couldn’t turn down. I needed it.

The salt air whipped past me as I leaned against the railing. How had my life come to this? I was running. Running from everyone, everything. I shoved my hands in my front pockets and rocked back on my heels. There had to be a way to get back in control.

It had never been this bad before. I had convinced myself that eventually the novelty of Ben Baldwin would wear off. Following the once college quarterback now movie star would become boring and mundane as soon as the next big star was discovered. But five years later, it still hadn’t happened.

I glanced over my shoulder, a regular habit whenever I was in public. The couple in the next car was trying to soothe a fussy baby. They hadn’t reached for their phones, yet.

In the beginning, it was fun, even exciting when I made the cover of a magazine. It was the same kind of rush when I threw a winning touchdown. I didn’t want to admit to anyone now that at the time I got a kick out of being named the World’s Sexiest Bachelor. All of that seemed stupid, ridiculous, and shallow. I kicked the side of the railing with my boot.

The captain pulled the horn on the ferry as it approached the dock. The sound echoed over the water. I retraced my steps to the Jeep, and waited for the crew to motion me onto the shore. Maybe I had read too many scripts or played too many roles, but as the ramp lowered and I pressed his foot on the gas, I had the strange sensation that a new movie had begun.

***

There were six miles between the ferry dock and the main village of Brees Island. I couldn’t see anything except sand dunes as I followed the cars in front of me.

It was one in the morning, and I had managed almost sixteen hours without talking to my agent, publicist, stylist, trainer, or assistant. That was a record. The music on the radio had turned to static. I searched for a station. My eyes burned, but the cool air from the open window felt soothing as I drove.

I slowed the Jeep as I rolled into the village. Nothing was open, or at least from the street, I couldn’t see any lights. The car in front of me turned into the gravel parking lot of the Carribe Inn. I pulled to the side and watched as the driver walked to the door, grabbed an envelope from a drop box, and retrieved a pair of keys. That was how that guy had a room. Damn it. I hadn’t thought to call ahead to make reservations. I snorted. I hadn’t thought ahead about any of this.

Somewhere in the middle of the drive from the ferry dock, I remembered passing a campground. I pulled hard on the steering wheel until I made a U-turn, sending me back on the beach road.

Along the ocean side of the island was a campground. The office was dark. I pulled to an open spot and cut the engine on the Jeep. My lungs filled with a deep inhale of salty air as the waves pounded on the shore in front of me.

I reached for the lever on the seat and reclined it as far as it would go. There was barely enough room, but I propped my feet on the dash before pulling my hat over my eyes.

It wasn’t a penthouse, a yacht, or a billionaire’s guesthouse, but I smiled as my tired eyes gave in to the sleep that invaded his body. It might only last one night, but I slept satisfied knowing there was no way anyone in the world would find this movie star tonight.

CHAPTER TWO

Chelsea

The alarm chirped cricket sounds for the fourth time. I threw the sheet off my chest and kicked the quilt to the end of the bed. 5 a.m. Who in their right mind woke up at 5 a.m.? I tapped the screen on my phone to quiet the alarm. This wasn’t the first time I had cursed my alarm as I stumbled to the shower and turned the water on.

There were water restrictions this time of year on the island. So many tourists, so little rain, and only seven minutes a shower. It was my mother’s idea to use a kitchen timer. I twisted the dial to the right and placed the timer on the counter before stepping into the steady stream of hot water. If I had to take a quick shower, it was going to be a good one.

I closed my eyes and lathered a handful of shampoo through long strands of auburn hair.

He shouldn’t be stealing my heart and my breath

We said good-bye with one very last kiss

But no matter what, every corner I turn

I see his face, his eyes, and it burns, it burns

I raced to stop the water and hopped over the side of the tub. There had to be paper in here somewhere. I tore through the first cabinet drawer and then the other.

“Ugh,” I exhaled, and then wrapped a towel around my chest before scurrying into my room.

My writing notebook was still in my bag, and that was in the front seat of my car. I repeated the words in my head faster this time, hoping they didn’t slip away as quickly as they had appeared.

“Ah-ha!” I triumphantly pulled an envelope from a stack of unopened mail.

Pens were easier to find. I grabbed a ballpoint next to the bed and frantically jotted down the lyrics on the back of the envelope. I read them again aloud and hummed a few bars in a minor key. I smiled.

A shampoo trail slid along my temple. “Shit.”

I touched the foamy mess still in my hair and hesitantly left the envelope on the bed, walking back to the shower with one eye on the envelope. Maybe if I stared hard enough, the rest of the song would come.

Not knowing how much time I had actually spent in the shower before my burst of lyrical genius, I reset the timer for five minutes and rinsed my hair.

The lyrics came at the strangest moments. Sometimes it happened when there was a guitar on my knee and my writing journal within arm’s reach, but usually it was completely inconvenient and random like this morning—the words hit me like an unexpected burst of energy, needing to be expended in that moment or I would spontaneously combust—at least it always felt that way.

I twisted my hair between my palms and squeezed out the water. I didn’t want to go to work before the whole song had hit me in the face like a blast of cold air from the freezer. The thought of standing in the store all day made me grit my teeth.

I needed to finish it. I had to. If I called in sick, my mother would stop by, setting off a chain reaction from my aunts that would last all day. If I tried to take the day off, my father would never cease with the lectures on responsibility and setting a good example for the other employees.

Good example, I huffed. His every move was a bad example. It annoyed me to the core how self-righteous he was when I knew how he spent his nights and sometimes his afternoons. Just being in the same room with him made me sick.

He gave me one more reason to leave Brees Island. I wasn’t finished chasing my dream, and the longer I stayed, the more I had to put it on hold. Just like the lyrics on the back of that envelope.

I grabbed a towel and dried myself before stepping into a pair of khaki shorts and a fitted T-shirt with the logo for the island store where I worked.

It was dark as I walked to the side of the cottage. It was an oversized beach house that had been divided into four apartments. I had one of the lower corner units. There was a view of the cove from the deck. Luckily, the last renter had left a hammock, and it was my favorite spot to write.

It had been a battle with my parents to have my own place for the summer. They couldn’t understand why I didn’t want to live at home. Did every grad student have to deal with this, even at twenty-five? I had the master’s degree, I just needed a little bit of time to figure out what was next. It would have been completely unbearable living under the same roof as my dad. There was no backing down on my part. I fought until they both gave in.

I pulled a turquoise beach cruiser from the bike stand. The island was small. Everything was within riding distance. I rode to most places, enjoying the snippets of freedom the bike gave me. I threw my leg over the bike and pushed down on the pedal.

***

The door slammed behind me as I walked into the store.

“Good morning, sunshine.” Derek beamed as I reached behind him for an apron.

He moved closer so that my arm grazed the firm muscles in his shoulder. When he was this close I could see deep flecks of amber in his dark eyes.

“Hey.”

I stepped back, slipped the straps over my neck, and tied the strings tightly around my waist. Nothing was more unflattering than these canvas aprons my father made everyone who worked at Davis’s General Store wear.

“I’ve had better greetings,” Derek teased.

He had stopped sweeping. He leaned against the broom handle with one arm while his free hand roamed my hip, resting on the curve of my waist. His palm felt warm through my thin T-shirt.

I rolled my eyes. “I’m not a morning person. You know this.” I tugged at his wrist, working myself free.

“I wouldn’t forget something like that.” He smiled. I noticed he was overdue for a haircut. Most surfers let their hair grow long in the summer. Derek wasn’t any different.

“Just stop with the chipper-chipperness,” I warned.

My cheeks flushed pink with the memory of waking up under Derek’s tanned arms. That had been two days ago. I glanced over his shoulder and read the clock above the register. 5:45. Even with rushing around, I was still fifteen minutes late. God, I had to get out of here.

Derek gripped the handle and turned his attention to the strokes of the broom across the store’s hardwood floors. “Got it.”

I hadn’t meant to snap at him. He was just being Derek, and I was doing what I always did—lashing out at him when he was only being nice. But, it was too familiar, too intimate. True, things had taken an awkward turn since we had made out after Paul McIntire’s bonfire party. But somehow I had convinced myself we could do those things to each other in the dark under the influence of too many red cups, and it would magically disappear when we worked together at the store. It didn’t go as planned. It never did.

“Der, I’m—” Before I could complete the apology, my father barged through the back hallway. I bristled when he appeared.

“Chelsea? You late again?” He avoided my eyes and looked at Derek for an answer.

Unbelievable. This happened almost every morning and every morning Derek covered for me, but this time I didn’t deserve for my ass to be saved.

“Chelsea was here, sir. Right on time.” Derek circled around, concentrating on the dust pile and not my eyes.

“Good. Derek, would you mind giving me a hand? There’s a delivery out back on the docks. Bait shrimp’s in.”

“Sure thing, Mr. Davis.” Derek winked as he handed his broom to me. “Maybe you could finish this for me.”

“Uh. Sure.” I took the handle and watched as the two men disappeared into the hallway’s delivery entrance.

Derek would give me a hard time about the whole thing. He always did. If he thought covering for me would lead to more alone time, he had the wrong idea about what had happened between us.

Things had gradually escalated in the past month since I came home after graduation. It started with an accidental kiss in the shadows of the employee parking lot after work, and then one night the kiss moved to the backseat of the car when I thought we had technically rounded second base. It was as if Derek had transformed into the hot new guy while I was gone for two years. Everything about his body was new to me.

I secretly admitted I liked getting to know this side of him, but there was one thing about him that hadn’t changed. He wasn’t interested in stepping one toe off the island, and I didn’t want to keep one toe on it. No amount of flirting or hot kisses could change that.

CHAPTER THREE

Ben

“Hey, hey, you in there?” I heard a raspy voice through the fog of sleep. “Do you hear me?”

I shifted my feet from the dash of the Jeep and rubbed the back of my neck. There was a crick running from the base of my skull to my fingertips. My entire right arm was numb. I couldn’t remember the last time I had slept in a car. Maybe this would be the last—it should be.

“Mornin’, sir. What’s the problem?” Damn it. I had meant to cover up the accent. Maybe it wasn’t too late. I reached for my sunglasses.

“The problem is that you spent the night in my campground without registering or paying.” A man wearing a plaid shirt and a white mustache hovered outside the window. There was a pack of cigarettes peeking from his shirt pocket.

I adjusted my hat. “Oh, sorry about that. I can set— I mean, I will take care of the bill right now.” The words didn’t sound one bit Texan. I smiled and reached for the door handle. Where was my voice coach when I needed to boast?

The man stepped back to allow the Jeep door to swing open. “I don’t usually wake up to find people sleeping in their cars. Little unusual around here.”

I flipped through the bills in my wallet. “Again, I’m sorry. It was late and all the hotels on the island were closed. This place seemed like a saving grace at the last minute. So thank you.”

The man walked around to the back of the Jeep and eyed the license plate. “Georgia, huh?”

I froze. The cover story hadn’t come to me yet. Was I supposed to be traveling for the summer on my own? Was a friend on the way to meet me? The only thing I knew was that I wasn’t ready to be Ben Baldwin yet.

“No, sir. It’s a rental.” I handed the man a one-hundred dollar bill.

He cocked his head to the side. “Son, it’s ten dollars a night to park and camp.”

“Oh.” I looked toward the trail covered in scrubby water oaks that led back to the main island road.

There were plenty of inns and motels on the island. Probably had great little breakfast specials and ladies who told island legends and handed out seashells, but those same places had people. People who might recognize me and sell me out to the highest bidder.

“You know, I was hoping I could stay a few nights. I’m in no hurry,” I explained as the plan formed.

“Did you bring a tent? Anything?” The man eyed the Jeep’s backseat.

I laughed. “No, I didn’t think of that.”

“Hmm. Well, we do have some campers for rent. They’re the old-style aluminum pull-behinds, but I have them set up real nice and they’ve even been featured in a few camper magazines, if you’re interested. They call them retro-chic or some kind of nonsense.” The man shook his head and tossed his hands in the air.

Magazines were the last thing I was interested in, but I liked the sound of a camper. The feeling had returned to my hand, but another night in the Jeep wasn’t going to work. A throbbing shoulder here and an achy knee there reminded me I had taken too many hits on the football field.

“Sold. I’ll take one.” I nodded.

The man squinted, this time tilting his head to the other side. “Does anyone ever tell you, you look familiar?”

I kicked my boot along the sandy parking space, careful not to look up. “I must have one of those faces or a twin.” I chuckled, hoping the man would stop trying to place my famous face.

“Yep, one of those faces. All right. Come on. Let me show you the Silver Sand Dollar.” He walked away in the direction of the beach.

“Silver Sand Dollar?”

“My wife named all the spaces and the campers. She did all the decorating too. So, if it’s too much on the feminine side, you can blame her.”

“I’m sure it will be fine.” I followed him along the narrow path to a horseshoe shaped assortment of Airstream campers. There were five total. I hoped the Sand Dollar was the one at the end, farthest from the others and the rest of the campground. It undoubtedly had the best view of the beach too.

The man limped past the first camper named “Shark’s Den.” I read the name of each trailer until we arrived at the final one in the group.

Hot damn. I took in the twenty-two-foot silver structure. I couldn’t think of anything more fucking perfect.

“Here she is.” The owner pulled on the handle. “Now, just crank down on this twice and the door opens right up.” He ascended two steps into the camper.

I glanced around at the red-checked décor. At least it wasn’t pink or peach. Peach would have been far worse. Instead, this kind of looked like a picnic table.

There was a bed at the far end, separated by a bi-fold door. In the center was a bathroom with a standup shower, sink, and toilet; the kitchenette took up the majority of the center space; and the end closest to the path was filled with a U-shaped bench and round table. The panel of windows looked out on the waves rolling along the shore.

“What ya think?” The man had moved closer to the door. It seemed he was in a hurry to end the tour.

“I think it will work.”

“Good. You mind stopping by the office after you settle in and fill out your reservation card?”

My chest tightened.

“Reservation paperwork?” I knew as soon as I wrote my name down, this venture into anonymity was over. I’d be found out in two seconds.

“Nothing major. Length of stay, email address so we can send you our updates. That’s my wife’s idea. She started a monthly newsletter. People seem to like it.”

I relaxed. “Certainly. I can do that, and I’ll go ahead and pay up for the month.” Maybe if I paid enough up-front cash, they would leave me alone. My host seemed nice enough, but he had already spent more time studying me than I was comfortable with.

“The whole month? All right. Well, Flora will help you.”

“Flora?”

“That’s the wife. You can call her Flo for shorth.” He laughed. “I’m Carl, by the way. See you around.” He tapped on the doorframe before exiting.

***

I tucked the corner of the towel along my hipbone. The Silver Sand Dollar had everything I needed and nothing I didn’t. It was pure heaven. It didn’t matter that I barely fit into the standup shower or that after seven minutes the water ran like a drippy faucet. I had run until I had finally found something I didn’t think existed anymore. Freedom.

I ran a hand through my wet hair and slid into the booth overlooking the ocean.

The campground visitors had already started setting up on the beach. A few umbrellas dotted the horizon along with a few surf fishermen, and a pack of surfers headed to the shore to catch a wave.

My head jerked and I hit my elbow when I heard my phone ring. I looked at the name flashing across the screen. Rebecca. I exhaled. I wasn’t ready to talk to her. There wasn’t anything to talk about. Even if the stories weren’t true, even if the press had somehow twisted everything around against her, I couldn’t convince myself anymore that the pictures weren’t real. She was in Hawaii with someone else. Someone else held her hand, laughed next to her on a paddleboard, and fed her tropical fruit. There were too many pictures and too many of Rebecca’s smiles for me to pretend anymore. There was some kind of truth in that trash.

I exhaled when the ringing stopped. I reached for the phone, ready to delete her number, just as the ringing started again. Dammit. This time it was Rick. I had to answer it.

“Hey, buddy. What’s happening?” I dug deep into the Texas drawl.

“Buddy? What the fuck, Ben? Where in the hell are you? I have been looking all over the damn city of Atlanta for you. Where did you go after your charity event?”

“Rick. Rick. Rick. I’m fine.” I stood in front of the window and stretched. The lukewarm shower had barely touched the tightness in my neck.

“There’s nothing fine about you being missing.”

“I’m not missing. I’m on the phone with you. Man, it’s ok.” I opened a few of the kitchen cabinets, hoping Flo had stocked it with some snacks. A cold beer sounded spot on right now. There might not be another way to get through this phone call.

“How am I supposed to know we didn’t have another Rebecca Campbell situation?” Rick stopped mid-sentence. “That’s not what I meant. Hell, I meant—that something happened to you or—”

I shook my head. “I know what you meant. You don’t have to explain. I haven’t been kidnapped. I’m perfectly safe.”

“Fuck, man. You must be taking this hard. I can call her agent and find out what the deal is with the guy in Hawaii. It’s just the press. She wouldn’t run out on you like that.” Rick’s tone had softened. “Just tell me where you are. I can help.”

I paused my search for beer. There was no way I was telling anyone where I was, not even my agent, who usually had my every waking move scheduled on his calendar.

“Rick, you know I really appreciate that, man, but you need to let Rebecca and me take care of whatever is going on. Ok? I can handle it.” I slammed the last cupboard, not finding a single saltine cracker. My stomach grumbled. I hadn’t eaten anything since the bag of peaches last night. I smiled, remembering there was still another bag in my Jeep.

“Got it. I get it. You need your time. Understandable.” Rick sighed into the phone. “Here’s what we’ll do. You take a few days. I’ll handle the appearances on your schedule and tell them you have the flu or something. I’ll let everyone know you need a few days to get your strength back—yada, yada. I’ll take care of it. Just tell me what day you’ll be back.”

A group of boys emerged from the dunes in the distance. They had on pirate hats, and two reached for invisible swords. I watched, fascinated as the scene unfolded in front of me. Clearly, someone was going down for stealing the treasure.

“Ben? Day. What day are you coming back?” Rick had lost his sympathetic patience.

His sharp tone shook me from the pirate scene. I pulled the phone from my ear and looked at the screen. Ten minutes. I had already been on this call for ten minutes when I could be doing something much more enjoyable. Like playing pirate.

“I might not, Rick.”

“What the fuck? Are you fucking with me right now?” the agent fumed. “She’s just a girl, man. She’s not worth all of this.”

I sighed. I would never be able to explain any of this to Rick. Not everything revolved around Rebecca; it never did. And she had figured that out.

“You’re just going to have to take care of this for me for a while. I’m taking some time off. Which also means, don’t shop around for any new films for me. I’m on permanent hiatus.” I didn’t know the words would feel so good. “I’ll be in touch, Rick, and thanks for taking care of everything for me.” I pressed end and tossed the phone on the table before I caught another earful. I didn’t need it.

I had been a spy, a World War II hero, an ambitious politician, a fighter pilot, the romantic catch, but now nothing sounded better than playing pirate. I was going to take my life back, no matter the cost. And that was going to start with a cold beer and some food.

CHAPTER FOUR

Chelsea

Derek leaned over my back and whispered in my ear, “Did you hear Paul’s having another bonfire tonight?”

I straightened my posture and cleared my throat. Mrs. Sawyer was standing at the register, paying for sunscreen and a stack of gossip magazines. I nudged Derek away with my elbow. I hoped Mrs. Sawyer didn’t see the way I had turned a deep crimson.

“Here you go, Mrs. Sawyer.” I slid the magazines into a paper bag and handed over her change.

“Thank you. Today’s my first beach day all week, and I can’t wait to get caught up with my celebs.” She patted the bag.

I smiled, unable to relate to her fascination with gossip. But Mrs. Sawyer lived across the street from my parents and I couldn’t be rude to one of their neighbors. Although, on Brees Island, everyone was technically a neighbor.

“Bye, Derek.” The woman winked before leaving through the storefront glass door.

I twirled on my heels and shot him a stern look. “What was that all about?” My neck still tingled from his breath. It annoyed me that it felt kind of good.

“What? You think I should ask Mrs. Sawyer to go with me instead? I think she’d say yes.”

I lowered my voice and looked down the aisle, making sure there weren’t any other customers in the store. “You know what happened between us was a one-time deal, right?”

“One time? I don’t think so. That’s what you said the last three times.” Derek shoved a piece of gum in his mouth and arched a shot with the wrapper. “Score.” The paper landed in the center of the trash can.

“I’m serious, Der.” I could tell he wasn’t taking any of it seriously—not my attempts to deflect his advances or dissuade him from asking me out.

The flirting had been relentless since high school. He had cooled things off when I left for college, but now that I was home indefinitely, he was in hot pursuit. It didn’t help that I had stayed over at his place. I blamed the dullness of the island—that and his body. Derek definitely didn’t look like that when we were in high school. He was athletically built, tan, and eager to show me his new wave tattoo. Although, ever since we had crossed the friendship line, I feared that we would never be able to get back what we had on the other side. We weren’t even sleeping together, but maybe I was wrong thinking guys were better equipped to handle casual hookups.

And what exactly was I doing? Hooking up but not having sex? It was stupid.

“I will pick you up at eight.” He pointed at me as he backed out of the space behind the register.

“Der, you’re not listening.” I jammed my hands on my hips and gave him my most severe glare. It wasn’t working. He winked in response.

Then the words smacked me. They came out of nowhere.

“No, you’re the one not listening. See you then. I’ve got to get all the kayaks checked in. It’s that time.”

I didn’t hear the last part. I had already ripped a handful of register paper from the feed and grabbed a pen from the mason jar on the counter.

Why can’t you give me what I want?

It can’t all be in my head

It’s so easy to feel since we’ve met

Could it be that you’ve always known

And you’re ok leaving me alone

I tapped the pen against my cheek. Gah! I couldn’t get the next verse out. As suddenly as the words popped into my head, the rest had slipped away. Time was the only answer. Time with my guitar, my hammock, and no more distractions.

“Miss, do you have any crab nets?” An older gentleman whose shorts were embroidered with marlins stood in front of the counter.

“Huh?” I shook my head. “Oh, crab nets. Yes, yes, we have plenty of crab nets.” I walked from behind the counter, leaving the lyrics next to the register.

I guided the man to the side of the store lined with fishing tackle. “Do you need child size or adult size?” I asked.

“There are different sizes for different size crabs?” He scratched his head.

I repressed a sigh. Tourists. “No, I meant is the net for a child or an adult? We have some with extenders that makes it easier for the kids to scoop up crabs if they’re crabbing from the piers.”

He chuckled at his mistake. “Oh, I see. Well, we need both. We’ve got the whole family here for two weeks. My grandkids, my son, and his wife. It’s going to be a big time.”

The register paper fluttered when the air conditioning kicked on. Panic gripped me as I saw it slip to the floor. I should have stuffed it in my apron pocket.

I forced a smile. “That sounds nice. Where are you from?”

This was part of the job—making small talk with tourists. My parents had been in business for twenty-five years, but my grandparents had run the store before them. It was a family business based on southern hospitality, and I needed to keep my manners even though my lyrics were lying somewhere on the floor.

“Pennsylvania. Our friends from church vacationed here last summer, and they couldn’t stop talking about it. Thought we’d give it a try. This is our first time on the island.”

I resisted the urge to tell him how obvious that was. “Well, I hope you and your family have a great time.” I reached for the crab nets. “Is there anything else I can get you?”

“How about some of these fishing gadgets?” He pointed at one of the pink lures. “The boys might want to try it. They’d have fun trying to catch something.”

“You need some tackle? Did you bring any rods with you?”

The man studied the fluorescent fishing gear. “No, I guess I need some of that too.”

This time I wasn’t able to hold back the sigh that escaped my lips. I closed my eyes. Time to refocus. “Ok, well let me put these nets behind the register for you, and you can tell me all about your fishing needs and we’ll get started on that next.”

I trudged to the register and placed the nets against the wall. My father was never around when it was convenient, like when there was actually a customer who needed help. I knew exactly where he was. Anger singed along my temples.

The Pennsylvania man was focused on the filament lines and silver weights. I had at least a second to find the paper with the freshly minted lyrics. I dropped to the floor and reached under the bottom of the shelf to rake my fingertips along the floorboards. I hit something soft and gooey. Ick. Derek needed to do a better job with the floors. It had probably been a year since he had gotten under here.

“Miss, do you think my grandson should have this graphite rod or something a little heavier?”

Still on my hands and knees, I shouted over the counter, “On my way.”

As usual, the lyrics would have to wait.

CHAPTER FIVE

Ben

I pulled the handle on the campground office door. Bells jingled as it closed behind me. On the other side of a laminate desk sat a woman with short gray hair. This is not how I had pictured someone named Flora. She was missing bangle bracelets, fluffy curls, and sweet perfume.

“Good morning.” I grinned.

“Ahh, good morning. You must be—” Her lips twisted around as if she was trying to recall my name.

I extended my hand. “Jake. I’m Jake.”

I had settled on a cover story while I got dressed. I was going to be Jake, the writer. It was a little Hemingway-esque, but I knew it was the kind of character I could easily play for as long as I was on the island.

“Nice to meet you, Jake. I’m Flora. My husband said he put you up in Silver Sand Dollar.”

“Yes, ma’am. She’s great.” I winced, knowing my Texan enunciation of ma’am had slipped out. I was rusty with the accent work.

“I’m kinda partial to the Sand Dollar, but Pearl of the Oyster is a close second in my heart. I really wanted to go with a picnic theme. Picnic at the beach.” Her hands stretched across the air in front of her. “Carl told me to have at it. He’s not much for decorating.” She giggled.

“Yep. I got the picnic part with the red checks. Very nice.”

Flora pulled a folder from the desk drawer and licked her thumb as she flipped through a few pages. “Ok, if you could fill out your name, email address, and length of stay right here.” She pointed at the open lines and twirled the folder around for me. “How many nights? We charge in advance.”

I reached for the pen she had offered. Earlier this morning I had told Carl I would stay all month, but it didn’t feel right. “I’d like to take the Sand Dollar for the entire summer.”

Flora jumped in her seat. “All summer? My, that’s a surprise.”

I kept my focus on the three lines I had to fill in.

“Did Carl tell you the nightly rate for the campers?” She had retrieved a calculator from the same desk drawer, and she began counting the rest of the summer days on the calendar out loud.

“No, but I have cash. It’s not a problem.” I shoved my hands in my pockets and rocked back on my heels. I would need to go into town and buy something other than boots.

The campground hostess whistled. I got the impression she wasn’t used to long-term camper residents. She scribbled a few numbers, and then punched them into the calculator.

“All right. If you stay until the end of August, that’s ninety-two days at sixty-five dollars a night.” She paused to see if I was going to interrupt her. “With tax and water fees, that comes to sixty-five hundred dollars.”

I handed her the pen. “Ok. I need to run back to the Sand Dollar, but I’ll bring the cash in a few minutes.”

Flora looked at me suspiciously. That was the last look I wanted to see.

“Promise. I’ll be right back.” I smiled my best movie star grin and darted out of the office door.

I jogged the trail to the camper, tugged twice on the handle, and reached for my duffle bug. Everything I had was in that bag, along with several wads of cash. I formed two stacks with the bills until I had all sixty-five hundred dollars ready to hand to Flora. I shoved the money in my front pockets and slammed the door behind me.

The salt air hit me the same time my phone started ringing. I clenched my jaw and fist as I pulled it from my back pocket. Rebecca. I pressed decline and tucked the phone in my jeans.

Rebecca wasn’t going to give up until she talked to me. One of the things I had liked about her from the beginning was her persistence, but right now, it was the one thing that was pissing me off. Funny how cute, endearing things could suddenly turn into the ones that were the most aggravating. I smacked a mosquito against my neck as I trudged back to the campground office.

***

I pulled into an open space in front of Davis General Store. Flora had told me I could find everything I needed from beer to flashlights at the island’s largest store.

I didn’t recognize the song playing on the local station, but I liked the words. Something about summertime, sand, and dancing. It wasn’t anything like Texas music, but the lyrics were catchy. I adjusted the volume on the radio. I wanted to play it loud since I had the top of the Jeep rolled down, but part of staying incognito was not drawing unnecessary attention.

My boots hit the gravel parking lot, and I took the steps into the store two at a time. On the other side of this door was a twelve-pack with my name on it. Who cared if it was only ten in the morning? It was time to get this indefinite vacation started.

“Welcome to Davis,” a guy wearing an apron called across the store. He was stocking the freezer with beer.

I walked in his direction. “Thank you. That’s just what I was looking for.”

“Sure, man.” He handed me a case of beer. “Chelsea should be back at the register now. She can ring you up—unless there’s something else you’re shopping for today.”

Something about the store reminded me of my hometown in Texas. I couldn’t quite put my finger on what seemed so familiar. I was about as far away from Shiner, Texas, as I could get.

“Actually, I have some more shopping to do.” I knew my list was longer than just a case of beer.

“How about I take that for you, and you can have a look around?” The clerk gripped the sides of the cardboard carton and headed toward the front of the story. “Holler if you need anything.” I couldn’t help but notice how friendly the guy was.

“Thanks.” I began browsing the outer perimeter of the store. There wasn’t much in the duffle bag I had left in the camper. A few T-shirts, another pair of jeans, my running shoes, and enough boxer briefs to make it through the week. I didn’t need much.

I eyed the wall of board shorts. Now that I was living at the beach for the summer, I would need a pair. Unless there was a red carpet event and Lana Pine insisted I participate in the black tie selection, I had no interest in clothes. T-shirts and jeans fit every occasion. It felt strange to stand in front of the wall display of bathing suits. I reached for pair. They were simple. I needed simple.

Behind the swimwear was a rack of suntan lotion—something else I hadn’t thought to throw in my bag.

On the other side of the dressing room was a stand stacked with flip-flops. Exactly what I needed to fit in on the island. Beachgoers didn’t wear boots, especially not fifteen-hundred-dollar designer boots. I snatched a pair.

I strolled back to the other side of the store where the grocery aisles were. Yesterday I had avoided junk food. Tom, my personal trainer for the past two years, would punch me if he saw me eyeing the row of cookies and chips. The hell with Tom. He wasn’t here to force raw eggs and protein shakes down my throat. I tossed two bags of corn chips under my arm.

Trying to balance everything, I dumped it all on the counter. I looked up in time to hear an auburn-haired girl with the prettiest frown I had ever seen, curse under her breath. One of the bottles of lotion rolled off the pile and bumped against her hand, jarring the pen she was using.

I thought I heard her groan. She scooped up the note and tucked it into the front pocket of her apron.

“Is this all?” She sounded annoyed.

“Sorry about that.”

I wrapped my arms around the stash and tried to bring it back together in the center of the counter. As soon as I let go, a bottle of hot sauce toppled to the side and headed for the floor. I reached out and snagged the glass container before shattered on the wood.

“Wow. That was quick.” The girl had perched on her tiptoes to witness the great save.

I placed the jar upright next to the register. “Catlike reflexes.”

“Hmm.”

She started scanning tags before placing the items in paper bags.

I couldn’t help but notice she wasn’t impressed. I rubbed my jaw. It must be the stubble. I hadn’t shaved in several days. All part of the new incognito persona, but still girls usually flirted with me. I would be hard pressed to recount a time when a girl had batted her eyelashes, or asked me out and didn’t know exactly who I was.

“So what was that you were working on?” I asked, leaning against the counter.

For the first time, she paused and looked at me. “Was there anything else I can get you, sir?”

Puzzled, I fished in my jeans pocket for my wallet. “No. Thank you.”

She pointed at the screen. “That will be two hundred and thirty dollars and twenty-four cents.”

She tossed her hair behind her shoulder. I liked the color. It was pretty. She was pretty, in a natural way. It was nice to look at someone who hadn’t spent a gazillion dollars to have their face reorganized.

I counted out the bills and handed them to her before gathering the bags in my arms.

“Thank you for stopping by Davis.” She said it as if she was on autopilot.

“Thank you.” I smiled and walked out on the porch.

I loaded my purchases in the back of the Jeep. Damn it. The beer. I jogged back up the stairs and into the store.

The girl had her back turned and was focused on the paper she had spread out on the counter.

“So, you are writing something.” I pretended to peek over her shoulder.

“Hey, that’s private.” She shoved the paper back into her apron pocket.

“Dar—” I bit my tongue. I couldn’t say darlin’ here or anywhere. Too Texan. “I left my beer. The guy in the back brought it up for me, and I forgot it.”

“Oh, Derek didn’t mention it.” She turned around, searching the space along the counter for the beer. “Here it is.”

“Really, I’m sorry if I pried.”

I watched as she scanned the box. I hadn’t noticed the tiny freckles on the bridge of her nose. They were cute.

“I should have minded my own business.” I handed her another stack of bills and lifted the beer to my shoulder.

A smile spread across her face, and I saw a glimmer of blue in her eyes. A shade of blue I had seen in the sky over the ocean.

She shrugged. “It’s ok. Have a good day.”

I walked toward the door and pivoted on my heel to ask her something, anything, but she had already pulled the paper from her pocket again and forgotten I was ever there.

I smiled. It had been awhile—a very long while—but this was what it felt like when nobody knew who you were.

CHAPTER SIX

Chelsea

I looked at the clock again. It was the one my grandfather had put in the store on opening day. Of course I wasn’t around in 1961 when the store first opened for business. But I had heard the family tale so many times I felt like I had been there. My grandmother had served pineapple upside down cake and champagne punch. It was the social event of the season. Knowing Brees Island, it was probably the only social event that year. The little hand was almost at the five—that was all I cared about.

“See you at eight. Don’t forget, hot stuff.” Derek tossed his apron in a ball across the counter.

“Wait, I didn’t say I was going tonight. I have things to do,” I argued.

Things that included finishing two incomplete songs that had surfaced at the most inopportune times today. Paul’s party would be like all of the rest—over the top and expensive. I didn’t mind missing it.

“Whatever. You and I both know there’s nothing else going on tonight. See ya.”

I rested my forehead against the smooth surface of the counter. This day would never end. If I could just make it through one more, then I would have a full day off. No matter what Derek had planned that day, I was going to write. He could party alone.

Bertie walked by and typed in her clerk number on the register. “You ready to clock out?” she asked.

“I can’t get out of here fast enough. I’m so glad you’re here.” I ducked out of the apron and handed it over to the petite woman.

“For someone who is going to inherit this gold mine, you don’t seem to like it too much.” Bertie flattened the apron against her chest.

“Don’t remind me,” I groaned.

I didn’t like to talk about the store as an inheritance. I had no brothers or sisters to share the burden. It was just me. If things went the way I wanted, I would be writing songs and hearing them on the radio. My life on Brees Island would be part of the past.

“All right, kiddo. Go on. Get out of here. You probably have something fun planned tonight. I’ve got the store.” She shooed me from behind the register.

“If you see my dad, tell him I closed out the drawer like he asked and the report is in his office, ok?”

“Sure thing. Don’t worry about reports. He’ll find it. Night.”

I walked past the coffee machine, and the leftover display of this morning’s donuts. In less than thirteen hours, I would be right back here, starting the day all over again.

I grabbed my purse and keys from the office and kicked open the screen door to the employee lot. Maybe I could squeeze in a few writing hours before Derek picked me up.

***

One of the advantages to working in a beach store was getting first dibs on all the cute clothes that came in. I appreciated that perk if nothing else. I tied the halter-top behind my neck and pulled the rest of the fabric around my sides. Derek was going to notice me no matter what I wore. No use in trying to hide it.

At eight sharp, I heard a knock on the door. I opened it to face the dark-haired guy who had chased after me since we were fourteen.

“Hey, you look hot. Ready?” Derek smiled, his eyes trailing the V between my breasts.

It was hard to ignore the look on his face. It stirred something under my skin—something I had felt a few nights ago. “Uh, yeah. Let me get my bag.”

I twirled away from the door and closed my eyes. Quick party and then home by ten. That might give me a couple of hours to write before bed.

Derek held the door open as I passed under his arm. “I’ve been looking forward to this all day.”

“Why? Paul’s parties are always the same. Booze, music, and a load of tourists he seems to pick up on the beach. Scratch that, girls he picks up on the beach.”

“If you have to ask, then I’ve been doing everything wrong.” He opened the passenger side door.

I recognized the gesture as something that happens on a date. This wasn’t supposed to be a date. Hesitantly, I slid into the car and waited as he closed the door and walked around to the driver’s side.

I glanced at the light in my bedroom window. How had I let him drag me into this? My guitar was in there with two songs, like half a heart, waiting for its whole.

***

Paul’s parties were always epic. His dad was the island’s most successful realtor, and when there was less than six square miles of real estate to sell, any tiny piece of it was valuable. Mr. McIntire had figured out Brees Island was like an untapped oil pipeline long before anyone else caught on.

Derek parked next to the fence, several cars away from the main gate. During party nights, Paul kept the gates open.

“You ready?” he squeezed my hand. I felt the warmth of his palm as it pressed against my knuckles. Moments like this I knew he was the sweetest guy on the island, but I also knew he would always be the sweetest guy here—he wouldn’t leave.

“Yep. One red cup and then you have to take me home.” I tilted my head to the side.

“Whatever you say, boss.” He snatched the keys from the ignition and stuffed them in his pocket.

I hopped from the car before he could make it to my side. I didn’t want him trying any more of that chivalrous stuff tonight. We were here as friends.

“I wish you wouldn’t call me that, you know. I’m not your boss. I work at Davis just like you.” I sidled up next to him as we walked through the iron gates of the McIntire beach estate.

“I’m just kidding around with you, girl. Lighten up. We’re here to have fun.” He slipped his arm around my shoulder. “Besides, I think it’s kind of hot that you’re my boss.”

I shoved into his side, just under his ribs. “Am not!”

Derek’s deep laugh echoed across the driveway. “All right, all right. But it’s definitely hot when you get mad.”

He was relentless. I rolled my eyes and followed him up the stairs that led to the massive ten-bedroom house.

Paul greeted us at the front door. His blond hair was spiked perfectly. I wondered how much time he had spent studying hair gel techniques for men.

“Dude. Glad you made it.” Paul slapped Derek on the back.

“Wouldn’t miss it, but you know this one I had to drag here kicking and screaming.” He pointed at me.

“That’s not true, Paul. I love your parties.” I reached up to hug him.

He didn’t seem fazed. We had all known each other since elementary school or longer. When you graduate with a senior class of thirty, you know people well. I didn’t think Paul cared one way or another if I made it to one of his summer parties. All he cared about was the minivan that had just pulled up with a load full of college girls.

“Excuse me. Girls are here.” He pushed past Derek and me to meet the blondes and brunettes in tight sundresses.

Derek laughed. “I guess I should go get us some drinks.”

I held up my finger. “One. One drink.”

“Ok, ok. Meet you on the deck.” He walked into the crowded living room as I made my way to the ocean side deck.

At least I didn’t recognize anyone else. It would be a lot easier to escape after my one drink max, if none of the other Brees High classmates made an appearance.

Our high school class was evenly split: fifteen went to college like me, and the other fifteen stayed on the island and drifted into family businesses or took community college classes like Derek. It wasn’t that those fifteen weren’t college material, but there was a strong pull to stay on the island. Parents needed help running restaurants and fishing boats, and it was too expensive for most families. I knew I was lucky my parents had a year-round business, with year-round income that could fund my education. I also knew my four years of college and two years of graduate school came with strings, more like heavy metal chains.

In the far corner of the deck, the music wasn’t quite so loud. I could hear the occasional wave crash on the shore. I leaned over the railing and looked at the pool below. Paul had turned on the iridescent lights. The water sparkled between a pink and purple hue. Tacky, I thought.

“Here you go.” Derek arrived with a full cup of something the bartender had whipped up.

“Thanks.” I took a timid sip. “Paul’s got the lights in the pool on a disco show or something.”

Derek peered over the side. “He’s such an asshole. Probably one of those girls in that pack will think there’s something cool about it.”

“If you don’t like him, why do you always come to these parties?”

Coconut. Tonight’s concoction was a smooth coconut mix almost like a pina colada. I sipped again.

“Because, I get to see you and hang out with you—not at work.” He caught a strand of my hair and tucked it behind my ear.

It felt familiar. It felt sweet. “Der, this isn’t going to happen.” I paused and looked into his dark brown eyes. “We—us—it’s not—”

He cupped the side of my face with his free hand, gazing intensely at my lips. It was hard to talk to him while he stared at me like that. Even harder with him so close and so warm.

“How’s your drink?” He moved so that there was just enough space to allow the cup to tip up and take a sip.

I watched his throat move with each swallow. I knew he was giving me time to soak in the physical connection we had. Logic told me to stop right there. We didn’t have anything in common; we never would. How could we when our goals were so different?

He reached around my waist and slid his hand under my shirt so that it rested against the small of my back. I darted my eyes to his.

“Der—”

“Shhh.” He placed his cup on the railing and pulled me against him.

His grip was strong, but I relaxed into him as his lips pressed against my mouth, hot and firm. Kissing him felt wrong, all kinds of I-shouldn’t-be-doing-this wrong, but maybe that was why I couldn’t stop doing it. I moaned as his tongue moved against mine.

He broke free to whisper in my ear, “Let me take you home. Now.”

My mind was screaming no, no, no. This was what happened the other night. This is what leads to confusion, hurt, and a ruined friendship.

“If you’re worried, I promise I won’t make a big deal about it.” He nipped the side of my neck. “Just tonight.” His fingers stroked the skin along my back. It felt good. The way Derek touched me always felt good.

My resistance wasn’t as strong as I wanted it to be. He had two free hands, and while one kept me pressed against him, the other slid along my stomach and made its way below my shorts. I tried to press back, to break free, but as soon as I leaned into the hand holding me in place, he plunged his fingers between my legs.

“Oh, Der. You can’t. We can’t—” I rocked my head back, giving him full access to my neck. He kissed the skin along my throat. His fingers teased the sweet spot until I was pressing deeper against him.

“Either you let me take you home, or I’ll make you come right here. And everyone will hear you.” He growled in my ear, sending more heat through my body.

God, I didn’t want him to stop. But I knew this was a big mistake. He dipped inside me again, filling me with more want than I was ready to handle. “Ok, ok,” I stammered breathlessly. “But it’s the last time.” Maybe this was what I needed. I could get it out of my system and stop having these moments with him. Moments that made me hot, wet, and beg for anything he would give me.

Abruptly, he shifted his fingers from between my legs, grabbed my hand, and led me around to the steps on the side of the deck. No reason to go back into the party crowd.

The red cup was still in my hand. I chugged the rest of the coconut drink and tossed it in the bushes. The McIntire’s gardener would find it in the morning.

Derek’s pace picked up as we neared the car. I knew he was worried I would change my mind. Somewhere in the back of my head, I kept waiting for my goodie-goodie self to emerge and tell him she was kidding and that the place he had touched between her legs had cooled off, but that girl never showed up. Not on the ride home. Not when I fumbled with the keys to my door. Not when he untied the knot on my halter. And not when I turned off the lights.

***

The alarm was sounding, but it wasn’t mine. I thought crickets were bad, but car horns in the morning were like nails on a chalkboard. Where was the sound coming from? And why was there an arm draped across my chest?

I sat straight up. Shit. It had happened again. Well, not completely again, but enough. I ran my fingers through my hair. Those horns had to stop.

“Der, Der, can you turn off your alarm?” I shoved against his heavy frame. He slept hard.

“Aw, sorry.” He reached for the floor, and eventually the sound stopped. He rolled back to the center of the bed, pulling the sheet over his head and covering the wave tattoo on his shoulder blade.

“Thanks.” I looked at my phone. It was 4:45. He got up even earlier than I did. That must be how he always made it to the store first.

I watched as he fell back into a pattern of deep breathing. Things had really gotten out of control last night. We almost had sex. As naked as we were, it seemed like we had, but no, it hadn’t actually happened. The crazy thing was I was just going to do it, but Derek said he wanted the first time to be special between us. Something about romance and candles. That was when I knew it had to be the last time. Every part of my body reacted to him except my heart, and that wasn’t fair. Last time, I swore.

I cared about him enough to stop leading him on. I was never going to love him like that.

I maneuvered to the edge of the bed, slipping one foot to the floor and then the other. If I could make it to the shower before he woke up again, I could avoid the awkward naked thing. He was completely wrapped in the sheet, and we had kicked the comforter to the floor last night. It was a run-for-it kind of situation.

I waited for his next exhale, and then counted: one, two, three. I dashed to the bathroom and closed the door behind me.

I picked up the timer. I turned the dial to seven minutes and reached for the shower handle. At least today I wouldn’t be late for work. That was a first.

CHAPTER SEVEN

Ben

The pounding in my head became more and more focused until it felt like someone was piercing my temples with a knife.

“Son of a bitch.” I winced and slapped the side of my arm. The mosquitoes around here were as big as horseflies.

The campfire I had started last night was a pile of ash. Last night. I rubbed the corners of my forehead. I hadn’t had that many beers in a long time. I kicked one of the remnants out of my way as I headed toward the Sand Dollar. One of Quinn Jansen’s new songs had played on the radio, and that was the last thing I remembered—cranking the music and getting lost in the words.

The bottle rolled. I wanted a shower first, and then I would be back out to clean up this mess. Carl and Flora had been clear about their tidy camp standards.

“Looks like you had a good time last night,” a sultry voice called from behind him.

I stopped and turned to look over my shoulder. I hadn’t noticed anyone else staying in the camper horseshoe, but I knew it was unlikely I would be the only resident all summer.

A woman with white blond hair stood a few yards from the front of my silver refuge. She smiled and smacked her gum.

The beer bottles littered what piece of land I could call my yard. Damn, I must have finished off the case.

“Good morning,” I offered the woman, keeping one hand on the door and hoping she would leave as quickly as she appeared.

“Good morning to you.” She bit hard on her bottom lip, and I saw her eyes rake me over like a piece of candy.

Why in the hell did I have to deal with this right now? I pulled the handle and stepped one bare foot into the camper. I had no interest in talking to a forty-something woman already in a bikini. It was barely daylight.

“See you around? I’m Alice. Staying in Pirate’s Booty right next door if you want to stop by some time.” She waved, only using the tips of her fingers.

“All right.” I closed the door behind me and dropped my head. I would end up next to the cougar on vacation trolling for her next young thing. I knew I was being rude, but some boundaries had to be established right away.

The only thing I had for dinner last night was a bag of corn chips and beer—an entire case of beer. Tom always said habits like that would catch up with me, but I didn’t care. The headache hurt like hell, but it was worth it. When was the last time I had listened to the music I wanted, drank what I wanted, ate what I wanted, and built as big of a fire as I wanted? The higher the flames, the colder the beer, the more I forgot.

I flipped open the mini-fridge. It reached the top of my waist, but had plenty of room for a summer bachelor. I smiled. There was one more cold beer with my name on it. I twisted off the top and chugged a few swallows.

The empty bottle landed in the trash can. I realized I had now spent my second night on the island in a less than comfortable sleeping position. The bed tucked at the rear of the trailer looked softer than a pile of feathers. I stripped my T-shirt and threw myself chest down on the red and white checked quilt. Sleep—I needed more sleep.

***

“Mama, I’m fine.” I tried to soothe my worried mother. “I needed a break from work, that’s all.”

“Darlin’, if you’re in some kind of trouble, then just come on home,” she suggested.

“I’m not in trouble. Everything is perfectly ok. It’s called a vacation.” The last time my mother sounded this worried was when I got caught skipping school. My parents had grounded me for a month after that.

“Ben, I don’t like to get involved with your Hollywood stuff.” I smiled. That’s how she always referred to my work. “But, I want to help you. Why don’t you come home and rest here? I can make all your favorites.”

“As tempting as that is, I don’t need mac and cheese right now as much as I need to clear my head.” I could picture her, hair pulled back in a clip sitting in front of the bay window with a cup of coffee in her hand and a frown on her face.

“It’s that girl, isn’t it? That’s what this is all about.” Her tone was sharp. “You know I don’t like to read those magazines, but her face was all over the stands at the checkout at the supermarket.”

I thought about how to answer that question. Of course Rebecca was part of this, but not in the way my mother thought. It wasn’t heartbreak. It was humiliation and disappointment. One more failed relationship to add to a growing list for the world to tally up for me, one neon headline at a time.

“Rebecca’s moved on. I’ve moved on. I don’t really want to go into it right now.” The pictures of Rebecca looking adoringly into some other guy’s eyes were still fresh. At least last night, with the help of some cold beer, I had forgotten about them.

“Ok, let’s talk about something else, then. Where are you? Is it nice?” Her east Texas accent accentuated the vowels in each of her words.

I gazed out the window as a pelican skimmed across the water. “Yep. It’s beautiful. You would like it.”

I wondered if the set of pirates would be back later today to attack the sand dunes. I knew my mom would get a kick out of them. She frequently referred to her future grandchildren, but always followed it up with “no pressure here.” At twenty-eight I was in no rush to start a family. Hell, I wasn’t in a rush to find another girlfriend. Becs had cured me of that for a long time.

“I bet I would. I’ve been trying to get your father to take me on a trip for months now, but he won’t leave. He says there’s no point in getting out of Texas. For once, I’d just like to take a vacation with him.”

I had invited my parents to my first awards show in Hollywood when my career began to skyrocket, but my mother wouldn’t travel without my father and my father wouldn’t leave Texas.

“Mama, why don’t you take a trip without him? Do something for yourself. I can arrange it for you.” I had offered on several occasions. I knew what her answer would be before the words were out of her mouth.

“You know I can’t do that.”

“I know, I know.” I shook my head. “All right, let me get goin’.”

Eventually, this call would circle back to Rebecca and my whereabouts. I had to cut her short. It was better for her sake if she didn’t know where I was, just in case Rick did call and try to pester it out of her.

“Love you, darlin’. Call me if you need to,” she added.

“You too. I’ll call later in the week.” I wanted to talk to her before Rick tried to reach her first.

“I’ll tell your father you said hello.” The words hung in the air.

I didn’t have anything to say to that.

“Ok, Mama, bye.”

I left my phone on the table. My father wouldn’t return the sentiment. We didn’t’ speak on the phone unless it was because he accidentally answered when I called.

Joe Baldwin hadn’t quite gotten over the fact that his son turned down an opportunity to play professional football for a chance to chase imaginary bad guys and gorgeous women in pictures. It wasn’t that I didn’t love football, but at best I would be a second string quarterback, more likely a tight end on a low budget team. It was the concussions that scared me more than anything. I had had three: one in high school and two in college. And I knew the ones coming from the pros would leave a much deeper impact.

At first, a local department store asked if I would model for them, next it was a national chain store, until somehow I wound up with an agent pitching me for small parts in action films.

I fell into acting as easily as I could read an oncoming blitz. I never knew I needed that creative outlet until I held the first script in my hands. There was something exhilarating about creating life in the words on a page.

I didn’t tell my father right away that I wasn’t entering the draft. I told my mother. We both knew she could soften the blow. The way she handled a crisis was impressive.

I wedged into the shower. I meant to ask Flo yesterday why the water turned off so quickly. I didn’t think the entire shower had lasted ten minutes. I made a mental note to stop by the office later today.

Sufficiently soaped and rinsed, I wrapped a towel around my waist. It was after one, and I wanted to head back into the village. As much as I enjoyed the junk food binge yesterday, I needed to make another store run and stock the Sand Dollar with some proper groceries.

I grabbed the keys to the Jeep and slid my sunglasses on. The blaring sun hit me right between the eyes. Ibuprofen would be first on today’s list. I cranked the Jeep and turned toward the village.

CHAPTER EIGHT

Chelsea

It didn’t bother me that on my one day off it was raining. I pulled my wrap a little tighter against my chest and repositioned a pillow behind my back. The ocean looked flat. The raindrops beat steadily against its waves, creating the illusion that it was calm. I knew it was anything but.

I could sit here all day rocking in the hammock with my guitar and notebook of songs. I was tucked against the side of the house, protected from the wind while the thunderstorm raged on around me.

The way you felt against my lips

The way you—

I changed the key and tried the notes again.

The way you held that kiss

It didn’t seem right. It didn’t feel right. My stomach turned. Just like kissing Derek, this song was wrong. I scratched through the words until they were illegible.

You want to clip my wings

Keep me in your cage

But that’s not who I am

And that’s not who I’ll be

My fingers fell into a rhythm on the guitar as the words tumbled from my lips.

I have my own dreams

No matter what you say

I’m still going to believe

I’m still going to walk away

I stopped to write down the last few lines. These words felt right. They were coming from a place in my heart I knew was true. I kicked along the deck so that the hammock began to swing again. I closed my eyes and strummed, humming the words in my head. I might have just written my own anthem.

***

The rain had finally stopped. I stretched my arms above my head and carefully stepped off the hammock. The only thing I regretted was that it was almost dark and that meant the day was over. Tomorrow would come early, and so would another full day of clock watching at the store.

I padded inside and closed the sliding glass door behind me. The air conditioner had been running all day, and it was chilly in the apartment compared to the humid air on the porch.

I used the pen to secure my hair in a twist. It felt good to get it off my neck. Once I was in writing mode, everything else fell away and out of place. I hadn’t bothered to take a shower all day or even dab on moisturizer. The plus side was that I had written two songs that were nearly perfect.

However, my stomach was growling and my brain would need fuel if I was going to keep up this writing marathon. In ten minutes, I had a pot of water boiling and a bowlful of spinach leaves washed.

I dumped in a handful of spaghetti noodles when I heard the chime on my phone. It was Derek.

I need to talk.

Shit. This was exactly what I didn’t want to do. Lucky for me, yesterday was his day off from work. He told me he was going to surf all day. Today, I was off from the store so we hadn’t talked since the morning after Paul’s party. Eventually, I would have to face him. It was stupid to think two days apart would put me back in the friend zone in his mind.

I tried to think of a casual response to keep things light.

What’s up?

I’ll be over in 5.

I grimaced.

Maybe another time. I’m not feeling great.

It was a complete lie, but I had spaghetti, salad, and an amazing song to craft. I watched my phone anxiously. After a minute, I slipped it into my pocket. Derek must have taken the hint. Relieved, I twisted the cork off a bottle of red wine and poured a glass of the crimson liquid. It tasted sweet on my tongue. It was amazing how it soothed all the stress from my body.

“Chelsea! Chelsea!” Derek’s voice carried through my door along with several heavy knocks.

I coughed on the last gulp of wine and rushed to the door. He wasn’t supposed to be here.

“Der, what’s going on?” I stepped back as he barreled past me.

He was carrying a straw bag in one hand. From the top, I saw pink petals peeping out.

“Are you ok? Are you really sick?” His brow furrowed as he did a quick assessment of my condition.

“I’m tired. Exhausted actually. I’m having a bite of dinner, and then I’m going to bed. Can we talk another time?” I followed him to the kitchen. Apparently, he thought I wasn’t seriously ill.

The straw bag was on the center of the table, and he began emptying the contents: vanilla pillar candles, pink roses, a speaker, chocolate, and a bottle of wine.

“What’s all this?” The nervous feeling had crept back to my stomach.

Derek shifted on his feet. “The other night. It was all wrong. All wrong.” His hair, damp from the rain, clung to his forehead.

“I know it was.” I sighed, wishing we were on the same page, but knowing that this display of romance said something completely different.

“And I want everything with you to be perfect. So I brought it—the perfect night.” He crossed the four steps between us and wrapped his arm around my waist.

The smell of his cologne and mint gum invaded my space.

“Der, I’m really sorry about the other night, but—” Before I could protest, his lips landed on mine and his hands worked their way under my shirt. Tomorrow, neither of us would feel great when I didn’t return his affection. Maybe in some other world I could use him this way, but we had known each other too long, and I would always be in this place with him—not moving forward. I couldn’t do this anymore. I had to keep that promise to myself.

“Derek.” I shoved against him until I was out of his arm’s reach. “No.” I hated the confused look on his face. “We both agreed. It was the last time.”

He approached me. “But there’s something here. There’s always been a thing between us.”

If I told him I agreed we had great physical chemistry, it would only lead him on. He hadn’t read all the signals wrong. But it was too fucking confusing to sort that out.

I shook my head. “Derek, we have been friends forever.”

“Don’t give me that damn friend speech. I don’t want to be friends. I want to be with you.” His eyes blazed. “And you’re being stubborn about it as usual.”

“It’s not going to happen.” I crossed my arms. “I tried to tell you.” I realized then that I hadn’t done a good job of explaining my position. Every time I said no to him, it was accompanied by kisses. Kisses that led to other, hotter things. Shit. I could see how the guy was tangled up in the mess I had created.

“Nothing? You can honestly stand there and tell me you feel nothing?” His fingers reached for my neck, but I stepped away. The last time really had happened.

“I guess that’s my answer, isn’t it?” he whispered.

I didn’t recognize the look in his eyes. I had known him since we were kids and thought I knew every expression on his face. It hurt to see him look at me as if I were a criminal. The kind of criminal who picks up a knife and plunges it deep into someone’s heart.

“I am sorry. You know I care about you, don’t you?” I tried to explain.

This was the worst possible ending. I had to make him understand. I was trying to keep from hurting him more. He had to see that.

“Don’t.” He shook his head. “I don’t need to hear it. This probably has nothing to do with me, and everything to do with that.” He pointed at the guitar resting in its stand. I had dropped it there on my way through the door.

It was as if he had attacked my child. Protective instincts rushed through me, and I stepped a little closer to the instrument. I always thought Derek liked my songs. It didn’t occur to me until now that maybe he only listened to them so he could spend more time with me.

“You know what music means to me.” The realization that he might not understand or even like my music seemed like sudden betrayal.

“Yeah, I do. It means more than me, or any one else on this island,” he accused.

“You aren’t being fair. You know I could leave any day. I’m sending out songs every week. One of the labels is going to call me. I am leaving, and then what? You’re going to pick up your surfboard and follow me to Nashville or Austin? There’s no ocean in either of those places.”

“I took geography,” he snarled, leaning against the door. “You know there’s more to me than surfing and working at the store. There are things I want to do too.”

I studied him. I could name his favorite foods, his favorite bands, his beer of choice, but I had no idea anything else interested him. He was bluffing.

“Ok, then tell me. What do you want to do? Do you really want to pack up your life and leave Brees Island?” I had never asked because I didn’t need to. Derek was an open book. One that I had read repeatedly.

His groan filled the room. “No, I don’t want to leave. Why would I? Our families are here. The beach is here. Everyone we know is here. I wish you would stop thinking that you could be happier somewhere else.”

I folded my arms. “That’s what you don’t get. I have been happier somewhere else. I went to college. I went to grad school. I loved Carolina. Every single day I was in Chapel Hill was better than being stuck here. But you wouldn’t know anything about that since you refused to live life off this piece of sand.” I gritted my teeth.

He peeled away from the door. “I can’t believe you.”

“Der, don’t go like this. We shouldn’t be arguing about this stuff. It’s always been this way.” I pulled on his arm. “I didn’t want you to get hurt. Believe me. I didn’t want this to happen. This is everything I tried to avoid.”

His eyes narrowed. “Crazy, because when you were begging me for it the other night, I thought you wanted me.”

I slapped him across the face harder than I meant to. It was the first time I had hit anyone. My palm stung.

His eyes dropped to the floor before he opened the door, walked out, and closed it behind him.

I went straight to the kitchen and inhaled the glass of wine. Maybe it could soothe me again. I opened the sliding door and tucked my feet under me as I sank into the hammock. I didn’t know when they started, but the tears were there, running down my face like the rain.

CHAPTER NINE

Ben

“Hey, there.” Alice waved as she placed her beach chair ten feet from mine. “This spot taken?” she asked, pointing to the open patch of sand.

She proceeded to bend forward from her waist. Today’s suit was a one-piece leopard number with big ovals cut from the sides.

I pretended to adjust my hat. I didn’t want an accidental peep show of anything that belonged to Alice. It was clearly her intention. In the past two weeks, she had worn every skimpy outfit imaginable, and I didn’t know how much more I could take.

“No, it’s free.” I limited my smile. It was one of my new habits on Brees Island.

If I smiled too much, someone might recognize my magazine-selling grin. I was certain a couple at the gas station had recognized me yesterday. They whispered nonstop while I filled the Jeep, but I kept my head down and my smiles short. Eventually, they had driven off in the direction of the ferry, and I knew I had stolen another day of freedom. So far, the paparazzi hadn’t descended upon me.

But that’s how the days were. Each one could be my last here.

“Good. I love this part of the beach.” She wiggled her bottom into the striped chair. “Want a chip?” She extended a bag in my direction.

“No, thanks. I’m good.”

“You probably don’t eat stuff like this. Not with a body like that.” She pulled her sunglasses to the bridge of her nose.

I hated when she looked at me like that. “Well, I try to eat healthy.” I reached into my cooler, pulled out a beer, and twisted the top off. Maybe a few of these would help drown out her chitter-chatter.

“I saw you running this morning. What kind of workouts do you do?” she asked. She stuffed the foil pack of chips into her beach bag. “Do you need a workout buddy? I love running.”

I swallowed hard on the beer. I wanted to tell her to give up. I wasn’t going anywhere near the Pirate’s Booty or her. She had invited me over for drinks and dinner almost every night. I was running out of excuses.

“No thanks, ma’am. I like to do things on my own.” I dug a hole in the sand with my feet. The surf rushed in and filled the hole as if my heel had never moved the sand.

“Well, that’s too bad. Let me know if you ever need help, you know, with the workout.” She giggled.

“Will do.” I pulled my hat farther over my eyes and reclined in the chair. I didn’t have to talk to her if I was asleep.

***

It could have been two or three hours since I had drifted off. Sleep came a lot easier now. I didn’t bother with clocks anymore. My cheeks prickled with the first signs of sunburn. I swatted at a fly.

“Fuck,” I mumbled as I caught myself from tipping over onto the sand.

I looked over my left shoulder. Alice was gone. I was grateful for that. I flipped the lid on the cooler and reached into the container that was now more water than ice. I twisted the top off an icy bottle and chugged until it was empty.

The water was flat today and calmer than I remembered seeing it in the past two weeks. Usually surfers dotted the break line, but with quiet waves, I noticed a few kayaks floating close by.

Since I had moved into the Sand Dollar, I had managed to get an even brown tan, drink as much as I had in college, and remain completely anonymous as Jake, the writer from Georgia. I chuckled, knowing that so little had never been accomplished in two weeks. It took real effort to do nothing, and of that, I was prouder than hell.

I rubbed the scruff that had grown on my face. I had never had this much facial hair before. There were always actors who had to grow beards for roles or dye their hair, but my bankability was in my face. It was never a request I had to fulfill. Maybe next film. As soon as the thought entered my mind, my chest tightened and it felt like shards of glass had slipped under my ribcage. I struggled to push them out. No, no more films. It’s not happening.

I fished in the cooler for another beer. A fiddler crab waved its large claw near my toe before scurrying sideways into an open hole in the sand.

There was something settling about the beach. The longer I watched each wave roll toward me, unfurling in a smooth flutter over the bank of broken shells, the longer I wanted to stay and do nothing more.

CHAPTER TEN

Chelsea

“Derek, I didn’t hear the answer. Was Chelsea late this morning?” My dad peered at Derek. He had a Styrofoam cup of coffee in his hand.

I tied the apron behind my waist and waited for the truth to be revealed. Of course I wasn’t on time. I was never on time. It was 5:45 in the fucking morning.

Derek gripped the broom handle tightly. His knuckles were white where they should have been flesh-colored.

“Dad, stop. Just stop.” I couldn’t stand the torture anymore.

He looked down the brim of his nose at me. “I was speaking to Derek.”

“Right, but he doesn’t need to answer for me. I was late, ok? I was not here at five thirty. Is that what you wanted to hear?”

Derek swept a path near the employee hallway.

“That fifteen minutes is coming out of your check or you’re staying late today.” Hayden Davis stood and observed the morning routine in his store, like he was a king. My dad was the farthest thing from a king.

“Whatever.” I huffed my way to the register. I watched him sip on the coffee. I wished it would burn his tongue.

“We can talk about this later, Chelsea. Derek doesn’t need to hear your tantrums.”

I clenched my fists as I popped open the register to count the till for the morning. He was condescending, insulting, patronizing, and my father. I would do anything to try to get through each encounter.

For the most part, I avoided him. If he walked in the front door, I walked out the back. If he needed help in the coolers, I raced to the kayak stand on the docks. If inventory in the storage room needed to be counted, I volunteered to run the register at the front. I calculated every way possible that I could be in the same store but not within earshot or sight of him.

Despite his failure to acknowledge I wasn’t ten years old anymore, there was a time when I loved being around my father. We used to close the store together, grab ice cream, and plot how we could get Mom to stop making that awful crab casserole. Or on slick days we would take the clam rakes out to the cove and load up the boat with a fresh haul. Days at the store and on the docks were a part of my life—a part of being Chelsea Davis.

But, three months ago, everything changed.

I heard it. I heard every scream and rhythmic thump. I heard a woman call out my father’s name. Then I saw Eileen Meeks leave my father’s office—hair in a rat’s nest, blouse half-buttoned, and her cheeks redder than Hester Prynne’s scarlet letter.

I panicked. Ran. Threw up in the women’s bathroom. I clung to the toilet until the heaving stopped. No one knew I was there, and Eileen hadn’t spotted me on her way out of the office. When I was certain I could stand without shaking so much, I washed my face and sprinted out of the ladies’ room and right into Derek.

“Chelsea? Did you hear me?” My father hadn’t moved from his spot.

“Yes, I heard you. I’m trying to count the register.” The quicker I started working, the quicker he might actually leave me alone.

“All right.” He sighed. “I’m headed to my office for the morning. I’ve got reports to run.”

I rolled my eyes as I counted out a stack of ones. I had forgotten it was Monday, and that meant my father would be in the store for the first part of the day. It was really the only time during the week when I had to interact with him.

“Have a nice day, sir,” Derek called from the corner of the store.

Once my father turned the corner, I couldn’t hold back. “Seriously, Der. Have a nice day? What is wrong with you?” I hissed.

“He’s my boss, Chelsea. Or do you still think the world revolves around you? Just because you hate him, doesn’t mean I have to.” He reached down with the dustpan and scooped up a pile of yesterday’s dirt.

I rushed from the register to face him. “What did you say?” This morning was progressively getting worse.

He straightened his stance, brushing the hair off his forehead. “Just leave it alone. We’ve got work to do.”

“Work? You think I can work with you glaring at me every chance you get? Now you’re teaming up with my dad like you two are best buddies? You know what he did—what he’s doing. You are the only person I’ve ever told.” I sucked in a big breath of air. “This isn’t work. This is torture.”

I walked back to the register as I heard the jingle of the door. The early customers had arrived for their morning coffee and donuts. Quickly, I tallied the money in the drawer and returned it to its slot. Derek had disappeared. Good, I thought. We needed more distance between us.

It was almost impossible to be in the same room with him since our falling out almost two weeks ago. No more smiles, jokes, or flirty banter. It was like the history we had never existed. I knew I destroyed it the minute I let him kiss me. Regret was an awful roommate who had moved in the night I kicked Derek out, and like terrible roommates, it made everything messy and awkward.

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Ben

I stared at the phone. It didn’t ring as much as it had when I first arrived, but that was because I had talked to everyone but her. They all knew I was hiding out. Except for a few extra calls from Rick, my team seemed to respect my decision to take some time off. What they didn’t realize was that the time off wasn’t temporary.

I watched the steam swirl from the coffee cup and glanced back at the phone. When I woke up this morning, I hadn’t even thought about her. But once I settled into the camper’s red vinyl booth, she was all I could think about. I knew it was time. I opened the missed calls on my screen and tapped her name. It was at the top.

“Ben? Oh my God, Ben.” Her voice was frantic.

“Hey.” I sipped my coffee. I felt steady and calm, something I wasn’t expecting when I heard her voice on the other end of the phone.

“I’ve tried to call and I left messages and texts. Why didn’t you answer any of them? It’s been two weeks.”

The waves rolled onto the shore. These questions were bound to come up. I knew she would have tons of them along with excuses. “Because, Rebecca, I didn’t feel like talking.”

Words tumbled from her mouth. “I know you saw the pictures. And it was a mistake. I promise. Nothing else happened. I was in Hawaii, we had all this down time, and it didn’t mean anything. I swear, Ben. I didn’t know the paps were following me.”

I found that hard to believe. When wasn’t she picture ready? Her explanations didn’t matter. I needed to get this over with.

“What you need to know is that I’m not mad at you. That’s not why I called.” I was already going off script. I had a planned speech, but given the circumstances, it seemed kind of stupid to use.

“But you don’t sound like yourself. I totally get why you’d be mad at me. You have to know the whole thing is a mis—”

“Becs, would you just listen?” I cut her off more harshly than I intended.

“Ok, ok, why did you call? I’m listening.” She exhaled into the phone. I knew her full lips were pouting wherever she was.

“I called to tell you I’m sorry. Sorry about everything that happened.”

“What? I-I don’t understand.” Her voice slowed.

I couldn’t expect her to know the layers behind my words. She hadn’t been along for my soul-searching journey.

“I can’t blame you for spending time with someone else when I wasn’t around. Ever. I checked out a long time ago, Becs. That wasn’t your fault.”

“But you were around. It is my fault. Totally my fault. I’m sorry you saw the pictures. Can we just talk in person? I’ll come to wherever you are. Let’s just talk about this. Please, Ben.”

“Yeah, I don’t think that’s a good idea, darlin’.”

If I even considered trying to put the relationship together again, it was always going to end up this way. I wasn’t in love with her, and I knew it was because I had never given her the time or the chance she deserved. Now with the pictures and the headlines, I wouldn’t be able to get past it long enough for a do-over.

“Now I’m really confused.” She sounded shaky.

I thought about the time we spent together. How the only reason we dated was to play up the romance in Wanted during the premiere month. Both of our publicists had pushed the idea. It was supposed to end there, but we had fallen into a pattern of going out together, posing for pictures, eating in hot-spot restaurants, and spurring the paparazzi frenzy until we couldn’t have pizza delivered without suspecting the pizza guy had a camera in the box. It was a relationship created to fuel our careers, and it had put us both in a fishbowl we couldn’t swim out of. The only difference was that Rebecca thrived in the fishbowl. She loved every flashing camera and autograph request. I only wanted to get a cup of coffee without women tearing at my jacket or giggling profusely when I said hello. It was all too much.

“Rebecca, I think it’s best if we just call this what it is. Over.” I dumped my coffee in the sink and reached in the mini-fridge for a beer.

“But I miss you. Like really miss you. I’m sorry, really sorry.” Her voice cracked and I winced at the sound. I didn’t want to be someone she missed.

I tried to think if I missed her. There was no denying she was beautiful—gorgeous by any man’s standards. But even after the dating had turned from publicity stunt to voluntary, I knew there was something missing. I couldn’t help but think she was with me to toss her star a little higher in the sky. Her love for me always seemed the brightest when a camera was nearby.

“I’m sorry. I called to tell you that and to let you know I’m not mad. I don’t want you to think I’m mad.” According to the grocery store headlines, I was in hiding with a broken heart, plotting a comeback with a bombshell supermodel.

“Can’t you give us another chance? Just talk about it at least? You told me you wanted to take me home to meet your family. We were supposed to go to Texas. Let’s do that. We can go to the ranch and get away from the cameras. I’ve always wanted to see where you live. As much as you talked about Texas I always felt like I’d actually been there with you. We need to be alone. Just you and me.”

It was hard to hear. I didn’t expect it. She wasn’t supposed to fight me on this, but for some reason, Rebecca was grasping at straws and clawing for memories and promises that shouldn’t have been made.

“Darlin’, we both know we were only together for the movie. Don’t spin it into something it wasn’t.”

Although, I was starting to doubt what it was we had. Was she more genuine and sincere than I realized? Maybe I was the one doing the spinning. Everything was muddled and blurry.

It didn’t matter. We couldn’t start over. The media would always be the third person in our relationship, and I was done living my love life on the front page.

“Damn it, Ben. It was not just a publicity tactic. That trip to Cabo? We fucked an entire weekend. That meant something to me. And that night in San Francisco? Really, that was all for our images? There were no cameras; it was you and me. You’re a real asshole, you know that!”

I took a swig of the cold beer. At least if she was mad at me she would stop trying to stir up feelings. “I just needed to say it. Set things straight. Ok?” I paused. “Take care, Becs. Maybe we’ll run into each other again.” This was not the time to tell her I had walked my last red carpet. That would really set her off.

“Take care? Who am I even talking to? Why didn’t you just text me a break up?”

I sighed. “It’s not even a break up. You moved on weeks ago. You slept with someone else. This is more of a good-bye.”

“I told you I was sorry about Hawaii. Ben, come on. Tell me where you are. You’re sounding crazy and not like yourself at all. Say something that makes sense. Say something that sounds like Ben Baldwin,” she pleaded.

I closed my eyes. This had to be it. Everything there was to talk about had been said. There wasn’t any reason to drag it out. The longer I stayed on the phone, the longer she had to surprise me with more memories we shared. I didn’t want that.

“Goodbye, Becs.” I slid the phone across the table and finished off the beer.

It was over. She wouldn’t call or text anymore. If she did, it was her own damn fault for not listening. This was all for the better. One day she would realize it. I hoped, for her sake, it didn’t take her two weeks on a lonely beach to figure it out.

***

The water was calm again today. I didn’t know if it was normal for the ocean to be like this two days in a row, but I had a feeling I should make the most of it.

I opened the door to the campground office. “Good morning, Flo.”

“Well, hey, Jake.” She thumbed through a gardening magazine and glanced in my direction.

“I’m headed into town. I was hoping you might be able to tell me if there’s a place to rent those kayaks I keep seeing out there.” I pointed to the orange and blue boats drifting near the shore.

“Kayaks? You mean you’re not going to sit and drink on the beach all day?” She cleared her throat and flipped to a page on summer gardenias.

I shoved my hands in my pockets. I hadn’t cared much about what people thought about me. I didn’t want them to think about me at all, but Flo’s accurate description stung a little. From a distance, I could see where people might get the wrong impression of me.

“I thought I should see the beach from the waterside.” I laughed, trying to charm her with my usual finesse, but she was one woman who wouldn’t take the bait.

“They rent them out there at Davis General Store. Behind the store, there’s a stand on the docks.” The gardenia feature must be fascinating, although I knew they couldn’t grow anything at the campground. There wasn’t any soil, only sand.

“Thanks, Flo. I appreciate it.” I turned for the screen door.

“How’s that book of yours coming along?”

“Book?” I froze. “Oh yeah, it’s going. Taking me a little longer to write than I expected.”

“Good thing you’re here for the whole summer, I guess.” She placed the magazine on the desk.

I couldn’t help but think she saw right through my flimsy cover story. If she did, she didn’t mention it.

“Tell Carl I said hello.” I knew he was down on the beach surf fishing. He was out every day with a pole and a chair.

“Will do.” She picked the magazine up.

I closed the door behind me and strolled to the Jeep. I had left it running in front of the office. It was a small campground, and other than Alice, I thought most people stayed only a night or two before moving on. It made sense Flora would know my habits.

I felt a little guilty about the drinking. The last thing I wanted was to be known as the campground drunk. I turned onto the road that led to the village and vowed to cut back on the beer. Five o’clock was an acceptable cocktail hour—no more beer for breakfast. I leaned over, cranked up a song on the radio, and let the wind blow through my hair.

I hadn’t returned to the general store since my first morning on the island. The grocery store had more produce, and despite all the beer, I did like to have fresh fruit. As I pulled into an open parking space in front of Davis, I noticed the docks behind the store for the first time. There was a wooden stand with Rentals written in blue. It looked like the store carried kayaks, canoes, snorkel sets, and fishing gear.

I hopped on the boardwalk and strolled to the boat slips where the rental stand sat.

As I walked closer, I overheard parts of a disagreement. I kept my hands in my pockets and hung back close to the corner of the store. Whoever was talking needed a minute to figure things out.

“Der, you can’t be serious. You are quitting?”

“Yeah, why is that so unbelievable? You think you know me so well. Didn’t see that one coming, did you?” He smirked.

I recognized the clerk who had helped me with the beer. That guy had seemed a lot nicer in the store, and there was the girl who wrote notes on the register paper. I had forgotten how pretty she looked. Right now, she looked mad.

“Don’t be such an ass. There is no reason to quit.” Her hands were on her hips.

“I don’t want to work here anymore. I don’t want to see you at the store every day. I’m tired of covering for you, and I got another job.”

“Another job?” Her voice was shrill. I watched as the guy walked from behind the counter, out onto the pier. I was starting to think this wasn’t the best time to rent a kayak. Maybe another day.

“Yeah, Chelsea. Another job.”

“Don’t leave like this,” she pleaded.

“What’s this, son?” A deeper voice emerged in the discussion. “You’re leaving?” he asked.

I peeked around the corner. The two store clerks had been joined by a man probably in his fifties. This was getting more awkward.

“Mr. Davis, sorry for you to hear this way, but I’ve taken another position.” His voice might have cracked.

The man glared at the pair. “Let me guess, this has something to do with Chelsea.”

“Dad, that’s not fair. I had no idea he was leaving.”

I watched as the man turned his back on the girl. “Derek, I’m sorry for whatever has happened. What can I do to keep you on?”

“Mr. Davis, you’ve been really great to me over the years.”

“That doesn’t sound like I have a chance to change your mind.” He sighed. “I hope we can come to an understanding, but if we can’t, I can count on you to work until I find a replacement?”

“No, sir. I’m sorry, but this is my last day at the store. I start tomorrow.” There was an air of triumph in the announcement.

“Der, what are you talking about? Where are you going?” she questioned.

“I’m the new surfing instructor at Wave On.” He looked pleased with himself.

“You know, Derek, why don’t you wait inside for me and I’ll be in to discuss your pay. I need to speak with Chelsea for a second.” The older guy urged the clerk to leave the conversation.

Derek tossed a clipboard on the countertop and walked a few paces on the docks and into the store.

The father turned. “Don’t stand there and tell me you’re not responsible for him leaving.”

“Dad, this is complete news to me, but Derek has a right to change jobs if he wants to.”

“Of course he does, but he has worked here for five years, and all of a sudden, he can’t stand it? How do you expect me to replace an employee like that? Do you have any idea what you’ve done? Any idea at all?”

The tears were welling in her eyes. Even from fifteen feet away I could see them. I also saw her biting her bottom lip. She didn’t seem like the type that would cry, but I wasn’t sure I had ever heard anything like this before.

“I can try to talk to him again. I’ll ask him to stay,” she offered.

“No. I think you’ve done enough. In the meantime, you can take over his Thursday shift and—”

“But, that’s my one day off,” she shrieked.

“Maybe after this you’ll learn to respect the boundaries at work.”

“You can’t be serious.”

I watched as she balled her fists on the counter. I didn’t know what was happening between them, but it was messy. I didn’t like the hurt that was on her face. She was being bullied, and I felt a protective instinct kick in. I wanted to help her.

“You’ve left me without a clerk. It’s almost the end of June. Where am I going to find somebody now? All the students have jobs. No one is going to turn up at this point in the summer. Derek was the best employee I had. Five years, Chelsea. He was here five years.”

“I’ll find someone. Calm down.” She pressed the ends of her palms into her cheekbones. I was impressed the tears didn’t fall.

“You think it’s that easy? You think we can replace a worker like him? Fine. It’s your responsibility now. You find someone who is decent and you can have your Thursdays back.” I heard the deck boards creak as he walked back into the store, muttering something under his breath.

The coast was clear. Maybe I could rent that kayak now. That was all I wanted—take one of those blue boats out on the water and glide across the surface. I sucked in a deep breath and stepped one foot around the corner.

And right then, everything changed. I knew I wouldn’t be renting a kayak today.

CHAPTER TWELVE

Chelsea

They were just like the lyrics, always popping up at the most inconvenient time. I brushed the tears off my cheeks and searched the rental stand for something to wipe my eyes. The only thing in my apron pocket was a scrap of paper.

“Damn it, where’s a tissue when I need it?” I pushed the reservation book to the side. Everything looked blurry.

When I walked into work this morning, I knew Derek was acting fidgety. He got that way when he was nervous. After five years at the store, I couldn’t believe he would quit because of me. Because of us. Sure, it was awkward and uncomfortable, but we would have to deal with it. Eventually enough time would pass that we could work together again—at least that’s what I convinced myself. He only needed time. Why couldn’t he see that we were better as friends?

Then my father had to compound the problem. It took every ounce of strength I had not to call him out on the affair. I still wasn’t sure what kept it from flying out of my mouth. I wanted to hit him with it. I wanted him to know that I knew about Eileen and their relationship. However, even when the words were on the tip of my tongue, my throat clamped shut and they wouldn’t come out. If I released those words, it would somehow make the unthinkable a reality. Part of me wanted the affair to be a misunderstanding or a bad dream I couldn’t shake.

I sighed, knowing that it was for the best I didn’t confront him. My mother couldn’t find out this way. For now, I would carry the burden of his betrayal a little longer.

I heard footsteps and knew I needed to get it together. The corner of the apron would have to do.

“Hi.” A customer stood in front of me. His voice was deep.

I flattened the tear-stained apron against the tops of my thighs and pulled my shoulders back.

“Hi. Can I help you?” I asked.

Hopefully, he would rent a snorkel set and be out of here in two minutes. I needed a moment alone to regroup. Being blindsided by so much emotion at once left me feeling off-balance.

“As a matter of fact, I was wondering if you have any job openings. I know it’s a long-shot, but I’m here for the summer and could use a little extra spending money.”

I looked at the guy. He was vaguely familiar. I thought I remembered him from a couple of weeks ago, but he didn’t have that beard and it was hard to remember all the customers who came through the store.

“You heard all of that, didn’t you?” I asked.

I didn’t believe him for a second. I hoped he had only caught the end of the disagreement between my dad and me.

He adjusted his sunglasses to the top of his head. “All I heard is that you are in charge of hiring, and I am here to be hired.” He smiled, and I tried to figure out what the look was in his eyes. They were warm, soft, and a gray-green color that blended in with the water on the horizon.

Yes, I definitely recognized that grin. He had been here before and forgotten a case of beer.

“Do you have a name?” I asked.

He had sandy brown hair that probably hadn’t seen a cut in a few weeks. He reminded me a little of Pearce Taylor on the Carolina football team. It was the height and the broad shoulders.

“Jake. What about you?” He searched my apron for a name tag.

“Chelsea. Chelsea Davis.” I pointed to the sign behind his head. “Part of the great Davis General Store dynasty.”

“That seems like a pretty cool gig. You get to work out here all summer. Not a bad view.”

I noticed his eyes were locked on me and not on the boats in the marina or the waves out in the ocean. It made my neck warm, and I wondered if the color had risen to my cheeks.

“What are you doing here this summer, Jake with-no-last-name? Do you have any retail experience?” If he was truly interested in taking Derek’s position, the least I could do was vet him a little.

He took his time with his words. Nothing about this guy said, “I’m in a hurry.” For someone not from the island, he seemed at ease on the docks.

“I’m a writer. Spending the summer on Brees to—uh—write.” He shoved his hands in his pockets.

My eyes shot to his. “Writer? You’re an actual writer? What do you write? Books? Are you a journalist?” I had a sudden shot of adrenaline. “Any chance you write music? Because I’m a songwriter.”

I knew I was pelting him with questions with no space between to answer, but this was exciting. An actual writer. It didn’t matter if he wrote menus. At least he wrote.

“I—uh—I’m working on a book.”

I tried to picture the scruffy, athletic-looking man buried behind a laptop, or scribbling out words in a notebook.

“I can’t believe this. A writer. But if you’re working on a book this summer, why do you want a job here?” I knew this might mean he wasn’t a successful writer.

He shifted in his flip-flops. “Like I said, I need a little extra summer spending cash, and it sounded like you needed some help. I can fill in for a few weeks until you find someone more permanent. That way you can keep those Thursdays.”

My stomach twisted. He might have heard the entire conversation. How mortifying.

“What about your last name? Would I know any of your books?” How cool would it be if I had actually read something of his?

I could tell he was searching the boat slips behind me, but I didn’t know for what.

“It’s Grady. Jake Grady. And it’s my first book, so you wouldn’t have heard of me. I’m still an unknown.”

That didn’t matter to me. I was an unknown too.

“That’s ok. All writers have to start somewhere. So what’s it about?”

“What’s what about?” He tilted his head.

I dropped my hands from my hips. “Your book. What’s the story?” I asked.

“Is this your standard job interview?” He cocked his eyebrow.

“Right. Sorry.” It was official. I was blushing now. The word “writer” had derailed my initial line of questioning. I stopped for a second.

“But you haven’t even asked what the pay is or the job. Don’t you want to know what the responsibilities are? Hours? That kind of thing?”

“I’ll take it. Doesn’t matter,” he answered.

“Doesn’t matter?”

“I mean, yeah it matters, but it’s temporary.” He leaned on the counter with his elbows and winked. “Does this mean I got the job?”

This was the first job interview I had ever conducted. I wasn’t sure this was the typical protocol for hiring, but I wasn’t going to second-guess myself. For some reason, a flirty writer with a shaggy beard, but undeniably cute smile had appeared out of nowhere—of course he got the job.

“Yes, you’re hired.” I reached a hand toward him. “Welcome to Davis General Store.”

“All right. What day do you need me to start?” He shook my hand.

“Right now. Aprons are on the hooks in the employee hallway. Go grab one and meet me back here. I’ll give you the tour. We can start training this morning.”

After a crappy morning, things had turned around rather quickly. The sickening pit that had formed in my stomach when Derek quit had been replaced by something that was hard to describe. It was like warm honey soothed my anxiousness every time he smiled.

“Right now? As in you want me to start working today?” His eyebrows arched.

“You do want the job, don’t you?” For someone who was persistent a minute ago, he was certainly backpedaling.

“Yep. I’m on it. Going to get that apron right now.” He smiled, filling me with that soothing feeling again.

I watched as he walked away, his shadow following his long frame on the pier. I bit my lip, wondering if hiring a total stranger off the docks was the best decision. Something about him felt undeniably right, like the song I had written last night—slow and easy. And with all the tension swirling in my life right now, there was nothing I needed more.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Ben

What in the hell had I just done? I saw her crying, her auburn hair floating around her, petite shoulders hunched as she fought the emotions. I couldn’t stop myself. I had to swoop in and make her smile like one of the girls in my movies. Fuck. I reached for the row of aprons on the hooks, as she had instructed, and slipped one over my head. This wouldn’t have to last long. I was sure she could find a clerk replacement in a few days. In the meantime, I would fill my time doing something constructive, and if I was being honest, it wouldn’t be such a bad thing to spend that time around her.

I pushed the screen door open and walked toward the rental booth. I spun around.

“What do you think? It’s my first time in an apron.”

She scrunched up her nose. “These aprons don’t look good on anyone. You can thank my father for that.”

I looked at my chest and wondered for a second if I had laid off the workouts for too long. Was there actually a woman in the world immune to my charm? “All right, then. What’s next?”

“Why don’t we start with something simple like the rental booth? We’re already out here.” She hung a lifejacket on a hook on the sidewall and clipped the straps together.

Assessing the stand, I didn’t think renting out equipment would be too complicated. It had been a long time since I had bagged groceries at the local food market back home in Shiner, but I remembered the cadence of working in a store. This would be easy.

“Ok. Train away. I’m all ears.” I nodded at a couple as they walked by, cameras dangling around their necks. I realized this might be the best way to blend in to island life—just be one of the locals.

She cleared her throat. “The first thing we always do in the booth is open all the windows, turn on the fans, and when I’m working, I turn on the music.” She reached over toward the radio and hit the power button.

“Nice. I think I like this even more.” I recognized one of the songs I had heard in the Jeep. “What’s this music called?”

“You haven’t heard beach music before?”

“Can’t say I have, but I like the words.” I always judged a song by the lyrics. If it didn’t mean anything, why even bother with the music?

Chelsea’s mood seemed to have improved in the last hour. There wasn’t a trace of a tear on her cheeks. I kept getting distracted by her blue eyes. Every time she smiled at me they sparked. It was enough to sidetrack any man.

She giggled. “My parents and all their friends love it. So it’s kind of like oldies. I can see how you would hear that sound. I’ve grown up listening to it.”

“So you like beach music and what else?” I thought of a few of my favorite country artists and wondered if she had ever heard them. The best were the ones who wrote music too.

She fidgeted with her apron. “Me? Oh I like everything. Anything that has depth in the words.” She scrunched her nose. “You probably don’t want to get me started on words. I can talk for hours about lyrics.”

It didn’t bother me if she wanted to talk about music. I wondered what words spoke to her. Right now, my favorite songs were about getting lost. She probably couldn’t relate. No one could.

“Hey, do we get to take them out?” I eyed the row of boats next to the stand.

“Not during our shifts, we don’t, but I guess it would be ok after work.”

Maybe I could still work in some paddling today. “You know, I think it would help me get a better understanding of the business and the equipment if we took the boats out. You should take me.”

She stopped fiddling with the lifejacket clips. “You want to go kayaking? With me?” She turned to face me.

“Why not? You did say you’d give me on-the-job training.” I watched her think over the invitation. I was glad she wasn’t crying anymore—at least I had accomplished something important today. Her face was too pretty for tears.

“True, but I’m not much of a kayaker. And—”

“Stop trying to come up with excuses and just take me out. Ok?”

I grinned wider than I intended. I might be actually trying to get a reaction from her, and that was something I never did. Women naturally reacted when I was around. Not this one. She was different, and I liked that about her.

I walked behind the booth and glanced over her shoulder at the rental checklist. As my chest brushed her shoulder, I felt her stiffen, so I moved to the side. The flirting came so effortlessly to me that it was like breathing. Usually, I didn’t think about it, but now that I had removed myself from girls, and people in general, everything about this interaction seemed heightened. The way her hair smelled, the look she gave me, the hesitation in her response—all of it was like part of a dance I had been missing. A slow dance.

“Ok, I’ll take you. But, as part of the training.” She turned to face me. “You’re right; you should be familiar with the rental equipment.”

“Ah-ha.” I felt slightly triumphant. Wilderness Ben had not lost his touch. “It will be fun, dar— It will be fun.” I slid the clipboard across the counter, hoping to cover up my fumble. “So, tell me what we have here.”

“This is the checklist we use every time someone rents a piece of equipment. They have to fill out this sheet. Let’s start at the top.”

***

“Do we get breaks around here?” I thought it had to be close to lunchtime. My stomach was growling, and I could go for one of those barbecue sandwiches I saw a customer pack on the back of his kayak.

Chelsea was scribbling something on a piece of paper. “Huh?”

“Lunch. Can I break for a few?” I tried to catch her eye, but she was buried in a small notebook.

“Sure. Sure. Whatever. Thirty minutes I guess.” She whispered something as her pen furiously inked out another line.

“Ok.” I untied my apron. “I’ll be back in a few.” I waited for her to respond, but I was certain I could jump off the deck at this point and she wouldn’t notice.

I followed the boardwalk around the cove. There were bait shops and a few restaurants along the marina waterfront. It was like something you would see in an idyllic movie scene, although these people were real. I smiled at the thought as I tugged on the door handle of one of the sandwich shops.

Fifteen minutes later, I emerged from the cafe, satisfied the hunger pains had subsided. I looked toward the end of the docks and spied an ice cream stand. I strolled in that direction and got in line behind a family of five. The couple argued over whether their children could eat the ice cream out of cones versus cups. I smiled, thinking if that was the dilemma of the day, it was a damn good problem to have.

“What can I get you?” The ice cream attendant squinted from the sun.

At first the plan was to sit here and watch the boats sail by while I still had ten minutes left on my break, but when I spotted the bucket of chocolate, I had another idea. All girls like chocolate.

“One strawberry and one chocolate.”

“Cones?” The man already had his scoop in the cooler.

“Yep. I think we can handle cones.” I handed him cash and accepted the two heaping cones, already dripping from the heat. I would have to hurry to get them back to the rental stand before they completely melted.

“Thank you. Enjoy the day.” The man turned to face the next family behind me.

“Thanks.” I tasted the strawberry before launching into a full sprint back to the store.

Chelsea was exactly where I left her. Her nose pointed at the notebook as she scrawled words across the pages.

“Brought you something.” I shoved the cone in her direction, dripping chocolate everywhere.

“Uh—what the—?” She looked up, annoyed that her pages were splattered with the sticky treat.

“Shit.” I scrambled for a paper towel. “I didn’t mean to spill it.” I tried to clean the mess up for her.

“No. No. I’ve got it.” She brushed my hand away. “It’s probably better with chocolate all over it.” Her eyes rose to mine and I caught a glimmer of laughter.

“Tell me you at least like chocolate. Did I screw that up too?”

She bit her bottom lip as the corners of her mouth rose. “Actually, my favorite is strawberry. But, it’s good. I’ll eat it.”

I chuckled. I was striking out left and right. I shifted the cones and placed the strawberry one in front of her. “Take this one.”

“No, it’s yours.” She shook her head.

“I’ve already ruined your page. Just take it.” I held the cone next to her hand.

She wrapped her fingers around the paper sleeve, touching the top of my hand in the process. I lingered for another second. Her eyes made me forget whatever witty comebacks I had planned. I chuckled under my breath.

“Something funny?” She licked the top of the strawberry swirl.

“No. Just learning a lot today.”

I crunched on the side of the cone and stepped out of the booth. A party boat was headed out of the marina. I needed to study it to clear my head for a second and try to remember who in the hell I was.

***

“Five o’clock is quittin’ time, right?” I spied my new boss eyeing the clock.

In the last few hours Chelsea had shown me the employee entrance, the ins and outs of the rental stand, the general layout of the store, and given me my schedule. What kind of screwed up plan was this? I had to be at the store at five thirty in the morning. This would go down as one of the not-so-smart ideas of the summer.

Admittedly, I’d had a good time. She was cute, funny, and it had been awhile since I had met such a smartass. Most girls were so afraid to scare me off that they wouldn’t speak their minds. Going on dates was like watching fan blades spin around; it was an endless exercise of the same old garbage.

She smiled. “Yes. We’re done for the day. Why don’t you take these inside?” She tossed her apron into my chest. “Still want to go out paddling?” Her head tipped to the side, and I noticed the sun caught strands of her hair, turning them a bright honey color.

“Of course. Be right back.” I untied the canvas string and ducked inside the screen door. I had been waiting all day for this. Every time I saw a boat sail past I wanted to hop aboard and drift out to open waters.

The sun was so intense at this time of day. The only thing keeping my eyes from watering was my sunglasses. The rays smacked me in the face as soon as I walked back on the dock. I watched as Chelsea struggled to hold up one kayak while unhooking the suspension cord to keep the boat upright. If she let go, it would knock her in the head.

“Hey, let me help you with that.” I jogged over and braced the boat as she set it free.

“Thanks. This one was a little tighter than I expected.” She placed her hands on the sides of the kayak and dragged it to the open boat launch. “Can you get yours on your own?”

I laughed. “I think I can manage.” I flipped the handle on the lever and released the kayak into my arms.

I started toward the launch and noticed she was already ten yards out in the water.

“Hey, I thought we were paddling together!” I shouted.

“We are. See if you can catch up.” With that, she dipped the end of her paddle in the water and made a deep stroke next to her kayak, propelling her farther ahead.

I recognized a challenge when I saw one. My competitive quarterback side kicked in as I ran toward the launch. I tossed the kayak forward and jumped into the open seat. I fumbled with the paddle until I had an even stroke, crossing my chest like a figure eight. She was fast, surprisingly fast, but I knew I could catch her.

Instead of turning into the open sound water, she steered into a creek where she seemed to be able to pick up speed. I sliced the paddle through the water, pressing hard with my shoulders. I caught her smile as she looked over her shoulder to gauge the distance between us. She continued to steer straight as the creek narrowed. The rows of houses and piers were behind us.

Only a few more yards. I was so close. Adrenaline surged through my veins, and I felt my heart pump harder as I worked to overtake her boat. I plunged the tip deeper into the water, sending me within inches of her back. The bow of my boat sailed past hers. I jumped up victoriously.

“Yes! Gotcha. Yes! Yes!”

“Sit down!” she screamed, but it was too late.

“Whoa-whoa-whoa!” I rocked back and forth on my feet trying to steady myself, but I had already disturbed the natural balance of the boat.

“Jake!” She managed to yell my fake name before I landed on her kayak, flipping both of us over and into the saltwater creek.

I popped to the surface, realizing I could touch the murky bottom.

“You ok?” I sputtered the words as I reached for my capsized victim. I thought I felt something brush past my leg, and I knew it wasn’t Chelsea.

“What in the hell?” She brushed her hair out of her face and spit out a mouthful of water.

“Sorry about that. I guess I got a little carried away with my victory.” I shrugged in apology.

“Victory? I didn’t know it was an official race. I was just kidding around.” She grabbed onto the side of her boat and tossed the paddle in the cockpit. She looked mad.

I stared at her. What had gotten into me? I had sped through the marina and creek like a NASCAR driver. An incredibly fast and triumphant driver, yes. But still I may have let things get out of hand. The last thing I wanted was to piss her off.

“And I thought you weren’t much of a kayaker,” I teased. Obviously, she had downplayed her aquatic skills. I should have known better. The girl grew up on an island and ran a kayak stand.

I couldn’t stop staring. This was stronger than the urge to race after her in the boat. Her white T-shirt clung to her skin, the water making it almost transparent. My eyes landed on the lacy outline of her bra. It was hard to miss with the way her chest was heaving. The scalloped edges stuck to the tops of her perfectly round breasts. Damn.

“You could help me with this part.” Her voice jerked my eyes away from her chest.

“What?” At least I was able to keep myself from stammering.

“Help me get back in the kayak,” she urged. I thought she noticed where my eyes had been.

The water was almost chest-deep for her and even though she tried several times to hoist herself into the cockpit, it was proving impossible without a boost.

I reached below the surface of the water and wrapped my hands on either side of her waist.

“Here we go. One. Two. Three.” At the end of the count, I shifted her upward, giving her room to toss her leg over the side.

“Thanks. Think you can manage to get in yours by yourself? I don’t think I can help you from here, but you can always swim back.” She adjusted the paddle in her hand and began spinning around to face me.

My kayak had drifted a few yards from us. “I’ve got this. No problem.” I swam over to the boat and surveyed how I was going to get back onboard without making an idiot of myself for the second time.

I was almost a professional athlete. I rarely called in a stunt double on the movie sets. I could get back in a kayak.

“You ok over there?” She floated closer.

“Yep.” I eyed the boat again and decided just to go for it. Damn any more embarrassment.

I pressed hard with his palms and lifted my frame out of the water. Nailed it. I grabbed the paddle and circled toward her. Now that I was in the boat, I realized how uncomfortable my wet T-shirt was. I laid the paddle across my knees and peeled the shirt over my chest. The warmth of the sun’s rays felt good as they hit my shoulders.

And there it was on her face. The reaction I had tried all day to get. I allowed myself a satisfied smile. Just as I began revel in my true victory, Chelsea took her eyes off my chest. She was distracted by her kayak colliding into mine. I toppled back into the salty creek.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Chelsea

“Sorry. Oh my God, I’m so sorry.” I floated closer to Jake, overboard again. He was smiling and searching the water for his shirt. “I wasn’t paying attention.” I wasn’t going to tell him it was because the water running down his sculpted abs had made me lose any sense of reality.

“I think we can say we’re even.” He plucked his shirt from the water and wrung it out before tossing it into the boat.

I noticed he didn’t seem mad. I had been more than annoyed when he sent me tumbling into the creek. The only reason I had agreed to take him out was so that I could ask him more about his writing. Somehow, that had turned into a race and now we were both soaking wet. I hadn’t even gotten in the first question about his book.

“Maybe we should get back to the docks before either of us goes overboard again,” I suggested.

I followed every muscle along his back with my eyes as he hoisted himself into the seat. I had no idea all of that was under his T-shirt when I hired him. I bit hard on my lip and closed my eyes, willing myself not to think all kinds of dirty thoughts. Like how those muscles might feel under my fingertips and pressed against me. No, bad idea—very irresponsible and dangerous idea.

“Sure. Maybe we can try this again another time.” He smiled at me as he breezed past in his kayak.

I paddled, matching his slow pace. He sat relaxed, cruising slowly enough to see an egret in the marsh and a turtle slip off a log. There was so much more to see when you weren’t racing through. The orange hues of the sun cast the entire creek into a fiery dream. I could tell he was taking it all in.

“So, what do you think of Brees Island?” I was almost completely parallel to him. We glided at a steady rhythm, unlike our earlier sprint.

“It’s got something I’ve been searching after for a long time.” He sounded pensive. A mullet hopped in front of us.

“Really? What could that possibly be? We don’t even have a movie theater.”

I knew that vacationers loved the island. The beaches were beautiful and the seafood was always fresh, but they didn’t know what it was really like. If anyone of them had spent a winter here, they would think differently. Everything shut down. The tourists were gone, the landscape turned brown, and the chill from the humid winds cut right to the bone.

“No movie theater? Well, that explains some things.” He eased into the boat launch.

I waited until my bow touched the incline of the ramp before hopping to the side. “Yeah, no movie theater, no mall, no hospital. It’s like we’re cut off from civilization out here.”

“Sounds perfect, if you ask me.” He rested the paddle in the cockpit as he stepped out of the boat.

“Perfect? Where are you from? It’s boring and there’s nothing to do. I miss Chapel Hill and people who are interesting.”

I hadn’t stopped mourning college life. I’d finished grad school over a month ago. But sometimes I still felt like I was home on summer break, waiting for classes to start back up in the fall. I felt a sense of accomplishment for getting my second degree, but there was nothing good about college being over. I missed it every day I was here. I knew if I didn’t have a job lined up by September, I would have to stay on this island doing the same thing, day after day with no end in sight.

“I guess I don’t need much entertainment.” He winked as he turned to grab my boat and lift it into the rack.

It was a simple gesture, a flirty gesture I had received hundreds of times. But this was the first time I felt giddy, like I had just had a few sips of wine. I wanted him to do it again.

“That’s not what I mean. I know how to have a good time. But living on an island, you see the same people, have the same conversations, hear the same news over and over again. I miss meeting new people. The ones I haven’t known my whole life.”

“Would you consider a writer an interesting person?” he asked.

He was bold. It didn’t take much interaction with him to know he was a professional flirt, but I couldn’t help but like it. He was good at it.

“Maybe. Depends on the writing.” It didn’t hurt to flirt a little. My back was turned, but I heard him laugh. It made me grin.

“I see.” He lifted the kayak next to me. “I’m from a small town too. It’s not all that bad. There’s something to be said for people knowing who you really are.”

“Right. Like knowing when you sneak out of your parents’ house when you’re twelve, or everyone knowing you made straight As on your report card, or did you like the part about people giving you advice on what you should do with your life?”

I tightened the loops of the straps and made sure the kayaks wouldn’t fall over when we stepped away.

“Agreed. That part of small town life is rough, but it’s home. You can travel the world and live in twenty different cities, but deep down, there is only one home. You’ve got to love this place.”

I knew the answer he was expecting to hear from me. It would be too complicated to tell him how much I loved the island, but at the same time how much we needed a break from each other. Brees was stifling me.

“I do. I will always love it, but that doesn’t mean I have to stay.” This conversation had suddenly turned more serious than I wanted. The more he talked, the more I kept revealing. It was already a bad habit.

“I get it. Sometimes you have to leave home for a while to realize it’s the place you’re really supposed to be.” His hand gripped the kayak even though I had already secured it. It was as if he needed the extra balance.

“Speaking from experience?” I asked, wondering what had made him so pensive. All day he had been nothing but smiles.

“You could say that. I just miss home some days more than others.” He stepped back from the row of boats and adjusted his sunglasses.

I knew there was truth in what he said. I liked to remember my college days as the perfect escape from the island, but there were times when I missed the ocean sounds and friendly faces of home. Wherever Jake was from must be calling to him right now.

I tried to run my hands through my hair, but the creek water had tangled it. “Well, thanks for everything today.”

“Everything?”

“Yeah, taking the job. You really bailed me out this morning.”

The argument with my father and Derek turning in his notice seemed like it was days ago. What were the chances I would be able to fill the position so quickly?

“But, I need to change out of these clothes, and you might want to put on a shirt.” It was hard to talk to him while he stood dripping, shirtless, and looking incredibly edible.

He looked at his shorts and laughed. “Maybe not a bad idea. So, what time do I need to be here in the morning? Is it really five thirty?”

Finally, someone who recognized five thirty was the most ridiculous time to go to work. “Yes, sorry about that part. The fishermen are in early. They like to get their coffee and donuts.”

He slung his shirt over his shoulder. “All right. I’ll see you in the morning.” He turned and started walking toward the parking lot.

“Jake. Wait.” The words were out before I could take them back.

“Yeah?” He looked as confused as I felt.

“Since you’re new and everything, would you want to get something to eat? But, totally not a big deal if you can’t, because you’re probably tired and you need to change and then you have to be here so early and—”

“Sure.”

My pulse whirled, making me slightly off balance.

“Oh, really? Cool.” I hadn’t thought past the invitation.

“I have an idea. Why don’t you come to my place? I have a feeling it’s part of the island you might not know so well. Maybe it will be something different.”

“Have dinner at your place?”

My stomach flipped. This was starting to feel like a date. When he had started walking away, a part of me wanted him to stay a little longer. But a date? That was something else. I questioned why I would be resistant to him though. He was cute and sexy. He had made me laugh all day, and he had this crazy calming effect on me that was hard to ignore.

“I can’t guarantee it will be the best meal, but yeah, let’s try it. Consider it my thank you for the job.”

I didn’t know how to react. Dinner was crossing the line, but it was hard to explain how something about him put me at ease—no matter how many times I caught him checking me out today.

“Yeah, we can talk about writing,” I suggested.

I had tried all day to bring it up, but he kept asking work-related questions. Maybe over dinner I would get to ask him if words hit him like they did me. If he woke up in the middle of night with a life or death mission to get the words out. Yes, there were things I definitely wanted to ask him.

“But since you dunked me in the creek, I need to change. Give me the address and I’ll meet you in an hour.”

He smiled. “Ok. I’m at the Brees Campground, last trailer on the right. You’ll see the name, Silver Sand Dollar.”

“I don’t know what to make fun of first: the campground or the name.” I giggled and pulled my bike from the rack.

“It’s high living for me.” He retrieved a pair of keys from his soggy shorts. “See you in an hour.”

“Bye.” I grasped the handlebars and pushed down on the pedals—half-watching him walk away, and half-watching the road in front of me.

In an hour’s time, I would be having dinner with a handsome writer. I didn’t think I could imagine up a better ending to my day if I tried.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Ben

I spun into my usual parking space near the Sand Dollar, and raced into the camper. It looked like a tornado had blasted through the place. What was I thinking asking a girl over? Two weeks of solitude were starting to take their toll on my judgment. I shook my head and started hiding all signs of my bachelor lifestyle.

I pulled the trash from the bin and tied the sack. As soon as I walked out of the camper, Alice stopped me. This was her usual time to hit the sand for beachcombing.

“Hey, stranger. Haven’t seen you all day,” she purred.

“Hey, Alice.” I didn’t have time for this. “I’m kind of in a hurry.”

“Oh shoot. I was going to ask if you wanted to come over for a beer after my walk. I have your favorite. You drink that Texas stuff, right?”

“That’s real nice of you, but actually, I have a friend coming over tonight.” Maybe this was the deterrent this woman needed. If she saw me with another girl, she might take the hint.

“Oh, that’s too bad. But, baby, don’t worry. That beer won’t go bad. We’ll just do it another time.” She patted me on the shoulder and headed down to the beach.

I was convinced nothing would dissuade her. I clutched the trash bag in my hand and jogged to the dumpster near the office. I still had a few minutes to jump in the shower before Chelsea arrived.

***

I looked in the mirror one more time and rubbed my palm against the smoothness of my jaw. I looked more like myself than I had in weeks. I liked the beard, but it wasn’t really me. It was a part of letting everything go in my life—diet, friends, career. But I liked my face better this way.

There was a small amount of cologne in a bottle in my overnight bag. I pressed halfway on the trigger. This was feeling more and more like a date. I couldn’t argue, Chelsea had been the one to ask me to get dinner. But I took the reins and asked her over here. I hadn’t set out to make a date with her or any girl this summer. As far as I was concerned, I was off the market. Becs had made sure to cure me from wanting any more dates.

Tonight was all about having a good time.

I pushed open the camper door to check on the fire I lit before showering. The coals were blazing . I hoped she liked steak, because that was what was on the menu. So many girls I dated ate salads and fat-free cardboard, I didn’t know what real girls ate anymore.

I smiled thinking back to her expression when we tumbled into the creek. She was more real than any girl I had been around in a long time.

I rolled the sleeves on my plaid shirt and slid my feet into my new flip-flops. I knew I looked like a combination of a Texas boy and a Carolina transplant, but I felt comfortable in the khaki shorts and my old shirt. It was better than a tux.

I heard music blaring from Pirate’s Booty. Alice must be back from her walk to collect seashells. She had buckets of them all over her yard. I didn’t understand why she brought new ones back every day, but then I didn’t understand much about her.

The fire blazed as I poked it a few times with a skewer. The moon was bright on the horizon as I tried to pick out a few stars. The sky never looked the same as it did in Texas. My heart hurt a little thinking about Texas, back when life was easy and simple. I missed the ranch. But the surf pounding in the distance reminded me I wasn’t done here. It wasn’t time to leave yet, even though I didn’t know who or what had set the timer. It just wasn’t time.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Chelsea

The last time I had been to Brees Campground was after prom my senior year of high school. A big group of us had parked in the tent spaces and run off to the beach. It could have been the full moon or maybe the freedom graduation offered right around the corner, but whatever it was, my friends and I splashed in cocktail dresses, chased each other on the beach, and laughed harder than I could remember. Prom night went down as one of my favorites ever. And here I was again, more than six years later, meeting an almost total stranger for dinner.

I slowed my car along the gravel drive that bordered the horseshoe of camper trailers. I didn’t remember the names being so funny. Under the Seashell? I might have to write these into a parody song.

There was Jake’s Jeep next to Silver Sand Dollar. I touched up my lip gloss again and ran my fingers through my hair. This was only dinner with a new summer resident, I told myself for the twentieth time. I took a deep breath before climbing out of the car and walking to the silver camper.

All day I knew he had flirted with me, but it was different than the advances coming from Derek. Jake was confident and sure of himself. He didn’t pout or punish me if I didn’t flirt back. In fact, it seemed to make him smile more, the more I resisted his innuendos.

It had been surprising spending the day with him. I caught myself laughing unexpectedly and teasing him when I knew I shouldn’t. He took everything in stride and nothing about the store stressed him out.

What I really wanted to know was how long he had been writing and if he had any advice to launch me into the writing world. I needed any help I could get to break into the music business. It was worth a shot.

I noticed two chairs arranged in front of the fire. I tapped on the door, feeling a surge of nerves begin to take hold.

He swung the door open and greeted me with a smile and a smooth face.

“Wow. Hey.” I stood, staring at the once scruffy jaw. “I—uh—you look good without the beard.”

“Thanks.” He rubbed his cheek. “After the dip in the creek today, I thought it was about time. Saltwater and facial hair are not a good combination. I’m not really a beard guy.”

“Oh, I thought it was part of the whole writer thing.” I tried to make a joke to cover my persistent staring. His face looked so different. So handsomely different. And there were dimples when he smiled. It took restraint not to reach toward him and touch his cheek.

“I’ve got beer. Want one?” He revealed two longneck bottles in his hand and stepped back so I could enter the camper.

Everything was red and white like a perpetual picnic. I took a beer from him and reached for a towel to twist off the top. These tops always hurt my palm.

“Nice place.”

“Thanks. It’s twenty-two feet of home for the summer. Want a tour? We can start dinner in a minute.” He shuffled me to the center of the room.

“Definitely. Show me the chateau.” I looked around the small space, wondering where he wrote.

“All right. This here is the culinary den of the place.” He pointed to the quaint kitchenette. “And this is the breakfast nook.” I liked how the table and bench jutted out, giving a better view of the ocean.

He walked toward the back of the camper. “The master suite, complete with a bed. Yeah, that’s all that’s in here. And of course the master bath. If you turn just right, you can fit in the shower. I think I’ve learned new contortionist skills this summer.”

I sized him up against the tiny shower, and wondered how someone with such broad shoulders managed to squeeze in there.

“Wow, looks like you have everything you need.” I took a swig of the beer.

“It is pretty damn perfect. This is the living room, I guess.” A red couch ran along the inside wall. He walked two steps to the kitchen and retrieved a plate of steaks from the mini-fridge. “You eat meat, don’t you?”

“Of course.”

He sighed. “Good. I was worried for a second. But this is what I’ve got. Come on. Let’s get these cowboy steaks on the fire.”

“Cowboy steaks?” I had never heard of that before.

“Yeah, you’ll see. Come on.” He led me through the door and motioned to one of the chairs. “All right, so we just throw them on the fire, and in ten minutes, they’ll be done.”

“You mean like on a roaster stick?” I looked around for the utensils we needed to spear the steaks.

He laughed. “No, like this.” He grabbed one of the steaks off the plate and tossed it into the center of the fire where it sizzled on the hot coals. “Want me to do yours?”

“No way.” I chunked it into the flames right next to his.

“Nice throw.”

“Thanks.” I tipped the bottle back and watched as the steaks bubbled under the heat.

Jake settled into the chair. “So, tell me, songwriter, what kind of music do you write?”

I blinked. People didn’t usually ask about my music. They usually acted like I didn’t write at all. Everyone on the island knew I wrote music. I’d been doing it since the third grade, but that didn’t mean it was accepted as a way to make a living. This was a chance to have an actual conversation about the words that swirled in my head and seeped from my pores.

“Anything and everything,” I replied. Ok, well that was about as vague and shallow an answer as I could muster.

“Oh, that kind of music,” he teased.

I nudged him with my elbow. “I meant that I don’t really try to write a certain song. I let the words hit me, and then I write it. It’s kind of hard to explain, but I feel it, I don’t think it.”

I chugged on the beer, thinking maybe my first answer was better than my second. That was too much. He would surely think I was some kind of abstract artist who needed to be secluded in an artist-only loony colony.

“How did you learn to write lyrics?” He kicked at one of the logs with his foot. He seemed comfortable with the fire.

“It’s not something I went to school for. I think of it like poetry, I guess. I see the words together or feel them together.”

“Feel them?”

I twirled the bottle until I heard the beer sloshing. He had turned to face me, and I realized he was listening. His eyes scanned mine and his forehead fixed in concentration. “Yes, it’s a feeling, but it comes out as lyrics. It’s hard to explain.”

“It makes sense to me. Those are my favorite songs. The ones that actually mean something—not just rambling strung together to fit a beat, but words with soul.”

I followed his eyes, wishing it wasn’t getting dark so I could see the flecks of green. Right now, he was looking at me as if he understood everything I said and more, and I wanted to capture that look in his eyes and memorize it.

He broke the silence. “If you didn’t go to school for music, what did you study?” he asked.

I rolled my eyes. “Oh, that? My master’s is actually in education. My parents want me to be a teacher. We compromised on me teaching music.”

“Well, that sounds like a sensible idea. You get to do both, right?”

“No, not really. All I want to do is write. I’m sending songs out every week to labels, and any day I’m going to sell one. I really want a contract so I can move. I’ll pay my dad back for college and grad school and I’ll be done with this nightmare.” I gripped the bottle in my hand like it could steady me. I didn’t mean to get so worked up.

“Nightmare? I guess you’re talking about what I overhead this morning on the docks.”

He turned to look at me. It wasn’t pity in his eyes. It was the same look he had at the kayak stand—understanding and warmth. The kind of look I wouldn’t mind seeing more of. I liked the way it felt when he looked at me that way.

I tried to explain. “It’s a long story, but you could say I had a falling out with my dad recently and I’m ready to move on. First, I owe him for my tuition. It was part of the deal when I went to grad school. We came to a compromise after I told him I could make a higher starting salary with a master’s degree. I’m supposed to be grateful I got to go, but now it feels like I’m an indentured servant. Half of my pay goes to my tuition bill, and I get the other half.”

The beer was empty, but I wasn’t sure if it was ok to ask for another one so quickly. I liked talking with him, and if he brought me another beer, I would stay and swap stories as long as the fire burned.

Jake stood from his chair. “Why don’t I grab us a few more beers and the plate for the steaks? I’ll be right back.”

I watched as he walked back into the camper and decided a pair of khaki shorts had never looked so good on a man before. My cheeks flushed, wondering if his backside looked as amazing as his chest and arms.

“Here you go.” He returned seconds later with a cold beer. Using a long set of tongs, he reached into the fire and stabbed both of the steaks. “Cowboy steak is served. You ready?”

I nodded.

He handed me silverware and bread. “I’m not much on cooking. It’s steak and bread tonight.”

The hot plate in front of me looked and smelled wonderful. This was plenty. “I love it. Let’s eat.”

He cut into the steak and took a bite. “Mmm…might be my best yet.” He grinned, his mouth full.

“So, I’ve done all the talking. Tell me about where you went to school and your hometown.”

“There’s not much to tell.” He cut into the steak again. “I went to a small Texas school and played some football in college.”

“Football?” I knew he was too naturally athletic not to have been involved in sports of some kind. “What position did you play?”

“I was the quarterback, of course. But after the last concussion, I decided I needed to do something a little safer. I’d like to keep my memories.” He winked.

“So is that how you got into writing? It’s the football safety net? I wouldn’t pair those two things.”

He nodded while tipping a beer back.

“Tell me about your book. I want to know what you’re writing. I feel like I’ve been cut off from writer minds since I moved back home.” I tasted the meat and enjoyed the smoky flavor.

I watched him chew. Finally, he spoke. “I’m taking my time on this one. Just seeing how it goes. I need to feel it.” He winked. “You understand.”

I knew he was trying to distract me and I hated to admit it worked.

“Does that mean you haven’t started yet?” I wondered why he was so reluctant to share his work with me. I felt like I had just given him way too much personal information. I needed him to balance the conversation.

“Something like that.”

“But—”

He cut me off. “Damn it, my neighbor does not understand volume control.” The music from next door had increased several decibels, drowning out the sound of the waves. “Thanks to you, I now know what she’s playing is beach music. Let’s go in. I’ve got speakers inside. We can continue this conversation. I want to hear more about your songs.”

Slightly flustered, I clutched my drink and followed him inside the camper. It felt small and cool after sitting under the stars and in front of the fire. It also smelled like Jake’s cologne, fresh and soapy-scented.

“Sorry about that.” He pulled the door tightly behind him. “Alice likes to play her music loudly, and if I go over there now, I might not be back for a while.”

“Oh, ok.” I didn’t know if I should slide into the booth or sit on the couch. I wanted to keep talking. I wanted to get him to open up.

He fiddled with one of the speakers before strolling to the couch and crossing his ankle over his knee. He had selected a country song, but I hadn’t heard it before.

“What’s this?” I nodded toward the speaker.

“You don’t know this song?” He looked shocked.

I shook my head. The words were haunting and perfectly placed. It was an acoustic number, and the man’s voice was smooth and raspy on all the right notes.

“How about Quinn Jansen? Do you know her?”

I laughed. “She’s only my favorite singer and songwriter. I love her.” Ever since I had seen the indie artist’s first video on YouTube, I was hooked. After it went viral, she was on every show. Every top list.

He smiled. “Well, she wrote this.”

“What? But it’s a guy song.” I wondered if he was teasing, but he looked too serious.

Jake stretched on the couch. I admired his athletic body. A quick flashback of his dripping wet chest reminded me how sculpted he was under that shirt.

“Quinn can write. I’d listen to just about anything of hers.”

The next song was a Quinn Jansen hit.

He smiled. “Speak of the devil.”

I giggled. “Yep. I do know this is her song.”

I sat on the end of the couch, keeping a pillow’s distance between us. It was hard to ignore how the closeness of the camper brought us into each other’s space. It was immediately more intimate.

All day I felt as if we had been gradually moving closer to this moment. Thrills of recklessness tingled under my skin. What did I really know about this guy?

He pointed over my head. “Hey, would you mind cutting off the light over the table? Not only is Alice loud, she’s nosey.”

“Sure.”

I reached behind me. I meant to flip the light closest to the table, but instead, I swiped all three, throwing the entire camper into darkness.

“Oh crap. Sorry. Sorry.” I fumbled with the wall, but couldn’t find the switch to save my life.

“Hey.” The tone of his voice was low and commanding. “Leave it.”

The way he sounded in the dark made me shiver and smile at the same time. God he was sexy.

He was moving closer. The attempt to steady my pulse was useless.

My heart beat faster, waiting for him to close in on me. But he took his time in the dark, setting his own speed for the chase. He knew exactly what he was doing. Strong hands slid around my waist and drew me toward him. He didn’t kiss me right away.

His cheek brushed against my face, and his lips grazed my ear. It was as if he wanted to inhale every part of me. The anticipation was dizzying. His body pressed close and I felt the heat from his mouth. He moved from my ear, to my neck, and skimmed my throat with his lips, raking me with his warm breath.

Oh shit. He was torturing me. It stirred the feelings of want I hadn’t been able to unleash all summer. Pent-up desire. Bottled lust. I leaned back, taking in every touch as he ignited blazes along my skin.

His hand clasped the back of my neck, wrapping his fingers through my hair before bringing my mouth to his. He tasted like the last sips of beer, and I couldn’t think of any better way to get drunk than on deep kisses like these. His tongue played with mine as he pinned me on the couch under him.

I wanted to think through what I was doing—making out with a virtual stranger at the campground—but thoughts seemed like a bad idea, an idea that wouldn’t do anything to ease the burning feeling taking over my core.

Everything throbbed and ached. I needed this. I needed him.

His hands slid under my shirt and worked their way up my back, pressing into my skin. I arched as his hands landed on my bra.

“Wait,” I whispered.

I pushed against Jake, creating enough space to pull the shirt over my head. I tossed it on the floor. He led the straps over my arms and dropped the lacy garment on the floor.

I could get lost in the kisses, the touches, the whispers in my ear.

I let out a deep moan as the heat of his mouth descended to my breast. He sucked hard, pulling my nipple with his teeth. I fisted my hands through his hair, knowing the pressure between my legs was building with each flick of his tongue.

“Oh God,” I whimpered.

He moved to the other side, and my breast throbbed from where his lips had been. He took me between his teeth, my nipple pebbling under his command. I heard a growl of satisfaction vibrate from him.

“Damn, you’re sexy,” he groaned.

He made a slow circle with his tongue. He blew across the wet skin, making my knees clench harder against his waist.

My panties were soaked. My clit throbbed. And my mind was blurred by everything my body wanted. What was he doing? All it would take was one flick of his fingers between my wet folds and I’d lose it. He’d see how desperate I was for this.

I’d fall off the cliff before we got to the good part. I was a live wire, waving in the wind. My breath was erratic. My center needy to feel how hard he was as my hips rocked into him.

I realized that the sudden abandon I felt by being with a total stranger was evaporating. This was all too intimate to experience with someone I didn’t know, and instantly, that seemed kind of important. We would be stocking shelves together in the morning. In our aprons, under my father’s watchful eye.

He’d think I had no restraint. That I was like every other girl on this island—no sexual experience in the world. God, this was embarrassing.

I bolted from the couch, knocking Jake back on his heels.

I broke the spell. I ruined the moment.

“Shit. Where’s my shirt?” I covered my breasts with one hand and searched the floor for my shirt with the other, my breath frantic. It had to be here somewhere. The camper wasn’t that big.

“Something wrong, darlin’? Are you ok?” Jake sounded calm. Of course, he wasn’t the one with only half his clothes on. “Hold on. I’ll help you.” He crawled to the floor. “Ah-ha. Here you go.”

I fumbled to find my clothes. I was glad we were in the dark so I wouldn’t have to see the look on his face while I struggled to redress.

“I need to get home. I didn’t realize how late it was. We have an early morning. Thanks for dinner. Really, it was great. And the music. And…” I had to get out of here.

“Chelsea, wait—”

But I didn’t give him a chance to explain or apologize. I bolted from the Silver Dollar and ran to my car. Today set an all-time record for embarrassments, and this night really needed to end. It was going to start over again tomorrow when I got to the store and had to train the man who had just made me almost come from nothing more than a hot kiss and some heavy petting.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

Ben

I slammed my hand on the phone and stopped its incessant chirping sounds. Damn, it was five in the morning. I rolled under the checked comforter, not ready to leave the warm cocoon. I liked to keep the camper icy cold at night, so when I got in bed I could wrap up in the covers. It might not be energy-efficient, but I slept best that way.

The crickets started up again, and I groaned as I stumbled out of bed and into the shower. I turned the nozzle to hot as the water sputtered to life. The night hadn’t gone exactly as I planned. The last thing I wanted to have happen was what did happen—Chelsea ran out of the Sand Dollar as if I had scorched her with a hot iron. She wasn’t that kind of girl. I should have known better. I cursed out loud, knowing I had taken things too far too fast with her.

I pressed my hands against the shower wall and lowered my head, letting the water wash over my shoulders. The heat between us had taken me by surprise. The lights went down and so did my restraint. In the dark, I was surrounded by the scent of her shampoo. Her lips were soft, drawing me in for more. Damn if the way she moaned didn’t turn me on. I had fought those sounds when I tossed and turned in the camper’s master suite last night.

I didn’t know if I could make it up to her, but I would try. I wasn’t here to upset her. It got out of control before I knew what was happening. I pounded the wall with my fist, not proud of what I had done on the couch. The water slowed to a trickle. My seven minutes were up. Time to get dressed and get to work.

***

I parked my Jeep in the side employee entrance. I noticed Chelsea’s bike was racked in the stand. I exhaled. Today was going to be interesting. There probably wouldn’t be any kayak races after work. I would keep it cool and give her space.

I sauntered through the doors and grabbed an apron from the hook. She had explained that we wouldn’t open the stand until mid-morning. My first duties of the morning would include sweeping and getting the coffee ready. I could use a tall cup. The shower wasn’t long enough to wake me up.

“Hey, good morning.” I pulled the strings against my back. Chelsea was at the register, counting bills.

“Hey.” She didn’t look up and continued to stack the money in rows.

“What can I help you with?” I looked around for the coffee pot—my first choice.

“Ten—twenty—thirty—uh, why don’t you grab a broom from the closet and start on the aisles?”

“Got it.” I spun on my heels to fetch the broom.

If sweeping was what she wanted, sweeping she would get. I picked it up and tossed it to my other hand. I walked to the corner of the store farthest from her. The walk-in coolers hummed as I made piles of dirt. I had made it through five aisles before she walked toward me.

“So, after you finish with the floors, do you think you could unload some of the boxes that came in? They are kind of heavy for me to move around. I’ll put the merchandise on display. You don’t have to do that part.” Her gaze was steady, almost robotic.

“Absolutely. Just point me to the boxes. I’m your man.” I wanted to kick myself. That was a stupid thing to say. I had vowed not to flirt.

She turned away. “Let me just go ahead and show you where they are. You can come back to this.”

I followed her to a storage room off the hallway where the aprons hung. I could barely walk two feet into the room, it was so stuffed with mannequins, fishnets, and boxes.

“Wow. There’s a lot going on in here.” I looked at the shelves near the ceiling. Every single one was loaded.

She retrieved a box cutter and marked the boxes she needed help with. “All of the ones I need on the retail side have an X on them. Ok?” She hurried past me. “Just move those when you’re done sweeping.” She was gone before I could respond.

I looked at the stack and decided to haul a few to the retail side before rejoining the broom. T-shirt boxes were a lot heavier than I expected. I huffed as I placed the boxes on the floor. Definitely need to get back in the gym. Maybe Chelsea could tell me if there was one of the island.

I approached the counter where she was scribbling something on a roll of register paper. I recognized that look on her face. I had seen it before.

“Did a song hit you?”

She gathered the paper in her fist. “I-I was—”

“Can I hear it?” I leaned on my elbow.

Her blue eyes sparkled. “You want to hear it? Really?” Her tone softened. It was the first time she had countered my gaze all morning.

“Writer to writer. Let me hear it.”

She set her mouth in a determined line as if she was mentally sorting the pros and cons of sharing the words with me.

“You don’t have to, if you don’t want. No pressure.” I backed off the counter a few inches.

“Ok. Yeah. Maybe you can help me. Writer to writer.” She smiled.

I liked that smile. It reminded me why I had taken the job in the first place—I was just trying to help a pretty girl. Nothing more than that.

She flattened the creases in the paper and held it up to read.

Holding you is like catching the wind

Breezing in and out of my arms

Before my heart can decide to let you in

You’re gone and maybe you’ll be back

But everything already feels lost and dark

She looked at me expectedly, her forehead creased with worry.

“Wow. You wrote that? How does the rest go? I want to hear the whole thing.”

She bit her lip. “That’s part of my problem. I get bursts of words, and then I can’t finish the songs.” Her shoulders slumped. “I’m here all the time. I don’t have time to write. I have fifty of these partially written songs. I can’t finish them.”

“But you have to finish that one. It-it needs to be finished.” There weren’t many words, but there were enough to make me want more. It was like getting half a kiss—it just wasn’t enough.

“So, you like it?” Her teeth sank into her lip again.

“I do. I really do.” I looked in her eyes to reassure her that there was something to what she had created, but the minute I did, I felt like I was the one who needed reassurance.

“I-I’m going to go finish up with the floors.”

“Ok.” She folded the paper in half and tucked it in her apron. “Thanks for listening.”

“Sure thing.” I walked to where I had left the broom, and realized I had never asked her about the gym. Damn it. Women were the worst distraction—especially girls with beautiful blue eyes.

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

Chelsea

I flicked the loop of my apron on the wooden peg. Five o’clock couldn’t get here fast enough. Although, the day hadn’t been nearly as awkward as I thought it was going to be. Jake was cool. He didn’t make me uncomfortable. Unlike Derek, he didn’t pressure me at every turn to go out with him again. He was a few years older than I was. Maybe it was a maturity thing, or maybe it was a Jake thing.

He should be closing down the rental stand by now. I pushed the screen door open, and watched as he locked the hatch on the booth.

“How did it go today?” I asked. The sun blared in my face. I held a hand up to shield my eyes.

“Easy. I rented a few snorkel sets, a kayak, and two fishing poles. I think I have the job of the summer.” He smiled, revealing his white teeth.

My cheeks heated as I remembered his mouth on certain parts of my body, and what those teeth had done.

“I’m glad you like it so much.”

I couldn’t understand why. Shouldn’t he be itching to write like I was? I walked with him to our vehicles. I thought about how things had unfolded between us last night. Everything had been fun and easy until I flipped and ran out of the camper. It took constant pep talks throughout the day not to dive into an explanation of what happened when I had pulled away from him. I wasn’t even sure I had it figured out. The kissing was undeniably amazing, his hands were incredible, but my brain battled with my body and won. It’s for the best, I thought. He might be gorgeous and have an affinity for perfect lyrics, but it could get complicated quickly.

He pulled open the door to his Jeep. “So, I guess we get to do this again tomorrow?”

“Yeah, it’s like Groundhog Day. A new day, but same old stuff.” I walked over to her bike. “Shit.”

“What’s wrong?” He closed the door behind him and joined me.

My front tire was flat. Flat as a freakin’ pancake. If I tried to ride home, I would bend and mangle the rim. That beach cruiser had cost two hundred dollars; it would be expensive to repair a tire and a rim.

“Looks like I have a flat.” I bent down to examine the tire, trying to locate where the hole was. If there was only one, I could have it patched.

“All right. No problem.” Jake reached behind me and lifted the bike into the air.

“What are you doing?” I watched as he carried the bike to the open frame of his Jeep.

“I’m giving you a ride. Hop in.” He had gently placed the cruiser in the backseat and was now climbing in his side of the car.

I walked to the passenger door and slid into the seat. He cranked the Jeep and country music blasted through the speakers.

“You sure do like country music.” I thought about the music we listened to last night at the campground.

“Yeah, well I’m from Texas.” He slid his sunglasses over his eyes.

“I thought you were from Georgia, but Texas makes a lot more sense.” I didn’t think cowboy steaks were a Georgia thing. “Why the Georgia plates?”

He threw the Jeep into reverse and positioned us in front of the road. “I don’t know where you live. Which way?” He motioned to the road. One side would take us toward the campground and ferry docks, and the other around the cove, where my apartment was.

“Go right. I’m all the way around the cove. At the very end.”

“Nice. I haven’t seen this part of the island.” He peeled out of the parking lot, kicking up gravel with the tires.

A flock of seagulls split their V-formation as he steered around the circular cove that was the main attraction of the village.

“Take another right here and then left at the mailbox.” I pointed at my road. It was off the main path, and only the locals knew where this house was.

“This is where you live?” he eyed the two-story beach house with a wraparound porch.

“Yeah, but only one fourth of it is mine. It’s an amazing house. It was divided into apartments awhile back. I would love to see it as a whole house. It would be incredible.” I stepped out of the Jeep and nervously fidgeted with my keys.

“Which one is yours?” He retrieved the bike from the backseat and placed it on the driveway. He wheeled it on the back tire to keep from damaging the front rim.

I showed him where the bike rack was. I didn’t want to deal with the tire right now. I could take my car to work in the morning. “I have the corner one. A view of the ocean and the cove. If I only get part of it, at least I have the best part.”

“No kidding.” He was already ahead of me jogging up the stairs and canvassing the porch. “Nice hammock.”

“Thanks. I do a lot of writing out here.”

I remembered the few notes I had scribbled early this morning. I bit my lip, wondering if this idea would work. Jake leaned against the railing and faced the boats in the marina. He was an easy-going guy, pleasant, full of smiles, flirty as hell, but that look—I recognized that look. He was searching for something, and it wasn’t in the marina. Why hadn’t I noticed that look before?

I cleared my throat. “Would you want to help me finish the song from this morning?”

He turned from the railing. “Ah, I’m not a songwriter, sweetheart. I don’t know how I can help you.”

“But, you’re a writer. Maybe if I can talk through it with you, I’ll find the right words. Would you try it?” I had never asked anyone to help me write before, but maybe I needed some creative brainstorming to get things going.

“Sure. I’ll give it a shot. But, I’m not making any promises.” He smiled.

“Really? You’ll do it? Ok, wait right here. I’ll get my guitar.” I rushed past him to go in through the sliding door.

“You wouldn’t have any beer in there, would you?” he called after me.

I wrinkled my nose. “No, but I have wine.”

“Wine will work.” He turned back to the harbor and I walked inside, giving him a chance to look for whatever he thought he was missing.

***

I sputtered wine onto the front of my guitar. “You can’t be serious. You think ‘bunk’ is the way to go?” I giggled. “Ok, so you want me to sing: Your kisses make me feel drunk, when we’re together we should bunk?”

“Pure poetry, baby.” Jake sipped on the wine.

“Name one song that has the word ‘bunk’ in it.” I giggled again, watching him count up pretend songs on his fingers.

“At least five that I can count.”

“You’re a liar. There are no songs with ‘bunk’ as a lyric.” I leaned down to rest my guitar against the balcony railing.

It had to be close to eight o’clock. We had finished a bottle of wine and one song, but neglected to eat. My head was spinning, and I knew I needed food fast.

“I’m going to make some pasta. Want some?” I caught myself on the edge of the hammock. I had tipped a little too far forward.

“Whoa, killer. Hold on.” He steadied me. “You ok?”

Embarrassed, I smiled. “Yes. What’s the vote on food? I need some. Sorry, I don’t have raw meat to throw on the fire.”

“You liked that dinner. Don’t deny it.” His hand had moved from my arm to the small of my back. His eyes dipped to the base of my throat. I wondered if he was thinking about last night. Suddenly, I was.

“I— Yeah, I did.”

His eyes locked on mine, and I struggled to remember which direction to turn for the kitchen. I looked at his full lips, and the chiseled line of his jaw. If I stared long enough, maybe the porch wouldn’t spin as much or maybe he would kiss me again. I was hoping for the kiss.

“Can I help you?” He stepped away, but kept his palm firmly planted on my back. I wanted him to lean in again.

“Yes, pasta and we might need some more wine.”

I didn’t care if I had already passed my two-glass limit for work nights. We were having fun, and the words really did flow when he was around.

“Show me the way.” Jake turned me toward the door, and I led him inside the apartment.

I pulled a bottle from the wine rack and handed it to him. “Here you go. I’ll let you wrestle with the cork while I start the pasta.”

I filled a pot with water and lit the match on the gas stove. We worked seamlessly together in the kitchen. He poured us each a full glass of wine and chopped a cucumber for the salad. Usually, I did the bare minimum for dinner, but now that I had a guest, I decided to take my cooking up a notch. I crumbled bacon into a frying pan, and started a cream sauce in another pot. This had reached a whole new level of entertaining.

After we had devoured two servings and finished the wine, Jake took the plates to the sink and grabbed the bottle. He returned to the deck, where I had picked up the guitar. I settled on the wicker loveseat that faced the ocean. The salt air helped clear my head. I felt a little less tipsy.

“I just had an idea,” I announced.

“Ok, hit me. What is it?” He looked interested.

“I reworded the entire verse. There’s no ‘bunk’ in this version,” I teased. “Instead, it should go something like...” I strummed a few notes. “I can’t stop getting drunk on your kisses, so don’t hand me tears, I want this. Don’t try to resist.”

I looked up at Jake.

“You wrote that just now?” he asked.

I nodded. He was like a muse. I didn’t know those existed until now.

“Damn, girl.”

He placed the wine bottle on the deck and reached forward. I didn’t know what he was doing, but the guitar slipped from my grasp as he pulled it away and laid it down. From the porch, I could always hear the waves on the beach and the boats rocking in their slips, but right now, all sounds were muffled as he leaned toward me, pressing his mouth against mine.

I clutched at his shoulders and brought him close, tasting the wine on his tongue. He was making me drunk, and every part of me told me to stop resisting and enjoy the way he made me feel.

It didn’t take long to realize he wasn’t going to fit on the loveseat. He was half-kneeling on the deck. I nudged my way to the side, and without saying anything, reached for his hand and led him into the apartment. It seemed too bright after the darkness of the deck. I flipped the lights off.

Jake grabbed me from behind, and pushed my hair to the side, kissing my neck. I spun in his arms, searching for his mouth. I needed those lips. They were beyond kissable.

He grabbed me by the waist and lifted me against him. I wrapped my legs around him, squeezing hard. I didn’t know if it was because he didn’t know his way around the apartment, or because it was almost completely dark, but he moved two paces to the kitchen table and placed me on the edge before tearing at the buttons on my shirt.

They hit the table and scattered on the floor one by one. The edge of his T-shirt was soft in my palms as I slid it upward, taking my time to trace the hard bulges of the muscles wrapping his torso. His eyes no longer looked lost. They were full of lust and longing. Longing for me. I dug into his firm backside with my heels, pushing him forward. Why were we still mostly dressed?

I eased back on my arms, giving him a full view of what I knew he wanted. I felt the fire of his breath on my navel as I unwound my legs, allowing him to move on his own. He skimmed my stomach with his fingers, taking his time until he had my breast in his hand.

“Yes,” I moaned and arched against the wood of the table. I wasn’t sure what I was yessing, but I liked that he was touching me and he wasn’t being gentle. He was taking what he wanted. Like I was.

His broad shoulders loomed over me as he pushed the fabric covering my nipples out of the way and seized me with his mouth. I writhed under the torture. It was hot and sent a rush straight to the sensitive spot between my legs.

I reached around his hips and found the button to his shorts. Pressed against him like this, I could tell he was just as turned on as I was. I slipped a hand along his stomach and reached below his waist.

“Fuck” he moaned, biting harder on my nipple.

I whimpered with a hard shudder.

And just like that he stopped. He stepped away from the table and turned his back.

My shirt lay ripped open. My breasts wet from his mouth. My chest heaved from hotness I had never known. Everything in me was aching for more. It hurt. My body hurt.

“Why-why did you stop?” I whispered.

His forehead was pressed against the wall. Flashes of moonlight rippled across his back.

He sighed. “Damn it. I promised myself I wasn’t going to do that to you again.”

Now I was totally confused. Since when did guys stop in the middle of a hot hookup? It was like the Derek fiasco all over again, but so much worse.

“But I want you to.” I tried to close the shirt without buttons. It wasn’t that easy.

He turned toward me. “Yeah, I liked it too.” He kissed the top of my forehead, a gesture I didn’t know whether to interpret as sweet or condescending.

“So, what’s the problem?” It was meant to be a rhetorical question.

I could list all the possible issues of two people having crazy, off the charts sex after knowing each other for only two days, but I didn’t really want to hear it after a bottle and a half of wine.

“Darlin’, we need to slow this down. You are sexy and beautiful, don’t misunderstand.”

I refrained from pouting, but really that’s all I wanted to do. I was completely worked up. Each nerve in my body was on fire and ached. There was no doubt what I wanted from him. If he would only let me, I could show him it would be ok.

“Ok, so explain some more,” I prodded.

I decided to let go of the grip on the shirt. The fabric fell to the sides, he sighed as my breasts heaved against the exposure. It wasn’t fair to do to him, but my body was working in survival mode. It needed him.

“My life is complicated right now. It’s not a great idea to start jumping into bed with pretty girls. Ok?”

Pretty girls? The way he said it made me wonder how many others there were. Was there a waiting list? Of course he was gorgeous and no doubt could flirt his way into any woman’s bed, but I didn’t want doubts to start fogging my mind. We had something real. I could feel it.

I hopped off the table, closing the distance between us.

“That’s not an explanation.” I pointed my index finger into his massive chest.

“You’re right. It’s not.”

“You kissed me. You keep kissing me.”

His eyes narrowed. “And that’s all I can think about, along with a few other things.” He paused. “But I’m not staying on Brees.”

I shook my head in defense. “I’m leaving too. You know that.”

He chuckled. “It’s not the same. I wish I could explain it.”

“Try me.”

“Chelsea, you—you’re unexpected. I never thought about something happening on Brees. I swear, I came here to be alone, but I’d be a lying bastard if I tried to tell you I don’t want to take you to your bed right now.”

My stomach flipped, praying he would follow through with it. Why did he make me feel this way? As if I couldn’t continue breathing without his hands on me?

He exhaled. “It wouldn’t be fair to you. Ok? And for once I’m trying to do the right thing. Can you believe that much? I’m trying to be fucking fair to you and I think this is how I’m supposed to do it.”

“I’m not going to get hurt, Jake. I know what this is.”

I studied his eyes. They smoldered with sexiness.

“Do you?”

I nodded. “Yes. It’s summer.”

“Summer? You want to label it summer?” He sighed. “I don’t think it’s fucking summer. Because I’m having a hard time taking advantage of you. I’m fighting every instinct in my body to strip you down and do everything dirty that pops in my head. But you’re not that kind of girl. You deserve better than someone like me showing up and wrecking your life. I don’t care what season it is.”

I shook my head. “You’re not wrecking anything.” I placed my hand on his forearm, unable to deny the spark that tingled under my fingers. “What did the last girl do to you?” I whispered.

It had been there, I just hadn’t wanted to see it. I didn’t want to imagine him with someone else. Holding someone. Kissing someone. He was hurt. Scared. Someone had broken his trust. Damaged his soul. God, who was the evil creature who hurt him?

He hid it behind his cocky smile. His confident charm. But I saw it—he was broken.

He shook his head. “It wasn’t like that.”

I raised my eyebrows. “I don’t believe you.”

He chuckled. “Are you trying to add mind reader to lyrical genius as your list of skills?”

“You’re not going to distract me with flirting. Even if I like the flirting.” I smiled. “You’re not going to hurt me, Jake. And I’m not going to hurt you.”

“Trust me.” His voice deepened. “I’m saving you.”

Damn it, he was stubborn.

“Ok,” I whispered, taking a step closer. I trusted his words, but I also heard what his body had said. He wanted me.

“What about kissing? Is this ok?” I asked, tracing the side of his face, pulling him to my lips, the sides of my shirt open as I pressed into his chest, making sure he felt my nipples graze against him. He exhaled.

“Damn it,” he groaned.

I brushed my hard tits along the ridges of his ribs. “Everything but sex?” My eyes lit to his.

His lips crushed mine. The kiss was fast and hard. His tongue moved deeper in my mouth. He slid one hand along my back and the other roamed, palming my breast. I knew he wouldn’t be able to stay away. I moaned lightly as he twisted my nipple between his fingers. My mouth parting, sucking, and eager for him.

I nipped at his lips. Within seconds Jake knelt in front of me, dragging my shorts to the floor with him.

He breathed over my heat, sliding my matching lace panties over my thighs and off my ankles. I grabbed the back of his head as his tongue darted between my folds with feverish thirst.

“Oh God,” I moaned, rocking into him, pressing my center into him without shame.

“No sex,” he ordered.

I nodded. “Ok, just don’t stop,” I begged, my hands urging more from his tongue.

His eyes were locked on mine as he lapped at my juices, circling my clit before diving into my aching pussy with urgent strokes. He was hungry for me. And I craved every second of it.

I couldn’t hold off like this. I was going to come in epic proportions. My core tightened before the anchor broke and the waves of pleasure spilled through me.

I cried out as Jake’s tongue plunged inside me. My body convulsed with the orgasm as I tried to regain control.

“Fuck,” he growled, looking up at me. He kissed the inside of my thigh as I started to breathe normally again. “You taste like pure sugar.”

I sank to the floor, collapsing into his arms. I wrapped my hands around his neck.

“I could watch you come all night.” He grinned wickedly with promise.

“But I… what about y—””

He dropped me to the floor with a gentle thud, canvassing my body with his hands until he was between my legs again.

“Oh God,” I whimpered as his fingers pushed inside me while his tongue flicked over my clit.

“I think that’s exactly what I’m going to do, darlin’.” He drew a long slow lick between my folds. “Come for me.” His eyes sparkled and I lost all control. My second orgasm dripping with a new intensity. “You’ve given me an entirely new mission, darlin’.”

He managed to keep all his attention on me, and every time I tried to reciprocate he pinned my wrists over my head, teasing and torturing me with more pleasure. If he thought this made me want to have sex less, he was insane. I wanted it more than ever.

The dread hit me when I heard the crickets on my alarm chirp. How much time had passed? Had we been on the floor all night?

“Shit,” I murmured. My lips were swollen, and my legs unsteady from coming so hard. But I didn’t want to move. I didn’t want to stop kissing him.

A few seconds later, a second chorus of crickets started. “You too?” I looked at him.

“Yep. Crickets.” He braced himself against the floor and played with my hair.

“So, we found a way not to have sex all night long.” I giggled and traced his chest.

He kissed me again on the mouth. “Looks like we did.” He closed his eyes. “What would my boss think if I called in sick today?”

I laughed. “Uh-uh. No way. You kept me up just as much.”

“Hey, would you mind if I jumped in the shower before work? Won’t be longer than seven minutes. I swear.”

I smiled. “Yeah, sure. It’s right through there.” I motioned to the bedroom. We hadn’t made it past the kitchen wall last night.

I wasn’t complaining.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

Ben

I placed beer bottles into the racks inside the walk-in fridge. It was forty-five degrees in the freezer, and since I didn’t get a cold shower this morning, this was doing the trick. I needed to be cooled to the bone.

If I looked through the rows of brown bottles, I could see Chelsea at the register ringing up one of the beach customers. She was smiling at a mother and her three children loaded with plastic buckets and sandcastle molds. It looked like the kids were squabbling over who got to carry the shovels versus the sand pails.

Last night was a first, an absolute first. A flat tire turned into something I couldn’t describe. The wine on her lips, the music floating off her tongue, took hold of me like I was a man gone crazy.

I was going on three weeks at the campground. Maybe I couldn’t handle lonely like I thought I could. I tried to remember the last time I had spent the night with a woman and only made out with her. It was probably high school. I closed my eyes, and for a second, I felt her skin under my hands, warm and soft.

“Son?” I jolted upright at the sound of a man’s voice.

“Yes, sir?” I stacked empty boxes on the dolly. There were at least half a dozen more to unpack.

“My daughter tells me you’re the new hire. Welcome to Davis.” I recognized the white-haired man Chelsea’s father, the owner. I stepped into the cooler to shake his hand.

“Yes, I am. This is my third day.” I wondered why I hadn’t seen him before now. “You have a great business here. Thanks for having me on.”

“I’m real surprised Chelsea was able to find someone so quickly. Where are you from?”

I had been careful to dodge as many questions as I could, but I knew the more I immersed myself in Brees Island life, the more likely it was that people were going to keep asking normal get-to-know-you questions.

“Originally from Texas, sir, but most recently I’ve been living in Atlanta.”

“Is that right? I’ve always wanted to take a trip to Texas. Been to Atlanta before. What part?”

“East Texas, a small town called Shiner. Funny, Brees Island reminds me of home a lot.”

“How so?” Mr. Davis opened one of the cardboard boxes and started passing me a few of the beer bottles for the next section.

I grabbed a handful to stock. “It has the same kind of small town feel. Everyone is friendly like back home.”

Regardless of how standoffish I had been, the hospitality of the island wasn’t lost on me. Flo and Carl had been nothing but kind to me despite my two-week beer binge. Every one of those beers had been filled with a memory or a regret I needed to put behind me. They were necessary, but I felt like I had visited all my disappointments—some a few times too many.

“Nice to know you like the island. There are a lot of good people here.” He smashed an empty box. “How long you thinking about staying?”

“I have a place at the campground through the end of the summer. I haven’t thought much past that to be honest, sir.” I stopped the stacking process to look at him.

“You know, we need to have you over for dinner.”

“Oh, I couldn’t impose like that.”

“No imposition. My wife loves to entertain. I’m sure we could convince Chelsea to join us for supper. How about tomorrow night?” He smiled.

I knew when I had been cornered. “Sure. Sounds good. I appreciate that.”

Mr. Davis turned. “We’ll see you at seven. And again, welcome aboard.” He saluted me and exited the cooler.

The man I spoke to didn’t resemble the angry man I had witnessed the other morning on the docks. He seemed friendly and warm like all the other residents of Brees Island. It made me wonder why Chelsea disliked him so much. Then I thought of the unspoken rift I had with my father, and knew the layers in a family went much deeper than what anyone could see from the outside.

Families were like glaciers, bound together from an original formation, but each family member carrying unique layers. Those layers were deep and formed from the same storm, but even though one layer might melt for one person, it didn’t mean it melted for everyone or anyone else. The melting and healing was all up to you—how quickly you could face the sun and let it all go. I decided I wasn’t here long enough to get involved in the Davis’s family issues. By the end of the summer, I would be on my way somewhere else. I couldn’t stay on Brees Island forever.

I finished unloading the beer and sauntered over to the register. I had the afternoon shift at the rental booth, but I couldn’t pass by without snagging one smile from Chelsea. I had, after all, gotten lost in those lips all night.

“Hey.” I strolled to the counter. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail.

She jumped and dropped a stack of magazines in her arms. “Shit.”

“Sorry, hold on.” I hopped across the counter like it was the General Lee and I was one of the Luke boys. I dropped to the floor and shuffled the magazines in my arms.

“I’m a klutz today.” She began collecting the dropped magazines in a pile. “Look at this garbage. Why do people even read this stuff anyway? I don’t get it.” She held up a cover of Celeb Watch.

My throat tightened and I felt the familiar stabbing sensation under my lungs. Holy fuck. It was Becs.

“I mean, really, do we care who Rebecca Campbell is dating? Personally, I’ve never seen any of her movies but I don’t care. It seems like there are more pressing issues going on in the world than her love life.” She rolled her eyes and continued to retrieve the pile she had jumbled.

I knew the magazines were at the front counter. There was a line of them that came up to my knees, but I also knew not to look that low. I didn’t want to see. I didn’t want to know what was going on with my old Hollywood friends, especially Rebecca. Now those magazines I had been so careful to avoid were scattered at my feet.

“Jake? Are you ok? It’s not a big deal. I know you didn’t mean for me to drop them.”

I held the glossy photo in my hands. Rebecca had made the cover for the umpteenth time. Who could count that high? Her hair was blond again.

Hollywood Heartache

Campbell says she’ll do what it takes to get Baldwin back

Under the picture was a broken heart with my face split down the middle. I blinked. Rebecca had done an interview with the magazine. I flipped open to page twenty-two.

“I want Ben to know how much I love him. He has every right to be mad at me. I know what I did, but everyone deserves forgiveness. I know I broke his heart, and I’m going to spend every day making it up to him and showing him that I would give him my last breath.”

I choked on my next inhale. She was insane. What in the hell was she talking about? We were done. Settled. And we were never in love. Son of a bitch.

“Jake? Seriously, you look like you saw a ghost.” Chelsea reached over and rested her palm on my wrist.

“Can I take a break?” I knew my voice was sharp, but I had to deal with this situation.

“Sure. I guess so.” Her mouth formed a frown.

“Ten minutes. I’ll be back to take over for Bertie in the rental stand.” I stood and shoved a rolled copy of the magazine in the band of my shorts behind the apron tie.

“Doing a little reading?” She teased.

“I’ll be back.” I turned on my heels and headed for the screen door. I kept my phone in the glove box of the Jeep. There wasn’t any reason to have it on me at work. I turned the lock on the compartment and pulled the phone out. I had Rick’s number up in two seconds.

He answered after the first ring. “Hey, man. Good to hear from you. How you feeling?” Rick sounded happy.

“Good,” I huffed. “No, not good. Rebecca did some kind of expose article on us for Celeb Watch. I need to know what her angle is.”

“Celeb Watch? That rag’s a piece of shit. No one reads it, Ben.”

“Yeah, well I read it. She granted them an interview, and it wasn’t because she’s in love with me.”

“Maybe she is. She wouldn’t be the first, brother.” He chuckled on the other end.

“Rick. Just find out. I need to know why she’s talking about us. Leave me a message if I don’t answer, ok?” I nodded at a fisherman walking in the store.

“Got it, boss. I’m on it,” he reported.

“Thanks.”

“It’s good to know you still need me for something.”

“Rick, you’re the best out there. Of course I still need your help.”

I realized that my new career decisions would affect Rick and everyone else on my team. They were still on my payroll, and I wouldn’t cut them loose until they found other jobs. Their families depended on those salaries—on the income my name and fame brought to them.

“Thanks again,” I added.

“Sure thing.”

I tossed the phone into the glove box and twisted the lock. I glanced around the parking lot before pulling the magazine out of my waistband. I leaned against the tail of the Jeep, opened the magazine, and picked up where I left off on the biggest web of lies I had ever read.

CHAPTER TWENTY

Chelsea

It was Thursday. My day off. I pushed off on the deck and drifted across the porch in my hammock. The problem was that on my one day off I couldn’t focus on the one thing I waited six days to do—write songs. Instead, my stomach was in knots thinking about dinner tonight with Jake and my parents.

The dinner invitation reeked of my father’s manipulation. I had probably smiled a little too brightly when I described Jake to him. He was using that to get me to the house.

Jake acted so weirdly at work yesterday that we didn’t make plans to get together last night. But we weren’t at that stage, yet. We weren’t at any stage. I sighed. Two make out sessions did not equal a stage status. I couldn’t very well let him go to dinner at my parents’ house alone. That would be the opposite of showing my southern hospitality. And let’s face it, I wanted to see him again.

It didn’t seem to matter that he was leaving at the end of the summer. I was too. It didn’t matter that he was a practical stranger that appeared on the docks out of nowhere. It made him mysterious. Mysterious and hot.

The other night in my kitchen I could tell he was holding back with me. There was a bad boy in there somewhere, and I was ready to know more about him. As soon as he was about to take me to the brink of something naughty and dangerous, he would pull back, leaving me breathless and wanting more.

I stepped from the hammock with my guitar and today’s lyrics. With an hour before dinner, it was time to start bracing myself for a meal at my parents’ house.

***

Most people would use their day off to fix their broken bike or run other normal people errands, but I readily accepted I wasn’t most people as I pulled up behind Jake’s Jeep.

I looked down at my sundress with the deep V neckline and embroidered sailboats. It was an attempt to catch Jake’s eye. I hoped it would. There were a few ways I could rescue him tonight from the family gathering.

“Hi, Mom.” I pecked her on the cheek, and inhaled the smell of Old Bay and shrimp. “We’re having shrimp tonight?”

“Why, don’t you look cute? Spin around in that for me.”

I obliged.

“Where is— Where are the guys?” They weren’t in the kitchen or the adjoining sitting room. My parents lived on the cove, but their cottage was on the opposite side of the semicircle than mine. They only had a view of the marina near their house, but it was one you could take in from almost every room in the house.

“Your dad already has that boy in the study. He’s showing off.”

“Mom, he’s not a boy.” I hadn’t asked him yet how old he was, but he definitely wasn’t a boy.

“You know what I mean. Jake, the new clerk at the store. They are looking at photos and heaven knows what else.” I watched as my mother dumped the pot of shrimp into a colander. “He’s got a captive audience, so they could be in there for hours.”

“Do you mind if I join them, or do you need me here?” I knew she had the kitchen under control, but I didn’t want to leave her without the customary offer.

“Go, go, go.” She sprinkled an extra dash of the red seasoning on the shrimp. “Hey, he’s cute,” she whispered behind me as I darted down the hall in search of Jake.

Something was up. I just couldn’t put my finger on it. The dinner, my mom’s comment—it made me uneasy, but I knew my guard was up the minute I stepped under the same roof as my father. Maybe it was my mistrust in him that made me feel this way.

I stopped in front of the hallway mirror for one last touchup. The freckles on my nose were mostly covered with makeup, but I grimaced at them. You couldn’t avoid some things no matter how much sunscreen you wore.

“Hey.” I rounded the corner to the study. They were standing in the center of the room. My dad pointed out a row of black-and-white framed pictures to Jake.

“There she is.” My father moved across the room to hug me, but I dodged the advance.

“Hi, Dad.”

He cleared his throat. “I was just telling Jake about when your grandfather decided to open the store.”

Jake smiled, the corners of his eyes crinkled with warmth. “Yep, I’m getting your entire family history.”

“Oh great. He hasn’t gotten out my baby album, has he?” I checked to see if it was still in place on the bookshelf.

“No, but I put in a request for that after dessert.” He laughed.

“My mom will be thrilled.” I realized that once Jake started talking, I didn’t even notice my father was in the room anymore. It all faded away. It was that smile; everything was in his smile.

“Why don’t I go check on your mother and let you two talk?” Apparently, my dad was still there.

I turned to face him.

“And I’ll take drink orders. Jake, what can I get you? Beer? Gin and tonic?”

“Beer sounds good, sir.” He slid his hands in his pockets. I liked the blue shirt he was wearing with the khaki shorts. He looked relaxed.

“Ok, and sweetie, I know you’d like a glass of wine. I’ll be back.” He walked out of the study.

I bit my tongue. My dad was using this setting to act like things were the same as two months ago. I couldn’t correct him in front of Jake. For now, I would act like a daughter who wanted to have dinner with her parents.

“Your parents are great. I met your mother earlier.”

“Yeah, she’s the best.” I knew my father would waltz back in any second, but I was fighting a growing urge to reach up and kiss Jake. Not seeing him for twenty-four hours had that effect on me.

“You look nice.” His eyes dipped to my throat and trailed along the V of my dress.

It was a heated stare my reveled in.

“Ok. Ok. Here we go.” Dad appeared with drinks in hand. “One beer for you, Jake. And here you go.” He handed me a glass of wine.

“Thank you, sir.” Jake tipped the glass against his lips. My parents were really going all out. The beer was in a pilsner glass.

“Mom says dinner is ready, so why don’t we head to the dining room?” My dad waved his hand toward the door.

“Dining room?” I looked at him. We only ate in the dining room at Christmas and Easter. Sometimes, if all of my aunts and grandparents were over, but it was rare that both sides of the family gathered at the same time.

“Come on. Let’s go.” He put his hand across Jake’s shoulder. “Wait ‘til you taste this sauce Cindy makes. It’s an island legend.”

I rolled my eyes. I was behind them so no one could catch this one. At least I got one freebie.

***

“Mom, that was so good. Thanks for making dinner. You sit and I’ll take care of the dishes.” I placed my napkin on the table and pushed back my seat.

“Yes, Mrs. Davis. It was delicious. You should bottle and sell that sauce at the store.” Jake smiled.

My mother blushed. “I’m just glad everyone enjoyed it. Chelsea, you don’t have to do the dishes.”

“Yes, I do. You sit and relax.” I began collecting plates.

“I’ll help.” Jake stood before I reached his plate.

“Why, a man that helps in the kitchen. That’s nice to see on the island. Isn’t it, Chelsea?” My mom beamed at me as Jake piled Dad’s plate on top of the stack.

“Mom, that is so sexist.” I knew it was true, though. It was rare to find a man on the island who helped with domestic duties. Add that to the list of reasons to find love off this piece of sand.

“I didn’t mean it that way.” She giggled. Her cheeks flushed from a glass of wine. “I’d have to pay your father to wash a dish.”

“Who wants to do dishes?” He chuckled from the head of the table. I fought the impulse to fire back. It was pointless.

Jake followed me to the kitchen and began rinsing the plates.

“My dad is such an asshole,” I seethed.

“He doesn’t seem that bad. But I don’t know what’s going on.” He tilted his head. “There’re always two sides to every story, right?”

I didn’t want to tell him that the other side of this story was dark and ugly. My father’s affair with Eileen was something that had permeated the happiness I once felt in our family home. It hung in the air like mold, growing darker and more disgusting the longer it was left on its own.

“Right.” I opened the dishwasher and tossed the silverware in the basket.

“You seem awfully quiet.” He nudged me with his arm.

“I can’t really talk about it right now.” The salt in my tears stung the corners of my eyes. I wasn’t going to cry. I couldn’t. “Is that ok?”

Jake turned the water off. “Hey, come here.”

Before I could turn my face from him or reach for another handful of dirty dishes, his strong arms wrapped me in against his chest.

I exhaled into the broad surface of his upper body. He smelled so good—like clean soap and cologne. I circled my hands around his waist and settled into the embrace. I felt the anger that had gripped me release with every deep breath I shared with him.

“Is that better?” he murmured into my hair.

I looked in his eyes, feeling calmness wash over me. It was as if Jake had steadied all the tipsiness, and with a new sense of balance, I lost my breath.

“Yes,” I whispered.

It was only a hug, but suddenly it felt like the single most earth-shattering moment of my life.

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

Ben

“Rick, come on. Tell me something. What is going on with her?” I closed the door of the Sand Dollar behind me and turned the AC to low. Today was a scorcher.

“Rebecca’s determined. She says she’s in love.”

“What in the hell? We weren’t even together that long.” I ran my hands through my hair.

“I talked to her for a few minutes yesterday. She swears the article is her way of getting you back. She really wants you to work things out.” He paused. “It sounds legit, Ben.”

I slid into the vinyl booth with a cup of coffee. “It can’t be. I was there. I was in the relationship. We never once said we loved each other. This is so full of bullshit. She has an angle. I know she does.”

“You can’t tell anyone that. Rebecca is sweet and beautiful. She’s really playing up the girl-in-love card. And it’s working. She’s had one interview after another.” Rick breathed hard into the phone. “Have you thought about doing a counter interview? You should put your side of the story out there.”

“Hell no.” The coffee burned the tip of my tongue. “I’m not responding. No statements, no interviews, no spin. Do you hear me, Rick? I just want to know what she’s up to. I’m not turning this into a bigger media circus.”

I didn’t know about the other interviews Rebecca had granted, although it wasn’t surprising. She loved the attention. I remembered how she never turned down a fan request for an autograph or a picture. She was in her natural state when a camera was present.

“I’ll keep making some calls,” he announced.

“Thanks, Rick.”

“Sure thing. I’ll get back to you as soon as I find out.”

“All right.” I attempted another sip of the coffee.

“But if you change your mind, just say the word, boss, and I’ll have Entertainment Now, the Gossip Channel, anyone you want ready to air your side of the story. We can work this in your favor. I know it.”

“There is no my side of the story. Just find out how to end this shit.” The longer this carried on, the more sympathy Becs was stockpiling.

“Got it. Hey, how is it, where you are?” Rick hadn’t asked my whereabouts in the last few phone calls.

I realized that he wanted that one piece of information above everything else. “It’s beautiful, man. I’ll catch you later.”

I didn’t give him another chance to pester me. I ended the call and placed the phone on the table.

I had worked five straight days at the store, and now I had two off in a row. It felt strange to sit in the camper with nothing to do. The waves were breaking hard and the wind was blowing.

I stepped out onto my sandy patch of yard and took in the scene. I had to shield my eyes from the sun. Man, it was bright and hot even with the breeze.

“Hey, stranger.” I heard Alice before I saw her.

“Hey, Alice.” I smiled and raised my coffee cup to her.

The pink bikini wasn’t as wild as some I had seen her in.

“You’ve been a busy guy this week, haven’t you?” Her arms were loaded with a beach chair, bag, and towel.

“Yeah, I took a job at the general store in town. This is my first day off.” I took a sip of the coffee and peered at the surfers taking the waves head on.

“Day off? I bet you could use some sun. Some time on the beach, huh?” She ran her tongue over her red lipstick.

One of the surfers took a nosedive in the center of a wave. I watched him pop back up with a smile on his face. “Actually, I’m going to do some surfing today.”

“Surfing?” She sounded shocked. “Oh, I bet you look all hard and chiseled in a wet suit.”

I swallowed the coffee and fought the urge to laugh. It was all so comical how blatantly she threw herself at me. “I don’t know about that, but I thought I’d give it a try. It’s been awhile.”

I wasn’t going to tell her the last time I surfed was for my role as a spy who arrived on an island by surfboard. I would keep that tidbit to myself.

“You have a good time, and if you come down to this part of the beach I’ll wave.”

“All right, Alice. Thanks.” I watched her sashay toward the row of sunbathers camped out on the beach for the day.

Sure, it was a spur of the moment excuse, but I was pretty stoked that I had come up with it. It was the perfect day to hit the waves.

***

“Welcome to Wave On, how can we help you?” The girl behind the counter couldn’t be more than sixteen. Exactly the demographic I needed to stay away from.

I was feeling more comfortable about my residence on Brees Island. But after Rebecca’s article two days ago, some of that contentment I had built as Jake the writer was gone.

I pulled my hat over my eyes and focused on my feet. “I wanted to get a refresher on surfing. I’ve done it before, but it’s been a few years. Is there someone who could give me a quick rundown on the breaks and waves, and then I’ll take it from there?”

She was staring, definitely staring long and hard. I was going to be pissed at myself if I blew everything because a fifteen-year-old identified me.

“That sounds like something we could totally do. You should go out with Derek. I think he’s free. He knows like everything.” She turned and opened a door behind her. “Derek!”

“Yep. I’m here. What’s up?” I recognized Derek as the clerk from Davis General Store. The clerk who had created a job opening for me.

“This guy needs a lesson or like kind of a lesson. Like maybe you could just take him out.” She started re-braiding her hair. I was no longer worried she knew who I was. She might be the one teenager who couldn’t pick out One Direction from a lineup.

“Hey, I’m Derek.” He stood by the counter.

“Jake.” I shook his hand. “We kind of met at Davis. You used to work there?”

“Five years I did. But this is a better situation.” He wiped dark bangs off his forehead. “Surfing is better than stocking shelves and sweeping floors.”

“All right.” I didn’t need all the background. I was just making conversation. “Do you think you could take me out? I’ve surfed before, but I’m rusty. It was a few years ago. Just fill me in on the best spots. I’ll be good from there.”

“Oh yeah, man. Let’s go.” Derek led me over to the rack of surfboards. “Pick out your board and meet me on the beach.” He turned and walked behind the teenage girl.

There wasn’t much to choose from. I reached for a white board, tucked it under my arm, and exited through the same door Derek used.

I remembered my first time surfing on the set of Spy Cross. I had approached the board like all other tasks—something I could tackle with athleticism. I didn’t know it would be such a humbling experience. It took me almost a week before I could stand on the board, and then another few days before I felt confident enough for the director to start shooting scenes with me upright. They almost called in a stunt double, but I was determined to find my balance on the waves. I didn’t need a double. Most of the scenes were shot as close-ups, but I was still proud I had learned to surf so quickly.

“You ready?” Derek greeted me by the surf.

I felt the waves lap around my ankles. “Yeah, let’s do it.” I gripped the board and waited for him to give me the rundown on Carolina waves.

***

It was almost sunset. I sat in the sand watching the waves wash through the pilings of the pier. The surfing didn’t come back to me as quickly as I wanted. I had spent the entire day wrestling with the board and the waves, but it felt good. My head was clear.

My lungs surged with the salt air, and my muscles ached with exhaustion. It was a damn near perfect day.

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

Chelsea

I listened to the old timers in the corner. “Sure is. Sometime next week’s when I expect her to make landfall. Write it down.”

“Last summer we didn’t have much in the way of storms. Bound to catch up with us. You’re probably right.”

The men went back and forth talking about one of the tropical storms that had been named on the news. I hadn’t bothered to turn on the television. I knew I would hear everything I needed to right here at the store.

It was Sunday and my favorite day to be at work. It was hard to explain, but there was a certain serenity that descended on the island on Sunday, and it even found its way into the general store. The fishing boats still went out and tourists still flocked to the beaches, but the flow of the island slowed to an easy pace.

I knew the men would rock in the chairs and sip at least two cups of coffee before leaving the store. They spent their Sunday mornings in the same corner while their wives were at church. I pulled a scrap of paper from my apron and flattened it.

I had started a song in the shower, and slowly the body of it was unraveling on the paper. These were the days I wished I had my guitar with me. If I had the chance, Sunday mornings would be the perfect time to write.

I looked around for Jake. It was fun writing with him on my porch. He mainly tossed out ideas I had to squash, but that was part of the fun. I had never laughed so much with my guitar in my lap. He reminded me that it was supposed to be fun. Not everything could be emotional and reflective all the time. It starts to take a toll if the lyrics deplete you. With Jake around, it felt like the lyrics were breathing new life into my soul. It energized me like it never had before.

When he had arrived this morning, he smiled, said hello, and immediately started sweeping from the corner of the store. It was the first time I had seen him since the dinner at my parents’ house. Since the hug. Since I melted in his arms in front of the kitchen sink.

I worked six days a week to make up for the money I had to repay my father. Everyone else put in five. That meant Jake was gone for two days. Two long days.

Was it normal to miss someone you didn’t know well? I sighed, knowing the answer was no. Nevertheless, there was something about him that I was drawn to. When he wasn’t around, it was noticeable that the air wasn’t as calm, that I wasn’t as steady.

“Hey.” He strolled to the register. How did he appear like that? It reminded me of a vampire in one of the books I was reading. He showed up when the girl least expected it.

“How was your weekend? Do anything fun?” I asked, looking at his new sunburn. The bridge of his nose was red. Secretly, I had wanted to hear from him over the weekend. Paul had another bonfire, and the thought crossed my mind to invite him. For once, I was trying to take things slow. When we were alone, the brakes were unlocked and things spiraled before either of us could catch our breath.

“Good. Spent some time on the water. How about yours? Write anything new?” He smiled as if he was sharing a secret with me.

“Actually, I’m working on something now. Want to take a look at it?” I twirled the paper around so he could read it. I had never so readily handed over my lyrics before.

He scanned the paper. “This is good. I like it. Maybe even better than the one from the other night.”

“Really?” I blushed. How could anything be better than the other night? My back on the kitchen table, buttons flying everywhere—yeah, that was amazing.

“It sounds a little darker, like you’re coming from a deeper place. Finish it.” He handed me the paper.

He said it like I could do it in five minutes. I intended to finish all of the songs, but it didn’t work that way.

“I will. Hey, I was thinking about sending in the one you helped me with.”

“What do you mean?” He pulled a stick of gum from his pocket.

“I’ve been trying to get a contract with one of the labels in Nashville or Austin since I graduated. Every week I send in at least one—sometimes more than that.” I didn’t know whether to be proud or embarrassed by how high the number was. It grew each week.

He leaned on the counter. “And do you know anyone at the labels? How do you know someone gets them?”

I scrunched my face. It wasn’t as if I hadn’t thought of that before. “No, I don’t know anyone. I wish I knew someone. But eventually, they’ll land in someone’s hands who loves them. I just have to keep sending them.” I was new to the game, but I had researched all of the right contacts at the labels. Every week I switched up my pitch letter before sending another email. It was tedious and sometimes felt like a useless exercise, but it was the only avenue I had.

“But, that’s a crap shoot.”

The words stung a bit. I thought he understood the publishing and discovery process. Wasn’t it the same routine he had to go through with agents and publishers?

I shrugged my shoulders. “What other options do I have if I don’t know anyone in the business? I believe in my songs.” I was annoyed. “Do you have some advice that will land me a big record contract? Do you know a huge star who wants to sing my music?”

He placed one foot behind the other and backed away from the counter. I instantly regretted being such a big mouth. He was always so good at helping me brainstorm. I wanted him to stay longer, but he had a way of ducking out before I got all that I needed.

“Good luck with your music. It’s great stuff.” He winked before disappearing into the hallway. He was probably headed to the rental booth. People loved to paddle on Sunday mornings.

I sighed and looked at the words on my page. Well, that was a disaster.

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

Ben

I kicked a log over with my foot as the flames rushed toward the stars. The work at the store was easy, but at the end of the day, all I wanted to do was sit outside with a cold beer, listen to my favorite music, and see how big a fire I could build. Somewhere on that list, I wanted to add spending time with the girl who had pretty blue eyes, but it seemed best to keep things light with Chelsea. I wasn’t here for all the strings that came with getting attached to a girl like her.

I couldn’t do that to her. She didn’t deserve to get wrapped up in the baggage that came along with the Ben Baldwin package.

I tipped my bottle back. I knew she was waiting for me to ask her out. The hints were there. I also knew spending time with her could only lead to one thing, and if we both were willing… I shook my head, imagining a night alone with her. It would complicate things. Light was best. No drama.

I smiled thinking about how her nose crinkled when I threw out suggestions for her songs. She was damn cute. Every time I saw he spitfire side, I had to fight the urge to pull her close and kiss her. That wasn’t good.

Today was her day off from the store. It didn’t feel the same when she wasn’t there. Whenever I had a break, I found himself wandering to the register to see what words had popped in her head. Instead I’d find Bertie waiting with a to-do list.

I imagined Chelsea spending the entire day cocooned in her hammock, hatching song ideas. There was no doubt she was talented. I couldn’t write a greeting card, much less a song. But I knew she had that special something. When she sang her words, it was like witnessing someone who had figured out how to trap lightning shards in a bottle. The words never left me—they stuck in my head. I was afraid they weren’t going anywhere.

I tossed another piece of driftwood on the flames. If I helped her, it would mean calling in a few favors. They would be small favors, but it involved reaching into the pit. Why did she have to have dreams that took her in that world?

The bottle was empty. I walked into the Sand Dollar to grab another. I had the next two days off in a row, and I planned to finish the case I brought home with me. I wished it didn’t bother me so much that I was going to go three days without seeing her. Three days was way too long. I considered stopping by the store tomorrow to say hey. I could pick up some more beer and steal a smile.

The wind had picked up and every once in a while, instead of reaching high, the flames from the fire whipped sideways. One of the customers at the store had mentioned a storm was off the coast, but everyone had their fingers crossed it would blow on by and miss the island.

I made a mental note to check the radar in the morning. Maybe it meant bigger waves. I might be hitting the surf again tomorrow.

***

I woke up to Silver Sand Dollar rocking every few minutes from a big gust of wind. It howled at the corners. I rubbed my eyes and strolled to the bay window.

I had never seen anything like it. The white caps were wide and high. I wasn’t the only one who had thought about surfing. The ocean was dotted with daredevils.

I scratched my head, considering plans for the day.

The camper door sounded with heavy pounding. “Jake! You in there?”

I pulled on the lever. “Good morning, Carl. How are you?”

The old man steadied himself on the door and climbed up the stairs. “Not too good. Look’s like we’re going to have to evacuate the campground.” His pale eyes filled with concern.

“What?” The skies were gray, but it didn’t look that bad.

“Yep, weatherman’s calling for her to hit tomorrow night. I can’t take a chance with people getting blown away out here. You’ll have to leave the island and come back when she’s all gone.” He pulled a pack of cigarettes from his front pocket and offered me one.

“No, no thanks. I don’t smoke.” I hoped to God he didn’t light up inside the camper. “Does that mean everyone on the island is leaving? How did it get so bad so fast?” I had overheard one of the clerks at the store yesterday making jokes about the bread and milk rations, but I didn’t think much of it until now.

“She must have hit some warm water. Changed over from a tropical storm to a hurricane overnight. Now she’s coming straight for us so it’s best if you pack up and head inland. As long as the bridge doesn’t get wiped out on the other side, you can come back over when the ferry service is up and running again.” He patted me on the back.

I tried to think through my options. I didn’t want to leave Brees Island, but I had never been in a hurricane. I still knew enough to understand that the Sand Dollar wouldn’t be a safe place to stay.

“When do I have to leave?” I had no interest in packing my things in the duffle bag and driving west.

“Mandatory evacuation for nonresidents through tomorrow morning. My guess is they’ll run the ferry all night to get people off the island.” Carl had a hand on the door. “I’ve got to get the word out to everyone else, and then start securing the place.”

“Do you need some help?” I offered.

“I don’t want to keep you. You need to get moving.” He wasn’t convincing.

“I can leave later. Let me help you, please.” I didn’t know what storm prep entailed, but I figured Carl and Flora couldn’t do everything alone.

He paused in the doorway for a minute. “All right, but I want you to make the ferry tonight.”

“No problem. I can do that.” I hoped that sometime in the next twelve hours the storm would change course and I could stay. I would help as long as I could, and buy some time in the process.

Carl smiled. “Get some clothes on and meet me at the office. Flora will have plenty for you to do.” He turned. “Thank you.”

I looked down and realized I had opened the door half-dressed. I laughed. “Will do. Tell Flora I’ll be down soon.”

He hobbled out of Silver Sand Dollar.

I turned on the television overhead, and my eyes widened as I saw the circular shape of the storm hovering in the Atlantic Ocean. What in the hell? Across the screen in big letters was the name of the storm: Hurricane Campbell. I shook my head and turned for the shower.

***

Flo had given me specific instructions for tying the campers down. It was a useless effort if the winds were going to be as strong as predicted. But Carl wasn’t going down without a fight. There were a few scrubby oaks along the backside of the campers, and I looped the heavy rope through the branches before hooking it to each carriage. I had a feeling a wind that strong would rip these poor trees right out of the sand, but there weren’t a lot of options out on the beach like this.

I looked down the shore and watched the surfers congregate. This was paradise to them. The highest waves of the year. They could ride for what seemed like miles.

“Baby, you’re not staying are you?” Alice had a suitcase in her hand.

“No, I’m helping Carl and Flo out before I hit the road.” I walked over and reached for her suitcase. “Let me get that for you.” She looked panic-stricken.

“Oh, thank you. I’m a bundle of nerves with the storm on the way. I hate to leave Pirate’s Booty like this.” She fiddled with her keys until she finally popped the trunk for me.

“I think you’ll be ok, Alice. You’ll make the ferry and you’ll be on your way to clear skies.” I smiled at her and shoved the bag into the car.

“These storms make me so nervous. What if Pirate’s Booty doesn’t make it? This entire beach could be wiped out.” A gust of wind blew her bleach blond hair across her face. “It’s time for me to go.” She threw her arms around my neck. “Don’t stay too much longer. Get on the ferry before tomorrow, ok?” She slid into the driver’s side and rolled down the window.

I didn’t want to give her false hope. There was no way to predict Campbell’s severity. This could be a devastating storm for such a small piece of land.

“I’ll be fine. You be safe.”

“If I don’t see you again, it was nice having you as a neighbor, Jake.”

I smiled. I had waited all summer for Alice to move on, but I had to admit I felt bad parting like this. She was clearly a nervous wreck. I tapped the top of her car and watched as my wacky summer neighbor rolled along the campground drive.

I had one last camper to secure, and then I would shower before packing my bag. The sky was dark but the rain held off. I still hoped that the storm would turn.

I grabbed the rope and attacked another tree.

***

My shoulders ached and my neck throbbed. I had pulled something. The football injuries had a way of resurfacing when my body wanted me to slow down. No time for that. Carl needed help getting the plywood on the office windows. It wasn’t something Flora could handle. I wondered if I would be pushing my luck by spending another night in the Sand Dollar. According to the latest projections, there was still another twenty-four hours before Hurricane Campbell was supposed to make landfall.

The campground was empty. Every one of my neighbors had made it onto one of the ferries. The vessels were all running in one direction, trying to deliver tourists to safer territory as quickly as possible.

I wondered if there was mass chaos at the store. Would Chelsea be there all night selling bottled water and batteries to the locals who stayed behind to face the storm? She was still stuck in my head, and I knew that part of my reluctance to leave the island was tied to her. But she had her parents, her family—she would be fine.

However, technically I was supposed to be at work on Sunday. I hadn’t called the store yet to tell her I was being evacuated. I owed her a phone call before I left.

I pulled up the number to the store and hit send.

“Davis,” Bertie answered on the other end.

“Hey, Bertie, it’s, uh, it’s Jake. Is Chelsea around?” I kicked himself for forgetting who I was supposed to be.

“Jake! We have been worried about you, honey. No one has your number—” She was cut off.

“Jake?” Chelsea must have grabbed the phone from the nosey clerk.

“Yeah. Thought I would check in. How are things going down there?” I leaned against the counter.

“We’re getting ready to close. What about you? I don’t have your number and I feel like an idiot for not having you fill out any paperwork.”

“Close?” I figured they would stay open until the power went out.

“Yeah, we’re cleaned out. The shelves are empty except for some gum and a few rafts.”

“Wow. I guess people take these storms seriously.” I tried to get a visual on an empty store.

“Yeah, it’s crazy. Now we just have to sit and wait for her to hit.” She lowered her voice. “Do you have somewhere to go?”

The question hit me in the center of my chest. It was the tone in her voice. “Uh, no, not really. I packed my bag. I was going to hop the next ferry, but—”

“No, don’t!” She paused. “I meant, don’t leave if you want to stay and feel like trying a hurricane.” She exhaled and her voice was even softer. I knew there had to be a ton of people near the register. It sounded noisy. “You can stay with me. I have room.”

I looked at the bag sitting on the checkered quilt, and then out to the sea that had turned a dark, murky shade.

She sounded remorseful. “Sorry, I thought you might want to stay. Just forget it. Be careful, and will you call when you get back?” She backtracked quickly, and I couldn’t handle disappointing her or the pang her words shot through my chest.

“I’ll meet you at your place.” I closed my eyes, knowing I had just lost it. But I couldn’t stand making a pretty girl sad, not this one.

I grabbed my bag, closed the door, and threw my belongings in the back of the Jeep. I jammed it in reverse before heading straight to Chelsea—before I had a chance to talk myself out of running toward a storm.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

Chelsea

I gripped the steering wheel tightly. I would be home in thirty seconds. As soon as I heard his voice on the other end of the phone, I felt relief followed by instant panic. All day I had been trying to figure out when I could sneak out and drive by the campground. He didn’t know about storms, and I couldn’t remember if there was a TV in the Sand Dollar. The need to warn him and help him distracted me from the minute I knew the storm was going to hit Brees Island. How could I not have his phone number?

And now he was headed to my place to ride out the storm. I was going to have to call my mother and come up with some kind of excuse for not driving there tonight. I would figure out an excuse. This wasn’t something I was willing to undo.

I pulled the car in all the way under the house. There wasn’t much else I could do to protect it. Taking the steps as quickly as I could, I sprinted into my apartment and surveyed my room. Total disaster. My bed was unmade, half the week’s dirty clothes were on the floor, and there was music everywhere.

The music added charm, I thought. The clothes, however, were a mess. I raced around the room, picking up armfuls of T-shirts and sundresses. I shoved everything into the hamper and returned to make my bed. Had I really thought this through? I pulled the comforter tightly under the pillows. We had been working together for a couple of weeks. We had these moments that made me breathless, but should I harbor him during the storm?

I sat on the edge of the bed while my mind sorted through my reasons for inviting him to stay. There was the obvious—he was hot and I wanted to spend the night with him. Did I need to analyze it anymore? Deep down I knew there was a lot more to Jake than what everyone else could see on the outside. He was smart and creative. He might be the first guy who understood music the way I did. It didn’t seem to matter what was going on. He would stop and listen, like every word I said was as important as the sun in the sky. It was almost too good to be true that someone like him had washed up on the island this summer.

I headed into the kitchen. It was cleaner than the rest of the apartment, but there was an unwashed mug and last night’s pasta bowl.

I jumped when I heard the knock at the sliding door. I walked around the kitchen island and slid back the glass.

“Hey.”

I tucked a piece of hair behind my ear and wondered if he could read my thoughts. I was ready to jump him on the porch. He held a duffle bag, filling the entire frame of the door with his broad shoulders. God, he was sexy.

“Hey.” He smiled and stepped in the kitchen. “Thanks for letting me stay. I didn’t really want to evacuate, but the campground is closed. Carl and Flora kicked me out.”

“Oh yeah, absolutely. You shouldn’t have to leave.” Suddenly, the idea of him leaving the island or my house seemed like the worst possible idea.

I flinched as something loud clanged against the side of the house.

Jake reached for my shoulder. “You ok? I think that was your hammock.”

“Yes.” I laughed. “I think I’ve been around too many anxious people all day. The hammock—I guess I need to take that down before the storm hits.”

“Let me help,” he offered. He placed his bag on the floor and walked to the porch. The wind had kicked up another notch.

I followed him. It was nice he was here. He helped store the loveseat, rocking chairs, and hammock in the storage shed under the house. Once the deck was cleared, he worked on the shutters that folded across the windows. There was an advantage to having an old beach house. I had built in shutters rather than plywood and a hammer to cover the windows.

“What about your neighbors? Are they going to secure their part of the house?” He eyed the apartment next to mine.

I hadn’t seen any of my neighbors. Most of them were temporary summer residents, and they rotated weekly.

“I don’t know. I’ll try them.”

I knocked on their doors, but it was possible they had evacuated for the mainland. Jake decided it was best to help everyone out and started hauling their deck furniture down below too.

By the time we finished securing the entire house, it was dark and the rain had started. Big heavy sheets fell on the roof and the beach.

My eyes widened when the lights flickered. “I guess I should get some candles ready.” Most of them were in my room. I walked past Jake and collected a couple to space out around the apartment.

“I didn’t think the storm was going to hit until tomorrow.” He watched me light the candles.

“I think it’s still on course, but if the wind is bad enough, it knocks the power lines down. We lose power all the time. It doesn’t have to be a hurricane.”

“Ok. So now what?” He arched his eyebrows.

I felt a rush of anticipation race through my veins. I reached for a bottle of wine. “How about a drink? A private hurricane party.” I smiled.

I had been surrounded by people on edge about the storm the entire day. Would it destroy homes and businesses? How long would the island be shut down? The locals knew the drill, but it didn’t make the potential impact any less stressful. Right now, I knew exactly how I wanted to release the building tension.

“A drink sounds good.” He took the bottle from me and fastened the corkscrew to the top while I pulled out two glasses from the cabinet.

He filled them over halfway and handed one to me. “To my first hurricane.” He winked.

I had to force myself to drink the wine and stop staring at his face. A face that looked perfect and symmetrical. He had a deeper tan than when he first started working, and his eyes looked relaxed. I wanted to reach up and run my fingers through his hair, but I kept my hands on the wine glass.

“To your first hurricane.” I grinned and took a bigger sip.

The wine tingled the back of my throat just like the excitement racing in my veins. We were utterly alone, and I knew what happened when we were alone—what always happened.

The wind shook the house and the lights flickered to darkness. The only glow came from the candles I had just lit.

“I guess that’s what you mean by a strong wind,” Jake teased and stepped closer. He placed his glass on the counter. His eyes flared in the candlelight. I recognized the look. It was the same one I was wearing.

I nodded, studying his expression. Each time the flame flickered, my heart pounded louder in my chest. I willed it to quiet, but I couldn’t control how I reacted under his stare.

There was nothing I wanted more than his lips on mine. He was so close that I could almost taste them. I had been waiting for another kiss since the last time he had touched me. It was almost all I could think about when he was around, and now he was here, locked in the dark with a wicked hurricane descending upon us.

“Jake,” I whispered.

His hand reached forward, brushing my jaw. His mouth was on mine, hungry and strong. His lips blistered my skin. I clutched at his back, digging into the muscles through his shirt.

I thought I heard a roll of thunder, but my thoughts were clouded with lust—the house might be collapsing—I wouldn’t know. There was another crash, but this time it was our wine glasses hitting the floor as Jake hurled me on the counter.

Enough about music and lyrics and small town stories. This was what we wanted. Taking each other until our world was tipped upside down like a swirling hurricane.

“I can’t stay away,” he groaned. He unsnapped my button and shirked the shorts off my hips. “I tried.”

“I don’t want you to.”

His thumbs hooked under my panties, yanking them over my thighs. My body hummed with urgency.

“But you’re too fucking sweet. So good. So pure.” His eyes were dark. “Like some kind of damn light, drawing me closer. When I know I should be on that ferry getting the hell away from this storm and you.”

“I don’t want you to go,” I whispered.

“I’m not going anywhere, darlin’.” He climbed on top of the island, pinning me under his body. “I’m not running tonight.”

My lips met his. I needed to touch him everywhere. He had to feel the same desperate ache I had. We needed to know each other this way. Whatever the darkness was. The sadness that filled him—I could take it away. I could heal him, if he would just let go.

I watched as he pulled a condom from his pocket before he released the buckle on his shorts and dropped them from his waist, kicking them to the floor below. I had honestly never seen a body like that. It was toned and athletic, and even in the candlelight, I could see where the lines met on his sculpted abs. If it wasn’t for the burning need consuming me, I might lie here all night and study the man inhaling me like his last breath of air.

He kissed my stomach and delivered hot breaths along the trail leading between my legs.

“Mmm.” I exhaled as he pressed my knees wider. “Ohh.”

He drew a line between my folds with his tongue, eyeing me with a kind of intensity I’d never seen in a man’s gaze.

“So sweet in so many ways,” he murmured, teasing me with his tongue. My clit throbbed for him. Everywhere he touched felt fiery and electric. I was afraid I couldn’t handle the scorching strokes even though I needed them.

I reached for his shirt and pulled it over his head, desperate to feel his chest. I unclasped my bra and watched Jake’s eyes fill with desire.

“You are so fucking sexy.” He breathed as his mouth claimed one and then the other nipple. I rocked back on the counter, ready to give this man anything and everything he asked of my body. He had control, and it felt good to let go and unravel into his arms.

“Darlin’, you have to tell me what you want.” He nuzzled my neck. My head tilted back, and everything was spinning inside me.

The storm raged around us as the thunder shook the chandelier overhead.

“Tell me,” he growled.

“What do you want to hear?” I asked, running my tongue along his neck, as if I could drink in part of him this way.

“Tell me what you want me to do to you,” he commanded.

His fingers pushed inside me and started a new motion with his thumb that would lead to toe-curling screams in a few minutes if he didn’t stop. I gasped at the sensation, my breath ragged.

This wasn’t a time to talk. This was a time to feel and let things happen. My throat clamped shut and I closed my eyes. Why was he torturing me like this? I wasn’t sure I could unleash my inner sex kitten like he wanted. All I knew to do was to let my body take over as he gave me pleasure one minute after the next. Wasn’t that enough?

He rested his forehead against mine. I fought for balance.

“Tell me,” he growled.

He kissed my neck, sending shockwaves down my spine. “Don’t tell me, and I can find a pack of playing cards and we can play war all night while we wait for the hurricane.”

Why was it so hard for me to say the words? I wrote my feelings down. I didn’t say them.

He ripped the corner off the foil packet lying on the counter and rolled the condom over his wide throbbing shaft. God, he was built.

“It’s just us. No one else. There’s no one to hear what you want, except me.” His voice was low and sexy. He held my chin with his thumb and forefinger, driving me wild with thirst for him.

The wind whipped the corner of the shutter, and it caught between the latch. His eyes sharpened.

I didn’t know if I could say what I wanted him to do, but it would be worse if I let him move one inch away without trying. I needed him. I needed this. My teeth sank into my bottom lip, and my heart almost pounded out of my chest.

Like the lightning outside, my eyes flashed to his. “Fuck me.”

No sooner were the words between us than our bodies melted together. He grabbed me around the waist. I wrapped my legs around him, pulling fistfuls of hair while his tongue explored my mouth.

It was as if a switch had been flipped, and all the slow and easy dance moves we had been stepping for weeks were gone. Everything about this was primal and raw.

“Ohh,” I whimpered. The tip of his cock pressed against my entrance.

“I want to hear you, baby. I want to hear you when I’m deep inside you.”

My breath caught. My chest seized. My arousal dripped over his cock. My pussy ached for release.

“Please,” I begged. “God, please Jake.”

He brushed his lips over mine, holding my waist. He leaned me backward. I looked into his eyes.

He was pushing me to the tipping point, and if I tipped, I would regret losing control without him. His fingers dug into the inner softness of my thigh. He was determined to drive me crazy, his way.

I moaned again.

The shutters clanged against the windows.

“I want to be inside you, so damn much,” he groaned. “Fuck you until the sun comes up. Fuck you until you forget every man before me.”

I nodded, unable to utter a syllable.

My hips rose, meeting him as his thick cock plunged deep inside me, bowing me off the counter. The next thrust was more intense. I grasped his back and buried my head in his shoulder, consumed with the blissful swirl of pain and incredible fullness he gave me, stretching me, taking me.

“Oh shit,” I hissed as he hit my inner walls with sudden strokes.

“Fuck, Chelsea.”

I arched against him with every thrust, rocking harder and longer. He moved in and out, throwing my legs over his shoulders.

“You’re mine, baby,” he groaned, his hips dancing wickedly as he pumped in and out of me.

I gripped the side of the counter, desperate for an anchor. Anything to tie me to reality. My body was changing, burning, spiraling.

“I-I can’t…” My head shook from side to side.

“Come for me,” he commanded.

There was no way to stop the raging flames. We were too far gone. I looked in his eyes as we surrendered to the fire we had created. I screamed toward the ceiling as he drove into me one last time, possessing me, claiming me like I had always been his—I just didn’t know it until now. The sensations spiraled through my core until all I could do was hold on to him, and pray I could still breathe when I let go.

His body shook, pumping his release inside me. The sweat dripped from his gorgeous chest, splashing in tiny droplets on my breasts. I’d never seen anything sexier in my life. I gasped for air as I vibrated with the orgasm. An aftershock hit me out of nowhere and I clamped around his shaft.

“Fuck,” he groaned. “You’re incredible, baby.”

I sighed.

I wanted to take it back—none of those other moments made me breathless. This made me breathless. I smiled and ran my fingers along his back.

“I’m glad you didn’t run.”

He kissed me. “Me too.” His eyes softened. “You’re worth going down in a hurricane.” He winked.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

Ben

I rolled my neck to the side. I really did pull something when I tied down the campers. I massaged it with my free hand. Chelsea was tucked under my arm, her auburn hair loose and falling over her shoulder. Damn, she took me by surprise. I watched her exhale shallow breaths. I traced the curve of the small of her back, and over her hips, until my hand rested at her waist.

The last time I woke up on a kitchen floor was when I literally drank myself under the table. This time it was for a whole new reason. A blue-eyed island girl had officially knocked me off my ass. My hand feathered over her skin. I couldn’t stop touching her, wanting her.

The shutters rattled against the windows, letting in cracks of gray light. The wind hadn’t stopped howling, and from the sounds echoing outside, I gathered the rain was pooling on the deck.

I could have caught one of the late-night ferries, but who the fuck was I kidding? This was where I wanted to end up all along. The minute I heard her voice on the other end of the phone, I knew it was all over. I was crazy about her. After last night, I would be crazy not to be.

We had turned a corner—gone past innocent make out sessions and flirty banter. It felt connected. As if she was mine. I liked it—how she felt under me, in my hands, how she tasted. The look in her eyes when she came was enough to bring any man to his knees.

I had a reputation as the Texas cowboy who women couldn’t wait to get their hands on. I wasn’t going to lie—a lot of women did. But it didn’t feel like that with her. She wanted me. She didn’t care about some concocted brand. She wasn’t looking for bragging rights that she woke up in my bed. She didn’t give a shit about Ben Baldwin.

Chelsea sighed and her hand slid across my stomach, stirring my cock to life. I was afraid I might lose my mind if I didn’t wake her up right now, but I remembered the muscles in my back and pain in my knees and knew I couldn’t take another session on the kitchen floor. We had done things to each other last night that—Damn. I closed my eyes. Just thinking about it made me want her even more. My dick was hard as steel.

I propped up on my elbows, careful not to let her head fall to the floor. She wiggled in closer, cuddling up under my chin. I sighed. She wasn’t making it any easier. My hand slid over her backside, rubbing in a line along her back, down to her legs. I kissed the top of her head and waited for her to wake.

Her eyes fluttered open. She turned to me with bright eyes and a smile.

“Good morning.” I winked.

She grinned. “Good morning.”

From the corner of my eye, I could see the bed—the place we should have been sleeping all night with a mattress, and pillows, and a soft comforter. I looked at it now as if it was the promised land. I tangled my fist through her silky hair. She moaned quietly as I brought my mouth down hard on hers, and kissed her while rolling the tips of her breast through my fingers. I smiled, feeling her react under my touch. I broke free and rose from the floor.

Her eyes were wide, and for a split second, I considered taking her again on the kitchen floor, but there was a perfectly soft bed twenty feet away.

Without a word, I motioned to her with a finger. She stood and followed me to the bed. There was one thing I wanted to try last night that hadn’t happened yet.

The sheets were cool. I rolled on my back and raked my eyes over her as she walked toward me. Every part of her was beautiful, from the way her hips fit in my palms, to the tan lines running across the lowest part of her stomach. I could spend hours kissing her right there.

She brought one knee down, then the other, and crawled over me. Her hair sweeping my skin as she preyed on me with kisses.

I fought the urge to be inside her right then, pick her up, and show her how hard she made me. There was a hurricane brewing outside, and we had nothing else to do but take our time with each other. I could practice some restraint. The growling though—that was an involuntary response as she brought her legs to either side of my waist. Seeing her straddle me like this was fucking incredible. She rocked back and forth, her hips rhythmically moving over me, but keeping me from where I wanted to be. She wasn’t making this easy.

“Does that feel good?” she teased.

I laughed, catching her face between my hands and stared straight into those blue eyes. “Yes. Fuck yes, darlin’.”

“Then I’ll just have to keep doing it.” She bit my bottom lip, and I questioned how long I could hold off. She knew exactly what to do to drive me crazy.

She leaned over my shoulder, retrieving a foil packet from the bedside drawer. I yanked it from her and quickly rolled it over my cock.

She sighed, planting a kiss on my chest.

The heat built, and I reached for her hips. It might have been a growl or a groan coming from my throat. I wasn’t in control anymore of what she was doing to me. As soon as she had arched away she came shattering down around me. Shit, it was the hottest sweetest pussy I’d ever known.

I gripped the soft skin on her back and squeezed her to my chest, but she wouldn’t let me hold her. All I wanted was to press her against my body so I could feel every tremble and quiver surging through her, but she was strong and playful. A wicked smile spread across her lips as she pushed off my chest and sank deeper on top of me, tightening around my cock.

“Chelsea.” I watched her as she fucked me. Up. Down. Her breasts moving with the rhythm—it was sexy and hot. I reached out to touch her. I wanted her tits in my hands.

“Don’t stop, baby. Don’t fucking stop,” I commanded.

She leaned across my chest, nipping at my neck. I couldn’t hold back any longer. She was taking me under. I grabbed her waist and pulled her against me as I drove hard into her, filling her with everything I had.

“Oh shit,” she whimpered as I pushed deep.

I liked being in control in bed, I was used to it, but I didn’t know which way was up as she slid along my dick, making everything hot and tight. I was so lost in her that I didn’t care about the storm, or that she kept trying to take the reins.

“I want you to come like this.” I stared at her, coaxing her body to do what I wanted. “Come for me, baby.”

She clenched around my cock, squeezing with vise-like strength.

All the air left my lungs, and I pulled her to my chest.

“Fucking you is amazing,” I whispered in her ear as the first orgasm hit her. She was unstoppable. Unbelievable. She rode me harder and rougher until my spine spasmed. Fuck.

She gripped the headboard as I thrust into her.

“Oh God, Jake,” she screamed.

The twinge of guilt sliced through me. She should be screaming my name. I wanted to hear Ben spilling from her lips. This girl should know who she’s fucking. But I couldn’t concentrate. My cock twitched and I lost all control.

“Fuck, baby. Shit,” I hissed, rolling her onto her back. I sank deep inside her, searching for home. Needing her. Consuming everything she would give me.

She wrapped her arms and legs around me while I unleashed myself, emptying everything I had in a long ragged breath.

I collapsed on her chest, kissing her shoulder.

“Oh my,” she whispered. “Is it ok if I can’t really talk?”

I chuckled. “Yeah. It’s ok.”

My eyes closed and I drifted back to sleep while the storm moved closer to shore. I slept soundly. My body relaxed, knowing I found exactly what I was looking for.

***

“Jake. Jake, wake up.” I heard words, but they didn’t make sense.

“Huh?” I rubbed my eyes and saw Chelsea standing next to the bed. She was wearing my shirt and no pants. I propped up, wondering if there was anything else under the shirt.

“I made breakfast. It’s almost noon. I thought maybe you’d like to eat something.”

“Yeah. Sounds good.” I leaned against the headboard and rubbed my neck. “What’s going on with the storm?” I asked.

“Campbell?”

I grimaced at the name. Reminders of Rebecca weren’t welcome right now. “Still on course?” I questioned. We probably should have checked the updates sooner.

Chelsea smiled. “Good news, she’s downgraded to a category one, and we’re only supposed to get the outer bands. Don’t get me wrong, we’ll still be out of power and I’m sure there will be water in the yard, but I think we dodged anything major.”

“That is good news.” I peeled the sheet back, anxious to make a stop in the restroom and splash some water on my face, maybe even take a shower. I hoped like hell we had hot water.

Chelsea’s eyes raked over me and she flashed a smile. It was cute how it made her blush.

“Um, I’ll see you in a minute.” She spun on her heels, the turn catching the edge of the T-shirt. I saw the lacy edge of her panties, cutting a sharp V along her hip.

“Damn, girl.” I sucked in a gulp of air and hopped off the bed. I smiled. I had a feeling I knew how the rest of this day was going to go.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

Chelsea

Two days. Two long, blissful, ravishing, surrendering, intimate days alone and uninterrupted. This hurricane went down as the best-timed storm in my life. The water had halfway receded in the yard. Jake and I both knew he could drive his Jeep in the conditions, but he said he couldn’t leave me there with no way to escape if I needed to.

I wanted to think it had nothing to do with transportation and everything to do with how he felt tangled up with me in my bed.

The day after a storm passed through was always the most gorgeous. The beach was littered with whole conch shells, and other treasures washed ashore from the turbulent tides.

I held up a piece of beach blue against the sun. The hue was almost the same color as the sky. “Hey, check this one out.” He probably wouldn’t know how rare it was to find a piece this big, smooth, and blue.

Jake jogged over to where my feet were planted in the wet sand. “That one’s cool. But look at this.” He grinned before revealing a long strand of conch eggs encased in a spiral coating.

“Oh yeah, that’s a mermaid’s necklace.” I took the spiral and held it against my neck. “We always called them that when I was little. Really, it’s full of baby conchs.”

“Hmm, I thought I made a big discovery.”

I giggled at the disappointed look on his face. It was fun exploring the beach with him. It was the first time I remembered seeing it from an outsider’s perspective. Growing up on Brees Island, it seemed like the same old stuff every day. But Jake had a way of turning that around on me.

We were lucky. Hurricane Campbell had made a drastic shift to the east before reaching the island’s latitude. The inland areas around the cove saw the most water, but other than a few broken windows, there weren’t any reports of major damage. Only washed out roads. Given another day or two, the water would recede and life would return to normal. The tourists would be back and the store would reopen.

Jake’s hand rested against my waist as I leaned into his chest. For now, I wanted the water to stay in my yard, keep me stranded, and keep me in his arms. Nothing could convince me to leave this place of contentment.

“You know my neighbor, Alice, should see all these.” He stooped to pick up an olive shell.

“Isn’t she the crazy one?” I couldn’t believe there were sand dollars dotting the beach. You could only find them on low tide days near the sandbar, and even that was a rarity.

“Crazy as hell, but she loves collecting shells. Her yard is full of them—rows and rows.” He scooped up one of the sand dollars. “I think I’ll save a few of these for her.” He walked over to the bucket we had brought and placed the sea discoveries inside.

“Better get them now because between the beach combers and the tide, they will all be gone tomorrow. It will be like none of this ever happened.”

The words hung in the air and my stomach twisted. I meant the shells and the beach treasures, but I realized that maybe I had accidentally created a double meaning in the words. How do you pull words back in that you don’t want to have spoken?

As if he knew exactly what I was thinking, he reached for my chin and held it firmly between his thumb and forefinger. The look in his eyes stole my breath. “I’m going to throw this out there. Ok?”

I nodded, locked on his gaze, dying to know what he was about to say.

“This did happen.” His voice was deep and low. “And it is happening.” He pressed his lips against my mouth. I dropped whatever sandy treasure was in my hand and wrapped her arms around his neck. I had to stand on my tiptoes to reach him. His lips tasted salty. I nipped at his neck, lowering my heels to the ground.

He grasped my shoulders and kissed me on the forehead. “This has been my all-time favorite Sunday.”

I smiled. Maybe I wasn’t the only one who loved Sundays on the island. My hand slipped into his, and I kicked a wave that washed toward me. There were other words I wanted to say. I wanted to talk about what was happening and what it meant. Were we a couple? Were we dating now? But we had never been on an actual date. Did that mean something? I tried to quiet the questions storming my mind. I knew they would shatter the moment, and this Sunday was perfectly shatterproof.

He squeezed my hand. “What are you thinking over there?”

I squinted in the sun. “I think I know what song I want to write next. The whole song just hit me.”

“Really?”

“Yep. Want to hear it?” I couldn’t wait to get to the porch and play out the words.

“Lead the way.” His smile melted all the stress and anxiety away. It warmed me like the sun.

I tugged on his hand, crossing the beach and heading for the dunes. I was ready for him to hear the song that hit my heart like a crashing wave.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

Ben

I knew everything happened for a reason. I ran my fingers through my hair, rinsing the shampoo down the shower drain. I wanted to be there when she woke up tomorrow, but after three nights together, I thought it best to spend a night in the Sand Dollar alone.

The water felt good, but my decision didn’t. I knew I easily had a chance to tell Chelsea my name, my identity, but I let it slip by.

I closed my eyes, remembering how she whispered my name in my ear last night. But it wasn’t my name. It was someone else’s. It hit me in the chest, and for a minute, I couldn’t breathe, thinking of how I had betrayed her.

I wondered if I could be that someone else. Could I just change my name to Jake Grady and pretend Ben Baldwin didn’t exist? Damn it. I had screwed up.

It was one thing to flirt with her, but during that storm, I had made her mine with my mouth, my hands, and my words. Crazy as it sounded, I wasn’t about to give her back until I absolutely had to.

The longer I waited to tell her, the worse it would be when it came out. I couldn’t help thinking I didn’t have to reveal my name. After the call to Rick this morning, I knew she would get a chance with her music. As passionate and talented as she was, she would snatch it up and chase the opportunity all the way to Austin. Nashville was probably her first choice, but I had some good buddies from my football days that wound up in Austin—easy strings to pull. She could make a name for herself with those lyrics.

I turned the knob on the shower and reached for a towel. Hell, she didn’t even go to the movies; she had never seen one of Rebecca’s films and never mentioned any of mine. It wouldn’t mean anything to her at all. I tightened the towel around my waist and walked a few paces to the mini-fridge. A cold beer might help solve this. I twisted the lid and tossed it into the sink.

The bubbles slid down my throat. I knew I was just coming up with excuses. I had to tell her. Because as much as this might be a summer thing—I knew something about myself that she couldn’t. I had given her control like I never had. It was scary and ignited something, like an unquenchable thirst. Once I turned it over to her, I wanted to get lost in her over again—I couldn’t stop. If that hurricane had lasted all week, I knew I probably would have drowned trying to satisfy and please her in all the ways I knew I could.

I thought about what coming clean would mean. Would I drag her into the cesspool of paparazzi life? Would the press hunt her down and track her every move at the store? Would her parents be faced with camera flashes as they went to church and watered their garden? I pounded my fist against the counter. I couldn’t do that to her. It would invade and ruin her life, seeping into all of the things that were private and special. It would ruin us, like all my relationships before: Clara, Becs, all lost to the fishbowl I called my life. No, this one was mine. I was going to keep Chelsea to myself as long as she would let me.

There was a reason for all this madness. I just didn’t know what it was yet. I reached in the fridge for a second beer when I saw headlights shine through the camper window.

I thought it might be another day before Alice or any of the other neighbors returned. There was still water on the mainland roads, and the ferry service was backed up. It was better to wait a few days for things to calm down, but I knew Alice was a tenacious one. She would be desperate to see Pirate’s Booty. Carl and Flora had reopened the campground, happy they didn’t sustain any damage. I was proud of the work I had done to help them.

The cap twisted off in my hand easily, and I heard the door rattle with heavy banging.

I looked at my towel and debated trying to change before opening the door to Alice. She would get an eyeful.

Hell. I pushed down on the lever and the door swung open.

“Hey.” Chelsea smiled.

My throat caught and my chest tightened. I pulled her into the camper and twisted my hands through her hair, crashing my mouth onto hers. The need for her washed through me as I shifted her around my waist. It was only ten steps back to my checked bedroom. I stumbled backward onto the bed, where I could kiss and touch her. I grinned as her hair cascaded around me, providing a private curtain for the two of us. I was going to get to wake up with her after all.

***

“Ok, so who is going to be at the party?” I shifted nervously on my feet. It was not a good idea to be seen in a throng of twenty-somethings, but I had been on the island for over a month and no one seemed to notice.

Everyone here focused on other things. No one cared what designer you wore, what car you drove, or if you had white, straight teeth. All that mattered was that you put in a good, hard day’s work, and helped your neighbor. It was pretty simple. Every once in a while, I wondered if they would even care that I was a movie star. The longer I was there, the more I doubted it would be as exciting as the marlin that was released the other day or the fact that the only mail carrier on the island was about to deliver twins. Their idea of a crazy life was full of moments that actually mattered.

Chelsea chimed from the bathroom. “Some people I went to high school with. The guy who is throwing the party, Paul McIntire, is kind of a show off. But the parties are always good, and there is always a bartender and music. It’s a Thursday night tradition in the summer and sometimes a Tuesday thing.”

I didn’t think it sounded like anything else I had encountered during my time on Brees.

“And why are we going? Wouldn’t you rather stay in?” I could think of so many other things for us to do. I had lived my share of parties. More than anyone could count. Although, I was sure someone had a tally of my adventurous nights. “I bet you wrote something pretty cool today. You could sing for me.” I missed her today at the store. Thursdays without her were lonely.

“Because, I haven’t been in a while. I want you to go and have a good time too. Meet some people I grew up with.” She turned the light out behind her as she emerged into the bedroom wearing something black.

I whistled. “Damn. I say no way. You’re not going like that.” I hadn’t seen her dressed like this before. Granted, I didn’t know what the style was called, but it was short. There were tiny straps, and lace that darted between the breasts I couldn’t get enough of. The hem brushed the tops of her tanned thighs.

“What, you don’t like it?” She looked hurt.

“The complete opposite, but I’m not sure I want guys staring at you all night.” I played with the hair by her ear, winking at her. It always made her blush.

She slapped my chest. “No one is going to stare. I know all these guys.” She tilted her chin toward me, taunting me to kiss her. “But I hope you do. It’s a slip dress. I ordered it the other day.”

“Darlin’, you don’t have to put on a short dress to make me check you out.” I pinned her against my chest. “You even look cute in those ugly aprons. Although, someone told me I don’t.”

Her hands flattened against my shoulders and ran down my arms. I liked it when she did that. She raised my shirt and her nails scraped against my stomach, descending below my hipbone. I inhaled sharply. We wouldn’t be going anywhere if she kept this up. But she didn’t stop.

“What are you doing?” I groaned. “Don’t we need to get going?” I asked.

I gripped her shoulders, trying to steady the building want she was creating. What in the hell had gotten into her?

“I need to take care of something first,” she purred.

“Is that right?” I taunted.

Before I could pull away, she tugged my shorts to my ankles. She lowered to the floor. I looked down at the fire in her eyes. This girl might kill me before we made it to the party.

She licked her lips. “Mmmhmm.” Her hands worked the band on my boxer briefs until my cock bounded free in front of her wide eyes.

“Oh baby. You’re playing a dangerous game,” I teased, pressing the tip of my cock to her lips.

“Am I?” Her tongue ran along my throbbing shaft.

“That dress. Those lips.” I gnashed my teeth. “My cock.”

She nodded. “Yes. Before the party.”

I was willing to be late for this. We backed up toward the bed and I sat on the edge. Chelsea knelt in front of me. I saw the determination in her eyes as she took my dick in her hands, fisting it before lowering her mouth.

Her head bobbed as she enveloped my cock with her sweet lips.

“Fuck,” I growled, yanking her hair in my hands, guiding her up and down.

Every time she sucked me, she made progress, taking me to her throat. “Damn it, baby. Yes.” I thrust forward.

I’d never seen lips look so fucking sexy in my life as I slid between them. I could watch my cock in her mouth all night—but we had other plans.

I jolted forward, making her sputter and inhale.

I guided the back of her head, drawing her tighter to my dick.

“Harder,” I urged. “More, baby.”

She was so damn eager to please me. She was relentless. Her eyes teared at the corners as she twirled her tongue along my pulsing shaft. It felt fucking incredible. She drew her lips to the head before I thrust to the back of her throat again.

“I’m going to come,” I groaned.

My spine tingled and clutched. The fire warmed my belly just as my release exploded in her mouth. She sucked and slurped, not slowing down.

She rose with a triumphant smile on her face.

“Ok. Now we can go to the party,” she announced.

I fell back on the bed.

***

I closed my hand around Chelsea’s as we walked through the gates to the beach party. We had left her place a little later than planned, but it was time well spent. Her blow jobs were fucking awesome. I laughed, loving the surprises that she kept throwing at me. I squeezed her hand.

We climbed the steps to the beach house. “Hi, Paul. This is Jake.”

A guy with way too much hair gel in his bangs shook my hand. “Nice to meet you, man. Glad you’re here, Chelsea. Haven’t seen you in a few weeks.”

She gave him a quick hug. “I know, sorry, I’ve just been a little busy.” She shot a side glance at me. I caught every innuendo she was throwing.

“Well, I’ve missed you. Go on in. Drinks, dancing, the usual good time.” He nodded at me. “Good to have you here, man.”

“Thanks.” I shook his hand and waited for some sign of recognition. Confident the coast was clear, I breezed past the host with Chelsea. I whispered in her ear, “He seems nice. Out of place, but nice.”

She giggled. “Yeah, he loves parties a little too much. Lucky for him, his parents are never here. They basically handed him a summer party palace.”

I followed her and her little black dress through a marble foyer into a great room.

The living room was filled with strangers. It was a relief looking into blank, smiling faces.

“Big party.” I slid my hand around her waist, feeling how thin the fabric was in the slip dress, as she called it. I couldn’t wait for round two when I took her home. There were so many things running through my mind, mainly—

“Why don’t you head to the deck, and I’ll get us some drinks?” She pointed to the glass doors lining the living room wall.

My cheeks reddened. Did she know that I couldn’t stop thinking about her? “Ok, but nothing fruity. I don’t do fruity.”

“I know. I know. I’ll meet you out there.” She tipped forward and kissed me on the cheek.

I sidestepped the bouncing crowd. They had just started dancing, and I had to hop before getting bumped by a trio of giggling girls. The deck was probably the safest place for me to be. I walked to the railing and looked at the pool. There was a neon techno show going off under the water. This place didn’t fit with the rest of the island. Nothing about it was like the Brees I had come to call home.

“Hey, man. What’s up?”

“Oh, hey.” I turned to find Derek, my surf advisor, standing close by. “Good to see you.”

“What brings you to Paul’s?” Derek took a gulp of something from a red cup.

I nodded toward the house. “Pretty girl.” I smiled, not knowing Derek well, but knowing any guy could relate to the allure of a beautiful woman.

“I hear ya.” He laughed. “Yeah, there are some pretty girls here this summer. The hurricane ran a few off, but since the ferries started running again, I think the island is back to normal.”

I wondered if that was how Derek measured the balance of normal—the pretty girl ratio on the island.

“Did you hit the waves during the storm?” I asked.

“You know it. We don’t get waves like that. Killer breaks. You should have tried it.”

I shook my head. “I wanted to, but it was probably best I sat that one out. It’s going to take me awhile to get back into fighting form.” The first time I wiped out on the board had shocked me. Saltwater up the nose and everything.

“Keep at it. You’ve got some natural ability.”

“Thanks, man.” I leaned over the railing to watch the pool below us.

“Der?” I turned. Chelsea was holding two red cups, but her attention wasn’t on me. It was on Derek.

“Hey. Haven’t seen you in a while.” Derek’s eyes darted to hers. I couldn’t help but feel there was something to that look.

“Do you two know each other?” She questioned. There was the smile I was waiting for. She handed me a drink and stood close. My hand found the dip in the small of her back.

“Yeah, Derek helped me out a couple weeks ago. I needed a crash course in the waves.” I liked that she was tucked in close. I could smell her shampoo, and her lotion reminded me of the beach.

Derek’s expression had changed. I winced, remembering the exchange I had witnessed between him and Chelsea. I hadn’t thought of it since, but now, standing between the two of them, it was all I could think about. Something happened that made Derek quit the store, and I knew it somehow involved Chelsea.

I pulled her closer. I wanted her to know I was here for her, that if this was awkward or weird, it didn’t matter. I had her.

“How are things at Wave On?” She tried to sound cheerful and interested.

Derek’s stare bounced between us. “Really, Chelsea?”

“Yes, how are things going? Do you like it?” I thought I felt her shudder.

“I don’t know what Derek thinks about it, but if you ask me, it is the best job on the island. Lucky, man.” I tipped my red cup in his direction. I hoped some of the earlier man-to-man bonding would resurface. I was trying to give Derek a way out of this mess.

“Yeah, yeah. It’s pretty cool.” He cracked a smile. “I get to surf. I’m on the beach all day. Who has complaints?”

“Aw, I’m so glad it worked out for you.” Chelsea took a sip and nervously bit on her lower lip.

I couldn’t stand it anymore. I had to get her out of here. “Nice to see you again. Chelsea was just getting ready to give me the grand tour. So, I’ll see you later? Maybe on the beach.”

Derek reached out to shake my hand. “Sounds good. Have a good time. Catch you later.”

I pressed my hand into the small of her back, and steered her away from the railing and into one of the adjoining sunrooms off the deck.

“You ok?” I searched her eyes for answers.

“Yes, I’m fine.” But I could tell she wasn’t. She was shaking.

I took the cup from her hand and placed it on the coffee table. It looked like this room was decorated for South Beach. Everything was aqua green and pale peach. I wrapped both arms around her and tugged against her until she crumbled in my arms.

“Shhh. Shhh. Whatever happened, you’re ok.” I stroked her hair, wishing I could wipe away the tears and all the hurt in one swoop.

“It’s not.” She looked up. “I hurt Derek. I see it more now than ever. I’m a terrible person.”

“Oh, I don’t think you’re a terrible person. I doubt he thinks that either.” I held her face between my hands. Did any girl ever look this beautiful when she cried?

Her gaze drifted to the floor. “It’s kind of strange to talk about this with you. I’m sorry.”

“Hey.” I held her wrist. “You can talk to me about anything. Anything at all. Ok?” I would sit in this dark sunroom all night if she needed me to. I was certain of that. “Were you two together?”

The look of shock on her face didn’t tell me anything. I didn’t want to be a jealous ass, but I saw how Derek watched her. Why else would he be such a dick about everything?

“Don’t answer that.” I shook my head. “It’s none of—”

“No. Not really.” She tipped forward on her toes and met my lips with a soft kiss. “You’re the only one I’ve been with this summer.”

I knew I didn’t deserve it and I didn’t deserve her, but I buried my face in her shoulder and inhaled her shampoo, drawing her against me.

“Good, because I didn’t want to have to punch my surf advisor.” I nipped at her neck, and smiled as I heard her giggle. As long as I was making her happy, I knew I was doing something right.

“Can we get out of here?” She chewed on her bottom lip, and her eyes sent waves of seductive signals.

“Baby, I’ve been asking that since we got here. Hell, yes.” I took her by the hand. “Want to go bunk?”

Chelsea’s laughter peeled through the sunroom. “You know that’s funny and wrong on so many levels?”

I winked and led her home, where we could be alone, together, and lost in each other.

***

“Rick? Hey, have you made any of those Austin calls for me?” I waited for my coffee to cool.

“I did. A few of the guys said to tell you hello. I told them you were on a little vacay or you would have called yourself.” He chuckled.

“Thanks, man. So, what’s the verdict?” I was hoping at least one would be willing to look over the songs.

“See, the thing is, Ben. People kind of like you. So out of the five I called, all five want to see the songs.”

I blinked. “All of them?”

“Yep. They hear Ben Baldwin is backing a songwriter, and it’s practically a done deal. You’re kind of a superstar in Texas.” Rick was buttering me up for something; I just didn’t know what it was.

“All right, so what’s the next move? How do I get the songs to them?” I had a notepad in front of me, waiting for a rundown on how to submit Chelsea’s music.

“Well, they do want to know who she is. Where is she from? What’s her background? You can understand. They don’t want to start publishing a crackhead. Not that you’d endorse one, boss, but you know—general information is a good place to start.”

This was the threshold I was worried to cross, but Chelsea had told me several times that she sent songs in every week. Those emails had to have some kind of contact information. I sighed heavily into the phone.

“Ok. How about I email you a bio and a package with three songs. Will that work?”

“You still using email? I thought you had given the stuff up.” Rick laughed at his joke.

“Very funny. Yes, I’ve still got email. You’ll have something from me in a couple of days.”

“I’ll look for it.”

“Now, the second reason for my call.” O slid the paper across the table. “What is going on in that damn mind of Rebecca Campbell? I saw another article yesterday.”

“Look, there’s nothing else we can do on this end. If you’re not willing to do an interview and you won’t let me put out a statement, my hands are tied. I tried talking to her, but you’re forgetting America’s sweetheart is in love with you. Anything I say makes us both look like assholes.”

I slumped in the seat. Sort of like the hurricane that had swept through last week, I thought Rebecca’s two-week publicity stunt would die down. That was a rookie thought—she was gorgeous, popular, and publicly declaring her love. People were going to eat that up as long as she was putting it on the buffet.

“Damn it, Rick. We have to shut this down.”

My stomach was in knots, thinking Chelsea was going to figure this out any day. It was a sordid puzzle on public display—the pieces all around her, she just didn’t know it. How would I explain Becs and the lies she was spreading? Everyone believed her. She was Rebecca freakin’ Campbell.

“Ok. Ok. I haven’t tried all my sources. Give me a few days, send that email, and we’ll regroup,” he assured me.

I closed my eyes. I could count on Rick to figure this out. It is why he was known as the best and why I paid him so much.

“Sounds good. I knew I could count on you. Thanks.” I hung up, placing the phone on the table and took a sip of coffee.

I was going to have to get the songs from Chelsea. That part of the plan I hadn’t worked through. It was Saturday, another full day off. I could sit on the beach all day and figure this one out.

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

Chelsea

I parked my bike in the rack in front of the library. My song portfolio was tucked under my arm. Jake had asked if he could have copies of the songs I sang for him. He wanted to read them again, he said. The library was the only place on the island I could make copies without prying eyes. If I stepped anywhere near the copier in my father’s office, I would get the lecture on how I had wasted too much time on lyrics. Get a real job, Chelsea. I had heard it a thousand times. Since it was Monday, he was in the office going over bills and accounts.

I smiled, clutching the music to my side. If Jake wanted my music, it must mean something to him. I brushed my hair over my shoulder and opened the door to the one-room island library.

It had been three weeks since he started at the store. I knew I was supposed to find a replacement for him, but he hadn’t brought up his temporary status lately. He seemed happy at the store, like it was something he actually enjoyed. Honestly, I didn’t want to hire someone else. We got to spend four days in a row together at work, and then I knew we would spend the next four nights rotating between my apartment and Silver Sand Dollar, depending on who had the following day off.

I loved waking up in the Sand Dollar. It felt like we were the only two people in the world when we were there. Who needed other people? I giggled as I dropped quarters into the copier and placed the first page face down on the scanner. I hit copy.

If I could wake up every day with him, I would. But I was trying to be careful—give him his space. Guys liked space. I couldn’t help feeling though that he was ok with a little too much Chelsea time. Maybe it was because he always pulled me back under the covers, or because he called on the nights when we were apart to check on me, or because he snuck me into the storage closet at work and kissed me like it was our last day on Earth.

I placed the next sheet down and hit copy.

The summer days were slipping by and I didn’t know how long he was going to stay. It made my stomach hurt thinking about him leaving. What if I was the one who left? Nothing had changed with my music. It was my soul, my reason for existing, but lately, I knew I had a new reason to exist and it had something to do with a hot Texas boy.

I exhaled and put another page of lyrics on the screen. I watched the green laser shoot under the lid when I heard the voice—the voice that made me want to vomit and punch something at the same time.

“Rosie, do you have any of those new steamy Raven books? I can’t get enough of those.” Eileen Meeks was ten feet behind me at the library desk, whispering and laughing about some tacky romance smut.

Rosie, the only librarian on the island, slid her glasses forward and smiled. “Two more came in over the weekend. They aren’t even on the shelves yet. Wait here and I’ll get them for you.”

I clenched my teeth and whipped the pages into my portfolio. Two songs were copied, but I still had one more. The only thing keeping me at the task was that Jake wanted them. This meant something to him.

“Well, hey there, Chelsea.” Eileen tapped me on the shoulder.

I didn’t know if I could turn around and face the woman who had been sleeping with my father. Eileen ran one of those seashell gift shops that was only open in the summer. Come October, she packed up and headed to Florida for the winter. She was always bragging about her Tampa condo, but I sometimes wondered if it really existed. Could you really make enough money selling painted starfish for three months to last all year? I choked on the realization that maybe Eileen’s winter paradise was funded another way—by someone who had steady, substantial income. Oh, God, I couldn’t look at her; I couldn’t stomach it.

“Honey? You ok?” Eileen tilted her head to the side.

I gathered the last page off the copier, shoved it inside the folder, and darted out of the door. The July heat fell around me like the curtain of awareness that had just come down. My father, Eileen, the affair—it wasn’t new. It couldn’t possibly be new. I gripped the handlebars, nudged the kickstand up, and headed toward the store.

***

“Hey, killer, where are you going?” Jake called from the rental booth. I shoved the bike into the rack and stormed toward the employee entrance. He was quite possibly trailing me. I heard the screen door slam behind me.

The store was cool, but my neck was damp with sweat and my chest heaved with anger and exertion. My father’s office was at the end of the hall. The door was closed.

“Whoa, Chelsea. What’s going on?” Jake’s hand landed on my shoulder, and I spun around to face him.

“I have something to say to my father. To ask him.” My hand was shaking and my bottom lip quivered.

“Wait. Wait. Talk to me first,” he urged. His eyebrows arched with concern.

“I-I can’t wait. He needs to hear this.” My voice cracked. “I need answers.”

Jake looked over my head, and then ushered me into the supply closet before I could protest. He flipped the light switch and locked the door behind us.

“I’ve never seen you look like this. Can you talk to me first?” He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. “Maybe I can help you, darlin’.”

I felt the pent up hostility and rage seep through my body one deep breath at a time. Jake stood, his eyes fixed on me, while I inhaled and exhaled the anger away. His palms cupped my face.

“Can you tell me what has you so upset?” he asked.

The only other person I had told was Derek, and though he guarded my family secret, he wasn’t sympathetic. It made me feel alone. I looked into Jake’s eyes, the pools of gray-green that warmed my soul, that soothed the desperation taking hold, that told me everything really would be ok if I let him take care of me.

“I-I— He’s—” I couldn’t get the words out. They were stuck in the back of my throat. If I said them, he would know how ugly my life was at home.

He drew me against his chest and slid to the floor, pulling me into his lap. “You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to. But we’re not leaving this room until I know you are ok. Got it?” He kissed me on the forehead.

“He’s having an affair.” I blurted it out and the rest of the words followed like a roller coaster. “He’s cheating on my mom with the island whore.” Then the tears followed. “My parents have been married thirty years. Who cheats after thirty years?” I pushed against his chest to sit up. “I want him to answer for it. I want him to explain to me how he could do this to her. To us.” I wiped the tears from my cheeks and felt the anger taking hold again. “I think it’s been going on for years.”

Jake looked stunned. “That is not what I thought you were going to say. Not at all. Didn’t see that coming.” He tilted his head to the side. “But it does explain a lot. You can barely stand being in the same room with him.”

“It’s that obvious?” I asked.

“Yeah, you clam up and that glow you have dims into something cold. To be honest, it makes me not like your dad. Anyone who can make you turn that light off has got to be a dick.”

I smiled. I felt the heaviness of the tears on my eyelashes as I closed my eyes and leaned to kiss him.

“Can I put that in a song?” I broke away to ask.

“You mean I said something lyrical other than bunk?” He shifted back on his hands.

“Yeah, it was poetic.” I inhaled the lingering salt and cologne mixture on his T-shirt. It would be perfectly fine with me if we stayed in the supply closet for the rest of the day. I didn’t want to face my father or the world on the other side of the door.

“Did something happen just now? You had that look of a woman on a mission when you tore in here.”

I thought about Eileen and the library. “I ran into her. I took my lyrics to the library to copy for you, and she tried to talk to me.” I paused. “That woman has no idea I know, but I couldn’t even look at her. I ran out of the library like a lunatic.”

“An understandable lunatic.” He grinned. “That’s a lot to handle.”

I lowered my head. “I haven’t told my mom. I don’t know if I should tell her. I want to, but it will ruin her. It will destroy her life and everything she knows. How can I do that to her?”

“I’m not going to tell you what to do. However, you are not the one responsible for your mother’s unhappiness. You can’t do anything to destroy her life. That’s all on your dad. That’s between the two of them. You hear me?”

I nodded.

“Have you been keeping this all to yourself?” He kept his voice low.

“I told Derek, but we’re not really on speaking terms. It’s the worst secret and I don’t want to tell anyone. I’m so embarrassed.”

Jake took me by the shoulders. “You have nothing to be embarrassed about. You didn’t do anything. I’m sorry you’re going through this. I wish I could fix it for you.” He sighed.

I worked my way out of his lap to stand. “Thanks for listening and for keeping me from punching my dad. It helped.”

He followed my lead, taking his time to stretch his long legs. “Anytime. Probably not a good idea to hit him, if you want my opinion. But, if you need me to, you know where to find me.” He pulled the strings on his apron and tightened the knot. “So, what are you going to do?”

I reached for the lock. “I don’t know, but I’m not going to do it today—and not in a crazy rage. Thank you.” I perched on my toes to kiss him. “I feel much better. The problem is still there, but I feel better.”

“Then, my job is done. I’ve to get back outside. It’s so hot today everyone wants to snorkel. I haven’t told anyone yet you can’t see your hand in front of your face if you swim in the creek. They can figure that out on their own.” He chuckled. “You good?”

“Yeah, I’m good.” I smiled as he checked both directions in the hall before walking back to the docks.

I took another deep breath and reached for the light. The problem with my father still existed, but Jake had kept me from doing something I would have regretted. He was balance and reason, fire and lightning, all in one. I pulled the storage door behind me, knowing I needed all those things more than the air I breathed.

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

Ben

Shiner was known for its annual crawfish festival. Texans flocked from all over the state to hear their favorite bands, compete in the cook-off contest, and fill up on cotton candy and funnel cakes. My mother always donated cookies for the church’s baked goods stand, and my older sister usually ended up selling them. When Chelsea told me Brees Island’s Sea Breeze festival was this week, it was hard not to think of home.

It was getting harder and harder not to be homesick for Texas. For the ranch.

Davis General Store was the biggest sponsor of the event, and all week the staff had been putting in extra hours to help the village gear up for the all-day festival.

It didn’t matter to me that Friday was supposed to be my day off. I gripped the corner of a banner and took the steps of the ladder until I was eye level with the fire station’s garage door.

“Don’t fall,” Chelsea warned from the ground.

“Darlin’, I’ve got balance. Don’t you worry.” I fastened the ties to the hooks above the door. I guessed a few banners had been hung in this spot before. “How’s this?”

“Perfect.”

I tied the final knot and descended until I was next to her. Inside the fire station, the women from church were setting up tables and securing plastic tablecloths with tape.

“What goes on in there?” I pointed to the busy women.

Chelsea smiled, pulling her hair off her neck. I wanted to kiss her, but we were surrounded by a conservative audience. “Oh, that’s where they set up the crafts. Blankets, pot holders, Christmas ornaments—you know that kind of thing. I think there’s a raffle for one of those new titanium rods my dad just got in. He donated it. All the money goes to the school.”

I watched the women work. It was familiar. It reminded me I needed to call home and check in on my mom.

“I’ve been eyeing those rods all summer. I think I’ll have to buy a few tickets.”

She released the makeshift ponytail, and her hair layered around her shoulders. Hell, I didn’t care if half of the state watched. I grabbed her around the waist and pulled her into my arms.

“Hey, you two,” Bertie scolded only a few feet away.

Chelsea giggled and looked into my eyes. “Maybe later?”

Begrudgingly, I let my hands fall from her hip and growled. The ladies arranging doilies started to whisper, and I knew it was a battle I had lost.

“Jake, why don’t you help me move some of these boxes?” Bertie struggled with the tailgate.

“Hold on, hold on.” I rushed over to help the older woman. She couldn’t weigh more than ninety pounds.

“I have to get back to the store for the afternoon, but I’ll come by to check on you.” Chelsea laughed as she pulled her bike from the fire station rack. “I think Bertie will keep you busy for a while.”

I loaded my arms with boxes, the contents a mystery, and walked into the station. “See you later, killer.”

***

Hayden Davis strolled next to me and patted me on the back. “Thanks for all of your help yesterday getting the festival set up.” Chelsea’s father spoke over the band playing.

“Sure thing. I didn’t mind.”

I liked the man. I just didn’t like his decisions and how they affected Chelsea. He lived a double life. Part of me realized there were things about us that might not be that different.

Most everyone had gone home mid-afternoon to clean up for the party. There was a popular beach music band, and the street was roped off for dancing. The local crowd was reappearing one by one, freshly showered and wearing their favorite dancing shoes. I felt right at home in my khaki shorts and flip-flops.

“There you are.” Cindy joined us. “I couldn’t get out of the fire station until now. Hi, Jake.” She smiled.

“Hi, ma’am.” I watched as she reached up on her toes to kiss her husband’s cheek.

“Where’s Chelsea?” She peeked around me.

I had been wondering the same thing. “She said she would meet me here.” I glanced at my watch. It was seven thirty. Fifteen minutes past when she agreed to be at the dance. “Maybe I should call her. I’ll be right back.” I left the Davises and walked toward my Jeep.

I had parked in the store’s employee lot so I wouldn’t have to deal with traffic. Although, I had to laugh at myself. Traffic problems on the island consisted of five cars at one stop sign. It was nothing like L.A. or Atlanta traffic.

I pulled on the handle of the passenger side and flipped the latch on the glove box. I liked life without a cell phone in my pocket. Before I could pick up the device, I felt hands slide around my waist. I jumped.

“What the—?” I spun on my heels to find Chelsea wearing a smile and a sundress that showed off her tanned shoulders.

“Scare you?” She giggled.

“What? Me? No way.” I closed the door behind me and the space that separated us. “Come here.”

She lunged into my arms, and I picked her up by the waist, crushing my lips into hers. She tasted like strawberries and smelled like the sweetness of the sun.

She looped her hands around my waist and pressed her forehead to mine. “Sorry I’m so late. I couldn’t decide on what to wear.” I felt her chest rising and falling against me. I loved it when we were close like this.

I lowered her carefully until her flip-flops touched the gravel surface. My finger traced the tiny flowers around the neckline of her dress. I liked the goose bumps I was creating on her skin as I played with the fabric. “This one looks pretty on you.” It took serious restraint not to peel it off her in the back of my Jeep. “I was just getting ready to call you.”

“I sent you a few texts. Why don’t you keep your phone on you?” She placed her hand into my palm as we turned toward the street.

I sighed. “Because sometimes it’s nice to be unavailable.”

“Except when I’m trying to call you to tell you I’m late.” She poked me in the side.

“Yeah, except for that.” I laughed.

The band started another number, and from our vantage point, we could see the festivalgoers pairing off to dance.

“Are you ready to shag?” She looked at me expectantly.

“Uh, darlin’, don’t you think we should be alone for that? Although, don’t get me wrong, I like the way you’re thinking.” We walked closer to the crowd.

She swatted me on the chest. “No. Not that.” She pointed to the dancers. “That’s shagging.”

I watched as the couples shuffled their feet together, and then rocked back on one heel. Some had more pronounced moves, while others seemed content to count out the beat almost at a standstill. It was nothing like the two-step.

I scratched my head. “I don’t know what in the hell they’re doing.”

“I’ve seen you move.” She winked. “Just follow my lead.”

Before I could protest or study the steps, Chelsea tugged me into the center of the street turned dance floor, and locked a firm grip on my hand.

“Ok. It’s easy. Watch my feet. One, two, three, one, two, three, and then rock back. Like this.” She showed me the simple move and paused to let me give it a try.

This was the first time I had been on a dance floor in flip-flops, but was pleasantly surprised that they were perfect for the steps.

“Got it?” Her eyes sparkled as she started her first triple count.

I grinned. “Baby, I was born to shag.” I matched her steps and rocked on my heel as Chelsea’s laughter shot out.

“Please, no more jokes. Shagging is serious.” She zeroed in on my eyes with a mock reprimand.

I pretended to shake the humor from my face. “Like this? All serious?”

She spun under my arm and leaned into the crowd. “Yes. Exactly like that. There’s no laughing in shagging.” She let a giggle slip as I curled my hand around her waist.

The band played until midnight, and we didn’t leave the festival until the last note was launched in the air. I was fairly certain I had danced with every woman who lived on Brees Island and a few who didn’t. I also had the chance to show off my two-step, even though I knew this crowd was partial to their beach music. I didn’t know if I had ever laughed so hard or danced so much.

I draped my arm around Chelsea’s shoulder as we headed to the parking lot, my legs slightly achy from four hours of dancing.

“Did you have a good time?” She smiled at me.

“The best.” I kissed her on the forehead as I shuttled her into the Jeep.

“Wait. What about my car?” She looked over her shoulder at her parking spot.

“Oh, we don’t have time for that.”

“We don’t?” I loved the puzzled look on her face.

“No. I’ve got to get you home.” I jumped into the driver’s seat, cranked the engine, and peeled out of the lot, spewing gravel in all directions. I loved dancing with her all night, but I couldn’t wait to hold her in my arms and dance a little more where no one else could watch.

***

Had it really been five weeks since I started working at the store? I wasn’t keeping track, but Chelsea had mentioned it in passing. I knew girls didn’t drop hints like that for nothing. It was some kind of milestone. She was coming over for dinner tonight, and I knew I needed to do something special to commemorate five weeks together, but hell if I knew what that would be. Flowers? No, that seemed too cliché. Wine and candles? No, we had done that.

If we were in L.A., I would take her to a five-star restaurant that overlooked the canyons. In Atlanta, we could go somewhere and listen to a cool indie band. She would love all the music. More than anything, I wanted to take her to my ranch in Texas, but all three of those ideas weren’t options tonight. I needed to think of something creative, something romantic, something that would make her smile, and something I could come up with within the hour before she arrived.

I lifted the screen on my laptop. After one of my calls with Rick two weeks ago, I realized if I was going to send out an email, I would have to find a computer on the island. I broke down, ordered one that night on my phone, and had it express shipped. More surprising than being connected to the world again was that Carl and Flora had wireless at the campground. Flora told me they had too many visitors who complained without it. It wasn’t worth the hassle to argue with them about the benefits of going internet-free. Carl had the wireless installed last summer.

I typed in “romantic date ideas” and waited for the search results to pop up. I took a sip of beer and skimmed the first few articles on the screen. Everything was the same old standard stuff: dinner, movie, flowers, champagne, bubble bath. I placed the bottle on the table. One item on the list had merit. I checked the time. I didn’t know if I would be able to pull it off, but I would try. For a pretty girl with blue eyes, I would try.

CHAPTER THIRTY

Chelsea

I looked at the copy of the email I had printed out and folded in half. The edge was peeking out of my purse. I was nervous, over-the-top nervous, and excited. I had been waiting for this day since graduation.

Out of nowhere, all of a sudden, Blue Steel Records emailed me. I repressed the burst of squeals that kept bubbling to the surface.

I had made it almost to the end of the summer without hearing from a single one of my inquiries, but the persistence had paid off. I didn’t have any details or any more information other than what was in the email. They wanted to set up a call with me tomorrow afternoon to talk about a three-song contract. Three whole songs. This was everything I had waited and worked for. At four o’clock tomorrow, I would be on the phone with the label, securing my place in music history.

Jake was going to be the first to hear the news. I knew he would help me figure the rest out—he always did.

I pulled into Brees Campground and slowed the car to a snail’s pace. There were children playing near one of the tents, still in their swimsuits. I remembered those days when I would spend the entire day at the beach building sandcastles with my mom. It was a great way to grow up. But with one little email, life was sending me in another direction—far from the beach and sandcastles.

I parked next to Jake’s Jeep. Before I had a chance to step out of the car, he had already opened the back door and grabbed my overnight bag.

I laughed. “Ready for a sleepover?” I closed the door behind me, and his free arm encircled my waist.

“You have no idea.”

Technically, we met seven weeks ago. We had talked about the morning Jake first visited the store and laughed at the memory. But we both knew the moment things changed between us was the night of my first visit to Silver Sand Dollar. The night after we dunked each other in the creek, the night he kissed me in the dark. I knew it was exactly five weeks ago. A girl didn’t forget a night like that.

“Are we having cowboy steak for dinner?” I looked at the fire. He had loaded it with driftwood.

“Actually, no. I picked up take out from Sailors on the way home. I thought we could take it easy tonight.” He stepped into the camper with my bag and emerged with a glass of wine.

“You serve wine now?” I smiled and took a sip.

“Yep. I serve anything you like.” He brushed my hair away from my neck and kissed my shoulder.

I loved how he was so comfortable with me. Kissing me when and where he wanted, touching me because he couldn’t keep his hands off. As if I belonged to him. It made me feel wanted. His confidence was contagious. It always brought out my bolder side.

“I have news.” I tried to steady my voice as I followed him to the fire.

“You do? What is it?” He raised his eyebrows as he looked at me.

“I got a contract!” I finally squealed. “I just read the email before I came over.”

“Congratulations. That’s awesome.” He wrapped me in a hug and kissed my forehead. “That’s really great.”

I inhaled the hug, feeling the warmth in his arms. This moment felt surreal.

“I knew someone was going to pick up your songs. You’re a natural.” He beamed.

“I’m really excited. They asked me to call in tomorrow at four to go over the details. I don’t think I can wait that long.” I bit my lip.

“Darlin’, it’s not that far away.”

“But, I’m so nervous and what if I screw it up? What if I say the wrong thing? I’ve never had a contract call before. You know, I don’t even know what three songs they are interested in. I’ve sent so many, I’ve lost track which label has which song.” I downed the rest of the wine in my glass and handed it to Jake.

He placed it on the table. “You aren’t going to screw it up. We can talk about it and figure out what makes sense for you before you get on the phone.” His eyes flickered from the firelight.

“Really?”

He shook his head.

“Ok, ok, that sounds good.” The offer was a relief. I had no idea how to approach a business call. The music came naturally, but all the rest was like sailing without a map. I paced in front of the fire, all the questions about tomorrow’s call swirled in my head.

“Are you going to sit?” He watched me circle the chairs.

“I can’t. I’m too nervous. I was fine, and then I started thinking about it and I’m—”

Jake stood from the chair, tucked one arm under my knees, and lifted me against his chest.

“What are you doing?” I searched his face for an answer, but he ignored the question and headed straight for the Sand Dollar door.

He slammed it behind him with his foot and released me from his hold, only to press me against the closest wall. His hands tangled in my hair, his mouth hot against mine.

I groaned as he pushed my thin shirt up, and his fingers slid under the lacy edge of my bra. I had seen bedroom eyes before, but the look he gave made my legs feel shaky. These were I’m-taking-you-up-against-the-wall eyes. If he didn’t keep me pressed against the there, I would fall into a heap on the floor. His lips were firm against my neck as he trailed along my collarbone.

“Tell me,” he growled.

I knew what he wanted to hear, but I just wanted him to do it. Make me feel alive, consume every part of me.

He pinned my wrists above my head, slamming them against the wall. “Tell me, what you want me to do.” His other hand rolled over my nipple, and I bowed from the wall, wanting to absorb the intensity.

“Fuck me,” I breathed in his ear.

“Here?” He pressed his waist against me, and I could feel his hard erection against my leg. I loved it.

“Yes.” I nodded. “Right here.” Was that my sexy and seductive voice, begging him to fuck me against the wall?

“I want you so much.” He groaned as if I was the one torturing him, not the other way around.

His mouth descended on mine as he released the button on my shorts. I wiggled until they were touching the tops of my feet, where I could kick them away.

He freed my hands only for a hurried second to slide the tank top off my body and toss it to the floor. A devilish grin spread across his face before pinning me where he wanted me again.

“You know I love your body,” he growled as he kissed the top of my breast.

I turned my head to the side, trying to steady myself, but I felt as if I was melting into the wall with each lash of his tongue. He pulled the lace over each nipple so that they were exposed, ready for him. His tongue circled one, and then the other. Each lick shot heat between my legs. I arched into the wall, jutting forward and giving more to him as he sucked and bit against the sensitive skin.

There was no thinking, only bursts of heat and want. Behind the darkness, I drifted into his hands, into his control. He nudged my wrists higher against the wall, reached below, and unfastened his shorts. A powerful tug brought my thigh around his waist, securing my heel against his backside.

He smiled as his lips came within a breath’s reach of mine.

I tried to keep the whimpers at the back of my throat. If he didn’t take me now, I would scream. Scream for him to possess me. Fill me.

As if he knew he had pushed me as far as I could go, he shifted, nudging my legs to spread for him. A ragged moan escaped my lips as I waited for him.

“Please,” I whimpered. My eyes begged him to devour me.

“You’re so damn beautiful,” he growled.

Gripping my ass hard, he thrust into me with a strong stroke.

“Oh shit,” I hissed.

His breath on my neck was hot and rapid as he pumped in and out of me. I tightened and clenched around him every time he rocked deeper, matching his intensity with my own. Damn, he felt amazing. Slight trembles split through me. I knew I was at the boundary of spiraling over the edge. The boundary that would make me quiver and scream until I couldn’t feel my toes.

My head rolled back, and I tried to steady my breathing, begging my body to calm the swells deep in my belly. It had to last longer. I wanted him like this all night.

“No,” he whispered. “Look at me.” It was a demand.

My eyes fluttered open, and I witnessed pure and total desire in his gaze as he buried himself in me hard and strong. With his arms wrapped around my waist, I snaked my hands against his neck and held on for dear life while I came fiercely in his grasp, wave after wave. Our eyes locked as he squeezed me tighter in his embrace and let the release bring us to our knees.

“Oh my God, Chelsea.” He breathed heavily in my ear. We draped across the floor, unable to move, a tangled web of bodies entwined.

I exhaled, running my fingers through his hair. My body had never felt so exquisite—damp, warm, tender in the spots he had touched. His—I felt like I was his. I always did after we had sex.

He kissed my shoulder and struggled to prop himself up. “Feel better? Did that clear your head?”

“Is that what that was about? You did it to distract me?”

He chuckled.

“And I just thought you were excited about the sleepover.” I giggled at him. He looked cute like this—his face flushed, his body relaxed.

He reached over my head and snagged a piece of paper off the table. He held it out to me.

“What’s this?” It was dark. I could barely make out the words.

“In honor of hanging out for five weeks, I wrote something for you. It came to me all of a sudden.” He smiled, showing his white teeth.

I couldn’t believe it. He had never shown me any of his writing even though I had begged for weeks to read a chapter from his book. I held the page forward, catching the crack of light from the window.

It would be easier if

You didn’t taste so sweet

If kissing you didn’t make me whole

My world wouldn’t be right if we didn’t meet

It’s like you looked at me and stole

My breath, my heart, and I’m in deep

It would be easier if

I didn’t crave your lips

If your warmth in my bed

Didn’t take me on a summer trip

This is something I’ve never said

But, baby, you saved me

“So? What do you think?” He was on one elbow, waiting for me to say something, but I didn’t know how to respond. What do you say when everything you’ve wanted to hear is written on a piece of paper? It was beautiful, simple, and perfect.

“I love it. I think it’s amazing.” I reached toward him, crushing his lips against mine. If he never said it out loud, it was ok. I knew he loved me. It was all in the words. “But I didn’t get anything for you. Was I supposed to?”

Jake laughed. I didn’t know what he thought was so funny. “No, darlin’, not at all. Lying here with you on the floor is all I need.”

“Good.” I crawled toward him, hovering over his chest. “But I think I know something you might like.” I kissed his neck. “Think you’re up for it?” My teeth grazed against his collarbone.

I loved the smile on his lips.

“Baby, I’m up for anything you have planned.” He settled onto the floor, and I did my best to show him that the past five weeks were the hottest, most amazing weeks of my life.

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

Ben

I groaned at the sound of the crickets. First my phone and then Chelsea’s chirped with the morning alarm. It was dark, and I heard the rain pelting the aluminum roof. A man couldn’t possibly get out of bed with that perfect symphony tapping overhead.

A low rumble of thunder echoed, and she snuggled under my arm, radiating warmth against my bare chest. I pulled her against me. There was no way we were going into work at five thirty. I fished for the phones and silenced them, powering each one off. To hell with Hayden Davis if he had a problem with it.

Other than the hurricane, we never slept in together. Today was an exception. The store could take care of itself. I wanted to hide under the covers all morning with Chelsea and listen to the rainfall. I needed this.I needed her in my arms.

***

“I’m going to be in so much trouble. I can’t believe you turned our phones off.” Chelsea bent next to the bed to collect the lacy lingerie set I had peeled off her body last night.

“Do you ever call in sick? Have I ever called in sick?” I teased. I could tell she was annoyed, but I didn’t regret it for one second.

“That’s not the point.” She turned for the bathroom. “My father probably used to like you. Now, you’re done.” She closed the door behind her, and I laughed.

“I’ll take full responsibility. Ok?” I called to her through the flimsy door. The sink was running. I wasn’t sure she could hear me.

She slid the door open. “What are you going to say? That I stayed over here last night? Uh-uh. No way.” She closed the door. “You do not understand.”

I strolled to the hall and leaned against the opposite wall so I didn’t have to speak as loudly. “You don’t think he knows about us? Come on, Chelsea. We’re adults. We can do whatever we want. Who cares what your dad thinks?”

The water stopped and the door moved to the side. She clutched her toothbrush firmly in her hand. “I care. I don’t want him to think I’m anything like him.” Her eyes hit the floor, and I recognized the look when she was trying to push tears away.

I had never considered she would connect our relationship to her father’s affair. It wasn’t bad; it didn’t hurt people. Was it because we weren’t married? Sure, we were in a conservative part of the South, but Chelsea wasn’t close-minded. She had been to a liberal arts college, had relationships, slept with other guys—as much as I hated to think about that part.

I tried to gauge where all of this was coming from. “You know what we have isn’t in any way like some secret affair, right? We can be together, go out. There are no other people. There is nothing wrong with what is happening between us.”

She put her toothbrush back in the holder and turned to face me. “I didn’t mean for that to sound like it did. Of course, I don’t think there is anything wrong about us. I love being with you. I loved last night.” She smiled. “But my parents have preached waiting for sex until marriage since the day my mother gave the birds and the bees talk. As far as they know, I’m as virginally white as it comes. I’ve never let them think otherwise. When he finds out, my father is going to think of me the same way I think of him. Like I’ve done something bad.” She paused. “And he’s going to hate you for corrupting me.”

I arched my eyebrow. If we weren’t in the middle of such a serious discussion, I would throw out a joke about how there was no way I was the corruptor in this scenario, but that was better left alone.

“Then, that’s his own damn fault for not knowing what’s right and wrong.” I reached for her waist. “Because, this is about damn near perfect.” I kissed her lips, tasting the fresh mint on her mouth. “Don’t let him make you feel guilty about us.”

“I don’t have one ounce of guilt about you. This has been the best summer of my life.” I loved when her blue eyes lit up like this. “But part of me still doesn’t want to disappoint them. Is that stupid?”

“It’s not stupid at all.” At twenty-eight, I was still doing things to get my dad’s attention. Hoping the next movie would elicit some kind of praise or compliment. Where my mother was concerned, I didn’t want to embarrass her or cause her any pain. It wasn’t stupid. Chelsea loved her parents, faults, sins, and all. It wasn’t something you outgrew.

“But, at some point, they have to recognize you as an adult. And you can’t feel guilty about it.” I kissed her on the forehead before walking to the bedroom. My extra towels were in a drawer at the end of the bed.

“That’s easy for you to say. Your father isn’t having an affair and getting ready to find out you’re sleeping with the clerk you hired.” Her eyes closed and she leaned against the door. “This day is going to be a freakin’ disaster.”

“Did you already forget about your call this afternoon? It can’t be a bad day.” I grabbed one red and one white towel.

“How can I forget that? I woke up thinking about Austin.”

I was glad she was so excited about the call. Blue Steel Records was owned by one of the wide receivers I played with in college. Brandon was a good guy; he would watch out for her.

I threw a towel at her. “Here.”

She tilted her head to side. “What’s this?”

“Get in the shower. Now.” I stood, towering over her.

“Oh no. There’s no way we’ll both fit. You can barely get in there.” Her head shook.

“Darlin’, we will fit.” I turned the knob on the hot water side. “But we only have seven minutes for me to wash all these problems away for you, so stop arguing with me and get in.” My eyes darted to the stream of water sputtering behind her. For a second, I thought she might not take me up on my offer. I considered lifting her up and putting her under the water, but before I could act on it, she tugged the tank top off her chest, shimmied out of something silky and blue, and stepped into the shower.

“Damn, girl,” I muttered, bracing myself against the wall. Maybe she thought I did all these things to make her feel better, to erase her doubts and fears, but she didn’t know that making her smile turned my world right side up.

***

“Mr. Owen, sir. I’m really sorry Chelsea and I weren’t here to help Bertie open the store this morning.” I folded my hands behind my back and waited for the store owner to give it to me. I was prepared.

Hayden stayed seated in the cramped office. “Son, I have brought you into my business. Cindy and I had you over for dinner.” He cleared his throat. “And I’m having a real hard time right now listening to this.”

I realized this wasn’t the most comfortable conversation between two men. If I ever had a daughter, I knew I would be the kind of dad who eagle-eyed any boy who stepped within ten feet of her. Regardless of the situation with Eileen Meeks, I did feel for the guy sitting behind the desk. This was damn awkward.

“I know. I know. And I appreciate everything, sir. I did not intend to keep Chelsea from work. It won’t happen again.”

“Fell asleep watching a movie and you both forgot to charge your phones?” the father asked skeptically.

We both knew that wasn’t the entire story, but I was sticking to it. We could all pretend that’s what happened and maybe the consequences for Chelsea wouldn’t be so bad. I had volunteered to face the firing squad to spare her the embarrassment.

“Yes, sir. It was irresponsible on my part.” I hoped we could drop the details, and Hayden would let me get back to the kayaks and snorkel sets.

“All right, let’s just leave it at that.” He cleared his throat. “If it happens again, you won’t get a warning.”

I nodded. “Yes, sir. Understood. It won’t.” I turned for the door, anxious to end the conversation. I’d had knock-down, drag-out arguments with directors that were easier to deal with than the tension in this office. I closed the door behind me and strolled out to the docks.

A grandfather was teaching his grandson how to pin fish at the edge of the pier. The clouds had dispersed, and there were patches of sunlight peeping through.

I chuckled as I took my station in the rental stand. I hadn’t felt that much like a teenager since I was one. It was downright hilarious that I had almost gotten an ass-chewing from an overprotective father. Now that was a headline Celebrity Watch should run: World’s Most Eligible Bachelor Sent to Time Out. I flipped through the checklist on the clipboard and counted how many pieces of equipment were out on the water.

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

Chelsea

“Wish me luck.” I clutched my phone in my right hand, and waited for Jake to say something calming.

“Good luck, pretty girl.” He winked. “Just remember, don’t agree to anything until they send over a copy of the contract and we read through it. I don’t want them to take advantage of you because it’s your first deal.”

He wouldn’t open up about his book contract, but he spoke with such passion, I could only assume he had a bad experience with contracts. The advice was good. I needed it. No reason to jump into anything before I had time to think through the offer.

“I’m so nervous.” My knees might actually knock together I was shaking so much.

He held me by the shoulders. “They already love your music. You are the ones with all the cards here.”

“Right. Right.” I bit my bottom lip. Jake’s eyes drifted over my shoulder.

“Hey, what’s going on at The Carribe Inn?” He pointed toward the hotel across the street.

I pivoted on my heels and caught a glimpse of a large group climbing the stairs of the historic building. It looked like there were photographers following the party into the lobby.

“I have no idea. But Bertie would know. She knows everything.” I turned back, needing reassurance from his eyes. They were always so soothing when I got worked up.

He patted me on the backside, followed by a tight squeeze. “Go get ‘em. It’s four.” He spun me out of the rental entrance. It would be silly to ask him to make the call with me, but part of me wanted him close by.

This was more nerve-wracking than my first day of classes at Carolina when I didn’t know a single soul, or the last day of grad school when my future became a black hole of uncertainty.

I forced a smile as I walked to the parking lot. Wasn’t there a saying about smiling on the phone? I couldn’t think of it, but knew it mattered. It was stuffy inside my car. I turned the AC to high, hoping it would cool quickly. There was no privacy in the store, and after my late-morning stunt, there wasn’t any way I could take off early. A call in the seclusion of my car was the best I could work out.

The number for Blue Steel was in my back pocket. I pulled out the email, read the numbers aloud, and tapped the digits into my phone.

“Blue Steel Records. How may I direct your call?” a woman answered.

“Hi, this is Chelsea Davis. I have a conference call with Brandon Edwards.” My stomach flipped with butterflies. This was actually happening.

“Yes, it looks like you’re on the call schedule. Hold please.”

I didn’t know if I was breathing in or out. My chest was so tight, it might have forgotten what it was supposed to do.

“Chelsea! Great to have you on the line.” A booming voice sounded in my ear. “This is Brandon.”

“Mr. Edwards, thank you so much. I couldn’t believe it when I got your email yesterday.” I hoped I sounded like a professional.

“Call me Brandon.”

“Ok. Brandon.” This time I had a genuine smile. I couldn’t help but think parts of his words reminded me of Jake’s accent. They were both from Texas.

“Let’s talk a minute. Looks like we have three songs of yours, and I have an artist in mind who could cut them.”

My heart stopped. “Really?” I thought we were going to discuss them taking the songs on and shopping around for someone to record or demo. It never occurred to me there would be someone lined up already.

“Have you ever heard of Quinn Jansen?”

“Oh my God!” I covered my mouth. All the prepping in the world couldn’t contain my excitement. It sputtered out. Ever since Quinn had made a few YouTube videos that went viral overnight, people were clamoring for anything she could produce. This was unreal.

“So, I take that as a yes?” Brandon chuckled a deep, warm laugh on the other end.

“I’m sorry. You caught me by surprise. Yes, that is a yes. I know who she is.” I noticed that the crowd from The Inn had gathered again. They were crossing the street.

“Good. I think she’ll be the perfect fit for your songs. You’re both young and have that vibe that people really want right now.”

Why were there people taking pictures? The crowd was distracting. Great, they were headed into the store. I would have to wrap the call up quickly, and get back inside before Bertie ratted me out. I could only barter for so much time away from the register.

“Chelsea, you there?”

“Yes, I’m sorry. I’m here.” I shifted in my seat, turning from the scene in front of the store. “I am absolutely blown away. Quinn Jansen is amazing. I think she’d be perfect for my songs. I just can’t believe she’d want to record something of mine.” Quinn was known for her indie roots, but this seemed too good to be true.

“Why wouldn’t she? She’s friends with Ben too.”

I didn’t want to sound like any more of a rookie than I already had, but I didn’t know who Ben was. Maybe a producer.

“When Ben’s agent called and said he wanted us to take a look at your material, it was a no brainer. Ben and I go way back. Played football together in college, but I’m sure he’s mentioned that to you.”

I shook my head. “Mr.—” I corrected myself, “Brandon. I don’t know a Ben.” This was embarrassing. He was probably an important and influential music maker, and I had to admit to the head of Blue Steel Records I had never heard of him.

“Ben Baldwin? Tall guy? Makes all the ladies swoon? He’s got a Texas accent—likes cold beer? You don’t know the movie star, Ben Baldwin?”

I slumped into the seat, my body stiff with fear. Or was it shock? Whatever it was, it made me shake and my stomach spasm. This didn’t make sense. Brandon Edwards could not possibly be telling me that I knew Ben Baldwin. That wasn’t possible. The tall, heart-melting Texan I knew was named Jake.

“I-I don’t know.” It was the best I could muster considering the panic gripping me.

“Listen, Chelsea. I have another call coming in. I hate to cut this short, but I’ll have my assistant email over the contracts. Take a few days, look everything over, and then we can set up a time to talk again. Sound good?”

I nodded, forgetting he needed audibles on the phone.

“Tell Ben I said howdy, and I’m looking forward to grabbing a beer with him when he gets back from vacation. Son of a bitch has been gone all summer.”

Before I could put together a reasonable response or even better, a question, Brandon hung up. I looked at the phone, now dark.

There had to be an explanation. There was some sort of mix-up or funny coincidence. Jake would probably laugh at me when I told him Brandon thought they played football together.

Then I remembered when Jake told me about his concussions. About how he stopped playing, because he was worried it would do more harm to his body as he got older. My mouth went dry.

The beer? Jake loved his Texas beer, but any guy from Texas loved that stuff, right? It didn’t mean anything. Just because I went to Carolina didn’t mean I was the only girl who loved Moscato. That was a ridiculous assumption.

Flashes of Jake scattered through my mind. He used to wear a hat pulled over his eyes and dark sunglasses, and he went through a scruffy bearded phase, which didn’t seem to match the guy I knew now. Little by little his Texas accent appeared, and he called me darlin’—something I didn’t hear him say in the beginning. At that time, I dismissed it. But, could I dismiss all those things together?

It hurt to breathe.

My breaths were shallower. Even with the AC running, the air in the car felt stagnate. Oh my God, I might throw up right in the car. I reached for the handle, not knowing if I needed the humid August air or just something to keep me from falling into the blackness that engulfed me. I staggered to my feet and pointed my body in the direction of the rental stand. Jake would be there. He could fix this. He could explain. I took a step forward when, out of nowhere, the flashes started and someone shoved a microphone in my face.

“Are you responsible for the breakup of Rebecca Campbell and Ben Baldwin?” the first voice shouted.

I turned before the next question.

“Did you know he and Rebecca were still dating when you hit on him?”

“What do you do for a living?”

“Would you like to make an official statement?”

“What’s your favorite thing about Ben?”

I couldn’t catch my bearings. Everything heaved and rocked as if I was clinging to a raft in the middle of a sea storm. I tried to push past them, but the circle was tight and I didn’t know which way was the best escape.

There were more questions.

“Tell us what it feels like to stab America’s sweetheart in the back.”

“Do your parents live here?”

“Is it true you used to date a surfer?”

I grabbed the sides of my head, begging the questions to stop. It was like being swarmed by angry bees. Some stings hurt worse than others, but they were all public and all intensely confusing, leaving open wounds for the world to see.

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

Ben

Bertie had called me inside to help her unload a box of Frisbees and a few cases of sunscreen. Sometimes I thought the woman just didn’t like being alone in the store. Chelsea had barely been gone thirty seconds before I got paged for manual labor.

“Only these four boxes?” I called to Bertie, but she didn’t answer. I ripped open the tape and lined them on the floor so she wouldn’t have to strain with the awkward sizes.

“Jake! Jake! You’ve got to come see this. Hurry up.” I heard her shrill voice at the front of the store.

“What is going on, Bertie?” I dropped the last box and headed to the register.

I stared in horror through the window.

There weren’t words. There weren’t thoughts, just complete panic and nausea. Rebecca was climbing the steps of Davis General Store.

Her long blond hair cascaded around her shoulders. She was followed by her entourage and a slew of reporters. Shit. Damn it. Fuck. Fuck.

“Jake, I think it’s a celebrity. Wait, I know her. It’s Rebecca Campbell,” Bertie squealed. “What do you think she’s doing here? Oh my Lord, how does my hair look?” She patted the white curls above her ears.

How in the hell did she find me? I scanned the porch. Becs hadn’t spotted me. If I ran out of the back, I could probably avoid her. But then what? Was I going to keep running? Keep pretending that I wasn’t a star? Pretend that if I went anywhere else on the planet I wouldn’t be besieged by fans?

I inhaled sharply and did the only thing I could do—meet Rebecca head on.

I pulled on the glass door, inviting a blast of hot air into the store.

“Ben. Oh my God, Ben.” She wrapped her hands around my neck and buried her head against my chest. I heard the camera clicks before I had a chance to catch my balance from her embrace. The scent of her familiar French perfume invaded my nostrils.

“Rebecca, what are you doing here?” I pushed her off and away. The few reporters who were observing the exchange crowded closer. “Wait, don’t say anything. Let’s go somewhere private.”

I put an arm around her shoulder to shuttle her inside, but she dug her designer heels into the floorboards.

“No, Ben. I’ve been searching for you for weeks. Please don’t make me move a single inch. I need to just look at you—make sure it’s really you.” She advanced toward me again. “I missed you so much.”

“Ben, is it true you dumped Rebecca?” One of the reporters asked.

“Do you miss her?”

“Does this mean you two are back together?”

The questions came in rapid succession. Becs spun toward the cameras, smiling sweetly. “I’m sure you can all understand how special and precious this moment is to us. We’ll take just a few questions, ok?”

Stepping onto that porch, I had stepped onto a landmine. Mini-bombs that exploded with each question, with each bat of Rebecca’s eyelashes. This entire reunion was an orchestrated ambush. I slid my hands in my pockets and looked at the floor.

“I’m sorry, everyone. Rebecca can take questions, but I’m not making any statements right now.” I smiled widely. “But, I know a great little seafood restaurant y’all might want to try—”

Before I could finish my attempt to derail the media inquiries, another reporter ran from the employee parking lot. “She’s over here! We found the other woman!”

The photographers scurried down the stairs. I froze, trying to sort through what that even meant.

Other woman? What the fuck?

Son of a bitch. I jumped the railing and sprinted to the parking lot.

What I saw tore my heart in two.

“Back off!” I roared as I ran into the center of the circle, pushing bodies out of the way. I had to get there, had to control it. Chelsea was hunched next to her car, her hands over her head.

I scooped her up. She didn’t protest, or if she did, I couldn’t hear over the crowd. My Jeep was at the edge of the lot. I placed her in the passenger seat and sped onto the island road. If I thought I was in a fishbowl before, I was wrong. This was a fishbowl. There was nowhere to go on the island where we wouldn’t be found. It was too small. There weren’t enough roads or exits. There were no gated security systems, and no rock-solid bodyguards. Damn it.

I drove a mile, trying to put some distance between us and the paparazzi nightmare that had invaded our perfect summer dream. I clutched Chelsea’s hand, squeezing it tightly into my palm, but she stared straight ahead as if I wasn’t there.

What had I done? I looked at her, terrified and pale. Right now, I just had to protect her—do what I should have done in the first place. I reached for my phone and scrolled until I found Derek’s number.

“Hey, man. I have an emergency.” I spoke quickly.

“Yeah, yeah. What is it? Waves?”

“Do you think you could call Paul? Meet us at his place?”

Derek paused. “Sure, but what’s going on?”

“Don’t talk to anyone. Meet me there in five minutes and come alone. Understand?” I glanced at Chelsea, her blue eyes closed off from me. “This is serious.”

“Got it, man. See ya.” Derek hung up.

I steered straight and turned at the next road. Paul McIntire had the only house on the island that I knew of with gates. It might be the only place where I could keep Chelsea guarded against the press. They would find her, but she would be safe.

I pulled into the driveway and parked behind a large oleander bush. Until I talked to Paul, I wouldn’t be able to close the gates. I would have to wait for Derek too.

“Chelsea, I’m going to fix this,” I whispered. “I won’t let them hurt you.”

She turned toward me, her hands steady in her lap. Her eyes looked at me, but the light was gone. I felt the pain of what I had done like a knife twisting between my ribs. I was the man who had put out the glow. There was nothing there but cold.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

Chelsea

Everything felt numb, like when your hand falls asleep, and it hurts when you attempt to shift it. If I tried to move at all, my body seized with the pain of waking up, one piercing, burning twist at a time.

“Here you go. Paul made you one of those fruity drinks you like so much.” Derek shoved a cup into my hand. “Just drink.”

I sipped, but my eyes wouldn’t break with the ocean. There were five boats on the horizon, zipping by on their way into the marina before the sun went down. No, there were six.

“So, this seems like a lot to take in.” Derek sat next to me. “Who would have thought all this time that we were hanging out with a movie star? Wild, huh?” He tipped his drink back, and looked over his shoulder and into the massive McIntire residence.

Paul and Jake were inside talking, presumably about security measures that needed to be taken. My stomach twisted. He wasn’t Jake. He was Ben Baldwin.

“Did he tell you anything? Did you seriously have no idea who he was?” Derek asked. “No clue?”

I tilted my head toward him, feeling the sting of the motion.

“Ok. I’m going to guess that means no.” He slid his hand along my back. It was an attempt to comfort me, but I didn’t want anyone to touch me. I shirked from the contact.

“Please don’t, Der.”

I kicked the cup back and let the coconut mixture slide down my throat. I didn’t want to get lost in the bottom of a cup. I didn’t want the pina colada to be the relief that quieted the pain. That was for people who drowned their sorrows in alcohol. That was for people who had been dumped or were left broken-hearted. I wasn’t one of those people. My heart wasn’t broken. No, it just wasn’t beating.

“I know I’ve been a real dick this summer, Chelsea. But I am here for you. I don’t really have any clue what’s going on, no clue, but I’m here if you need me.” He stood as Paul and Ben walked on the deck.

Ben strolled to the chaise lounge where I was propped against a pile of tropical-colored pillows. He had deposited me there before gathering the guys for a talk. “Derek, man, thanks for everything.”

“No problem. I’m happy to help.” He slapped Ben on the back.

Ben crouched down, eye-level with me. “I have to go back into town. If I don’t make some kind of statement, they’ll never leave.”

I refused to look at him—whoever he was.

“Paul said you can stay here as long as we need, and Derek is going to stay too while I’m gone.” He moved to kiss my forehead, but I flinched at the gesture.

“Go.”

“I’ll be back tonight and we can talk.” His voice was soft.

Derek and Paul made a beeline for the living room.

“I don’t want to talk,” I answered.

Ben sighed. “I did this. I did all of it. I know I did.”

“Stop.”

The pain in his eyes caught my breath for a second, but I powered through, turning my attention back to how many boats I could count on the horizon. “Go. And do not come back here.”

He pushed against the chair and stood next to me.

“I swear, Chelsea, I didn’t want you to get hurt.”

The pain turned to something more intense and more physical. I screamed at the top of my lungs. “Didn’t you hear me? Get out of here.”

Ben turned on his heels and walked down the side steps.

My body lunged backward into the pillows. Seven, no maybe that was the eighth boat. I was going to have to start all over again. Damn him.

***

This might be the first time I had turned on the TV all summer. Other than a little hurricane coverage, I didn’t have time and not a whole lot of interest. I read. I wrote music. I loved Jake all summer. Who had time for TV?

I tapped the volume control so I could hear what was being said about him, about me.

It was all surreal. Ever since yesterday afternoon, my life had been sucked into a paparazzi vortex. They had dug up dirt on me I didn’t even know I had. It didn’t help that Rebecca Campbell was determined to stick around and spin her story. I realized though that Rebecca might be telling the truth. I might actually be the other woman in this twisted scenario. How could I tell what was right and true anymore when my compass had been smashed into a million pieces?

Derek walked into the living room and slumped into the open space on the couch next to me. He had spent the night in one of the many bedrooms.

“You don’t want to watch this trash, do you?” He tried to take the remote from me.

“Actually, I do. Did you know that I slept with a married professor?” My eyes hardened.

“None of the things they are saying about you or J—Ben are true. The people who know and love you know the truth. Let’s watch a movie or something.”

I laughed at the irony. If I had watched more movies, maybe none of this would have happened. What dingbat doesn’t know she’s sleeping with the World’s Sexiest Bachelor? That’s what the headline said—he was the most wanted and adored man on the planet. I clutched the remote.

“Hey, easy tiger. Paul’s parents are pretty generous, but we don’t need to buy a new remote.” He took it from my grasp and turned the TV off before I could get the daily entertainment rundown.

“Der, I want to watch it.”

“No, you don’t. You’re sitting in here, beating yourself up for something that isn’t your fault. None of us knew who he was.” He turned me to face him. “He didn’t want us to know, Chelsea. Look at what happened. It’s a circus at the store, all the local press is here, people are camped out at The Carribe Inn of all places. It’s crazy. He was right. There was no reason to subject anyone to this. I have a whole new appreciation for celebrities.” He whistled.

“Did you just say he was right?” I had hit Derek once before and that was a moment I regretted, but the urge was itching in my palm.

“I know you’re pissed. I’m not telling you it isn’t justified. But, he’s doing everything he can to fix it.”

“How do you fix something like this, Der? He lied. He fucking lied to me all damn summer!” I felt my hands tremble. “Everything, the record label was him pulling strings with friends, the book—he’s not a fucking writer! Did he just say that to get in my pants? Is that all guys care about?” I picked up a pillow and threw it against the sliding glass door.

“I’m glad that wasn’t something breakable.” Derek looked at the pillow and then at me. “What Ben did was shitty, but he’s not a bad guy. It doesn’t take five minutes around him to know that.” He stood. “And no, guys care about more than getting in a girl’s pants.” He winked. “Sometimes.”

I grabbed the other pillow and threw it at his chest. “Not funny.”

“Oh, I’m hilarious. You’ve just forgotten.”

There was quite possibly a smile forming at the corners of my mouth, but I was reluctant to give in to it. It felt better to let the misery and hurt consume me. It kept the memories of Ben farther away. The memories of his mouth, the way he growled in my ear, the way his skin felt pressed against mine, how he could calm me down with his arms around me. No, those memories weren’t welcome here and neither was Ben Baldwin.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

Ben

“Rick, man where have you been? I’ve been calling you for twenty-four hours.” I breathed into the phone. If there was ever a time I needed Rick, it was now.

“Hey. I’ve been doing a little traveling.”

“Traveling? Ok. Well, have you seen the news? I don’t know how, but Rebecca found me. Everything has gone to hell. What can you do about her?” I waited anxiously for him to give me good news.

“Ben, Ben, I think we have a bad connection. Let me try you back.”

“Rick—” I huffed as the call ended.

Damn it. I threw the phone across the table, and it skidded into the red vinyl cushion.

Nothing was working out. Damage control was not my strong suit. I was the charmer. I had tried smiling and joking my way through the questions, but the reporters were after more than my usual one-liners.

I slid into the booth. What I couldn’t figure out was how Rebecca tracked me down. I had been careful. None of the locals seemed to notice me anymore. I had blended in like one of them. It didn’t make any sense. The bigger puzzle was why. Why was she after me like this?

My reflection looked rough. I didn’t sleep much last night, and I hadn’t shaved or taken a shower. I reached for the hot water knob and grimaced, thinking that just yesterday I had been in here with Chelsea. The water falling over her smooth skin, her body wet and warm under mine. I punched the wall.

What kind of an asshole does what I did? I had more than one chance to tell her my name, what I did for a living, that I was trying to run from it and chase a new life. The excuses I had created were stupid, so stupid. Why couldn’t I have seen that before it blew up like this?

If anyone could understand, it would have been her. It should have been her if I had just given her the chance.

I rinsed the soap off my chest, turned the water off, and grabbed a towel. Chelsea’s was still hanging next to mine.

I hadn’t bothered calling the store this morning about work. With the firestorm of reporters, I didn’t think Hayden would be looking for me to show, but I was going to have a talk with him. Just not today. I couldn’t take it today.

I reached in the fridge for a beer, but left it on the shelf. It wasn’t a beer-drinking day. All I wanted was to protect and shield the most amazing girl from my life. Instead, I had wrecked her.

I heard a knock on the Sand Dollar door. I looked through the window. Rebecca. What in the hell?

I held the towel tightly against my waist and cracked the door. “What are you doing here?”

“Hey to you too.” She smiled.

“Cut it. There aren’t any cameras here unless you invited them.” I closed my eyes. If she had brought the paparazzi onslaught to the campground, I might have to strangle her.

“Oh, Ben, what has you all pissy about everything? Can I come in?” She eyed the hipbone where the towel edges came together.

“No. You can’t.” I sighed. I wasn’t about to let her into the only sanctuary I had left—her perfume filling the place.

“Can’t we at least talk?” She pouted. “I came all this way for you.”

I didn’t buy it, but this was my chance to figure out what her end game was.

“Give me five minutes. I’ll be out. But if I see one damn camera, you are going to regret showing up here.”

“Ok, baby. I’ll just sit right over here.” She pointed at the chairs by the burned-out fire.

I closed the door behind me and rushed to the bedroom. I hated she was here, but if I played my cards right, I might get some answers. I wasn’t the most sought-after actor for nothing. If I turned on the charm and the dazzling smile, I might turn this around.

Three minutes later, I emerged wearing a Davis General Store T-shirt, khaki shorts, and flip-flops. I carried two cups of coffee.

I handed one to Becs. “Here you go. Half a teaspoon of sugar, just how you like it.”

“Aw, you remember that?” She was sitting in the seat that was designated as Chelsea’s. I gritted my teeth and refrained from saying anything.

“Of course. I remember a lot of things.” I settled into the chair next to her. The coffee was piping hot. “Like your love of white roses and puppy memes.”

“That’s sweet. I can say the same thing about you.” She took a sip. “Wow. This view is gorgeous. Have you been here since June?”

“Yep.”

“And what do you do in a place like this? It’s kind of remote. Quaint, but remote.” She eyed Silver Sand Dollar. I knew she wasn’t a camper kind of girl. She was a five-star resort kind of girl.

I tilted my head toward her. “I’ve been keeping busy. There’s more to do here than you think.”

“Oh right, with the girl.” She sighed.

I caught myself before I punched back with something nasty. I couldn’t believe she would mention Chelsea after what had happened yesterday.

“I like the blond. It looks good,” I commented.

“Really?” She twisted a curl through her fingers. “It’s part of my new image. Blondes are apparently more relatable right now. At least, that’s what Lana Pine tells me.” I didn’t agree. There was a girl with gorgeous sun-kissed auburn hair who I couldn’t get enough of.

“Lana knows her stuff. You look good.” I winked, my stomach turning sour. “How is she?”

Rebecca turned to me. “Perfect and brilliant. You know she has so many incredible ideas, Ben. The hair being the first.” She giggled. “The other will be clearing up this whole island girl mess.”

I nodded as if I understood what she was talking about. Somewhere in this conversation were the answers I was looking for. I needed to keep it going until she revealed them.

“About that, Becs, how did anyone find out about Chelsea?” I rested my palm on her knee. I had to do it. Rebecca had to believe I was trying to reconnect in some way.

She grasped the mug with both hands and took a deep sip. “God, Ben, I’m not supposed to tell you this, but I’m starting to feel a little guilty, you know?”

I twirled a circle on her knee with my thumb. “Becs, it’s you and me. You can tell me. You used to tell me everything.”

She leaned over. “I know I can. And you won’t get mad, right? Promise you won’t get all Texas cowboy mad at me.”

“Darlin’, I promise.” I smiled. “No cowboy here, just a beach bum hanging out with you.”

Rebecca and I had never had a smooth relationship. When I first met her on the Wanted set, we had clashed immediately. She needed coaching, and when I tried to guide her, she flew off the handle. But she was beautiful, and when she wanted to be, she was sweet. There was a sort of innocence about her that was hard to resist. I had lost that battle more than once.

“Have you heard about Love & Bondage?” she asked. Her face was excited.

“Maybe. Isn’t that the book that’s been number one all summer?”

“It’s not just number one. It’s the book. It’s the hottest thing that has ever been. Nothing has come close to it.”

I knew she liked to exaggerate. I sat and listened.

“I think it’s sold seventy million copies or something. It’s hot. And the story is unbelievable.” She had that look. I had seen that look.

“Ok, Rebecca, so what does all of this have to do with Love & Bondage?”

“Art Hampton is going to direct it, and they are going to start casting soon. But it has to be the perfect couple. That couple that has fire and passion and will take over the series. This is life changing. It’s the kind of role that will define us.”

I stared at her. “Us? What in the hell are you talking about? There is no us.” I took my hand off her knee.

She looked confused. “I’m talking about you and me being cast in the most epic erotic love story ever written. We can be the stars of Love & Bondage.”

I shook my head. “So, all of this publicity crap is to drum up an endorsement for us to be the stars of some romance movie? You want backing?”

“It’s not just a romance. It is the biggest love story of all time. And we could do it. We could totally do it.” She bit her bottom lip. “We were pretty amazing in bed together. Imagine transcending that on the screen.”

This was fucking unbelievable. I wasn’t campaigning for any roles, and if I were, it wasn’t going to be this one.

“Becs, I don’t think you’ve talked to Rick. I’m out. I’m done with movies. Sorry, sweetheart, but this isn’t going to happen.” I stood to stretch my legs.

“What are you talking about? It was all Rick’s idea.” She stood to match my gaze, barely coming up to my shoulder.

I shook my head. “No. That can’t be. Rick knows how I feel. I’m on an indefinite leave of absence.”

Her eyes flared. “Wake up, Ben. He did all of it. Rick was the one behind this plan. He found you. You think you can just check out of Hollywood? Don’t you know how many people depend on your brand? Your name? Rick saw our makeup as an opportunity of a lifetime for you and me both. If everyone thinks things between us are volatile and passionate in real life, they are going to want to see us act that out in Love & Bondage.”

I heard the words, but I couldn’t believe it. Rick had fucked me over royally. He couldn’t. He wouldn’t’.

“Rick? As in the guy on my payroll Rick? He worked with you to set me up? He sent you here?”

“Babe, don’t be mad. He was trying to protect you, your foundation, and me. Love & Bondage will be worth it. It’s the answer to all these problems.”

“I am not going to be in Love & Bondage.” I seethed. My teeth clenched and I felt my neck tighten.

“You promised we wouldn’t fight.” She stuck her lip out.

“I’m not fighting with you, Rebecca. I can’t believe this shit. He was the one person I trusted. And you. I know we had our problems, but why would you do this to me? If I wanted to be in the damn movie, I’d be in the damn movie.”

She stepped closer and placed her hand on my forearm. “Baby, don’t get mad. Rick was trying to take your career to a new level. He had your best interests at heart. We all do.” She tapped me on the chest, where it was pounding the hardest.

“I can’t fucking believe this.”

“Ben, what I did in Hawaii was the biggest mistake of my life. I swear—”

“It’s time you go.” I stepped back. I didn’t need another apology. I didn’t give a shit how sorry she was. I wasn’t going back to that place. I’d moved on.

“But—we haven’t figured out how to get all the endorsements we need. Don’t you want to take me out on the beach? Maybe go for a swim? Like we did in Acapulco?”

“You heard him. He told you it’s time to leave.” The voice was husky. I turned to see Alice in her favorite leopard bikini.

Rebecca looked at me and then at Alice. “And you are?”

“I’m his friend and his neighbor. We don’t like strangers around here. So I suggest you pack your little designer purse and take your tight little ass out of here.” Alice was now in Sand Dollar’s yard.

Rebecca huffed. “You’re interrupting a private conversation.”

Alice looked at me.

“I think you heard my friend, Becs. It’s time you go.”

“We aren’t done talking, Ben. I’ll call you later.” She reached down and pulled her bag from the chair.

“Oh, we’re done, Rebecca. Very done.” I gritted my teeth.

I watched as she climbed into her car and steered out of the campground.

“Thanks, Alice. Didn’t know I needed rescuing.” I laughed. It felt odd at a time like this.

“Well, I can’t very well have my movie star neighbor upset, can I?” She winked.

“Wait. Did you know?” I looked at her.

“Of course I knew. I’ve seen every one of your movies—some of them three times.”

“But you never said anything.” I was stunned.

“I figured if you wanted us to call you Ben, you wouldn’t have introduced yourself as Jake.” She picked up her beach bucket.

“Alice, I hate to ask, but did you tell anyone?” I winced.

“Honey, your secret has been safe with me since you moved into Silver Sand Dollar on day one. Flora and Carl too.”

“What?” I felt like I was living in the plot twist of a movie.

She laughed at my surprise. “You didn’t think the biggest star in the world could just waltz in here without as much as one person knowing? Flora has one of your calendars. Maybe you could sign it for her.” She waved. “Going for my walk. See you later, baby. If you want to come over for a beer later, I’ve still got your favorite.”

I watched her sashay toward the beach. “Hey, Alice?”

She turned in the sand. “Yeah?”

“How about five o’clock?” Suddenly, I realized what a friend I had in my cougar neighbor.

“See you then.”

I walked into the Sand Dollar. Now I knew Rebecca’s angle, Rick’s level of greed, and that friends were sometimes disguised in leopard print. I ran my fingers through my hair. But how was I going to fix the rest of this mess? Chelsea. I had to get to Chelsea.

CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX

Chelsea

“They’ve been sitting by the mailbox for two days.” My mom looked out the kitchen window toward the cove. “What’s so interesting about my tomatoes?” She laughed and sat next to me.

“I don’t think it has anything to do with your tomatoes, Mom, and everything to do with me.” I sighed as she refilled a tall glass of ice tea. It was too hot for anything else.

“Your father did say that the store is doing really well. All of these reporters have stocked up on souvenirs. It’s like they’ve never been to the beach before.”

We both looked at the three guys sitting across the street from my parents’ driveway. They were equipped with cameras, sandwiches, and bottled water.

My mother continued, “You know, I would have gladly driven over to the McIntire’s to see you. You didn’t need to come over.”

“I couldn’t stay cooped up any longer. Besides, Derek is hovering.”

“But didn’t Ben want you to stay put?” She looked at me.

It was strange how everyone was so comfortable using his new name. It was Jake. His name used to be Jake. “He doesn’t dictate what I do. If I want to see my mother, I’m going to see my mother.” I huffed, realizing I had reverted to my teenage rebellion voice.

“Of course, honey, but he knows this stuff much better than we do. He’s used to all the cameras and the questions. Maybe you should listen to him.”

“I’m not interested in what he has to say.” I also wasn’t interested in listening to anyone defending him. “Do you mind if I check my email?”

“Oh, sure. Use Dad’s computer in the study. I’ll start on some lunch for us.” She cleared the ice tea pitcher and placed it in the refrigerator. “Dad should be here in thirty minutes or so.”

“Thanks.” I watched my mother bustling through the kitchen, setting out the preparations for her homemade chicken salad. She looked content, calm, and most of all happy. She was making lunch for her daughter and hard-working husband, oblivious to the lies their relationship was built upon.

I turned for the study, pushing the parallels my mind was drawing between myself and my mother out of my mind.

When I awakened for the second morning at the beach house, I remembered the email Brandon Edwards was supposed to send. Since the paparazzi invasion, I hadn’t checked my email once If there was a contract, I needed to print it out and read through it. Nothing was certain anymore. I didn’t know if I would sign, if I wanted it, or if any of it was real. I knew that regardless of Ben, I did want to write music again. I couldn’t start that by burning a bridge with Blue Steel Records. Brandon would need an answer.

I hit print on the document and waited for the pages to feed through my father’s printer. They landed lightly in my hands as I watched the twenty-page document materialize.

“Oh, hi, sweetheart. Mom told me you were in here.” My father stood in the doorway of his study. “How are you holding up?”

I sighed. “Ok. I guess.” I shuffled the edge of the contract against the desk, evening up the edges.

“What do you have there?” He pointed at the document.

I knew my father wouldn’t understand much less support an endeavor with the recording company. He always pointed out what a waste of time it was spending days off writing music. Suddenly, I felt reckless. I felt the need to push back.

“It’s a contract with a company in Austin. They want to buy three of my songs and hire me as a full-time writer.” It was the slap I had wanted to deliver to him for months.

Taking his time, he walked to the leather recliner in the corner of his office and lowered into the seat. “Is that right?”

“Yes, and Quinn Jansen wants to record them.” That was the best part, but my father wouldn’t even know who Quinn Jansen was until her songs landed on the adult contemporary station.

He rubbed the armrests of the chair as if that would help him digest the information. “And you’re going to sign the contract and move to Austin?” He didn’t sound angry.

I was confused. Why wasn’t he angry? Why wasn’t he annoyed that I was trying to leave?

“I’m thinking about it. I haven’t even read it yet.” I held up the pages.

“And how much of this has to do with the guy?”

I lowered my eyes. I was slightly relieved he hadn’t given him a name, even though we both knew which guy. The contract had everything and nothing to do with him. I wrote the songs, they were mine, and I knew Quinn Jansen wouldn’t record something if she didn’t love it. However, the demon on my other shoulder told me it was all smoke and mirrors. The only reason that contract was in my hand was because Ben called in a favor with a football buddy. Maybe Quinn was all part of the plot to reel me in farther.

I wiped at my eyes. My father could not see me cry. “I don’t know. I don’t know if any of it is real.” There. I said the words out loud that I had slammed behind a trap door.

“Let me take a look.” He motioned toward my hand. “I’ll look it over.” He reached in his front pocket and slid his reading glasses over his nose.

I handed him the Blue Steel contract and slumped into the seat.

“Hand me my pen. Top drawer.”

I searched the desk for the blue ink pen monogrammed with Hayden Davis and passed it to him.

He circled something on the first page, flipped a few pages, and made an X. I stretched toward him, trying to identify the parts of the verbiage he was marking.

After fifteen minutes, he stacked his glasses on his head. “All right, so it looks like a pretty good deal, but I’ve made some notes for you. The first is that you should have a base salary, and then a stipend for each song you produce instead of paid per song. I don’t want you in Austin without steady income in your pocket. That’s just too damn stressful.”

My eyes widened like saucers. “Wh-what?”

“And then, I marked on here where you need to have full control over the artists who perform your songs. It’s your music. You get to decide. Anything less than that and I don’t think you’d be happy.”

He handed me the contract.

“But—you’re ok with this?” I looked at the pages in my hand with my father’s notes scribbled in the margins. “Where is the lecture?”

“Your mother and I talked.” He sighed. “Ok, your mother talked and I listened. But I heard her point. She’s right. She always is.” He chuckled. “I know you’re not happy at the store. You’ve never been happy at the store. So, maybe you can go do this and work it out so you spend summers at home or travel back and forth. Or maybe in a few years, after you have number one hits out there, you’ll come back to the island and retire so you can be the music teacher at the school.” He smiled at me. “This is the time in your life to figure those things out. Chelsea, I didn’t get that chance. Your grandfather had me training and working in the store. It was a given that it would be mine one day. I don’t know if there is something else I could have done or been good at doing.” He paused, heavy with words. I had never heard my father speak like this before. “This is what your gift is. And we—um—I’m not going to stop you.” I thought his eyes looked misty. “It’s a legitimate contract. I think you should get those changes made and sign it.”

Part of me wanted to sit and hear more of his thoughts. He never opened up about the store or the choices he made at my age. It was hard to think of your parents being twenty-three.

“Really? You’re really ok with this?” I was dumbfounded.

“Yep. We’ll even help you move. Make it a family vacation. I’ve never been to Texas.” He stood from the chair, folding his glasses in half.

I laid the contract on the desk. It hadn’t happened in months, but I threw my arms around my father’s neck and hugged him.

He patted me on the back. “All right, Mom’s got chicken salad for us. Let’s go tell her the news. She hasn’t been on a vacation in years. I can’t wait for you to put that smile on her face.” He walked out of the office.

I had never been more confused in my life. I left the contract and joined my parents for ice tea and chicken salad, like life was normal, serene, and perfect.

CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN

Ben

The passage of time can be a fickle phenomenon. When you’re in love, every divine second feels fleeting as you rush to scramble the sands back into the hourglass. Uselessly trying to pause the moments, the love, the rush that overtakes your body and soul. But when your heart is broken, every second is one that you want to speed past and skip. Time slows to a crawl, dragging your heart through memories and pain that can only be eased by walking through what seems like endless dark days.

A week had gone by since I had seen Chelsea. She wouldn’t answer my calls, and when I stopped by Paul’s house, Derek met me at the door with a don’t-come-back message. Admittedly, I had asked Derek to protect her. I just didn’t think it would work against me.

The collection of reporters Rebecca had assembled for her staged love reunion departed a few days after she did, realizing that Brees Island wasn’t the most exciting place. The locals left me alone, but the tourists knew I was there now and I had seen more cell phones emerge to capture my face than I had seen in months.

Foolishly, I thought once the media storm was over and Rebecca left, Chelsea would realize things could go back to normal. However, maybe once you’ve made national news, things never go back to normal. I didn’t know anymore.

It didn’t feel the same being on Brees Island, knowing that Chelsea wanted me as far away as possible. Silver Sand Dollar was filled with memories of her. Every part of the beach reminded me of walking with her after the hurricane. I couldn’t see a kayak without thinking about going overboard. My sanctuary had turned to loneliness. It was time to leave.

***

“Oh, baby, I’m going to miss you around her. You sure you can’t stay until the end of the month? It’s August and summer is almost over.” Alice pulled on my neck.

I untangled from her arms. “No, I think it’s time to head back to Texas. But that’s between you and me.” I winked. I knew Alice wouldn’t gossip about me. She never had.

“Well, you take care of yourself, and I’ll look for you on the big screen.” She smiled.

I shook my head and tossed my duffle bag into the backseat. “Don’t count on that for a while. I’m taking a break, but you never know.”

After I had fired Rick, I knew I needed to hire a replacement, but that wasn’t going to be easy. How do you hire someone to represent you and handle your media when you don’t want to star in another film? There was still a job to be filled. There was media. There were charity commitments and the foundation to run. Someone had to help navigate the business I had created.

Rebecca might have left the island, but she hadn’t given up on us garnering the Love & Bondage roles. She texted relentlessly, emailed, and left voicemails. It was worse than when I saw her magazine pictures from Hawaii. I wasn’t about to tell her I had ordered a copy of the book. The spine wasn’t broken yet, but if my name was getting tossed around and she was campaigning for it, I at least wanted to understand the fascination and obsession with the story.

I had a meeting set up tomorrow to interview a new agent. He was a fellow Texan, and I hoped Hollywood hadn’t corrupted him yet. It would be a while before I trusted someone like that again, maybe never. Rick had deliberately tracked down Chelsea’s bio under the guise of providing information to Brandon at Blue Steel. That was how we were revealed—how Rebecca found us. I had kicked myself a hundred times for getting involved. If I had left it alone and let her try to break in the music business on her own, we never would have been found.

I looked at the Sand Dollar one last time before snaking down the path to the office.

Mistakes were made way before I asked Rick to get Chelsea in with a label. The first one was lying to her the day I took the job at the store. I didn’t need a job. She would know that now. I had millions in the bank. I could have told her so many times. If I had only seized one of them, maybe I wouldn’t be handing over the Sand Dollar’s keys to Flo.

I closed the screen door behind me. “Hey, Flo.”

“Look who’s here.” She was working on a crossword puzzle.

I held up the key. “I came to drop these off. I’m moving out.”

She stood from behind the desk and walked toward me. I didn’t know what was happening. She reached up with her lips and kissed me on the cheek.

“Flora!” I smiled.

“You know I’m a big fan, and I wasn’t about to let you waltz out of here without at least one smooch.” She giggled like one of my twenty-something fangirls.

“I hear you might have a calendar of mine. Can I sign it before I leave?” I waited while she pulled it from the desk drawer.

“I wasn’t going to ask you to sign it.”

“I know, but I want to.” I reached for her crossword puzzle pen. “To Flora,” I read aloud while I wrote my message. “Thank you for a wonderful summer. I’ll never forget Silver Sand Dollar or you. All my love, Ben.”

I handed it to her. “And thank you for keeping my secret all summer.”

“It’s none of my business.” She swatted at the air. “You going to tell Carl you’re off? He’s fishing.”

“I wouldn’t leave without doing that.” I moved toward the door. “Bye, Flora.” I closed the door behind me and headed to the beach where Carl would be sitting with his pole, waiting for the fish to bite.

***

The ferry crew waved me on the ramp. I had barely made it. When I pulled up and realized I was at the end of the line, a sliver of hope surfaced that maybe I didn’t have to leave Brees Island. Even though I knew there wasn’t any reason to stay. It only brought her more pain if I tried to see her, and I was done causing her pain.

I parked behind a pickup truck and waited for the crew to put the blocks under my tires before stepping out of my Jeep. It might hurt, but I was going to take in every mile of the island while the ferry floated me toward the mainland. I needed to memorize it. I heard the horn blow and I leaned against the railing, letting the wind whip my hair. I pulled my glasses over my eyes and watched Brees Island slip farther away.

CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT

Chelsea

It had been a week, and in those moments when I focused on something else, breathing wasn’t as painful. It should have been an amazing week. I signed the contract with Blue Steel Records, thanks to my father. I still hadn’t come to terms with the steps we had taken in our relationship. It seemed different somehow. Maybe at some point I could talk to him about what he was doing with Eileen, but I was nowhere near ready for that. Right now, we were on speaking terms and he was helping me sort through the business aspect of my first contract. It was something new and delicate.

As phenomenal as the contract was—and the prospect of working with Quinn Jansen—I was experiencing it all blurred and hazy from the numbness that crept in when I wasn’t looking.

His name was Ben Baldwin. Ben Baldwin, I tried saying it so many times, but feeling the betrayal surge through every time it passed over my lips always stopped me cold.

Was any of it real? I had asked myself that question repeatedly. I stared at the ceiling, rocked in my hammock, drank a bottle of wine, and ran on the beach, asking that question. Was it real?

The question had rooted in my heart, and the only way to deal with it was to write about it. The lyrics came out in complete verses, pouring forth with every tear and every sob that shook me.

Every time I heard from him, I shut him out. I didn’t want to hear excuses or justifications for the lies even though I craved them. It felt like weakness invading my body how desperately I wanted to know how sorry he was. If I heard just the right words, maybe the nightmare would go away and I could slide into his arms where the world was safe and calm. But I kept pushing his chance away. It scared me to face him.

I realized I was completely new to the ways of the rich and famous, but when my landlady, Mrs. Gaits, showed up to hand me real estate papers, I almost fainted. Ben had bought my house. Well, he bought it for me. There was a letter enclosed. He wanted me to have a place that was all mine, that I didn’t have to share or worry about nosey neighbors. I thought it was ironic, considering none of my neighbors were the ones who ratted me out to the press. It was all people he knew.

While I was still trying to absorb my new homeowner status, a van pulled up from Banks Security. Ben had called the company to install a security system. He didn’t send a letter with them. Reluctantly, I let the men in. It was highly unlikely my life would be under the media microscope again, but I agreed that if it ever were, I’d rather lockdown in my place instead of Casa del Paul.

The biggest highlight of the week had to be the call with Quinn Jansen. Quinn had called me, and I almost flipped right out of my hammock. She sounded like any other twenty-five-year-old girl—happy, fun, in love with music. I knew we instantly clicked. I trusted her with my music.

Trust. The word had many layers and folds. I had never known it to be such a gray fabric until this week. The one person I had given myself to completely had betrayed me. The one person I considered the island’s biggest liar, I had entrusted with my music career.

I ran my fingers through my hair, closing my eyes. Maybe some time away from Brees Island would take the hurt away, redefine normal, and restore some balance in my life. It was only a four-day trip to Austin to meet with Brandon and Quinn, but it was a welcome distraction.

I stepped from my car. I always liked to watch from the railing when the ferry horn sounded the departure. It was like embarking on a new journey every time.

The salt air filled my lungs, and I leaned against the ship’s wall. The sun felt good on my face. I shifted left, watching the foam bubble up in the wake of the ferry. My eyes trailed along the crowd who had gathered to wave good-bye to the island. I froze. My heart quickened. It was him. Ben Baldwin was standing fifty feet away, leaning against the ferry. Before I could dart back to my car, he saw me. And there was no hiding, no escaping. He was walking, dodging children, bikes, and cars to get to where I was.

CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE

Ben

My heart pounded and my head raced. She was there. Chelsea was on the ferry. If I could get there fast enough, I could touch her. That was fucking stupid. It was the last thing she wanted. Maybe I could talk to her.

I zigzagged between cars, never realizing fifty feet could be so far away.

“Chelsea!” I shouted. She was turning from the railing, and I worried that she might lock herself in her car. I couldn’t blame her. There were a lot of reasons to lock me out.

I jogged to her. She was close to the bow, where there was an open platform too narrow for cars to pull forward.

“What are you doing here?” I asked.

The urge to reach for her and pull her against my chest was unbearable. Why was that the first thing I said, instead of ‘you’re beautiful and I’m an idiot’?

“I’m going to meet with Brandon,” she answered, hiding her blue eyes behind sunglasses.

There wasn’t a right thing to say. I didn’t have words that could undo how badly I had fucked up. But I had to try. “I’m sorry. God, I’m sorry.” Maybe she would listen.

“We can’t talk about this right here. I won’t talk about it.”

“Why not?” I pressed. “You deserve answers. You deserve the truth.”

“The truth?” she scoffed. “Now you’re interested in honesty? I’m finally leaving Brees and you want to talk about taking the blindfold off your lies?” She shook her head. “No. I don’t want to hear any of it. Just let me get back to my car.”

I blocked her path. “No.” My lips pressed together.

“No?”

“You heard me.” It was my last chance. “We have one hour until we get to the other side of the sound. One hour. After I’m done, if you don’t want to, you never have to talk to me again.”

Her hair blew around her bare shoulders.

She pointed at a line of people behind me. “But, see? There’s an audience. I’m not interested in making the news again. I’m not interested in anything that has to do with Ben Baldwin’s life.”

Damn it. Tourists and their smart phones. I searched for somewhere we could hide. If I let her drive off this ferry, it would be final. There would be no second chance.

I grabbed her by the hand, ignoring her attempt to jerk it back.

“Let go.” She wiggled.

“Follow me. You’re going to listen.” I was more stubborn than she was. And stronger.

I climbed a set of stairs to the lounge, tugging Chelsea behind me. There were several couples and a family enjoying the air conditioning inside the cabin.

Chelsea huffed as I reached into my back pocket and pulled out my wallet.

“Listen up.” I cleared my throat, competing with the hum of the ferry engine. “I’ve got a hundred dollars for each of you if you’ll give me the courtesy of having this room for the rest of the ride,” I announced.

Chelsea looked at me as if I had announced I was about to start breaking kneecaps. “You can’t be serious.”

“But, it’s all or nothing, folks. Everyone out or no cash.” I ignored her glare and started counting out the bills. I had enough to pay off these people and the ones downstairs.

“You got it.” The first dad collected his money.

“Yep, we can enjoy the view downstairs.” And older couple smiled.

“Thank you.” The last pair collected their two hundred dollars.

I slid a chair under the door handle to make sure we didn’t have any more interruptions.

“Ok. We’re alone. No cameras, no people. You and me.” I turned toward Chelsea.

She stacked her hands on her hips. “You paid them off!”

I shook my head. “You don’t get it. I want to be alone with you. Yes, I paid them off. I would clear out my bank account to be alone with you.”

“And buy beach houses with it?” she fumed.

“You didn’t like that? I thought you’d want your own place and that way you can keep it secure. You love it there.” I wanted to protect her. It seemed like the best way.

She spun on her heels and looked out the window. “I do love it, but I don’t love being bought. Is that what being a movie star is all about?” Her eyes narrowed. “You buy people’s silence? Their loyalty? Their love? Is that how it works for you?”

That hurt, but I deserved it. I had given her every reason to believe I was a dick instead of just being myself from the beginning.

I inhaled all the air my lungs would take in. I needed strength. I needed the speech of my life to get her back. I needed a damn Oscar-worthy script.

“Chels.” I sighed. “I lied to you about who I was. I lied. I am a liar. But—”

“No. There are no buts for lying. Everything was dishonest and concocted.” She ran her hands through her hair. Her voice was quiet. “Why couldn’t you just tell me your name? Two words—it was only two words,” she pleaded as she lowered into the chair.

I looked out the window. There were people gathered below with cameras. By now, they knew I had handed out cash to reserve the lounge. I reached above each window and tugged on the pulleys until all the blinds were closed.

It was as if she was in a trance. She kept talking, so I kept listening. “Did you think I cared about your money or about your fame? Did you really think it mattered to me that you’re a movie star? I haven’t even seen any of your damn movies!”

“Ok, I get what I did was wrong. And no, I never thought that stuff mattered to you. I know you don’t care if I have fifty million dollars or enough to buy us dinner.”

Her eyes flared. “No, I didn’t want any of that from you. That’s not what we were about.”

Here she was telling me the things I had known and felt since the first day on the docks. There were more important things in life, and I would give every cent I had if I could trade my life in and stay on Brees Island with her.

“I was stupid and made the biggest mistake of my entire life. Believe that.”

A tear rain down her cheek. “How can I believe anything you say? You have lost all credibility.”

I kneeled in front of her, wanting to wipe the tear from her face, but knowing she would probably slap me if he tried to touch her.

“Can I tell you why I came to Brees Island?” It was a story she needed to know. I waited for her to answer.

She nodded. “Why not? I’m locked here.”

“Because I wanted normal. I wanted my life back. Becs and I were dating.” I noticed her eyes flared at the mention of Rebecca. “And she went to Hawaii to shoot another film. Anyway, she hooked up with some guy and it made headlines.”

“I remember that story,” Chelsea whispered.

“The headlines got it wrong. I wasn’t heartbroken. She and I were done before she ever cheated. But I was tired of my personal live being splashed across every magazine and making the entertainment channels. It was humiliating to see another one of my failures on display for everyone to see. I was fucking embarrassed. And done. I was done with being a headline. Done with Becs. With relationships. All of it.

“So, I got drunk. Woke up to what was my life and decided something had to change. That was only going to happen if I did something different. I bought a Jeep, and started driving. I drove as far as I could, and when the road ran out, I hopped this ferry and rode it until I ended up on Brees.”

Her eyes glistened. “You just ditched your Hollywood life to live in a camper all summer?” she questioned.

“I didn’t have a plan or even a reservation. I slept in the campground because the hotels were closed when I drove in. Carl suggested Silver Sand Dollar, and she was perfect. Something I didn’t even know I needed. No one knew where to find me.”

“But you told everyone you were here as a writer, or was start that lie just for me?”

I knew the writer cover hit her hard. It was a connection she thought we shared.

“I made it up as I went along. I didn’t know who I could trust. Who would sell me out. Who would take pictures of me on the beach or drinking a beer. As far as I knew, everyone was a photographer in tourist’s clothing,” I admitted.

I tried to smile. I wanted her to understand. But from the outside I knew it sounded ungrateful and selfish to slap the hand that helped build my fame and fortune. At one time, pictures of me were the thing that made me popular. The paparazzi pushed me to the pinnacle of fame.

“I don’t get it, though. Why did you take the job at the store? You didn’t need to do that. You didn’t have to take it that far,” she attacked.

“Because of you.” I kept my voice low. If she would just let me hold her, I could fix it. “You looked so miserable and I couldn’t stand to see a pretty girl like you with that look on your face. God, Chelsea, you are the most beautiful and amazing woman I have ever known.”

“But you didn’t even know me.” She sniffed. “Why would you stock boxes and waste your time in a stupid kayak stand?”

I had done a lot of things to impress girls before, but truly, a summer as a clerk had to be at the top of the list. I wished she could grasp the significance.

I grinned at her. “Come on. You know me. I like to make you smile.”

“I don’t know if I do know you.” Her voice was bitter.

“But you do. I swear, you know the real me that none of those people out there do.” I pointed to the door. “I was me when I was with you. I know you don’t believe it. I don’t deserve for you to believe it, but I was me with you. For the first time in a long time, I got to be the man I should be.”

Other than the hum from the ferry, the room was quiet. She was too quiet. I hoped it meant she was thinking through my words.

“Ben.” She said it calmly.

“Yes, it’s Ben.” I searched her eyes for any clue as to what she was feeling. I felt lost and desperate, knowing the time was ticking on the ride.

“Ben Baldwin.” The name whispered over her lips.

Patience wasn’t my strong suit. If she made me sit here one more second without telling me how she felt, I was afraid my fist would end up inside the wall of the ferry.

“Chelsea, please look at me.” Her eyes drifted to mine. “I will do anything and everything for another chance with you. I am so sorry.”

She stared, her eyes tearing at my soul. “Did you make me fall in love with you as part of the charade?”

It was as if she had pushed all the air from my body. “God, no. No.”

How could she think that? I couldn’t take it anymore. I reached for her neck, my hands tangling in her hair, and crushed my mouth against hers.

She pushed against my chest and her warm lips fought the kiss, but I wrapped my arm around her tighter. The pain in my chest eased as I inhaled her scent and took her mouth with deeper kisses.

She climbed into my lap, her hands tugging on me in all directions. Nothing had ever felt like this. My hand slid along her back. Our arms twisted and franticly grasped at any part of each other we could touch. I never wanted her this badly.

Chelsea sat forward, breaking the kiss and pushing against my chest.

“I-I— We can’t. We do this too quickly. It’s too easy to touch each other like everything’s normal. When I know it’s not normal. You are a movie star. This is not normal.” She pulled her leg from my waist, and braced herself to stand. “You can’t seduce me back to you.”

My chest heaved and my stomach tightened. I stood to catch her before she made it to the door. This wasn’t over.

“You don’t think that’s what this is, do you? We have something that goes way beyond sex.” The sex was fucking incredible, but I needed her.

She leaned against the door. “I thought we did. At least I did before Rebecca showed up.”

Damn it, Becs.

“How about the poem I wrote for you? Or the beach glass I saved from the hurricane? And seriously, I wore the ugliest apron on the planet for you. I wouldn’t have done any of those things for a summer hook up. You mean more than that. I didn’t have to do a damn thing, but I did. I choose you. I wanted you.”

I watched her biting her bottom lip, her resolve slipping. But she turned for the door, trying to wrestle the chair braced under the handle.

“Chelsea, stop.”

She twirled. “That power you had over me is gone. You don’t have that control now.” Her eyes burned into mine.

“But you do.” I reached for her wrist.

“What?” Her eyes darted back and forth.

“I am only on this damn ferry because I thought it was what you wanted. I don’t want to leave, but I will do anything to make you happy again. If that means leaving or if that means staying.” I tucked her hair behind her ear. “You, are the one in control.” I caressed the side of her throat.

Her eyes closed, and I didn’t know if she was fighting off the feeling or taking it all in. What else could I say? What else could I do to prove that I had fucked up, and if she would let me, I would make it up in every way possible.

“Say something.”

I was about to try to kiss her again, when her long lashes opened. I saw the fire in her blue eyes. The fire that kept me up at night. The one that distracted me when I least expected it.

Her hands reached behind my neck, and she drew me toward her, bringing my mouth on hers. I groaned as her tongue played with mine.

“I missed you.” I held her face between my hands.

“I know.” She fisted her hands in my hair, sighing against my cheek. “Me too.”

I growled, burying my head in her shoulder. I had missed everything about this part of her body—the way it felt on my lips and how her shampoo smelled as I nuzzled into the warmth of her neck. She was like the sun. My own summer surrender.

“Tell me,” she moaned.

“What?” I kissed her ear. I thought I had said everything. The truth was out.

She pressed her palms against my chest and rubbed the rigid muscles.

“You have to tell me.” She grinned wickedly.

I looked at the clock over the door, the closed blinds, and the chair under the door.

I pulled her against me and leaned down to whisper in her ear. “Fuck me.”

She ran her fingertips along my stomach. “Right here? Right now?” she teased.

I nodded. My eyes urged her to do what she wanted. I was hers.

She shook her head. “Uh-uh. You have to tell me,” she purred as she dipped her hand below my waistband.

I sucked in sharply. She always had this effect on me—taking me to the edge with the things she could do.

“Chelsea, you can fuck me now. Here. Wherever you want.” I leaned back. “Just take me.” I had never given control up like that. Power and anxiousness coiled together as I realized how freeing it was to ask her for what I wanted.

My body come alive under her command. But I knew there was something else I had to tell her. I had waited until it was too late before, and I wasn’t going to make that mistake a second time. I would never risk losing her again. Maybe she hadn’t completely forgiven me, but this was her way of saying there was still something there—it wasn’t over. I needed to take the next leap. I had to tell her.

“Chelsea?” I tried to focus. The burning in my belly was intense and her hands were all over my cock.

“Mmm-hmm?” She gripped my hands against her hips, shimming her skirt up around her waist. Her shoulders flattened against the wall, and I watched her breasts rise as her breath quickened.

My eyes met hers. I didn’t whisper. I didn’t want to make her guess. This was the fucking moment of truth.

“I am in love with you.”

The light I loved so much, the one I was afraid I had dimmed with my lies, glowed when she smiled.

“Ben,” she whispered.

My mouth descended on hers and everything else faded away.

CHAPTER FOURTY

Chelsea

“And why are we taking a private plane again? I had an airline ticket.” I tried to relax into the leather seat as a flight attendant handed me a glass of champagne. I had missed my scheduled flight.

“Because, I don’t want to put you on a plane alone, and I think you’ll like this much better.” Ben winked as he buckled in across from me.

One thing on a private jet is that there aren’t rows of seats. This one was set up like a living room. He was directly in front of me, where I could keep my eye on his perfect face. I couldn’t argue with him that the plane was beautiful. I’m sure it was a struggle for him to squeeze into regular airline seats. He looked comfortable on his mini-couch.

He raised his glass. “To first trips.”

“To first trips.” I tasted the bubbly. It was cold and smooth. “So, when we land in Austin, what are we going to do?” My meeting with Blue Steel Records was tomorrow afternoon, and except for that one, all of my other plans had gone right out the window the minute I let Ben kiss me again.

“We are driving to the ranch. I want you to see where I live. It’s no island, but I think you’ll like it.” He looked excited.

“Do they serve cowboy steak there?” I teased. I wouldn’t be surprised if he had a fire pit. He loved building a fire with the driftwood he collected. I wondered what kind of wood they used on the ranch.

“Lenny will make anything you want.”

“Lenny?”

“Yeah, ranch chef.” He said it like it was well-known fact.

Of course he would have a ranch chef. That’s what famous rich people had, right? I didn’t have any idea how many people worked for Ben or how big his network was. What I had learned about his famous life took place over the week we spent apart. It was my crash course into Hollywood gossip. I searched for articles, pictures, and anything with his name on it. It wasn’t my best decision. I learned more than I wanted to about his bachelor status, and about the girls before me.

Today was a whirlwind. Ben had left his Jeep with one of the ferry attendants, paying him to drive it back to my house. Then he hopped behind the wheel of my car and drove us all the way north on Highway 12. True, there was a bit of a commotion when we emerged from the lounge, but we had to hope it wasn’t enough to make a blip on the social media radar.

None of it made sense, but what makes sense when you realize you’re in love with the one person who keeps you breathing, who simultaneously spins and stops your world. You don’t close the door on that person—not a second time.

“What are you thinking about over there, pretty girl?” He flashed his killer smile. I didn’t want to fall for it the first day I saw it on the docks, but I did—right into the creek.

“I’m thinking about my meeting with Brandon and Quinn tomorrow, and how I’m going to tell my parents I’m on a plane with you right now, and I’m wondering—”

He was out of his seat and his hands planted on either side of my head. “Am I going to have to kiss you all the way to Texas to keep you from worrying?” He brushed his lips against mine.

I couldn’t help but sigh and drink in the kiss that tasted like champagne. Private planes were even better than I thought. “No, but it’s a lot to sort through.” I raised my eyebrow.

He slid back into his seat. “Yes, it is.”

After he had started driving, we started talking. It was as if we were never apart. We fell back into our same dance moves, only this time it felt like they were stronger and sharper. We were going to Austin together. We were going to be together. There wasn’t a label or a promise tagged to the conversation, but our hearts understood.

The captain announced that we were about to take off. I watched as the runway peeled past us and we shot into the air, headed for the Lonestar State. The state responsible for creating Ben Baldwin.

Ben was reading something he had pulled from his bag. I bit on my lower lip. Just watching him made me happy. When he was gone, everything hurt. In only eight hours, all of the ache that had circled and clamped on my heart had removed its talons. It was beating again, wildly and hurriedly for him.

“What are you reading?” I asked, noticing his hands were stretched over the title.

He blushed and his fingers moved to the side.

“You’re reading Love & Bondage?” I giggled. It was a chick book. The kind that girls at school couldn’t stop talking about. It was popular, erotic, and hot. I had read it before graduation.

“Should I not read it?” He folded it in his lap.

“Oh no, read it. Definitely read it.” Ben didn’t need pointers, and he certainly didn’t need any creative suggestions in bed, but there was always the chance it might inspire him. My chest tingled with the idea.

The captain announced we were at a safe altitude to move about the cabin. I smiled as the flight attendant appeared to refill my champagne.

I wondered what Ben would be like in Texas. Could he be more cowboy than he already was? He had told me he didn’t want to make any more movies for a while, but he still had responsibilities with a staff, and he had loose ends to tie up with the latest press fiasco.

He had made it abundantly clear that he would do anything and everything I needed for my music. I loved that about him; he was filled with more good than I had ever seen. He helped everyone, and put him or her first—always.

I felt my shoulders relax. That protective nature kept him from telling me the truth. Honestly, I don’t know what I would have done if I had known who he was from the beginning. I didn’t care that he was a celebrity, but it might have kept me from giving him a chance. It would have been too intimidating to know I was dating the World’s Sexiest Bachelor. I giggled, realizing I had caught the biggest fish of the summer.

I unbuckled the belt around my waist and moved next to Ben. He reached for a pillow, shoved it at the end of the loveseat, and laid down, giving me the perfect nook to cuddle into.

I nestled on his chest, settling into the rhythm of his breath. He held the book up with one hand. I loved the way he felt under my palms. I loved his cologne. I loved his hand resting on my hip. I loved everything about him.

He might have been cussing about something he read, I wasn’t sure. I closed my eyes and let my body melt into his. Nothing felt better in the world than sleeping next to my very own movie star. And he was mine.

###

Keep Reading to find out what happens next for Ben and Chelsea in a preview of

Bucking Bareback.

Can’t get enough of cowboy billionaire bad boys? Follow Maggie on her website!

BUCKING BAREBACK

CHAPTER ONE

Ben

The pilot called over the speaker to announce the plane was making its final approach into Austin. I folded my book and tossed it on the floor. Home. It had been four long months since I had been home. I had tried to outrun my life, but failed. I fought. I hid. I resisted. I lied. But now I was back, only this time I wasn’t alone.

Chelsea was tucked and curled against my side—where she fit perfectly. She had fallen asleep soon after takeoff. I studied her face, half-covered with her auburn locks. I envied the sleep she found. There was no way my mind would have done anything but cycle through everything that could go wrong. If I held on a little tighter, pulled her a little closer, maybe there was a way to protect her. I didn’t want to move my hand from her hip or shift to wake her.

There were certain moments that I knew I couldn’t get back. This was one of them. We were still us. Just Ben and Chelsea. The minute the plane landed, it would all change.

They would be waiting. They were always waiting.

The flight attendant hovered nearby and I waved her off. Her name tag said Ally. She was only trying to follow safety procedures for the landing, but we needed more than seat belts for what was ahead of us.

I wrapped my free arm across Chelsea and drew her against my chest as the wheels hit the pavement. If only keeping her safe was always this easy. The impact jostled us both and her eyes fluttered open.

“Hey.” She smiled.

“Hey.” I planted a kiss on her forehead before she stretched into an upright position.

“I slept the entire way?” She looked toward the window. Her nose wrinkled in disappointment.

I straightened my legs. They were cramping up, but it was worth it to let her sleep like that. “Yep. You seemed tired, so I let you nap.” I didn’t want to tell her all the selfish reasons I wanted her pressed against me.

“We’re in Texas?” She leaned closer to me, her eyes darting back and forth like she was trying to read my mood.

“Darlin’, we’re in Texas.” I couldn’t believe we were in my home state together.

Was it really this morning that I said goodbye to everyone at the campground and left Brees Island with a hole in my heart?

I was prepared to live with that heartache. After all, I was responsible for everything that had happened.

The lies.

The deceit.

The paparazzi swarm. It was all my doing. When I thought I had left Chelsea behind, I thought a part of me had stayed behind too. The pain had wrapped my bones and suffocated me. The only thing I knew to do was leave. Give her what she wanted—as much distance and space from me as possible.

It was hard to believe that was over. The hurt and the pain from losing her had evaporated. She was here with me. We were together.

Leaning across the love seat, she brushed her lips against mine, and I instinctively pulled her into my lap. It didn’t take much for her to distract me. I blamed the pretty blue eyes she batted in my direction. It didn’t matter—I would kiss her anytime and anyplace she’d let me.

Everything about her lit me on fire. I growled in her ear, wishing there weren’t a flight attendant and two pilots on board with us.

“I can’t wait to take you home.”

Chelsea pulled back and grinned. Her eyes shot across my shoulder to the window behind me. “Me either, but it looks like we have a welcome wagon.” She pointed.

I knew, flying into Texas, there would be a press group, but I was hoping, for Chelsea’s sake, it would be minimal. I had only gotten her back a few hours ago, and this firestorm could shake the newly formed foundation we had built.

I took her hand in mine and squeezed it a few times as we looked through the windows of the jet. It might be dark, but there was no mistaking the mass of people gathered with cameras.

“You ok with all of this?” I surveyed her face before tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

Her eyes widened as the jet came to a standstill on the tarmac. The flashes shot through the air like lightning strikes, and the door hadn’t even opened yet.

“I think so.” She whispered the words toward the window, and I worried it was already too much.

“We can wait it out.” I thought about the best exit strategy. “Or, why don’t I go out and talk to them, and then I can have someone from the airport sneak you to the car? That could work.” I was trying to formulate a plan B and C, but she stopped me.

“No.” She turned to face me. “We’re doing this together. This is a part of you, and I need to get used to it. You are Ben Baldwin, right? The World’s Most Sought-After Bachelor,” she teased.

I loved that she was determined to face the reporters, and loved it even more that she was ready to embrace this part of my life, but I felt the familiar pain under my ribs as I inhaled. It was sharper with each breath. This was the last welcome I would have planned for her. There had to be a way to shield her from it.

I wanted to run to the cockpit and tell the pilots to fly straight back to North Carolina, back to where we could disappear on a nameless beach and blend in with the locals. Texas was home, but I felt homesick for the Sand Dollar and everything we had on Brees Island. Life was simple and easy there.

What if she felt the same way? What if she regretted the decision to fly to Austin? She was only supposed to be in town for a few days to meet with Brandon at Blue Steel Records. This could be over before I even got to show her the ranch.

My real life was outside the walls of this plane, and it might be more than either of us could handle. When I had the chance to get her back, all I could think about was kissing and holding her, laughing and talking with her. Loving her. Now protecting her was part of it too.

Watching the flashes ricochet off the jet, I worried my selfishness to have her back had outweighed my judgment. No one would voluntarily sign up for this.

“You sure? They can be kind of brutal. You don’t have to get used to it tonight. We can ease into it.”

I thought back to how she had been ambushed in the parking lot at her father’s store and followed by a pack of paparazzi. Even her parents wound up as targets.

Chelsea wrapped her hands around my neck and smiled. “Yes, I’m absolutely sure. Besides, I have a feeling there is no easing into life with Ben Baldwin.” She winked and I had to chuckle. That was usually my move.

There was no denying those blue eyes. If she was ready to do this, I was going to make damn sure I controlled as much of the press onslaught as I could.

“Ok, well just stay next to me. I’ll make a statement and then we’re off to the ranch. It will be quick and painless.” I forced a smile, knowing there was nothing painless about facing the assembly on the tarmac. There would be questions, and there would be false accusations. Rebecca would inevitably come up.

“I’ll be fine. Stop worrying.” She reached for her backpack and slipped it over her shoulder. “I’ll let you do all the sweet talking and I'll just watch you in action.” She poked me in the side.

“I’m glad you find the humor in all of this.” I shoved the book into the side pocket, pulled the zipper on my bag, and stood. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. You never do.”

She clutched my hand as we waited for the flight attendant to open the door. “I know that. Stop worrying.”

Despite the private jet and the private terminal, the press was still allowed to congregate. I usually flew out at abnormal times, missing the frenzy, but ever since the breakup-reunion story of Rebecca Campbell and Ben Baldwin made headlines last week, the reporters were anxious to catch a glimpse of me, maybe even snag a quote.

We would have to walk down the plane’s stairs, through the private terminal, and reemerge through another set of doors before we could duck into the car. I could manage the system effortlessly. With Chelsea, it was going to be a completely different experience.

Unlike Becs, who sought the cameras, spoon-fed reporters quotes, and worked her audience, Chelsea was new to this twisted game.

“Mr. Baldwin, you may exit the plane now.” Ally, the flight attendant, smiled brightly as she swung the door to an open position. “It was a pleasure flying with you, sir.”

I nodded at her and thanked both pilots. I looked past the door. The ground crew had already attached the stairs. There wasn’t anything keeping us on the jet. Still, I felt as if my boots had lead soles weighing me to the threshold.

It had already been said, but I felt like I was pushing her into the very thing that ruined every relationship before this one. I had to ask again.

“You’re ready for this?”

“If you don’t get off this plane, I’m going to start thinking you don’t want to take me home.” Her eyes flared.

“All right, all right, pretty girl. Let’s do this.”

I clasped her hand in mine and pulled Chelsea behind me as we descended the steps, leaving the safety of the jet and diving headfirst into tomorrow’s headline.

CHAPTER TWO

Chelsea

No handbook can prepare a girl for her debut into the public spotlight. It’s a sink or swim situation. I knew as long as Ben kept his hand wound around mine I’d be on the swimming end. If he let go, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to come up for air on my own.

I clasped a little tighter around his palm. I felt steadier this way. Ben wouldn’t let them drown me like they did in the store parking lot. He was here this time. Together. We were together.

I hoped I had convinced him with enough smiles and laughter that I could take on the press. With the crowd gathered below, nothing could be farther from the truth.

The flashes came in rapid succession until I felt my feet hit the runway pavement.

“Ben, where’s Rebecca?”

“Is this the new girl?”

“Welcome back to Texas.”

“Is Rebecca still heartbroken?”

“Have you spoken to her?”

“Do you feel responsible for ending the relationship, Chelsea?”

My head whipped in the direction of the last question. The questions and comments flew from all angles. The tenseness started in my shoulders, rounded my elbow, and locked in my fingers. Ben knuckles were probably white from how hard I held on.

I studied him amid the flashes, looking for the same panicked look that had crept across my face, but he was smiling.

“Hey, y’all. Just happy to be back home.” He grinned, his white teeth in perfect rows forming a killer smile. He slapped one of the reporters on the back as if they were buddies. “There’s no place like Texas.”

The comment stung a bit, but I reminded myself he had to play the part for the reporters. He was a professional. There was a reason the press liked him so much.

“What about Love & Bondage, Ben? Have you signed yet?”

“The author tweeted today she wants you for the movie.”

“Did you hear Chip Heart is up for the role too?”

I followed Ben as he weaved through the crowd, navigating a path like an expert. He didn’t acknowledge the Love & Bondage questions.

He threw his free hand in the air to wave to the group. “We’ll see y’all later. Have a good night.”

He held the glass door open and shuttled me inside the private airport.

“You did great.” He smiled. “One more door and we’ll be on our way to the ranch.” He started down the tiled corridor, his boots echoing off the walls. “Chelsea?”

Maybe this is what stage fright felt like. Maybe it was what rookie singers dealt with before a performance. It was one of the reasons I stuck to songwriting. I couldn’t form a word. My throat was dry, and if I was supposed to take another step forward, I wasn’t sure how to make my legs execute the movements. The resolve I had felt when we were on the plane melted as soon as the reporters started pelting us with questions. All I could think about was the day they assaulted me in the General Store parking lot. It was sickeningly familiar.

“Darlin’, what’s wrong?” Ben’s hands were on either shoulder, his grip firm. “Hold on, let’s sit down for a second.”

He led me toward an open door, maneuvered me into the room, and placed me in a recliner. It didn’t look like a regular lounge room. I noticed the navigation charts on the walls, the warming coffee pot, and the low hum of the news channel running in the background. This must be where the pilots congregated before flights.

Ben shoved a cup of cold water in my hand. “Take a sip,” he ordered.

I did as he commanded, as if under some kind of hypnosis. The water felt cool on the back of my throat, soothing the dryness.

“Ok, I know that was a lot to handle out there, but if we can make it through one more door, it will be over.” He knelt in front of me, brushing the hair away from my face. “The ranch is gated, and there are twenty acres between the road and the front door. No press there, I promise. But you take your time. We’ll stay here as long as you need.”

For a few moments, I felt my lungs fill then relax as they were depleted of air. Was it only this morning I had packed her bags for Austin, prepared to make this journey alone? There was no Ben. There was no us. No we. I was tackling this trip on my own. Diving headfirst into my songwriting career. All that changed the second he spotted me on the ferry.

“Chelsea?”

His voice urged me to answer.

“Yeah?”

“Do you want to try it? The car is right outside the door. We’ll be out of here in a second, baby.” His hands rested on my knees as I sipped the last drops of water.

He had warned me about the Rebecca questions, but hearing them still startled me. When I was with Ben, I didn’t think about anyone else, especially not his ex. But Rebecca was clearly on everyone else’s mind. The cocoon we had lived in on the island all summer was over. From now on, I would be sharing Ben with the prying eyes of the world. The problem was, I wasn’t sure I was ready for it.

He ran a hand through his sandy brown hair, keeping his gaze on me.

“Ok,” I whispered.

“Ok?”

I nodded. “I’m ready. One more door, right?”

Ben stood tall in front of me, and then pulled me against him. “One more door. That’s it. You’ve got this.” He led me to the corridor.

It was a simple glass door. The kind that allowed people to enter or exit the private terminal. There was a single doorknob on it, with a chime that rang every time someone opened it. I stared through it as we walked closer, knowing there was more to this door than any other I had faced.

The camera lights bounced around us. Ben ushered me into the passenger side before jogging to the driver’s seat. An airport worker handed him a set of keys, gushed a few fan words, and then closed the door behind the star.

Ben’s hand slid to my knee. The paralysis that had gripped me was finally subsiding. It wasn’t normal, but breathing felt easier.

“Ready to see the ranch?” He winked then shifted the car into drive. “You just made it through the hardest part.”

***

The only ranches I was familiar with were in movies. There was nothing even close to resembling a ranch on Brees Island unless you could call Paul McIntire’s place a beach ranch.

Wagon wheels, rustic fences, and open fields with running horses were the first images I associated with Ben’s home, even though I had never seen a single picture of it. It was a clichéd stereotype, but it wasn’t as if he had given me anything to go on.

I should know these things about where he was from. We had spent an entire summer together. When you spend that much time with someone, shouldn’t you know what his house looks like? What color his bedroom is? If he even has a single houseplant? I wondered if there were more things I didn’t know than I did.

So much had happened since this morning.

We had put ourselves back together. It felt real and secure, but at the same time, I knew it was delicate. I only had four days in Austin to work out my contract with Blue Steel before I was scheduled to return home. What if we couldn’t make all the broken pieces fit together the way they did before?

“Hey, what’s going on over there?” Ben turned down the radio.

“What do you mean?” My gaze had been set out of the window ever since we pulled away from the terminal curb, but I couldn’t recall anything I had seen on the drive.

“You look like you’re thinking about something, and I have a feeling it’s not lyrics.” He slowed the car to a crawl and turned onto a dirt road. “But if there’s a song in there, I want to hear it.”

I shrugged, not wanting to sour his happy mood. This was part of the delicate stage we were in. I was still trying to find my footing. “No song. Just taking in the scenery. Are we at the ranch?” I looked at the big B displayed over the gate’s archway.

“Yep. This is it.” He rolled down the window and entered an access code into the keypad.

I watched as the iron fence separated just enough for the car to pass through. He waved at a man stationed in a small hut by the gate. The gates closed behind us as Ben drove over the threshold of the Baldwin estate.

I tried to quell the excitement that had started to bubble. I prided myself on not getting wrapped up in celebrity, or in this case, all the perks of being with a movie star. But it was becoming more evident that Ben lived a completely different life than I did.

“Tomorrow, when we have some daylight, I’ll show you the whole place. I know it’s kind of hard to see right now.” Ben pointed out a few of the fields and ponds along the way, explaining what kind of fish he had stocked or where the particular cattle came from.

I listened and watched as the acres rolled under the tires and the car drove deeper into the ranch, turning around sharp corners and following the fence line.

“All of this is yours?” I asked.

“Sure is, darlin’. And see? Those reporters can’t get in here. The perimeter fence is wired, there’s a gate, and I have a security system on the house. You’ll be as far away from that mess as I can get you.”

His eyes focused on the driveway that had sprung up out of the gravel. I stared at the house in front of me. If you could call it that. It wasn’t a house. It was a resort.

“This? This is your ranch?” I pointed to the sprawling set of buildings. It was bigger than South Fork. It was bigger than the White House. It was a monster ranch.

“What do you think?” He waited while one of the ten garage doors opened and he could steer the car inside.

“When you said ranch, I thought you meant a little house out in the open. This-this is…” I didn’t know how to finish the statement without hurting his feelings.

Now that I was here, I could see what a contrast it was for him to spend an entire summer in a camper. Silver Sand Dollar was probably the size of his pantry. How could the same person live in this mansion?

I stepped from the car and waited for Ben to direct me. There were multiple doors surrounding us, and I didn’t know which one would take me inside. Suddenly, I felt off balance again.

“Right this way.” He ushered me in the closest door, and we walked through a short hallway before emerging in the kitchen.

“Wow.” I had never seen anything like it. It was as if I was standing in the center of an Architectural Digest spread.

“Lenny’s probably still awake if you want something.” Ben tossed our bags on the floor.

“Oh no. I’m good.” My hand slid along the smooth granite, feeling it’s coolness against my palm.

“How about a drink?” He opened a closet door. No, it wasn’t a closet—it was a beer fridge. Ben had an entire walk-in closet stocked with beer. Cold beer.

I nodded. Over the summer, I had gotten used to drinking it with him. It might help make things feel grounded again. Because standing here in his opulent kitchen, I felt like the girl from a small island was more like a fish out of water.

He twisted off the tops and handed me an icy bottle. “Welcome to the ranch.” His bottle tapped against mine.

I smiled before taking a sip.

“Mr. Baldwin, you’re home.” A man in his mid-thirties appeared in the doorway.

“Hey, Lenny. Yep, just got in.” Ben crossed the kitchen to shake his hand. “This is Chelsea. She’s going to be staying at the ranch.”

“Nice to meet you, Miss Chelsea.” Lenny grinned.

“Oh, you can call me Chelsea. No need for the ‘miss’ part.” I grew up calling people “miss,” but I didn’t feel old enough for someone to use it on me, and especially not someone who was older than me.

“Certainly, Miss—er, Chelsea.” Lenny blushed then took a step toward the refrigerator. “Can I fix a late dinner for you two? I’m sure you’re hungry from the trip.” He started rummaging through a crisper drawer.

Ben tipped his eyebrows in my direction. “Lenny’s the best. You sure you don’t want something? An omelet? Grilled cheese? A steak?”

I shook my head and clasped the cold bottle in hand. “Still not hungry.”

“All right, Lenny, I think we’re good. See you in the morning.”

“Good night, Mr. Baldwin. Good to have you home. We missed you around here. Call if you need anything.” Lenny disappeared through the side door.

“Does he live here?” I asked. I hadn’t checked the time, but it had to be close to ten o’clock.

“Sure does. He has an apartment off the kitchen and has a garden courtyard. He grows fresh herbs. Pretty amazing guy.”

“Wow, that sounds incredible. He grows all the herbs?”

Ben stepped closer, placing his bottle on the counter. His arm circled my waist. “What do you say I show you the main suite? Particularly the shower?” He winked.

I giggled. Our last shower had been in a two by two, cramped camper. I could only imagine what this one would be like.

“Yes, I like the sound of that.” I bit lightly on my lower lip as Ben’s hand slid along the back of my shirt, inching above my waist.

His lips pressed into mine, and I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him deeper into me. His tongue swirled, and the little moans that escaped my throat surprised me. Somehow, after a week apart, this still felt new. I felt my hips settle on the counter as Ben lifted me on the smooth surface.

All the burning I felt for him surfaced in rapid succession as his kisses trailed from my lips down my throat. His mouth toyed at the base of my neck as his fingers began unfastening the buttons holding my shirt together.

“Ah-hem.”

I jumped as I heard a woman’s voice at the other end of the kitchen.

I grasped at the corners of my shirt to button them back together.

“Excuse me, sir.” The woman’s eyes focused on the floor.

“Hi, Nan.” Ben took a step away and straightened his jeans. I had to fight off a giggle. He was clearly struggling with the stretched and hardened bulge in his jeans.

“I heard you were back and wanted to welcome you home and see if there was anything you needed.” Nan still hadn’t brought her eyes any higher.

“We were just headed up.” Ben grabbed my hand and helped me down from the counter. “This is Chelsea. She’s going to be staying at the ranch.”

“Nice to meet you, ma’am.” Nan nodded and smiled.

I couldn’t fathom a more awkward introduction. I was practically half-undressed from the waist up, and Ben’s mouth had been torching my skin when the woman walked in. I could still feel heat radiating from my neck.

“Nice to meet you too.” I smiled weakly, still clasping my shirt.

“Should I prepare one of the guest suites?” Nan asked.

Ben chuckled. “No, no, I think I can take care of her accommodations.”

If the woman was fazed by his directness, she didn’t show it. I hoped that wasn’t a sign that Ben regularly hosted women in his room. I had to stop thinking like that.

“Certainly. Let me know if you need anything this evening.” Nan walked out of the kitchen.

Ben turned toward me. “Sorry about that. I guess I should have thought about the employees. It's just hard to keep my hands off you.” He squeezed my inner thigh, pressing with his thumb.

“How many more are there?” I asked.

“In the house? Just two more, but they don’t live here. Out on the land, I have twenty,” he replied.

“Twenty?” I gulped.

“Yep. Security, maintenance, landscapers, ranch hands for the cattle and horses. It’s kind of a long list. Then there are the others who work for me directly or for the foundation that I meet with regularly. None of them live here.”

I tried to process the information. There was basically a Ben Baldwin army at his disposal.

“What did they do while you were gone all summer?”

He shrugged his shoulders. “I’m not sure. I kept them on payroll, so I sure as hell hope they kept working.”

“But Nan lives here?” I prodded. “Like Lenny?”

“Yes. You could say she’s like the mother hen of the place. She watches out for me. Sometimes a little too closely, but I’d rather her be dedicated to her job than not give a damn.” He grabbed my hand. “Come on. I want you to see the shower.”

At least there wouldn’t be any more interruptions tonight, but I wasn’t sure I could get used to the fact that my bachelor didn’t actually live alone. Would we ever be alone? Were Nan and Lenny always at the ranch? Tonight probably wasn’t the best time to ask more questions, but I knew this was just the beginning of trying to understand the brand and the world that was Ben Baldwin.

###

Keep reading for three of my absolute favorite books from my friend Violet Paige. If you love bad boys, you’ll love these sexy Texans!

Turn Over

Published By Violet Paige

Copyright © 2017 Violet Paige

Sidelined

Published By Violet Paige

Copyright © 2017 Violet Paige

Dirty Game

Published By Violet Paige

Copyright © 2017 Violet Paige

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places or events are entirely the work of the author. Any resemblance to actual persons, events, or places is entirely coincidental.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. Please purchase only authorized editions and do not participate in piracy of copyrighted materials.

TURN OVER

1

Luke

Sometimes people are wrong. They’re wrong about what the score will be at the end of the game. They’re wrong about what route to run. They’re wrong about who they can trust. And fuck it, they’re wrong about people. Wrong about love. I used to be one of those people. Cynical. Egotistical. Selfish. But all it takes is one second. One split second of your life when you think you’ll lose everything. And suddenly it comes into focus. Faster than I take a snap. Faster than I read the defense. I can see all of it. I can see it being ripped away. In a split second all of it can be ruined. There could be a life where she doesn’t exist. Where the mistakes push her away.

They are wrong about me. And the thing about me is I love to prove people wrong.

***

It was hot as shit on the practice field. The September sun beat down on everyone. It didn’t discriminate between million dollar players or the trainers who took home fifty thousand a year. It was brutal and unrelenting, reminding all of us what it meant to play football in Texas.

Ownership promised we would have an indoor facility soon with air conditioning, but that didn’t do a damn bit of good when my linemen were cramping up on the field and I could barely see from the sting of sweat rolling in my eyes.

I gripped the ball between my fingers, digging into the leather with my nails while the sideline crew ran out to squirt water in the players’ mouths. I didn’t see what good an ounce of water was going to do in this heat, but I waited anyway.

Our rookie tight end, James, walked up to me. “What did you think of that last play?”

“I think it sucked.” I held my helmet under my arm and squirted water on the back of my neck.

I could see him huffing as hard as the rest of the team and he was twenty-two—the youngest guy out here.

“I’ve been asking for pointers since July,” he started.

I didn’t want to hear his excuses or anyone else’s. If you played for the American Football Association, you better have the balls to back it up. James was a top draft pick. He was new to the league, the process, and me.

“You want advice? Get out there and catch the fucking ball when I throw it.” I slammed my helmet over my head, clamping it against my forehead. “Is there anything else you need to know?”

He shook his head, running to the line of scrimmage. I didn’t take on projects, and I sure as hell didn’t take rookies under my wing. They had to learn just like the rest of us had.

This game wasn’t built on kindness. It wasn’t built on friendship. It was built on that scoreboard. When the clocked ran down to zero the only thing that mattered was what number was next to the Warriors’ name. Make catches. Block punts. Tackle the runner. That was their job. If they needed me to tell them how to do that, they didn’t belong on my team.

The Austin Warriors were one of the league’s original teams. You either hated or loved us. There wasn’t a lot of gray area with AFA fans. There were families in the stadium on Sundays who had handed their seats down for three generations.

We were a legendary team. A team with deep roots. A team with history.

Warrior football was everything to this town. And that made me the fucking general. The commander of this army.

I yelled, scattering the conditioning team. “If you want to get the hell out of this heat, let’s finish this practice.”

I could see I wasn’t the only one. The linemen weren’t tolerating the heat. Droplets of sweat beaded on their noses as they took their positions for the snap. We had two more plays to run. Only two. If I could make it through, I could soak in an ice tub for an hour and put this hellish practice behind me.

I could forget the imprint the sun had burned on my forearms. Forget I practiced for the third day in a row hung over. There was too much bourbon last night. I could still taste it in my mouth. The way my tongue was thick. But that was part of the Luke Canton package. I did whatever the hell I wanted at night, but I performed on the field the next day.

I called out the next play, took the snap, and threw the ball long into the end zone. I nodded at James. He caught it square in the chest. It was a perfect spiral.

No one wanted to be out here. It wasn’t glorious or glamorous. It fucking sucked running drills in a hundred-degree heat.

Twenty minutes later I was in the practice facility locker room climbing into a tub of ice. The trainer added another bucket of cubes as I slid my feet to the bottom of the floor.

“How’s that, Luke?” he asked.

“Just keep dumping it in until I say quit.”

The ice was melting against the blistering patches of skin I immersed under the surface. It was both painful and a relief. It was the shock I needed to erase the last fragments of my headache.

I started to settle in, trying to adjust my huge frame to the confines of the tub. It was hard to fit all of me in this cramped space. My dark hair was stuck to my head. I scooped a handful of the ice water and dumped it on my scalp, and shook the water from my ears.

“Canton!”

I whipped my head around. “What?”

“Coach wants to see you.”

I glared at the tight end assistant coach. “Tell him I’m doing a cool down.”

He shook his head. “Doesn’t care. Wants your ass in his office now.”

“Damn it,” I muttered. I considered refusing to leave, but the assistant coach waited in the doorway. I pulled one icy leg and then the other out of the tub and dripped across the tile. I wrapped a towel around my waist, tucking the corner against my hipbone and pushed through the locker room door.

I knocked on Coach Applewhite’s door and walked inside.

His eyes pinched together. “Luke, you couldn’t put any clothes on?”

I stared down at my body. There was a puddle of water at my feet. “I was in cool down, but was told you couldn’t wait. This is what I had on. I can come back,” I offered.

To his right was Mr. McCade. I straightened my back. I had been too pissed at Coach to notice that the owner of the Warriors was in the office.

It was no secret that Coach and I didn’t agree on much. We tried to stay out of each other’s way off the field as much as possible. It usually worked. Until now.

“Since you’re here, why don’t you sit?” Coach nodded toward the couch.

Mr. McCade was easily in his seventies, but none of us knew for sure. What we knew was he was a cheap bastard. He wanted the best team in the league, but wasn’t willing to pay for the facilities or the equipment we asked for. He wanted high dollar players, but negotiations could drag on for weeks. I didn’t have a lot to say to the man. He was my employer, but I wasn’t a fan.

One sweep around Coach’s office and you could see what the McCades thought about funding the management offices. The place looked like it hadn’t been updated since 1985. A row of play manuals lined the bookcase above his desk. There were a few framed family pictures scatted on the top shelf along with a team photo from three years ago. They all needed dusting.

“All right. What can I do for you, Coach? Mr. McCade?”

“I’m going to skip over the inspirational coach’s speech and get to the point.”

“Sounds good to me.” I stared at both of them with eyes just as cold as theirs.

Applewhite sighed. “We’ve got a problem on the team.”

“Yeah, guys are passing out left and right because they’re out of shape, it’s one-hundred twenty degrees out there, and rookies don’t know their routes,” I snarled. “What’s the status on the new indoor practice field?”

“Luke, we’re not here to talk about facility expansion. I’m not talking about the other guys. I’m talking about you.”

I sat there in my towel, waiting to hear what league infraction I had collected this time. Because it wasn’t the first time they had drug me in here with threats about my behavior. I’d gotten the speech fifty times to stop drinking. To stop picking up women. To stop speeding. To stop using my celebrity status to get favors. The thing was I didn’t give a shit. I lived my life the way I wanted and as long as I gave them results every Sunday, they could fuck off.

Mr. McCade cleared his throat before reaching into his suit pocket and retrieving a photograph. “Do you know this young lady?” He slid it across the coffee table.

I picked it up. Pretty girl, but I’d never seen her before. “Nope.” I tossed it on the pile of sports magazines covering the flimsy white wood table.

“That’s not what she claims. She accosted me this morning outside of my home. It was a surprise, especially to my wife.”

If McCade wanted me to feel sorry for him, he didn’t know what it was like living with paparazzi. I couldn’t buy gas without reporters asking for a statement. No sympathy here.

“So?”

“So,” Coach intervened. “She claims you got her pregnant.”

2

Alexa

“Keep still,” my stylist ordered for the third time.

“I’m trying to send out an update,” I explained. It was hard to concentrate on hair, makeup, and social media obligations at the same time when I was in a contorted position.

“Don’t you have a PR person for that?” Helena twisted my hair above my ears.

I grimaced. I wasn’t going to the hospital benefit looking like Princess Leia. “I do, but I try to upload my own pictures when I can. Fans can tell the difference. This is more authentic.”

She clipped my blond locks into place. “I guess that’s why they call you America’s Sweetheart, because you’re just so darn sweet.” She pinched my cheek in a teasing gesture.

“If I hear that one more time…” I rolled my eyes.

“It’s true though. You can do no wrong. Fans love you. The press loves you. I love you.” She smiled at me in the mirror.

“Well, that’s mutual.” I blew her a kiss.

Helena had been with me from my first album cover. The label threw us together, but there was an instant click between us and I hired her on the spot. She traveled with me on tour. She went to all of my press appearances. Some days I had her come to my house before I went out if I knew the paparazzi was going to be snapping pictures of me, which was mostly a guarantee for anything I did.

The sweetheart image wasn’t my idea. The label thought they could sell more music if I was everything that was missing from today’s country superstars. Alexa Wilde, or Lexi, as they started to call me, was born from a list of attributes on a piece of paper and crafted from a manager, tour director, and producer.

When I started I was okay with it. I would do virtually anything to have my songs played on the radio. And if that meant a squeaky clean good-girl image, then I was willing to sign off on that. It didn’t seem like a bad idea at the time.

The crazy thing was that it worked. The label had been right all the way down to the song selections. I sold more albums the first year than any other of its debut artists.

But I was short-sighted. Now I had to watch everything I wore. Everything I said. Everyone I spoke to. It was a nightmare. I couldn’t sing the edgy songs. I couldn’t wear the tight short dresses. They had created the perfect formula and I couldn’t disturb the ingredients. I had to be a role model.

It was like an ironic joke. Me? A role model? What girl would want the life I had before I was famous? If only they knew. But Alexa Wilde was a creation, and no one knew who I used to be. And people seemed okay with that.

I wasn’t sure I was. I hadn’t forgotten where I came from or how my image was born. I wanted the memories erased. The pain. The humiliation. The struggle to rebuild my life. I wanted every trace of the past to disappear. But that wasn’t reality. It was there when I closed my eyes. It was lurking when I fell asleep. I tiptoed through life, scared one day the truth would come spilling out and this dream would be over.

“Lexi, what if we do half up, half down?” Helena asked.

I shrugged, typing away on my phone. “Sure. It’s for the hospital. So whatever is going to make Jake happy.”

“Nothing makes Jake happy, so why even go there?”

“True.” I looked at our reflections in the mirror. “Then do something that will completely piss him off.” I smiled.

Helena laughed. “I don’t want to get fired, but I have something in mind.”

I settled back in the chair while she went to work finishing my hair and makeup for the show tonight.

Jake had set up this charity event for me. It wasn’t often I was in Austin. My Texas tours usually kept me in bigger venues like Dallas and Houston, but this was another opportunity to show how involved I was with children’s fundraising. It was the cornerstone of my platform, and Jake never missed an opportunity to exploit my brand’s generosity.

If I wanted I could probably find another manager. It wasn’t as if I was that scrawny girl begging for nightclub gigs anymore. I didn’t have to beg for another thing the rest of my life. I was Alexa Wilde, America’s Country Sweetheart. America’s poster child for sweetness, virginity, and all things pure. I was the girl you wanted your son to date. I was the girl you wanted your daughter to grow up to be. I was the daughter you wish you had.

After three years of managing me, Jake wasn’t going to let me out of his clutches. Our contract was ironclad. I had it examined when he wasn’t around. I had five more years with him. Until then, I had to make the most of the partnership and ride out my pure and virginal image that sold millions of records.

“Speak of the devil.” Helena rolled her eyes as Jake let himself into my suite. We had rented out the entire top floor of the Austin Gold Hotel. It was impossible to keep my location secret, but at least we could keep things secure.

“You’re not going down there like that.” He moved Helena out of the way to place his hands on my shoulders. “Where did you get this idea?”

I could smell his expensive cologne. He was wearing his standard crisp white shirt and a smug look on his face. Jake had sharp cheekbones and sandy blond hair. He almost looked like he could pass as my brother. His eyes were just as blue as mine.

“I like it.” I tucked a flyaway piece of hair behind my ear.

He shook his head. “No way. Too much eye makeup. Too much sex. Not happening.” He pointed at Helena. “Fix her before I take her down for the hotel meet and greet.”

“Meet and greet?” I spun in the seat. “You said this was a benefit concert only. You know how exhausting these things are before I perform.”

He opened a bottle of sparkling water from the fridge and poured it into a crystal glass. He twisted the cap off and took a sip. Jake was never shaken. Never off his game. My outburst did nothing to change his itinerary. It was a waste of my breath. I knew it before he even opened his lips.

“Your job is to greet your fans. Those people pay to go to your concerts. They pay for your music. Some of them save up every dime of their week’s babysitting money to get your album. So if you have to spend an hour at a meet and greet, then that’s what you’re going to do.” His blue eyes pierced the air. “This is charity, Lex.”

“Fine. Then I’m going like this.” I threw off Helena’s hands.

“Don’t test me,” he warned.

“It’s not a test,” I challenged. “It’s called style. My fans can’t expect the same innocent farm girl act forever. We both know I wasn’t raised on a farm. Styles change. I should change with them. Let me grow with my fan base.”

He huffed. “Sweetheart, you don’t ever have to remind me where I found you.” He threw the water down the sink and straightened his jacket.

My shoulders stiffened. It never failed. Jake would bring up how we met whenever he got the chance. He wanted me to know there was always a card he could play to tug me back in line when I started to step out of the circle he drew for me. Some days the circle was bigger than others. It depended on his mood. I could tell today it was barely enough for me to spin around. I didn’t know what had pissed him off. It we were still friends I would have asked.

My chest tightened. I wasn’t the only one with a secret, but I didn’t know if I had it in me to shred him the way he could rip me apart. What would it take for me to hurt someone like that? Regardless of where our relationship was now, it didn’t start out this way. Seven years ago Jake had given me a chance when no one else would. The part of me that didn’t hate him was grateful for that.

He was the first one willing to take a gamble on me. Somehow it created a toxic relationship where I always felt indebted, and yet resentful at the same time. Whatever it was we had, it wasn’t good for me.

He turned to Helena. “You, get rid of the eyeliner and put her in something knee-length. I’ll be back to get you in an hour.” He pasted a fake smile on his face. “Be ready, babe.”

“Jake…” I called after him, but he pulled out his cell phone and walked out of the room. I hated the way he mixed pet names that should mean something sweet with vicious threats.

He could end me. With two words. Two little words and my career would be over. Everyone would know Lexi Wilde was a fraud.

Jake controlled me and I had no way out.

3

Luke

“What the fuck?”

I stared at her picture. I’d remember a pretty face like that. And yes, I was a womanizer, but I wasn’t a fucking idiot. I used protection for accusations like this one. I knew what women wanted when they got in bed with me, and it wasn’t usually a night of hot sex. They wanted money. They wanted fame. They wanted a way to be noticed.

There were advantages. It kept things light. I didn’t get trapped into relationships. I had freedom. The way I saw it, it was perfect. The women came and went and my status never changed. I had what every man wanted. I learned to be careful.

“Luke, you’re a train wreck.” Coach stood from his desk and paced in front of his windows. They faced the practice field. He could watch us sweat from here while he called plays to the assistants on the field. There was one thing this office had—AC.

“Hold on. I don’t even know this girl. You can’t expect me to respond to this. It happens all the time.”

“And that’s the problem.” He spun around. “The drinking. The gambling. The partying. The women. It happens constantly and it has to stop. You’re out of control. It’s all out of control.”

“I didn’t sleep with that girl.” I gritted my teeth. “She’s extorting you for money. You have to see it.”

Mr. McCade plucked the picture and returned it to the silk lining against his chest. “That may be, but she has a compelling case. And all we need is one woman to come forward to the press, and see how many more follow after her. She’s the beginning of your worst nightmare. How many kids do you think you have out there?”

“She’s lying. She has no proof because it didn’t happen. I didn’t sleep with her.” I paused. I hadn’t missed the last question. “And the answer is none. I don’t have any kids. I like women, but I have no interest in becoming a father.”

“See, Luke what you don’t seem to understand is that no one would believe you. There are more pictures of you stumbling home, than there are of you with nice, respectable women. You have a reputation in this town. You have given the Warriors a reputation. And it’s going to stop.”

I felt the anger rising. I refrained from balling my hands into fists. I wasn’t going to knock out the team’s owner or the Coach, but I was seeing red. One bullshit lie, and they were coming down on me like I had done something wrong. I hadn’t even touched that girl.

“What are you implying?” I asked.

Coach was doing most of the talking now. “There are provisions in your contract for moral conduct.” His eyebrows rose. “We can cite you for violating multiple infractions of the Warriors’ code of ethics.”

I shot up from the couch, almost losing my towel in my rage. “The hell you can.”

Mr. McCade folded his hands in his lap. “You’re a valuable quarterback, Luke, but right now you’re more of a liability to this franchise. I don’t want my family legacy soiled by your antics. The McCades have everything at stake here. This is our team—not yours. This is your last warning.”

I glared at each of them, my eyes darting with fury. “Where’s Linc? Why didn’t you call him in for the meeting?”

Coach pressed his knuckles into the desk. “Your so-called manager? Your brother?”

I nodded. We all knew who Linc was. Applewhite was just being a dick. Linc took care of the business aspects of my life. He should be here getting me out of this damn meeting.

“He has about as much control over you as a wild bronco. He wasn’t invited. This is between you and your contract.”

I was tempted to end the meeting right now. Refuse to talk without my manager present, but it was better to get this over with. I wanted to know where this was headed.

“Spell it out. What do you want from me?”

“Clean up your act. Stop coming to practice reeking from the night before. No more gambling. Hire a damn driver. Choose your friends wisely.” Applewhite rocked on his heels. “And no more women. None.”

I chuckled. “You’re fucking with me now, right?”

“Your contract is in jeopardy. Your position on this team is in jeopardy. The last thing I’m doing is fucking with you.”

Coach reached into the top drawer of his desk and placed a manila envelope on top of his clipboard. I saw my name written on the tab.

“Go ahead,” he urged. “Open it.”

I thumbed the flap, flipping it open with hesitation. I stared at the contents scattered in front of me. I picked up the top newspaper clipping. “What is this?” I questioned.

“Your file,” he muttered, turning his back to me. “It’s every article. Every picture. Every time you were pulled over for speeding and there was a write-up. It’s every headline about noise disturbances from the parties you throw.”

I spread the articles and notes around, digging through the stack Coach or some bored son of a bitch in human resources had collected on me. My life in Austin was compiled into this damn folder. But I couldn’t find anything on my quarterback rating or the numbers I put up every Sunday. There was nothing on my pre-season stats. No, this was a file on the dirty life I lived in the public eye. Austin’s star didn’t hide. He lived fully. That’s what the folder showed me.

“So this is what it’s come down to? No one here has my back? You don’t care how many points I put up on that board out there? What you care about is a fucking stack of newspaper clippings? Unbelievable.” I shook my head.

“We do have your back, Luke. That’s why we’re having this meeting.” Coach turned to his desk and handed me an invitation. “This is for you.”

It took everything I had not to crumple it in my hand. I lifted the wax seal and pulled the linen paper from the envelope.

“What is this?” I could tell from the swirly handwriting it was already something I was going to hate.

“There’s a charity event tonight for the children’s wing at the hospital. Lexi Wilde is going to perform. Go. Make the highest donation. Don’t drink the champagne. Leave alone, before the event is over. Don’t even speak to a single woman there.”

I chuckled. “You expect me to be a monk and you’re taking over my PR now? Isn’t that below your pay grade, Coach?”

“No, I have someone doing that. You have a meeting in the morning at eight. Charlie Maine’s specialty is cleaning up cases like yours. You need to be prepared to report everything from the gala. It’s black tie, so go home and get some rest before you show up. We need pictures of you being a member of this community in a positive way.”

“This town worships me,” I growled. I didn’t need some prick named Charlie to tell me what to do.

“No, they worship the Warriors. Don’t mistake the two.” His nose was almost touching mine.

“And the girl from this morning?” I asked, turning to face Mr. McCade.

“I will pay her to keep her silence, but it’s the last time. If I hear of another one, you’re off the team. I’d rather pay to get rid of you than keep paying off your whores.”

I wasn’t the kind of man to beg, and I was done with this meeting. I’d never met the girl, and I sure as hell didn’t get her pregnant.

“Anything else?” My hand was on the doorknob. There was enough strength in my right arm to rip it off the door. I was angry enough to do it.

“I think we’re pretty clear here. You agree?” Coach asked, smacking gum between each word.

I nodded. “Oh, I got the message. It’s clear.”

I slammed the door behind me, storming to the locker room. By the time I walked in, the place was cleared out. The trainers were gone. The players packed up. And my ice tub was drained.

I shoved the gilded invitation into my Warriors’ bag and got dressed. I couldn’t get out of this shit hole fast enough.

I slide behind the wheel of my truck and pressed the screen on the dash, scrolling for Linc’s number. I backed out of my spot as the ringing echoed in my truck.

“Hey, brother. How was practice? It’s hotter than hell today.”

“Tell me you didn’t know anything about the McCade meeting.”

There was silence. “Linc!”

“Stop yelling. No, I don’t know anything about an ownership meeting. What happened?”

“Applewhite hired some kind of damage control PR expert I’m supposed to work with. Our first meeting is tomorrow at eight. I want you there.”

“You got it,” Linc responded quickly.

“Why do you sound calm about this? It’s bullshit.” I was livid. It felt like everyone was out to hang me.

“Calm the fuck down, Luke. I’m sure they’re blowing smoke. It’s a PR guy, not the league president. I’ll be at the meeting. I’ll talk to him. You have nothing to worry about.”

I stopped at a red light. “They’re threatening to cut me out of my contract.”

That got his attention. “What? Motherfuckers,” he muttered, but it came through clearly on my speakers.

“Exactly.”

“All right. You hang tight. I’ll get someone from the union on the phone. We’ll talk to legal. They can’t threaten you.”

Linc knew if I lost my spot with the Warriors he’d most likely be out of a job. Running my business interests was his only position, and I paid him over a million dollars a year to keep shit like this from happening.

I slowed the truck as I approached the gate to my driveway. I lived on the outskirts of Austin with a hundred acres surrounding me.

“Don’t call the union yet,” I instructed. “Let’s see how tomorrow plays out first.”

My older brother didn’t seem at ease. “They can’t threaten your contract. There are by-laws for this kind of thing. What are they saying you did?”

I pulled into the garage, and put the truck in park. “I didn’t do anything.”

“It’s going to come out. What are they saying?”

“They think I got some girl pregnant, but I didn’t. I’ve never seen her before.”

Linc was silent again. He was thinking. “All right. I’ll take care of this after we have the meeting. They can’t fire you for something you didn’t do.”

“Thanks, man. Look, I’ve got to get ready for some charity event. I’ll call you later tonight.”

“You, charity?” he choked.

“Another one of their damn directives, but I can’t get out of it.” I looked at my watch. I still had to shower and dig through my closet for my tux. “Call you later.”

I pressed the screen to end the call and sat for a second as the cool air escaped the cab. Linc was as invested in my career as I was. I knew I took advantage of him. I trusted him with my money. I trusted him to represent my interests. But most of all, I trusted him to stay out of my way. He never tried to manage me, and that made him the ideal manager.

4

Alexa

“I tried to tell you…” Helena shrugged.

I raised my hand to silence her. I didn’t want to hear it. As long as I was under contract with Jake I was his puppet. I was his slave. I was his Barbie doll to dress and style how he pleased, shoving a mic and a song in my hand.

I watched as Helena started with my hair from the beginning. I knew what would happen. She’d part it down the middle, wipe the makeup from my eyes, and replace the red lipstick with a dab of light pink lip gloss. America’s Sweetheart always had to look the part.

“We could add some charcoal at the corners. It will be a little smoky and sexy.” She tried to make up for it. “With your blond hair it will really pop.”

“Don’t worry about it.” I smiled. It wasn’t her fault. “He won’t go for that either and it’s a waste of time. I appreciate it. Just keep with the peach tones. He likes those.”

“At least you get to wear the leather boots.”

I grinned. The boots were my favorite. And for some reason, they had become an acceptable part of my image. I could wear them with dresses or jeans. It didn’t matter. The brown leather was embroidered with a darker thread of brown, printing paisleys along the side of my calf.

Other than my guitar, they were the most sentimental thing I owned. I had bought them with my first royalty check. A real country singer needed real boots. I had even worn them out of the store, tossing my beaten up tennis shoes in the box before walking out.

“Always the boots,” I agreed.

The boots were my first foray into starting a fashion line. It was a natural fit to start working with boot designers. I had an entire footwear collection called The Alexan.

I was excited about my new venture in athletic wear. Fans always wanted to know what I did to stay in shape on the road. I posted pictures of my workouts. I posed with my trainer. Truth was I had to workout seven days a week to keep this body going.

It didn’t come naturally to me. Once slice of chocolate cake and I wouldn’t be able to slip into my jeans. Besides, it was a good way to spend my down time on the road. Francisco had gotten creative with our routines. The man was like an artist, but with workouts.

From there it seemed like the next step was to see if I could start selling my own brand of sportswear. I practically wore it around the clock when I wasn’t prepping for an event. Next week I was supposed to meet with the designers who had sketches on my new athletic line. My brand was growing rapidly. It wasn’t only about the music anymore. I was in stores. I was in magazines. I had commercials.

Twenty minutes later I looked at my reflection. “Lexi Wilde,” I mouthed, wondering where the girl was who had fought so desperately to get here. Because I barely saw a whisper of her when I looked at the straight blond hair and the pink rosy cheeks.

I had to believe she was somewhere in there and I hadn’t given up on bringing her back.

“Thanks, Helena.” I stood from the vanity and walked to the closet where my clothes were organized by color. I pulled a white, long-sleeved top from one of the hangers.

As I fastened each of the buttons, I thought about why I was in Austin. This was a charity event to help sick children. And here I was pouting about my manager. Angry that I had to do a meet and greet. The guilt surfaced as I sat on the bed to pull my boots up to my calves.

“You ok, Lexi?” Helena asked as she packed her brushes into a black case.

I nodded. “Just thinking.”

She sat next to me. “Don’t let Jake get to you.”

“No, it’s not him. Well, only partially him.” My eyes drifted toward her. “Do you ever feel like we’re in fishbowl? Like everyone is watching us?”

She put an arm around my shoulder. “I see you in that fishbowl, honey. But that’s nothing new. What’s going on?”

I shook her off. “Nothing.” I took another look in the mirror and pressed my lips together. “I’m thinking too much about the concert tonight.” There were things I couldn’t even talk to Helena about.

How could she understand the guilt I felt surrounded by the life of privilege I had built? Was there any way to make it sound as if I appreciated it, but yet was completely burdened by my fame and wealth?

I walked into the living room and pulled my guitar from the stand. I sat by the window, staring out over the city. I closed my eyes, strummed a few chords and let the music I wanted to sing pour out of me. The words I wanted to shout. The sound I wanted people to hear flew through my fingers and my chest as if I needed to get it out before I lost the ability to breathe.

5

Luke

The tie was too tight against my neck, and the jacket stretched against my biceps. I dropped the snarl from my face, tugging at my collar as the back of the limo opened and I stood on the red carpet with a barrage of flashes going off in my face. I plastered a smile so wide from cheek to cheek that even a GQ cover model would be envious.

By the time I made it to the door of the new hospital wing I had posed for fifty pictures and I needed a fucking drink. I headed straight for the bar but stopped when I saw the bartender. She was a hot brunette I had met before. She smiled at me, throwing me a soft wave with her fingers. I remembered those plump lips and what they could do. The only thing was I didn’t remember her name or where we met.

I immediately turned around and looked for something to distract me. Anything to keep me away from her and the bottle of top shelf bourbon she was offering. Fuck.

I didn’t want to be here. Hell, I almost hadn’t come. But Coach had ordered a car to pick me up, and I knew that meeting today was more than a warning. It was practically a death sentence in the league. If the Warriors released me for code of conduct violations, I’d be blackballed from every team. The money would dry up. My legacy would be extinct. I’d never throw another football again.

So I put on the fucking monkey suit. I got in the car. I let the driver deposit me on the red carpet. But this wasn’t over. I wasn’t Applewhite’s bitch. He put me in a corner in front of McCade, but we weren’t done. He wouldn’t always have the old man next to him. Tonight would be the last time he’d tell me where I had to spend my time.

I resisted the urge to walk over to the bar and get the brunette’s number.

“Luke? Luke Canton. Hell, son, good to see you here.” I got a slap on the back from a man wearing an oversized Stetson and a bolero with his tuxedo.

“Yes, sir.” I shook his hand, giving him a solid impact.

“Looking forward to the game Sunday. You give those Sharks hell for us.”

“Oh, I will, sir. I will.” I nodded.

The man’s wife came walking over in one of those floor-length ball gowns. Nothing on her was natural. I guessed there was a thirty-year age difference between the two.

She smiled at me, raking me over with lust in her eyes. “Bob, aren’t you going to introduce me?”

She held her hand toward me, and I saw the rocks lining her fingers. The man must have bought her half the diamonds in Texas. Now I understood the attraction.

Bob chuckled, looking at me. “This is my wife, Vienna. She’s a big Warriors fan.”

I felt the softness of her palm as she slid her hand into mine. “Nice to meet you.”

Her skin was flawless and there wasn’t a curve on her body that wasn’t planned. Her neck was long and slender. She turned her head sideways like a cat as she eyed my chest.

I grinned. Now this was the perfect kind of woman. She already had a man to feed her money habit. She wasn’t looking for fame. She only wanted to fuck. I let my fingers drag across her wrist before I let go.

“Can I get you a drink, Mrs. –”

“Crawford.” She winked. “Yes, a white wine would be nice.”

I looked at Bob. “You’re a lucky man, sir. I’ll be right back.”

I took long strides to a bar on the other side of the room. I didn’t care about the brunette at the moment.

“One white wine.” I slid a fifty across the counter.

The bartender opened a new chilled bottle and handed me a glass. “Anything for you, sir?”

I shook my head. “Not right now,” I shouted over the music.

The Austin Symphony played on the second level of the hospital. The loud sounds of the cello and violins fell over the balcony, dropping on the guests like rain. This wasn’t my kind of scene. I was much happier in a pair of broken-in jeans, T-shirt, and holding a beer in my hand.

If things played out the way I thought they would, Mrs. Crawford would give me the fix I needed tonight. She had the potential to make me forget the stuffy band. The pretentious crowd. The disappointed looks on the donors’ faces as I walked by.

I returned to the couple and handed Vienna her drink. She ran her teeth over her bottom lip. “Thank you, Luke.”

“Sure thing.” I wasn’t known for being a gentleman, but I did know what women liked. I doubted tonight was going to change that reputation. Especially when I fucked Bob Crawford’s wife.

She placed a hand on my forearm. “You know I watch every single game. Bob and I have a box at the stadium.”

“That’s right,” Bob added. “It was my daddy’s. We’re there every home game. Hoping for some playoff games this season, son.”

I hated when people called me son. It was one of those cocky Texas phrases that seemed like it was endearing, but I knew it was damn condescending.

“That’s the plan, sir.” I stuffed my hands in my pockets.

“It’s been a while since we’ve had any luck in the playoffs,” he reminded me.

I didn’t like where this conversation was headed. “New season. New team.” It was my standard answer.

“And the game against the Wranglers?” he prodded.

“You know sir, we don’t get sucked into that rivalry BS.” It was a lie I told repeatedly. We hated that team. The in-state league rivalry fueled hatred between the San Antonio Wranglers and us every season. Conversations like this didn’t help.

Bob slapped me on the back again. The bastard was staring to annoy the piss out of me. I saw the signs for the silent auction, pointing down the hall and away from the Crawfords. I’d have to make my way back to Vienna later in the night.

“If you’ll excuse me. I’ve got to make some bids. Want to make my contributions for the kids. Nice meeting you folks.” I nodded at them and strolled away toward the room with the auction items.

I started at one end of the long room and pretended to scan over the donated items. Each one started with a minimum bid of a thousand dollars. There were golf packages. Trips to Maui. I saw a signed print of the Warriors and walked past it. It was more up-to-date than the one in Applewhite’s office.

I scribbled my name on a set of golf clubs. I looked around for something else. Coach said I needed to win some of the higher dollar pieces to draw attention to my generosity. The whole thing was bullshit. Tomorrow morning I’d have to tell that dick Charlie how much I paid out.

I moved to the next table. There was a diamond ring. Too small for the Crawfords, I thought. There were fur coats. I saw a trip for two to Greece. I sure as hell wasn’t bidding on that.

“Oh, are you bidding on the horses?” a smooth voice spoke next to me.

I turned to see who was watching me. She was cute, but dangerous. I could tell from the deep V-cut of her dress. It dipped all the way to her navel, revealing creamy white skin.

“Just looking,” I answered. My eyes locked on her stomach.

“I love to ride.” She picked up the pamphlet on the stables. “Really ride.” She grinned.

Fuck. Did Coach know this was going to happen? Was this some kind of personal hell he had put me in to test me? The bartender. The hot as shit wife. And now this little sex kitten talking about riding. My cock twitched.

I took a deep breath. “I’m from Texas. We all know how to ride horses.” I bent down to add my name to the list. I didn’t know what I would do with a pair of pedigree horses, but I wasn’t going to walk away. The woman was basically purring on me, coaxing me to place a bid.

“So, if you win the horses, you’ll take me for a riding lesson?” Her red lips curled in a smile.

“I thought you already knew how to ride.” I straightened my shoulders. She was making this hard.

She picked up the pen from the auction clipboard, tore off a corner of the list, and scribbled her phone number on the scrap of paper.

“If you win, call me. You might teach me something new.” She handed me her number and sashayed away, showing me how deliciously curvy her ass was.

I held my spot in front of the horse display, willing myself not to chase after her. Women were falling from the sky tonight. Coach thought he was sending me somewhere safe, but he might as well have sent me straight to a strip club.

What I needed was a fucking drink.

I added my name to a few more of the lists before the lights started to flicker in the auction room. An announcer piped in over the loud speakers, “Ladies and gentleman, if you’d please finalize your bids and move to the main lobby. The concert will begin in five minutes.”

I had forgotten about the concert. Lexi Wilde was performing tonight. I’d listen to the first few songs and then call my driver. I didn’t need to stick around until the end of the show.

She wasn’t my kind of music. All she sang about was falling in love, family, and living out dreams. I knew who she was because she was on every single Texas country station. She was interviewed every night. You couldn’t get away from the girl. Her bright blue eyes and innocent smile were plastered on magazine covers and billboards.

I followed the crowd to the lobby where the mayor of Austin was prepared to cut the ribbon for the opening of the hospital. At least the damn symphony had stopped. I looked up to see long black curtains draped over the side with LW interlaced in white.

I listened to the mayor’s speech, while the people around me bobbed their heads in agreement. I posed for a few pictures with fans and then skirted my way to the front. I stepped off to the side. I figured the closer I was to the star, the less likely I was to be the center of attention.

The lights dimmed and I rolled my eyes as the tuxedo and sequin-clad audience clapped as if we were at a golf tournament. This party couldn’t be duller. I was sober. I had paid a fortune for crap I was never going to use, and I’d lost sight of Vienna Crawford. She probably had to leave early to get her husband tucked in bed.

I pulled my phone out to message the driver as the lights went out. I looked up as the spotlight made a bright white circle at the back of the stage.

It was all theatrics. Even in a small space like this, I could see the way it was choreographed. How Lexi would emerge and the fans would fall at her feet. Shit, there wasn’t much difference between this and running out of the tunnel on the Warriors’ field. The lights. The smoke. The intro music.

I saw this every week. The way the guys huddled together in the tunnel. The way the crowd roared before we took the field.

I felt my chest tighten for a second. I didn’t want to be anybody’s damn circus clown. This entire production reminded me that was exactly what I was. The Warriors were turning me into their own pop princess and I wasn’t going to play their game.

I turned to leave. I didn’t give a shit if Coach was mad I didn’t stay until the end. I had done enough for one night. I shoved my phone in my pocket just as the drums crescendoed and then there was silence, except for one clear note. One piercing note that ricocheted off the walls, and made everyone stare at the stage.

I stopped in my tracks and looked over my shoulder. The spotlight blurred her into a blaze of white, but slowly the lights evaporated like the smoke, and standing on stage was Lexi Wilde.

I didn’t know when it happened, but I pivoted and pushed past the people in front of me, taking my post on the side of the crowd again. I could see over everyone. One of the advantages of being six five.

And what I saw was like white fire. I couldn’t look away. I’d probably heard this song before. I’d heard all her songs, but I always turned the station. I didn’t know what she was singing about, or what the lyrics meant. But there was something in her voice. A pureness I heard without the instruments drowning her out. Without all the electronic manipulation.

And as stupid as it sounds, I thought I saw her look at me from the stage. She smiled with big innocent eyes as she leaned down to touch the hands of the kids they had lined up in the front row. But it was there. A look. Maybe a wink. Her sapphire eyes were shining in my direction.

She held the mic, walking down the stairs and made her rounds through the children. She stopped for hugs. She stopped to take selfies, the entire time singing her song, not missing a single solid beat.

I watched as she took the steps again and stood at the front of the stage. “Hello, Austin.” She waved.

The crowd clapped and I heard the kids making whooping sounds for her.

“Thank y’all for inviting me here tonight.” She grinned at the front row. “Because this is a special occasion. And I’m honored and blessed to be here with you to open the children’s wing of Austin’s Westwood Hospital.” She knew when to pause for the applause. “So, tonight this is a celebration. It’s a night to feel good about what we’ve done for these children, and for all of the children who are going to walk through those doors.” She pointed behind the crowd.

“So don’t be bashful. We have a lot to celebrate. And we still have a lot of funds to raise. Put your hands together and let’s get this party started.”

She began to clap and the crowd was in unison with her. I looked around at the spell she had cast over these people. They were happy. They fucking loved her.

And that’s when I realized there was a part about the football glitz I loved. The flood of adrenaline. The fans chanting my name. The cheerleaders screaming on the sidelines. It was fucking amazing. The rush of football. It was everything to me. And for a split second, Lexi Wilde looked at me and I felt it. I felt that same rush.

And I couldn’t move. I couldn’t turn away. The gentle sway of her hips and the way her eyes lit every time she turned toward my end of the stage captured my full attention. I was stuck. Stuck listening to something angelic in her voice. Stuck waiting for the next song to play.

I followed her legs and those sexy boots as she moved from one end of the small stage to the other. There was something fascinating about Lexi Wilde and I had to figure out what it was. Why I couldn’t turn away. Why I stared. Why I suddenly picked up my phone and needed to cancel my car.

6

Alexa

“Babe, that was beautiful. You were beautiful.” Jake met me at the back of the stage, handing me a bottle of water, and planted a kiss on my cheek. He looked almost as flush as I was.

I twisted the cap and took a few sips. It wasn’t one of my full-blown concerts, but it was an entire set and I could already feel my voice starting to crack. He had pushed me too hard to do the extra meet and greet, and added an interview with the Austin Times.

“Thanks.” I held the bottle against my chest. It started to soak through my white shirt.

“The press is going crazy. You should see the social media accounts. They are blowing up. I can’t keep up with all of them.”

I glared at him. “Jake, these are sick kids. I’m not trying to exploit that.”

“No, you leave that part to me.”

He was like an evil genius I couldn’t control. I didn’t know when the switch had occurred for him. There was a time when he was a friend, a confidant even, but now he was hungry to be at the top. And I was his only way to stay there. He didn’t care if that meant using sick children for photo ops, or offering a free concert for national publicity. He was starving for every headline I could capture.

“What time do we leave tomorrow?” I asked. I rarely knew my schedule ahead of time, but I had been promised a few days home in Nashville. I had visions of sleeping in my own bed.

He steered me toward the side of the stage where we could talk without fan interruptions. “First, we have more photo ops. The mayor wants a picture.”

“Of course she does.”

“And before we take off in the afternoon I have you scheduled to stop by as many of the kids’ rooms as possible. Take your guitar and play a few of their favorites. They’ll want autographs. Meet a few of the doctors. You know the drill, babe.”

“That I don’t have a problem with.” I was about to lay into him about all of the other things he expected of me when my back slammed into something as solid as a wall, but it had arms and a chest.

I turned slowly and looked up. I knew that chiseled face and grin. I had seen those bedroom eyes pop up more than once in the headlines. What was Luke Canton doing here? This was definitely not his kind of scene.

“Sorry,” I eked.

“No, don’t apologize. I was coming back stage to see you. Good show.”

I stared at his massive frame. “You came to see me? You like my music?”

He shoved his hands in his pockets. “I liked it tonight.”

I laughed. “I guess I’ll take that. I just don’t see you as the country fan boy type.” The Warriors’ quarterback was notorious for partying, and I didn’t think any of my songs would make it on to his playlist.

That made him chuckle. “I have a lot of different tastes.”

Jake grabbed me by the shoulders and whispered in my ear. “We need to keep moving, Lex.”

Luke was in front of me, and he didn’t look like he had any intention of stepping out of the way.

“I was hoping we could talk.” His voice was low. “I like what you did up there.”

There was a slight shiver running through my heated exhausted body.

“I have a meet and greet and then I’m free.” I smiled. I could feel the anger rising off of Jake’s neck behind me. “You sticking around that long?” I asked.

“I think I could manage.” Good Lord his smile was having a sinful effect on me.

“Not tonight, you’re not,” Jake butted in. “You’re booked, Lex. Sorry, Mr. Canton. We can certainly put a fan pack in the mail for you. Would you say you’re a size XL?”

I spun around to face my dick of a manager. Jake had sized up the media fallout of this situation in half a second. He didn’t want me spotted with Austin’s most infamous playboy. He didn’t want me speaking to him, have a picture taken with him, and he especially did not want me spending any one-on-one time with him. Three years with Jake had taught me how to predict the way his manipulative mind worked. The panic was written in his eyes. The cameras were around the corner, and if I stepped into view with Luke things could turn into a publicity nightmare for Jake.

I suddenly realized the possibilities Luke Canton presented. I held my tongue, and instead of lashing out at Jake I turned my smile to the tall quarterback. I could have a little fun, and prove a point.

“Sorry my manager is a little rude.” I eyed Jake to put him in his place. “Like I said, I’m free after the meet and greet.”

“Great, I’ll see you then.” His eyes lit with promise and I couldn’t help the slight flutter it created.

I brushed past him with Jake’s ire on my neck, but I didn’t care.

As soon as we were out of Luke’s earshot, Jake hissed, “What in the hell are you thinking? You can’t be seen with him. Not even here.”

“Since when do you decide who my fans are? I thought any press was good press?”

“Babe, we both know there is such a thing as bad press and Luke Canton is the definition of it. He’s the equivalent of a morally deprived man whore. I don’t want you within a five-mile radius of him. Understand?”

I smirked. “Guess that’s going to be pretty hard since we’re under the same roof at the same charity event.” I smiled sweetly. “For the children.”

“I didn’t know he was going to be here, or I would have prepared for the optics. Must have been a last minute addition to the guest list.” He stopped long enough to suck in a breath. “He’s off limits, Lex. Off limits.”

Before he could berate me any further, I stepped quickly into the room where the fans were waiting for autographs. For this event, there was a charitable contribution expected, except from the children. I’d never accept a penny from them. They were the reason I was here. One hundred percent of the proceeds from tonight’s concert and all of my merchandise would be donated to the new wing of the hospital.

This hospital was going to become the gold standard for what children’s medical care should look like. There were aquariums in the lobbies. Rooms full of toys. There was an art studio and even a music lounge for kids to kick back in gaming chairs and listen to music.

No one wanted to bring their child here, but if they did, they knew they were getting the best care in the best environment.

I took my place behind the long table and took a sip of water. There were a dozen different colored markers scattered and a pile of pictures from the cover of my latest album. I was lying in a field of wildflowers. The sun illuminated the blond streaks in my hair, and my guitar was in the grass next to me. I snickered every time I had to sign that picture. It was the day I had a full-blown allergy attack and Helena had to redo my makeup at least ten times. All of it was smoke and mirrors. My entire career was like that cover.

Jake left me to greet the fans. “We’ll talk about this on the ride back to the hotel. Stay away from him.”

“Yes, Dad, and did you want to give me a curfew too?” I grinned sweetly.

I reached for the first picture. “Hi.” I smiled at the woman in front of me, dressed in a silver glittery gown. She looked like she could be one of the hospital’s big donors. I wanted to be extra sweet in case it added to her generosity tonight.

“Who should I make it out to?”

“Betty, please.”

“All right, Betty.” I scribbled my usual wishes for love and music and signed my name.

“It was a beautiful concert,” she gushed. “Just beautiful.”

“Thank you. I’m glad you could be here for the event.” I handed her the glossy photo before the next fan moved forward in line.

I don’t know how many people passed through. I didn’t keep count of the tuxedos or cocktail dresses snaking through the line. I reminded myself I was raising thousands of dollars. My wrist was starting to ache. I had barely glanced up when I heard a deep voice. A solid, strong hand slid my album cover in front of me.

“You can write it out to Luke.”

I cleared my throat. “Anything else?” I wanted to sound casual and normal, but there was something about Luke Canton that stirred something in my stomach.

I had only spent a combined total of two minutes in the man’s company, but I felt nervous and giddy. It wasn’t something I had felt in awhile. I was almost afraid to look up—afraid he would see what he was doing to me.

He leaned toward me. “Depends on how much you can put on one of these pictures.”

I wasn’t going to blush. I refused to let him get under my skin, even though he was blatantly flirting, and I was blatantly returning the cues.

I used the fuchsia pen and scribbled a few lines. I added my phone number at the end, eyeing him as I handed it to him.

His eyebrows rose. “Did you think I was asking for your number?”

“Weren’t you?” I challenged.

“I did pay a thousand dollars for the autograph.”

My eyes widened. “A thousand dollars?”

“It’s for the kids, right?”

I nodded. “Right. For the kids. But still, that’s very generous.”

“Yeah, that’s what they say about me.”

I dropped my eyes to the table. We both knew the things people said about him. It couldn’t all possibly be true, could it?

“And what if I dial this number? Is it going to be a Chinese restaurant?”

I pressed my knees together under the table. It had been a rebellious impulse to give it to him, and I was starting to question myself. Was I really this mad at Jake? Or was I willing to flirt with Luke Canton a little while longer?

“Try it,” I suggested.

He pulled his phone from his pocket and dialed the number. I bit my lip when we both heard my phone ring.

“Not a Chinese restaurant.” He grinned.

“No.”

He looked over his shoulder. He was the last one in line. Jake would be here any minute.

“Want to get a drink?” The way he asked it sounded as if he was asking for so much more than a nightcap at the hotel bar. Even his words dripped sex. Was there ever a woman who turned him down?

I nodded. God, yes. He didn’t know how thirsty I was. Thirsty for something other than schedules and order. Thirsty for a taste of something wild. Thirsty for something dangerous. Dangerous like him.

He leaned over the table. “Here’s the thing. I have to leave alone.”

I looked at him, trying to read between the lines. He didn’t explain what that meant.

“But, I can meet you somewhere as soon as I leave the hospital. Or.” He stopped and lowered his voice. “You could come back to my place.”

The good girl knew what to do. Lexi Wilde would not have a drink with the state’s biggest womanizer. And she sure as hell wouldn’t go home with him. Everyone knew about Luke Canton. I didn’t have to be a huge football fan to know he was the kind of bad boy girls like me needed to steer clear from. Jake wasn’t completely wrong. Luke’s image was the complete opposite of mine. Our paths colliding publicly would be an explosive disaster.

“Text me your address,” I whispered.

He picked up the thousand-dollar autograph I had signed and tucked it inside his tuxedo jacket.

“Done.” The wink he shot at me made something twitch between my legs. I let out a tiny whimper.

“Lex,” Jake was out of breath. He ran toward us. “They need you on stage to announce the auction winners.”

“Oh?” I shot Luke a disappointed look. Getting out of here wasn’t going to be easy and with the way the night was going, it was starting to look impossible to spend a minute alone with him.

“Yes, come on.” He stood impatiently between the table and Luke. “The mayor is waiting for you.”

Luke started to follow us and Jake spun around. “Thank you, Mr. Canton. I can take it from here.”

But Luke wasn’t the kind of man Jake could push around. I recognized that about him quickly.

“I’ve put in quite a few bids. So I’d like to hear Miss Wilde tell me if I’m the night’s big winner.” His eyes traced my lips and I felt them part slightly in response to his heavy stare.

“Oh, well I didn’t realize that,” Jake stammered. Luke had him almost as flustered as he had me.

It was impossible to ignore the effect he had on people. His frame was imposing. His eyes a shocking green. And his body was like a Greek god. The killer smile didn’t hurt either. Standing next to him I didn’t care if he was the Pied Piper leading me down the wrong trail. I only knew I wanted to know what was at the end of that road.

“I’ll join the other donors. Excuse me.”

I watched him walk out of the room as if he owned the entire hospital. He was brash. He was confident. He was hot as hell. And holy shit, I wanted to spend the night with him.

“Jake?”

“Hmm?” He was practically sliding me across the polished floors to get me to the stage.

“Would you be okay if I donated something to the auction? Something last minute the donors could bid on live?”

“Sure, babe. I think it’s a great idea.” He was clearly preoccupied trying to get me up on stage as quickly as possible. He released my hand at the base of the stairs.

I pecked him on the check before I took the steps. “Thank you.” I smiled. “It’s really going to bring in a lot of money for the children. And I think the fans will love it.”

“Sounds good.” He nodded. “A signed guitar? Some of your Alexan boots? Backstage passes for the Christmas show?”

I anchored my foot to the stair and looked at the mayor, then turned over my shoulder to answer Jake. “I was thinking of auctioning off a private concert.” I jogged the rest of the way to the applause of the crowd, leaving Jake with his jaw hanging open.

I looked out into the crowd, squinting through the bright lights. But now that I knew what I was searching for he was easy to spot. There on the sideline was Luke Canton and I hoped like hell he was here to play ball.

7

Luke

I tugged at my neck. The collar on the tuxedo hadn’t gotten any looser as the night wore on, and I had been here longer than I intended. I hadn’t expect to stay for the entire concert, or wait in line for an autograph. And I sure as hell hadn’t planned on sticking around for a country girl to make a fundraising speech, but here I was, doing everything Luke Canton didn’t do.

It wasn’t as if I hadn’t been around my share of beautiful women, because I’d spent time with more than would fill a swimsuit catalog. Lexi Wilde was beautiful, but there was something else about her that got under my skin. That innocent act of hers. That sweeter than honey voice. The way she made everyone around her feel as if they mattered more to her than anything else in the world.

The cynical side of me told me that it was just that—an act. But I couldn’t ignore the curiosity she sparked. I didn’t usually go for the good girl.

I leaned against the wall, watching as she read off the auction items the mayor handed to her. She seemed happy on stage. It fit her. She was a natural performer. The purity in those baby blue eyes almost made me forget what kind of man I was. I wondered if she had that affect on all men.

Did they look at her and think they had a chance? Did they think she was so sweet she could forgive their darkest secrets? Did they hear her voice and feel it? Feel the strength she had to let a man forgive himself? For one night, for one show did they feel like they actually deserved to be with a woman as good as Lexi Wilde?

“All right ladies and gentlemen, I have the winner of the two pedigree horses,” Lexi announced. There was a bright smile on her face as she swept her hair off her shoulders.

I remembered the sassy sex kitten with the V-cut dress and wondered if she were still here in the crowd. I had thrown her number in the trash.

“Can I get a drum roll?” She paused. “And the highest bidder is Mr. Luke Canton.” The spotlight swung in my direction and the crowd clapped. I squinted under the lights and threw a wave to the donors. What was I going to do with horses? I guessed I finally had a use for the empty stables at the ranch.

Lexi seemed pleased I had won. I waited while she ran through the list of other items. The crowd was dwindling and I thought about sneaking out the back. What was holding me here? I needed to leave. I needed to forget that for a few songs this girl had hypnotized me like a siren. I walked toward the table to make my payment for the horses and work out the details on their delivery.

Then Lexi cleared her throat and asked the drummer to give her a beat. “Austin, you have been so generous tonight. And what you’ve done for these children—well, really there aren’t words to express what it means to their families. You’ve touched lives. This money is going to make a difference.” She paused. “But I think we can do even better.” She eyed the crowd, smiling widely. “I want this to be the best auction event this side of the Rio Grade. What do you say?”

The crowd clapped, but they looked at each other trying to figure out what she meant. It was late and most of them had emptied their pockets.

“So, I’m going to throw in a personal Lexi Wilde one-of-a-kind item.”

Suddenly, she had my attention in a new way. I’d already paid a thousand dollars for an autograph. And that was just so I could talk to her and give her my number, but now it sounded as if she raised the stakes.

She spun on her heels, her eyes locked on mine. She held the mic to her pink velvety lips. “For one night, you can have your very own private Alexa Wilde concert.” She waggled her eyebrows.

The men started hollering. Half of them had been asleep until this moment, but with a chance to spend time alone with the star their eyes and checkbooks were wide open.

I looked around the room at my competition, because that’s what they were. This was no different than Sunday afternoon. I stared at the opposition, daring them to try to take me out. Like hell I was going to let one of them outbid me for a date with this girl.

The mayor quickly grabbed the mic from Lexi. She didn’t look like the type of woman who handled unscripted events well. I wondered why in the hell she was mayor of this city.

“Well, this is a surprise. Thank you, Miss. Wilde. I’d say this would be a treat for anyone. A concert? This is beyond generous. Really, I have no words. I’m not even sure where to start the bidding.”

She didn’t have notes on the valuation of this particular item, and I wasn’t sure what kind of price tag to put on it either. A private concert. To be the only one Lexi sang to, even if it was only one song was the kind of experience that could change a man’s soul.

A man in the front row with a red mustache raised his hand. “Five thousand.”

The mayor laughed nervously. “I guess we’re starting the bidding at five thousand.”

I inhaled sharply. I knew how these things went. I couldn’t jump in right away, I’d only drive up the price and show my hand. Years of gambling taught me how to keep my poker face and my bidding hand calm.

“Six thousand!” a short guy near the bar shouted from a barstool. The men were jumping at the chance for a date with her. I saw a few pull out their phones to check their account balances.

That was one thing I never had to worry about. Linc balanced my funds almost daily. I knew exactly how much money I had to work with.

“Sixty-five hundred,” another man bellowed.

The numbers kept rising. Lexi stood smiling and walking back and forth across the stage. It was amazing how someone coated in virtue could generate a bidding war between men. The pissing contest was heating up. The bids were up to twenty thousand dollars. Fuck.

Lexi looked at me, batting her long eyelashes. She was baiting me. Trying to lure me in. She wanted my bid. Part of me wondered if she had orchestrated this entire sham of a donation for my benefit. I didn’t give a shit if it was manipulation or innocence. This was a contest. This was a game, and I was going to win her.

“Twenty-one thousand.” I raised my hand from the corner.

There was a man on the other side of the room wearing an expensive tuxedo. He called to the mayor, “Twenty-two.”

I gritted my teeth. “Twenty-three.”

I saw him take a sip of champagne before calling out his bid for twenty-four thousand dollars.

There was a hush over the crowd. Their heads swiveled toward me. I could cut my losses now. She had my number. This wasn’t the only way I could see her. But as I stared at the man in his crisp tux and looked at that girl on the stage I felt the swell of competition in my chest. I wasn’t going to lose to him. I wasn’t going to lose in front of everyone.

“Twenty-five thousand,” I announced over the crowd’s head.

There was an audible gasp as the spotlight swung back to me. I tried not to squint this time. I wanted them to see the confidence in my eyes. The look of a winner.

The mayor clutched the microphone. “Twenty-five thousand? Do I have any higher bids?” There was a grumbling from the men around me. Most had spent their money on trips and overpriced jewelry for their wives. I puffed my chest forward. “Going once. Going twice…”

I couldn’t tell if she was hoping the high-dollar suit would swoop in and save Lexi from my clutches. She drew out the count.

“Last chance for a private Lexi Wilde concert.” She scanned the audience. “The winner is Mr. Luke Canton of the Austin Warriors.” She put her hands together and the donors followed her lead. “I’d say this is a night of surprises.”

I was used to attention on the field, but this was ridiculous. I put my hands up to quiet the applause. I nodded at them. I heard a few cat calls as Lexi walked across the stage.

“Let’s tell our star quarterback how much we appreciate him,” Lexi shouted into the mic, egging on the crowd.

She was making it worse. “All right. All right.” I tried to step away from the beam of light. I’d rather do a dance in the end zone than have this kind of attention.

Eventually the band started to play and Lexi waved to everyone one last time before she exited the back of the stage in a swirl of smoke. The lights came on and the patrons moved to the front doors and waited for the valets to retrieve their cars.

I hung back, waiting for the singer behind the stage.

She ducked her head around the corner. “Hey, there.”

I shoved my hands in my pockets. “Quite a show you put on.”

She ran her teeth over her bottom lip. “Quite a generous donation you made.”

“Is that what you call it?” I stepped closer.

“For someone who just won a private concert by Lexi Wilde you don’t sound very excited,” she teased.

“Oh, believe me. I’m excited.” The crew bustled around us, breaking down the set and packing up the band’s instruments.

“Lex!” Her manager appeared. “What the hell—” He stopped when he saw me.

“Can you believe how much money we raised, Jake?” she asked. “And so generous of Luke, don’t you think?”

He looked me over. I knew what he thought. He didn’t want me near her. She was his country princess. His star to mold and manage. I got it. But like everything else, I didn’t give a shit what this guy thought. He stood between me and what I wanted.

“Extremely generous.” His lips pressed together. “I think we’re going to have to coordinate with Mr. Canton’s people and schedule the concert for later in the year. I’ll have our people call your people and we’ll set it up.”

“That’s okay.” I slapped him on the back, knocking him from where he was standing. “I think Lexi and I can work out the details.”

“That’s not how it works,” he snorted. “She’s booked solid through the holidays.”

I towered over him. “I just paid twenty-five thousand dollars for a concert. It’s exactly how it’s going to work.”

Jake straightened his tie and turned away. It was obvious there was something he was dying to spit out, but I didn’t know if it was my size or the look on my face that stopped him.

“Okay, that’s never happened before.” Lexi stood with her hands on her hips.

“What’s that?”

“Jake ran out of here speechless.” She held her hand over her mouth and laughed.

“Why is that guy your manager?” I couldn’t help but ask, even though it was none of my damn business.

“It’s complicated,” she answered.

I felt as if I had crossed a line. I didn’t like complicated or long stories. I didn’t usually stick around for either.

“Doesn’t matter. He’s gone. How about that drink?”

“That’s how you want to spend your twenty-five thousand?” she asked.

“Oh, no no.” I shook my head.

“What?”

“I asked you out for drinks before the auction. I have two dates with you.” I studied the V of her throat. I swore her pulse was beating faster.

“Two?”

“Mmmhmm.” I wasn’t letting her out of this.

“You don’t think it’s too late tonight? For the drinks, I mean.”

I laughed. “Where I’m from it’s never too late.”

“And where are you from, Luke?”

I bent toward her, lowering my lips to her ear. “Texas.”

“Is that supposed to impress me?”

Everyone had cleared out behind the stage. She was the last one from her crew. All I could think about was pressing her against the wall and letting my hands have free reign over her. I had never wanted to feel a woman’s lips under mine like this before. I could almost taste them. How soft they would be. The little purring sounds she would make.

I moved closer. “It should.”

“I’m from Tennessee. I guess it doesn’t have the same meaning.”

My hand flattened against the wall over her shoulder. “No it sure doesn’t. Everything’s bigger in Texas.”

I moved in to drag her lips under mine when we both jumped.

“What the hell?” We looked up.

The symphony members had returned to collect their instruments and the cellist had dropped his case.

I cleared my throat and made some space for us to breathe. Lexi’s eyes hadn’t left my mouth.

I slipped my arm around her waist, anticipating her falling off-balance. I inhaled her perfume and her shampoo. God, she even smelled like heaven. I let her go once she was steady again.

Everything about this scenario screamed for me to take her. To find a dark corner and kiss the hell out of this girl. Damn the band or the straggling guests. I could have wrapped her in my arms so fast and felt her heart beat out of her chest. But there was something about Lexi that made me want more than a quickie in the closet. I wanted to savor this woman. Devour her. Drink in every part of her. And I wanted to take my time doing it.

“I guess we’re lucky that didn’t land on our heads.” She giggled. “Maybe this isn’t the best place to be.”

“Maybe not.” I let my fingers fall from her waist.

“And I need to get back to the hotel and change.”

“See you at my place?” I asked.

She bit her lower lip. I took that as a yes and strolled out of the hospital, loosening my tie and throwing my jacket over my shoulder. This night was finally about to get good.

8

Alexa

The driver pulled up in front of Luke’s house. “We’re here,” he announced.

I wasn’t quite ready to get out of the car yet. I fidgeted with my purse and looked outside at the ranch-style home. So this is where Austin’s most infamous quarterback lived? We were far from the city and I looked out of the window, noticing you could actually see the stars in the sky. The front porch light drew moths the size of Texas to its glow.

Did I actually have the nerve to go through with this? It was a drink. He said drinks. Just drinks. I remembered the look in his eyes. The promise of sex practically dripped off his entire body.

It didn’t help that I had baited him into outbidding every man at the benefit tonight for a private concert with me. At the time it seemed playful. It was a way to get back at Jake’s constant pestering. Maybe it had started as the act of a petulant child, but now ... sitting outside of his house there was nothing childish about this.

I could even excuse what I did as charitable, but I wasn’t sure that’s how Luke would see it. I’d never met someone with more testosterone running through his veins than that man. He was determined to win. Determined to show everyone that he could win me.

He wasn’t a singer or an actor. There was no art in what he did. He was an athlete. A competitor. A full-blown conditioned machine who easily brought in as many fans as I did. I realized that might be the only thing we had in common.

“Ma’am?” The driver seemed impatient. It was after midnight. He probably wanted to head back to the city. “This is the address.”

“Right,” I answered. “Thank you.”

I could do this. I wanted to do this.

I stepped out of the car and walked up the stone steps to the front entrance. The Warriors team symbol was carved into the massive wooden doors. I knocked lightly, debating how badly I wanted to go through with this.

The door whipped open and Luke smiled at me.

“You made it.” He even had perfect white teeth. Damn it. Every ounce of him was sexy.

“I did.”

He looked over my shoulder. “Hold on.” He jogged down the stairs and I saw the driver roll down the passenger window. I didn’t know what Luke said to him, but he drove away, heading in the direction of the city.

“What was that about?” I asked.

“I just wanted to make sure he wouldn’t say anything about our meeting. I gave him a generous tip to return in the morning.”

“The morning?” I was struggling to stay calm. He had finally made his intentions absolutely clear.

But the instant I heard it roll off his lips, I felt a deep flutter in my core and my heart started to race. We both knew why I was here in the middle of the night. I was aching for a night like this. God, I needed it.

“Want to come inside?” he offered.

“Yeah, I’d like to see how a football bachelor lives.”

He chuckled over his shoulder. “Like any other bachelor.”

I realized that there was something charming about Luke Canton. He wasn’t just an egotistical football stud, there was humor there. Under the layers of his tough exterior he could be persuasive. He could be seductive. He could maybe even be sweet. I was probably giving him too much credit, but I saw little snippets here and there in his voice, or in the way he guided me through the hospital or here at his house. He wasn’t all about himself. He only wanted me to think that.

I was starting to think that was his brand. Tough. Heartless. Selfish. Who was I to judge? I was here for one reason—to get something I needed. I was the selfish one.

I looked around at the leather sofa and chairs. The flat screen TVs. The saddle mounted over the mantle. This was a Texas man’s dream ranch, complete with an enormous stone fireplace that climbed to the ceiling. I doubted many other bachelors had this kind of lifestyle. Luke picked up a remote and manipulated the lights, the fireplace, and the speakers built into the wall.

“I like the music.” I recognized the song. It was a Texas tune that didn’t get much airplay in the Nashville circuit. The guy was known as a renegade. But he wrote his own music and recorded with his own band. That was practically unheard of in Nashville.

“Thanks. He speaks my language.”

“And I guess my music doesn’t?” I tilted my head sideways. Luke didn’t exactly fit my demographic. He wasn’t a sixteen-year-old girl.

“When you start singing about beer and football and women, then you’ll be speaking my language.”

The women part was out, but I wanted to tell him I wanted songs like this one. Songs that felt gritty and raw. Songs that reminded people of something they had lost—something they were looking for. The music I sang when no one was listening. I wanted people to hear what I really had to say. I had notebooks and journals filled with songs I wanted to record.

“So, basically caveman speak,” I sassed.

“Funny.” He chuckled. “Just when I think you’re sweet, you turn into a wicked little thing.”

He walked over to the bar in the corner. The sides were a deep mahogany and there was a line of barstools covered in black and white cow hide. It looked as if he had every kind of liquor imaginable. It made me wonder how much entertaining he did. I had to remind myself I wasn’t here to dispel rumors about him, or even get to know him. I was here for me. I was here because of what I needed. And Luke Canton was the man who could give it to me.

“Bourbon okay?” he asked.

“Sounds good.” I wasn’t a bourbon girl. I was a vodka girl, but I didn’t drink much before shows. Alcohol made my voice do funny things. I didn’t have any performances planned. A drink or two wouldn’t hurt.

He handed the drink to me and I studied his eyes. There were light flecks of green. He had changed out of his tux and was wearing a shirt that pulled across his chest. His biceps stretched the material around his arms. He had added a pair of jeans. I didn’t know which one made him look hotter. All I knew was that he was unreal. Men like this didn’t exist. At least I hadn’t met one before.

I gulped the sweet bourbon and felt the burn slide down my throat. My limbs tingled and I felt loose in my shoulders.

“Do you have a game this weekend?” I asked. I didn’t exactly follow Warrior football.

“Almost every Sunday. This one is home.” He poured his glass half-full. “What about you? Are you still on tour?”

I guess neither of us knew much about the other’s career. “No. I wrapped up my summer stadium tour a few weeks ago. Now it’s press events before I’m back in the studio for the next album. Of course the holidays fall in there and I have a ton of bookings for Christmas shows and then there’s New Year’s Eve,” I rattled on longer than I intended.

“So this is your off-season?”

I grinned. “Yep. This is the so-called off-season. I don’t go on tour again until next summer.”

He took a sip of bourbon and I couldn’t look away as he swallowed. The tight muscles of his throat moved with each swallow. He licked his lips, and I was dying to see what they would taste like coated in the thick liquor.

Luke grabbed the empty glass from my hand, startling me from my obsession with his lips. “Want to tell me what a good girl like you is doing here?”

His glass was empty too and his hands were free to move to my hips. I froze as he coasted his hands to my ass and dragged me against his body. He was solid and firm. He was a wall of muscle on top of muscle.

“Who said I was a good girl?” I looked into his green eyes. There was mischief there. Playfulness. And a hunger that said he might fucking devour me on the spot.

“Everyone says that.” He cupped my ass, gripping tighter.

“And you? Are you really a bad boy? Or is that just a way to keep your love-hate relationship with the press hot and heavy?” I teased.

I saw the seriousness in his eyes. The intensity as he zeroed in on me. “Everything you’ve heard is true. It’s not an act. I live my life wide-open. No regrets. You should know that.”

“Interesting philosophy.”

“And what’s yours? Love and peace?” he taunted. “Good always triumphs?”

“That’s my image, yes.” I didn’t know why it seemed so important to strip all of that away. I wanted him to see me bare. “But I believe it too. I believe in kindness in people. Love. All of that.”

“I can tell that about you.” His brow furrowed.

I tiptoed away from him, still feeling the indentations on my ass where his fingers had been. I walked around the room, observing Luke’s collection of pictures and football memorabilia.

“You can? How?” I wanted to know. I wanted him to tell me how he had come to the conclusion that I was the same good girl everyone else saw.

He sat on the edge of the sofa. “The way you sing.”

I forgot the picture of him with his arm wrapped around another guy in a uniform and looked at him. “Really? One concert and you know that?”

He shrugged. “Maybe not. But I felt it. I doubt people say that when they see me perform.”

He had my interest. “So the game is a performance? It’s all a show?”

“The game is my life.” His voice hardened. “But I know the fans go to see a show. They want the same thing your fans want. They want to feel something. They want to feel the thrill of winning. They want to feel like they’re a part of something bigger than they are. Why else do people love football so much? Everyone’s a damn expert. Men who have never picked up a ball suddenly know what call I should have made last week.” He paused. “Everyone thinks they know the sport better. And it brings people together. They unite against us. They unite to support us. It makes them feel like they belong.”

My eyebrows rose. “And you think that’s the same as me singing on stage?”

“I saw it tonight. I saw how people responded to you. They want a piece of you. Even that manager of yours. They want to be a part of something bigger—your life—your music—your victories.”

I turned again to the bookcase. Everything on these shelves was related to football. Luke had summed it up.

“My wins are wins for my team.” I picked up frame. “If I have a number one hit then everyone has that hit. The writers, the musicians, the marketing staff, the roadies. It’s exactly like that. And the fans.” I spun on my heels. “The fans feel the win too. Because they know they gave it to me. They made me. They paid for that number one song, so somehow I belong to them.”

Luke was looking at me. I didn’t know him well enough to know what he was thinking, only that we had threaded football and country music together with undeniable lines of heavy cord.

“What do you want fans to think of you when they see you perform?” I asked.

“They’ve already made up their minds about me. Doesn’t matter.” He refilled his glass.

“And you’re okay with that?”

“Are you okay with belonging to your fans?” He turned the question back on me.

“Who is this?” I held up the picture, trying to change the subject. I hadn’t come here to feel trapped. I came here to be freed. Freed the way a man like Luke could release me.

Luke stood. “That is my brother, Linc. He used to play too.”

“Not anymore?”

“No. He blew out his ACL in college his senior year. It ruined his chances in the pros. After three surgeries he finally accepted he was done, but he’s my manager. A lot nicer than yours is too.” He grinned. “And he doesn’t give me shit about anything.”

“Jake has his days.” I didn’t want to remember him either. I was here to escape. Here to forget the chains and the ropes that kept me bound to him and my brand.

“That guy needs to find someone else to manage.”

“And you know something about the music business?”

Luke took the picture from my hand and placed it on the shelf. “I don’t know shit about the music business.”

The air felt thick between us. He would have kissed me backstage if that bumbling cellist hadn’t interrupted us. Now we were alone. No crew. No fans. No benefit guests. Just the two of us alone on a ranch in the middle of nowhere.

I thought about the blanket of stars outside covering the ranch. I thought about how I snuck out of my room to be here. I thought about how this tough, hard man had done everything he could to impress me tonight. And it worked. I was here, ready to fall into his hands.

His thumb ran along my bottom lip. I could hear the raspy voice singing through the speakers. There was so much anguish in the words I felt them pierce my heart. I looked into his eyes, wondering if he heard what I heard. Did the lyrics move him like this?

“Are you a fucking angel, Lexi Wilde?”

I shook my head. “No,” I whispered.

I swallowed hard. My chest heaved with breaths that were struggling to escape. He hitched one of my legs up to his waist and I bit my lip. I could feel him pressing against my thigh. His body wasn’t the only thing that was rock solid.

I moaned a little, the sensations starting to sink in. This was real. It was no longer how much I could dare myself, or how shameless Luke’s flirting was. I wasn’t talking myself into it anymore. I wasn’t pretending it could never happen. The warmth of his body was real. His hands holding me close. The look in his eyes. The intensity of his lust.

“I thought you might be.” He didn’t let go. He let me feel how solid every inch of him was.

“I’m not. Why would you say that?” I searched his eyes. I could barely speak. His hands held me with fire. His eyes with promises.

“When you walked onto that stage with the white lights and that voice … and then you winked at me.”

I giggled. “I did? I winked at you?”

He nodded. “Oh, you’re trying to tell me you weren’t flirting with me from stage?” His fingers dug against my curves and I groaned lightly.

“Not at all.” I shook my head. “I look at all the men like that.”

“Then maybe you are a devil.”

“Maybe I am.” I was almost shaking. Every muscle was tense with anticipation. Agonized with the need to be soothed.

“Want me to call the driver back?” He lowered his head so that his lips barely grazed over mine. I didn’t know how he could draw me in like this. I couldn’t look away. “Because there’s only one thing I want from you Lexi Wilde.”

“And what’s that?” I whispered.

“To fuck you until the sun comes up.” He said it boldly and flatly, but it set every nerve I had on fire. My core tightened involuntarily and I could almost hear the hammering of the blood in my veins.

He had the most beautiful dirty way with words.

“Oh my.”

“Tempted?” he asked.

I nodded my head. He had no idea how tempted I was. Why else did I sneak out of the hotel and drive here? Why did I give him my number? Why did I dare him to bid on a date for me? Why was I doing any of this? He made me lose my damn mind.

I wanted to break free so badly, I didn’t have control. I couldn’t control anything in my life, but I could control this. I could have this night with Luke and there wasn’t anyone to stop me.

Jake couldn’t tell me what to do. I could let my hair be wild. I could smear my makeup. My clothes could fall to the floor. It didn’t matter. It was all up to me. I wanted it so badly I could taste it. I could taste him.

“I don’t want to be the reason the good girl goes bad,” he growled into my hair.

My eyes lifted to his. “Who said you were the reason?”

His mouth crushed against mine as I inhaled the taste of bourbon off his tongue. His lips were only the beginning. I wanted to feel the rest of him. The broad planes of his chest. The strength in his shoulders. The ripples in his biceps. The roughness of his palms, sliding over my smooth skin. I wanted the entire Luke Canton experience from head to toe.

He wrapped my other leg around him, lifting me from the floor and walked down the hall, holding me close. I clung to his neck, kissing him with reckless thirst. With every step he took, I knew I was leaving America’s Sweetheart in his living room and letting him peel back the layers of who I wanted to be.

I was in Austin for one night. By tomorrow afternoon I’d be on a plane back to Nashville. Tomorrow I could go back to being America’s perfect role model. I could hide my inner hellcat. Suffocate the sexiness I wanted to feel. Pretend nothing mattered more than the purity of heart my brand crammed down everyone’s throat, but for tonight I could let Luke give me what I really wanted.

A night where being bad was a good thing. A night when all that mattered was how sexy I could be. A night when I could let a hot bad boy fuck me like I deserved.

He carried me over the threshold of his bedroom and it was dark inside. I could make out large pieces of furniture, and an enormous bed. The blinds were closed, and I knew what was about to happen wouldn’t be something we’d want to share with the outside world. I could be completely free, feeling the protection of Luke’s world around me. The privacy of the ranch. The gated entrance. For the first time I realized how incredible it felt to have this layer of secrecy around us.

He swung around to a panel on the wall and tapped on the screen. The room glowed with dim orange lights.

“Candle light?” I searched his eyes.

“I want to see you,” he growled.

I felt the pit in my core seize with want at his naughty words. He wasn’t the only one. I wanted to see him too—every ounce of his ripped naked body. I didn’t care if it was electric or computerized light. It didn’t matter as long as I got to feast my eyes on him.

Luke dropped me in the center of the bed and crawled toward me. I felt like prey and the lion was prowling toward his kill. His teeth grazed over my collarbone.

My nails dug into his back, desperate to pull the shirt off of him. I tugged the edges, letting my nails drag over his skin as I freed him from the shirt.

I traced the lines of ink running up the side of his oblique. The symbols were interlaced in an intricate design, crawling across his taunt muscle. The tattoo started at his ribs and wrapped behind his back. I wanted to ask what it meant, but I dug into his skin instead, feeding my need to feel the heat of his body.

My fingertips grazed the rigid lines of his bare chest. His eyes darkened, watching me explore his athletic body. He was built for endurance. Trained for strength and power. Every muscle connected to another one just as toned and beautiful as the last. I tried to wrap my hands around his biceps, failing to complete a circle before he maneuvered me right where he wanted me—pinned under him.

I sucked in the air around me. God, he was massive. He was certain with every move he made.

His fingers quickly picked at my buttons until my shirt was lying open. His mouth fired kisses against the tops of my breasts while I squirmed under him, needing more. Needing it faster. Needing all of him in a fury.

“Fuck, you’re gorgeous.” He growled into my neck, as he nipped behind my ear and across my throat.

I moaned when I felt his hand slide between my stomach and my jeans. He twisted my panties against my skin and I whimpered, feeling his fingers rub between my legs. He knew it was my desire for him that had made them.

I was aching. Every part of my body wanting to feel his touch. Wanting the roughness of him to remind me of how alive I was. I needed Luke to let me be a woman. Not a symbol of morality. I wanted the kind of night a man like him could offer.

His lips hovered over my breasts, blowing gently before his teeth snatched the lace of my bra away and my nipples hardened under his stare. I pushed up, shoving them toward his mouth. He clamped against the hard point, sucking and growling while I pressed the back of his head tighter to my chest.

I didn’t care if he bruised me. I didn’t care if he bit me. I wanted my body to feel this tomorrow. I wanted to be able to remember the way Luke made me feel. I liked how he played rough and with intention.

He unclipped the back of my bra, granting him access to both nipples, and threw it across the room. While he flicked one with his tongue, he pinched the other with his fingers, rolling it with control until I screamed for more. The shivers ran through me as he suckled my tits with the fire of his tongue.

He had a wicked smiled on his face.

I arched under him, coaxing him to keep going.

“You’re a surprise, Lexi Wilde.” Even the deep timbre in his voice made me hot for him.

“But you’re not.” I clung to his neck, pulling him toward for me a kiss. His tongue shoved inside my mouth. He was everything I thought he would be. A walking sex machine, with a way to back up his reputation.

“I bet I could still surprise you,” he taunted.

His fingers slid over my stomach and down my hips. He pushed me against the mattress until his knees landed on the floor between my legs, tugging my precious boots off my feet.

“I like these. They’re hot, little cowgirl,” he said as he placed them next to the bed.

He tucked his fingers inside the waistband of my jeans, peeling them off my thighs until they were piled on the floor.

The first kiss started at my ankle and then moved to my calf. His hand pushed my opposite thigh wide as he kissed up the other leg. I felt the thrill of what was about to happen. I tried to steady myself, but by the time he was against my center I was panting in bursts of want.

He licked his lips. His eyes bore down between my legs like the hungry lion he was. “You should know ever since I saw you on that stage this is all I wanted to do to you.”

I groaned. “What? What did you want to do?” My voice was raspy, unrecognizable, and sexy.

“Lick you. Suck you. Dip my tongue inside you. Taste you come in my mouth.”

I’d never felt so exposed, or so turned on. His hand pried the white satin away from my folds. The satin was soaking wet. I heard the fabric rip as his hands tore into the lace at my hips. Holy shit. All I could do was wait as he prepared to devour me. One hand splayed across the flatness of my stomach while the other pushed my other knee wide and then with lightning flicks his tongue plunged in and out of me.

“Oh, God.” I writhed under him wildly.

He circled my entrance, tasting and sucking. Licking and kissing against my clit. The more I tried to move, the lower his palm pressed, pinning me to his bed. The ache was so deep it was painful. I wanted the release. I wanted him to lick me into the most explosive orgasm of my life. I rocked into the rough stubble of his face, while he dipped and twirled his tongue. The sensations ran through me like electric pulses.

I couldn’t hold off any longer. I didn’t want to. I wanted the feeling to clutch me and blind me with ecstasy. I grabbed his head, threading my fingers through his dark hair. I throbbed from the inside out.

“Luke,” I whimpered. “Oh, God. Please. Please. I’m going to come.”

He drew a slow lick upward. “Show me,” he demanded.

I looked down as his eyes locked on mine. I could see the lust in his eyes, and I couldn’t look away. My hands lost control as I grabbed my nipples and rubbed my breasts harder as the waves jolted through me. Each one was harder than the last. I felt the vibrations of his growl as he coiled his tongue deep inside, driving my orgasm to the surface.

Luke clamped against my clit, daring me to break the stare, but I couldn’t. I wanted him to see me come. I wanted him to see what my body could do. I wanted him to know I was sexy and alive, and for tonight I was his.

9

Luke

I kissed the inside of her thigh, my cock was so hard I thought it could split through my jeans. The way she came in my mouth was enough to make me lose it. I don’t know why I thought she’d taste like anything other than sweet sugar. She was heaven against my tongue.

I unzipped my pants and shoved them off my legs.

I kissed the soft skin around her navel, moving my lips over her breasts. I slowly licked her tits.

“I want to fuck you.”

Her eyes flickered. “That’s why I’m here.” Her nails scratched along my back, and all I could think about was sinking into her. Rocking her hard little body into oblivion.

“My way,” I explained. “No rules. No lines.” I bit on her nipple, waiting for her to cry out, but she mewed with pleasure.

Lexi was a fucking goddess. She had no idea what she was doing to me. The sounds coming from her throat made me hard. The way her lips parted fucking tore me in half. I wanted to kiss her, but I also wanted to see them wrapped around my cock.

“I want your way, Luke.”

I reached for the nightstand and grabbed a condom from the drawer. I ripped the corner with my teeth.

“Wait.” She stopped me.

Her hands immediately wrapped around my erection, rubbing and massaging me with gentle pumping motions.

I leaned back on my heels, feeling the warmth of her hands and her thumb press against the sensitive spot under my tip. She spread the dew over the head and pumped some more until I knew I didn’t want any more foreplay. I wanted to be buried inside this girl.

I picked up the condom from the bed and handed it to her.

“Necessary evil.” I winked.

She rolled it on effortlessly and I didn’t have any control left. I could taste her on my tongue. My cock was pulsing to get a taste of her too.

I settled between her legs, spreading them wide. She was wet and ready for me. The first orgasm had been for her. The next one was for me. I rubbed my tip over her clit, drawing a moan from those sexy lips and plunged into her sweet, soaking entrance with one long stroke.

“Fuck,” I growled, feeling her stretch around my dick as I drove my cock home.

She tipped her hips upward, clenching around me, pulling me deeper, dragging me toward her lips.

I kissed her furiously while I moved in and out of her. With every thrust she tried to hold me inside and I resisted her, sliding out to do it again. Her hips rocked and tipped under me.

“I want to ride you,” she breathed. “Let me, please.”

I rolled on my back, pulling her on top, marveling at her gorgeous body. It was a damn shame she was always covered up, because she had the tits of a goddess. I watched them bounce as she rode me, moaning and grinding into me.

“This is so intense like this. You’re so thick. God, Luke.” She leaned forward to kiss me, lowering the points of her breasts against my bare chest. My arms wrapped around her small waist, gripping her round ass. I loved it. I loved how she fucked me. How she kissed me. How free she was with her body.

Lexi Wilde was nothing like what I thought she’d be. I invited her to my place, thinking I was in for a chase. A night of seducing the quiet good girl, but God, she rocked my fucking world.

She sat forward pressing against my chest and arched backward, her tits pointing toward the ceiling as I slammed her down on my cock.

“Oh, God, Luke. Fuck me. Fuck me again like that.”

I couldn’t stop. She bounced up and down with the rhythm from my grasp.

She had lost control and taken me with her. I brought her down with sudden force as I felt my body split with shockwaves of violent pulses. I sat upright, clutching her sweaty body to mine. Her breasts slid against my chest while she rode me wildly and I pushed up inside her, feeling her come undone in my arms.

“Ride me, baby. Ride me, harder,” I commanded her, but she was dripping with sweat. Riding my cock, and clutching my neck with desperation as our orgasms hammered through both of us.

I couldn’t remember the last time I came with a woman. I couldn’t tell you the last time I cared, but the power of holding her in my hands while I pulsed deep inside her was intoxicating.

I kissed her, forgetting for a second this was a one-night stand. And this was just a one-time fuck. I kissed her like it meant something. Like she mattered. Like she had just given me the best fucking night of my life.

She leaned back in my arms, and I licked the sweat on her neck. Sweet and salty. I liked that.

Her eyes opened. The innocent look was still there. The one that the public had fallen for. The one she had given me when she was up on that stage tonight, but now I saw something else. There was more sensuality in this girl than I could describe. With her legs wrapped around me, my arms circling her waist, and my cock still inside her, I didn’t want to let go. I didn’t want to untangle our limbs and let her out of my bed.

She pressed a kiss to my lips. “I don’t know what to say now,” she whispered.

“I’m not big on talking.” I bit her shoulder playfully.

“What I said earlier...” Her nails dug into the small of my back and I felt chills run up my spine.

“About what?”

“About you not surprising me.” She bit my lower lip, pulling it with her teeth. Fuck. She was a tiger in bed. “I was wrong. Completely wrong.”

“Lexi, you are nothing like I thought.”

“Alexa,” she corrected me. “You can call me Alexa. My fans say Lexi. I want you to say Alexa.”

“I think I count as a fan.” I slapped her on her ass, knowing I might have left a mark. “I’m a fan of this. And your lips. And your long legs. And everything between them.” I waggled my eyebrows. “But I like Alexa.”

She smiled, trying to wiggle out of my hold.

“Where do you think you’re going?” I secured my hands, clasping them together. She wasn’t getting away.

“Well, I thought you were probably…” she didn’t finish her sentence. My mouth covered hers, sucking the air from her lungs. Kissing her until she felt how my body responded to her.

My cock was growing hard again. She drove me wild. Her body was better than my best brand of bourbon. She was ecstasy in my arms.

“Oh?” She looked surprised. “You keep proving me wrong.”

I rolled her on her back. “I don’t know what you’ve heard, but tonight I’m going to fuck you like I want. Understand?”

She nodded emphatically. I reached into the drawer for a second condom.

“What time did you tell the driver to come back?” she asked.

I pulled one of her nipples between me lips, flicking my tongue back and forth. I looked at her. “Six.”

I sat forward to roll the condom on. I was already hard and we both knew our night was ticking away. In two hours the car would be in the driveway.

She wrapped her legs around me, pulling me toward her like a vise grip.

I sank into her, bowing her off the bed. I pinned her wrists over her head and pumped in and out of her. The sweat pooled between us, our bodies slick with sex and heat. This time I didn’t let up until she screamed my name.

I growled, biting at her. “Say it,” I commanded. “What do you want from me, Alexa?”

Her head rolled back. “Fuck me harder. Don’t stop. Please, don’t stop.”

The words triggered something primal in me. I thrust deep inside her as I felt my release rise to the surface. It catapulted through me with wicked force, ripping through my legs. Tearing through my body until I was so deep in her, I owned her. She was mine. Every inch of her beautiful skin. Her gorgeous breasts. The heat between her legs. It was all mine.

“Oh, God, Luke. Don’t stop.”

“I won’t,” I promised, pushing her knees wide so I could hit against her inner walls.

She screamed out, as her orgasm wracked her body with shakes and vibrations so intense I felt it wrap around my cock.

“Fuck,” I roared, slamming into her as my release coiled from my spine and fired through my body. She pulled me under, spiraling us into an orbit of pure sin I’d never felt so fucking intensely before.

I kissed between her breasts and then collapsed on top of her in a heap of useless muscle.

I felt her fingers trace the lines on my back. But soon I was asleep, never having felt so fucking satisfied in all my life.

***

I rolled over. The covers were flat. “Alexa?” I rubbed the sleep from my eyes. It was still early. There was barely any sunlight outside.

I checked the bathroom. Her piles of clothes were gone. The boots were missing.

“Alexa?” I walked down the hall, then looked up at the clock in the kitchen. “Fuck.”

It was six-thirty. She had left half an hour ago and I had slept through it.

I walked back to my room and fell onto the bed. The pillow smelled like her. The sheet, the comforter. My whole damn room smelled like Alexa Wilde had been here.

I rolled on my back, trying to make myself go back to sleep, but I knew it wasn’t going to happen. Last night was imprinted on my bed. It was in my pores.

My phone was on the nightstand. I picked it up to send her a text.

Good morning

I waited for her to text back. I stared at the screen, cursing myself for giving a shit. It wasn’t as if last night was different than any other one-night stand. I’d had plenty of beautiful women. But the longer I stared at my phone, the reality started to sink in that last night didn’t feel like those other times. Alexa was different. Taking her to bed was different. We shared something. And I never shared.

Didn’t want to wake you up

I grinned when I saw my phone light up. I sure as hell didn’t want to admit I felt a sense of relief in my chest.

When do you leave Austin?

What the fuck was I doing? Was I asking her out? I didn’t know. I had a meeting this morning. I had practice this afternoon. With my luck, my new Warriors’ PR parole officer would assign some kind of high-profile community service for me, parading me around town promoting the team’s good name.

This afternoon

And then I realized I didn’t give a shit what Charlie or Coach had planned for me today. I was Luke Canton. I did what the fuck I wanted.

Drinks before you go?

I sat on the edge of the bed. I put it out there. She could say no and that would be the end of it. I’d erase her number from my phone and never speak to her again. Or she could say yes, and I’d do something I’d never done before.

Yes, I’ll call you when I get my first break. I’m at the hospital all morning.

The answer hit me in the chest. I wasn’t sure it was the right answer, but it was the one I wanted her to give me. After last night all I wanted to hear from those perfect lips was yes. I’d had one taste of her and I knew that wasn’t going to be enough.

10

Alexa

If I thought I could sneak into my hotel suite with a pair of shredded underwear in my purse and no explanation for where I had been the last five hours, I was wrong.

I looked at my boots, remembering how seductively Luke had removed them. No matter what was on the other side of this door, I’d never forget last night.

Jake was waiting inside the suite with a look that could kill.

“Where the hell have you been, Lex?” Even this early in the morning I could smell his expensive cologne. He looked clean-shaven and there was a touch of hair gel on the side of his short cut. Without a doubt, he was always the best-dressed man in the room.

“None of your business,” I snapped. That probably wasn’t the way to get on his good side.

I didn’t want him to ruin the feel-good adrenaline still coursing through my veins. My night with Luke was the greatest high I’d felt in at least a year. I wasn’t sure my body was back on this planet yet. Luke had taken me somewhere last night I hadn’t known existed. There was no way in hell I was going to let Jake spoil it.

He shoved his phone inside his jacket and stood to face me. “Babe, you scared me. You didn’t answer your phone. You didn’t tell your security. I’ve been here the whole time waiting for you to get back. This could have been something serious. I was this close to getting the authorities involved.” He pinched his fingers together.

I recognized there was a real look of worry on his face, but I also knew that it would quickly turn.

“I’m sorry,” I apologized. “I was out with a friend. I needed some time to think.”

“Think?”

I nodded. “Yes.” I crossed the room, going straight to the fridge for a glass of orange juice. “I’ve tried to talk to you lately, but you don’t want to seem to listen. I needed a little space.”

“I’m listening now. What made you stay out all night?”

I stood behind the counter. “I’m tired, Jake. This schedule you have me on is insane. And the fans want every bit of my energy. It’s taking a toll on me. I can’t keep going like this. Don’t you see it?”

He nodded as if he were considering my statements. “You and I both know this could be gone in a flash. You have to ride it while you’ve got it, Lex. It can be pulled away with one misstep. One scandal.”

I rolled my eyes. “Seriously. That is dramatic.”

“You side-stepped one last night.” He eyed me. “Thank God there are no pictures of you and Luke Canton together. I don’t know what he was doing at a charity event. That’s definitely not his scene. Maybe if it was a charity for hookers.” Jake laughed at his own joke. “Point is honey, a picture with him, the wrong headline and your good girl image is ruined.”

“And so what if it is? Why can’t I be sexy? Why can’t I wear what I want? Sing what I want?” I don’t know where I found the energy to argue with Jake. Every muscle in my body was sore and I wasn’t sure my clit wasn’t still vibrating. “Hang out with bad boys if I want?” I was definitely pushing it now.

Luke was everything I thought he would be and more. Last night was still seeping through my body, lingering on my clothes, painted on my swollen lips.

“You, sexy? Come on. That was never the plan. You are the sweetheart. The good girl. The role model every parent wants for their child.”

“I wasn’t when you met me.” I eyed him. “I never asked to be a role model.”

He raised his hand. “Shut up, Lex.”

“Yesterday you threw it in my face, but now we can’t talk about it?”

He closed his eyes. “I shouldn’t have said anything.”

I took my glass of juice with me and walked into the bathroom. “I’m going to shower. I’ll be ready to go to the hospital soon.”

“We’re not done with this conversation,” he warned.

“We are.” I closed the door in his face and turned for the shower.

At some point Jake would corner me again. There would be a time when we’d have to come to an understanding about the future of Lexi Wilde.

But that time wasn’t today. I had drinks planned with Luke later, and that was about all I could think about right now. I needed one more look in those green eyes before I left Texas. It was stupid and irresponsible. It was exactly the kind of thing Jake said was forbidden for my brand. But after last night, I didn’t care about my brand. Maybe Lexi Wilde needed a new brand.

***

I closed the door to room 214 behind me. I had played the little girl’s favorite song, “Hearts and Tears.” Some of the children were here for short-term treatment, but others, like the one I had just visited would be spending months under this roof.

I clung to my guitar and moved to the next room. I knocked lightly and pushed the door open.

“Hey, there.”

“Oh my, gosh,” the little girl squealed. “Is this for real? Are you really here?”

I walked over to her bed, careful not to touch any of the wires or tubes running into her arm.

“I’m Lexi. What’s your name?” I leaned in for a hug.

“Grace.” She was maybe eight.

“Well, Grace. I wanted to play a song for you. How does that sound?”

The giggling started and I didn’t know if she could stop long enough for me to get a song request from her.

“Can you play ‘Hearts and Tears’?” she asked.

“Of course.” I smiled. It was the fourth time I had played it this morning, but it didn’t matter. I wasn’t the one sitting in a hospital bed. I was healthy and strong, living my dream.

By the time I played a few songs for Grace, Jake was tapping on the glass window, motioning for me to wrap it up. I gave her a hug and waved good-bye.

“What is it?” I asked. “I was in the middle of talking to that little girl.” I was annoyed that even when I was doing what he wanted, it wasn’t enough. Jake pushed. He pushed too much.

He turned toward the nurses’ station and I saw what he was worried about.

My heart stopped. My breath caught in my throat. For a second, I didn’t think I could talk. I clutched my strings, making an awkward squeaking sound with my guitar.

“Shit,” I muttered.

The six five sex-on-a-stick that had licked me until I came last night was walking my way.

“Hey.” He grinned. That killer grin that had me purring under his tongue last night. I wasn’t sure it wasn’t happening again. I could already feel the tight coil in my belly.

“Hey.” I smiled.

“Mr. Canton, good to see you again,” Jake greeted him nervously, but he had already fallen into the background. All I could see were the flecks of green in Luke’s eyes. I remembered the way his flesh felt rubbing against mine. His mouth sucking every curve of my body.

“You too.” Luke nodded, but didn’t look in my manager’s direction.

“If you don’t mind, I thought maybe I could join you while you visit the kids.” He looked at me expectantly.

My eyes widened. “What? You want to do visits with me?”

He shrugged. “Why not? I’m sure there might be a Warrior fan or two in here.”

“Oh no.” Jake shook his head. “We have a tight schedule. We have a hospital photographer. I think we’ll have to coordinate something another time with the Warriors. This is not a joint event.”

I ignored his warnings and his stupid excuses. “I think the kids would love it.” I smiled at Luke. “I know for a fact there are Warrior fans here.”

He glared down at Jake. “You heard her. The kids will love it.” He towered over him, and Jake took a step back to get out of our way as we moved to the next room.

“I think you scared the shit out of him,” I whispered before we walked inside.

“Good.” He winked. “He’s an asshole.”

“True, but seriously what are you doing here? I thought we were meeting after I finished here.”

He ran his thumb across my lower lip and I couldn’t breathe. He held me with his stare. With his gaze. My hand was glued to the door, but I couldn’t move. I wanted to suck his thumb into my mouth. To hell with the fact we were in a public hallway.

“I couldn’t wait that long,” he responded with a sexy smirk.

I didn’t know what was right or what was wrong about him, but I knew then that somehow Luke Canton was going to turn my life upside down, and it scared the absolute shit out of me.

I nodded. “Ready to sing?”

“Oh I don’t sing. I sign things. Hats, shirts.” He patted a bag over his shoulder. “I brought some kid-sized footballs. They love these things.”

I laughed. “Well, let this be your introduction into the entertainment business. These kids are going to hear Luke Canton sing.”

“Alexa.” His voice was firm.

I liked how it sounded over my ears. It reminded me of last night. Of the things he said to me. How commanding he was. How sexy and hot he was in his room. How I did what he asked in his bed. I didn’t say no once.

I smiled widely, pushing the door open. I didn’t give him a chance to back out. It was fun to make the big strapping quarterback squirm.

“Hey, there. I’m Lexi and this is my friend Luke. We came to say hi and sing a little for you. What’s your name?”

Luke stood next to me. I could feel him beside me. The heat emitting from his body.

“Daniel.”

“You like football, Daniel?” Luke reached into the bag and pulled out a foam ball about six inches long. The Warriors logo was painted on all sides.

The boy shook his head. “I do. And I love Lexi too.”

I smiled. “Thank you.” I bent over his bed to hug him. “You’re so sweet.”

Luke signed the ball and tossed it so the boy could catch it. “Nice grip you’ve got.”

I’d never seen a child smile like that. Clearly, I was taking a backseat to Luke.

“Really? Do you think I should play? My mom won’t let me, but maybe if you talked to her…” Daniel’s eyes were wide.

“She won’t let you play? That’s bull—”

I quickly elbowed him in the side and glared at him.

“I mean. That’s a shame.” He tried to cover up his mistake. He was an expert on a lot of things, but kids weren’t one of them.

“But could you talk to her? She’ll be back any minute.”

Luke nodded. “Sure, but I’m not making any promises. Mom’s make the rules sometimes.”

I smiled. “How about we play a song until she gets here? Any requests?”

Daniel looked at the ceiling, sorting through his choices. “Can you play ‘Heaven Sent’?”

“Of course I can. Let’s see if Luke knows the words.” I eyed my new duet partner as I settled on the edge of the bed and propped my guitar on my knee. “Ready?”

“Ready.”

After three songs we said goodbye to Daniel and his mom Stacey. She followed us to the door.

“Thank you.” She squeezed my hand.

“You’re welcome. I hope it cheered him up.”

She leaned closer to us. “He’s on the transplant list. We’re praying for a miracle.”

I closed my eyes. I had no idea Daniel’s condition was so desperate. “I’ll pray for you too.”

Her gaze drifted to Luke. He shifted on his heels. I could tell he was uncomfortable. He shoved his hands in his front pockets. “Ditto,” he mumbled.

“Thank you, both. Thank you so much.”

“Is there something else I can do? Anything else?” I didn’t want to walk out of this room with a little boy fighting for his life and powerless to help.

Stacey gave me a grim smile. “This will be something he’ll never forget. Never.”

I pulled her into a hug. Music could heal people. It brought them together, and today it had brought Daniel and Stacy into my life, but there wasn’t enough music in the world to promise him he’d get his transplant in time.

“Take care,” I whispered in her ear.

I turned reluctantly, knowing there was another child in another room waiting to hear me sing.

I felt Luke’s hand on my shoulder. “You okay?”

“I wish there was something else we could do. It doesn’t seem like enough.”

“For the kid?”

We stopped in between rooms. A nurse walked past us. She kept stealing glances at Luke. I studied the funky artwork on the wall. Even with sadness around us, there was hope and light in the halls.

“Yes. I want to do something.”

“You made him smile. That’s something. What the mom said is right. He won’t forget today.”

“I think you had something to do with that too.” I grinned.

Luke looked away. “We have some more to see?”

I nodded. “The entire hallway. But you don’t have to. It’s okay if you need to leave. I understand.”

He shook his head. “No way. I’m just starting to learn these songs. And at least now I know if I get injured I have an alternate career.”

“And what’s that?”

“Lexi Wilde’s backup singer.”

I burst out laughing. “Okay, let’s pray you never get hurt.”

I tapped on the next door and we started our show all over again.

***

Luke walked me to the parking garage after we had visited every child on the floor. I promised Jake I’d meet him at the airport. There wasn’t much he could say in front of Luke, and he begrudgingly let me walk away. I wasn’t sure where we were headed. Drinks at his place again sounded perfect.

I hoped drinks was code for more mind-blowing sex.

“I can’t believe you got me to sing.” Luke puffed out his chest as if it restored some of his masculinity.

I laughed. “I think your voice is adorable.”

“Adorable?” he huffed. “There is nothing adorable about me.”

“Why? Because you’re a strong, domineering quarterback?” I challenged.

I didn’t know why I was provoking him, only that the hours we spent upstairs not touching, drove me insane. I wanted him more than I wanted him last night. I sang, knowing his eyes were on me, burning into my skin, and reminding me of everything we did together.

He pulled me against his chest, pinning my arms behind me, roughly. “Call me adorable again,” he dared me.

I studied the strong jaw, the cut of his cheekbones and those green eyes that haunted me all day. “Adorable,” I whispered. “You’re adorable, Luke Canton.”

His lips crashed on mine, and his mouth moved wildly, sucking, biting, twining his tongue deep in my mouth. He let go of my hands as I reached up to wrap them around his neck. His hands snaked under my shirt, clawing at my back.

“Oh, God,” I moaned. I was going under again, being pulled by my animal need for him.

He bit my lip. “Can we go back to your place?” He nipped at my throat, grabbing a handful of hair at the nape of my neck.

“I checked out this morning.” I breathed. I looked around for a place to hide. A place to be with him. But we were in the bottom of a parking garage. There was nothing down here but concrete and cars.

“My place.” He kissed me harder, reminding me how tender my lips still were from last night. It was a beautiful kind of torture.

I nodded. “I have some time before we fly out.” I couldn’t let go, though. My lips were seared to his in a heated kiss. I swear there was fire in his lips. They were glazed in cinnamon.

Somehow my one-night stand, my one night to fly my hellcat sex flag, had slowly started turning into something else. Luke had compassion under that tough exterior. Under the tattoos and the chiseled muscle he wasn’t selfish. And as much as the bad boy image had drawn me to him, I knew the new things I was learning about him were the reason I wanted to stay longer. There was more to him than the dangerous fire he lit inside me.

I clung to him, wanting all of it. The kisses. The fucking insane sex. I wanted my body gliding over his. We had to get back to the ranch before we both burst into flames.

“Luke, I want you,” I whispered.

“Me too. Last night all over again,” he growled, his hands dragging through my hair. “I want to fuck you here, Alexa. Right here.”

I moaned, feeling him press his erection against my hip bone. He was hard as steel. Steel that knew no limits. I wobbled on my knees thinking of how he could use that steel to make my toes curl. To make my limbs tremble. To make me claw out for more.

“Take me home, now,” I urged.

And then we both heard it and saw it. The flashes. The clicks. We had been so lost in our own world we hadn’t heard the footsteps or the whispers.

We froze. I stared into Luke’s eyes. Whether we wanted it out or not, the world was getting ready to find out I kissed Luke Canton in the basement of the newly christened children’s hospital.

“I’ve got this,” he whispered.

He threaded his fingers through my hand and pulled me behind him.

“Come on, I’m parked over here.” He took off, tugging me after him. I ran, trying to keep up with his long stride.

But we could hear them. The press was behind us. I thought they had left through the front entrance of the hospital after I posed with the nurses and doctors. It was the final picture. Jake had checked to make sure they had cleared out before he let me venture near the parking garage, but somehow they had outsmarted my devilish manager.

“Lexi!”

“Luke!”

“Are you two dating?”

“How long has this been going on?”

“Lexi, do your fans know?”

“How are they going to feel about this?”

I felt his hand clamp down harder on mine as we got to his truck. He unlocked it with his remote, shuttled me into the passenger side, and we peeled out of the parking garage. I didn’t know what to say, and looking at Luke I realized what he meant last night when he said he didn’t talk.

We both stared at the road, neither one of us able to come up with the first words. I didn’t know what I felt. The shock had wrapped around my body. Luke still held my hand tightly, while he drove with the other on the wheel. That felt like something. He was some kind of anchor. But was it the kind that was going to make me sink?

My phone started to light up with texts and phone calls from Jake, but I hit ignore. I’d never cut him out like this before. I could imagine the things he was thinking. The things he would say if I answered.

I needed time. And right now I needed Luke.

11

Luke

Fuck.

Alexa was terrified. I didn’t have to know her long to see every glimmer of fear reflected in her eyes. I stared ahead at the road. The only thing that broke the silence was the sound of the cold air whirring through the vents as I drove us farther outside of Austin.

It had been a fucking ambush. Cameras. Questions. We were swarmed and I felt like a damn caged lion trapped while the shots were fired.

Every time Alexa’s phone beeped she tapped the side to silence it. I could tell the calls made her anxious. I caught her scrolling through some sort of newsfeed, but I couldn’t read it while I drove.

I clicked the button on the truck to open the double gates when we reached the ranch. I heard Alexa sigh, but maybe it was a whimper. I shook my head.

“No one followed us,” I announced. I had watched the rearview mirror. The press had been on foot. No one bothered to tail us once I peeled out of the hospital’s garage.

She threw me a nervous smile. “That’s good.”

I made sure the gates locked securely behind us before we were inside the garage. Levels of security were exactly what we needed. Layers that kept Alexa safe.

I hopped from my side of the truck and walked around to the passenger side to help her down. It was a big step for her small frame.

“Thanks.”

“No problem.”

I didn’t know what to say. I wasn’t meant for these kind of situations. I didn’t offer comfort. I’d never been a shoulder for someone. Hell, I’d never bothered with it.

I led her inside and walked straight to the bar. If there was one thing I knew, it was what kind of whiskey helped when everything was stacked against you. I poured two rock glasses full and handed one to the shaky girl.

“Here. This will put it in perspective.” I shoved it into her hand.

“It’s the middle of the day.” Her eyes were misted.

“Trust me.”

I didn’t know shit about being a friend, but I was everyone’s drinking buddy. Getting drunk I could do. I tossed mine back and felt the welcome burn coat the inside of my throat.

Lexi sipped it while grimacing. She leaned forward to deposit the glass on the coffee table. There was still a shot’s worth she left behind.

“You need to finish that.” I nodded at her. “Go on.”

She took a solid breath and chugged. Her eyes fixated on the bottom of the tumbler.

“Good girl.” I took the empty glass from her. “How do you feel now?”

“Like I should have had some lunch first.”

Shit. I did everything backward.

“I’ve got food.” I shuffled to the kitchen to find something to feed her.

I scoured the pantry. I had chips, salsa, and more protein mix powder than could fill a vitamin store. Damn it. There were eggs in the fridge and a couple of steaks.

“How does an omelet sound?” I called from the kitchen.

Alexa appeared in the doorway. “It’s ok. You don’t have to go through so much trouble because of me.”

“Scrambled better?”

I ignored her. She needed to eat something. I’d light up the grill and toss the steaks on if that was the only way to get her to eat.

“Really, Luke. I’m fine. I-I—” She reached for the countertop as her boot slipped on the hardwood floor.

I reached over just in time to hook my hand around her waist before she tumbled to her ass. Fuck. She was more shaken than I realized.

“Gotcha.”

I couldn’t help the sudden instinct that kicked in. The one that said I needed to protect her. I’d catch her if she fell. I’d hold her until she was back on her feet.

Her palms flattened into my chest. The only thing keeping her from wiping out was my arm. It was like one of those damn trust exercises we did in camp sometimes. And right now Alexa was telling me I had her trust. I was a place she could fall.

I snaked another arm around her and saw her eyes light with expectation.

“You keep rescuing me today.”

No one had mistaken me for a white knight. “You were going to bust your ass,” I reminded her.

She shook her head. “Not just that.”

By now I probably should have stood her upright, but I held her firm and close to my body. My cock twitched. Everything was fucked up, but I couldn’t control how my body wanted her.

We both remained motionless when her phone started to ring. It was in her back pocket.

“Do you want to get that?” I asked. It hadn’t stopped since we left the hospital.

“I don’t think so. I know it’s Jake.”

“Hmm.” I looked into her eyes. Truth was I didn’t want her to pick up the phone either.

I didn’t want someone else in the middle of this. Whatever in the hell this was. And Jake. Well, he was a dick.

The phone rang again.

“He’s going to keep calling.” Alexa twisted her lips together.

“Want me to talk to him?”

“No. I can handle Jake.”

I made sure she was standing and had her balance before I let go. She turned away from me to answer.

“Hey, Jake.”

I heard how sweet and soft her voice was for him. I wondered if that act worked.

She ran her fingers through her long hair. “I know. I know. You don’t have to say it like that.” She paused. I guessed he gave her an earful. Bastard. She didn’t deserve that.

“Jake, if you’d just listen to me for a second…”

I clanged a few pots while I looked for the frying pan. I kept one ear in Alexa’s direction.

“It’s not that bad,” she insisted. “Really, my fans aren’t going to care.”

She groaned and twirled on the heels of her boots. “I don’t think it happened like that … uh-huh … I know. You’re paranoid. It’s going to be ok. My fans are more forgiving than you.” There was a long pause. “Fine. I’ll be there. But you’re wrong. I know you are.”

She hung up the phone.

I turned the dial, lighting the gas burner. “What did he say?”

She slouched onto one of the stools. “Oh just that I’ve completely ruined my career and that all of my fans are going to turn on me. I should expect my social media to be filled with hate messages.”

I pinched my brows together. “What the fuck?”

“We have already made internet news and it’s only the beginning.”

I couldn’t believe I was going to give advice. “Trust me. I’m an expert here. I’ve been through this shit. It will die down.”

“When?”

“Give it a day or two. Everyone will forget when some other celebrity changes the discussion. Pray some famous fucker gets arrested tonight.”

“That’s terrible.”

“That’s reality, baby.”

I couldn’t tell her how many times I had been saved because some other athlete got a DUI. I wanted to distract her. Get her to stop thinking about how we were caught and get back to focusing on that kiss instead. I had been ready to strip her and take her in the back of my truck. Her tongue drove me wild. Her sweet little moans made my dick hard. We needed to get on that topic.

“Luke, there’s something else.”

“What’s that?” I studied her lips. I wanted them. Badly.

“Jake wants to me ask you if you set it up.”

I moved about as fast as I did when a linebacker was headed for me. “He did what?”

There was a slow blink, but she didn’t back down. “Luke, did you tip off the press?”

“That’s what Jake is worried about?”

“I told him I didn’t think that’s what happened. There’s no way. Absolutely no way you’d involve the press. Because who would do that to someone else?”

It sounded as if she was trying to convince herself.

Her elbows dug into the counter. “You wouldn’t. I mean you hate the way the media follows you around. You’d never.”

I hadn’t moved yet. I held the spatula in my hand.

“But I think I would feel better if I heard you say it yourself.”

The pan sizzled behind me with a pop from the butter splatter. Fuck. Her blue eyes held me. I didn’t like tests. Being tested—being slammed into the middle of a moral crossroads. I was in too deep to turn around from this place. But here I was. In this place where I had to decide what I should do about lying to this pretty girl.

“Luke?”

12

Luke

This morning

Linc honked like he always did when he dropped by to pick me up. I locked the mudroom entry behind me and pressed the code for the alarm. I had a stupid grin on my face I needed to erase. Alexa was all I could think about.

“Damn it, Luke. Dress up for fuck’s sake.”

He eyed my jeans and T-shirt with annoyance when I emerged from the shadows of the garage.

It was early. I didn’t like mornings. I’d already worn a monkey suit in the past twenty-four hours. What did he expect?

“Shut up. It’s a PR guy, not the president.” I pulled open the truck door, slid into the seat, and fastened the seatbelt over my chest.

As usual my manager wore a dark suit. His hair was styled and I noticed a leather tote in the seat behind him on the floorboard. Linc was willing to suck up to people when I wasn’t. Our jobs were well-suited for each of us.

He put the truck in drive and we drove off the ranch toward Austin.

“What do you know about this Charlie fucker?” he asked.

“Not a damn thing.” The longhorns stood sleepily grazing grass in the fields.

“Helpful.” He smirked. “I don’t know what we’re walking into with this meeting.”

I tried to stretch my legs forward.

“I know what it is. Bullshit.” I pulled a pair of sunglasses over my eyes. I’d gotten minimal sleep and if anyone looked directly at me they’d be able to tell. Management forced me to go to that auction. My bloodshot eyes were on them.

“How was the charity deal? You never called me back.”

“Oh, that? Went well.”

Linc switched the station. “Seems like the children have a new benefactor. Read the press release the hospital sent out.”

“They mentioned my donations?” I scratched the back of my head. I wondered exactly how detailed the information had been. I hadn’t thought about it since Alexa showed up at my door. One taste of her and everything before was a distant memory.

“Hell, they said the Warriors’ quarterback was the night’s most generous donor. Didn’t know you had it in you.” He looked at me sideways, keeping one eye on the road.

“Coach wanted me to throw some money out there. So I did. That motherfucker is probably smiling over his cup of coffee this morning reading about it.”

“Uh-huh.” Linc’s lips twitched. “And I saw the Lexi Wilde pictures. How was the concert?”

I nodded. “Pretty good.”

“She’s hot as shit. Did you meet her? Did you get her number for me?”

I gave my brother a sharp cutting glare. “Since when do you like chick music?”

“Since the chick looks like that. What did you talk to her or something?”

“Yeah, when she rolled out of my bed this morning.” If Linc had any interest in Alexa, I needed to shut that shit down right now. She was mine.

“Bastard,” he muttered. “It’s like some kind of gift. No matter who the woman is she’s going to end up right where you want her.”

I grinned, thinking of all the places Alexa had been in my bed. Hot as shit didn’t begin to describe her perfect ass and tits.

“You gotta tell me how that happened.”

Yeah, I was the kind of guy who fucked and told, especially if there was competition. I was a territorial bastard.

“I saw her after the concert. We started talking. I gave her my number and she came over.” I shrugged my shoulders. “Simple as that.”

“Simple as that? She’s the damn sweetheart of country music. And you fucked her.” He groaned. “I should have gone with you.”

“Why? So you could have had a chance?”

I laughed so hard I snorted.

“It could happen.” Linc was pissed.

“I only need to say two words: Laney Peppercorn.”

“Shit. Not Laney again.” He turned into the Warrior corporate office drive.

“What? You hate that she chose the little brother over the big brother for prom. You can’t stand it,” I teased. I was feeling extra punchy this morning. It was the combination of sleep deprivation, incredible sex, and being pissed at management.

“You always bring up Laney fucking Peppercorn. You know she’s married now and has three kids, Luke.”

“Yeah. So?”

“So. She’s not part of this equation. Always with the Laney Peppercorn thing. Damn it.”

He threw the gear in park and stared ahead at the offices attached to the far end of the stadium. The concrete was stained with black streaks. I heard him mutter Laney’s name again. I liked to rile him up about her. Every once in a while I’d throw in she was the first girl I’d ever slept with, but that just rubbed salt in the wound. He’d been hung up on her for his entire senior year and never had the balls to ask her out.

That wasn’t me. I’d always had balls too big for my own good. Fuck. I got what I wanted because I went after it. In high school it was Laney Peppercorn. Last night it was Alexa Wilde. God, she was worth every second of missed sleep.

Linc reached for his briefcase. I guessed he thought it made him look more official—less like my brother, and more like the manager of the AFA’s highest-rated quarterback.

I eyed the corporate offices.

Somewhere in there, Charlie was waiting for us. Waiting to save my career with a life-altering public relations campaign. I wanted to punch something just thinking about it. He didn’t know me. He didn’t know how I lived my life. And I’d be willing to put a thousand grand on the table when we walked in, betting he didn’t know a fucking thing about football.

“Let’s get this over with,” I grumbled.

We both stepped from the truck and made our way to the McCade offices.

“Just let me do the talking,” Linc advised. “Don’t piss this guy off in the first five minutes.”

“This is fucking bullshit.” I tapped the elevator button.

“Yeah, but it’s the bullshit I handle, so keep your mouth shut. This is what you pay me to do.”

We stepped inside the elevator and counted the numbers to the top floor. I didn’t know if McCade thought he could actually impress someone in this shithole. Scheduling the meeting here was a statement. I got the message. This was a corporate issue. Not something for the locker room or the field. There weren’t enough touchdowns I could throw to get me out of the meeting. This was legal and human resources. This was the bastard’s only way to muscle me into anything.

The doors retracted and we walked down the hall to the conference room. The fluorescent lights buzzed overhead. The corridor had the same effect as walking down a school hallway.

“I didn’t get that girl pregnant,” I clenched my teeth. If all hell broke loose when we walked in that room, Linc needed to know why. McCade might think he could push me around, but I wasn’t taking the fall for something I didn’t do.

Fatherhood wasn’t going down on my list of sins.

Linc pressed my shoulder, locking his fingers into the joint with firmness. “I know you didn’t. I’m going to handle it.”

I shoved my hands in my pockets. “Let’s see what this fucker says.”

I walked in after Linc. As soon as I lifted my head I thought we had walked into the wrong meeting. Linc stopped short off the conference table. I realized what the problem was.

Ass.

It wiggled and backed up right in front of Linc. Wrapped in a tight black skirt, it was one hell of an ass. And it only got better when she lifted her head out from under the table.

“Sorry.” She wiped a tendril of dark hair from her face. “I dropped my pen.”

“No problem. Need help with anything else?” Linc offered.

She smiled. Her lips were painted in red. “I think I have everything else. Thanks.”

I ribbed my brother in the side with my elbow. We needed to get to our meeting.

“You wouldn’t happen to know where we could find Charlie Maine would you? We have a meeting.” Linc was all smiles.

She sat primly in one of the rolling chairs and inched it close to the table. “You’re in the right place. Have a seat.”

“Is he running late?” I heard the air of triumph in Linc’s voice. He liked having one-up on the guy. “We could both go for a cup of coffee while we wait for him.”

Her green eyes widened with something tinged with anger and shock. “You think I’m your coffee bitch?”

Linc was startled. “I wouldn’t call an office admin that.”

“I’m Charlie Maine,” she hissed.

Motherfucker.

I groaned. Damn it. She could add sexist chauvinists to her perception of us.

“Nice to meet you, Mr. Canton.” She extended her hand to me.

“Likewise. Sorry about my manager.” I glared at Linc.

“The other Mr. Canton?” she asked.

Linc knew how big his fuckup had been and we hadn’t even gotten through introductions yet.

“Nice to meet you, Mrs. Maine. I apologize for the mix-up there.”

“Miss Maine,” she corrected him.

He smiled, sliding into the seat across from her. I joined him, prepared for whatever she had aimed at me. It was likely ten times worse now that she had been insulted and reduced in status.

“Sorry again.” Linc was unraveled.

“We don’t have much time to get our action plan started. I like to work quickly.”

Linc cleared his throat. “I understand this meeting is required by ownership, but I want to say on behalf of Luke, before we go any further, that the accusations that were presented yesterday are completely false.”

She lifted her long eyelashes. “I don’t care whether they are true or not. The only thing that matters is whether we can keep the rumor from leaking. Because at this point, the public is going to believe anything she says.”

I opened my mouth to speak, but Linc cut me off.

“That’s ridiculous. It’s a lie. Making Luke jump through hoops like this when he should be in the weight room or on the field is a waste of a million-dollar arm. This is bad business all around. I thought I could count on Mr. McCade to at least make a sound business decision.”

I could tell that irritated her. She pressed her lips together in a straight line. She was pretty in that business kind of way. She had an incredible body combined with dark hair and striking green eyes. If she wasn’t wearing a suit and lodged behind a laptop she might be a different girl altogether. But that wasn’t the reality. She wasn’t dressed in tight jeans, waiting for some guy to buy her a drink in a bar. No, Miss Maine was sitting in the McCade conference room and held every ounce of power the old man had given her. She was ready to bust my balls for every mistake I’d made up until to this very moment.

“I’ve been hired to clean up your image. And that’s what I’m going to do.”

I leaned back in my chair, folding my arms together. My image? It was a fucking joke. It was beyond salvation. Everyone knew who Luke Canton really was. I didn’t pretend. I didn’t hide behind press statements.

Her nails clicked on the keyboard and she twirled her screen around to face us.

“Let’s talk about this.” She pointed at a headline from the hospital gala. It must have been the same one Linc read this morning.

“What about it?” I asked.

“We need more of this. All the time. You did an excellent job last night. Perfect.”

“It wasn’t my idea,” I grumbled.

Her eyebrows rose. “It doesn’t have to be. I’ll take care of those things, but from here on out everything you do is scripted. The events. The donations. Signing autographs for kids after the games. Who you hang out with. Everything.”

I felt the vise clamping down on me. I wasn’t the team pet. And I sure as hell wasn’t going to let this girl tell me who I could see. Linc needed to get her pretty white teeth off my ass.

“So you’re going to tell him he can’t continue to see Lexi Wilde?” Linc threw, what he thought was a touchdown, in her face.

Linc’s question had the same effect as a bomb going off in the room. Charlie was stunned, and I had to wait for the smoke to clear to decide if I was going to punch my brother.

“Lexi Wilde?” Charlie’s eyes lit. “The Lexi Wilde? You two are actually together?”

“No. It’s nothing.” I shook off the insinuation. “Linc is screwing around.”

“Now, that is interesting.” She typed into the laptop again and whispered whatever was on the screen. I was busy threatening my fucking brother with my eyes.

“Yes. Yes. She’s in town the rest of today. She posted something on her Instagram this morning. Perfect.” Charlie’s attention turned to me. “I was going to present a list of suitable Austin bachelorettes, but this works even better. We need a woman to clean up your image. I have to say I’m impressed.”

“Hold on. I only met Alexa last night. I don’t want to drag her into this. It has nothing to do with her. What does she have to do with football?”

“Doesn’t matter.” Charlie didn’t give a shit. She operated like a guy that way. “She is your ticket to redemption.”

“That’s not a ticket I’m buying.” My jaw clenched.

Alexa had her own problems. I knew that without knowing the details on what they were. She didn’t show up on my doorstep last night because she had everything she wanted. She showed up because I could give her something she was missing.

“I want you to meet her at the hospital. Take her flowers. Do something sweet. I can help you with that part. Oh, and visit the kids. Try to make it a joint appearance. Completely unplanned and authentic looking.

“And I don’t care how or when, but I want the press to see you kiss her. Plain as day. Nothing blurry—not one of those interpretive pictures. I need a full-on lip-lock that is going to meltdown the internet. I want everyone talking about you two.”

Charlie’s cheeks flushed and her emerald eyes glowed. She was getting off on this. I’d seen the same look in the coaches’ eyes when they came up with a game-winning play. Or on the sideline when I ran a reverse route no one saw coming.

“You have got to be fucking with me,” I growled.

She flattened her palms on the table. “I never fuck around, Luke. Never.”

13

Alexa

I blinked again. “Luke?”

Jake had hissed at me like a snake on the phone, insisting the Warriors had set up the entire hospital ambush. For a brief second I pictured him with a forked tongue. I wanted Luke to tell me Jake was a paranoid ass as usual. There was no way that he would have set me up like that.

And that kiss. I had felt it down to my toes. He wanted me. We couldn’t keep our hands off each other. And for a few hours I thought he was the sweetest, hottest guy on the planet to entertain the kids. He was in it. I saw him. He joked with them. Tossed the ball and signed autographs. He was some kind of an unreal mix of bad-boy-sweet-sexy-dish that I wanted more of.

“Alexa.” He turned toward the stove, dialing the burner to a low number. I didn’t care about food right now. I cared about an answer.

The whiskey burned in my empty stomach.

Every second that ticked by with Luke’s silence, I had a sinking feeling I knew what the answer was. Damn it. If Jake was right about this, I’d never live it down. Add it to one more of the mistakes he threw in my face on a regular basis. The silence grew to an uncomfortable level.

“I-I can’t believe you aren’t denying it.” I waited. “What would make you do something like this? You have plenty of press. You have paparazzi. Why would you want us to be caught kissing? Why?”

I saw a hint of regret in his eyes. He didn’t deny it. I had accused him and he never fought back. Luke didn’t seem like the kind of man to take wild accusations lightly. All the more reason I was suspicious.

“Luke!”

“Fuck.” He whipped around. “I didn’t have anything to do with it. Ok?”

“Except you had everything to do with it. You knew it was going to happen. You were there. It is not ok. My manager is having a heart attack trying to do damage control.”

“It was supposed to be good for my image,” he tried to explain.

“What? How?” And then I realized what he was saying. How the pieces clicked into place.

I was what made the image complete. A kiss with me somehow righted the balance of his bad boy reputation. For the same reason he pulled me down, I lifted him up. He used me. And he got what he wanted.

I had to get out of here. I looked for my bag, frantic to get out of Luke’s house. I’d call a cab. I’d call Jake if I had to. I wasn’t going to spend another minute under the roof of a man who would trade me in for his own benefit. Dragging and kicking me into the mud. Using my name with ease as if I were his property to dictate. I had enough of that with Jake.

“Alexa, wait.”

Luke followed me to the next room.

“I’m an idiot. A naïve, stupid, girl,” I huffed. “The country sweetheart who got fucked by the bad boy. Got it. I won’t make the mistake again.”

There it was. I spotted the bag where I had dropped it on the leather couch.

“You’re not stupid. It was a dick move.”

I laughed. “Dick? That’s it. Dick move?”

“I’m sorry. Ok? I shouldn’t have let it get that far.”

“Which part?” I steamed. “What part exactly went too far, Luke? The part where you led me to believe you gave a shit about sick kids? The part when I agreed to come back here with you today? The part when I let myself think we had some kind of connection after I spent the night with you?” I stood with my hands on my hips. My cheeks were hot and my hands started to shake. “I’d love to hear it. Which part exactly should you have reined in?”

I don’t know why I felt as betrayed as I did. It wasn’t as if I was in some kind of serious relationship with the quarterback. We had one night together. One amazing, change-my-life kind of night, but nonetheless—only one night. I was overacting to the level of deception. Too late to dial that down now. I was in full-blown Alexa mode.

“The press. That part.” He moved in front of me to grab my shoulders. I almost stumbled into him with the impact. “And I do care about sick kids,” he added. “And you.”

I glared at him. Nothing he could say at this point was going to soften me. I was angry and there was a violation of my trust he couldn’t heal with sexy bedroom eyes and sweet apologies.

“Well, you suck.”

I threw the bag over my shoulder, shaking his heavy hands from my body. I wanted out from under this.

“Don’t you want to hear what happened?” he asked.

I was three steps out of the living room, but I slowed down before I made it to the garage.

“Does it matter?”

“It does to me. Come back and sit down, Alexa.”

It was the way he said my name. The gravel in his voice. The forlorn look in his eyes. Shit. My phone buzzed again and I hesitated to answer Jake’s next call.

“Don’t answer it,” he instructed.

My eyes darted to Luke. I didn’t have to listen to him. I didn’t have to do anything he told me to do. But I thought about last night. How I gave myself to him. How when I let myself be free in his arms I’d never felt more alive in my life. Listening to Luke Canton last night had been the best decision I’d made in years.

He unlocked something in me I couldn’t get anyone else to see. No one wanted to see it. But Luke did. And only an hour ago I had been ready to go right back to that place. To his bed. To do all the dirty and naughty things we could under his sheets before I had to get on a plane to Nashville. I’d only had a few short hours with the man who had made every part of my body vibrate with ecstasy. It wasn’t enough.

And before now I wasn’t worried about his reputation. I didn’t care about what people thought about Luke. All I cared about was what he could do for me. How he could make me feel. I was here to drain every last drop of pleasure from him before I flew out of town. Because what I wanted was the bad boy. I wanted a rule breaker. Someone to push me.

Did that make me any better than Luke? Or were we the same? Both needing something from the other? Using each other? It was personal gain in different forms. Shit.

My boots clacked along the hardwoods. I stopped in front of the couch.

“Ok, I’m listening. You have two minutes,” I threatened.

“I didn’t think you would turn around.”

“I didn’t think I would either.” My eyes narrowed.

What was the feeling running through my body? Defeat? Anger? Anticipation? I closed my eyes. Luke had set me on edge and we were completely clothed. There was an electric source that trickled from his body. No matter what I did I was drawn to it. Angry or not.

“Sit.” He patted the leather seat and I did as he commanded.

I felt tiny, dwarfed by the huge pieces of furniture and Luke’s big frame. He was tall even when he was sitting.

“I’m sorry about the press attack.” His hand landed on my knee. “It wasn’t my idea, but I went along with it.”

“Why?”

“Because I wanted to spend time with you.” His hand inched farther up my leg, and I couldn’t help the fire that spread between my thighs.

“You could have done that without the cameras.”

“And I was going to. We had that planned before the paparazzi showed up. After you left this morning, I had a meeting with my new PR consultant. Charlie says I have to rebuild my image. I think our meeting at the gala last night was the inspiration for the whole thing. You could help change the public’s perception of me.”

“But it’s only perception, right? You aren’t actually interested in becoming a different person.” I didn’t know how I could sound so hostile, while at the same time my body was firing with want for him. His fingers dug into my skin.

“I never said I wanted to be a new man.” His voice deepened. “I play football. I want to play football. This is the condition I’ve been given if I want to stay a Warrior.”

I gasped when he shoved my other leg to the side and began to stroke the inner fabric. But I didn’t stop him. I sat listening, talking, and soaking in every stroke.

“And using me seemed like an acceptable price.” I ignored that in this moment I was using him. Draining every sexual thrill I could from his hands. My body syphoned every shred of lust rolling off of him.

“I was going to see you anyway, Alexa. The press was called in by PR. And they could have followed us if they wanted to. It might have happened anyway. I was going to kiss you like that no matter who was watching. I couldn’t keep my hands off you.”

“But you led them down there. They knew exactly where we were going to be.”

“Fuck, Alexa. I’m sorry. I had to do it.”

My breath hitched when his fingers crawled to the center of my legs and tugged at the zipper on my jeans. He was crazier than I thought if he had any expectation of sex right now, because I was absolutely not going to … Oh shit.

His hand dove between the lace on my panties and the denim of my jeans. I wiggled, giving him more room to explore.

“Had to?” I gasped the words.

“Yes. Had to. You have to get it. Football is my life. I can’t do anything else. I am the Warriors QB. You have music. I have football.”

His fingers strummed over my clit and my eyes rolled back as my lashes fluttered closed. I tried to force down the sudden fire burning in my core.

“I fucking hate to admit it.” He gnashed his teeth. “I have to do what they want until I’m off probation with management. Good guy image all the way for now.”

It was hard to think while he made my body want everything physical and erotic. He held me in a haze so that I only cared about raging screams and toe-curling orgasms that were gifted by his one-of-a-kind cock. I realized how alike we were. I had the image he needed. And he had the attitude I wanted. He had lived free and wild. He didn’t care what people thought. I wanted that so badly.

I tried to breathe slowly, letting his fingers work my clit with perfect precision while my last remnants of sanity held on.

“I get it,” I whispered. “I get it, Luke.” I sighed this time with a mixture of understanding and desire. I did understand him.

“Good,” he whispered. “I want you to get it. I want you to get everything I can give you right now, baby.”

I was falling. Falling into his hands. Forgetting that I tried to walk out. Forgetting that two minutes ago I was livid and ready to punch him. All my body knew was that Luke Canton delivered on his promises.

“I think we should fuck until you feel better about everything,” he growled in my ear, pushing a thick finger inside me.

I nodded my head vigorously. Exactly. That’s exactly what we needed to do.

Somehow I had lifted my hips and my jeans were in a pile on the floor. Luke’s eyes were hungry.

“I know how to make you feel better.”

I wasn’t prepared when he spun me around, laying me over the back of the couch so my ass was in the air. His hand squeezed and massaged while the other peeled the lace to my knees. I was at his complete mercy. I obeyed as he quickly removed the tank top over my arms and head. He unsnapped my bra and I raised my hands to free my chest.

The leather felt cool and soft against my skin. I rubbed my breasts up and down and my nipples perked under the friction. My body responded to Luke’s commands as if I knew they were coming. As if I were desperately waiting for him to give me the next direction.

He pumped two wide fingers inside me and I whimpered. “Oh, God.”

I rode him like that, letting him pry my entrance while I bounced and coated his fingers with fresh juices.

“Fuck, Alexa.” He pulled the back of my hair, biting my ear with a quick snap of his teeth. His fingers slammed inside me and I moaned with pleasure.

“Feels good,” I whispered.

“Does it?” His voice in my ear sent shivers straight to my core.

“Yes.”

“Watching you fuck my fingers like this is hot.” He kissed my neck and my shoulder. I felt the hot rigid point of his tongue descend along my spine.

And then I bucked when I felt it curve over my ass. I froze. But Luke was quick. And within a heartbeat he was planted on the floor, his hands pushing upward between my legs and his mouth clamped tight over my clit.

“Oh, God.” My head hung back as he sucked and licked. I rode his face as shamelessly as I did his fingers.

His teeth grazed my clit and I clawed at the couch for stability. My knees wobbled and my breath was ragged. Holy hell I was going to come in Luke’s living room, all over his face.

He growled with satisfaction as my hips jutted harder. I needed it. I couldn’t stop now even if I wanted to save the last bit of dignity I had. I rode and rocked. His tongue plunged inside my entrance, twisting and swirling.

“Oh shit, Luke. Oh God.”

“Come for me, baby. Come hard.”

The light shone through the wooden blinds. The only sound was me gasping for air as Luke coaxed the deep orgasm from my core with his tongue.

My nipples rubbed over the leather and I lost it. The orgasm cascaded from inside me, spilling through my limbs and pouring from my voice like a song.

Luke sucked and stroked until I panted for relief. “Please,” I begged.

I didn’t think I would survive another explosive orgasm. But he was relentless chasing his fingers with this tongue in and out of my entrance. The second one tore through me more viciously than the first.

“Don’t fight it, feel it, or I’ll make you come all over again.”

I groaned, knowing he’d never stop until I came the way he wanted. I gave in. I closed my eyes, lifting my hair from my neck. Jerking my hips. Sighing. Moaning. Saying Luke’s name over and over. Like a runaway rip current it made me relinquish all control. It pulled and tugged at me until my entire body was drenched in sweat and bliss.

He chuckled, lowering my ass to the couch. I turned to face him. My hair fell in my eyes. But Luke stood, scooping me in his arms.

“Feeling better?”

“Oh God, yes.” I smiled. I’d never let sex wrap me in such sinful rapture before. He made me a fucking goddess.

“Good. Because I’ve got more therapy planned for you.”

He kicked through the bedroom door.

“Therapy?”

Just the fact that Luke had plans for me made me feel a new twinge in my core. I liked round one. Round one was epic. Round one made me a new woman.

“This is my version of fuck-the-brand therapy.”

I looked at him quizzically.

“You know. The brands that define us. The ones that caused this bullshit fight between us.”

I nodded. “I do know.”

“So, let’s do what we want to do. No brands. No labels. No managers. Just you and me fucking each other until tomorrow.”

I swallowed hard. Oh God.

“But I have to get on a plane,” I argued. “I told Jake I’d be there.” Jake would kill me if I missed that flight to Nashville. He was standing in the middle of a media firestorm. A hellish blazing tornado that revolved around my bad decisions.

Luke tossed me on the center of the bed and shed his clothes. He crawled toward me. Naked. His cock wide and throbbing for me. His body rigid and athletic. Beautiful in a masculine way that made me want to touch every square inch of muscle until I had him completely memorized.

“There are no brands allowed in this bed, baby. Do you want to get on a plane, Alexa or do you want me to fuck you?”

14

Luke

I loved that sated glow on her body. I knew I had satisfied her on the couch. I’d never seen a woman come like that. It was fucking art the way she did it. She wasn’t going to suddenly roll over and bolt out of here. Not with the sounds she made. Not with the way her body reacted to my every move. I held some kind of power over Alexa and we both knew it.

“If I stay, it’s going to make things worse,” she argued.

“And if you go, we don’t get to do this.” I waggled my eyebrows.

“If I’m seen in Austin another day, the press is going to report we’re together. It’s more than a kiss if I stay. It’s a headline.”

“So let them.” I leaned down, flicking my tongue over her nipple. It puckered into a hard peak, begging for my teeth to toy with it some more. Fuck, she drove me crazy. I wondered how many different ways I could make her come. Was there anything she wouldn’t do?

“And this? What is it if I stay? Do you want another headline with me? Is this more press for you?”

I looked in her eyes.

“This is what you want it to be.”

I couldn’t resist her tit any longer. My teeth latched on it, sucking with possessiveness.

“God, Luke,” she groaned. Her hands urged my head closer before trying to shove me off. “Is this part of the plan? Part of the great PR campaign for redemption?” she asked through panted breaths. “You need my good girl name?”

The planning meeting never got past the hospital ambush. That was all Charlie had outlined for me. She wanted Austin to start to make the connection that underneath the playboy act it was possible I had a heart of gold, buried under the scowl and the tattoos. Life had made me tough, and all it took was the influence of a good woman to make me some kind of loveable teddy bear. It was fucking laughable. I didn’t have a hard life. I was born and raised in a small Texas town. Great parents who raised two football-loving sons. One a people pleaser. The other a hard-headed prick.

Alexa writhed under my touch. “You have everything to gain and I have everything to lose.”

She was fucking right. This girl could save me. And I could destroy her.

Getting lost in her. Burying myself in her was the first time I thought salvation was something I wanted. Her eyes on me stoked a new desire. A desire for something bigger than myself.

I didn’t want to be the Luke Canton that everyone else saw me as. I wanted to be the Luke Canton that Alexa saw me as. The man she relied on to protect her when we were in the parking garage. The quarterback who would pay his last penny for a private concert with her. The man she needed to unlock the secrets of her body. She fucking needed me.

“Then don’t tell anyone.” I didn’t need her because Charlie dictated it. I needed her for me. She was my perfect dirty secret.

“What?” She tried to prop herself on her elbows, but I was making my way down the silky skin surrounding her navel. She flattened on the mattress with a soft sigh.

“I don’t care about using your image. That was never my shitty idea. It won’t happen again.”

I took my time, pressing her folds back with my fingers, feasting my eyes on her swollen clit. It was as if it were pulsing a rhythm for me. I licked my lips.

With a quick snatch, Alexa pulled a pillow to her chest. That wasn’t going to help her when I got started.

“Really?” She barely got the word out. “You won’t?”

“No. I swear.” I wanted the argument to be over. I wouldn’t touch her name. Only her body.

I blew a warm whisper of air between her legs, pinning her velvet layers into position. God, she was even waxed to perfection, pointing me to right where I wanted to be.

“You haven’t answered my question,” I reminded her.

Her eyes were glazed with lust. I could smell the musky scent seeping between her legs. My cock was a hard rod of steel, ready to possess her one more time. But not until she said the words.

The stakes were different now.

I had an entirely different offer than I did last night.

“Do you want me to let you go, or do you want to stay and be fucked?” I’d never given a woman the option to be mine. I’d never wanted anything more than a good-time fuck. But with Alexa one time. Two times. Not enough. Not fucking close.

Her nails dug into the contours of her side. She twisted her hips, pumping with sexy hip action, trying to get more from me, but I held her where I wanted her. I watched the pink bud throb—God, she fucking wanted me.

With one word that swollen clit would be mine. I’d bury my cock so far inside her there would be no going back. Her slick honey coated her. My dick would slide with fiery heat, claiming her with authority.

Her manicured nails raked closer to me, digging into her thighs. The tips pressed at the peak of her knees and I almost fucking lost it. She spread her legs wider almost dropping them to the blanket as if she could read my mind.

“Fucked,” she moaned. “I want to be fucked.”

Her tits pebbled and the cream between her legs flowed.

I needed only one taste. One second inside her like this. Taking in every ounce of sinful heaven she offered.

I thumbed the end of my cock swirling the precum over the head before I reared back and sank into her with power that branched from every part of my body.

Just a few pumps like this I told myself. Only a minute with nothing between us. She was mine. Alexa Wilde was mine to fuck and she stayed in my bed because this was exactly what she wanted.

15

Alexa

My hands instantly clutched the taut muscles of Luke’s backside when he thrust his thick dick between my legs. Relief. Pain. Ecstasy. I sighed.

I was sore from last night, but with a few thrusts I stretched around him and the burn turned to an undeniable sensation that tingled all the way to my toes.

He pushed forward on his palms, his massive body hovered over me, sending his steel to hit my inner walls with blinding electric shocks.

“Ohh,” I cried, loving it. Wanting it again and again.

He pulled out, nuzzling the head of his cock over my clit before driving back inside me with slow grinding pressure. The searing heat was unbelievable. The connection. The friction. The fever between our bodies.

“Fuck, Alexa,” he groaned. “I don’t want to stop fucking this way.” The raw flesh of our bodies craved each other.

And then I realized how reckless we were being.

“C-condom,” I sputtered, trying to focus on what was in the nightstand.

The idea of Luke pulling out of me and sheathing his superior cock with a layer between us made me want to cry in disagreement. I liked sex just like this. Skin on skin. I take that back. I liked sex with Luke like this.

“You feel too damn good.” He bit my shoulder, hilting himself so far I gulped for air.

I whimpered. He was right. Again. I needed it again.

“I feel it every time you squeeze my cock. God, Alexa,” he groaned. “I feel how hot and wet you are. How fucking tight your sweet pussy is.” He closed his eyes, driving into me.

I arched welcoming the intensity. Needing it. Craving it.

“But shouldn’t we…” The bedside drawer wasn’t out of reach, but if he separated his body from mine it would feel like he had to walk a mile to come back.

“Not today, but soon.” He did the one thing neither one of us wanted, and pulled out from me. I almost groaned from the hollowness he left. “I want to come inside you just like this, damn it. I’m going to fill you with my come. I swear.”

I nodded. Was it crazy I wanted it too? I was terrible at staying on any kind of birth control regimen when I was on the road. But that was going to change. I wanted more sex with Luke like this.

And somehow we had made a pact. A decision. I didn’t know what to call it. A secret affair? Sex on the side? On his bed, in the middle of the day I agreed to keep seeing him for this. I’d find a way to stay on the pill. Timers on my phone. Helena’s help. Whatever it took.

“Get on your knees, baby.”

My eyes gave away my hesitation.

“Now,” he growled.

My heart beat faster and a new jolt of adrenaline raced through my veins. I rolled onto my stomach, pushing up with my hands so that I was on all fours.

Luke nestled behind me, gripping my hips with his million-dollar hands.

Instead of thrusting inside me, I cried out with white-hot pleasure when he lifted me and rocked my hips backward, slamming me onto his cock.

“Oh fuck, your pussy is soaking wet.”

I jolted upright again on my knees, landing a second time on his wide shaft. The pleasure split through me.

“Fuck, Alexa.” He swept the hair from my neck, gaining access to my skin. His lips sucked and bit while I rode his hard dick with relentless pursuit.

His hands twisted and plucked at my nipples. I whimpered, but we kept up the punishing pace. My hands lifted in the air and wrapped to the back of his neck, clutching him for balance.

I knew all I needed was one touch and the epic orgasm that had been building would be free.

I’d be free.

I bounced slower, gyrating my hips, looking for the friction my clit needed for release. I moaned with the unbearable need building inside me.

“Please, Luke,” I begged. “I want to come.” I didn’t know I had this ability. To open my body to so many climaxes.

My back pressed against his chest. The sweat from our bodies gliding between us. My tits jutted forward, aching from the attention his greedy fingers gave them. And my swollen clit hummed and throbbed. It pulsed with demand.

“Touch yourself,” he commanded, his voice deep and gruff in my ear.

It wasn’t as if I’d never done that before. But never in front of someone.

I drifted one hand from his neck and settled it between my heated folds. Holy shit I was wet. I moaned when my fingertips brushed against the swollen nub.

“Fuck me baby while you show me how you make yourself come,” he ordered.

I inhaled for air before my fingers deftly strummed over the tight bud that had me in intoxicating pain. I was mindless with lust and greed for his body. I wanted to show him I could be a fucking hellcat.

My breasts bobbed wildly. My thighs tightened. I arched my back into the planes of Luke’s chest. He nipped my ear between his teeth, coaxing me to come harder and faster.

“Fuck me,” he growled. “Show me how you like to touch that sweet pussy of yours.”

“Ohh, Luke.” I threw my head back, knowing I was lost. Lost to his commands. Lost to the pleasure he gave me. Lost to the new addiction I had found.

I couldn’t hold on to a single thread of gravity. The most epic orgasm of my life had started unraveling in my body. It was intense and mind-blowing. I loved sex with him. It was everything sex was supposed to be.

Luke roared over my shoulder as he picked me up and slammed me again on his length. I screamed his name, knowing he had peaked too. The warmth of my arousal slid down my thigh. Our heavy breathing slowed. I leaned into his chest—this time with a quiet connection.

His chest heaved with a giant breath and we worked to untangle our knees so we could lie down. I flopped onto the pillow with a silly grin on my face. There was no doubt what we had just done was worth a missed flight home.

“Fuck.”

I heard the alarm in Luke’s voice.

I sat upright. “What’s wrong?”

The look on his face scared the shit out of me.

“The condom broke.”

16

Luke

I looked at the shredded rubber still attached to my dick. The end had blown off. No fucking way. I hopped from the bed and walked to the bathroom. I closed the door. I needed a damn minute to think alone. I flushed the remnants and started the shower.

My first instinct was to sue the fucking condom manufacturer. I always bought the same magnum, extra ribbed, extra thin. Those babies were my fucking go-to.

My second instinct to ask Alexa about her birth control. A girl like that had to be on the pill.

I heard a tap on the door.

“Luke?”

“Yeah, getting in the shower.” I ran both my hands over my head. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

“Ok, can I join you?” Her sweet voice was muffled through the door.

I turned the latch. She stood in front of me, holding the sheet to her chest. Her blue eyes cut to my soul. I grabbed a towel from the linen closet and threaded it through the rack for her.

Without a word she walked inside the double shower while I held the door open for her. The floor was made from river rocks I’d had brought in from the Hill Country. It was a reminder of home. When things were easier. When I could float down the river in a tube with a cold beer and a bunch of friends.

“Even your shower is gorgeous.” She looked around at the tile.

“Err, thanks.”

The sex was fucking out of this world. So intense. So powerful. I’d wanted to fuck her so badly I’d blown through the damn condom. I shouldn’t have been so surprised. We were rough and hungry for each other. I’d never fucked another woman with such fervent passion. Never.

For the first time in my life I’d agreed to have a relationship—some kind of relationship. And now I was standing in the shower looking into the ocean blue eyes of a girl I might have knocked up.

“Do you want to talk about it?” she asked. “The condom thing?”

I could be a complete dick and act like everything was fine when we both knew it wasn’t, or I could act like a man and hit this head on.

I shrugged. “You’re on the pill, right? I’m not too worried.” Deflection and lies—my real go-to.

She bit her lip as the rainfall droplets fell from the showerhead, splashing our shoulders.

“Sort of. Not regularly.” She didn’t look as freaked out as I felt.

“Shit.”

“You’re right though. It’s probably fine. The chances are so small and I doubt I’m even in that window. I’ll take one as soon as we get out of the shower.”

“But when did you take the last one?” I sounded like her damn doctor.

I didn’t know shit about women’s bodies other than how to make them come harder and more times than they ever had.

She twisted those pretty suckable lips together.

“Four days? Maybe five?”

“Hell.”

Her fingertips pressed into my forearm. For a second it steadied me. “It was one time, Luke. We’re fine.”

“Yeah.” I let the ice-cold death grip that had seized my lungs go. “Yeah, we’re fine.”

Alexa acted like everything was ok. She shampooed her hair and lathered up with soap. If she wasn’t freaking out, neither was I. There was no way she was pregnant. No way she had my baby inside her.

Instead of turning me off the thought made my cock rigid. I looked down to see my erection grow between us. It was the last thing I wanted—the last thing I needed. A baby. But the idea that I had fucked her so deeply was the hottest shit I’d ever thought about. I gazed at her flat belly.

“Do you think we could order some real food?” she asked. “I’m starving and maybe still a little buzzed from the bourbon, or maybe it was the sex.” She smiled playfully.

“We could go out,” I suggested.

She eyed me. “I don’t want to sound like a bitch, but I was serious earlier. I can’t be seen with you Luke. I want to stay.” Her eyes dropped innocently. “I want to be here with you, but I don’t know if my brand can survive you.”

I chuckled. It was as if she had called me a vampire or even something more toxic like a werewolf. My bite wasn’t that bad.

I gripped her chin and tilted her lips toward me. “I get it, baby.”

I kissed her, sucking the air from her, while she ground her hip against my thigh. I didn’t need the fucking drama either. Charlie was going to have to come up with another way to build my new choir boy image.

“Really?” Her eyes darted back and forth.

“Damn.” My hands slid over her slick wet curves. “Just how long did you want to extend your stay in Austin?” I cupped her ass like I owned it. After the past twenty-four hours, I was damn sure I did. I owned every inch of this woman’s body.

17

Alexa

We sat in front of Luke’s fireplace on the floor. There were more boxes of Chinese food than I’d ever seen. He had ordered everything on the menu. He wasn’t shy about eating. I knew athletes had voracious appetites and he showed me just how true that was. It was the opposite for me. I had to watch every calorie. Every carb.

I stuck my chopsticks into the box of sticky rice at the same time he reached for some.

“Hey.” I batted him away, giggling. He jabbed back at me.

The food was good. My stomach had finally stopped growling. I thought Luke felt bad about starving me for so long, but he made up for it with amazing sex. It was a better staple around her than having cereal or bread on hand.

When the delivery driver dropped off the order, I made sure to stay out of sight. I felt like an outlaw, hiding behind the blinds. Ignoring Jake’s calls. Disappearing while I sorted everything out with Luke.

His oversized Warriors T-shirt draped off my shoulder. I had washed and dried the only underwear I had and sat with him with nothing else on.

He pressed the remote to change the music station. He liked the acoustic stuff.

“If you could only pick one, who would you say your favorite country singer is?” I asked.

He popped the rest of a spring roll between his lips.

“Hmm. That’s fucking hard to answer. You can’t put limits out there like that.”

“Only one.” I eyed him. I liked games like this.

“Well, we both know you’re out.” He winked. “Unless you open the category up to which country singer I want in my bed.”

“I’m not on the list of choices. Come on, tell me.” I scooped more rice onto my plate. “You obviously love this music. You have to have a favorite. Who is it?”

Luke set his plate on the hearth and extended his muscular legs until he was standing. I watched him stroll to the other side of the room, stoop, and open the door to a wooden cabinet.

He held up a twelve by twelve cardboard sleeve.

“Is that vinyl?” I rose from the floor and walked toward him.

“I bought this when I was sixteen in one of those rusted out barns that ran as an antique store.”

I took the album with the tattered corners and flipped it over. “Robert Earl Keen is your favorite?”

“Hell, yeah.” The cover was tattered and worn. I wondered how many times Luke had listened to it.

My music was about as far from this as it could be. My concerts were filled with electronic graphics on huge hi-definition screens, pyrotechnics, and more dancers than I could remember their names. I put on a full-fledged show. The kind that sold out in mega stadiums.

There were lights that twinkled and dazzled and my band was so loud the ear plugs I wore barely helped. Comparing my music to this was like saying Johnny Cash and Beyoncé sang the same thing.

“Want to hear it?” Luke seemed excited. He let the album fall to the center of his palm. Tucked on the bottom shelf of his stereo system was a turntable. It was wired into his sound system.

“Yes. I’d love to.”

I waited while the first few seconds crackled and popped. And then there was a gravelly richness of music in the air around us. Luke walked back to our Chinese picnic and I followed.

“Yeah, I could listen to this album every day.”

“It’s great. He’s great.” I’d never met the Texas singer, but I strained my ears to hear him. What drew Luke to his music.

It was stripped down and raw. There weren’t a hundred different instruments competing to be heard. The producer didn’t jam it with effects. It was pure music.

I blinked. “I guess I don’t get it.”

“What?”

“If you like this why did you stay for my show?”

“Because you’re damn gorgeous, Alexa. And I know you winked at me.” He smiled.

“I’m being serious. Tell me—if I wanted Luke Canton as a fan—what would you tell me to do? How do I reach you with my music?”

Because that’s what I wanted. I wanted to pull a man like Luke into my heart. And the music in my lyrics was the writing on my soul.

He rubbed the side of my calf. “I am a fan. A very big one.” Luke stretched his back. “I think I paid high-dollar for a private concert. You could sing for me now.”

“You’re not serious.”

“Do you know how much that check was I wrote?” he asked.

“It was for charity. For the kids,” I pressed. “You don’t really want me to sing for you after hearing that album. Not if you like this kind of music.”

He tilted his head. “I like lots of things. And I’ve decided I can never get enough of Alexa Wilde. Your voice is gorgeous—like the rest of you. Sing, baby.” His voice was determined.

It made me blush. Shameless flirting worked. And the funny thing was he didn’t need to do it. He already had me. We had crossed every personal boundary two people could cross. We had given each other our souls. We had made a co-conspirator pact. And I was trying to pretend that there wasn’t a chance we had possibly made a baby.

My stomach rolled when I thought about it. I couldn’t think about it. No baby. No baby. I had taken the next pill in my packet after we showered, but I realized then how terrible my math really was. It was closer to seven days since I had last taken a pill.

“My guitar is still in your truck,” I offered. “I could do the concert now.”

I had to stop thinking about the possibility of a baby. Music was where I could get lost. It was always my refuge.

I realized I might have the perfect audience for my new material. Luke didn’t want to hear the pop-country crap my fans loved. I could sing the lyrics that spilled through the pages in my journals. He had seen me completely raw and vulnerable. This felt right. Completely right.

“Going to get it now.” He waggled his eyebrows and hopped up with the dexterity of a well-trained athlete.

I cleaned up the white paper boxes and stored the leftovers in the refrigerator. I refilled my wine glass and walked back to the living room.

Luke appeared holding my guitar case. He handed it to me. He quickly turned off Keen and sat on the ottoman closest to the hearth. He was only feet away. I took my time unlatching the case and tuning the instrument.

It was strange. This morning we had sung together at the hospital. I hadn’t felt self-conscious. I was used to audiences. This felt completely different as if I were sharing something even more intimate.

“What are you going to play?” he asked.

“Something new. I want you to tell me your honest opinion.”

“I’m not very good at constructive criticism,” he explained. “I’m a terrible bullshitter.”

“Good.” I smiled. “Tell me if you hate it. I need to know.”

“I’m not gonna—”

“Shh. Listen,” I ordered.

I bowed my head over the guitar and started the song. The notes flowed. The words poured from my throat. The music filled the room.

It was Luke, my guitar, and me. I had never sung like this before. I had never sung to someone—to a man. To a man I was inexplicable bonded to like none other. Every word. Every note. Roped us closer together. The lasso was so tightly wound my heart beat hard against the restraints, but I couldn’t stop. I had to tell him how I felt. How my life wasn’t mine alone anymore. I sang. I spilled my depths and layers. I didn’t stop until Luke knew my life was forever different because I’d laid in his arms.

I looked up when the last word fell from my lips.

Luke’s eyes held mine.

I couldn’t speak. I didn’t know if he could either.

“Damn, Alexa.”

“Damn good or damn bad?” My voice quivered. If he said bad I would pack up the guitar. I might hide in the closet, or head back to the airport. That song said everything.

“Damn, you have replaced that album of mine.”

I let myself smile. “Really? You liked it?”

“I don’t know shit about the music business, but you have to record it.”

“I can’t.” I shook my head.

“Why not?” His brows pinched together. I’d seen that irritated look on his face before.

“I have a contract. My label didn’t sign up for an indie sound. They want the country sweetheart bit. The next twenty-four songs are already chosen and paid for. But you think it’s that good?”

“I think your voice and that song are fucking perfect.”

I had platinum albums. Chart topping hits. A Grammy. But nothing felt as good as this compliment from Luke.

“I’m going to figure out how to record it,” I decided aloud. “Thank you.”

“Can I hear it again?”

I realized the night was winding down. In the morning I’d have to sneak a ride to the airport. I’d have to leave Luke. And I didn’t know when we would see each other again. How was this ever going to work? His schedule? My schedule? The seconds ticked by. I wanted to dig into every moment we had left until I took off in the air. Hold on to time as if it were something I could lock in a box and control.

I didn’t want any of it to end. What if the miles were enough to loosen what tied us together?

He stole my breath. He captured my spirit. He owned my body.

“Yes.” I nodded. And I played it for him three more times.

I lowered the guitar next to my knee.

“Alexa,” Luke breathed.

We both leaned closer. The air between was charged with something magical. Something sensual. My lips tingled waiting to be taken by his hungry mouth. My nipples hardened under the soft fabric of his Warriors’ T-shirt.

He looked at me with a ravenous gaze. Shit. This was going to be amazing. His hand drifted to my knee and brushed over my stomach, before taking my breast in his rough grasp.

“Ohh,” I moaned. He flicked over my nipple and grinned like the devil he was.

“That song turned me on.”

“It did?” I choked another groan.

He had pushed the shirt over my breasts so they faced him, naked and perked for his hot mouth.

“Fuck, it did. Your voice. Your lips.” He ran his tongue over the sensitive buds.

I didn’t know how two people could keep having sex like this, but we could. I started to believe Luke and I were meant for each other. It sounded insane, but we couldn’t get enough. Our bodies craved to be bonded and fused together. And if they weren’t they ached and cried for the other.

We were only satisfied when he sank inside me, filling me, fucking me, making me his one and only.

I felt the wet rush against my thigh. He could fuck me now without any foreplay and I’d soak his cock the way he liked it. Luke made me feel as if everything my body did for him was natural. What I had once thought was too forward or shameful, wasn’t dirty. It was right for us. It was beautiful and expressive.

His eyes lit. He knew it. “Fuck, you’re meant for me.”

I nodded, taking his mouth with a vicious kiss. My tongue threaded over his, sucking and biting. He yanked the T-shirt from my head, palming my nipples eagerly.

“There are so many things I want to do to you,” he growled.

“God, yes. Every one of them,” I agreed.

He latched onto one of my nipples. I ran my fingers through his hair, smiling at the way he was greedy with my body. He took full possession of it every time he touched me. The buzz swirled in my head. Luke made me feel drunk with horniness. It was delicious and wicked. His hand slid to my center, cupping my heat. He teased over the thin fabric of my underwear.

“Oh, baby. Strip down for me. I’m fucking you on the couch.”

I stood, shimmying the panties from my legs. I kicked them off my ankles, losing them under the coffee table. I was breathless, waiting for him.

“I’ll be right back.” He pointed to the bedroom. “I might double up on those suckers this time.”

“Right,” I whispered.

We hadn’t talked about the condom breaking again, but it was best we didn’t tempt another powerful orgasm. The way Luke showed his want for me was liable to split another one.

I stretched out on the cool leather, barely able to contain myself. Every nerve I had was alive with pure lust. I lifted my hair off my neck in a sexy pose when I froze. Panic ran through my body. The lust turned to fear.

The backdoor to the utility room beeped and it slammed shut.

I heard loud footsteps walk through the kitchen.

A loud voice boomed through the hall. “Where the fuck are you, Luke?”

18

Luke

I grabbed the entire box of condoms from the nightstand. I hated the idea that Alexa was leaving in the morning. I didn’t know if I could say that to her in words. But my body sure as hell could fuck it in to her. She’d know by the time she left the ranch that she was mine. She was coming back to me.

The timing couldn’t be worse. The season had just started, and I had more shit going on right now than usual. But I wasn’t letting this girl go.

I heard a scream and sprinted down the hall.

“What the fuck, Linc!” I hollered at my brother who was gawking at a very naked Alexa on the couch.

She had tried to arrange pillows to cover herself up.

“So I guess this is a thing.” He eyed her then me.

“Turn your fucking back, you pervert.” I didn’t have frilly blankets and throws. I ran back to the bedroom and grabbed a quilt on the end of the bed.

I hurriedly wrapped Alexa in it.

“Shit, I’m sorry.”

She made a triple wrap and secured it under her arm.

“Who is that?” she asked.

“My brother,” I grumbled.

“Hey, you’re the one who left the door open. No tie or sock on the door. That’s the universal signal for somebody’s gettin’ some.” He laughed. He extended his hand. “Sorry, to meet you like this. I’m Linc, Luke’s older and much more handsome and wiser brother.”

“Hi.” She was suddenly shy and quiet. “Alexa.”

“What are you doing over here?” I quizzed him.

“Not trying to bust up your night.” He kept stealing glances at Alexa.

“Then what?”

“I wanted to talk to you about the campaign. I’m sure you two saw all the headlines.”

Alexa shook her head. “Not for a while. We turned everything off. It was too crazy.”

Linc looked surprised. “It’s the biggest headline tonight. You’ve made all the news cycles. You’re the hottest couple right now. Although no one can come up with a word that combines your names. You’ve stumped them. I did hear ‘ALuxi”, but that’s just dumb.”

“B-but…” Alexa’s eyes darted to me.

“We’re not a couple, Linc.” I stared hard at my brother.

“Just fuck buddies?”

“Hey.” I glared at him.

“Sorry.” He grimaced at Alexa. “Didn’t mean to offend you. I’m just calling what I see. You two are clearly in the same house after the press caught you making out at the hospital. And the girl was completely naked when I walked in. Looks like you are something.”

I sat next to Alexa. Linc wasn’t going to believe any of this shit. But he was the only one I trusted. He was always the only one I could trust.

“Linc, we aren’t going public with this.”

His mouth dropped. “What?”

“Maybe we should talk in the study,” I suggested.

Alexa sat forward. “I’d kind of like to be involved since this is about me. About us.”

Her blue eyes convinced me.

“Ok. Fine.” I put an arm around her. I didn’t know where all this protective instinct came from, but it was there when I was near her. “Alexa is off limits. Her brand. Her image. All of it. She and I are keeping this private.”

Linc finally took a seat across from us in my recliner. “You are fucking with me, aren’t you?”

I shook my head. “No.”

Alexa spoke up. “Linc, this is not the way I wanted us to meet either.” She blushed. “But Luke and I have an agreement and we need your help. I can’t be involved with him publicly. Country music fans aren’t very forgiving when it comes to his kind of reputation.”

I saw Linc pull his shoulders back. “Luke is a good guy.”

“I know he is.” She smiled. “That’s why I’m willing to take this chance. But nonetheless it’s a chance. The fewer people who know the better.”

“You two are serious about this?”

He looked between us.

“Yeah, we are. It can’t be part of the campaign to build my new brand. I have to do it on my own without Alexa. Understand?”

“I do. But she could help you, brother.”

“It could ruin me.” Alexa’s eyes flared.

I didn’t want her to have to defend her position. We had already agreed how this was going to go. Linc had to get on board.

“It’s not going to.” I squeezed her shoulder. “Not a word of this to Charlie.”

He shook his head. “I won’t mention it.”

“Today was the last time I’ll ever use Alexa like that.”

“Got it.” He nodded.

“Good. Then will you get the hell out of my house so we can get back to what we were doing?” I held up the box of condoms.

Alexa yelped and scrambled to hide them from my brother.

I laughed.

“I’m out. I’ll talk to you tomorrow I guess.”

He strolled out of the living room. “Nice to meet you, Alexa.”

“Umm, yeah.” She was still trying to wrestle the box from my hands.

We heard the door close behind him.

“So that was your big brother?”

“Yep. The one and only.” I was focused on figuring out how to get my hands on her. I didn’t want to talk about Linc.

“Do you like having him as your manager?”

“Yeah. I can trust him, which means you can trust him.” I eyed her. The Canton brothers wouldn’t betray her. I wanted those doubts erased right away.

“That’s nice you have someone in your corner.”

“You don’t have anyone on your team like that?”

“My stylist, Helena. We’re close. I can tell her pretty much anything. She’s great. Really.”

“Alexa Wilde, what am I going to do with you?”

I tugged on the quilt that had her twirled up like Cleopatra in a Persian rug.

“I don’t know.” She bit her bottom lip.

“Liar,” I growled.

Our eyes locked and I only had one thing on my mind. I was going to use every fucking last condom in this box tonight.

19

Alexa

I didn’t realize Austin looked so small from the sky. I tried to identify Luke’s ranch but I was all turned around once we took off. I sighed and planted my forehead against the Plexiglas window.

I didn’t want to leave.

He had to shove me out the laundry door and into Linc’s truck. Linc had volunteered to drive me to the airport so we didn’t have to risk a loose-lipped driver telling someone he had driven Lexi Wilde from Luke Canton’s house.

It took a few minutes to get over the awkwardness of how Linc and I met when I was naked, but he was a nice guy. He was a slightly softer version of his brother. Still incredibly good looking and sexy. But I looked at him through different eyes now that I had Luke. Linc was playful and fun, while Luke maintained a brooding edge that I couldn’t help but find irresistible.

Jake was livid I had ignored him all day. I knew he would be waiting when I landed. Fuming. Glaring. Threatening.

I closed my eyes. It was worth it. Another night with Luke was worth anything I had to face when I was in Nashville. For two days I was able to be with him the way I’d always wanted to be with a man. Free. Exotic. Sensual.

I leaned into the leather first class seat. I had a mimosa in front of me, but I sipped it hesitantly. I needed every brain cell firing at full capacity when I faced Jake. He would throw every bit of ammunition he had. He would bring up the beginning. I knew he would.

I wondered what it would be like to show up in Nashville with Luke. One angry glare from him and Jake would back off. But Luke wasn’t my bodyguard. He couldn’t fight my battles. And I didn’t want him to know the secret Jake held over me. It could change everything. How Luke looked at me. How he felt.

I scooted the mimosa to the edge of the tray table. Ginger ale or a lime spritzer sounded better. I waved down the flight attendant and asked for another drink. In two hours I’d be on the ground.

Farther from Luke. Away from his bed. Out of reach of his arms.

I didn’t know if I was landing in the middle of the dream I had spent the past seven years creating, or running from the new one I wanted.

***

I slid the tortoise brown sunglasses over my eyes as I disembarked from the plane. I carried my guitar and heavy leather bag with me. I hoped it made me look like an up and comer. The way I used to look when I first started playing music.

As soon as I made it to baggage claim I realized my face was too recognizable to get away with that trick. There were a few reporters who staked out the baggage area regularly.

“Lexi! Lexi!”

I shielded my face, smiling as I side-stepped the men.

There was a firm grip on my elbow and I inhaled the strong scent of Jake’s cologne. He pecked me on the cheek.

“Good to see you, babe.”

He waved off the cameras before they took a few snaps.

“Hi.” I smiled sweetly.

“We need to talk.” His fingers dug deeper into my arm.

“There’s nothing to talk about.” I think it was my nonchalant attitude that set him off more.

He practically pushed me in the back of the Escalade.

“Ouch, Jake.” I rubbed my elbow.

The driver stepped out to help with my guitar.

I glared at my manager. “What’s your problem?”

“You,” he seethed. “You can’t decide you aren’t going to fly home. You can’t turn off your phone.” He leaned in next to me. “And you can’t be seen kissing that asshole Luke Canton.”

I laughed. “You need to get laid, Jake. You are way too uptight.”

“Oh, so you got some and now you’re happy and walking on a cloud.”

I looked out the window, ignoring him. “Maybe.”

“Damn it, Lex. You did sleep with that Neanderthal, didn’t you? Look.” He waited until we pulled away from the curb to start his full tirade. I knew this was coming. “I think I have this situation contained, but it could have been catastrophic. Do you remember what happened to Whitney Rivers? Should I remind you about her story?”

“That’s crazy.” My stomach did a flip.

“Crazy? She got pregnant. A single girl pregnant, singing country music? It was professional suicide. That girl had ten number one hits. Ten. And now she has a baby. She’s a walking country song. No man. A baby on her hip. No job.”

I rolled my eyes. “She could put out another song if she wanted to.”

He huffed. “You think she could? Last I checked no label would touch her. This isn’t rock. This isn’t pop. It’s fucking country music, Lex. She is finished. You know it. I know it.”

“Well, last I checked you can’t get pregnant from kissing. And in case you’re wondering that toilet seat thing is a rumor too,” I smarted off.

“This is a joke to you? Your brand is a fucking joke?” Jake tugged on his expensive cufflinks. “I made you, Lex and I can take you down faster than you can strut your little ass on stage.”

“You wouldn’t,” I countered.

“I would and I will if you try this kind of stunt again.”

He was bluffing. There was no way he’d ruin me and lose his golden ticket. It didn’t make sense.

“I think it’s tiring how you constantly threaten me, Jake. We both know it would ruin you too.” I rolled my eyes. “So, we’re stuck. We are fucking stuck. Let me live my life and you can live yours.”

His expression changed. There was a gleam in his eye. A twinkle I hadn’t seen in a long time. There was an uncomfortable nervousness in my belly. He was up to something.

“Jake?” I softened my tone.

“You had your few days of fun. I’m sure he was a good roll in the sheets. Hell, he should be. But trust me, he is dangerous.”

“He is not dangerous.” I didn’t know why I continued to argue with him.

“Oh yeah? What about the bar fights? The hotel suites he trashed from partying? The whores?” His eyes narrowed.

I couldn’t let Jake turn my time with Luke into something ugly. It wasn’t. I’d never seen those things Jake talked about.

I knew Luke. Yes, he had a rough exterior. But how else was he supposed to act when he had to be the strongest, toughest guy on the field? He was the kind of guy who drank too much. Let off too much steam. But Jake didn’t know there was vulnerability under Luke’s hardened exterior.

He was smart. He was funny.

He was protective. And he brought me back to life.

“Shut up, Jake,” I hissed.

“Don’t cross me, babe.”

I looked out the window. I had to find out what Jake had before he unleashed my past on the world. Because if there was one thing I knew, it was that the secret he had would strip away the fans. It would peel away the accolades. It would steal away the adoration from the press. I’d be left standing alone. Outcast. Shamed. Wrecked.

20

Luke

The sweat dripped from my brow. “Again!” I yelled.

I lined up to take the snap. The ball landed in my hands and I counted back to throw to James. He had run the wrong route again. Damn it. Where was his head today? Up his ass?

“No!” I roared over the practice field. “Do it again.”

Three hours into practice and I refused to let the kid take a shower until he had this right. He had the skills. I had seen them. He was fast. He had the hands. He just needed to take some time to study the playbook.

James ran toward me. He was sweating harder than I was. He gasped, gripping his thighs. “I don’t know if I can keep going. The sun is a bitch today. Can we run it tomorrow? I’ll get it tomorrow. Swear.”

I looked up at the sky as if I hadn’t noticed it before now. “You’re a Warrior.” I smiled. “Warriors play in the Texas heat, son.”

He was the youngest guy out here. He couldn’t be the most out of shape. There were some guys close to thirty not huffing as much as he was. I remembered he wasn’t from the south. He had to get his conditioning under control. Texas was torture, but I wouldn’t live or play anywhere else.

He scowled at me, but took his position behind the line. “On my count,” I ordered. I called for the snap, waiting for him to run the fucking route the way we talked about.

If he wanted to be a blocker the rest of the season I could make that happen. I was feeling unusually generous and less dickish today. I’d give him one more chance.

And then I saw him. Wide open. Ready. He cut left then right, throwing the defender off track. My eyes darted to the opposite side of the field before I hurled the ball forward. It was a perfect spiral. Damn, it hit him square in the chest.

“That’s it.” I jogged toward him. “That’s fucking it.” I laughed.

I slapped the back of his helmet with a few taps when I got to him. “Now we can hit the showers.”

James fell to the ground with a thud. His legs and arms flailing in all directions. “Thank God,” he groaned.

I chuckled. “You said you wanted advice, so here it is. QBs throw to the same guys in the game who can catch during practice. There’s some confidence going into Sunday that he’s going to catch the ball. Get it out here and you get it on Sunday. Understand?”

He rolled to his side, beating the ground with his fist. I knew he was hurting. I had run him hard. His eyes were closed. The trainers tried to step in, but I waved them off. Out here was my domain.

“Got it.”

It was the first time I’d actually given him a useful tip. A small glimpse into how I made decisions. I didn’t share often.

I knew I’d throw it to him. If he ran the route like that on Sunday, he would be my first target. I never made promises. The game always changed. Players were injured. Someone always had an unexpected breakout game. The circumstances unfolded like a storm on the field. And I was the one who had to navigate everyone through the lightning and blasting rain. This was my fucking ship.

Today’s grind felt good. Working my body to the point of exhaustion was something I was built for. And I realized how different it was showing up to practice sober. I had more speed. My engines fired with precision.

I walked off the field toward the locker rooms.

The trainer was waiting next to the tub. “I have everything ready for you, Canton. Just like you like it.”

The cold water filled the tub. I could almost feel the water on my skin now. I threw my gear in the equipment bin and plunged one leg and then another into the water. Robbie tipped the bucket and a fresh avalanche of ice floated on top of the water.

I exhaled, letting my head rest on the hard surface behind my skull.

“How are you feeling?” the trainer asked.

“Good,” I grunted. I wanted to let the heat evaporate. I was on fire.

“Your neck isn’t bothering you?”

“No.” I had an injury last season that had irritated me off and on, but it never kept me out of a game. Robbie asked like clockwork.

Somewhere in that twisted head of his he wanted there to be something wrong. Something he could fix. There were plenty of guys on the team who could use help. I wasn’t one of them.

“I’ll check back with you in a few.”

“Hey, grab my phone for me.” I pointed to where it was lying on the top shelf in my locker.

“Here you go.” Robbie passed it over the ice cubes and walked off so I could soak in silence.

There was no one else in the rehab room with me. I pressed Alexa’s number and waited for her to answer.

“Hey.” Her voice was like pure heaven in my ear.

“How was the flight?”

She’d landed this morning and had been in Nashville for the entire day, but this was the first chance I had to call her. Team meeting followed by practice. After showers I had another meeting with Applewhite. It would be ten o’clock before I was at the ranch again.

“Good. Fine.” She sounded stiff.

“Is someone there?” I asked.

“I’m in the studio,” she explained.

“I thought you had a break.” The ice started to melt around me.

I had this mental image of her doing the same thing I was. Soaking her tight body in a marble tub. Her hair over her shoulders. Her tits bobbing on the water while the bubbles gathered at her curves. Fuck, it made me hard. I wanted to get in that tub with her and splash the water on her expensive tile floor until she was delirious from my cock pounding inside her. Hell, I had it bad for this girl.

“I sort of burned through it when I took that extra day with you,” she whispered.

“Any regrets?” I grinned. I already knew the fucking answer.

“No. None.”

“Good.” I saw Robbie on his way back. He was just on the other side of the glass window where the other guys were talking about practice. I had to make this quick. “I’ll try to call later. It will be late though.”

“That’s ok. I don’t know when we’re going to finish here.”

I wanted to ask her what she was working on. Was she recording the song she played for me last night in the living room? Had she approached Jake with the idea of expanding her audience? I thought it was a hell of an idea. If she could convert me to a fan, she could hook anyone.

Robbie’s hand was on the door. “Gotta go, baby.”

I tossed the phone on a dry towel folded on the bench.

“More ice?” he offered.

“Nah.” I shook him off. I hauled my large body from the tub. “I’ve got a meeting with Applewhite.”

Robbie handed another towel to me. I draped it around my hips and shuffled to the lockers. A few minutes later I was dressed and ready to run the playbook with Coach.

I headed up to his office with my notepad and the binder for this week’s game. It changed, depending on the opponent. There was a full team roster along with their most popular plays. There was no way to count on the injury report until minutes before the whistle blew. I made my decisions with the information I had.

I rapped on the outside of the door.

“Come on in,” he called.

We did this every week. Three days before the game we sat down and discussed the final strategy. Last time I was in this office he had handed my balls to me on a platter.

I spread my materials out on his desk. “I’ve got my first two drives set.”

We were past pretending we needed to small talk.

“Before we get to that I wanted to ask how things are going with Charlie.”

“You could have fucking warned me she didn’t have a dick.” I eyed him.

He laughed. “Yeah, she’s not a man. She’s the best in the business though. She keeps a low profile, but she has resurrected quite a few AFA careers. You can be sure of that.”

“I’m also sure she’s got her shit in my business.” I glared at him. I wasn’t giving up this fight.

“I’m counting on her to bring us a win.”

“I bring the wins,” I growled. Charlie might be good at her job, but she wasn’t the one the fans rooted for. They didn’t give a shit about a beautiful woman in a designer suit calling the shots on my personal life.

“It’s already working though. Had a call from McCade this morning. He liked the article on your donations to the children’s wing and was impressed with your visit to see the kids. He’s looking the other way right now and that’s what you want.”

“I’m only doing this because you threatened me with a league ban,” I snarled. “I didn’t get that girl pregnant. She played him for a complete fool and took him to the bank.”

As soon as I said it I thought about Alexa. I wondered what she would think if she knew there was some chick out there, claiming I was going to be a dad. And I couldn’t help but think about whether Alexa had gotten on a plane, carrying my child. That one moment of panic when I saw the broken condom had unfurled into dreams that I had planted my baby inside her. I didn’t know if it made me an asshole that it turned me on so much, or a real man who had found the right woman to give him a baby. I shook my head. It was too fucking confusing to sort out right now.

“I was trying to give you a compliment.” Coach pulled on his visor. “Let’s just forget it. I’ll let Charlie handle you where your image is concerned and you and I will focus on football.”

“I think we need to do that.”

We agreed on one thing. Only one fucking thing.

21

Alexa

My hands shook. My stomach flipped and tossed with nerves. I didn’t know how I was going to get through this. The doorbell rang and I jumped from the couch.

I rushed through the hallway, almost skating on the hardwoods to open the front door.

“Hey, girl.” Helena wrapped me in a hug. “Cute hair.”

“Thanks.” It was up in my standard ponytail.

I closed the door and set the alarm behind her. “Thank you for coming over. I didn’t think I could do this alone.”

“Sure thing. You know I’m a huge fan. It’s going to be fun.”

She followed me into my den. Her eyes widened when she saw the spread I had made.

“We’re going to eat all of this?”

“Ok, so I don’t know what people eat when they watch football. Did I overdo it?”

She plopped down on the couch. “Slightly overboard, but I don’t care. It looks amazing.” She scooped up some cheese dip on the end of a piece of toasted pita.

I sat next to her. My nerves were completely shot. “I don’t know if I can even watch.”

Helena picked up the remote and turned up the volume. “He’s going to be fine. He’s a big strong guy. Stop worrying. He does this all the time.”

I looked at the screen. Luke was throwing the ball on the sideline. My insides began to melt. He looked irresistible. I felt a sudden heaviness. I missed him terribly. More than I should.

“All I know is that guys play football and get concussions and have career-ending injuries. What if that happens to him? What if they have to haul him off on a stretcher?”

Helena rolled her eyes. “That’s not going to happen. Have you seen the guys paid to surround him? The Warriors’ offensive line is intense.”

I picked at the veggie tray. I was craving cucumbers. “I’m glad you came over. I promised him I’d watch, but I didn’t realize it was going to freak me out. And you know so much more about football than I do.”

She giggled. “The advantage of having three brothers I guess. Besides, I think this whole thing with Luke is cute, and I love being in on the secret love affair,” she teased.

“That makes it sound so sordid.”

“Well is it?” She curled her knees under her and leaned into the oversized cushions. I’d had this room decorated a year ago and I was already thinking of how I could redo it. It was one of twenty in the house.

I turned an instant red color. I probably matched the peppers I had sliced.

“Maybe a little.”

She sighed. “I knew it. He’s way too hot not to be amazing in bed.”

“Ok, I’m really not going into those details.”

But God did I want to. I wanted to tell someone how incredible Luke was. How he made me feel things I didn’t know were possible. How my body moved a certain way for him. That I’d experienced eroticism that was addictive and potent. That if I didn’t see him soon my body was going to erupt in an explosive fire that he had started. It had been burning for him ever since our last kiss.

I pulled a pillow to my chest. “I don’t think I can watch.”

“The Warriors are the favorites to win. Stop worrying. He is going to kick ass today.”

I somehow managed to let the pillow drop low enough so I could see over the edge. Luke was on the field. I couldn’t take my eyes off him. He looked powerful. In command. Strong and confident. I held my breath until he took the snap.

And then it was as if all my worries faded as I let the air from my lungs. He was faster than the defense. He was smarter than the other team. He knew how to outstep them. In a split second the ball was out of his hands and soaring down field. It landed in the arms of one of the Warrior receivers.

Helena gleamed at me. “See? He’s fine.”

I nodded with a smile. “He is.”

My shoulders relaxed. The jitters eased. My fears weren’t Luke’s. He didn’t look terrified. Nothing around him fazed him. He ruled that field.

“Are we having wine at this party or what?”

“Oh sorry.” There was a time out on the field for a referee review. “What would you like?”

“Whatever you’re drinking.”

I stopped. Was I drinking? It was absurd not to. I’d already decided the chance of me being pregnant was only my runaway tendency to worry taking over. But there was that thought in the back of my head. What if I was? What if I was carrying Luke’s baby and getting ready to douse it in wine?

“I’ll find something,” I offered.

I had filled Helena in on what happened with Luke—everything except the broken condom. It was the one piece of the story I had deliberately left out.

I looked through my liquor cabinet to see what I could concoct. I pulled out the cranberry juice, vodka, and spritzer. In one glass I added vodka. In the other I doused an extra splash of the spritzer. There. She’d never know I wasn’t drinking.

I returned just as the game came back from commercial.

“Here you go.” I handed her the tall Cosmo.

“Oh, yummy.” She took a sip. “Delish.”

“Good.” I wiggled back onto my spot on the couch.

The Warriors won the dispute and Luke had the ball again. His eyes were narrowed in concentration.

I’d never felt such a rush before watching football. I think it made me miss him more.

There was a deep pang in my chest and an ache in my core. I curled into a ball. I was glad Helena was here, but I wanted Luke. I wished I could be there with him after the game.

“So, we haven’t even talked about tomorrow.”

“What do you mean?” I was trying to focus on the next play.

“The Country Year Awards are going to be announced and you aren’t even batting an eyelash about them.”

Someone crossed over the line and grabbed a fistful of Luke’s jersey. I jerked to the edge of the couch. He had thrown the ball before the defender got to him. He was fine. Yelling enough curse words to fill a sailor’s bible, but fine.

I turned to her. “I’m not hung up on that stuff. You know that.”

“Yeah, but Jake is.”

“Can we not talk about him?”

I didn’t want my good mood to sour.

“Sorry.”

“It’s ok. He and I aren’t on the best of terms right now and it’s going to be a long time before he forgives me for spending an extra day in Austin. All he can talk about is how my image has taken a hit from being seen with Luke. I’m tired of hearing about it.”

“And you can’t tell him that?” Helena always wanted me to stand up to Jake, but she didn’t know the full story.

“No.” I lowered my eyes and voice together. “It’s complicated with Jake.”

“Oh look, they’re going for it.” Helena’s eyes darted to the TV.

We both jumped from the couch when we saw Luke rear back and throw the ball to the other end of the field. That had to be at least forty yards, but I wasn’t paying attention. All I saw was his form. His body. His touchdown.

Helena reached in the air for a high-five. I giggled.

My crush was bad. So so bad.

22

Luke

The locker room was always fucking loud, but after a win like tonight, we might as well have been in the middle of a mosh pit. I couldn’t hear the guy next to me. We had crushed the them. We ran up the score, and I didn’t give a shit.

I had proved a point tonight. The Warriors needed me—no matter what my image was. They could fuck off.

“Canton, going out for drinks with us?”

I eyed the rookie tight end. He had done his job. When it came to clutch time, James had been solid.

The locker room already smelled like a fucking brewery. I thought about grabbing a few beers with the guys, and then I thought about stumbling home alone. I’d walk into the ranch. Dark. Cold. Empty.

I could do what I usually did after a game. Find a piece of ass that wanted to fuck me. A girl who knew I wouldn’t call her tomorrow. A girl who wanted to get her claws in me as long as I put my cock in her.

But I didn’t want that.

“Maybe I’ll see you out there.”

I knew I wasn’t going to a bar. I wasn’t going to hook up. I wasn’t taking a stranger home. There was only one person I wanted to spend tonight with.

“I’ll text you,” James offered.

I nodded. “Yeah.”

I didn’t care that my body was sore and bruised. I didn’t care tomorrow was a rest day. It had been four days since I had seen Alexa and that was four days too long.

I grabbed my bag and walked out of the tunnel. I had press to do, but as soon as I was done I was headed to the airport.

***

It was dark by the time I pulled into the windy driveway. I looked around expecting to see a guard gate, but I had to remind myself this was Nashville. I was in the country. Not everyone had the kind of access I did to tracking down Alexa’s address.

I hoped she at least had a security system. She needed to be careful. There were crazy fans out there. People who could show up here. I needed to talk to her about adding some level of security.

I climbed the wide steps, noticing the swing on the wraparound porch. I pushed the button for the doorbell. Small flames flickered in gaslight lamps on the porch. The place had the right amount of charm, but I could definitely tell a woman lived here. I’d never have a swing or copper lamps.

The door cracked slightly and then I heard a squeal before it opened wide.

“What are you doing here?”

I picked her up in my arms. “Surprise visit.”

My mouth covered hers in hungry pursuit of her lips. I growled, sucking them and holding her close to my body. Her lips parted as my tongue twisted along hers with dominate strokes.

Her legs wrapped around my waist and I pressed her into the closest wall, grinding into her.

“Oh God, this is the best surprise,” she whispered between kisses.

“I thought so.” I dipped to the V at the base of her throat.

She was wearing cutoff shorts that rode up the curves of her ass. My fingers dug into her skin.

“I can’t believe you’re here. I just saw you on TV.”

“You watched the game?”

She nodded. “All the way to the end,” she moaned when my teeth took her earlobe with a rough nip. “And that turn over …,” she moaned.

“Keep talking football to me, baby.”

“The touchdowns. I loved the touchdowns.”

“Fuck, say touchdown again.”

“Touchdown.” Her voice was laced with raspy seduction.

Too fucking hot.

“I was happy you won.”

“Me too.”

I had to get her out of these clothes. I had to feel her. Taste her. Touch her. Fuck her senseless. My cock hardened. I wanted to be inside this girl more than I’d wanted anything.

“Do you want me to guess where your bed is?” I asked, squeezing her bottom urgently. “Or should I fuck you here?”

She sucked in for air. God, she was so dirty. So horny. So fucking perfect. She was thinking what I was. The bed was too many steps to walk. I turned and deposited her on a round table in the foyer, gripping the band of those tiny shorts.

I dragged them over her hips and off her thighs. Her hands wrapped around my neck, drawing me back to her lips.

“Fuck me here,” she pleaded.

“Oh, I am, baby. I was only asking to be polite.” I grinned wolfishly.

I slid her panties to the side enough to push my fingers inside her soaking entrance. I growled. Fuck.

She whimpered when I withdrew them and reached in my back pocket for a condom. I’d put one there as soon as I packed my bag at the ranch, anticipating this exact moment. I shed the jeans, and shoved my boxer briefs to my ankles. Alexa sighed at the sight of my cock bobbing along with my throbbing ache. I rolled the condom on. I hadn’t forgotten what I promised her. One day I was doing this without one of these damn things.

I yanked the T-shirt over her head, smiling at her perky breasts. I licked each one while I nestled my cock between my legs and with a solid thrust I buried myself inside her.

Her heels dug into my ass as she screamed out. I planted my palms on the table, driving into her again. It was fucking nirvana being inside this girl. She was tight. She was wet. She was hotter than a roaring fire.

She looked sexier than fuck with the tatters of her panties clinging to her hips while my cock pulsed in and out of her.

“You’re fucking gorgeous, baby.” I cradled her face, sucking a kiss from her lips.

“Ohh, God. You don’t know what you do to me, Luke.”

I pushed deep inside her. “I think I do.” I squeezed a nipple between my fingers and twisted slightly until she cried out. “It’s what you do to me.”

“Ahh, please. I want more.”

My spine tingled and seized. I was ready to come. Ready to fuck her hard.

I picked her up, she wrapped her body around me. I kissed her, inhaled her, devoured her, roaming her halls. Stopping every few steps to slam into her the wall with my cock.

“Oh, fuck, Luke.” Her hands splayed in convulsive quickness. I pumped a few times, knowing I was reaching my peak, before I peeled her off the wall and took a few more steps.

I had no idea where I was in the house. We weren’t talking. We were fucking. I wanted to sear my cock inside her pussy. I wanted her to know Luke Canton didn’t fly a thousand miles just for anyone. He didn’t do shit like this.

I was here because I wanted her.

23

Alexa

Luke turned down another dark hall. I couldn’t see his expression, but I could feel his hands clutch my ass before he shoved me against another wall and drove into me with an explosive thrust of blinding ecstasy. Every time I felt his muscles go rigid as if his release was about to be uncaged, he would hold off, showing more restraint than I had. Luke was in complete control. I never knew when the next wave was coming. It was dark and he was unpredictable.

I didn’t care what room we found. I only cared that he kept pumping in and out of me like this. Like he missed me. Like he couldn’t wait to be with me again. Like he was trying to tell me we belonged to each other.

My hands tangled in his hair. He stopped again and I felt the tip of his cock pull out before he reared back and slammed into me.

“Fuck, Alexa,” he growled.

“Oh, God.” It was building. We were throwing gasoline on a fire. A fire that wasn’t going to be satisfied tonight, or any other night.

He kicked a door open. I half-opened an eye to see that we were in the game room. It was one of the rooms my designer insisted I needed as a celebrity. I never came in here. It was a complete waste of money.

“What’s in here?” he asked.

“Game stuff,” I answered roughly. “It’s a play room for fun.”

His eyebrow waggled. Ok, maybe it was a complete waste of money to a girl. Luke liked the idea.

He peered into the darkness until he spotted what he was looking for.

I followed his stare as he carried me toward the custom made pool table with my logo embellished in the center. Every one of the balls had L W stamped on them.

“I like your table.” I shivered when his teeth grazed over my shoulder.

I could barely speak. I had no idea what he was planning.

“Thank you,” I whispered.

“I’m going to love fucking you on it too.”

I sighed. I was aching for my release. For the orgasm that would rip through me with electric force and current. Every time he whispered in my ear, I wanted it more. I wanted to know where he could take me. What new plane my body would reach when Luke pushed me to test my sexual limits.

He never hesitated. And when I was with him I didn’t either.

My bottom hit the wooden border and he stepped back with a grin.

“Go on, baby.”

I looked in his eyes before I turned and crawled to the center of the table. I looked down at the swirly L and W. I was almost dripping with arousal for him. He’d fucked me through most of the house and now we were getting ready to blow the lid off the roof.

The table creaked as he climbed on behind me.

“So fucking hot.” He cupped my breast, raking his fingers over my sides and over the roundness of my bottom. “The sweetest pussy ever. You know that?”

I whimpered with want. He wasn’t touching me anywhere and I felt as if half of me were missing. I needed to feel him. I loved his body. His hands. His mouth.

“I flew here tonight because I missed this.” I felt his lips land on my lower back. “I’ve never missed anyone, Alexa.”

I dared to look over my shoulder. I couldn’t help it. I needed a connection with him.

“I missed you too,” I whispered.

His hands coasted down my thighs, prying my legs farther apart. It was almost here. The release. The spiral of bliss. The heat of his body burning inside of mine. My nipples perked and pebbled. My core twitched. My clit thrummed with pain.

My eyes locked on his as he nudged the head of his cock between my wet folds.

“What have you done to me?” he growled.

“The same thing you’ve done to me,” I answered.

Whatever it was between us, it was the same. I couldn’t think without him. I couldn’t breathe until he was in my space again, and my body sure wasn’t alive unless he was touching me.

“Who do you belong to?” His strong hands adhered to the contour of my waist, dragging my ass backward.

“You,” I moaned. “Please, Luke. Please fuck me.”

My nipples hurt. I wiggled toward him, but he had a constraining grip on me.

“Come with me,” he groaned. “Come on my cock so hard I can feel you.”

My eyes never left his as he slammed into me. One. Two. Three times and we both convulsed and shattered in violent jerks. He pulsed and surged, filling me, stretching me and I shook with complete abandon, letting the orgasm undo me.

My hips pushed into him harder. I sucked him inside me, begging him to take every space in my body and my soul. He had me. I was his. And he was mine.

“Oh, fuck, baby.” He kissed my neck and we collapsed together on the pool table.

I rested against his chest.

“I’m so happy you’re here,” I whispered. “Impulsive is hot.” My breathing hadn’t returned to normal.

He pressed his lips to my forehead. “Me too. I have to fly out tomorrow night to make it back for Tuesday practice.”

“I don’t want to think about that yet.”

We stretched our legs out to the end of the pool table. It was funny looking at the rest of the room from here.

“Think you can hide a six five QB for an entire day?” he teased.

“If by hiding, you mean keep you in my bed all day, then the answer is yes.” I giggled. I felt incredible.

“I get it if you have to go to the studio.” He drew a circle over my navel and I wondered what he was thinking about.

“I can call in sick,” I volunteered. “I can be spontaneous too.”

“I’m not asking you to miss work.”

“I know you aren’t. But when am I going to see you again?”

He shook his head. “I’m on the road next weekend. I can’t do this again for a few weeks.”

My heart sank. It wasn’t the answer I wanted to hear. How was I going to handle weeks without him?

“Maybe I can go to one of your games,” I suggested.

He readjusted under me so he could see my face. “You want to meet me on the road?”

I nodded. I was positive. “Yes.”

“How are we going to keep this out of the press if you travel with me?”

I bit my lower lip, trying to sort through the logistics. “Ok. What if I fly out ahead of time to … where are you playing next?”

“San Francisco.”

I shook my head. That wouldn’t work.

“After that we play the Sharks in DC.”

“DC? That’s close. Ok. I can find one of my charities or something and go out on Saturday. And I can take in the game Sunday in a box. A dark box,” I added. “We’ll meet in a hotel after the game. We’ll at least have the night together.”

“You’re more conniving than I thought. I’m impressed. There’s more naughty girl in there still.” He grabbed my ass and pulled me on top of him.

I relaxed into him, relishing the firm muscles and security of his body.

“I can be really naughty,” I teased.

“You keep proving that.”

The pool table was starting to get uncomfortable. “Want to watch the late game?” I asked.

“You have the Wranglers on?”

I nodded. “I was trying to study up when you rang the doorbell,” I explained. “There is a TV in here, but I have more comfortable rooms in the house.” I laughed. “Want to see?”

We sat up.

“Yeah, but I’m hoping this place has as many bathrooms in it.”

“Oh, right. There’s one behind the pinball machine.” I pointed.

Luke hopped off the table and returned a few minutes later.

“This is naked football, right?” he asked before turning to lift me off the pool table.

I would never be able to play a game here without blushing to my toes. We had officially christened and tarnished that L W logo at the same time.

“What?” My feet dangled over his arm. I felt petite and tiny in his massive arms.

There were no clothes in this room. There was a trail leading here like bread crumbs in the forest.

“You don’t know about naked football? You’re missing out on such an education.”

“Really?” I twisted my lips together.

“Point me to the TV,” he directed.

“Back to the front door and then off to the other wing.”

He shook his head. “This is a fucking maze, you know that, right?”

“It’s a little spacious.”

“It’s big enough for five kids and then some.”

The smile dropped from his face. And we stared in each other’s eyes.

24

Luke

Fuck. Why did I say that? Why did I bring up kids?

And at the same time I couldn’t stop thinking about it. This woman was mine, and it was becoming more clear to me that I wanted her to be mine in every way. Maybe even with my baby inside her.

“Which way?” I asked, dodging her probing eyes.

“If you insist on carrying me like this it’s going to take a while.”

“Just tell me.”

I wasn’t going to let her go. I wanted to hold her to my chest. Carry her. Protect her. And the fact that I had taken her the way I wanted, claimed her body once again, made this feel right.

“Ok, out of this room and then left. Down the hall and right to the front door.”

I retraced our original path, stepping over pictures I had knocked to the floor.

Alexa’s house was fucking ridiculous. It sprawled in every direction. From the front it was deceiving. I couldn’t tell that beyond the front door was where the labyrinth started. And she was here alone. I guessed this was what number one songs bought you.

I heard the sounds of a referee’s whistle. The game was on in a nearby room.

It was hard to believe that just a few hours ago I was doing the same thing. I was on the field, looking for James to get open. I was arguing with refs. I was yelling at my line.

And now I was holding a sexy beautiful woman in my arms. I had flown hours to see her. To surprise her. To do the unexpected.

And yet we were living in the shadows. Keeping it a secret. Hiding each other from the world. I didn’t know how long I could keep it up. I’d always lived my life wide open.

I looked up to see Brian Ross get sacked. I chuckled. Never liked the guy.

“Something funny?”

I settled us on the couch. It felt a hell of a lot better than the pool table. But I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that that moment was going to go down as one of the hottest fucks of my life. My cock throbbed.

I couldn’t get enough of her.

“Just watching that play. I don’t know why they called it.”

“What should they have done?” she asked.

“Not get sacked first of all.” I scowled. “But Seattle is always going to run that defensive play when there are four receivers lined up.”

“How do you know that?”

“This is what I do. I study them. I watch the games. I read, believe it or not.” I winked at her. “And that QB should know it. If he’s got four receivers going long Seattle is going to rush him in the fastest blitz they have. They don’t have the coverage for those four guys, so it’s their only chance to shut down the play.”

“Makes sense to me.” Her eyes were on the game.

“I would have pegged you for a cheerleader in high school. I can see you wearing one of those cute little skirts.”

“Nope.” She shook her head. “Couldn’t really afford stuff like that.”

“What do you mean?” I reached my arm around her and she nuzzled against my chest as if that was where she belonged.

“I didn’t grow up with money. This is all new to me.”

“Well most people don’t grow up with this kind of money, but you seriously couldn’t afford a cheerleading uniform?”

“My parents didn’t have extra cash. I didn’t even try to do that kind of stuff.”

I tried to picture Alexa poor without her manager. No private plane. No designer boots. The two images didn’t fit. I couldn’t reconcile a penniless girl with the one in my arms who lived in a palace and had her own stylist.

“I bet your parents are proud of you now.”

She had probably bought them a place. Somewhere with lots of land. Expensive furniture and a pool. Linc and I made sure our parents were taken care of. Last year I bought my mom a new Lexus. She loved that damn car. My dad hated she had gone with cherry red.

“They aren’t around.” Her voice softened.

I was going where I never went. Asking questions. Digging deeper.

“What happened, Alexa?”

“It’s embarrassing. No one knows except Jake, and he doesn’t want the press to find out and dig up a bunch of dirt on the whole thing.”

“What is it?” I didn’t know how it was possible for people to keep many secrets anymore.

She exhaled slowly. “My dad went to jail for a long list of petty crimes. Check fraud. Tax evasion. He was just trying to find ways to pay bills.” Her expression was anguished. “He’s not a bad guy. He just did things because he was desperate. He never would have tried them if he had money. He wouldn’t. He was laid off from the plant and things spiraled.”

“And your mom?”

“She lost the house when my dad went to jail. Her car was repossessed. She was in worse shape than he was. She was an aid at the library. Do you have any idea how much she made?”

I saw Alexa wipe at her cheeks with her palms.

“No.”

“Not enough to pay bills. It got worse. Much worse.” Her voice cracked. “She was alone.”

“What happened, Alexa?” I had to coax the story from her.

“With my dad in jail and no money she met someone online. And she left with him.”

I had stopped watching the game. I hit mute on the remote. “Where did your mom go?”

“To Mexico.” Alexa wiped at another tear. “But I don’t know if she made it. I don’t know if she’s there. All I know is that I can’t find her. And I’ve looked. I’ve hired investigators. I’ve spent money looking for her. Nothing has turned up. She’s a ghost. I think she’s dead.”

“Shit,” I whispered. That was fucked up. Fucked up for her. For her mom. For her dad. I didn’t know if I should hold her or get a detective on the phone myself. I wanted to do something.

“Yeah. See why it’s not something I talk about? It’s an embarrassment. My dad is in jail. My mom cheated on him. Ran away and she didn’t even bother to worry about her daughter. Not exactly the picture perfect story Jake wants out there for the country sweetheart I am.”

“What did you do? Where did you go when she left?” I didn’t give a shit about Jake right now. That asshole only had one priority and it wasn’t Alexa.

She sniffed once more, but I couldn’t tell if she was about to cry or if she had stopped herself. That was the end of the tears. “I moved to Nashville. I met Jake and the rest is history.”

“But she could be out there? You don’t know for sure.” There was a lot of uncertainty in Alexa’s past.

“I don’t think so. Wouldn’t she have come back by now? If you had a daughter who was worth a bajillion dollars, wouldn’t you show up?” she asked.

“Maybe she has too much pride. Maybe she doesn’t want to admit what she did was wrong.” I didn’t know her mom and I wasn’t taking the woman’s side. I didn’t know why people made shitty decisions. I’d made more than enough.

“I knew you were strong, but I didn’t know exactly how strong.” I wrapped my other arm around her. “You amaze me, Alexa.”

“Really? That entire story didn’t turn you off? You don’t think differently about me?”

“I do. I think you’re one hell of a woman. My woman.” I rolled her to face me. Her breasts draped over me, her nipples brushing my chest.

“I didn’t grow up like you and Linc. You don’t care?”

“No. Doesn’t matter what happened before the night I paid twenty-five thousand dollars to hear you sing.” I tried to make her smile.

“It’s such a dark secret,” she whispered.

“I know it is. But I’ll keep it.” I kissed her cheek, tasting the saltiness of her tears.

She rocked forward. “You promise, Luke?”

Her hips ground into my cock and it hardened into a thick rod. Holy fuck.

“I promise. I’ll never tell.”

I kissed her other cheek, my hand sliding over her ass and dipping between her legs, searching for her swollen clit.

She hissed as I eased one finger and then another inside her. She jerked up, sitting back on my fingers.

“Feel good?” I asked.

She closed her eyes. “Yes.”

“Fuck me like this a little. I want you to feel good. I always want to make you feel good.”

She clenched around me. Her walls tightening with measured strength, squeezing my fingers.

“Ohh,” she inched down, rubbing her heat over my cock.

She nodded as I pried and twisted her opening. God, I wanted in there. She glided down my body until my fingers were free and tilted her clit over my dick.

“Fuck, Alexa. Don’t do that.”

Her eyes fired. “Why not?” she asked wickedly.

“Because you know what I’ll do.”

She bounced forward in slow motion, dragging her nipples over my torso like twin peaks luring me to salvation or damnation—I couldn’t tell which.

My fingers dipped inside her again for a quick pump. I brought them to my lips, tasting the sweetness of her honey. I sucked on one and then the other.

Alexa wriggled until her belly grazed my shaft, reviving it with a new pulsing fever. She pushed up, licking her lips.

“You need to stop,” I warned. “The condoms are in the hallway with my bag. And that’s half a mile away in this house.”

“I don’t want them.”

“Then what do you want?”

She continued to bewitch me with the sway of her hips. The enticement of her tits.

“You’re powerful, Luke. And strong.” Her nails scraped over my abs, causing my stomach to flinch. It felt as if she were a fucking siren leading me to the edge of a cliff.

“Where are you going with this?” I was so hard I thought I might come now. She was tempting me with every inch of her body.

“Fuck me, Luke.”

“I want to, but I want things to be more under control with your birth control.” She was killing me. She didn’t know I had jerked off every night this week to the picture of coming deep inside her. Filling her with my cum.

She reached between her legs and her fingers landed on her clit. Her hair swept off her shoulders as her head reeled back.

“Stop it,” I commanded.

“No,” she groaned. “Fuck me.”

She strummed, whimpering with each stroke. I lost it. My dick only wanted one thing—to sink into her velvet walls. I tilted the base of my cock, until the head jutted toward her entrance.

“Oh God,” she moaned, sliding backward, sucking me in.

My arms wrapped around her, clutching her lower back. She rode with gentle thrusts, slanting her hips upward so I could hit her at the most intense angle.

I pulled her lips toward me, finding the warmth of her mouth and the silk of her tongue.

“Come on me, baby,” I urged. I wanted to feel it before I pulled out. I wanted her tightening on my dick. Squeezing me. Panting my name. Vibrating with pleasure.

I reached between us, clasping my fingers on her clit.

“Oh God,” she cried.

“Come for me,” I whispered in her ear. And I felt the wash of the orgasm consume her body. She rocked and spiraled, gasping for air.

Her eyes opened and I smiled. She might have seduced me into this, but I was still twice her size. I lifted her up and twisted her onto her back, sinking my shaft deep inside her. She arched her back, tilting for me. I pumped hard, enjoying the friction between us. Wanting more than this. Wanting to fill her belly.

“Oh shit, Alexa. Fuck.”

My spine tightened and I felt the clutch in my stomach.

I pumped again, before jerking out of her and covering her stomach with my golden seed. I reached forward, spreading it on her hard nipples.

“Oh, God.”

I grinned. “So fucking hot, baby. And so mine.”

“I am yours.” She leaned up to kiss me.

And it was still there. No matter how much sex we had. No matter how fucking deep things got between us. No matter how connected I felt to this girl. The question that had been plaguing me all week was there between us. It was tangible. It drew us together. When I looked in Alexa’s eyes was I looking into the eyes of the woman who was going to make me a father?

25

Alexa

My phone rang, but it was dark in my room. I hit the bedside table, knocking the lamp before I finally found it.

“Hello?” I croaked.

Luke snored next to me.

“Babe! It’s out.”

“What’s out?” It finally registered I was talking to Jake. I looked at my clock. It was only six.

“The CYA list. You’re up for female performer of the year, song of the year, video of the year, single of the year, and entertainer of the year. Babe, this is it. You are Nashville’s favorite girl.”

I rubbed my eyes and my feet touched the warm rug next to my sleigh bed. I pulled the silk kimono robe from the chair and threaded my arms through it. I padded into the bathroom, closing the door behind me so I didn’t wake Luke.

“Wow.”

“Wow? I’m coming over. We need to celebrate.”

“What? Now? No.” I panicked.

“Of course now. This is everything we’ve worked for. You couldn’t ask for better recognition than this, babe. You could completely sweep the entire awards show. I think we could have Helena meet us too. I’ll order breakfast catered and we’ll start on your wardrobe along with booking all the radio interviews. We need votes. Every vote. I want a full sweep. Your wardrobe has to be impeccable for every appearance.”

My head spun. I hadn’t slept. Luke was in my bed. And Jake would kill me if he found out.

I coughed into the phone. My voice already had an edge of early-morning raspiness. I could play this off.

“Jake, I feel terrible. My throat is scratchy and I was up most of the night with a fever.” It was a fever, just not the kind that was a result of germs.

“Today? Right now? You’re sick?”

“Jake!” I faked a coughing fit.”

“Sorry. Sorry. Do you have a doctor’s appointment? I’ll get someone to take you.”

I looked at my reflection, letting the robe fall to the side. My nipples were swollen. My neck was red and there were definite thumbprints between my thighs. It all felt divine. The imprint of the man who had changed my life was all over my body.

“No. No.” I hacked again. “I’ve got hot tea and some lozenges. I just need rest. I think a day in bed and I’ll be back to normal tomorrow. And then we can celebrate.”

“What a day to have this happen.”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, Lex. If you need something text me and I’ll have it delivered. Anything you need at all. Anything.”

“I will. Thanks.”

Jake was a complete germophobe. He wouldn’t come anywhere near my house until he knew it had been disinfected by a professional team.

“And congrats, babe. I’m proud of you.”

“Thank you.” It was one of those moments when I caught a glimpse of what we used to be. The days when Jake and I worked together for the same goal. When all we dreamed about was making it to the CYAs together. That seemed like another life. I didn’t recognize who we were anymore. All we did was fight and threaten each other. Our friendship was toxic.

“Talk to you later.”

“I’ll check on you in a few hours. Get some sleep. I can’t wait to call everyone else.”

I hung up and crept back to bed. Luke hadn’t moved. I placed my phone on silent mode. Jake would be the first call. Once the media had a chance to release the list and the rest of the world woke up to the news my phone would ring constantly. Friends would want to talk to me. Helena would have dress ideas. My old music teacher would try to call.

It was going to be an insane day.

The robe fell from my shoulders and landed on the floor.

Luke’s eyes opened. “Everything ok?” he asked.

My heart fluttered wildly. And my core pulsed.

I nodded. “Everything is fine. Just some news. You can go back to sleep,” I spoke quietly.

He was rugged and tough. He was cocky. He was sexy beyond definition. And his sculpted arms were stretched open for me.

I slid in next to him. He kissed my neck, rolling on top of me. His scruffy cheek was rough against my bare skin. I liked it when he didn’t shave.

I gasped when I felt his shaft pressed along my thigh. My legs fell to the side and with one thrust his was inside me. I sighed, feeling the wholeness of Luke fill me. His hands threaded through mine.

“Like last night, ok?” he whispered.

I nodded. And we spent the morning in bed, loving the hell out of each other.

***

Luke sat in the kitchen with a cup of coffee. After we showered and dressed I had spent most of the time on the phone. I had to continue to fake my illness, coughing and sputtering through my calls. So far I had offers for homemade soup, a basket of oranges, and some kind of vaporizing machine that was guaranteed to clear up my sinuses. I had turned all of them down as politely as I could.

“Thank you, thank you.” I was on the phone with the head of my label. He wanted to personally call and congratulate me on receiving the highest number of nominations any of his artists had this year.

“We’re so proud, Lexi. So proud.”

“I hope I can bring some home to the label.”

“Doesn’t matter,” he argued. “The nominations are their own reward.” I knew he was lying. Of course he wanted me to win. He wanted every one of those awards in his trophy room.

“Thanks again.”

“Sure thing. Now rest that voice of yours.”

“I will.”

I hung up and walked to the kitchen. My phone buzzed again. I looked at it regretfully.

“Get it. I understand.” Luke rose from the table to refill his mug.

“It will be quick. I promise.” I held up a finger. I’d much rather be spending my morning with him than dealing with all of these bullshit calls.

“Don’t worry about me. I have plays to study. I’ll head to that game room if I can find it again.” He winked and leaned over to kiss my cheek before walking out.

“Hey, Helena,” I answered.

“Girl, I heard you were sick. What am I going to catch? I do not want a cold. Or a sore throat. I spent the entire day with you yesterday and you seemed fine.”

I giggled. “Do you think you could catch Luke Canton?”

“I knew it!”

“No you didn’t. No one knows he’s here.”

“Ok, I didn’t, but I like it. Congrats on the nominations by the way.”

I filled my cup with coffee. “Thanks. I don’t think it’s really sunk in yet. I’m kind of distracted.”

“Yeah, I can see how that would happen with Mr. Sex Machine in the house.”

I almost spit out my first sip. “Helena!”

“Sexy Pants? Sex Master? I don’t know what pet name you gave him.”

“None of those.”

I sat at the table and looked out at the pool. The water was still and blue. I had thought about adding a fountain at one end, but I hadn’t started the planning yet.

“Well, I’m supposed to call you and start talking about the red carpet, and of course what you’re going to wear to perform, but we can do that when you’re alone.”

“Thanks. Couture isn’t on today’s agenda. But I am excited to talk about it.”

“Are you going to take him with you?”

“What?” I had lost focus on the pool.

“Luke? Is he going to be your plus one?”

I hadn’t thought about a date. “I-I can’t do that.”

“Don’t let Jake ruin this. It’s the biggest night of your career. You should take who you want. Take him. But please let me dress him to match you.”

I was living in bliss. I woke up in the middle of a dream. And now reality was smacking me back in place.

“It’s too much trouble. The fall out isn’t worth it.”

“Ugh. You should take him. He would be an amazing accessory. At least listen to that from your stylist. But I’ll let you go so you two can hang out. I’m excited for you, Lex. On everything. You deserve this. And you deserve him too if he’s what you want.”

“Thank you.” I smiled, ending the call. I decided I needed to unplug for a while. I turned the phone off.

I heard Luke’s footsteps behind me.

“I need your Wi-Fi password.”

“Oh. Yeah. Could we talk for just a second before you go back there?”

“What’s up?”

I was just going to do it. I was going to make all these dreams come true. I’d take Helena’s advice. She was right. I deserved it. I deserved Luke.

“Would you be my date for the CYAs?” I blurted it out before I could talk myself out of it.

Luke stared at me. “Are you fucking with me?”

“No.” I walked toward him. “I want you to be there with me. If you want to.” I looked into his dark eyes.

“Do I have to wear a tux?” He cracked a smile.

I twisted my lips. “Helena could probably find a tux that’s more your style. Does that mean you’ll go? Would you want to?”

His palm landed on my bottom. “See my girl kick everyone’s ass? Hell yeah I’ll go.”

I grinned so hard it hurt. “Oh my God. This is happening.”

He tipped my chin up. “I’ll be there.”

“It’s six weeks away, so I just need this time to convince Jake. Ok?”

I saw his playful look turn to a scowl. He hated Jake’s name. “You realize a lot can change in that amount of time?”

“W-what?” My eyes darted frantically.

Did he not think we could survive the weeks? Because what I felt was the kind of emotion that moved mountains. It was what songs were written from. It inspired epic movies. What connected Luke and me was crushing and suffocating and everything I’d always wanted.

His fingers tickled my belly. “This is what I’m talking about. You could be pregnant.”

“Oh,” I whispered. The relief was replaced with new alarm. Holy shit. I couldn’t go to the CYAs knocked up.

“Do you think you are?” There was something hopeful and sweet in his eyes. Jake had pegged him all wrong.

“I don’t know. It’s too soon to take a test or anything like that.”

“When can you?”

I swallowed. We were talking about this. Actually talking about taking a pregnancy test while we were standing in my kitchen on the day the CYA list came out.

“I-I haven’t really looked into it.”

“And is it ok for you to drink coffee?”

I looked at the full mug. “Coffee?”

“Yeah, I thought pregnant women had to stay away from that shit.”

“Luke, we don’t know that I’m pregnant and we’ve been careful every other time.”

“Have we?” He eyed me. “Last night? This morning? Pulling out isn’t birth control, baby.”

He had me there. It wasn’t. But when we were naked and I felt his body under mine all I could think about was having everything that was his. I wanted him in every way. He wanted it too. We were being careless and reckless. We were in no positon to have a baby. But every time I thought about it, the idea was less and less scary.

“I’m on the pill. I’ve taken it every day this week. Every day.”

He nodded. “Ok.”

But my fingers threaded through his and rested over my stomach. He kissed me, sucking on my lips.

“Can I get the password?”

“Oh yeah. It’s lovesong.”

He grinned. “Thanks.”

I watched him walk out of the kitchen. I had six weeks to break the news to Jake—he didn’t own me anymore. I belonged to someone else. Heart and soul.

26

Luke

Two weeks ago I was in Nashville. Tonight I was in DC, getting ready for our game against the Sharks tomorrow.

I had spent the day in a hotel suite studying the Sharks’ defense. I had seen it before, but I wanted to be prepared.

An hour ago Linc texted me. Charlie wanted to meet. I didn’t realize she traveled out of Austin for this kind of thing.

I sat across from Charlie. Linc was next to me.

She smiled. “We have a new strategy I want to go over with both of you.”

I hadn’t been in the headlines once in the past few weeks for anything other than winning games. There was no way in hell management was mad at me. I’d done everything Charlie asked I do. I was pissed I was in this meeting.

“What is it?” I asked. “Things seem to be fine.”

“They are fine because I have created a perfect plan. Without that and I can only imagine what you would do.”

I leaned forward. “I can handle it without you.” Linc’s hand was on my forearm.

“I think we have an opportunity to stir the Lexi Wilde rumors again.”

Fuck. I looked at Linc.

“Why would you want to do that, Charlie?” he asked. “That died down.”

She spun her laptop around so we could see her screen. “She’s in town this weekend, working with her children’s charities at the St. Regis Hospital.”

“So?” I balked.

“So. She’s in town and you’re in town. It should be easy to stage a run-in again. You two know each other. See what you can do with that.”

“I’ve already told you that’s not happening with her.”

“This girl has more good will capital than a girl scout troupe. She brings you up. People loved it. It’s a relationship dream ticket.”

I shook my head. Linc needed to get me out of this. I wasn’t fucking things up with Alexa. I promised her the brand was off limits.

“No. I’m not running for election.” I pressed my palms into the table. “We’re winning. I’m taking this team to the Super Bowl. I don’t have time to get wrapped up in some girl. As long as I’m out of the press who cares? I’m not out chasing ass, so stop pointing me in that direction.” My glare was hard and nasty, but Charlie deserved it.

She proved to me that she didn’t give a shit about football. Images and smoke and mirrors—that was her game.

Linc cleared his throat. “Luke has a point. Someone like Lexi Wilde is more of a distraction than a help. A few weeks ago her fans were all over him. Luke doesn’t need that. He’s winning. He’s in the best shape of his life. Let him focus on that. Focus on football and the game. The Warriors are going to have a playoff season. That’s what everyone wants. Quiet headlines from Luke and Ws in the results column.”

Charlie whipped the laptop back in place and typed angrily. “She is staying at the Deluxe. I think we could arrange for a run-in when she’s done with the hospital unless you want to go straight there and try to see a few kids as well. That worked last time. Might as well throw in a donation at the same time. It might tip the scale even more.”

My fist slammed on the table. “I’m not going to say it again. Alexa Wilde is off limits.”

Charlie’s eyes lit. She leaned back in her seat and folded her hands together. “How long have you two been seeing each other?”

“What?”

She closed the lid to her laptop and turned her phone face down.

“I’ve been in this business a long time. I’ve seen everything: DUIs, murder, sexual assault, alcoholism, drug abuse. And people lie to me. They think I can somehow help them without the full truth. What they don’t realize is I have radar for lies. It’s the easiest thing to spot, Luke. It’s like a spotlight, beaming right on their lying heads.

“This is one of two things: you either despise Lexi Wilde, or you’re in love with her. I get this feeling you don’t despise her.” Charlie wrinkled her nose. “I just don’t think that’s it. So that leaves me with love. And love I can work with.”

Linc kicked me under the table.

If she wanted fucking shock and awe she got it. Fuck.

27

Alexa

From the window I could see the Capitol. The scaffolding wrapped the rotunda as if it was a brand new building going up in the city. It wasn’t the prettiest view. I picked up my phone to see I had a text from Luke. My stomach floated with the same kind of bubbly feeling it always did when I saw his name.

Change of plans.

I typed back.

What’s going on?

I twisted my lips waiting for his response. I didn’t like that I had been here two hours and we already had a hiccup. I knew this was going to be complicated and risky. But I had to see him.

The past two weeks in Nashville were a whirlwind. Jake had booked me on every radio show. I did morning press. I did afternoon press. I did night press. I was going to have to get my boots re-soled after all the appearances I had made.

He was sure I could get enough votes for a full sweep of the awards if I made the rounds fast and furiously in the beginning.

It was a big popularity contest. I knew that.

Helena was with me on this trip. Jake was willing to let me out of sight because I convinced him it was a good way to have a girls’ trip with a douse of charity. I promised to post our dinners and shopping trips on my social media accounts along with a slew of pictures with the kids.

He hesitated, but I think Helena was the one who wore him down in the end. He was too happy with all my nominations not to give me some wiggle room.

Don’t go to the hospital.

I stared at Luke’s response. That wasn’t possible. I had to be there. This entire trip hinged on the hospital visit.

Why not?

I tapped my boot on the floor. My car would be here in fifteen minutes. It was too late to cancel.

Charlie knows.

My stomach sank. How? I sat on the edge of the bed. I thought we had been careful. I thought we had made sure no one had seen us together. There was no way. This was ridiculous. We needed to talk about this. Not text.

Call me.

I waited for the phone. To hear the deep throaty voice that made me shiver with excitement. Two weeks apart had been agony. The only thing holding me together had been the promise of this trip and right now it felt as if it were falling apart.

I didn’t know if I could take that. I didn’t know if I had the kind of resolve I needed to power through another day without Luke.

A few minutes passed before my phone rang.

“Hey,” I answered on the first ring. “What’s going on?”

“You can’t go to the hospital.”

“I read the text. Why not?” I still wasn’t willing to cancel the visit without some kind of emergency reason.

“Because Charlie wants me to use your trip as another chance for us to be seen together. It’s supposed to be another headline for me. And I can’t get out of it.”

“What do you mean?”

Luke’s PR manager didn’t have the same hold over him as Jake had over me. Of course he could say no. He had already ended things between us in the press. He could keep up his end of the deal. We only had four more weeks to go. Once we were on the red carpet at the CYAs this would all be out in the open. I could go to his games without hiding. He could watch me perform from backstage. We could spend the holidays together. Go skiing. All those things normal couples did. It was four weeks away.

“If you don’t go to the hospital then it’s not a fucking problem, Alexa. Don’t go and we don’t have to worry about it.”

I didn’t like his tone. None of it. I narrowed my eyes. “Excuse me?”

“Cancel it and this goes away for now.”

“Why should I have to cancel a charity event? You need to tell Charlie you aren’t going to ambush my appearance. We have an agreement.” I tossed that on the end, but I realized it was a mistake.

“Do you think I’m trying to out us? Because that’s the opposite of what I’m trying to do. Why are you being so stubborn? Don’t go to the hospital.”

“You shouldn’t go to the hospital.”

He groaned into the phone. “If you go, I have to go. If you don’t then there is no story. This is on you, Alexa.”

“It is not. This is my job. Do you have any idea how many children are waiting to see me? Can you imagine their expressions or how their hearts are going to feel if they find out I canceled? And why would I? There’s no good reason for it.”

“The reason is to protect your precious image.”

“Precious? Are you mocking it?”

“Shit. Stop picking a fight with me. You don’t know what I’ve dealt with today. You have no idea what I’ve tried to do for you.”

“You’re right. I don’t. But I thought I came here to see my boyfriend and do some charity work. Maybe I’ll only do one of those.”

He huffed. “You’re serious? You’re that mad?”

I didn’t know what I was. Everything was crumbling and crashing around me like shards of shattered glass at my feet. Why was Luke doing this—making me choose between sick children and my relationship with him. Why was he arguing? Why didn’t he just take care of it?

“Maybe I am.” But I wasn’t. I wanted to see him. I had craved another look into his eyes since he was in Nashville. I’d been waiting for his lips. Desperate for his hands.

I didn’t like being backed in a corner and neither did he.

“Fuck, Alexa. You aren’t making this easy.”

“Anything else?” I sassed. “Because I’m leaving for the hospital and it’s not the kind of thing I can be late for.”

“No.”

He hung up and I stared at a dark phone. What in the hell had I just done? I fell back on the bed, letting my hair fan out around me. My eyes floated to the ceiling. I was supposed to be at the hospital soon singing and signing autographs. Those kids depended on me. Their parents counted on me to give them joy. To bring them hope and kindness.

I wiped the first and last tear that rolled from the corner of my eye and sat forward.

Luke and I didn’t fight. This felt like my heart had been bruised and pummeled. I almost couldn’t breathe. What if he walked away? What if I wasn’t worth fighting through the fight?

I walked to the bathroom to fix my makeup. Helena would be annoyed if she saw I had ruined her artwork. I’d given her more leeway with Jake in another state. My skirt was short too. I felt liberated finally wearing what I wanted.

I needed to burn through the minutes I had before the driver arrived. I wasn’t ready to see anyone. I wasn’t in any condition to cheer up children. I had to get my shit together. The realization hit me like a punch—I might be spending my nights alone from now on.

28

Luke

I hailed a taxi outside the team’s hotel. I was mad enough to kick down a door, but I wasn’t going to do that in DC. I gave him the address for the Deluxe and sat back as the driver turned every corner in this damn city. Why in the fuck were all the streets one-way?

I paid the guy and took the elevator to the top floor. This alone was a risk, but it was better than the one Alexa was willing to take.

I banged on the door.

“Helena, I’m not—”

Her crystal blue eyes locked on mine when she whipped the door open.

“What are you doing here?”

I barged past her. “We have to talk.”

“I’m going to be late to my car.” She picked up her guitar case.

I stood between her and the door. “I have to tell you something.”

I never wanted this to come out. With everything that had happened between Alexa and me it was the last thing I wanted her to know, but fucking Charlie had forced my hand.

“Can we do this later?”

“No.” I gripped the case from her and placed the guitar on the floor. I could tell it made her mad.

“Luke, let me out of here.”

I’d never done this. Any of it. Never cared. Never bothered to try it. I didn’t have to. But Alexa brought something out in me I didn’t know I liked. And because of it I had jumped in a damn cab and raced to get to her before she did something she’d regret.

“I am going to that hospital today.”

“So am I,” she countered.

“Listen. Charlie has something on me,” I admitted.

“What is it?”

“The press. All the plans to clean up my image—involving you—it’s because a girl accused me of getting her pregnant.”

I saw the instant hurt in her eyes. The betrayal. The disbelief.

“Wh-what?”

“It’s not true. None of it. I’ve never even met the girl, but it doesn’t matter. I’m going through image rehab with Charlie. And she knows about us. She knows how I feel about you. Why I’ve been so damn adamant you stay out of this.”

“Wait, she?”

I shook my head. “Yeah, Charlie’s a she. I didn’t tell you that part?”

“You never mentioned that.”

“Not the point right now. The point is she wants you to fix my problem. She knows your schedule. She knows you’re going to the hospital. If I don’t go she’s going to tell management I’m not cooperating.”

“This is too much. Another girl? Pregnant?”

“God, no. She’s not. I’ve never met her.” I ran my hands through my hair in frustration. “The only girl I’ve had that happen with is you, Alexa. I swear. You’re the only one.”

I wanted to take a step toward her, but her expression told me to hold off.

“Why didn’t you tell me before?”

“What was there to tell? Some girl made up a story about me?”

“You could have told me the real reason for the PR problem from the beginning. You could have mentioned Charlie was a woman. How much have you been holding back from me, Luke? Is there more?”

“That’s it. It’s out. You know all of it. The rest you can read online. My sins are public. And that is the truth.”

She turned from me. I looked down at her boots. She wore those things everywhere.

“I don’t know what to say right now.”

“Fuck. Neither do I. Can’t you reschedule? Go tomorrow during the game.”

“What?”

I nodded. It was the only thing that would work. I should have thought of it sooner.

“Yes. You go during the game. There’s no way Charlie can expect me to be at the hospital. And if you were really here to see me you’d never miss the game.”

“But I don’t want to miss the game. I want to see you. It’s supposed to be my first time to watch you play in person.”

There was some kind of primal instinct that kicked into my chest. The same one that made me want to shield her from hurt. The same one that told me I should beat the hell out of Jake. The one that told me she felt I was as much hers as she was mine.

“Hey, this is more important.”

I tipped her chin upward. I risked touching her.

“I’m sorry for what I said on the phone,” she whispered.

I brushed my thumb over her bottom lip. She wore more makeup than I was used to seeing her wear.

“I was an ass too.”

She kissed the pad on my thumb and sighed. “I missed you. I don’t want to be mad.”

“I don’t think this trip is turning out to be what we thought. I’m not going to be able to stay here tonight or tomorrow. You realize that.”

“What are we going to do?”

“First, call and say you need to see the kids tomorrow. Today isn’t going to work.”

“Ok.” She pulled out her phone and I waited while she changed the arrangements at the hospital.

She laid the phone down. “That’s done. They are expecting me tomorrow.”

“Good. I’ll head over there now and Charlie will get all the feel-good photo ops she wants—just not with you.”

“That’s too bad.” I saw the sadness in those baby blues. “I liked it when we did that together. You were cute with the kids.”

“I’ll have to be cute without you.” I tapped her nose. Damn, I had turned into one of those QBs—the kind who lived for kids’ camps and created their own foundations. What had Lexi done to me?

“Then there’s just one thing to do before I leave.”

Her eyes lifted. “Please tell me it’s the same thing I want.”

I pulled her into my arms. Her body fell into mine, melting into me with a softness and tenderness I didn’t know I desired before I met her. That was the thing about Alexa. Every time I was with her I learned there were things about me I didn’t know. Places under my soul that had never been touched. Emotions I’d never even bothered with before her. But with her they were being cleaned off and used for the first time.

And that didn’t cover what she did to my body. My cock had never wanted another woman like this. I was already hard as steel thinking about my next few minutes with her.

“I’ve had this fantasy.” My fingers grazed over her breasts. Her nipples perked under my touch.

“What is it?” she asked.

“That I strip you down to nothing but those boots.” I yanked the shirt over her head.

“And?” she whispered.

I unclasped her bra and tossed it on the bed. Damn, her tits were fucking incredible. I didn’t want to rush through it, but I didn’t have much time.

“And I lick and suck you until you come in my mouth.”

She nodded. “And?” Her voice was quieter yet.

“And then I fuck you.” I stared into her eyes. My fingers curled under the band of her skirt and I shoved it past her thighs. She stepped out of it.

I walked her over to the king-size bed, pushing her back on the white sheets. She looked like an angel. Like the image of purity and sweetness. The good girl I had fucked until she was dirty and wild.

“These won’t go over the boots.” Her fingers trailed over the lace panties. And a damn temptress. My temptress.

“I’ll take care of that.” With a quick snatch they were ripped on the sides and opened for me.

I ran the palm of my hand over her heat. I lifted one boot and then the other over my shoulders before I dove between her legs, kissing and sucking with fervent pleasure. I lapped between her folds. Flicked over her swollen clit. Pushed my tongue inside her sweet soaked pussy before her hips bucked, betraying her body’s quick reach to climax. Fuck, she was ready for this.

The leather heels bounced on my shoulders.

“Ohh, God,” she moaned, gripping at the bed, clinging for something.

But I pried wider. Pushed harder. Sucked deeper. Until she was gone. Until we were both mindless. I slowly licked over her clit watching her vibrate under my stare.

I unbuckled my belt and popped the snap on my jeans before freeing my cock.

Her hands released the sheets and I saw the sleepy look of satisfaction on her face.

I didn’t let her revel in it long before I thrust inside her heated moaning pussy.

“Fuck, Alexa.” She felt tighter than she ever had. It was the angle. Her legs in the air. My cock bigger than it ever was.

I pumped steadily knowing I was close to the edge. I had to pull out fast before I filled her to the brim with my cum. I drove inside her, kissing her knee just above the leather on her boot.

“Oh shit,” I groaned. My belly clenched as I jerked my cock and let my release pool on her stomach.

“You don’t have to do that anymore.” She sat up to kiss me. “I swear I’ve been good about my birth control.”

I kissed her roughly. “You should have told me before.”

“Round two?” she teased.

I pulled my jeans up and fastened them. “No, I’ve got to get out of here.”

“Wait.” She sat up quickly, wrapping her arms around my neck. “I don’t want you to go. I’m not ready. It’s been two weeks. This isn’t enough time.”

I hung my head. There wasn’t a fucking thing I could do about it. I wasn’t going to dwell on it. There was no point.

“Baby, don’t make this harder on yourself.” I pulled her hands from my neck.

“Don’t you want to stay?”

I clasped the buckle into place. “Of course I want to stay. But I have a game tomorrow. I can’t stay up all night. And Charlie is on to this.” I pointed between us. “This is my way of keeping our deal until the red carpet.”

She pouted. And it was the prettiest damn pout I’d ever seen. God, I wanted those lips. To kiss them. To fuck them. She was killing me. I knew she’d let me come down her throat. I closed my eyes.

“I’ll text you later.” I tried to walk to the door, but her naked body clung to me.

“No, don’t go yet. A few more minutes. Take a shower with me? At least help me clean off.”

I looked at her glistening belly. I had done that.

I yanked the shirt over my head. “Ten-minute shower and then I’m out of here.”

She smiled victoriously. “Wait until you see this shower.”

I laughed. I think we both knew no one in this room gave a shit about what the shower looked like. Once we were in it we wouldn’t even see it.

29

Alexa

The water cascaded on my shoulders. Luke lathered the green tea body wash on my back. I leaned into him, feeling the warmth of his skin and the slickness of the water between us. His hands coasted up to my nipples, pinching and twisting them with dabs of bubbles.

“Feels good,” I moaned. I hope he hadn’t set a timer. We were already way past his ten-minute curfew.

I knew he couldn’t stay. And his intentions were good. He was trying to spare me the fall out I didn’t want before we had a winning plan in place. For that I loved him. My eyes sparked and my belly flipped. Was I thinking this was love? Was it?

Had I actually fallen in love with Luke Canton? The edge of him was sharper than any blade I had been near. The man had sliced under my skin, freeing me. Yet, I wanted more. I knew that. He knew it. We had risked everything to be together. Did that define love? Was he in love with me too? My consuming crush had re-ordered everything in my life. Nothing could stop me from needing the rush he gave me. Needing the place he created where I could soar. He was my love song.

I didn’t care if the song was blurry or rough. That it wasn’t like everyone else’s song. This was the one we wrote together.

I spun to face him.

“What?” he asked.

“I-I was just thinking.” I wanted to tell him. To confess how he had inexplicably changed my life.

New lyrics popped in my head. The words that would tell the world he was mine. I thought about jumping out of the shower and jotting them down in my journal, but Luke leaned down to kiss me. The song could wait.

“I’ve got to get going.” He reached around me to turn off the water.

“Wait.” I stopped him.

I eyed him as I sank to my knees. The water soaked my hair and slid down my back. The steam billowed around me. We both liked our showers hot.

His stare became hungry and dark. I was nose-level to his rod of a shaft. I’d dreamed about this moment. Fantasized about giving him this kind of satisfaction. How he would look at me when I took him in my mouth. How he would sound. How his body would react to my control. I was going to give him the best blow job of his life. At least I was going to try to.

His hand reached for the back of my head. My lips parted. He let me take a second to taste the tip of saltiness, swirling it in my mouth. But it was only a second before his need for me, took over. He thrust between my lips with sudden intensity and I sucked hard against his cock, tilting my head to take him all in at once.

In and out, his silky skin slid creating delicious friction. My hands pressed and tugged at his balls, forcing him to growl and hiss. He jerked violently forward and I smiled. His hips rocked with forceful rhythm.

“Fuck, Alexa. Fuck.”

His fingers laced through my hair, pressing himself deep in my throat when I felt him clench and convulse in my mouth. I tried not to gag as the cum filled my throat and made its way to my stomach. I sucked again.

He pulled out as his back slammed against the wall.

“Oh shit. Shit.” He huffed, trying to catch his breath.

I licked my lips. “Was that ok?”

“I’m not staying any longer.” He eyed me seriously.

I pressed my cheek to his chest. I could hear his heart firing rapidly.

“I know. I just wanted you to have something to remember.”

He laughed. “Yeah, I think I’ll fucking remember.”

***

Helena sat next to me on the fluffy hotel bed. We had ordered an entire tray of room service desserts. We were both exhausted from our shopping excursion. Half of the silver trays had been picked through.

As promised, we had posted pictures and videos as we made our way through DC. I posed with fans and signed a few autographs. I’d managed to find a few things I thought Luke would like too. Helena bought them for me, explaining to the cashiers that her brothers loved sunglasses and vintage T-shirts.

My boots rested in the corner of the closet. I didn’t think I would ever look at them the same way again after I had seen them bounce over Luke’s bulging shoulders. I hadn’t decided, but his shoulders might be my favorite part of his body. They were strong and wide. I loved running my fingers over them, feeling the contact of his rigid muscles underneath my touch. I sighed.

“What is it?” Helena stabbed the double espresso chocolate cake with a fork.

I smiled. “Nothing.”

“You have it so, so bad.”

“I do. I really do. And I’m not sorry.”

“You shouldn’t be. I’m glad you’re doing something for yourself.”

I opened another lid and attacked a raspberry torte. “I run a multi-million-dollar company. I have a new athletic line that I’m getting ready to launch. My footwear brand is doing almost twice the numbers that were projected. I’ve been nominated for every possible CYA category I could.” I took a bite. “If I can do all that. I can be with Luke.”

I don’t know when I had traveled so far into the shadows that I had forgotten who I was. It took determination and unrelenting drive to make it to the top. I was the girl who had worked her ass off to get there. Jake had somehow pushed me out of the way of my own success. I had to own that. I let him do that to me. I stepped to the side while he started to take possession of what were my victories. That wasn’t going to happen anymore.

“Hell yeah, you can.” Helena grinned.

We both jumped when my phone buzzed.

“Is it Jake or Luke?” she asked.

My lovesick grin gave it away.

“Ok, I’m going back to my room so you can talk to him, but I’m taking the rest of this cake.” She plucked the platter from the cart and walked out.

I touched the video button to see Luke’s face.

“Hey.”

“Hey, gorgeous.”

“How did it go at the hospital?” I asked.

His room looked simple. It wasn’t nearly as elegant as the suite I had reserved.

“Took one of the other guys with me. Kids seemed to like it.”

“You did?” I didn’t mean to sound as stunned as I was.

“Yeah. Rookie guy named James. Thought it would be good for him too.”

“Wow. Now you are recruiting and mentoring. I like it.”

“Hey, don’t get carried away. I’m going to have to go close down a bar tonight to right the scales here. People are going to get the wrong idea about me.”

I twisted my lips together. These were the moments when I saw him lower the shield that barricaded him from the rest of the world. It made me melt.

“Don’t do that,” I warned playfully. “And Charlie? What did she say?”

He scratched the back of his head and leaned back on the bed. I wanted to be with him so badly. I wanted to fall asleep and wake up in his arms. We were in the same city, but separated because of my choices.

“Yeah, she’s pissed. Madder than a fucking hornet, actually.”

I giggled. “Sorry, not funny.”

“I did what I said I would do. I made the kids smile,” he grumbled.

“And you loved it. Admit it.”

He scowled. “I’ll admit it when we’re alone.”

“Alone?”

He nodded. “Next time you’re on your knees I’ll gladly admit it.”

I turned completely red. I could see it on the tiny screen inset on the video call. “Luke!”

“Give me another blow job like that and I’ll admit anything you want.” He winked.

I wanted to pretend I was embarrassed, but I wasn’t. I was doing a double cartwheel in my head. I had given Luke exactly what I wanted to give him and he loved it. My skills were improving. My boldness was growing. My sexuality was blossoming like an out-of-control wildflower.

“Gladly,” I agreed in an instant.

“Damn it, Alexa. You’re killing me. Think anyone would notice if I showed up at the Deluxe twice in one day?”

“Depends on what time you’re planning on leaving.” God, there was nothing I wanted more.

He shook his head. “I wish I could. It’s too big of a risk.”

“You’re right,” I answered quietly.

“Get some sleep,” he ordered. “I’ve got an early day with press and pre-game. I can’t stay up all night talking to pretty girls.”

“All right. Good night, Luke.”

“Night.”

I reluctantly hung up and stared at the TV. I had flipped to Sports Now to listen to the speculation about the game tomorrow. I wanted to learn as much as I could about the AFA and what was the single most important thing in Luke’s world.

I turned up the volume when I saw Luke’s face appear on the screen. They showed scenes of his appearance at the hospital today. Instead of talking about the showdown with the Sharks, the only thing the anchors wanted to discuss was the new Luke Canton.

I grinned, settling into a stack of pillows. I could listen to them talk about this version of Luke all night. I don’t know when I fell asleep, but the last thing I saw was Luke sitting next to a little boy. And I couldn’t help but think of what an amazing dad he was going to be one day.

30

Luke

Three Weeks Later

I couldn’t believe I was looking at fucking tuxedo pictures when I should have been looking at the playbook. We had a bye this week. So the timing was perfect for me to fly to Nashville for the CYAs.

But tuxes? I hated the fuckers.

“Just pick one. That’s all you have to do.” Alexa chimed in. We video chatted every night.

“Why don’t you just pick it.”

“Because, Helena narrowed it down to three. Don’t you like any of them?”

I scowled. “No.”

“Come on, Luke. Just one?”

I scanned my options. “Last one on the left.”

She smiled. “See? That wasn’t so bad.”

“You don’t have to wear it.”

“Have you seen my dress?”

That caught my attention. “No. But it better be tight and you know I love to see your tits.”

“I’ll work on that.” She played with her bottom lip.

“Did you take the test yet?” I blurted it out like a damn idiot. She may have taught me a lot, but I didn’t have a filter.

“How did you go from red carpet wardrobe to pregnancy test?” she asked.

“I want to know, Alexa. I want to know about our baby.”

It was eating me up. Every time I thought I forgot about it, I hadn’t. One of the guys would bring his sons to practice and everyone would get a kick out of tossing him the ball. It hit me in the fucking gut every time. That could be my kid. I could be doing that.

She held up a box and showed me the test on the screen. “I have it. I just don’t think I can do it without you.”

“Put the phone down and I’ll wait.”

“Luke!”

“Was that insensitive?”

“Yes.” She glared at me. “I need you here for this. It’s a huge deal.”

“You want to wait another week?”

“It’s five days. Five more days and we’ll know for sure.”

I turned off the light in my office and carried the phone down the hall with me. “Think it could be a boy?”

Her eyes widened. “You really want this, don’t you?”

Fuck. I didn’t know what I wanted. Only, that when I was with her, I wanted my baby inside her. Hell yeah, I wanted it.

“You’re going to have my baby, Alexa.”

There was silence on her end, but she wasn’t mad. She was stunned. Quiet. Almost crying.

“Why are you so damned far away?” she whimpered.

“Not much longer. Five days, right?”

“Right.” She smiled. “In five days we’ll be out. We don’t have to hide. We’ll take this stupid test. Our worlds are going to be completely different.”

“And Jake knows about everything? He has a plan?” I didn’t give a shit about that fucker, but he was the reason Alexa had to hold off on making this public.

“I’m taking care of Jake. Ok?”

I walked into my bedroom and closed the door. My house wasn’t nearly as large as Alexa’s. She could walk circles in that place.

“Charlie is basically doing somersaults. It’s like she won some kind of publicity lottery. We are officially off her shit list for the stunt we pulled in DC.”

The only way to deal with Alexa’s red carpet invitation was to include Charlie. Alexa was reluctant at first, but after a few calls they seemed to hit it off. I was still trying to wrap my head around how two women could be so different and work together like they did. Alexa swore Charlie was nowhere near as bad as Jake. She was a smart calculated businesswoman with marketing strategy in her DNA.

“I’m getting in bed. So I’ll talk to you in the morning.”

She puckered her lips together. “Good night.”

“Night, baby.”

I hung up and plugged the phone in the charger.

In five days things were going to implode. There was no fucking way around it. But I had trusted Alexa that this was the way she needed to do it. I wasn’t used to someone else calling the shots. Not Linc. Not Charlie. Sure as hell not a woman in my life.

But it didn’t feel like a prison with Alexa. It felt right. And that scared the absolute shit out of me.

31

Alexa

I paced in front of the pool. Jake always liked sitting out here. I even had lunch catered. I needed every brownie point I could get before we had this conversation.

I arranged the linen napkins again. It had to be perfect. From the sunflowers to the croissants. I couldn’t settle for a wilted petal or a crumb on the tablecloth.

Early November was gorgeous in Tennessee. The leaves rustled around me. From the corner of my eye I caught a few deep orange ones floating to the ground.

I pulled the ankle-length wrap to my chest for comfort. I don’t know what I thought I would find. He was going to be furious. There was nothing here to save me. Nowhere to hide once I told him the truth.

“There you are.” Jake strolled onto the patio.

“Hi.” I leaned in when he kissed my cheek.

“Look at this spread.” He plucked a grape from the fruit tray and popped it in his mouth. I thought maybe it was the pool, but his eyes looked bluer than usual today.

“Let’s sit and eat,” I suggested.

Jake pulled the chair out for me and I scooted into the cushioned seat.

“Gorgeous day.” He mused at the scenery.

“It is.” I pulled a bottle of chilled cider from the bucket. Jake never drank during the day. He said it gave him too much of a buzz.

I offered him a glass before filling my own.

“Remember when I first found this house?” I asked.

He smiled. “I think I found it for you.”

“Ok, remember when you found this house?”

He nodded. “Two years ago?”

“Yes. It was.”

I was headed somewhere. I just didn’t know if I could take Jake with me. I didn’t know if he was capable anymore of being the friend I used to have. But ever since the CYA nominations, it was as if a part of that man had re-emerged. The part that had drawn me to him.

He laughed. “I think we ordered pizza and ate in one of your dining rooms on the floor.”

“And the power went out on us because I forgot to call the power company.”

He chuckled. “Who buys a million-dollar house and forgets to turn the power on?” His eyes sparkled.

“I guess that would be me.” I giggled.

We had bought sleeping bags and crashed in a guestroom together. The furniture delivery was still a week off from when I closed on the house, but Jake and I were so excited about it we didn’t wait for furniture. We didn’t care there wasn’t a dining room set or any beds.

“So much has happened since then.” I turned to look at him.

“Yep. I’m having lunch with country’s reigning country music queen.”

“Oh, you’ve elevated me from princess to queen? I had no idea.”

“After where you started, I’ll give you the title.”

And that’s when my stomach clutched. The sick twisted game Jake played was between us.

“We’ve been so busy I feel like I have no idea what’s going on in your life. Tell me what’s going on,” I pried. I had to stay on track with my idea. My life with Luke depended on this.

“The usual. I’ve been running my ass off booking you for the awards. We’re so close.”

“I don’t mean work.” I smiled shyly. “You. Tell me what you’re doing. Are you seeing anyone?”

He shifted uncomfortably. “What are you getting at, Lex?”

“Nothing.” I shrugged. “We used to be close. We used to tell each other everything. I miss that.”

“You do?”

“I think we would work better together again if we were friends, Jake. I don’t like the animosity. It’s wearing me down. It’s got to be getting to you too.”

He picked at the chicken salad. “Where is this going? I know you don’t care about my personal life.”

“Do you care about mine? Not because of work, but because you used to be my friend?”

He rubbed his smooth jaw. “I’m always going to care.”

It wasn’t the warm and fuzzies I was going for, but it was all I had. Jake would only let me push him so far.

“I need to tell you something as a friend. Not as my manager, but as my friend, Jake. The guy who knew me back when. The man who thought he could make me a star. The one who rented a car with me and drove me from gig to gig because I didn’t have any money to buy anything on my own. That’s the guy I want to talk to right now.”

“What is this?”

I put my hand over his. “I’m with Luke Canton. I’ve invited him to walk the red carpet at the CYAs with me and he said yes.”

I waited for the detonation to take its effect.

The icy glaze covered his eyes and he huffed. “Why, babe? Why would you do this?”

“Because I’m in love with him, Jake. I deserve to be happy and Luke makes me happy. I want you to be ok with this. I want you to see what I see. I want you to be happy for me.”

He laughed so loudly a nearby bird ruffled his wings and flew over the pool. “Happy for you? You are talking career suicide and you want me to be happy?”

I shook my head. “The CYAs are only two days away. I promise you it’s going to be great. Luke is going to look amazing and the press is going to love him. He’ll do as much or as little as you want.” I leaned toward him. “Give him a chance, Jake. I swear you’re going to see a different side of him and the fans are going to love this.”

He pushed back from the table. “I warned you, Lex. I told you if you continued down this path I would reveal the truth.”

I looked at him with utter disbelief. “You won’t do that. It would destroy your career too. Stop bluffing and let’s talk through this like professionals. Luke Canton is my boyfriend and as my manager you have to work him into my career.”

I stood facing him with a new confidence. I felt as if I were suddenly channeling some part of Luke. This is exactly what he would want me to say. I had to stand up for myself. For him. For us.

“Prepare yourself. I am going to unleash all the secrets you have, babe,” he hissed at me.

“You wouldn’t. Stop with the idle threats.”

He pointed his finger at me. “It’s not idle. I have several top reporters on speed dial. There’s plenty of time between your big country house to my penthouse in the city to make those calls.”

“Then I’ll tell them about you,” I threatened. I was flush with anger. Raging mad. Desperate to stop him.

He spun on his expensive shoes. “You have no proof.”

“I need proof to tell everyone you’re gay?” I huffed.

“Yeah, you do. And it’s just going to be the ramblings of a ruined girl, trying to save her ass versus a well-established manager. No one is going to believe you, Lex.”

“It will ruin you. You can’t be gay in Nashville,” I sputtered. “No one will work with you.”

He began to walk through the house, but I was on his heels. “No proof. As a matter of fact, I’m offended you’re even saying this to me.”

“I know you’re gay. You told me. We’ve talked about it. I cried with you in your rundown apartment. You were afraid to come out to your parents. You couldn’t tell your friends. You couldn’t even tell the man you were in love with.”

His face seized in agony. “Shut up, Lex. You don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m going to take my chances.”

“And risk the judgment? If there’s one thing I know about you, it’s that all you care about are appearances. You’ll die if I tell.”

He was at the front door. “And if there is something I know about you, it’s that you’re too weak to do what has to be done. You would never sell me out like that. Because as sad as it is, you still care about those memories. They mean something to you. Somewhere in that pretty little head of yours you think I’m still that guy from seven years ago. The one who met you because he had to take a girl to a country music event. You think a sliver of that guy exists. And you know what? He doesn’t. He’s gone, babe.

And what’s left is your soft heart. Your box of memories. And a girl who doesn’t have the guts to save herself.”

He closed the door. I closed my eyes. Everything he said was true.

32

Luke

My phone started ringing as I drove home from practice. Bye weeks usually gave me extra time in the film room. I had spent the past four hours watching the Wranglers. I was tired. My eyes burned. My shoulders ached. I was ready to get home and drink a cold beer.

I pressed the button on the steering well.

“What’s going on, Linc?”

“Have you heard the news? Where are you?”

“What news? I was in the film room all day. I can barely see straight.”

I heard him sigh. “Listen, I’m with Charlie. I think I should put her on.”

“Charlie? What the fuck are you doing with her?”

I groaned. If my brother was fucking the hot PR specialist, I was going to kick his ass. That was the last thing we needed. I should have seen it coming. It was written all over his face every time he saw her.

I heard her smooth voice on the phone before I could snap at my brother again. “Hi, Luke. It’s Charlie.”

“Yeah. Linc says there is something you need to talk to me about.”

I gripped the steering wheel thinking of all the ways I was going to lay into my big brother. What the hell was he thinking getting involved with her? Yeah, she had a nice little ass, and she was pretty. But she was trouble. And she’d done nothing but bust my balls since the minute we met. I didn’t like she was in McCade’s pocket. This was fucked up.

“It sounds like you might be driving.” Her voice was crisp as usual.

“On my way back from practice and film day.”

“Maybe you should call us back when you’re at your house.”

This was total bullshit. Now she was calling them an “us.”

“I can talk now.”

“All right. There is a story that just broke. I thought I should ask you if Alexa talked to you about it beforehand, because I would have appreciated a heads up.”

“What are you talking about, Charlie? I’ve told you everything Alexa and I have planned for the red carpet. I’m not keeping shit from you.”

I was tired of her riding my ass. I’d been transparent with her since the DC fuckup. Alexa and I had brought her in on everything so that she could use the awards show as a launching point for our relationship story.

The only thing I hadn’t brought up was the possible pregnancy, but that wasn’t any of her damn business. Alexa was stressed out about it enough. Her schedule wasn’t regular. She didn’t keep track of it and her birth control was all over the place. The only way we were going to know was when she took that test together.

“Then you don’t know about Mandy Brown?”

“Who the hell is Mandy Brown?”

Charlie exhaled. “We have a problem, Luke.”

“Spit it out.” I was on the verge of calling her the same names I used on the field for some of the guys. I was close.

“Mandy Brown is Lexi Wilde. Before she was a country star apparently she was an escort in Nashville.”

I almost missed the turn for the ranch. I thought I heard what Charlie said, but it didn’t register.

“Luke?”

“Yeah. What did you say?”

“Lexi used to work for an escort service as Mandy Brown. I don’t have all the details, but I’m going to have to advise you right now that we have no choice but to call off the red carpet appearance. You can’t be seen with a former hooker.”

“Hooker? Escort?” She wasn’t talking about my Alexa. “Some loser is probably trying to extort money from her. This has happened to me.”

I was angry enough to split the steering wheel in half. The rage pumped through me in jolts of adrenaline. Someone was going to pay for this. Ruining my reputation was one thing. Someone trying to take Alexa down was something else.

I pulled into the garage. I needed to get Alexa on the phone.

Charlie kept rambling. She was in def-con five mode. “I’m not prepared to reorganize our plan until I see how the optics fall out. It would help if I could talk to Alexa. For now, please don’t leave Austin, Luke.”

I ignored her. There was no way she could keep me here if Alexa needed me in Nashville.

“I’ve got to go, Charlie. Tell Linc I’ll call him later.” I hung up before she had a chance to shove another recommendation down my throat.

I dialed Alexa’s number.

“Baby, you ok?”

She choked out a sob. “Luke.”

“Hey, what the hell is going on? Are you ok? Talk to me.”

We were all in on this thing. She knew she could trust me with her life. I always had her back. I’d do whatever it took to take care of her, especially with fucking vultures coming after her like this.

Her life had been anything but easy. She had gone through hell with her parents. She had survived so much on her won. They weren’t here for her now, but I could be. I could be that man in her life. I was strong enough for both of us if she needed me to be. I’d fight like hell for this woman. Nothing could stop me. My emotions ran deep and wide.

And it hit me like a fucking brick to the back of the head. I loved her.

I loved Alexa Wilde. It was fierce and overpowering. The kind of love that was brutal. I had held her closer and tighter than any woman. I had memorized every delicious morsel of her body. I missed her when she wasn’t near me. I listened to her damn music in my truck. I knew the words to her songs. I knew the songs she hadn’t recorded yet. I wore the damn sunglasses she had shipped to me. I kept pictures of her on my phone. I was fucking in love with her. Damn it.

I heard her suck in a breath. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know if you’d call. I didn’t think you’d want to talk to me.”

“I can handle this. Shit, Alexa. I’ve been accused of worse.” If she hadn’t met me at a charity event I wondered if she would have taken the chance she did. Did that one sliver of good she saw in me lead us here? This was my territory. I knew how to roll with the punches of bad press. I could get her through this fuckup.

“It’s mostly true.”

It was as if someone had jammed a blade between my ribs. What did she say? No. It wasn’t true. No fucking way was it true.

“It’s true?” I sat in the cab of my truck, dumbfounded. Shocked. Broken.

I didn’t know how quickly my emotions could be strangled with one confession.

She sniffed. “Jake said he was going to release the information, but I didn’t believe him. I never thought he’d actually go through with it. He’s been saying it for years.” She cried so hard, none of her words made any sense.

“You used to be Mandy Brown?” I didn’t even know who the fuck that was.

“Yes, but let me explain—”

I cut her off.

“Stop it. It’s a fucking lie.” I couldn’t let her destroy me. The longer I hung around to hear excuses, the longer my heart was still in it. The more I bled. The more I physically reacted to the words in my ear.

“Luke, I wanted to tell you all of this before, but there was never a right time to tell you.”

My stomach clenched in repulsion.

I didn’t need an explanation. I had been played. I was no different than the fans. The millions of people who fell in love with an image.

I thought she was someone different. The woman who had brought something deep and powerful from my soul. She could move me with her voice. Rock me with her body. Love me with her heart. And the entire time she was a whore. A whore.

My eyes narrowed. My heart hardened.

“Luke, please talk to me.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

What could she say? What could undo the lies and deceit? What would erase the images flashing through my head of other men having her the way they wanted? Of her reaching for the bedside for piles of cash after she had been fucked. God. I cringed. I beat the steering wheel.

“You have to know I was trying to make it on my own, and the real story isn’t the one you—”

The rage consumed me. The pain tore through my veins. I hung up and hurled the phone in the back of the truck. I didn’t want to be near it if she called or texted.

I walked inside and went straight for the bottle of bourbon.

I didn’t bother to find a glass. I popped the top and touched the bottle to my lips. It had been a long time since I had spent the night drunk, but I was about to change that.

33

Alexa

“Honey, please stop checking your phone.” Helena’s voice was sympathetic.

“He hasn’t called or returned any of my texts.” I turned the screen facedown. “If he were coming tonight, he would have called, wouldn’t he?”

Her eyes met mine in the mirror. “I’m sorry. But you’ve got to focus on this night. Look how gorgeous you look. And this dress is to-die-for.”

I didn’t care about the dress or my hair. Without Luke, it didn’t matter.

“I think I should skip the red carpet.”

“I realize Jake isn’t your manager any more, but I have to step in on this one. You’re doing the red carpet.”

I sighed. “So I can be humiliated, publicly?”

“No, so you can show people you are not ashamed of who you are. Tell people the truth, Lex.”

I shook my head. “They’ve already made up their minds. They think I was a prostitute.”

“And you’re ok with that? You’re ok with Jake smearing your name to everyone?”

I glared. “Why didn’t he just leave on his own? Why did he have to throw me under the bus and claim breach of contract on my part? I would have let him out if he had asked.”

“Because he’s a fucking snake.”

I was done wasting my energy on Jake. I was free from him. And he had been right. I wasn’t going to run his name through the mud. It would make me just as ugly and nasty as he was if I outed him. I’d always told him I’d stand by him if he decided to live his life publicly. I’d feel like a hypocrite if suddenly I used it against him as if I didn’t support gay relationships. I had to let that go. It wasn’t going to happen.

“I wonder how long he had been courting Nicki Niles?”

She shrugged, tucking a few curls behind my ears and pinning them with crystals. It gave my hair a little bit of extra sparkle.

“Long enough to devise a diabolical plan. He signed with her yesterday. He could have at least waited until after the CYAs.”

“It doesn’t matter. He’s in pop now. And I’m staying in country. Hopefully, we’ll never see each other again.”

I had a lump in my throat. I hoped I was still in country. I wanted to be. This was my musical place. The instruments I played. The lyrics I loved. My friends, who had been noticeably absent, were in this industry.

But Jake’s plan to destroy me out of pure driven spite had already been successful. The calls had stopped. The congratulations had slowed. No one invited me to any of the after parties tonight. And the one person who mattered most—Luke—was gone.

***

I pulled my shoulders back and pressed my lips together, refreshing my lip gloss before the limo door opened. I had to walk the red carpet alone. I plastered a smile on my face. I missed Luke. So badly it hurt.

But this was on me. I should have talked to him. I should have told him the night I opened up about my family. There was so much more to the story than what I shared. But the fear that he would hate me kept me from telling him I was desperate when I first moved to Nashville.

My parents were gone. I had no college fund. I had a pocketful of waitress tips and that was it. When I saw the ad for the dating agency I answered it. It wasn’t supposed to last long. And I wasn’t a whore.

“Ready?” the driver asked.

I nodded. “They can open the door.”

He signaled to the group outside and the door opened. The flashes and screams started. I stepped onto the red carpet, hearing my name mixed with boos and cheers. Reporters screamed my name.

The representative appeared from the side. “Right this way, Miss Wilde. We’ll just keep you moving here. Yep. Just keep walking.”

I smiled and looked up at him. He guided me through a line. Instead of stopping and posing for pictures or answering questions he ushered me on the other side of the paparazzi row.

“Don’t I need to—”

“We’ll just keep moving. I don’t want you to deal with anything uncomfortable tonight.” He pulled the earpiece on his head. “Ok, looks like I can take you straight to your seat.”

“But, I wanted to say hi to some people.” I looked over my shoulder. I was the only one being whisked inside as if I were late.

“Inside works. And it’s cooler,” he offered.

I refrained from stomping my pointy heel into his toes. He was only doing what he had been told to do, but I felt it. The judgment. The pity. The problem I caused for the awards. They would much rather I tucked my tail and stayed home to watch the awards in my PJs and with a big bucket of cookies and cream ice cream.

Instead Lexi Wilde was here to collect all her CYAs in person and remind the world that country fans had fallen for a girl that underneath it all was paid to be liked.

This was when I needed a manager—someone who could navigate this mine field for me. Show me where it was clear to step. Who I should avoid. The path to safety.

There hadn’t been time. Between severing ties with Jake, losing Luke, and preparing for the show with Helena I didn’t have time to vet and interview new managers.

Before he could shuttle me inside, a microphone was shoved in my face.

“Lexi, what do you want to tell your fans about the accusations? Do you think it’s going to affect your chances tonight to take home an award?”

I turned to my guide, indicating I was going to stop whether or not he liked it.

“Hi.” I grinned sweetly. “I’m so happy for my fan support. I’ve felt so much love this week. Really, I can’t thank them enough.”

Years of working alongside Jake had prepared me for these kinds of questions.

The truth was my accounts were filled with nasty words like whore, slut, and hooker. I had been overwhelmed with venom and hate. It took everything I had to get out of bed. Helena had convinced me to stop reading the nastiness.

“And the awards?” the reporter pressed.

“Oh, I’m not even thinking about that,” I lied. “It is an honor to be nominated, and I just loving being here to celebrate country music with my friends.”

I felt a tap on my elbow and I knew I had to get inside or be carried.

“Thank you.”

I ducked inside and faced a crowd of my peers.

“I can find my own seat.” I told the representative. “Thank you.” I tried to be gracious, but he was overbearing. “Unless you want to walk with me to the ladies’ room?” I suggested.

He took the hint and walked back outside. I doubted there were any other artists here who caused the kind of image problems I did, but someone always showed up drunk, and you could count on at least one couple to have a major fight in the limo before the car door opened. It was standard award show activity.

“Olivia.”

I waved to one of the first artists I ever toured with. Olivia Jones was one of the biggest headliners when I started in the business. I hadn’t seen her since we did a holiday concert together last year. I crossed the lobby to give her a hug, but before I got to her she had already stepped inside the theater.

I bit my lip, trying to convince myself she hadn’t seen me.

But after the next three artists snubbed me, I couldn’t pretend any longer. I wasn’t welcome here.

The lights flickered and everyone squeezed through the doors to find their seats. I hesitated. If I left, no one would care. They would find a seat filler for me. Someone like Olivia would say I wasn’t able to make it to accept my award. But screw that. I was stronger than what they thought they knew about me.

I had a song to perform tonight.

I had awards to collect.

I had an image to rebuild, and I wasn’t going to start that by running away. I didn’t know if Luke was in my life anymore, but he had taught me that strength wasn’t sporadic. It wasn’t a convenience you could turn on and off. It was a part of my DNA.

The Lexi Wilde that clawed her way to the top was going to dig her boots in and stay.

34

Luke

I heard an obnoxious pounding sound coming from the foyer. I opened one eye and then another. I looked down at the empty bottle of bourbon on the floor. It was at least the third one. Fuck. My head hurt.

I heard it again. Someone was at the front door.

I pushed myself off the couch, stumbling to the door. I opened it.

Alexa was on the porch, dressed in a long beaded gown that hugged her hips and dipped between her breasts.

For a second I had forgotten that she had betrayed me. That we were no longer together. I saw her and my instinct was to pull her in my arms and kiss every inch of her skin. And then I remembered.

“What are you doing here?” I growled.

“If this is the only way I can get you to talk to me, I had to at least try.”

“I don’t want to talk.”

I stumbled back.

“Are you drunk?” Her eyes widened.

“Fuck yeah. You have a problem with that?”

“Is this my fault? Have you been drinking for two days? I called Linc and he said you had a cold. This isn’t a cold. This is stupid.”

“Go back to Nashville, Alexa.” I started to close the door in her face, but her palm slammed on my initials.

“No. You are going to hear me out, Luke.”

She busted past the loose hold I had on the double doors and marched into the living room. She was a blurry whirl of glitter and sequins. I couldn’t keep up. I was fucking drunk.

She stood in front of the fireplace. I tried to keep my focus on her, but the room spun.

“You need to get in bed.” She looked at me. “You are drunker than I thought.”

Before I knew it, she had my arm over her slender shoulder and started to push me toward the bedroom.

“You are not getting in my bed,” I threatened.

“I know,” she whispered. “But you need to sleep this off and we can talk in the morning.”

“I don’t know about that.” I shook my head.

But as soon as I saw my bed, I collapsed in a heap. I felt the tug of my jeans, but I was too exhausted to fight her. Her cool hands worked the pants off and she slid me under the covers with some effort. She returned a few minutes later with a tall glass of water and some ibuprofen.

“Take these and then I’ll let you sleep.”

I scowled at her, but tossed them on my tongue.

“Good night, Luke.” She turned off the light and closed the door.

***

The next morning the hangover wasn’t as brutal as I thought, but I was pretty sure I had dreamed Alexa had appeared on my doorstep. I walked to the bathroom to shower and brush my teeth.

When I walked into the kitchen, I realized it wasn’t a dream. There was a pot of coffee and a gorgeous blonde in my kitchen.

“Good morning.” She smiled. “How are you feeling?”

I rubbed the back of my head. “Like you aren’t supposed to be here.” I’d never tossed a woman out of my house before.

“I came to tell you my side of the story. Don’t I deserve that? I’ve given you that more than once.”

She walked toward the kitchen table with two mugs of coffee. She placed one in front of me.

“I don’t know. I’m fucking pissed right now. You lied to me.”

“I thought you would be mad.”

“I am mad.”

She closed her eyes and slid into the seat. She wasn’t going anywhere. She was as stubborn as I was. I sat across from her.

“You can be mad. But you can also listen.” She glared at me.

I felt ambushed. She had jumped me when I was down. When I was too drunk to protest. The agony of what I had been through the past two days was enough to never attempt it again. I thought I found a way to drown out the noise with bourbon and vodka. Enough to numb the pain. Enough to erase her.

But fuck. She was close enough I could smell her hair. I could reach out and touch her if I wanted. And then the jab of the knife twisted under my lowest rib and I remembered the betrayal. The fucking dishonesty that was sitting at this table too.

“I can’t.” I shook my head. “I won’t.”

“Just sit there. That’s all you have to do.” Before I knew it she started telling me the truth. The full truth. “When I moved to Nashville I told you I had nothing. Absolutely nothing.”

“Yeah, I remember the story.” I put the coffee to my mouth. The gulp cleared the last bit of haze in my head.

“So I took a job for a dating agency.” She eyed me. “A dating agency. All I did was go on dates. Two hours max with men who needed someone for a business dinner or a social setting. It was never more than that. Never.”

She pressed the last word into the air between us. “I was not a hooker. I was not an escort. I never slept with any of the men. Every date was in a public setting. I used a fake name and wore a wig because if I did make it one day I didn’t want anyone to know I had a job in a business that doesn’t necessarily have the best reputation.”

She lowered her eyes. “I swear that is what happened. That is the complete truth. I was never a prostitute or a call girl. It wasn’t the best decision I’ve made, but it wasn’t the worst either.”

“Then why haven’t you cleared your name? Told everyone the truth?”

“Because that agency is still in Nashville. And there are a lot of girls just like me. Guys too, who need the money. And it’s not a prostitution ring or a whore house, Luke. I’m not going to out them just to save myself. Jake did this because he’s an evil son of a bitch.”

“Jake?”

She nodded. “He was one of the guys I went out with. Many times actually. He always needed a date.”

“So you two were an item? Fucker. I knew it.” The idea of them together lit the rage fire again. I’d hated him from the instant we met at the gala.

“No. He’s gay, Luke. Jake is gay.”

“What the fuck?” I chugged the coffee as if there were shots of bourbon stirred in. I needed a few.

“We used to be friends. Really good friends actually. And then something happened to him. He got caught up in the fame. My fame. And the money and meeting bigger and hotter stars. It changed who he used to be. And when I wanted to change he didn’t want it. I was his golden goose as the good girl. He didn’t want me to evolve and risk what he had built. He threatened me with my secret. He’s held it against me for years.”

“What a dick. I told you he was an asshole.”

“I know you did. You were right, but I was too scared to leave. Too afraid that he would expose me.”

I clenched my fists. I didn’t know what to think. My gut told me to go beat the shit out of that guy for what he had done to Alexa. Part of me was mad she hadn’t told me the truth. And then there was the man who was so fucking far over the cliff in love with her he couldn’t push her away. There wasn’t enough booze in the world to drink her memory away. There weren’t enough days to make me forget.

“So now what? Where is he?”

She shook her head. I saw the shame in her eyes. She didn’t need me to tell her she should have trusted me with her secret. She was already in pain because of it. But I could have helped her. Fuck it. I didn’t know I valued the truth until it was something I didn’t have.

“He said I violated our contract. Had it nulled and then signed with a bigger pop artist. He’s gone.”

I couldn’t help but grin. “Good. You’re better off without that piece of shit in your life.”

“I don’t know how I feel about it yet. It was a big price to pay to be free.”

I looked into her eyes. This girl had been through hell and back. She was alone in this life. No parents. No other family.

“It cost me fans. It cost me friends.” Her lashes glistened with tears. “Did it cost me you?”

I swallowed hard. Fuck.

35

Alexa

“Luke, can you forgive me?” I looked at him desperately. “I’m sorry. So sorry I didn’t tell you. I should have been honest from the beginning. From the minute I told you about my family. That’s when I should have told you.”

His eyes were set in a hard line. I couldn’t read him. I didn’t know if he was still angry, hurt, or just done with me.

And I knew I had screwed up. But if there was one person in this world who could forgive me it was this man. The one who had held me. Who saw me beyond the lights and the smoke. I waited anxiously.

“This is the hardest fucking decision of my life.” His jaw clenched. “I want you. But you annihilated me. I’m not the kind of man who runs the same play twice just to get obliterated a second time.”

The tear slipped from my cheek. Could I blame him? Could I judge him for not wanting to get hurt again? The pain gripped and seized me. I had flown here to be heard. I told my story and now it was time to pack my sequin dress and start my life over in Tennessee. I didn’t know how I’d leave. How I’d say goodbye to him.

“I’ll go,” I volunteered. “There’s a noon flight I can make.”

I felt sick. If I started to cry now in front of him, I might not stop. I had to get to the guest room and clean up before the tears unleashed on both of us.

“Hold on. I didn’t give you my answer.” He brushed the hair from my shoulder. “I didn’t know how much you meant to me, until you were gone, Alexa. I sat here in this ranch trying everyway I knew how to get you out of my pores. And it didn’t work.”

“What?”

“You heard me.” His eyes landed on me.

“Is that a yes?” I was fighting the tears.

“I should have given you a chance to explain.” His thumb traced my cheek. “I was a dick about it.”

“It’s ok. It’s ok. It was terrible. And confusing. And I feel like my emotions have been all over the place lately.” The tears came anyway.

Luke leaned toward me, scooping me into his arms. It was the first time I’d felt like we were connected again. The heat of his body soothed me. We were going to be ok.

My tears dotted the sleeve of his T-shirt.

His eyes lit. “Emotional?” He tilted his head. “Do you think…?

I unwrapped myself from his arms and stood. “I brought it with me. It’s in the guestroom.”

I walked down the hall to the room I stayed in last night. I barely slept, worried that Luke would send me home. That he wouldn’t be able to forgive me.

I dug through the bottom of my bag and pulled out the cardboard box with the plus and minus sign on the picture.

“That’s it?” he asked.

I nodded. “Are you ready for this? You sure?”

He cupped my face. “Yes.”

“Ok. I’ll be right back.” I walked into the bathroom. I read the instructions five times. I wanted to get it right. I wanted to give Luke what he wanted.

I opened the door, leaving the stick on the counter.

“We have to wait three more minutes,” I reported.

We sat on the bed, staring into the bathroom. What was on that stick was going to change our lives.

“Go check it,” he urged.

I was almost shaking. I pushed open the door and stared at the stick. I stared at it, making sure I read the stick correctly. I held it out and walked back to Luke.

“What is it?” His face was expectant.

“Not pregnant,” I choked on the words.

“You’re not?” He took the stick from my hands. “You’re not.”

I saw the disappointment in his eyes. “I’m sorry. It was a fluke anyway, right? And we were trying not to get pregnant. So, I didn’t think you wanted a baby.”

His gaze lifted to mine. “Not want a baby? I’ve thought. I’ve prayed I got you pregnant. That the fucking broken condom was a sign that I needed to get my shit together. It happened for a reason. Because I was supposed to get you pregnant.”

“You did?” My heart pounded. “You wanted to get me pregnant?”

His hand tugged in my pajama pants. “I do. I want to knock you up so fucking bad.”

“Oh God.”

I dropped to the bed as Luke pulled me on top of him. “This is crazy,” I whispered.

He shoved my pants off my ankles. I bucked when I felt his fingers feather between my legs. He traced a circle over my clit.

“You are going to have my baby, Alexa Wilde.”

I nodded. “I am.”

He spread my legs and pushed a finger inside, curling it toward my G-spot.

“I missed the last three days,” I breathed.

“What?”

“I was so upset I forgot to take the pill.” I groaned when he pushed another finger inside me.

“So there’s a chance right now?”

I nodded.

“Fuck.” He rolled my tank top over my head, feasting on one nipple and then the other. I bucked at the pressure.

He nipped at my neck and licked my throat. His lips covered my mouth and I inhaled him. His tongue mingled with mine. We were like a raging river. The damn was broken and there was no way to contain the current raging between us.

“I’m going to fuck you so hard,” he promised.

I moaned. “Please.”

He flicked my clit, with a playful snap of his fingers before he sat backward on his knees, shedding his shirt and shoving off his pajama pants.

I sighed when I saw his throbbing cock. I ached for it. I loved the thickness. The wide veins. How it stretched my pussy so wide and tight.

“You are going to have my baby,” he growled. “This is how you make a baby.”

Just when I thought Luke had shown me how intense sex could be, he took things to a new level. He reached for a pillow, jamming it under my ass. My hips lifted in the air. His fingers massaged my clit and folds, pumping a finger inside me, before withdrawing it.

I hissed every time he took it away. I wanted something to grasp and clench. I wanted him inside me.

“Like that?’ he asked.

“No. I want more.”

His thumb pressed against my clit while his fingers thrust inside me. I groaned in ecstasy.

“Fuck, Alexa. You’re so gorgeous.” He ran his free hands to my nipples, plucking them. He reached for my hand, drawing it between my legs. “You know how hot it is when I watch you touch yourself.”

I nodded. “I like it when you watch my body. I can be free with you.”

He growled. “I’m going to watch as I pump you full, baby. My cock is going to be buried so deep inside you.”

I whimpered. My cream ran freely from my legs.

“You like it when I talk like that to you.” He touched my juices to the head of his cock and massaged it.

“I do.” I breathed. “I love it when you say how you feel. It’s like when I sing.”

“You’re getting ready to hear me do a whole lot of singing, then.” He grinned, pushing my knees wide, spreading me farther than I’d ever been spread. “Fuck, I love your pussy. Keep rubbing your clit. Don’t stop.”

“Oh God,” I cried. It was so erotic. So dirty. So much fucking fun. I’d never been this turned on. I was ready to explode the minute he slid inside me.

With my knees widened so that everything I had was exposed. The way I stroked myself. The way Luke made my arousal flow with his dirty words. He positioned his cock at my entrance and with a solid stroke slammed into me with powerful force.

“Ohh,” I whimpered. The blinding white light turned to bliss. I rocked as he thrust inside me.

This was how I loved sex with him. Our skin blazing against each other. His cock soaked by my juices. The silkiness of his shaft kissing over my clit. It was beautiful and painful and sinful in so many ways. I felt as if every nerve in my body was a live wire. A singing, floating wire hitting my skin, running through my blood, lighting my core on fire.

“Oh shit, Alexa.” He twisted my nipples, pumping in and out of me, sheathing his cock until it disappeared in my heat. “Watching you like this. God, I could come over and over. Inside you. Just like this.”

“Fuck me harder, Luke. Fuck me until you know I’m going to have your baby.”

He smiled, his eyes darting to the dark place where his body joined mine. I didn’t want it to end. I didn’t want it to stop. I wanted us to make a baby just like this.

My fingers strummed over my clit until I knew I couldn’t hold off any longer. The sensations had taken over my body. I was going to spiral and crash into him. Slam into his cock, seize it like a vise. Clamp on it and claim it.

“Yes,” he coaxed me. “Fuck me. Fuck me, Alexa.”

I jolted and jerked my hips, riding him, grinding my heat into him. And then I saw his eyes change. I saw the hunger and lust turn to something else.

He leaned forward and brushed my lips with a kiss.

“I fucking love you,” he whispered.

“Ohh,” I cried. The orgasm shattered through me. I grabbed his shoulders, giving my body to him. “I love you. I love you.”

He pulsed inside me and I knew he was fucking me with everything he had. Rooting deep inside me, planting his seed. Giving me his baby.

The orgasm spiraled through me again. I shook with pleasure knowing Luke was filling me.

I looked in his eyes. “This is the hottest fucking thing we’ve ever done,” he growled.

I smiled. “It is.”

He pushed one last time before rolling off of me. He took a deep breath, his hand landed on my belly.

“I wanted that stick to be positive,” he admitted. “Damn it.”

“I didn’t think I did until it wasn’t. I’m sorry it’s been such a roller coaster.”

“But that was fucking awesome. And until we get a positive stick, I’m fucking you like that every day.”

I giggled. “Every day?”

He kissed my shoulder. “Every damn day. Without Jake in the picture, you and I are the team now. We do what we want to do.”

I curled up next to him. “Ok.”

“And that means this team is making a baby.”

I smiled. I had never been so happy in my life. He tickled the side of my arm. “What happened last night at the award show?”

“Oh, that?”

“Yeah, that.”

“If you look in the trunk of the rental car parked in your driveway you’ll see five CYA awards.”

“No shit.”

I laughed. “Apparently, the votes were cast days before my news story broke, so it had no effect on the results.”

“Damn. I’m sorry I missed it.”

I was too, but I knew it was something I had to do alone. I had to prove to myself that I was strong enough to face my demons and my enemies. Every time I walked on stage last night I carried myself a little taller. A little stronger. I had fight in me I had to find without Luke.

“It’s ok.” I smiled at him. “I’m glad I woke up in Texas this morning.”

He cleared his throat and pushed off the bed, depositing me in a heap.

“Where are you going?” I searched for an explanation.

He stepped into his pajama pants. “I’ve got the perfect place to put those awards.”

I scrambled to follow him, trying to pick my scattered clothes off the floor as I ran after him. “What are you talking about?”

“You’re moving into the ranch.”

I stared at him. “What?”

36

Luke

It made sense. It made a hell of lot more sense than trying to start a family in two different states. And what if she was pregnant because of today? My baby wasn’t going to be a thousand miles away from me. No.

“I’m getting those CYAs and putting them in the office. I have shelf space.”

“Luke, slow down.” Alexa shuffled behind me.

I popped the lever on the trunk. She hadn’t bothered to lock the car. I saw her collection of hardware. It was fucking impressive. I reached for one of the awards. It sparkled in the sun.

“Alexa Wilde, Country Year Award Artist of the Year,” I read aloud. “These are pretty sweet.”

She shook her head. “Go back to the other part. The part about me moving to the ranch.”

Her hair was wild and her neck was pink from my unshaven scruff. My mark was all over that girl. If I didn’t live on a hundred acres in the middle of nowhere I’d be more worried someone would see she was wrapped in a sheet, holding her PJs in one hand.

“Right. That’s exactly what I said.”

I collected the trophies in my arms.

“You want me to move here? Now in the middle of this scandal?”

I slammed the trunk and walked back inside. “Are you going to have my baby?”

“Yes.” She smiled.

“Then, you are living under my roof. With me. That’s the end of it.”

Her hands flew to her hips and I laughed when the sheet fell. She tried to catch it a few seconds too late. I didn’t know what she thought she was going to protest, but I appreciated she thought it was worth a try.

“Leave it.” I eyed her.

She stood in the office as I made a row for her awards. When I was finished I pulled her into my arms.

“We are going to rewrite the headline.” I kissed her throat.

“What’s it going to say?” she asked.

“It’s going to say Country Star Marries Star Quarterback.”

Her eyes widened. “Marry?”

I nodded. I’d never wanted her as much as I did now. “You’re already mine. Might as well make it official.”

She nodded. “I am.”

I picked her up, loving how she felt against my chest. “Charlie is going to have a stroke when I tell her to figure this one out.” I chuckled.

Her hands flattened on my bicep, stroking my muscles. “Any chance she might want to take on a new client?”

I stepped over the threshold of my bedroom. “Interesting idea.” I looked at Alexa. “If she could repair my reputation, imagine what she could do for such a bad good girl.” I winked.

“I’m serious, Luke. Do you think I could hire Charlie?”

I lowered her to the bed. “I’m serious too. But let’s wait to call her. Ok?”

She folded me into her arms. “Ok. I can be bad a little while longer.”

“That’s what I wanted to hear.”

Epilogue

Luke

I heard my alarm. I rolled over to turn it off, careful not to wake Alexa. She wasn’t getting much sleep lately.

She faced me, her eyes fluttered open. “Good morning.”

“Sorry. I was trying to sneak out and not wake you.”

“It’s ok.” She tugged on my hand, drawing it to her belly. “I’m not the only one awake.” She grinned, biting her bottom lip.

My palm felt the tiny twinge hit her skin. “He’s up early.”

“He doesn’t want to miss out.”

My hand traced the gorgeous swell of her belly. Alexa was beautiful, but with my baby inside her she’d never looked more radiant. Her hair was thick and shiny. Her skin glowed. And her sexual appetite had ramped up to a whole new fucking nirvana. I couldn’t get enough of her.

She moaned when my hand dipped below her belly.

“I have a few minutes before I have to get in the shower,” I whispered.

She nodded. “Charlie isn’t going to like it if you’re late to the camp.”

I pushed my fingers between her legs. “A bunch of kids can wait for me to get to camp. I need to make sure my wife has what she needs before I go.”

“Oh God.” She fisted the pillows.

Pregnant Alexa could come at the flick of her clit. It was fucking amazing. She’d had more orgasms since she was pregnant than I knew was possible. And her tits were unbelievable. All of her. Her body was creating and growing my child. If she needed some morning attention, I could deliver that to her.

Her knees fell to the side and I smiled. She gave me her full pussy. All of it, to touch and rub. Soak in her juices. Fuck. I was hard.

She panted as the orgasm began to crest. I watched her nipples turn to hard peaks. Her clit throbbed. Her eyes sparkled.

I licked my fingers, groaning. “Fuck, baby.”

She nodded. “Yes, please.”

I chuckled as I climbed on top of her, careful of her belly and slid my cock inside her. I fucked her with gentle strokes. Pushing until she gasped and then pulling out until she cried for more.

I never thought I was the kind of man who could fuck one woman for the rest of his life. I never thought I wanted to be a father. I didn’t think I could do any of those things until I met Alexa. And now I was both. A husband and a father.

I was the kind of man who protected his wife. Who did what he had to do for his family.

“Oh yes,” she rocked her hips into me. I grinned, watching her pleasure. She was about to come again. Fucking epic.

Sometimes I thought about where my life was a year ago. I was angry. I was pissed at life. Drinking my way through practices. Fighting with my coach. Ignoring my teammates. I didn’t give a shit about anyone but myself.

And now my whole life was in my arms. Everything I wanted was this woman. This goddess. The temptress who lured me to love.

My fingers curled through hers, tangling our hands together as I felt my release begin to seize me. I bit at her lips, sucking and kissing them while I came deep inside her. She whimpered with satisfaction, gripping my cock with one squeeze after another until the pulsing subsided for both of us.

I looked in her eyes. “Good morning.”

She laughed. “Good morning.”

Alexa

Five months pregnant. I looked down at my belly and rubbed my hand over it protectively. I was having a boy. A cute little rambunctious boy that was probably going to be more like his Daddy than his Mommy. Hopefully, he could sing better than his father though.

I laughed and took a sip of tea.

Luke walked up behind me and kissed me on the neck.

“I’m going to be late to camp.”

“I tried to tell you.”

He had showered after our morning in bed. But I felt amazing. Pregnancy sex was incredible. I loved it more than any other kind of sex we had had. Having Luke’s baby had changed everything for us.

I was going to be a mother. And I was a wife. I looked at the big rock on my left hand. There was no question who I belonged to. Luke would have tattooed his name on my back if I would let him.

“I’ll be back by dinner I guess.” He filled a travel mug with coffee.

“Ok. I’m going over the new cuts for the album today.”

“That’s today? Shit.”

“It’s fine. I’ve got it.”

I had moved my headquarters to Austin. Nashville wasn’t the right fit for me anymore. Once the Mandy Brown story had broken, I had never fit in the way I had before. America’s sweetheart had crashed and burned in front of everyone.

But I still had fans, and I could still make music. Austin seemed more accepting of what I wanted to say. I moved and never looked back.

When I found out I was pregnant I had just thrown up Thanksgiving dinner. Luke and I looked at each and we knew immediately it had nothing to do with turkey and everything to do with our future.

That day I had told him the truth. The day he promised to give me a baby—was the day it had happened. I think he was upset we didn’t get to practice more, but I loved the pregnancy sex. Even when I had morning sickness it was the one thing that made me forget how terrible I felt.

But I was past all of that now. I felt healthy and strong. I had music I loved. A husband I loved even more and a baby that was going to be spoiled to death.

“I don’t want you to overdo it.” Luke looked worried.

“I’m going to listen to music. Can’t possibly overdo it.” It was cute that he wanted to watch over me. “Helena will be there too so you can text or call her.”

“Good. I’m glad she finally moved down here so I’m not the only one keeping you in line.” He pinched my ass playfully.

“She does not keep me in line,” I explained.

He leaned down and kissed my belly. “Be good while I’m gone.”

I looked up at him. “You know you’re adorable.”

“I’m not adorable. Save those words for the baby. I am a football player. The Warrior QB.” He scrunched up his face.

“Right,” I teased. “Ok fine. Have fun with the camp kids. Tell Charlie and Linc hello.”

He groaned. “Don’t get me started on them.”

“I think they’re cute together. It was like they were meant for each other or something.”

I was a fan of my brother-in-law and manager seeing each other. My husband hadn’t warmed up to the idea.

He eyed me. I took the warning.

Eventually he would see how they complimented each other. That Charlie had a way of being a softer version of herself when we weren’t at work. Sometimes she and Linc would come over for dinner. I would catch him doing the little things I loved that Luke did. Kissing her neck. Refilling her drinks. Making sure she had a blanket if we were out by the campfire. Linc was always more openly warm and loving than his younger brother, but I knew I had cracked every wall Luke Canton put up.

I had torn them down with a sledgehammer. And we built new walls together. The ones that sealed us inside a world with just the two of us and our baby. I knew when he asked me to marry him the road was going to be harder before it got easier.

Charlie had to work some kind of witchcraft to convince the Warriors to let the fallout from my scandal blow over. But she did it.

The biggest turning point came when she convinced me to do an exclusive one-time interview with Sports Now. A country star had never done anything like that before. Sports fans loved music, sure, but they weren’t my audience.

But her idea was brilliant. The Warrior fans rallied around me when they realized how quickly I had been slaughtered in the Nashville press. It made Luke instantly likeable that he stood by me. Even more that he asked me to marry him.

“Can we have them over for dinner?” I suggested. “And Helena and James?”

“Are we running some kind of match-making business on the side?” he groaned.

I looked at him from the corner of my eye. “It’s family. And friends. And if they all end up hooking up there is nothing we can do about it.” I shrugged my shoulders.

“Fuck,” he growled. “James is going to think I’ve adopted him or some shit.”

“Love you, babe.” I smiled. “I’ll get everything ready. You just show up with beer and your brother.”

“Love you too.” He snaked an arm around my waist.

I inhaled sharply. His eyes raked over my lips and I knew what was coming next. It didn’t matter that we were married. It didn’t matter he had kissed me so many times it wasn’t possible to count. All that mattered was that he stole my breath every time he did it.

His mouth covered mine and I moaned softly as his tongue slipped between my lips, curling with expert flicks.

He eyed me. “If you didn’t invite all these damn people over tonight I could take that kiss a lot further when I got home.”

I pulled his lips back to mine, clinging to his neck, begging for more. The passion rolled between us. The fire stirred under my skin.

“Fuck, Alexa,” he whispered.

I looked into his eyes, trying to steady myself. God, he made me spin. He lit every fuse I had.

“Ten minutes?” I asked.

He growled, but I knew exactly how we would spend the next ten minutes. I smiled at him as he lifted me on the kitchen counter.

He would love me until we both drowned in our fever. And when he was done and I let him walk out of my arms, I would stroll to the front window to watch him drive toward the city.

I never would have thought the first time I drove to this ranch in the middle of the night that this would be the place I would raise my family. I thought it was a bachelor pad. The home of an egotistical womanizer. And maybe back then it was. But now it was where Luke and I loved each other.

It was where he whispered dirty things in my ear that made me quiver with want. It was where we stayed up all night and binge-watched TV shows. It was where we decorated the nursery for our baby. And invited our friends to be a part of what we had built together.

It was the place where my husband could make me come one more time on the kitchen counter before he left for work. Where I could tell him I loved him. Where we made our future. The walls were filled with music and football. Sports and art. Love.

I didn’t miss Nashville. I didn’t miss the mansion with the infinity pool, or my five-car garage. This was where I was meant to be. Because every time Luke was home I knew I was with the other half of my heart.

For the next ten minutes everything else would fall away. I would be his and he would be mine.

“You drive me completely crazy, you know that?” His gaze pierced me.

I nodded. “You drive me crazier.” My chest heaved with anticipation.

“Let’s make it fifteen, Mrs. Canton.” The hunger filled his gaze and I knew I had stoked more than I realized.

I bit my bottom lip. I had it so bad for my husband. For Luke Canton. For the man who had turned my life into a perfect country love song.

###

Naughty Notes

Y’all, Luke and Alexa’s story has been with me for so long I can’t believe I’m actually finished writing their HEA. Handing characters over is not the easiest thing to do. I get used to them. They become a part of my world—I’m not kidding. I wake up wondering how Alexa would handle something. I see something I know would completely piss Luke off and it makes me laugh. This is what happens to writers. We get in deep!

But I have to let them go and give them over to you so you can fall in love just like I did. So many people helped me work through this story and pushed me when I was worried I wouldn’t be able to get it right. Because that’s what matters to me—writing something that makes the readers feel. Something fun and sexy with twists of emotions here and there. And who are we kidding … we want that super hot guy. We want Luke Canton!

I have to share this memory because it seriously shapes my love for Texas guys. One of my all-time favorite nights when I lived there included this guy I was seeing. He was an artist, loved to two-step, had his share of tattoos, played baseball, loved country music, and was broody as hell. Oh, and the longest most beautiful eyelashes I have ever seen on a guy. He was not doting or super romantic—nothing like that, but one night he led me outside with a huge pile of blankets and spread them out in the backyard. He had a few of those famous Texas beers and we hung out and watched shooting stars and drank beer. It was simple, sweet, and just one of those moments a girl doesn’t forget.

Somewhere in the back of my head I think Luke would do the same thing for Alexa.

Seriously, everyone involved in this book (you know who you are) you rock! Thank you! I couldn’t do it without my family, friends, and the super awesome readers who have supported me this year. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

###

SIDELINED

1

Sam

It was the game that popped the cherry on the season. Monday night football. The night. The one that gave millions a taste of what they had been waiting for all summer. And we were headed to Austin to play the fucking Warriors.

I got it. I knew that the schedules were arranged ahead of time. But we were Super Bowl champions. The Wranglers shouldn’t be in Austin for this game. They should have come to us. The hatred between our two teams was palpable and an overnight trip into Warrior territory was an insult to what we had accomplished.

I sat next to Stubbs on the plane. He kept his earbuds in for the twenty-minute flight from San Antonio.

I tried to stretch my legs, but even on the Wranglers’ private jet there wasn’t enough leg room. At six-five, airplanes were uncomfortable as shit. At least I wasn’t in the back with the linemen. Those guys had nowhere to go. I shifted again, banging my knee into the tray table.

“Damn it,” I muttered.

The flight attendant stepped forward in the aisle, handing out bottles of water. Coach Howell had given strict instructions that we weren’t supposed to drink the night before the game. He couldn’t regulate everything we did, but he sure as hell tried.

I wouldn’t have been surprised if he had told the flight crew to only stock water on this flight.

I smiled at the brunette as I took the bottle from her.

“Do you need anything else?” she asked.

“I think I’m good, darlin’.” I twisted off the cap and took a sip.

The season started tomorrow night and even though it was only my second year with the team, I had a strict policy once the first snap was taken. No women.

I’d made that mistake in college and it messed with my head. I didn’t broadcast it. I didn’t discuss it, but she had done a number on me and almost cost me my senior season. She could have ruined my chances in the pros. I’d never make that mistake again. I had a million-dollar contract, and no woman, no matter how great she fucked, was worth losing that.

I was the highest-rated tight end in the American Football Association. I had a Super Bowl ring and my agent had recently finalized a bonus contract for this season. I couldn’t let some pretty girl get in my head. Wasn’t happening. There was a prize for me come February worth about two million dollars.

I looked out the window as Austin came into view.

I’d spent my life playing Texas football. It was in my heart. In my blood. But this wasn’t my city. The Warriors were our biggest rivals. The fact that we were in constant competition to be crowned the state’s home team was always lingering between us.

But this time we were showing up as national champions, and they could shit talk all they wanted. They didn’t have the title we did.

The captain called over the speaker, “We are approaching Austin. Please prepare for landing.”

I exhaled. I was ready. Ready to get this game over with and take home another win.

As soon as we were on the ground and could unfasten our seatbelts, I stood up to an awkward bent position. None of us could stand in this jet. Wes, the team’s quarterback, was the first to take the steps to the tarmac.

I could hear the press outside the plane hitting him with questions. They loved that guy. He was a champion. He had led the team all the way to San Diego last year. He had earned his place.

One by one, we disembarked. The flight attendant tugged my arm before it was my turn. I looked at her as she tucked a folded piece of paper in my suit jacket.

“I’ve got a twenty-four hour layover,” she whispered.

“Thanks.” I grinned before ducking out of the jet.

“Call me, Sam.”

I ran my hands through my dark hair and shook my head.

I wasn’t going to pretend I couldn’t get any woman I wanted. I knew how they looked at me. How they licked their lips when I walked by. I worked hard for this body. I spent endless hours in the gym lifting weights and working with my cross-fit trainers. It didn’t happen overnight, but I looked like a god when I took the field. There were painful weeks and months of sweat and hard work that went into creating the physical machine I had become. I didn’t care if I was eye-candy to them—the season started tomorrow and they were background noise.

I’d throw her number away as soon as I found a trashcan. No distractions. No women. Tomorrow night the spotlight was on all of us, and I had to show the world Sam Hickson was more than a lucky first-year rookie. I was as much a champion as Wes Blakefield. I had a career ahead of me that would blow all the numbers out of the fucking world.

I smiled at the cameras and walked past Wes. He was still answering questions. There was a bus waiting to take us the hotel. I hopped up the stairs, feeling the coldness of the air conditioning rush over my head. The season opener was all that mattered now.

***

There were two different playbooks. I stretched my legs on the hotel bed and picked up the one designed for Warriors games. We had our own set of rules when we faced them. I had been over it at least twenty times before tonight, but I wanted to review the plays again.

“Sam, you in there?”

I sat up when I heard Stubbs’ loud voice and his fist pounding on my door. I walked over and opened it.

“Hey, man. What’s going on?”

“We’re going out,” he announced.

“Out?”

He grinned. “Hell, yeah. We need to blow off some steam. You’re coming with us.”

I shook my head. “I’m studying.”

“You sure you’re not still a fucking rookie?”

I glared at him. “Maybe I’m the only one who wants to win tomorrow night.”

He laughed in my face. “No, you’re the only fucker who thinks studying will make a difference. We’ve got this game. So come on. We’re going out.”

“I’ll pass.”

“Do you know where we are?”

I bit the inside of my cheek. It was rhetorical, so I waited for him to answer for me.

“We’re in fucking Austin. Where the Warriors live. Where they eat. Where they drink. Where people think they aren’t the biggest dicks on the planet.”

“What’s your point, Stubbs?”

He crossed his arms. “Not only are we going to beat them tomorrow night, but we’re also going to beat them tonight. We’ll drink their liquor. Hit on their women. Party like they could only dream.”

The Wranglers liked to party. No—the Wranglers liked wicked debauchery. We threw the kind of parties you couldn’t mention at Thanksgiving dinner. Last year, as the ring leader of the rookie class, I was responsible for the Dean. It was a tradition to give the veterans a party that satisfied their every sinful need. And I did a pretty damn good job. We had high-stakes poker, strippers, and top-shelf liquor, and no one left without an A-list blowjob. But that didn’t mean I was up for it tonight. Things were different. I wasn’t a rookie anymore. I had to prove myself and I wanted that damn bonus this season.

“Get your ass out here, Sam,” Stubbs ordered.

“I’ll meet you.”

“Like hell you will.” He jammed his foot in the door. “Get your wallet and keys.”

I hung my head. Damn it. This was the last thing I wanted to do right now. Stubbs’ grin said everything when I met him in the hallway. Tonight was going to be Wrangler-level epic.

2

Natalia

I hung the shirt and clipped the tiny skirt to the hanger and scowled at my uniform. I hated it. Sometimes I didn’t want to even look at myself in the mirror when I had it on. Then there were the boots. Who wore gold metallic knee-high boots? I had wiped the scuff marks from them and placed them under the dance ensemble.

Calling it dance was a stretch. It was basically a stripper’s outfit. I didn’t know how anyone could feel Warrior pride wearing that thing, but the other girls on the squad did. They loved it. They loved the W on their chests. They loved the mini stars on their skirts. They didn’t care that half of the shirt was missing and the only reason they got attention was because of their bodies. It didn’t seem to bother any of them. Except me.

And I would have to put it on again tomorrow night for the game. I’d parade around showing off my toned thighs and stomach. I’d wave my hands in the air and dance to the techno music with a huge Texas-sized smile on my face. After all, I was a Warrior Goddess.

I was trained to be a professional dancer, but this wasn’t what I had in mind. I could win a Tony for the acting performance I gave on the sidelines.

I let my fingers trace over the satin ribbon dangling from my pointe shoes. They were on the second shelf of my closet. I hadn’t tried them on again since the accident. I was tempted to slide my feet into them and pirouette around my living room, but it wouldn’t help my mood any. It would only remind me I wasn’t doing what I loved. The knots in my stomach wound tightly.

It had been nine months since I had worn them, and I didn’t know when I’d be ready to try them on again. I hesitated for a second, thinking this could be the moment, but I stopped myself. I didn’t want to face what it might mean if my leg gave way. The shoes I loved had made me a prisoner to fear. I was scared my supporting leg would never hold me again.

It was one thing to shake my hips and do kicks toward a crowd of Warrior fans. It was something completely different to put all my trust in the ability of my hamstring to withstand the intense pressure of dancing with pointe shoes. My entire body relied on my right leg to work in perfect unison, and right now I didn’t have that trust in myself. I couldn’t try on the shoes.

Instead I turned off the closet light and pretended there wasn’t a dance squad uniform hanging inside. I would trade it out for a hundred tutus any day.

I was thinking about taking a walk to the park near my condo and picking up a salad on my way home for dinner when I heard my phone ring.

I grabbed it from the kitchen island. “Hello?”

“Natalia, what are you doing, girl?” It was Heather from the dance team.

“Not much. I was just headed out to pick up dinner.”

“Good. Then you can meet the rest of us for drinks.”

“Oh no, I’m not up for that. It’s Sunday night.”

“You’ll be the only one not there. You have to go. It’s a Goddess tradition.” She sounded bubbly and excited.

I rolled my eyes. “And what tradition is that?”

“We always go out the night before the first game of the season. Just the girls. It’s so much fun.”

“We’ve already had games,” I protested. “It’s not the first one.”

“Those were pre-season and totally do not count.”

I was tired of the constant lectures on football terminology and rules. I didn’t know anything about the sport. I didn’t really like it. I didn’t understand why thousands of people paid two hundred dollars a ticket to watch men try to bash each other’s brains in. For me, it was only a paycheck and a way to get me back on stage where I belonged. I tolerated as much of it as I could.

I knew I didn’t make much per game. No one would be able to survive on a salary as a dancer. We were never paid for the amount of practices we had to attend, but the pay out came from the promotional events. Warriors fans knew no limits when it came to reserving the Goddesses for birthday, bachelor, or retirement parties.

I was promised a substantial bonus for appearing in the two calendars the squad printed each year. There was the holiday edition as well as a summer swimsuit collection. There was a rumor floating around that we were going to start wearing patches on our uniforms for advertisers. I didn’t know that I agreed with being a dancing billboard, but if that happened, each dancer would make a small percentage each time we wore it. The only way to make sure I profited as a Goddess was to dance at every game.

“I might have to sit this one out, Heather. But I appreciate the invitation. Call me next time.”

“Oh no. You are not going to be the reason the guys lose tomorrow night.” Her voice lowered an octave. It was her mother hen tone.

I huffed. What was she accusing me of? “Of course not. I always want them to win.”

I was praying she wasn’t going to tell me about some crazy powder puff tradition where I’d have to run on the field wearing a set of shoulder pads and a helmet during the halftime show.

“Then you have to go. You have to be there or they’ll lose. This is what it means to be a Goddess. You have a duty to the team.”

It was absurd. The traditions these girls came up with, or maintained for however many years, were ludicrous. It was completely illogical that the Warriors would lose if I didn’t go out for one drink.

Out of the forty girls on the dance squad, Heather was the one I had spent the most time with. We had been paired together at summer training camp. Sharing a room with her hadn’t been all that bad. She took dancing seriously—we had that in common. It just wasn’t the same kind of dance.

I learned quickly that the other girls didn’t want to hear about my training in ballet. They didn’t care who I studied under. They were here because it was a lifelong dream to be a Goddess dancer. Some of them were third generation legacy girls. Unlike them, I wasn’t trying to get a modeling contract or snag a spot in a player’s bed.

I had bills to pay, and when no one would take an injured ballerina, the Warriors took me in. I did appreciate the money. I couldn’t shake the rest of it. When I took the job in May, I thought eventually I’d wrap my pride around the concept of being on a dance squad, but my pride never backed down. I was a ballerina, and a respectable ballerina wouldn’t do what I did, even if it meant not getting evicted.

I sighed. If I didn’t go tonight, the girls would blame me. They would glare at me in the locker room, and every time I walked in the practice studio, they would hold me accountable for the game’s outcome. I wasn’t ready to start off the season that way. We didn’t have to be best friends, but we did work together.

“Fine,” I agreed. “Text me the bar’s address and I’ll meet you there.”

She squealed. “Awesome!”

“But one drink,” I warned. “I want to be home before ten.”

I wasn’t going to bother changing out of my workout clothes. I liked the fitted yoga pants and the lavender top. It reminded me to always move through space with graceful intention. One of the skills Madame Collette had drilled into me.

“That’s all you have to do. I promise. One drink with the girls, and there’s no way they can lose. And you know how they like to win.” I heard the giggle in her voice.

Again, this was silly, but I had joined silly. I was a part of team silly. I grabbed my bag and walked out the door.

3

Sam

The lights were dim. Dim enough that I hoped none of the locals recognized us. Despite Stubbs’ cocky speech, I felt pretty safe invading Warrior territory on a Sunday night. There was a guy on stage singing something about a road trip he took. I stared at my glass of water.

Wes came up behind me and slapped me on the back. “Sticking to the hard stuff?”

“Yeah.”

He held up his fingers to the bartender. “Two bourbons, neat.”

The guy already had them poured before I could turn down the drink. It didn’t help that I had a reputation from my rookie season. It was like rushing a fraternity when I was drafted. I made damn sure the veterans liked me, especially Wes.

Wes grinned. “To tomorrow night’s win.” He clinked his glass against mine and kicked back the thick liquor. I didn’t have a choice. I swallowed it and felt the fire from my throat to my belly.

“That’s good shit.” He slapped me on the back.

“Thanks for the drink.”

He pointed to the bartender. “Another round.”

Shit, he was just getting started. I took the second round and it went down smoother than the first.

“I know where to find you tomorrow night, don’t I?” he asked.

“Hell, yeah. The end zone.”

Wes was part of the reason my numbers had broken so many records. He liked throwing to me. And it worked. We were a winning combination.

“Just keep open.” He winked.

“Shouldn’t be a problem with the defense the Warriors run.”

We both laughed. We had a right to be cocky and arrogant. We were defending national champions. We earned the fucking right to boast. Not only that, but any chance to take a crack at the Warriors, we took.

Wes’s eyebrows waggled. “Check that out.” He tipped his head and I followed his eyes.

A group of girls walked through the doors and headed for the bar. Every one of the Wranglers had noticed them. It was hard not to. There was no one else here and they were hot as fuck. Each one of them had long hair, killer hips, and a set of tits that we’d all like to get buried in. As they walked past our table, I could smell the expensive perfumes and lotions they wore. It was like walking past a makeup counter in a department store. My teammates’ heads had all pivoted in one direction.

“Shit,” I whispered under my breath.

“Fuck is more like it.” Wes chuckled. I guess I wasn’t that quiet.

I kept my ass planted on the barstool while most of the team saddled up to the bar, shoving each other out of the way to buy the first round of drinks. This was trouble. Every one of those girls was a distraction to my buddies.

Some of the guys had wives or girlfriends. Hell, some even had kids. But when a group of women like that walked in, they had the power to erase all memories.

“Not getting in on that?” Wes asked. We stared at our teammates.

“Nah.” I shook my head. “I’m focused on the game. Not getting a piece of ass tonight.”

I could tell he didn’t approve. “You threw one hell of a Dean last year.”

“Thanks.” At the time, it was my crowning achievement, but there was more going on now. I had stats to back up my reputation, and I needed even more to get that bonus.

“So why are you holding back now? Seems like your kind of scene.”

I leaned closer to him. “I have a season policy. Can we leave it at that?”

“Ahh, one of those fuckers.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I snapped.

“You think you can only have fun in the off-season. I know the type. I just didn’t realize you were one of them.”

“I still have fun. I just don’t get involved with women. The game is more important.”

Wes stared at me. “No football player is that good. You start blocking out what’s around you, and you lose the game. You can’t act like there aren’t women on this earth for six months. Too much focus is bullshit, Sam. This isn’t baseball. Let those guys have their weird superstitions. Football players don’t do those damn things.”

“So you think getting shit-faced the night before a game and screwing some random girl is going to help us win tomorrow?”

He stood from the table. “Take my advice however you want. But I’ve been in the game long enough to know that extreme anything is never good.” He pressed his heavy hand on my shoulder and whispered in my ear. “Technically, the season doesn’t start until tomorrow, so you’re not breaking any rules tonight.” He slapped me once again and walked away.

I had to laugh. If anyone thought Wes Blakefield was the team leader who would mentor a rookie into taking the path of righteousness, they didn’t know the man. I’d probably never get that type of advice again in my career.

Most people would agree with me. Coaches would. Trainers would. But not Wes. He probably thought less of me now that I revealed why I was staying away from the women.

The singer started up again, and I looked around to see if anyone would notice if I slipped out. The guys were too busy talking to the girls. I could walk out now and nobody would give a shit.

I stood to stretch my legs. The door was on the other side of the bar. A red neon sign hung over the entrance that read Warriors. It was another reminder that I needed to be reading our playbook, not taking shots and buying pretty girls drinks. I could do that in February.

Our hotel was only a few blocks from the bar. I’d walk back, clear my head, then hit the book again. The way the guys were drinking I might be the only one who could hold my head up tomorrow.

I looked over my shoulder. Stubbs had his arm around one of the girl’s waists. Shit. He had two girlfriends back home, but that didn’t stop him. I shook my head and took a step toward the door. I wasn’t paying attention to what or who was in front of me.

“Ow!”

“Oh shit.” I looked down. I grabbed her arm before she hit the floor. “Sorry.”

I had plowed her over with one step.

“Watch where you’re going, maybe?” Her voice told me everything I needed to know about her before I even saw her face. She was strong-willed, opinionated, and not afraid to stand up for herself.

I helped her to balance on both feet. She smoothed the strands of hair that had fallen over her cheeks and tilted her chin. Her eyes lifted to mine and I swallowed hard.

Fuck. She was gorgeous. And not like the other girls. Every part of her was natural and flawless. I stared at her high cheekbones, arched eyebrows, and long eyelashes. There was grace in her movements. Even her scowl.

She brushed her blond hair from her face. The rest was pulled back high off her neck.

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t looking.” But I was now. I was checking out every inch of her. She wasn’t dressed like the others. It looked like she had run here from a yoga class.

She shrugged off my apology. “Sorry, I was a little rude. It’s fine.”

“Let me buy you a drink.” It popped out of my mouth before I could think about what I was saying.

She looked at me quizzically. “I’m fine, really. No damage done.”

“But I want to apologize. What do you like? It’s on me.”

She pinched her lips together and I noticed how lush and full they were. God, she was perfect.

She shook her head. “Really. It’s not that big a deal.”

“I insist.” I pressed my fingers to her wrist and heard a sigh escape those damn sinful lips of hers.

Her eyes flashed to mine. “All right. But only one. That’s all.”

“That’s all I’m offering.” I grinned. “Wait here.” I led her to the table where I had been sitting with Wes only a few seconds ago. “What’s your poison of choice?”

“Vodka tonic.”

“Got it.” I maneuvered toward the bar and threw a fifty in front of the bartender.

He poured a bourbon for me and a vodka tonic with a lime wedge for the girl. I walked back to the table. She shifted in her seat, and her loose shirt slid from her collarbone down her arm. Seeing a woman’s shoulder had never made my mouth water like that before.

She pinched the collar and repositioned it. “Thank you.”

I noticed how long and delicate her fingers were when she picked up the glass.

“It’s the least I could do. Are you sure you aren’t hurt?”

I’d knocked bigger men than me to their asses at the line of scrimmage. It couldn’t have felt good when I rammed into her.

“I don’t think I’ll have any bruises.” She brought the edge of the glass to her mouth.

I didn’t know what in the hell I was doing. I was getting ready to take my third shot and I was sitting with the most gorgeous girl in the place. I couldn’t blame Wes for any of it. He may have planted an idea in my head, but I was doing this all on my own.

I had already started a countdown of how long I had until the team meeting, or if I pushed it back farther—kickoff.

After all, the season didn’t start until tomorrow.

4

Natalia

This was unbelievable. I waited at the table while Mr. Sex on a Stick bought a vodka drink for me. What was I doing? I could handle flirting. I was used to it. As a Warrior Goddess, I had more numbers crammed in my hand as I walked through the tunnel than a stripper had one-dollar bills. So why was I suddenly letting this guy with piercing gray eyes trap me with a typical bar pick up line?

He had no idea I was standing there when he almost knocked me to the floor. I was impressed how quickly he reached for me. With one arm, he had me on my toes. I was more enamored with his wall of a chest. Holy hell.

I wasn’t that kind of girl. I wasn’t that kind of Goddess. I waved at Heather. She was talking to some guy with a tattoo crawling down both arms. She smiled and her eyes went right back to him. At least someone knew I had arrived, and I couldn’t be blamed if we lost tomorrow night. I had officially fulfilled my Goddess obligation for the season. I had been on the squad for four months, and I still didn’t feel like it was home yet. I didn’t know that it ever would.

God, I was fed up with all of it. The traditions. The guilt. The embarrassment.

“How’s the drink?” he asked.

“Good.” I took another sip. Vodka had always been my go-to.

If Madame Collette knew I was drinking before a performance, she would have had me doing a hundred pliés to make up for it. My thighs wouldn’t let me do it again. The burn would be seared into my memory. Ballerinas didn’t drink. And they certainly didn’t hook up with random hot guys.

But she wasn’t here, and I wasn’t part of the troupe. No, I was on the dance squad. And this was what the Goddess dancers did.

“Are those your friends over there?” He motioned to the girls, who were probably on their third or fourth drink.

I nodded. “Sort of.” I used the little swizzle stick to push the lime under the ice.

“Would you rather join them?” he asked.

His question caught me off guard. I froze for a second. I could be over there talking about photo shoots and the calendar that was coming out before Christmas. I could talk about how much I loved to shake my ass in front of the fans. How much I loved being on the Warriors’ payroll. How I lived and breathed two things: football and cheering.

But none of that was me. I didn’t want to talk about any of those things, or be reminded that I was a part of the squad.

I looked directly in his eyes, trying not to be thrown off by his dark eyelashes. “I think I like it over here.”

“I’m Sam, by the way.”

“Natalia,” I replied.

“Pretty. Doesn’t sound like a Texas girl’s name.”

I didn’t know why that made me blush. “It’s not. It’s French.”

“French?” His eyes glazed with lust.

There was a moment when the walls fell away and I couldn’t hear the girls laughing. I didn’t hear the guy singing on stage, or the worst pick up lines in history. There was a moment when I felt connected to this complete stranger.

“Mmmhmm,” I responded.

“That explains some of it, I guess.”

I could feel the vodka starting to warm my limbs. “Some of what?” I was curious what he would say.

“Let’s see, I’ve known you what?” He looked at the clock on his phone. “Five minutes?”

I nodded in agreement. “Yes, I think so.”

“And in five minutes, I can tell you’re different. Just how French are you?” He narrowed his eyes as if he was pretending to be a detective.

I laughed. “My father is French and I grew up in Paris. That’s how French I am.”

“So you’d say that tips the scales past the fifty percent mark?” He chuckled and I could see how sexy his smile was. Rows of straight white teeth set behind a strong jawline. Was it the vodka or was he becoming more attractive by the second?

I tended to think the neon lights and the lone singer with the guitar had something to do with it too, but I couldn’t stop staring at his arms. He was ripped.

“Probably so. It doesn’t help that half my family is in Paris and I go back and forth to see them. I take it you’re a Texas guy?”

I needed to ask him a question before I launched into the sad story of my parents’ divorce. I didn’t know why I had already divulged so much to him. He didn’t want to hear about how I alternated holidays between Dallas and Paris. Or how much I hated moving here when I was seventeen. Texas seemed like an armpit after growing up in France.

“Born and bred.” He grinned.

“I think Texans are as proud of where they are from as Parisians are.” I withheld the rest of my commentary.

He looked over his shoulder and scanned the bar. No one was looking at us. It almost felt as if we were the only ones here, lost in a back corner.

He turned around. “I want to say something to you.”

I finished my drink. “Okay. What is it?”

“If this makes me sound like an asshole, so be it.” He paused. “But I’m not going to be in Austin after tomorrow. I travel for work. So I’m not going to pretend that I can call you, or that I’m interested in taking you to dinner.”

I inhaled sharply. My stomach fluttered out of control. Where was he going with this?

“What I am interested in is taking you back to my room.”

His voice was so low it was almost a growl. A growl that sent shivers down my spine and tingled through my legs. Holy shit.

“That’s forward.” I eyed him. “Extremely unexpected and forward.” I arched my eyebrows.

“It’s honest.” He kicked back the rest of his dark drink. I didn’t seem to have thrown him.

“No try-to-get-my-number and promise-you’ll-call in the morning?”

He shook his head. “Nope. Not going to call you.” He eyes were set in a determined line.

I licked my lips. “Not even going to try to tell me you want to see me when you’re in town again?”

“Can’t do that.” He leaned toward me. “It’s not possible.”

My heart beat faster. This was unreal.

“I don’t know what to say. I’m either completely offended or completely flattered.” I think both described the emotions I was feeling.

He wrapped an arm around my chair. “Be flattered, darlin’.” His hand made a trail against my neck and down my arm until his fingers twined between mine. “It doesn’t get any more honest than this. I’m willing to break a rule of mine for this.”

“A rule?” I started to panic. “Are you married? Is there a girlfriend? Because regardless of how long you’re here, I’m not a home wrecker.”

“Whoa. Whoa.” He put up his hands. “There is no girlfriend, and definitely no wife.” He leaned toward my ear. “Tonight, there is you. Let’s go.”

“I didn’t say yes,” I whispered. But I was thinking it. Every part of me wanted to get tangled up with him for one night. This had to be the boldest offer I’d ever received. The guy was confident.

No one would know. He wouldn’t come back. He wouldn’t hassle me into another night or break my heart because I expected something. He was fucking gorgeous and all he wanted was me.

“But you want to,” he teased. “Don’t think, come with me.”

What was there to think about? He was offering the perfect one-night stand scenario. The excitement mixed with the anticipation and muddled my thoughts. Logic had lost and my hormones took over.

I nodded. “Okay.”

“Then come on.” He pulled me from my seat and led me out of the bar. The warm night hit me in the face, but it didn’t knock any sense into me. I fell into step next to him, realizing just how tall he was.

For once, I felt petite next to a man. It was hard being the tallest ballerina in the troupe. I was lucky to find a dance partner who met me eye-to-eye. But Sam wasn’t like those men.

We walked for a block before he stopped.

“What is it?” I asked, wondering if he had decided this was crazy.

Without warning, he pulled me behind another bar. This one had a sign for open mic night. I could hear a guitar through the open door.

“Wh-what…”

But Sam’s lips were on mine and I threw my arms around his neck. His hands snaked under my shirt and I felt the roughness of his palms skim along my back. I moaned as he dipped his tongue inside my mouth. I could taste the sweetness of the bourbon on his tongue.

It wasn’t the kiss I was expecting. A kiss between strangers should be awkward and out of sync, but this wasn’t. His mouth moved over mine as I sucked and toyed with his tongue. Our bodies matched a perfect rhythm, pressing together. This man I had known for less than an hour didn’t feel like a stranger. He felt like my everything.

My back was against the wall and Sam filled my vision. My senses. My need for something more.

He broke away and I saw the lust fire in his eyes. He could probably see it in mine.

“I needed to kiss you,” he explained.

I was speechless, either from the kiss or the fact that he was reading my mind. I had no idea how much farther we had to walk, but I hoped it wasn’t that far.

5

Sam

She tasted like something from a tropical paradise. The sweet lime on her lips was like nectar. I inhaled her, drinking her in. I almost lost control in that side alley when I heard her make that sexy little purring noise.

I tugged her hand in mine and walked quickly to the hotel. If tonight was going to happen, I wanted it to happen now. No more kisses in dark alleys. No more trying to grope her under her clothes. This wasn’t high school. I wanted to see the look on her face when I buried myself inside her.

My cock ached and my chest beat wildly. I’d never wanted a woman like this before.

“This is it.” I looked up at the hotel. The Wranglers always stayed at the same place when we were in Austin.

“Your company has good taste.” She approved.

I almost let something slip about the team, but I kept it in. She didn’t seem to know who I was and I liked it that way.

I held the door for her, expecting her to back out and turn around and tell me no, but she charged ahead. She seemed as determined as I was to make this happen.

I tapped the button at the elevator and waited for the doors to slide open.

I couldn’t get Natalia to my room fast enough. My hands tangled in her hair as I shoved her against the elevator wall. She groaned as I roamed down her back, gripping her ass. Fuck, she had an incredible body.

Her ankle slid up the back of my leg until it was hooked around my waist. I pressed between her legs so she knew just how fucking hard she made me. I was quickly losing control. All I had to do was spin her toward the wall and pull the stop button on the elevator. I could take her here and give in to every impulse pumping through my body. She toyed with my lips and I realized I wanted to savor her body for longer than just a quick fuck in an elevator.

The doors glided open and I pulled her with me. I reached into my pocket for the key, but my need for her took over. I shoved her against the door and breathed against her mouth, tugging on her lips. It took three tries with the key card before we were finally in my room.

The door slammed behind me and I picked her up. Her legs instantly wrapped around my waist and I growled into her ear. “God, this is going to be fucking amazing.”

She nodded as I descended on her lips.

This was it. The last time before the season started. I’d make it worth waiting an entire six months to fuck another woman. I’d give her everything I had. And she wasn’t just any woman. She wasn’t a groupie trying to land in bed with a famous AFA player. She wasn’t one of the Fillies on the dance team luring me into a season romance. This was a stunning, exotic woman. It was as if I had been given a season opener gift.

I spun, pressing her back to the wall. She clung to my neck, kissing me urgently. I wanted to explore every inch of her. Feel every curve of her body. Kiss her skin, and lick her tits. I wanted her to come in my mouth and on my dick. Fuck, I wanted everything from her. I wanted to hear dirty French words on her lush lips when I took her to fucking ecstasy.

I carried her to the bed, tossing the manuals on the floor. They landed with a loud thud, but they seemed secondary compared to what was in my arms. I’d already memorized them. Now it was time to memorize her.

She drew me closer to her face, sucking on my bottom lip until I thought I would explode. I was fucking hard as a rock. I pressed my erection between her legs so she could feel it. I wanted her to know what she was doing to me. And what she had to look forward to.

I grinned wickedly, tugging on the hem of her tank top. It was some kind of intricate shirt that crossed in the back and made her shoulders look sexy as hell. She worked out. That I could tell. But she was lean and graceful. Beautiful in all her movements. I hadn’t bothered to ask her what she did. That was part of the deal. Right now, I didn’t give a shit.

She sat forward while I worked the purple shirt over her head. I didn’t expect it to expose her breasts in one motion. I stared and then instinct kicked in. I pulled one nipple into my mouth, licking and sucking until it was hard like a little pebble.

Arching forward, she moaned. “Oh, God.”

I began my attention on the other side, biting at her nipple before I sucked it between my teeth. Her fingers clasped at my shoulders. “Shit, that’s intense.”

“I’m only getting started, darlin’.” My hand slid along the contour of her stomach, sliding under the waistband of her stretchy pants.

“Fuck, you’re wet.” I dove between her folds, moving my fingers back and forth quickly. I heard her start to pant and lifted my head to watch her. I slowed my movements, taking time to flick her clit then speed up again.

And then her hips began to rock, slow and steady. It was fucking sexy. Her head swayed back as I fucked her with my fingers, pushing one finger inside her before curling another deep inside.

“Ohh,” she whimpered, clenching around me.

She was unbelievable. I’d never seen anything like her in my life. I slid my fingers between her folds again and withdrew them.

Her eyes flew open.

“Don’t worry,” I whispered. “I’ll make you come more times tonight than you have in your life.”

“Promise?” Her voice was breathy. I knew I had cut her off when she was on the edge, but I was the one setting all the plays.

I tugged on her pants until they were over her hips and off her ankles. I took in her long legs, admiring how toned the lines of her body were.

“You’re fucking beautiful.” I looked at the slice of paradise between her legs. She was waxed in a perfect V shape. Everything was smooth and silky. Her skin glowed and I couldn’t decide where to start.

She watched me as I settled between her knees. I pried her legs apart so I could have a full view of what was about to become mine. Her nub was swollen with want. She was wet and I had her on the brink of the best orgasm of her life. I traced a circle over her entrance, and she quickly tried to suck my fingers inside.

“Is that what you want?” I asked.

Her head rolled from side to side. “I want to come. That’s what I want.”

I couldn’t take it anymore. I had to have a taste. My tongue started low at the base of her entrance then licked until I was flicking over her swollen clit.

She bucked under me, but I heard the groans in her throat. She fucking loved it.

When I touched her it was like I was living out some kind of fantasy. Her skin reacted to me. Her clit responded. Her mouth. Her tits. She was made for me. I lapped against her, knowing she was going off the cliff. Her body shook under me. Her hands gripped the top of my head, pressing my face against her center.

“Yes, yes, fucking yes,” she screamed.

I kissed her thighs, feeling the vibrations travel through her legs. I licked my lips as I shed my jeans. I loved how she tasted. How she kissed. How she came. And I was going to love fucking her.

6

Natalia

My body was still shivering from the mind-blowing orgasm Sam gave me. All I could think about was how I wanted more. I wanted his cock. I wanted more of his tongue. I wanted his hands all over me. I heard his jeans hit the floor and I sat up to rip the shirt from his chest.

I had imagined what he would look like without a shirt. I had seen the edges of a tattoo peeking from under the sleeve and now I’d finally see all of it.

The shirt slid off his smooth shoulders as my hands explored the ridges of his muscles. He was built like a solid block of marble. There was muscle defined by more muscle. I walked my fingers over the ink that raced up his arm. It was a dragon that looked as if its talons had hooked onto his bicep. It was sexy and beautiful at the same time.

My fingertips couldn’t get enough, but my core was aching for something much stronger than the power in his chest and arms.

He grinned at me. “Feeling good?”

I nodded. “Amazing.”

Had I ever let a man lick and suck my clit like that? Had I ever spread my legs without embarrassment? I couldn’t think of a time when it felt so right to have a man between my legs. Not until tonight.

Maybe it was because he was a stranger and we had an agreement. There were no expectations. No strings. Just pure physical lust and passion. And God, did he have a lot of it. He was cocky, but I didn’t care. He knew what he was doing. And that made him sexy.

“Do you know how sweet you taste?” he growled at the base of my throat.

“No,” I answered.

His mouth landed on mine, shoving his tongue between my lips. I could taste myself there. He pressed harder, sucking over my mouth. I clawed at his back, feeling the want fire through me.

“That’s what you taste like.” He grinned. “Like pure heaven.”

I licked my lips. I didn’t know it could be sexy to enjoy my own taste, but with it dripping off Sam, it was. I was turned on. I felt the heat of my wetness between my legs. I was beginning to ache again.

“And what do you taste like?” I taunted.

His eyes lit up. “God, I want to fuck your mouth. I want you to tell me how I taste.”

I wanted his skin sliding over my tongue. I wanted that bead of dew. I wanted the salty sweetness of his cock. He straddled me, planting his knees on the mattress next to my shoulders. I licked my lips, preparing for it. His shaft was wide and thick. It would take a few tries, but I’d give him the best blowjob he’d ever had.

I carefully wrapped my hands around his erection, guiding him toward my mouth. I licked with strong pressure, sucking in the first drop of dew off his head. He groaned and kicked his hips forward. My tongue swirled over the top, taking him in gradually.

He looked down at me and I saw the utter hunger in his eyes. My mouth opened and he slid inside me.

“Fuck,” he growled.

And I felt the glory of taking his big dick so deep in my throat. I felt the confidence surging through my limbs as he started rocking into me. I massaged his balls and tugged lightly while he passed through my lips. Nothing felt as powerful as this. He was loving every second of it. His eyes closed for a second and the back of my nails dug into his lower back. With a sudden jerk, he hit the back of my throat and I moaned. I felt his body tense and he quickly pulled out.

“Shit,” he whispered. He took a deep breath. “I want to fuck you deeper.”

And I could imagine it. Picture it as he plunged inside me. How he would fill me with his masterful cock. I was shaking, I wanted it so badly.

“Do it. Fuck me,” I demanded.

I swear I had never spoken those words before. But he had unleashed something primal in me. I could be completely wild and free with him. His touch did it to me. Or maybe it was his tongue. Or maybe it was the thought of how his cock would feel pushing inside me.

His hands slid under my back and rotated me toward the head of the bed. I looked around, feeling slightly disoriented. He grabbed the stack of pillows next to my head and shoved them under my hips. I felt them tilt in the air. I was completely exposed like this. He had control of me. All of me.

“You want it deep, don’t you?” he asked.

“God, yes,” I panted.

I eyed him as I pointed my toes and laid one calf on his right shoulder and then the other on his left shoulder. He kissed my knee, dragging his teeth over my skin.

“Your legs are fucking insane. I’ve never seen anyone as hot as you, Natalia.”

I smiled. I wasn’t about to tell him he was getting ready to sleep with a Warrior Goddess. These legs were how I got the job. That, and twenty years of ballet.

He rubbed his cock between my folds, coating the head of his erection with my juices. I tipped toward him, wanting to pull him inside. Needing him to fill me with everything he had.

“You feel too good,” he groaned. He ran the tip over my clit and I whimpered. I was aching. He was hard like a rod of steel and I wanted to feel the friction of our bodies rubbing together, sliding along each other. Making each other wet and hot with every touch.

He leaned sideways and I heard him rip the edge off a foil packet. I watched as he rolled it on his pulsing cock. He rubbed his erection between my legs, parting my slit.

“Sam,” I whispered. I didn’t know what more to say. What would make the pain stop. A pain that had me burning from the inside out.

He settled at my entrance and I gasped at how intense it was just feeling how I stretched around him. His fingers flicked and rubbed over my clit.

“Say something to me in French,” he whispered. “Something dirty.” His eyes glazed with hunger for me.

“J’ai envie de toi.” I could barely talk. “Baise-moi.”

He continued to massage his shaft through my slickness. “Tell me what you said.” He was breathing hard.

I pressed my palms backward into the tufted headboard, praying he’d sink inside me. “I said I want you. Fuck me.”

He closed his eyes and let the words wash over him. I’d say it a hundred more times if it turned him on.

“Baise-moi,” I repeated. “Baise-moi.”

The frenzy built until I couldn’t take it anymore. I was done playing. I grabbed his ass, drawing him to my center, and then he sank inside me with a solid burst of heat as our bodies fused.

Holy shit. Nothing had felt as intense as this. With my hips in the air, he could push deeper than I’d ever experienced.

As soon as he was inside, he lost control. He began pumping and riding me, sending me into oblivion. My legs bounced in the air as he gripped my hips, dipping in and out of me with solid strokes of pleasure.

Our bodies aligned like the perfect dance. His muscles moving and bending where mine shifted to accommodate him. His shoulders rippled with strength as the grace of my legs wrapped around him.

I’d never felt like I was dancing before when I was having sex, but that was exactly what it felt like. As if Sam was lifting me in the air and twirling me around, giving me the high of a lifetime. My body was whole. It was alive with desire and passion. I was spiraling, tumbling through ecstasy.

I stretched around his wide cock, desperately trying to hold him close to me. He rubbed my tits with his thumbs and I started to feel the coil in my belly unloosen. I couldn’t stop it from happening.

“I’m going to come. Oh, God.”

He pinched and toyed. “Do it, baby. Ride it out with me.”

I bit into my lip as he took another deep thrust. I cried out as the pleasure ripped through me, starting with my clit, then circling my body with bursts of rapture.

“Fuck,” he groaned as he unleashed himself inside me.

The sweat rolled down his chest and I panted as my second orgasm picked up where the other one left off.

I clutched his firm ass, digging my nails into his skin. “Don’t stop,” I begged.

I didn’t want the dance to end. I didn’t want the pleasure to be over. I wanted to stay in the air while he carried me through the high.

He grinned. “As hard as I am, I won’t.” He plunged into me again, then kicked my legs off his shoulders, pressing a kiss on my mouth with blistering heat.

I held on to him, clinging to his damp, warm body as the waves pulsed through me. One after another. I vibrated and shook in his arms.

He yanked the pillows out from my hips, lowering me to the mattress with a wide smile. I knew he had a plan.

He rolled on his back, pulling me on top. I grinned, knowing I could move with him like this. My breasts perked and I started to ride him with wild abandon. I felt the power of my body. The skill in my movements as he closed his eyes.

I had him. He was going to come. I rose up, bringing the tip of his cock to my entrance, then sank on him swiftly.

That was when his arms wrapped around me and he pulled me to his mouth, biting and sucking at my lips. I melted in his arms, feeling another orgasm surge in my limbs as he pumped in and out of me. I’d meant to drive him crazy. Blind him with passion, but our bodies together were like a combustible substance, and I lost the power I had over him. I lost it in his arms. I lost it in his lips as he fucked me with the gentle thrusts of my most beautiful dance.

He kissed the V of my throat. “I—”

“What is it?” I searched his eyes. I hoped he had the words that explained what was happening between us. I was looking for the words too, but I couldn’t comprehend what our bodies had done. What they were doing. I tried to catch my breath, but I was tingling all the way to my toes.

“Nothing.” He shook his head. “It’s nothing. Just that I can’t wait to fuck you while you come again. How did you say it in French?”

I kissed him. “Baise-moi.”

He chuckled. “Baise-moi?”

I nodded. “Oui.” My body felt warm pressed against him, the sweat of sex slick between us. I was somehow satisfied and restless at the same time.

“Then baise-moi, darlin’.”

I didn’t question him. But I didn’t believe what he had said either. He was about to say something important. I could sense it. I could see it in his eyes. And if he felt half of what I did when he was inside me, we had both fucked up. We had made the mistake of thinking we could leave the hotel as strangers, just as we had found each other in the bar. But this man didn’t feel like someone I didn’t know. Sam felt like part of my soul. Part of the air I breathed.

I looked into his eyes, wondering if he felt the same thing.

7

Sam

I heard my alarm go off and slapped the bedside table. Shit. I felt exhausted. My body was sore and I got two hours of sleep. I rolled over, ready to pull Natalia to my chest. I could let the rule slip for another couple of hours. It was still technically not the season. Not yet. Kick off wasn’t until eight-thirty.

Last night had been fucking incredible. Nirvana, even. It was the most epic one-night stand of my life. And in my gut, I wanted more. My cock twitched, thinking of taking her again. I wanted to taste her, feel her, and kiss her until the last second. I rolled toward the wall, but the covers were flat.

I sat forward. Her clothes were gone. Her purse was gone. The bathroom door was wide open.

I closed my eyes. Shit. She wasn’t here. I didn’t have her last name or her number. I didn’t know where she worked or what she did. What I did know was that she had done something to me, when I didn’t think that was possible. One-night stands didn’t affect me. They never had. And I’d have to make sure this one didn’t either.

I rubbed my eyes with the heels of my palms and let out a deep breath. I knew nights like last night didn’t just happen. Two people didn’t move together like we did. Do the things we did to each other. But I needed to file it in my memory bank and put a lock on it.

I stood from the bed and stretched my arms toward the ceiling. I needed to shower. The team would meet for breakfast in forty-five minutes, and then Coach would call a meeting to review the protocol for heading over to the Warriors’ dilapidated stadium. That place was a shit hole and we all knew it. Not only did we hate our rivals, we pitied them.

I pulled a T-shirt over my wet hair and the fabric clung to my chest. I stepped into a pair of jeans. Team meetings were casual. We wouldn’t have to dress up until it was time to ride over to the stadium. I stuffed my cell phone into my pocket and walked down the hall. It was hard not to picture Natalia next to the room door. I shook my head. Fuck no. I wasn’t going to do this.

I arrived at the elevator and waited for it. I told myself I wasn’t going to relive that kiss inside its walls. I wouldn’t remember how Natalia clung to me. What her ass felt like. How tight her long body was under my hands.

The doors retracted.

“Sam,” Cavan Grainger greeted me.

Thank God there was someone else in the elevator. I already needed a distraction from my own brain. I didn’t care if we talked about the fucking weather. He could say anything at this point.

“How’s it going?” I didn’t know Cavan well. He was on the rookie roster. He had been nominated to take my place this year as the coordinator of the Dean.

“Ready for tonight?” he asked.

I nodded. “Couldn’t be more ready. What about you? First time on Monday night. Big game too.”

He shrugged. “Trying not to think about that part.”

“Yeah, focus on the plays. That’s all anybody needs to do.”

The elevator deposited us in the lobby. We walked to the conference room together. I left Cavan to search for coffee before taking a seat. Only half of the team was here. They would slowly trickle down from their rooms. I hated to think how many were hung over, and how that was going to affect the game.

I didn’t have that kind of hangover. No, mine was worse. There wasn’t enough water or aspirin to get rid of the way I felt when I was with Natalia.

8

Natalia

The yoga outfit wasn’t bad. At least I wasn’t walking home in a black dress. This walk of shame looked as if I had gone for an early exercise class. No shame in that.

I had lifted Sam’s heavy arm and slid to the floor, dressing in the darkness of the room. I didn’t want to wake him. I was worried he would go back on what we agreed in the bar. I didn’t want him to call or know where I lived. I definitely didn’t want to tell him I was a professional cheerleader.

It was better this way. I’d pretend he was in town on business and would never be back in Austin. It would be easier. I didn’t have his number, either. We made an agreement, and my leaving before he awakened was the only way I knew how to stick to it.

Because if I woke up in his arms and took one look in his gorgeous eyes, I’d undo all of it.

I’d program my number in his phone. I’d tell him my horrid history with the ballet and the Goddesses. I’d tell him I loved pasta even though I shouldn’t. That I loved scary movies and hated football. I’d tell him my last name or even my middle name. If I had stayed and looked in those eyes, I’d have told him anything he asked.

Last night I had given him something I’d never given to another man. There wasn’t a name for it. It was physical and primal, but it was deeper than any connection I’d ever felt. It was the reason I had to leave. It was the reason I snuck out. It was the reason I was questioning every step I made on the sidewalk.

For a little while, I knew where he was. He was in the Austin Grand Hotel in room 621. But I didn’t know when he was checking out or where he was going. I had to drive home and stay there until I knew for certain it was past check-out time. I had to force myself to put the key in the ignition and drive home. Because if I didn’t, I’d race back to the hotel and break the promise I made. And as much as I wanted to see Sam again, I didn’t want to break a promise to him. It was the main thing holding me back. Right now, it was the only reason my foot was on the gas pedal.

***

I didn’t wear a watch. Instead, I checked my phone a hundred times before noon. I did a load of laundry and completed an hour’s worth of stretching. I would do the entire routine again before the game, but I had to find something to do to keep my mind off last night.

I jumped when I heard my phone ring, and for a quick second, let myself think it was Sam calling. I scowled at myself. It was Heather.

“Hey, girl.”

“Hey, what’s up?”

She laughed. “I saw you leave last night. Just checking on you.” I knew she wanted a juicy story.

I ran water in the sink to rinse out my bowl from breakfast. “How about you? Looked like you were having fun.”

The truth was I hadn’t paid attention to what Heather was doing. I spent my time talking to Sam and making a stupid decision. I wasn’t a very good friend.

“Oh my God, we had the best time. Aren’t you glad you went?”

“Yes.” I threw my bowl in the dishwasher. “Now I don’t have any guilt about that tradition.”

“You’re turning into a real Goddess. You know that?”

“Don’t remind me,” I groaned.

Last night, I was like all the other girls. I went home with a random bar guy. True, he was an incredibly hot random guy, but I had let the environment and the neon lights influence me. I convinced myself I was being rebellious and free, but when I thought about it, I was the same as my squad partners.

I hooked up in a bar. I had a one-night stand with someone I had barely known an hour.

It didn’t help that he had a rock-hard body, sexy voice, and eyes that…

“Nat? Did you hear me?”

“Oh, what? Sorry, I’m doing dishes.” I slammed the door shut and started the wash cycle.

“I asked you what time you’re going to be at the stadium for warm up. I thought we could run through some new steps. I talked to the choreographer about it.”

“Oh, that.” I sighed. “I guess I’ll get there at five. I need to do some extra work on my hamstring.”

“Is it giving you problems again?”

“The same. It’s better if I keep it warmed up. Less chance of reinjuring it.”

Heather was the only one who bothered to ask about my leg. She was also the only one who knew the extent of my injury. I didn’t want the others to think I wasn’t physically capable of being a Goddess.

“I’m glad it’s not worse.”

I smiled even though she couldn’t see it. “Thanks. Me too. Listen, I’ve gotta run. I have a lot to do before I head to the game.”

“All right. See you tonight. But I’m getting details when I see you. You’re not getting out of this that easily. I know your avoidance tactics.”

“Heather, there’s nothing to tell. I’ll see you there.”

I hung up and looked at the clock again. Finally. It was after noon and I could convince myself Sam was gone. He had driven out of town—back to wherever he came from.

I felt the exhaustion hit my body. I had barely slept. My limbs were sore in new places. And with the realization that he wasn’t in Austin anymore, the tension I held in my shoulders and neck rolled off my skin.

I pulled back my white duvet and climbed under the covers. I had been running on fumes. Forcing myself to push through until I knew it was noon. As soon as my head hit the pillow and my eyes closed, I slept.

9

Sam

I sat on the bench, gripping my helmet between my hands. I stared at my cleats on the dirty floor. We had been in some god-awful locker rooms, and some that would make even us jealous, but the Warriors’ guest locker rooms had to be the worst. There was peeling paint. Chipped tiles in the showers. Half the lockers didn’t close. It was disgraceful to the league. I didn’t know how they got away with it.

Some teams liked to show off their wealth. The Warriors’ ownership didn’t buy into that philosophy. They kept the money for themselves and let everything else fall down around the team.

I felt his heavy hand on my back before I heard his voice. I turned. “Ready?”

Wes was grinning. He loved this shit. His hatred for the Warriors ran deep.

I nodded. “Hell, yeah. Throw the ball to me every time and I’ll get it done.”

“What’s that?” Stubbs yelled from the other side of the junk pit.

“I said I’ll get the TDs this game.”

“Like hell you will.” The wide receiver strutted over. “I’ll take a few myself.”

“Come on, boys,” Wes chuckled. “We can split them. Stubbs, you take four, and Sam, you take another four.”

We laughed. The Wranglers had come here not only to win, but also to annihilate our enemy. We weren’t walking out of here with anything less than a complete and totally humiliating victory.

Right now, none of us were thinking about the cameras or the hype around the opening game for Monday night. We were defending national champions, and this game would prove that we were on our way to becoming repeat champions. We would rightfully claim the title of Texas’s team. The country’s team. It all came down to this game.

I pulled the laces on my shoes, making sure they were extra tight. I liked the feeling across my feet.

Coach Howell walked in the locker room. “Listen up.”

Our mumbling stopped, and we focused on his pre-game speech. I could predict what he would say. It was seldom different game to game.

“Guys, we came here for one thing—to win. It’s opening night. Everyone is watching to see if we can do what we did last season. They’re watching Wes. They’re watching Stubbs. They want to see if Sam can catch the ball. They want to know how many yards Persons can get against their defense. They want to see Grainger’s first game. And all the rest of you… they’re watching. Was it a fluke? Was it luck?

“Well, we know the answer to that. This is a room full of champions.” He paused for a second. “And we’re going to take this game back to San Antonio.”

We all nodded in agreement.

“Bring it in,” he yelled.

I lifted my helmet in the air with everyone else. We could hear the fans through the tunnel. They were screaming and chanting. They would boo when we took the field. They’d throw stuff at our helmets. They’d tell us to fuck off. But it was noise.

The points on the scoreboard would shut them up, and that would make all this shit worth it.

I bowed my head as the Coach led a Wranglers’ prayer.

As soon as Howell said amen, we clapped in unison and filed out of the locker room. I shoved my helmet on my head, ready to take the field. I didn’t care what the fans did or shouted. We were going to win this game. And I’d catch every fucking pass Wes threw my direction to shut them up.

It was everything we expected. The announcer called for the Wranglers, and as we stormed onto the field, the jeers were deafening. It only fueled our hatred. They thought they were getting in our heads, but they were feeding our determination to win.

We waited on the away sideline while the Warriors ran out of their tunnel. The fans cheered. There was a burst of fireworks overhead. Everything was a production. It didn’t feel like a football game. It felt like a circus.

There were cameras everywhere. Someone shoved a mic in Coach’s face before kickoff. I didn’t know how he handled it.

The Wranglers won the coin toss and opted for us to receive first. I jogged in place, knowing as soon as the special teams were off the field, I’d be on it. I looked toward the booth where Ross, our offensive coordinator, was assessing the defensive. I took my cues from Wes, but sometimes I could tell from Ross’s stance whether or not we had a problem. He looked relaxed from my angle.

The whistle blew and we had the ball on our own thirty-five yard line. It wasn’t a bad place to start. Plenty of room for me to run was how I looked at it.

I jogged onto the field and waited for Wes to call the play. The adrenaline was coursing through me. For a flash of a second I thought about last night. How the adrenaline felt with Natalia. Fuck. I shook my head. The lights blazed in the sky. The camera hovered overhead. The crowd was cheering so loudly I could barely hear Wes’s deep voice.

This was it. The first snap of the season. It was everything we had prepared for. Everything we had wanted. It all started with this first play.

I wiggled my fingers in anticipation. I rocked forward, ready to sprint to my open spot on the field. I expected coverage, but I could get open.

The ball was snapped and I took off on my route. I pivoted, and the ball hit me square in the chest. I ran, avoiding one defender and then another. I crossed the fifty-yard line and made it another five yards before the Warriors’ safety took me to the ground.

“Fuck yeah,” he hollered in my ear.

I jumped up from the ground, brushing the grass off my jersey. “Twenty yards,” I taunted.

He thought he had accomplished something, but we were in their territory and no one had stopped me until I crossed mid-field.

Wes called out the next play and I knew I was blocking this time. I wanted the ball, but I was a hybrid player, meant to throw the defense off. My size gave me the ability to block and my athleticism made me a hell of a receiver.

He handed the ball off to Persons, who took us another fifteen yards down the field. I could smell seven points. We were close.

We lined up on the thirty-yard hash mark. The fans were furious. They felt it too. The energy we possessed was electric. The Wranglers were going straight for the end zone.

This time, Wes threw to Stubbs, who caught the ball just inside the twenty.

I looked at the quarterback and read the signal. We weren’t going to run. No more blocking for me. I was headed straight for the goal line this time.

My heart beat hard, but my hands were steady. I wiggled my fingers and tipped upward, ready to run. I skirted around a lineman and darted across the line. It was a blur. I turned to catch the ball, knowing Wes would find me, but I saw a pair of eyes. Eyes that had pulled me into a deep undertow last night.

I whipped around just in time for the ball to hit me. My fingertips scrambled to hold on to the ball, but I clung to it, bringing it to my chest as the cornerback pounded me to the ground. The ground was solid on my back, but I managed to keep the ball on my chest the entire time. I opened my eyes, rolling to my side to stand when I looked toward the back of the end zone. It wasn’t possible. I forgot I was lying on the ground in front of thousands of angry fans. All I could see was her. There were at least ten yards between us, but I’d memorized every inch of her—there was no mistaking those lips or that body.

What in the hell was she doing here? Why was Natalia staring down at me? And why the fuck was she dressed in a damn Goddess uniform?

Stubbs pulled me from the ground, shaking me from the fog. “Hell yeah, brother.” He smacked my helmet, but my feet were rooted in the grass.

Wes slapped my back, but I felt as if I was in the Twilight Zone, not the end zone. “First TD of the season. That’s how we get it done.”

She stared at me, both of us searching each other’s eyes for answers, but the guys pushed me out of the way so the field goal team could set up for the point after.

I walked sixty yards away from her, trying to figure out what in the hell I was going to do now.

10

Natalia

Oh my God. He fell almost at my feet, as if he had taken a tumble from the sky. Sure, he was in the end zone and I was close to the fans, but I locked on his eyes. I wanted to turn away or cover up or run back to the Goddesses’ locker room, but instead, my boots kept my feet planted in one spot. My hands were on my hips with a pair of golden pom-poms nestled at my side.

Sam was a Wrangler? What in the hell was going on? He walked out of the end zone back to his bench and I stared at the jumbotron. I never paid attention to the opposing team. I barely paid attention to our team. Every time they called Sam Hickson’s name for a catch, they were calling out my Sam? Okay, that was stupid. He wasn’t mine, but last night, he felt like he was mine.

“Natalia, our line is moving. Come on,” Presley scolded me.

I had forgotten that after every score we moved to the next section of the stadium. It didn’t matter who scored the points, we kept moving. We rotated clockwise around the four sides. Eventually, the line of dancers I was in would be behind the Wranglers’ bench. I had to trade spots before that happened. I had to stay at this end of the field. I couldn’t see him again—not like this.

I raised my hands overhead, smiling at the fans, and took my next position behind the Warriors.

They were pissed. The Wranglers had scored within the first six minutes of the game. They were cursing like sailors behind me. I focused on the crowd and tried to pick out someone that might appreciate a smile. I saw a young mother with a baby strapped to her chest, a Warriors’ hat on its little head. I targeted her and kept my eyes straight ahead.

What was I going to do? My mind raced. My heart beat rapidly. I was going crazy. Sam was on the other side of the field. We had royally fucked this up. I tried to keep calm, but it was nearly impossible. It wasn’t as if I had slept with one of the Warriors players. But maybe this was worse. Everyone on my side of the field hated the Wranglers. I’d never heard of a rivalry like this until I became a Goddess.

I was sure I had broken some type of Goddess code. I had probably violated an employee rule. There could be consequences. They could throw me off the dance squad.

“What is wrong with you?” Presley asked from the corner of her mouth.

I waved at the baby again. “Nothing.” I grinned.

“You look like you’re in pain and you’re smiling all weird.”

I took a deep breath and kicked my good leg high in the air. “See? Fine.” I laughed, but if Presley could see it on my face, then I was terrible at hiding it.

“This is the most important game of our lives, Natalia. Get it together.”

“I’m fine,” I replied. “Let’s dance like we’re supposed to.”

I slung my arm around her as our line snaked together so we could kick across each other. Maybe if I focused on the routines I’d forget Sam was behind me. I’d forget last night. I’d forget that I was falling apart.

It wasn’t working. I felt off balance. I was smiling, but I was shaking. I lost the mom and the sweet baby in the crowd. There was a slimy guy staring at me and I cringed.

What had I done?

“Ow,” Presley whined.

“Sorry. Sorry.” I had pinched her shoulder. I wasn’t paying attention to anything but the fact that on the other side of this field was the most amazing one-night stand I’d ever experienced. I couldn’t get him out of my head.

“What is going on with you?” Presley growled through clenched teeth.

“I said I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to grab you. My boots slipped a little.”

“You’re going to hurt someone.”

I took a deep breath. I didn’t want a lecture from her. She had no idea what I was going through.

“I won’t. I’ve got this.” I kicked in the opposite direction, trying to relax my face into a genuine smile.

I felt bad for thinking it, but thank God the Warriors didn’t score on their possession. Our team line stayed in the same part of the stadium for another punt return. If the game ended now, with the Wranglers ahead by seven, I’d be happy. I wouldn’t have to rotate one quarter closer to Sam. I could escape without the awkward after-game exchange.

Although, what would that be? Could we even speak to each other? Would he want to? Would he realize I was a dance squad girl and not want anything to do with me?

This was a nightmare.

11

Sam

I paced behind the bench. As soon as the special teams returned to the sideline, I’d have to take the field again. I couldn’t see Natalia from our side. I scanned the dozens of dancers on the perimeter, but there were too many players in the way. I didn’t know where she was or if it was even possible to land at her feet again.

The Warriors called a time out and everyone groaned. One of the assistants ran over to me with a printed handout of the defense’s lineup.

“Thanks.” I grabbed the sheet to study it. But I couldn’t concentrate. All I could think about was looking up from the end zone and seeing Natalia.

Her long legs were decked out with gold boots and she was wearing a skimpy top. It was as if she was a mirage and I had imagined her, but I was positive it was her. The look on her face said everything.

“Looks like they’re changing their blocks.” Wes walked up behind me.

“Yeah, I see that.”

“I think we should throw to you three times straight instead of rotating between you, Persons, and Stubbs. It’ll confuse them for a few more plays.”

“All right,” I agreed.

Wes could be reciting the Greek alphabet right now and I wouldn’t know the difference. My head was reeling. I wanted the time out to last an hour so I could find her. I wanted to run up to each of the dancers until I knew what I had seen wasn’t a dream. She was here. Natalia was in the same place.

I heard the ref blow the whistle and jogged to the forty-yard line. I was on the far right side of the field and I made the mistake of looking at the Warriors’ bench. There she was, waving her pom-poms in the air. I’d know that ass anywhere. My lips had been all over it.

The adrenaline pumped through me, but I hesitated half a second when Wes called for the snap. Damn it, it was enough to put me behind pace. Everything was a blur and I struggled to settle my nerves. I knew I had fucked up no matter how fast I ran or far I dove to get in position. When the ball headed for me, I was off step. I panicked, knowing there was almost no chance I could redeem myself for hesitating at the scrimmage line. I reached for it, throwing my entire body into the air with my full force, but the ball slipped through my fingers and landed on the ground, rolling out of bounds. I hung my head as the fans cheered and the Warriors hollered around me. Shit.

Wes screamed at me over the defense. “What the hell was that?”

I shook my head and tapped my helmet as if I hadn’t heard the call. If I caught the next one, it would all be forgiven. I knew better than to look over my shoulder. Her back was to me anyway.

Wes grunted the call and I took off. I wasn’t going to miss this time. The ball hit me square in the chest and I raced toward the goal line. I ran another ten yards before the cornerback took me down.

The crowd was pissed, and that was enough for me to know Wes would be happy. Stubbs gave me a thumbs up and I took my position behind the line of scrimmage. I had to keep my head clear. Another catch and we could run a scoring play.

I cracked my knuckles and leaned forward. I could maneuver through the linemen with no problem. As soon as I heard the snap, I ran toward the center of the field and the ball came spiraling toward me. I grasped it and tucked it against my chest. I shoved off one defender and plowed down a second one. I could see the end zone. I couldn’t believe they were going to let me score this easily. I raced over the ten-yard line, when out of nowhere, the cornerback plowed me to the ground from the side.

“Thought you could score?” He stood over me, baring his teeth. “Not in Warrior territory.”

I glared at him. “Who has the points on the board?”

He stepped over me as one of his teammates hauled him away. He was one of those jackasses who liked to fight. All it would take from me was a real taunt and he would have thrown himself on me. He didn’t care about fines or penalties. He was a defender.

Persons walked up to me. “What did that damn corner say?”

“Nothing.” I shook my head. “He’s a fucking moron.”

Persons slapped my helmet a few times. “Going to let me get this six?”

I laughed. “You’re kidding, right?”

He looked straight in my eyes, the dark paint running down his cheeks from the humid night. “I don’t shit talk about the score.”

I knew I had to block this time, but I wanted those points. I needed them. I gritted my teeth together, determined to get open. If Wes saw me in the end zone, he would throw it to me no matter what play he called. We were alike in that way—we both loved to score.

I faced the Warriors’ front line. I glared at the man in front of me. His nostrils flared and his knuckles were white from pressing into the grass with over three hundred pounds of weight. I’d studied him. He was strong, but sluggish.

“You’re not getting past me,” he threatened.

“You sure about that?” I smiled, cocking my head to the side.

He was leaning so far forward it would be easy to throw him off balance. As soon as Wes took the snap I hurled myself forward, throwing the lineman to the ground. He grunted, reaching for my legs, but I was ready for the arms and hands that would come for me. I jumped high over his back, running past him into the end zone. Persons and I were on opposite sides of the goal post, but he had double coverage and I was wide open.

I felt the surge of adrenaline. The energy sizzle under my skin. I needed Wes to see me, and this play was mine.

The ball zipped close to my head and I caught it with one hand, yanking it from the air. There was no way to describe the feeling. The purity of the moment when I scored for the team. It was fucking unreal.

The Warrior crowd started throwing popcorn and beer cans down from the stands. Stubbs gave me a high-five and I felt like the luckiest bastard here. Back-to-back touchdowns and it was only the first quarter.

I tossed the ball into the first row to a kid wearing a Wranglers jersey. He jumped up and down. There were a few of our faithful here. Only you couldn’t hear them because the locals were so fucking obnoxious.

I crossed the field and took a cup of water while we waited for the field goal team to kick. I smiled. It was fourteen to zero and it was exactly the way we wanted to start the season.

I felt the high. The rush from scoring. The feeling that I was invincible. Nothing could stop me. Not the Warriors. And then I looked up and saw her marching in my direction toward the goal post. I swallowed hard. She was getting closer and I realized she spotted me too. I was on the edge of the bench closest to the goal line.

I couldn’t look away. I couldn’t pretend I didn’t see her. I couldn’t stop staring at her legs, or her breasts spilling out of that top.

I didn’t know how this would work, but I wasn’t leaving Warriors stadium without her number. She looked up at the crowd and ignored me, but I knew she felt it too. We had an unmistakable draw toward each other.

It was everything I didn’t want. Everything I said I had to stay away from. A distraction. The thing that could get in my head. The one thing that could bring me down. But she was twenty yards away, and she was the only thing here I wanted.

“Damn it,” I muttered.

“You need more water?” the attendant asked. I didn’t realize he was standing close to me.

I crumpled the cup in my fist. “Yeah. Colder next time.”

He ran toward the drink station. But I wasn’t paying attention to him, or the punt return. My eyes were on Natalia.

12

Natalia

We were one side closer to the Wranglers’ bench and I was so nervous my knees were about to give way. Sam saw me as we walked toward the short end of the field. He didn’t just look at me. It was a full-body stare, raking over every inch of me. My spine tingled from it, remembering how he undressed me last night.

How he ran his tongue over my skin. How he kissed me. How he felt when he pushed into me, taking me somewhere I’d never been. I let him do things to my body I’d only heard about. It was incredible and magic and hot and all the things I needed to forget.

Presley tilted her head toward me. “Okay, something is up. You are totally off rhythm, Miss Ballerina.”

I glared at her. “Leave it alone.”

“Can’t. You’re making us all look bad.”

“That’s ridiculous.” I waved at the crowd. They wouldn’t know if I was off step. The men drooled at us and the women mainly ignored us.

We weren’t the attraction here. People only cared about what was going on behind us on the field. There were nine other girls in my line. I wasn’t the one they noticed more than the others.

“Are you still drunk from last night?” she asked.

“What?” I turned toward her. I wasn’t pretending to shake my hips this time.

“We know you left the bar with a Wrangler.”

“What are you talking about, Pres?” Was I the only one who didn’t know who Sam was?

“Keep dancing,” she instructed.

I threw a leg in the air and shook my hair in a long circle. “Keep talking,” I spit back.

“The entire Wrangler team was at the bar last night and you’re the only Goddess who went home with one.”

My mouth almost fell open, but I knew I had to keep moving or she’d stop talking. I grapevined to the right with her and then followed to the left.

“What do you know?”

She shimmied, showing off the tops of her breasts with a jiggle. I followed her move. Times like this, I hated myself.

“That you either hate being a Goddess or you’re a complete football novice.”

I wasn’t going to tell her it was both. “You know I’m still learning the game.”

“That might explain how you don’t know who Sam Hickson is. He was the highest-rated tight end in the league last year. But the Super Bowl team was in the bar with us. The entire team.” She eyed me. “Wes Blakefield, the quarterback?”

I stared at her blankly. Ballerinas didn’t study rosters for football. Last year when they were at the Super Bowl, I was dealing with the catastrophic affects of my accident. I was in rehab seven days a week. Sometimes twice a day. I shuddered thinking about the brace I wore and the torture of daily exercises.

“Why didn’t someone tell me?” I hissed.

“Because Heather and I are the only ones who saw you.” She winked. “And you could use some fun.”

“What’s that supposed to be mean? You think I’m stuffy?” I didn’t know which part was supposed to insult me.

“Your words, not mine, but yes, you’re a little stuffy. You could loosen up and act like you aren’t a prisoner on this team.”

“I don’t act like that.”

But there was truth in what Presley said. I didn’t socialize after practices or games. I didn’t do movie night, or get my nails done with everyone. I used my experience on the squad to keep in shape, use the dance facilities, and learn new choreography. I made it work for me because I had to. There wasn’t another job that could offer everything the Goddesses did.

“You don’t act like it’s a privilege to be a Goddess. You should be proud of what you do, Natalia.”

“You’re right,” I agreed. “You’re completely right. What do I do about last night? I’m not the only one who was hanging out with a Wrangler. I saw you too. Everyone drank with the team. You were with Wranglers. I didn’t doing anything you didn’t do.”

“They bought us drinks. Not the same thing as leaving the bar with them. We left as a squad.”

It was almost time for us to do a group dance. I needed a few more answers from Presley before I got in place.

“But you didn’t tell anyone else?” I asked. “No one knows, right?”

“No, but if they find out, you’re off the team. No one can help you if it gets out. Not even Heather.”

“What?” My stomach turned. I might be sick in front of thousands of screaming fans. I didn’t love being a Goddess, but I needed the money. It was all that I had. It was how I had health insurance. It was how I rebuilt my leg to ballerina strength. I needed this job.

“You committed a cardinal sin,” she explained.

“I didn’t sleep with him,” I lied.

Her eyes widened. “You didn’t?”

“No,” I huffed. “He walked me to my car to get my number. And I didn’t give it to him. I didn’t even know his last name or that he was a Wrangler. This is crazy, Pres. I can’t get kicked off the squad.”

“Oh.” She chewed her bottom lip. “We thought you…”

“That I’d have a one-night stand?” I used my best astonished voice.

“I guess not. Ballerinas don’t do that sort of thing, huh?”

“No, we don’t.”

I walked behind her to start the team dance. I had narrowly saved my reputation. Now I needed to talk to Heather. In case word spread, I wanted to make sure it was the story I wanted them to hear. They needed to know I hadn’t broken the Goddess code. She was the team captain, and regardless of our friendship, she played a management role.

“That kind of sucks,” she whispered.

“Why is that? You said I could lose my job.”

She giggled. “Because Sam Hickson is fucking hot.”

I closed my eyes, inhaling a deep breath. She had no fucking idea how true that was.

13

Sam

The locker room was insane. We had bulldozed the Warriors by twenty-one points. Our defense had let them add a few touchdowns on the board, but that shit happens.

Coach could barely bark out his victory speech over all the music and dancing. I was surrounded by a bunch of happy, naked bastards. It felt good to win.

But she was in the back of my mind. There was no way I could walk into the dance squad locker room. And I had no idea where in the hell it was in this dungeon they called an AFA stadium. There were tunnels and hallways under the stands that I had never explored. We took one path in from the bus and the same one back out. It never occurred to me that I might need to know my way around.

That was the question. Did I need to know where she was? Was I actually thinking about poking around this place until I found her? I buttoned my shirt in front of the mirror, my hair still wet from the shower.

Yeah, I did want to find her. But it was going to be nearly impossible. And the guys would give me hell.

Things from last night started to make more sense now. We hadn’t stumbled upon just any stunning group of women at the bar. We had been smacked over the head by the enemy’s dance team. Now I knew why they all looked like models. The hair, the makeup, the perfume, and the tight clothes. It suddenly came into focus.

And then I thought about Natalia. She didn’t fit with the rest of them. She was wearing workout clothes. She barely had on a trace of makeup, and I never got the feeling she was there to impress anyone. Hell, if she did know who I was, she did a fucking incredible job of being unimpressed.

I stuffed my jersey in the bag labeled Hickson and threw it on the cart for the trip back to San Antonio. The equipment guys were scurrying around the locker room, collecting shoes, shoulder pads, and helmets.

Most of the players had started to make their way to the bus. We were headed straight for the team jet at the airport. There was no reason to spend another night in Austin when we could take a twenty-minute flight back. If I was going to try to find her, this was it. I had about ten minutes I could use up while the team filed onto the bus.

I darted out of the locker room and jogged toward the signs for the Warriors. It was a start. I hoped I found the dancers before I ran into one of the other players. I wasn’t welcome here, especially after our win tonight.

The lights flickered overhead. Crews in yellow jackets stacked chairs and toted bags past me. I kept running, stopping every few steps to check a hallway or door for any sign of the squad.

I didn’t have anything planned. Did I ask for her number? Did we talk about last night? Did we talk about the fact that we were on opposing teams? I didn’t give a shit. I wanted to just talk. That was why I was running through this labyrinth.

But it didn’t matter what corner I turned or where I looked, I couldn’t find the dancers’ locker room. I saw the cornerback who had tackled me strutting toward me. Damn it.

I turned quickly.

“Hickson, you’re in the wrong part of the stadium. Did you lose your way, little girl?”

I grinned. “Nah. I’m good.”

I wasn’t going to run away from the asshole, but I wasn’t about to start a fight either. Our bus was waiting.

“Sure about that?” He caught up to me.

I was easily a few inches taller than him, and I could knock him to the ground with one good swing. But I wasn’t looking for a league fine. I was looking for a girl.

“I’m good, man. I guess I walked out of the locker room the wrong way. My bad.”

“It is your bad.” He stepped in front of me.

I huffed. He was eating up minutes and the bus would be filled by the time I got there.

It was instinct, but I pulled my shoulders back. “Look, man. The bus is waiting. I’m just trying to get home. Not here to cause problems.”

This would cost me my bonus. I wasn’t going to hit him. I stood down.

One of his teammates walked up behind him. “Get your ass in the locker room, Floyd.”

“Just talking to Sam here.” He cracked a smile, but we both knew he was ready to rip into me. He talked shit, but he also backed it up.

“See you next month, Floyd.” I waved. We would have a rematch in four weeks.

The guy nodded at me, and I took that as my cue to walk to the Wranglers’ bus. My side trip around the stadium was over. I wasn’t going to find Natalia tonight. I ran through the corridors, pissed at myself for searching for her. Pissed I couldn’t find her. Pissed I couldn’t have last night again.

14

Natalia

I sat in the locker room staring into the mirror. I had wiped the blush from my cheeks and pulled the fake lashes from my eyelids until I recognized my reflection.

I didn’t know why I stayed as long as I did. Most days I was the first girl out of here, but I kept thinking about Sam. Who he was. What he almost cost me. Did it even matter to me?

Heather sat next to me. “Pres told me you two talked.”

She caught me off guard. “Just a little.”

“You and Sam Hickson?”

“No,” I corrected her. “There is no Sam and me. It wasn’t what you thought. He tried to get my number and walked me to my car. Nothing happened.”

Heather smiled. “I know I made you go last night, but maybe I wasn’t clear about some things.”

“And what things are those?”

“Goddesses have responsibilities. We have a legacy to uphold. And sleeping with a Wrangler isn’t on that list.”

“But—”

She held up her hand to stop me. “I know your car, Natalia. It was there when I left the bar. You didn’t leave when you said you did.”

Shit. I felt the color drain from my face. “Are you going to tell anyone?”

“No, but you aren’t either.”

“No, no one. It never happened.”

She pulled me into an unexpected hug. “It certainly didn’t.”

I didn’t know whether to feel relieved or disgusted. Was this blackmail, or girl bonding? I was confused. She smelled like hairspray and sweet perfume. Unlike me, she was in full makeup.

“Thanks, Heather. I mean it. I appreciate you keeping this between us.”

“Sure thing. It was a mistake. We all get one pass. You’re new to football and to the Goddesses, so I can see how it would happen.”

“Heather, I have a question.”

“Hmm? What’s that?” She sat back.

“If you knew who he was, why did you let me leave with him?” It had been eating away at me since Presley told me about the Wranglers in the bar last night. Every single one of them had known who was buying the drinks except me.

I was the only Goddess who didn’t know we were in a room full of the opposition. I was swept up in Sam. I was mesmerized by his eyes and arms. Was it that obvious to Heather? I waited for an answer.

She squeezed my arm. “You were having fun.”

My eyebrows rose. “You let me jeopardize my job for fun?”

“How did I know if he told you he played for the Wranglers? You’re a big girl, Natalia. I didn’t know you were going to leave with him. I might be the captain, but I’m not going to interrogate every guy one of my girls talks to and ask him what his intentions are. That’s breaking an entirely different code.”

I tried to avoid rolling my eyes. There were so many damn codes I couldn’t keep them straight.

“Did the other guys mention it? Did they tell you they played for the Wranglers?” I asked.

She giggled. “First thing out of their mouths.”

“He didn’t say a thing,” I said softly.

“He probably didn’t want you to think of him as a football player. I’m guessing you didn’t tell him you’re a Goddess.”

I shook my head. I wasn’t going to tell her I didn’t want him to know. I did everything to avoid the topic of careers when we met. I was ashamed to put on this uniform, but to Heather, it was everything. She had Goddess pride I couldn’t comprehend. Presley had already called me out on it once tonight. I needed to think about what she said.

“So then neither of you knew what you were doing. Like I said, you get a freebie. Don’t worry about it. Just don’t do it again. Wranglers are off limits, girl.”

“I can’t lose this job, Heather. It’s all I have. I’m committed. I swear.”

“Aww, honey, don’t talk like that. It’s going to be fine.”

I didn’t want to cry in front of her. But my eyes stung from too much makeup and the trap I was now in. If the Warriors fired me, I didn’t have a safety net. My father had cut my mother and me off when she moved us to Dallas. Once that happened, I never felt like I could take a penny from him.

My mom made sure I attended dance school in Dallas and paid for all the lessons and instructors I wanted. I couldn’t go to her now and ask for more. I was determined to live doing what I loved, and with the sudden realization I could lose this job, I discovered how lucky I had been all along to land on this dance squad.

I dabbed a tissue to the corner of my eye. I smiled weakly. “It’s not like we’d see each other anyway, right?”

She laughed and picked up her travel bag with the gold Goddess logo on the side. “We play them next month in San Antonio.”

“Oh.”

“Are you going to be okay?”

I folded the tissue and tossed it in the trashcan. “I’m good. Really. Thank you again, and I think I really understand what you need from me on this team.”

“It’s between us. Don’t lose any more sleep over Sam Hickson, okay?”

I lied again. “Okay.”

“Good night.”

“Good night.”

Heather had reminded me again I was out of my league. I hadn’t looked at the schedule or realized we played the rival team twice a season. We would be in Sam’s city in a month. I’d have to see him again.

That was the problem. I wanted to. I wanted a glimpse of those eyes, and his hands. I wanted to remember his lips searing into my skin. I didn’t want to forget Sam, but I had to. As long as I was a Goddess, I had to stay far away.

Besides, now that I knew he was a famous tight end, things seemed different. He wouldn’t want me. I had been around the Warrior players enough to know the drill. They were multi-millionaires. They kept their distance from the squad, and I knew the Wranglers wouldn’t be any different. If I remembered, they had their own dance squad, the Fillies, who probably filled the same role we did.

I pressed my forehead on the vanity table, taking deep breaths until the stadium was silent and the only thing I could hear was the sound of my breath. I had a month to forget about last night and get my shit together.

15

Sam

One month later

My name was engraved on a gold plate over my locker. I wiped a finger across the letters. I remembered the first time I walked in the locker room as a rookie and saw my name with my uniform set up in the mahogany cubby. Hard to believe that was over a year ago.

Everything was here ready to go. My cleats, my shoulder pads, my helmet were all sitting out lined up. I picked up the helmet. The W emblazoned on the side was shined, reflecting the lights overhead. This place was immaculate. I loved it. Every square inch of it. It was always my dream to play for the Wranglers.

How could a kid grow up in Texas and not want to play Texas football? My grandfather played. My dad played. And now I played. This was my legacy. It was my birthright to be a Wrangler.

Some days, it didn’t feel real. But here I was, about to suit up for today’s game against the Warriors.

Cavan dropped his bag next to me. “Can you believe we’ve won four in a row?”

“Nice being on a championship team, isn’t it?”

I only had one season under my belt, but standing next to the rookie, I felt experienced. I was on the winning team. He hadn’t earned that honor yet.

“Yeah. Wouldn’t trade it for the world.”

“Today will make five.” After we ran up the scoreboard on them last month, we felt confident today’s game wouldn’t be a problem. I liked starting the season five and O.

“You going to be at the Dean, right?” he asked.

I nodded. “Of course. Wouldn’t miss it. But I doubt you can do better than what I pulled off last year.”

“Heard you had more women than we have guys on the team and a high-dollar poker table.”

“There was more than that. It was epic. Last year goes down in the history books. They say it was the best Dean ever.”

“I don’t think you’ll be disappointed.”

I pulled the parts of my jersey out of the cubby. “I’ll be there.”

“I’ve basically asked everyone about the Deans from back in the day. Even the first one Larry Dean threw, and it’s going to have a little bit of everything.”

“You talked to some of the old Wranglers?”

He nodded. “You should have heard them talk about the first Dean.”

“Damn.”

A few of the other guys began to trickle in while we talked about the party. I knew what it was like to organize the event. It was a bitch at best. But it was a Wrangler tradition the guys loved.

I’d make a quick appearance and get out of there. I wasn’t going to get trapped into breaking my rule again. I’d already made that mistake once this season.

***

I had almost forgotten. Almost.

And then I saw her from the corner of my eye. She was behind the Warriors’ bench, cheering for the small crowd of fans assembled on the opposing team’s side.

Her hair seemed longer. It was down around her shoulders and her arms waved wildly in the air with pompoms. She looked beautiful. Gorgeous. I wanted to run across the field and tell her what she was doing to me. I wanted to tell her she was the reason I had forgotten the next play I was supposed to run. She was why I had forgotten the last play I did run.

I saw her and I remembered the night we spent together last month. I thought I had found a way to keep it from interfering, but one glimpse of Natalia and my hard work was over. I was so fucked, there weren’t words for it.

“Sam?”

I held my helmet. “Yeah?” I didn’t know who had called my name.

“You’re supposed to be out there.”

Whoever it was shoved me onto the field. I stumbled to the line. It happened again. My mind felt fuzzy. I remembered her lips and the way she tasted on my tongue. The smoothness of her skin and how her toned legs felt under my stroking palm.

God, I had lost it. I had fucking lost my mind to let a girl get in my head like this. This was exactly what Maddie had done. She had made it so it was impossible to think. I couldn’t concentrate after she fucking obliterated my trust.

I wiggled my fingers, trying to reconnect to the game. I needed to ground myself here. Smell the sweat. Hear the growls across the line. Watch the anger flare in the Warriors’ eyes.

Wes called the play and I lunged forward with the anger pent up inside me. Anger I didn’t realize I was still carrying from all those years ago. I tossed the lineman to the ground as if he weighed half as much as I did instead of double. There was satisfaction in seeing him pound his helmet into the grass.

There was a reason I loved playing this position. I could run and score, but there were moments like this when I could focus my energy on the sole strength of my body and shove another man’s face on the chalk lines of the field. My fists clenched as I took a deep breath and moved away from him.

As soon as it was over my eyes were on their sideline. I couldn’t look away. She kicked her leg high in the air and I remembered that leg on my shoulder. I remembered kissing her calf as I fucked her like I’d never fucked another woman.

I shook my head. I had to get back in the zone or I was going be the one to get knocked on my ass. I had pissed that lineman off. He cracked his knuckles and growled at me. He wasn’t going to be as easy to take down this time.

I was still tracing the lines on her legs when Wes crouched behind the center.

“21-42-Go-Go!” Wes shouted and I froze. My eyes cost me a second to prepare. I was staring at her instead of dodging the angry Warrior gunning for me. The lineman dove at my thighs and I landed on my back with a heavy thud. I felt the impact rattle my teeth. Damn it.

I stood up, shaking off the hit.

And I looked across the field again. She was staring at me. For that second, I didn’t hear the fans or the whistles. I didn’t hear the lineman taunt me, or the coordinators shouting from the sideline. I saw her, and this time, I wasn’t going to let her get away.

16

Natalia

I was supposed to be prepared for this. I had told myself repeatedly that seeing Sam Hickson wouldn’t affect me, but I watched as he hit the ground and I had to keep myself from running on the field to see if he was okay. Who does that? What was I thinking? Where had that need come from?

I wasn’t a medic. I wasn’t even his girlfriend. But I felt it. The pull to him the instant I thought something was wrong. I didn’t want him to be hurt or feel pain. I waited nervously for a sign that it wasn’t a serious hit.

I had to get out of Sam’s city. The only problem was, we weren’t leaving until tomorrow. The Warriors had decided to do promotion for the Goddesses in San Antonio. I didn’t know why. And now I realized why I had felt anxiety all week. It was the same feeling I got before a big performance. My hands were sweaty and I’d wake up in the middle of the night for no reason. I tried to reassure myself I was fine, but I wasn’t. How could I be with Sam this close?

He jumped up and ran back to the line. I let out a big breath. He was okay. I turned to face the fans and smiled, kicking my leg high in the air.

It had been a month. A month that didn’t include him. A full month of me throwing myself into practice as if I were the most dedicated Goddess on the squad. A month where I made appearances at charity events and hospitals. A month when I posed for two different calendars. A month I fell asleep begging myself not to dream about his body. A month when I had failed at anything to do with shutting Sam Hickson out of my thoughts.

***

The forty girls on the team had a bus for driving around San Antonio. I hauled my bag to the side of the big vehicle blowing diesel exhaust, and shoved it underneath the cargo hold. The mood around the team wasn’t good. They had lost again. And there was nothing worse than losing to the Wranglers.

“I hate it when the guys lose,” Heather whined.

“Me too.” I patted her shoulder.

We walked up the stairs and took a seat behind the driver. I heard we were staying on the Riverwalk. The guys were flying back to Austin tonight. I was glad we weren’t on the same flight. I knew what that trip would be like.

They would argue about the refs, and how there was a conspiracy to make the Wranglers Texas’s team. They’d curse like sailors and complain about the plane. I’d heard it before.

It was a quick ride to the hotel, and we gathered around the side of the bus as our bags were tossed on the sidewalk. I selected mine from the pile and lugged it on my shoulder.

“Glad we’re rooming together.” Heather walked up next to me. “It’ll be like training camp.”

“Except we don’t have to get up at five,” I reminded her.

“True. We can sleep in for once.”

Our manager had emailed the schedule for tomorrow and our first photo shoot didn’t start until almost eleven. I had a vision of sleeping in and ordering room service. It sounded as if Heather was as tired as I was. We practiced four days a week, made charitable appearances, met early before games, and danced for four hours straight during the games. By the time the game was over, we were exhausted. Mondays were usually our days off, but not this time. We had to work.

It took a while for all of us to check in. It would have been nice if the squad had let us have our own rooms, but if I had to have a roommate, Heather was a good choice. I felt closer to her over the past month. She knew my secret about Sam, and even though we didn’t discuss what happened, it gave us an intangible connection.

She handed me the key card to the room. “What if we get in our PJs and have a romcom marathon and order some dinner?”

I smiled. “I love that idea. I don’t think I can muster up the energy to go out. I’m exhausted.”

“I call dibs on the shower.” She giggled, pretending to race me to the elevators.

I wished we were in a fancy hotel with big Jacuzzi tubs, but there was no way ownership would spring for that. The back of my leg was starting to ache. It usually did after a game. It was another reminder that I wasn’t ready for troupe auditions. The more I danced, the stronger I became. Sticking with the Goddesses had been good for me. It was increasing my stamina and my muscle awareness. I saw that now.

I followed Heather in the elevator and to our room. She took the bed closest to the window.

“Why don’t you look for the romance channel while I hop in the shower?”

“All right.” I picked up the remote and sat on the edge of the bed.

I was still wearing my Warriors traveling suit that marked us as the dance team when we were going to a game. The pants were tight, but stretchy, and the top zipped up over a sports bra.

I looked around the room when I heard the phone buzz. I leaned over a pile of pillows and grabbed the receiver.

“Hello?”

“Hello, this is the front desk.”

“Hi.”

“I have a delivery for a Ms. Dupont.”

“Me? What is it?” I couldn’t imagine what was at the desk. We hadn’t ordered food yet. “I’m not expecting anything. It might be for one of the other girls.”

“No, no. It specifically says Natalia Dupont.”

“Oh. Okay, I guess I’ll be down in a few minutes.”

“Thank you, Ms. Dupont.”

I hung up and knocked on the bathroom door. “Hey, Heather, I have to run down to the front desk to pick up something. I’ll be right back.”

“Okay, I’m almost finished,” she called through the door.

She had been in there at least fifteen minutes. I doubted she was in a rush to get out.

I picked up the second key card and shoved it in my jacket pocket. I tried to think of what was waiting for me downstairs as I rode the elevator to the lobby level.

As soon as the doors retracted, I knew. He didn’t have to turn around for me to recognize him.

Sam.

He must have heard the elevator ding because he spun around to face me.

I was afraid to approach him. My heart pounded. I was certain he’d be able to hear it. I froze next to the elevators.

Was it stupid that I wanted to run and jump in his arms? At the same time, I couldn’t move.

“Natalia.” His eyes lit up and it all came flooding back.

The night in Austin together. The night I gave myself to him completely. The night that haunted me no matter what I tried to do to forget it.

He walked toward me and I felt the blood rush through my veins.

“Wh-what are you doing here?” I stammered.

“I wanted to see you,” he replied.

God, that voice. It was smooth and low and made my core start to ache.

I looked around the lobby, realizing one of the Goddesses could spot us talking. I grabbed his arm and pulled him into the closest room I could find. It was a ballroom the hotel used for conferences. It was dark inside, and I suddenly realized this might be worse than being seen together in the light.

“We can’t… We said we wouldn’t…” I couldn’t put a full sentence together.

Sam’s hands rested on my face and pulled my mouth toward him. I took a breath before his lips descended on mine. I didn’t know if it was instinct, want, or pure misery from missing him, but I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him harder than I’d ever kissed anyone in my life. His tongue whipped wickedly over my tongue and I moaned when I felt his teeth nip along my bottom lip, dragging it playfully.

“God,” he groaned. “It’s better. It’s how I remembered.”

“Don’t stop.” I reached for his lips again, inhaling his mouth, pressing into him with my body.

It felt as if there was fire in my fingertips as I roamed his body. I couldn’t touch him enough, or cut the distance between us. I panted with every kiss.

“How?” I looked into his eyes. “How did you find me?”

He exhaled. “I called around until someone confirmed this is where your squad is staying.”

“Oh. And they told you?”

“Not room numbers, but I knew you were staying overnight at one of the Riverwalk hotels. Our press guy filled me in.”

“Right.” My chest was about to explode. His hands slid to my ass and he squeezed. He spun me against the wall until my back was flat as his body pinned me.

“And my last name?” I asked.

He kissed my throat and breathed heavily. “I looked you up on the Goddesses’ roster.”

I wanted to crumple on the floor. Sometimes I forgot I was listed on a website for anyone to see.

His lips hovered until they crashed against me. His kiss was rough this time.

“I want you, Natalia.”

“Oh, God.” His lips feathered over my throat and I felt myself awaken with need and want I hadn’t felt in a month.

“Let’s go to your room,” he suggested. He pushed my arms over my head and held my wrists together.

I shook my head. “I have a roommate.”

“Roommate?” But his lips didn’t stop.

“Yes.” His hands were digging into the band at my waist. I moaned as he slipped a hand between the layers of clothing and skin. His fingers moved between my folds until I knew he was coated in my essence.

I quivered, my knees shaking as he held me to the wall and his fingers made circles that tightened the coil in my belly. He pinched the delicate outline of my clit and I whimpered.

“I have a plan,” he growled into my ear.

“What?” I whispered.

“I’ll get a room here.”

His finger plunged inside my entrance and I bit my lip. I started clenching and squeezing around it.

I nodded. I wasn’t thinking. I was only feeling. And what Sam was doing to me was sinful bliss. My body reacted to him with unleashed passion. He kissed my neck and added another finger.

“But first.” His eyes were on me. “I’m going to watch you come like this.”

My chest rose with heavy breaths. I couldn’t look away. His fingers worked their magic between my legs as the intensity spiraled.

I was wet and panting, pinned to the wall. My hips gyrated toward him, wanting him to fill me every time he pulled away.

“Fuck me like this, Natalia,” he ordered. And I lost all control. My hips bucked and my muscles clutched around his fingers. It was building inside me like a wildfire and there wasn’t anything that could extinguish the heat except Sam.

I tried to look away, but his voice deepened. “No. Look in my eyes when you come.”

I stared at him, knowing I was seconds away from exploding. My thighs tingled and my belly pulsed when the orgasm hit me.

“Oh, God, Sam.” I breathed. I let it circle my body from head to toe as the heat warmed me.

His hands slid from between my legs. “I’m going to get that room now.” He kissed me and ducked out of the door.

My head fell back on the wall and I tried to steady myself. But I knew I wasn’t steady. I was off balance and off center. My body wasn’t mine when Sam was around. I tried to straighten my jacket and rearrange my pants.

A few minutes later, the conference room door opened. “Come on.”

“Wait.” I stopped him.

“What is it?” he asked.

“I don’t think we can do this.” I didn’t want to tell him, but I had enough time to regulate my heart rate.

“Of course we can. And we are.”

“I’ll get fired if anyone finds out that I was with you,” I tried to explain.

I was also starting to feel guilt. I had promised Heather she could count on me to be a quality Goddess and sleeping with Sam broke that promise. She was upstairs expecting a romcom marathon, and I was in a dark ballroom hooking up with the enemy.

He wrapped an arm around my waist and I felt my resolve slip too quickly.

“So don’t tell anyone.”

I pressed against his chest and felt the solid muscle under his T-shirt. Holy shit. I had forgotten how ripped he was.

“It’s not that easy. I have a roommate who thinks I’m downstairs picking something up. She’s waiting for me to order in and watch movies all night. I can’t go with you. I just can’t.”

He pulled the hair from my face. “Do you know I tried to find you after the last game?”

“You did?”

He nodded. “I ran from one end of that stadium to the other looking for you. I tried every door, every damn tunnel. And I couldn’t find you.”

“You tried to find me even though we agreed? You weren’t supposed to do that.”

“I did it anyway. And then I ran into Floyd and had to get back to the bus. But I was as surprised as you were that we were… who we are,” he finished.

“I’m not a Goddess, really. I mean I am, but it’s not my career and I didn’t want you to know.” I hung my head. “It’s not who I am.”

“Who do you want me to know?” His voice was low and deep.

“The ballerina I used to be,” I answered. I almost had tears in my eyes. I was glad it was dark and he couldn’t see me. “The girl who danced on water. The prima ballerina who had confidence and grace.”

“And you don’t think I see all those things?”

“I don’t know what you see. I don’t want you to look at me like I’m one of the Goddess dancers. That I know.”

He lifted my chin with his finger. “I don’t care what you do. It doesn’t matter to me if you dance for the Goddesses or an orchestra. I’m here tonight, you’re here tonight, and I have a room for us.” He held up the key card. “Let’s use it.”

“And get fired?” I tried to wiggle free, but he was strong. “I don’t plan on having this job much longer, but right now, it’s all I have. I can’t get fired, Sam. You are off limits. I can’t be with you.”

“But you just said you don’t want to be a Goddess. I’m fucking confused.”

I sighed. “I’m going back to the ballet. I am. But auditions aren’t until March. I have to stay with the Goddesses until then. And as long as I’m on the Warriors’ dance roster I cannot under any circumstances be seen with a Wrangler. I gave them my word. It breaks the Goddesses’ code.” I folded my arms, thinking I had made my point.

“And I can’t let you out of San Antonio without another night together, so we better figure this out right now.”

He let go of me and pulled out a chair at one of the tables. It was set for an accountants’ meeting in the morning.

“Sit,” he ordered.

I took a seat as he sat across from me.

“This is crazy. I work for the Warriors. You work for the Wranglers.”

“Darlin’, I’m aware of this situation, but I have a bigger problem and you’re the only one who can fix it.”

“What’s that?”

“Look, I don’t date during the season. I don’t go near women.”

I crossed my arms. I wasn’t sure I liked where this was going.

“But, the more I try to forget you, the more you’re in my head. That night is in my head. And I think being with you is the only way to keep my game straight.”

I felt a flare of anger. “You think I’m some kind of good luck charm?” I was louder than I meant to be.

“No. I didn’t say that. I said you’re in my head. I think I see you in the crowd and I drop the ball. I think I hear your voice and I run the wrong route. I remember that night and I block the wrong guy.”

I was quiet for a moment. “What if I told you the same thing? Not routes or blocking guys, but I’ve missed steps and routines. I called the wrong cheer and almost kicked one of the girls in the face because I went the wrong direction.”

“Then I’d say there’s only one way to get out of each other’s head.”

“And my roommate?”

He thought quickly. “Call up to the room and tell her your uncle came by to see you.”

“Uncle?” I giggled.

“Make up someone.”

I knew he was right. I had to be with him tonight. As badly as he needed to be with me. And I’d tell an endless pot of lies if that was what it took to get in his bed. No matter how wrong this was. No matter what codes I broke.

“What’s the room number?” I asked.

“402.”

“I’ll see you in a few minutes.”

He leaned over the table, brushing his lips over mine. The kiss blistered my lips and I reached for his neck, needing more. He broke away.

“See you soon.”

He walked out and I went in search of the complimentary concierge phone to call Heather.

17

Sam

I took the elevator to the fourth floor. It had taken all the restraint I had not to finish what I started in that ballroom. My cock was hard, and Natalia had awakened the beast in me. I was missing the Dean for this. But she was worth it.

I let myself into the room. I had reserved a suite for the night. It wasn’t as if I needed to impress her, but there was something in me that wanted to.

A few minutes later, I heard a knock on the door and walked over to let her in.

“Hi,” she greeted me softly.

I picked her up and carried her into the room. “Hi.” I devoured her lips with kisses while she clung to me. “Roommate taken care of?”

She nodded. “I’m out for a few hours.”

“That’s all?” I let her feet touch the floor.

She stared at me. “It has to be enough.”

I didn’t want to waste another second if we didn’t have but a few hours together. My hands landed on her zipper and I yanked until it fell to the side and I saw her breasts heaving under a bra.

I shoved the jacket over her shoulders. I kissed one and then the other. Her head reeled back and I thought of all the things I wanted to do tonight.

I peeled the pants from her legs and ran my hand over the silk that was still damp. I smiled. She had come hard for me. She shivered as I traced the sensitive spot between her legs.

“Did you like fucking my fingers?” I asked.

Her eyes widened and she licked her lips. “Yes.”

“Do you like it when I fuck you with my tongue?”

She nodded. “Yes,” she whispered.

“Do you want both?”

She stared at me, biting her lower lip. “I do.”

I grinned. I didn’t waste any more time. I was going to get her out of my head. And the only way to do that was to fuck her every way possible. I’d taste her. Bite her. Fuck her until she was screaming my name.

I ran my hands over her hips and rolled her black lace thong off over her thighs and to the floor. I dug my fingers into her skin, making my way up her sides until I had a good tug on her bra. She raised her hands in the air so I could pull it over her head.

She stood in front of me, one gloriously naked Goddess. I pulled my T-shirt off.

She walked toward me, pressing her pointed tits against my chest. I groaned as she wrapped her hands around my neck, drawing me toward her for a kiss. My cock grew hard when her tongue slipped inside my mouth, rolling and twisting with perfection.

“Fuck, Natalia,” I growled.

My hands tangled in her hair. I wanted to own and possess her. I wanted to be with her and hold her. I wanted all of her at once, but to take my time exploring her body again as if it were the first time. Every sense I had was heightened with her in my arms.

“Will you crawl on the bed for me?” I asked.

She stepped back hesitantly. I thought she was going to protest, but she positioned one hand and then the other before taking both knees to the mattress. My palms smoothed over her ass, reveling in the firmness of her skin. She wiggled slightly as my hands traveled in circles until finally, I was at my piece of paradise. And that was what it was—mine.

She lowered herself to her forearms, hiking her ass in the air for me. God, what she did for me was unbelievable. I pried her folds and she rocked back. I could see how swollen her clit was and I wanted it between my teeth more than anything. I had promised her my fingers and tongue and I wasn’t going to break that promise. I pushed one finger inside as my tongue slid between her legs. She let out a long sigh and my cock twitched.

“Feels good?” I asked.

“God, yes.” She moved with my finger and clenched tighter every time my tongue whipped over her clit.

I sucked at her entrance before my tongue twirled inside. She sank her hips, trying to pull me inside. She offered herself to me, spreading her legs wider, lifting her hips.

She pressed forward on the mattress and I wanted to take her from behind, but I wanted to see her hover over me too. Her ass was fucking beautiful. Every part of her body was gorgeous. I rolled her nipple between my fingers and she groaned at the impact.

I licked between her legs and kissed her spine, crawling over her. I rolled on to my back.

She leaned down and kissed me, sinking her tongue deep in my mouth. I loved that she wanted to taste herself on my lips. It was hot as shit.

I shoved my pants off my hips and kicked them to the floor, freeing my cock.

“Sam,” she whispered.

“Yeah, baby?” I looked into her eyes.

“I want to ride you.”

I grinned. We were on the exact same page.

She finished. “Backward.”

My cock almost lost it then. I felt the head surge with pressure. Holy shit.

“Hold on.” I hustled to the end of the bed and fished through my jeans pockets until I found the pack of condoms I had brought with me. I broke the seal on the packet, rolled it on in record time and settled on the mattress.

“Fuck me, Natalia.”

She straddled me, facing away from me, and I pressed my erection between her legs. I watched her perfect round ass as she sank on my dick, sucking it inside her.

I groaned as she tilted her hips forward and back with a precise erotic movement.

“Fuck,” I groaned. I’d never felt like I’d come this soon. I’d always been able to hold out, but she was hitting the head of my dick at the right spot and watching her from behind like this did things to me I didn’t know were possible.

She rose up again and lowered herself over me. I couldn’t take it. It wasn’t ending like this. I lifted her off of me and maneuvered her graceful body to the pillows.

“What?” she asked.

“You’re so fucking dirty,” I growled, taking her lips with a forceful kiss. She wrapped her legs around my waist and I plunged inside her, feeling her stretch around my cock.

It didn’t matter what position we were in. Everything about her felt fucking amazing. She was hot and wet and so tight I wanted to stay buried inside her all night. I pumped in and out, kissing her, staring into her eyes, listening to the sounds of her rapid breath, threading my fingers through hers and doing it all over again. I never wanted to stop fucking her.

Never.

18

Natalia

I looked into Sam’s eyes and felt him fill me with his solid cock. I loved it. The way he made me feel. The way my body vibrated under him. The way I wanted to try new things with him. He hilted himself inside me and I parted my lips as he shoved his thumb into my mouth. I began to suck furiously, feeling the coiling start to take off inside me.

He grinned, watching me come undone. But I couldn’t stop sucking or clenching around his cock. He drove his shaft inside and I shattered, screaming his name.

“Sam! Oh God, please, please.” He scooped his arms under me and pulled me to his damp chest while I shivered from my toes with the sensations sweeping through me. He was buried deep inside me.

I realized I was the only one who came and looked at his wicked smile. We were both upright and I could ride him, sliding up and down over his cock.

“Oh, yeah,” he coaxed me.

My nipples rubbed against the solid planes of his chest and the friction was enough to make me come again. Every nerve in my body felt alive and exposed. I leaned into a slight backbend using my hands to support me when his mouth dove toward my breast. He licked and lapped at it.

“Did I tell you you have the most perfect tits?”

“No,” I moaned. I was going under again.

His teeth nipped at one and then the other. It was a delicious pain that ran a shock of electricity from my nipples to my core every time I felt his teeth.

“Did I tell you last time how much I love hearing dirty French on your sexy lips?”

I shook my head. “You mean when I say baise-moi?” I smiled wickedly.

He pulled me forward into a kiss and I moaned at the taste of his lips.

“I don’t want this to stop,” I whispered. I moved up and down, driving him wild. But I could tell he was holding back.

“It doesn’t have to.”

I pressed down on his shoulders, keeping the tip of his erection at my entrance, then sank down swiftly.

“Fuck, Natalia.” He yanked at my hair and I smiled.

“I want to make you come too. And then do it all over again.”

“We want the same thing.” He bit at my lip.

I hadn’t thought past tonight or past the few hours together, but I knew this wasn’t going to be the fix we promised each other would cure the problem we had. No, this was only feeding a hungry monster. I wanted him more. I wanted him again. I wanted him tomorrow and next week. Tonight wasn’t going to be enough. One more time would never be enough.

I wondered if we did want the same thing. Did he want more than tonight? Or was this going to be enough for him? Would he get me out of his head like he mentioned and go back to playing a game every Sunday that paid him millions of dollars? Was I the distraction or the cure?

He amazed me with his strength. His hands landed on my waist and he lifted me on to the bed. Before I could adjust myself or get my bearings, he rolled me to my stomach. He surprised me again when instead of bringing to my knees, he lifted my hips enough to slide his cock to my entrance.

I groaned when he pushed inside and I felt his lips on my ear. His fingers entwined mine and our hips moved together, pulling and pushing, grasping and clinging, until we were on the same cliff, taking the same dive into a pool of ecstasy. It fell over us like rain. Sam pinned me to the bed while he pulsed inside me with strong thrusts, and my orgasm scattered through my limbs. He sucked at my earlobe and growled with satisfaction until his breathing became normal again. He slowly rolled from my back and pulled me to his chest.

I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know if there were words.

But Sam broke the silence for me.

“I have to see you again.”

And that was when I realized we were never going to give this up.

***

We sat facing each other on the bed, eating a tray of room service. Sam dipped a strawberry in whipped cream and dotted it on my nipple before taking a swipe with his tongue.

“Tastes so much better on your tits,” he explained.

I swatted at him. But it felt amazing when his tongue was on my breasts.

“We’re trying to figure this out,” I reminded him.

“Right.”

I picked at a waffle on another plate and took a bite. Breakfast food in the middle of the night was the best.

“If I’m caught with you, I lose my job and am no longer on the Warriors payroll.”

“We’ve covered that.”

I looked at him. “But you don’t seem to care, since you make a million dollars and I barely make forty-thousand a year.”

“Then let me pay you.”

My eyes widened. “Like a hooker?”

“Okay, bad idea.”

“Very.”

He picked up a piece of bacon. “And you can’t get another job?”

“Can you?”

“It’s different. I’m in my dream job. And you aren’t.”

I lowered my eyes. “But I will be again. I need to make it to March when I can audition for the troupe again.”

“Darlin’, it’s October.”

“We can do this for six months, right?” I fidgeted with the waffle. I didn’t want to tell him I was financially strapped and I wasn’t going to beg my family for money. That wasn’t an option for me. I could make it on my own dancing.

Besides, the last month had been more fun than the entire summer of training. I was starting to see why the other girls loved it so much.

“Sneak around? Pretend we’re not sleeping together?”

I nodded. “Yes, exactly that.”

He laughed. “I’d rather not. I want you when I want you, and this is fucking inconvenient.”

“It’s not going to be convenient ever.” I realized this was going to be a disaster. We couldn’t have an actual relationship.

“Why do you say that?”

“Because you’re always going to be a Wrangler. And that means practice, games, and press events.”

“So?”

“So, I’m going back to the ballet and that means performances, traveling, and practices as well. We won’t ever be in the same city. Maybe we should agree that tonight is the last time.” I felt a lump in my throat.

“Hell, no. I don’t give up that easily.”

“It’s not giving up. It’s being practical, Sam. A ballerina and a football player? This isn’t a movie. It’s not going to work. The sex might be amazing, but what do we have when the sex is over?”

He sat forward. “That’s the part we figure out together.”

I didn’t expect that answer. “What?”

He ran his finger through the bowl of whipped cream and coated my nipples. They hardened under his touch.

“Sam… this isn’t going to solve our problem.”

But my head reeled back as his lips sealed over one nipple and sucked before clamping onto the other one, licking them clean of the whipped cream.

He reached for the bowl a second time, and slathered my entire breasts. I laid back on the sheets as he licked and sucked.

“Sam,” I whimpered.

“You feel it, don’t you?” He studied my eyes.

I nodded.

My breasts were sticky from the whipped cream, but my skin glowed with anticipation for what he’d do next.

“Then we’ll figure it out,” he explained. He hovered over me and I had a hard time imagining I could tell him no. But there was no logic to this. How could we possibly work?

“But…”

“Shh.” He pressed a finger to my lips. “You have to leave in an hour and I want to fuck you so you know there will be a next time.”

“I want a next time.”

“Me too.”

“Sam?”

“Hmm?”

His hands slid over my slit and I sighed. “That position earlier.”

“The one on your stomach?” He flicked over my clit and I jerked.

“Yes, that one.” I breathed. “I’d never tried it before.”

He pushed my knees to the side and settled over me. “It’s called the dragon, baby.”

Holy hell. I looked at the dragon emblazoned on his arm and wanted to ask the most obvious question, but I pulled him toward me as my legs fell open and he plunged deep inside me. I bowed off the bed.

We had an hour together, and suddenly I knew what Sam meant by proving there was a next time.

19

Sam

I held her against my chest. I didn’t want to let her walk out of the door.

“I’ll call you when we get back to Austin.”

I kissed her lips, drinking in the sweetness I was now addicted to. “Good.”

“I have to go or Heather is going to get suspicious.” She tried to free herself, but I refused to let go. “She already knows about what happened between us last time.”

“Five more minutes,” I pleaded.

She laughed. “No, you had your five more minutes already.”

True. She had given me a fucking awesome blowjob. She said it was a parting gift.

“I like that kind of five minutes. I want another one.”

“Really, I have to get back to the room. I need a couple hours of sleep before the photo shoot too.”

I let my hands fall to my sides so she could walk out of my arms, but she stayed another second looking into my eyes.

“This is crazy,” she said.

I shrugged. “Crazy is what we did the last few hours. Wanting to keep doing it isn’t crazy at all.”

She shoved me.

I laughed. She was adventurous in bed and I fucking loved it. Talking about it, however, didn’t seem to be her strong suit.

“I’ll see you this week.”

She looked up. “I still think it’s going to be a bad idea to see each other.”

“It’s a ninety-minute drive. I will be there. We just have to figure out our schedules. We can do this, Natalia.”

“But the Warriors have a home game and then we travel the next week to the DC Sharks.

“Damn, I forgot they played the Sharks next week. I mean, you play the Sharks.”

It was going to take some getting used to that I was seeing a girl who worked for the Warriors. She wasn’t completely wrong about the implications it would have for us. My job wasn’t at stake, but I didn’t think it would go over well with the fans if they knew I was hooking up with a Goddess. I was trying to ignore all that noise and focus on her. On us. On what I needed to get through this season. She was what I needed.

“Yes, and we have another road game the next week. I’m basically gone half of October.”

I took her by the shoulders. “Don’t worry. I will see you this week.”

She chewed her lower lip. “I want that more than anything. I do.”

“Then don’t say anything else. I’ll make it happen. Now get back to your room, before the tattletale rats you out.”

She reached up on her toes to kiss me. “Bye.”

“Bye.”

I closed the door behind her and walked back to the bed. It was covered in whipped cream and smelled like us, but I fell on top of it and slept for hours.

***

That same day I checked out of the suite around noon. My phone had been blowing up. The team was pissed I missed the Dean. I was going to have to come up with some story that didn’t include Natalia.

No one would believe I’d turn down the kind of girls at that party for one of my own. It didn’t work like that. At the very least, I probably should have shown up for a few minutes. But after the game, instead of getting ready for the Dean, I tracked down the Goddesses’ hotel.

And when the elevator doors opened and I saw Natalia, there was no way I was headed to a different party. She was all the party I needed.

I pulled my hoodie over my head and found my car in the garage under the hotel. I had meant every word I said to her in the doorway. I was headed to Austin this week. I would see her and we would figure this out.

I had let her get away once before and I wasn’t going to let it happen again.

20

Natalia

It must have been the post-sex glow, but everyone kept asking me what new skin care products I used for the photo shoot.

I laughed them off. “I’ve been drinking a ton of water,” I explained.

Heather eyed me. She was next to me in the row. We were standing on a bridge over the river. “Really?”

“Really,” I responded.

“Nothing else?”

“Nope.” I smiled at the camera. God, I couldn’t remember being this happy. Every part of me felt light and airy. It was strange and unique. It reminded me of how I used to feel on stage. That feeling of euphoria as the prima ballerina.

The photographer asked us to pose for a few more shots and then he called it a wrap. I jogged down the stairs. Heather was on my heels.

“I didn’t hear you come in last night,” she snickered.

She was already at breakfast when I snuck into the room.

“I stayed out longer than I thought—you know, catching up.” I twisted the cap off a bottle of water. This would help with my water story.

“Catching up with your cousin?”

I nodded. “Yep, with my cousin.”

“Hope you had a good time.”

I grinned. “I did. It was amazing.”

There was no way anyone saw Sam and me together. I wasn’t worried there was evidence, but it didn’t mean Heather wasn’t suspicious. And she would keep poking and prodding until she was satisfied.

The same thing had happened at training camp with another one of the new girls. As the captain, Heather felt compelled to know where we were at all times. One girl was constantly late to practice and her excuses piled up. One morning she blamed a faulty hair dryer. Another day she said she lost her shoes. By the third morning, Heather started tailing her and found out she was sneaking her boyfriend into our squad rooms for the night and seeing him off again in the morning. That girl was released from the team and replaced with someone on the waiting list.

“Sorry I missed movie night with you. But my cousin popped in and it couldn’t be helped.”

“Of course not. We’ll do it another time.” She waved her hand in the air. “It’s fine.”

But there was something gnawing at me that said it wasn’t fine. I didn’t know whether she was upset I blew her off for my imaginary cousin, or if she had a theory my cousin was Sam.

***

I turned the lights on in my apartment and looked around. I had been gone a day, but it felt different. I felt different. I reached into my bag and pulled out my phone. Sam’s number was at the top. I hit send and waited for him to answer.

“Hey, gorgeous.”

I smiled and felt the giddiness of butterflies in my belly. I missed him already.

“I’m home.”

“That’s too bad. I wish you were still in San Antonio.”

“Me too,” I whispered. I sat on the couch.

“I was thinking I could drive up Friday after practice. We don’t practice on Saturdays and we have a home game Sunday. I can make it back to San Antonio with plenty of time.”

“That could work. But I do have practice Saturday morning.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll keep your bed warm for you until you get back.”

I felt the stirring sensation in my core. Holy hell. I hadn’t thought what it would be like to have Sam here in my apartment, or in my bed. Suddenly Friday seemed like an eternity.

“Promise?”

“I do.”

I smiled. I could get used to this. Sexy conversations on the phone. Torrid nights that no one knew about. There was a thrill to the secrecy that I was starting to like.

“What are you going to do for the rest of the night?” I asked. I didn’t know much about Sam’s life other than he played football.

“Probably watch footage for the Sunday game.”

“Oh.” Maybe there wasn’t more to him than football. I felt a slight sinking feeling.

“And probably make some dinner.”

“Do you cook?”

“Yes, I cook. Do you cook?”

“No. I’m the worst cook.” I ate cereal and salads. Anything with more directions and I would burn it.

“Then good thing you met me. I’m basically a chef. Should have gone to culinary school.”

“Why didn’t you?”

He chuckled. “There’s not as much money in whipping up a mean pasta as there is in catching a leather ball.”

“I keep forgetting.”

“I like that you forget. You don’t give a shit I play football, do you?”

I shook my head. “Not at all.”

“And you know I don’t care you’re on a dance team, right?”

“I do know that.”

“Good, because it doesn’t matter to me. But I was thinking about something today after you left.”

“What’s that?” I asked.

“I want to see you dance.”

“You’ve seen me.”

“No, not like that. The way you love dance. I want to see the ballerina Natalia.”

He took my breath away. I had old dance videos and piles of audition DVDs, but that wasn’t what he was talking about.

“You really want to see me dance?”

“Yeah, I bet you’re beautiful out there.”

And I knew he didn’t mean the same way as when I was a Goddess, shaking my ass for everyone to see.

“I’ll dance for you.”

I was already choreographing something in my head to show him.

“I have to go pick up the film for tonight. But I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Okay.”

“Good night, Natalia.”

“Good night.”

I hung up and stared at the phone. I had no idea this was going to happen, but I felt as if we had officially waltzed right into a relationship.

21

Sam

The drive to Austin wasn’t bad. It gave me ninety minutes to crank up the music and drive. Texas roads were wide and the speed limit let me go almost as fast as I wanted.

There were a lot of things to think about other than the lyrics blaring from my speakers. Two nights with this woman and I had decided to break my first rule of the season. But it seemed better this way. Since Sunday night, I’d had incredible practices all week. I hadn’t dropped a single ball or missed any tackles. Even Wes commented on my concentration.

With Natalia in my life, I wasn’t as distracted. I wasn’t thinking about where she could be, or what she was doing. All I had to do was pick up the damn phone and call her. It was as if being with her had calmed everything down again. She was some kind of drug for me. I got my focus back. I was the player I was before I met her. Only this time, I had her in my life.

Natalia had texted her address to me. She lived in an apartment not far from where we met over a month ago. I recognized the neighborhood when I pulled into her parking garage.

***

I knocked on the shabby door and waited for her to answer.

I held up a bouquet of flowers. “These are for you.”

She reached on her tiptoes to kiss me, but stopped and pulled me inside. She took the flowers from me. “Sorry, I don’t want anyone to see you.”

I didn’t care. I grabbed her by the waist and pulled her into my arms, crushing her with an earth-shattering kiss.

She trembled and I felt the satisfaction rumble through me. “I like your place.” I looked around. It had the definite markings of a girl. There were pastels and black and white photos of dancers on the wall.

“Thanks, I can give you the quick tour.” She smiled. “This, of course, is the kitchen where I spend almost no time. This is the living room where I spend a little time.” I followed her. “This is the bedroom where I sleep.” Everything was white and clean.

“And what’s this, the guestroom?” I pushed open the door beside her room and stared.

Natalia was behind me. “No, it’s my studio.” She adjusted the dimmer switch and a chandelier hanging from the ceiling illuminated the space.

There was an entire wall of mirrors and a barre that ran the length of one wall.

“It didn’t come like this, did it?”

She laughed. “No, of course not. I had permission to have the mirrors and the barre installed for my practice.”

Other than an old record player and a crate of records on the far side, the room was empty. The floors were smooth and soft.

“You dance in here?”

“I used to. I haven’t tried much since I was injured. But I do a lot of stretching, and it’s a great workout room.”

“What kind of music do you play on that thing?” I pointed to the turntable.

“Mostly classical.” She walked to the stack of albums in the crate and flipped through them and retrieved one from the center.

“Where did you get it?” I streamed all my music. I didn’t have a CD player.

“It was a gift from my ballet teacher when I left Paris.” She sounded sad. “She gave me all her records and the turntable.” She was smiling, but it was at a distant memory, not at me. “Sometimes I come in here and listen. I remember the dances.”

“Like what?” I asked. I had this need to connect with her. To bring her back to where we were. I wanted her to leave those Paris memories and remember I was standing in front of her.

“Stuff like this.” She placed the vinyl record on the player and moved the arm for the music to begin. I heard a violin and a piano, but all I saw was her. Her long, graceful legs. The beauty of her breasts. The fact that there were two of her in this room with those mirrors. My cock twitched.

I reached for the dimmer, lowering the lights on the shimmering chandelier.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“I want you to take your clothes off.” I was ready to strip her bare myself if she didn’t start shedding the tank top and shorts.

But she lifted her arms, pulling her shirt overhead, and with a quick snap, her bra skidded over her arms. Her fingers landed on her hips and she shrugged the shorts over her legs and stepped away from the small pile of clothes.

I reached for her, pulling her into my arms with a hungry kiss. She moaned as my tongue slipped in her mouth. I moved back, yanking my shirt off and kicking my pants out of the way.

We stood in front of each other naked. I led her to the barre and spun her to face our reflection. I kissed the side of her neck as my hands traveled over her breasts. I stopped to roll her nipple between my fingers as my other hand coasted over her stomach and plunged between her legs.

“Oh, God.” She leaned into my chest, jutting her hips forward so I could slide between her slit.

“Watch,” I told her. “Watch all of it. Watch when you come. Watch me fuck you right here.”

I felt the heat between her legs as my fingers massaged her clit. “Yes,” she breathed. Her legs buckled slightly as I spread her opening.

I’d never been so fucking turned on in my life. I nudged my cock against her ass. As she rocked into my fingers, she lifted on her toes, then lowered to her bare feet. I felt her sliding her clit against my fingertips as she moved up and down, then slowly, her hips eased backward with each rise and fall until her arms were stretched forward on the barre and her soaking wet entrance was mine to take.

I pushed my cock enough to stretch over her.

“Ohh,” she whimpered.

“Nice position,” I growled over her back, admiring her curves. She wiggled closer and I knew she wanted this as badly as I did.

I rubbed the head over her clit, coating her juices over me. She felt so warm I wanted to get lost inside her. I wanted to fill her. I wanted to fuck her for the rest of the night as if it was our first night together.

I looked at her in the mirror. Her tits dangled in front and I reached for them, plucking each one until she whimpered.

“Watch me fuck you, Natalia.”

Her head jerked up as I positioned myself and drove inside her with a shudder that ripped through my body.

We both groaned at the intensity of the angle. She held the barre while I pumped in and out of her from behind. Watching her eyes, her nipples, her slice of paradise, dripping wet from wanting me.

I looked down. My hands gripped her just above her round ass. I could see every time my shaft withdrew, then was lost inside her again. I fucking loved it. I could watch this all night.

Nothing had felt like this. Nothing was this fucking hot. Her hands slapped the mirror as I reared back and thrust with sudden force, pushing her forward.

“Sam, it’s so intense. I have to come. Please let me. Please.”

I wanted to give her everything she wanted. And if she wanted to come on my dick, she was going to come hard.

I reached in front of her and began to flick over her clit with my fingers, feeling her squeeze my cock with powerful strength.

“Oh yes,” she screamed. “Yes, like that.” Her hips moved wildly and I knew we had both lost control.

“You’re mine, Natalia. I’m not stopping. You’re mine.”

I was going to come inside her and I couldn’t stop it. There was no time to grab a condom or pull out. I wasn’t going to do that. I needed to fill her and make her mine. I buried myself with a final thrust as we came together, gasping for air, clinging for balance. I watched in the mirror as her eyes burned into mine.

I unleashed everything I had inside her, feeling my belly relax as the orgasm pumped through my limbs. I slid my dick from her and kissed her back, which was damp with sweat.

“You are so fucking amazing.” I twirled her into my arms, crushing her lips against mine.

“I’ve never done that,” she whispered. “But God I’ve wanted to.”

I laughed. “We can do that as many times as you want.”

Her palms locked around my neck. “Welcome back to Austin.” She reached up to kiss me and I took her lips.

22

Natalia

“The shower is ready,” I called out to the living room. Sam was on the phone. He looked annoyed. I hadn’t seen that kind of scowl on his face before.

“Sorry,” I mouthed. I pointed to the bathroom door so he would know I was going to jump in.

I couldn’t help but pause when I heard him say, “Don’t ever call me again. I mean it.” I strained my ears in his direction. It was none of my business, but I’d never heard him sound so angry before.

“I told you. I’m not going to do it. I don’t care what happened or why,” he seethed.

I felt guilty for listening much longer. Maybe it was a reporter begging for a story about him. I had a feeling it was more personal than that. Maybe it was the anger in his tone, or the way he was trying to shield the call from me. I tiptoed away and headed for the bathroom, trying to focus on what we had shared.

I’d had a dozen fantasies about the mirrors in my studio. They mostly came to me in the middle of the night when I was asleep, and would rouse me with wicked thirst for something I knew I couldn’t have. Until now.

Watching Sam’s eyes as our bodies aligned. As he moved inside me. It sent a shiver through my body. I was still tingling. It was erotic. It was the hottest thing I’d ever done in my life. Each time we were together topped the last time. Not that it was a contest. I didn’t want to have to out-best our sex life. But holy hell, it was amazing.

I stepped into the shower and let the water wash over me. We hadn’t had the safe sex discussion either, but as I soaped up, I was reminded we hadn’t used a condom. I was on birth control, but that didn’t mean I wasn’t sleeping with an AFA player.

When was the right time to have this discussion? Probably before I let him come inside me. I turned the water up, making the steam rise over the glass door.

Sam walked in. “Sorry, I had to take that.”

“Everything okay?” I asked.

“I don’t want to talk about it. Actually, I want to forget that call ever happened,” he grumbled.

I didn’t know what to say. His face was drawn in a frustrated expression. Whoever was on the end of that call had upset him.

“You sure? I’m a really good listener,” I offered.

He opened the door and stepped in next to me. His palms slid to the side of my face and he kissed me. “I’m sure. I don’t want to talk about it. Let’s pretend I never took that call.” He went back to kissing me.

I could get lost in this. His kiss. His touch. The way he looked at me. It was everything out of a beautiful ballet. Although the leading men weren’t anything like Sam. I was used to lithe and limber. Not strong and powerful. He could encompass me and make me feel safe and secure. And I was sure if he gave it a try, he could lift me overhead easily and I could dive into a poisson, one of my favorite holds with a partner. I smiled thinking about it.

“What’s that look?” he asked.

“Just thinking about you dancing.”

He chuckled. “My best dance is in the end zone.”

“When should we order dinner?” I asked.

The water skimmed over his shoulders and I watched the droplets roll over the muscles in his biceps.

“After the shower sex.” He grinned. His mouth moved over mine as my back touched the cool tile.

His erection pressed hard against my leg and I gasped. Was this really happening again? His hands lifted me up gently as I wrapped myself around his waist. The steam billowed around us and I felt the heat between us as he slid me over him until finally he pushed inside. I let out a moan as he filled me.

He rested one hand over my shoulder on the tile while the other clutched my lower back. And when I least expected it, he started to sway. I smiled at him, feeling our bodies move in opposite directions.

“I like that.” It was as if he was rotating inside me, touching everything within.

“You feel fucking incredible. Every time.” He nipped at my neck.

Part of me wondered if this was always what sex was like for him, and the other part knew it couldn’t be. It had never felt like this. Never felt like someone wanted me so desperately, or that I needed them just as much. I held on while he brought us to the brink of ecstasy. This time he pushed in and out with slow strokes. But strokes that tortured me with pleasure.

“Sam, oh, Sam.” It was happening slower than it ever had. The coiling in my belly started to expand and float through my limbs, but not with the fire and intensity I was used to with him. It was exquisite how everything slowed to his rhythm.

I kissed him as my body began to shake and jolt. My legs felt like jelly and my core was burning with the blistering orgasm.

He pressed his forehead against mine. “I love it when you do that.”

I licked my lips from the shower water. I touched the corners of his face as the trickles of water beaded over the sharp lines of his jaw.

Then I saw the lust in his eyes. His speed picked up and a look of determination crossed his gorgeous face. I held up while he pumped in and out of me. His chest heaved rapidly and his hips thrust forward.

“Fuck, Natalia.” He sank into me again and his body stiffened as he wrapped both arms around me, shaking as his came inside.

Slowly, he lowered me to the ground. I looked into his eyes, already missing our bodies being connected.

“You said something about dinner?” he joked.

“Funny.” I grabbed a bottle of body wash for him.

“I’m starving. The practice. The drive. The sex.”

“Poor thing.” I lathered my hands and began rubbing them over his chest. His shoulders were wide and I needed two hands to wash one arm.

He was a lot to handle.

***

We decided on ordering Italian and sat in the living room once the driver dropped off our dinner. I lit a few candles and opened a bottle of wine. I poured a glass for each of us.

“I think we should toast to something, don’t you?”

Sam held the glass. “To more nights in your studio.” He winked.

I tapped my glass to his.

“I want to hear more about your audition. When is it?” he asked.

“For the ballet?” I picked up my fork.

“Yes. When do you start preparing? Are you ready?”

“It’s not until March. And I hope that by January my leg will be strong enough that I can complete my routine.” I took a bite of salad.

“What did you injure? Maybe I could help.” He waggled his eyebrows and I didn’t know whether to take him seriously or not.

“It’s my hamstring. It’s not bad enough that I can’t jump around for a few hours cheering. It’s actually gotten much stronger since last year. But I’m worried it won’t support me on my pointe shoes.”

“And those are?”

“You know the shoes ballerinas wear? The ones with the flat toes so we can stand up on our feet. It’s a lot of pressure on the foot, but it takes a tremendous amount of strength in the supporting leg. I’m afraid to try.” I couldn’t believe I had told him that. I hadn’t shared it with anyone.

“I think I know what shoes you’re talking about. Why haven’t you tried it yet if you’re out dancing for the Warriors every week? Your legs seem in good shape to me.”

I was tempted to poke him with my fork. “Because if I put on those shoes and I’m not ready then what was all this for?” I took a deep breath. “Why have I joined a dance squad? Why did I try to get my strength back if it was all going to be for nothing?”

“Hey, you don’t know that.” He put his plate on the coffee table. “You need to put the shoes on and see where you are. That’s the only way you can plan the rest of your rehab.”

I blinked. “You’re talking like you know how I’m going to get back on stage.”

“I don’t know shit about ballet, but I know injuries and I know hamstrings. Do you have a trainer? Are you working with a therapist to get you where you need to be?”

“I can’t afford it right now.” I didn’t want to admit how broke I was. The Warriors didn’t exactly pay a lot and Austin was expensive.

“Then let me help you. I can do that. I know the best physical therapists in the country. I can find someone to get you ready.”

“That’s football. This is ballet,” I stated.

“Hamstrings are hamstrings.” He picked up his wine glass and took a big gulp. “If you need help, let me help you.”

I shook my head. “I don’t know. It’s not like we’re a…”

“A couple?”

“What is this? What are we?” The questions popped out before I could pull them back in.

“Do we have to label it?”

“No, I guess not.” I reached for my glass.

“I’m not saying it’s not something. It’s just… Damn it,” he huffed. “Why can’t we see what happens?”

“We can. We definitely can.”

“This is everything I said I wouldn’t do. And I’m everything you said you can’t do. But I’m here in Austin and I’m thinking that it’s going to suck when I have to drive back to San Antonio tomorrow.”

“You are?” I felt little slivers of happiness dancing in my stomach.

“God, yes. I don’t want to leave you. I want to take you with me. Can’t you quit the Goddesses?”

“I need the paycheck, Sam. I make money doing what I’m doing. And I can’t take charity from you. I wouldn’t feel good about that. It would feel like I belonged to you or something.” I scrunched my nose.

His eyes locked on mine. “Don’t you feel like you belong to me?”

And it hit me—I did. I did every time I went to bed with him. Every time he kissed me. When I saw our reflection in the mirror, and saw my handprint on the shower wall. He owned me with his body and I gave it to him freely, willingly.

“That’s not the same.” I tried to back out of his argument.

“I haven’t thought this through, but I want you. I want you with me in San Antonio. I sure as hell don’t want you around the Warriors.”

“Because they’re your rival?”

“Yes, because they are the rival. I make more than enough to pay for a trainer and a coach and a therapist. Come to San Antonio and train.”

I couldn’t believe he was offering me this opportunity, and at the same time, I was stunned how it made me feel.

“It’s too soon. We don’t know each other well enough. I don’t want to owe you something like that, Sam.”

His gray eyes pierced through the walls I was putting up. “Come with me. Be with me. Let me do this for you.”

He took the glass from my hand and rested it on the coffee table. My heart beat wildly. His eyes dipped to my breasts. He pushed my shirt up, exposing my nipple. He bent his head to take it in his mouth.

He sucked it between his teeth and I whimpered.

“Is this mine?” he asked.

“Yes.” My head leaned back on the cushions.

He rolled the other nipple between his fingers before sucking it into his mouth. “And this, is it mine, Natalia?”

“Oh, yes.” I was already wet and the fire was burning in my core.

He let go and I felt the cool air brush over my wet skin. He left my shirt dangling around my shoulders. His lips moved over mine.

“And these lips.” He kissed me. “Are these mine or not?”

I nodded as he bit my bottom lip. All at once his hand was snaking up the back of my running shorts, squeezing my ass. I squealed. But his grip was firm and his voice was serious.

“I love your ass. Tell me it isn’t mine,” he commanded.

“It’s yours,” I whispered.

One finger and then another slid between my legs, over my slit, and tugged on my throbbing clit.

“Oh,” I moaned. “God, Sam.”

He twisted it slightly and I felt the need building. He was making his point clear.

He pushed his fingers inside me while his thumb rubbed over my swollen nub. “All of this is mine, isn’t it?”

I bit my lip. I was clenching around his fingers while they pushed inside me, curling against my walls.

“It is,” I whispered, clawing at his back.

He pulled his hands away and sat forward to pick up his wine glass. I wiggled upward and watched him.

He looked at me over his shoulder, grinning.

“I want you with me, Natalia.”

I closed my eyes. I wanted it too. He was giving me a chance to pack up and leave the Goddesses for good. But at what cost? Was I his plaything? Some dance girl he bought to get him through the season?

“Are you mine?” I asked the question bluntly.

“What?”

I could play the same games he could. I maneuvered so I was straddling him on the couch.

“You know you own me. But do I own you?” I ran a finger along his jaw and to his bare chest. I didn’t stop there. My nails scraped his sides and I dropped to the floor between his knees. He leaned back while I pulled his warm up shorts from his legs. His cock sprung free and I smiled.

I licked the tip, tasting the freshness of the shower on him. I kissed the silky skin before gliding my tongue over the sensitive spot between his balls.

“Natalia.” He shoved his cock closer to me.

I positioned my mouth over it and sucked him in as he groaned loudly.

I sat back. “Is it mine?”

“Keep going and I’ll tell you.” He reached for the back of my head, but I jerked to the side. My hand latched around his thick shaft.

“No, tell me you’re mine too, Sam. Tell me we own each other.”

I took another lick over the top of his cock, resisting the urge to suck him again. I needed an answer that would satisfy me. I would belong to him. I could admit that my body was his, but only if it was reciprocated. I needed to know he was just as much mine as I was his.

He tilted my chin upward, and pulled me into his lap. I knew from the look in his eye that he was going crazy with want. I had started and stopped something he loved.

“Yes,” he whispered.

“What?”

“This is yours,” he growled. He pried my shorts out of the way and pushed inside me. I rocked back into his arms. “I’m yours, Natalia.”

My shirt flew over my head and I gave him my breasts to suck. I pressed his head to my chest, feeling the pulse run through my body. I didn’t know what answer I was going to give him. I didn’t know if I could uproot everything I had done here, but what I did know was I was his and he was mine and it didn’t matter what teams we were on. Nothing would change that.

23

Sam

I didn’t think I’d ever say words like that again. I didn’t want to belong to someone. I didn’t want to love someone, but Natalia had upended all my plans this season, and why would this be any different? If the only way I could have her was to give her me, then that was the deal. Every part of her was mine. I made sure of that.

I didn’t drive to Austin planning on having a heavy relationship talk. I planned on spending the night fucking the most beautiful woman I’d ever met. But I ended up asking her to move in with me and offering to help her rehab. She was in my head. She was under my skin. I was drowning in her.

I watched her sleep next to me and traced a line between her shoulder blades. Her hair had fallen over her shoulder.

She told me she had to leave by seven to make it to early morning practice, but we still had a lot to discuss. I wanted her with me in San Antonio this week. One week of long-distance phone calls and a drive to see her wasn’t going to be enough.

I hated that Maddie called. I hated that she had my number. That she tried to throw me off my game for my night with Natalia. The moment I was finally happy again, she blindsided me with a desperate plea for help. Damn it.

I didn’t give a shit if she needed anything. I wasn’t her ATM, and I wasn’t her friend. It was enough to scare the hell out of me about getting involved with Natalia. But they were nothing alike. Nothing.

Natalia could never treat me the way Maddie did.

I had to fight the fear creeping under my ribs. I had to fight the thoughts to run and get out before she annihilated me. I was a different man now.

I turned off the lamp next to the bed and stretched my legs out beside her. She sighed softly and I pulled her against my chest. She fit there perfectly. This graceful, beautiful woman fit. Only I had to convince her of that tomorrow before I left. After that phone call, it seemed more important than ever. I needed her commitment. I needed her loyalty. I needed to know she was mine.

***

Natalia had been gone for two hours. I was working on making breakfast in the kitchen when my phone rang. It was Cavan.

“Hey, what’s up, man?”

“Sam, I was wondering if I could stop by and pick up one of the playbooks for tomorrow’s game. I never got one and the coordinators said you have those things memorized.”

“Yeah, but I’m out right now. It’ll have to be later.”

“Out? It’s nine o’clock in the morning.”

“Working out, man. Have to get ready for the game.” I was staring at the playbook on Natalia’s kitchen table.

“Just tell me where your spare key is and I’ll stop by.”

“Can’t. It’s in my car. I’ll call you when I’m back and you can run over.”

“This is serious. I haven’t seen any of the plays.”

I flipped the bacon over in the frying pan. “Sorry, man. Call one of the other guys or wait until I’m home.”

I was about to hang up on him.

“Fine. Just call me.”

“You got it.”

I shoved the phone into my pocket and continued to work on breakfast. I had muffins in the oven and was ready to whip eggs into omelets, but I wasn’t sure when she’d be home. I didn’t want them to be cold.

I heard her key in the door and smiled when she walked through.

“Hey.” She grinned.

“How was practice?” I asked.

“Dreadful as usual.” She hung her bag next to the door and looped her keys on a hook. “It smells wonderful in here.”

“Bacon always smells good. I was getting ready to make an omelet for you.”

She laughed. “So if I took pictures of you right now making breakfast for me I couldn’t use these as blackmail.” She leaned up to kiss me on the cheek.

“First of all, you wouldn’t do that. And second, yes, the guys don’t know about my culinary skills. So don’t blow my badass cover.”

“Oh, that’s what you call yourself?” She sat at the table to watch me with the whisk.

“You’re looking at the tight end with the most yards, most catches, most touchdowns, and most blocks in his rookie season and I’m on schedule to beat that this year.”

“Wow. I had no idea.”

I stared at her. “Really? No idea?”

She shook her head. “It was never a line. I seriously know nothing about your career or much about football, but I have picked up a lot as a Goddess. We have to go to football class during our summer training camp.”

“So if I quiz you, you think you’d pass?” I added cream to the eggs and whipped furiously. How could she not have heard of my record?

“I think I would. I can hold my own in a conversation with the girls.”

I chuckled. “Yeah, but those girls aren’t professional football players.”

“True, but I’d bet I could pass.”

“Want to make a bet?”

She twisted her pouty lips together. “What kind of bet?”

“If you win.” I stopped. “What do you want if you win?”

She pressed her finger to her chin. “I want a full-body massage. Naked.”

“That sounds like a win for me, but okay. If you win, you get a massage.”

“And if I don’t?” she asked.

“If I win, you try on those pointe shoes for me and let me watch you spin around the studio.”

The smile fell from her face. “Sam, I was trying to be funny.”

“I’m being serious. Take the bet. Prove to me you can pass a football quiz.”

“Fine. I’ll do it. And you’ll be thanking me, because your hands will be all over this body you own.” She eyed me.

“Either way I win.” I winked at her. I turned toward the stove to layer in the first omelet. “Here’s your first question. How many quarters are in a game?”

“Really? That’s insulting. Four.”

“Ding, ding, for the ballerina.” I watched to make sure the edges on the omelet didn’t brown too much. “Second question. How many players are on the field during a play?”

She scrunched her nose. “Twenty-four?”

“Err. No. Twenty-two. But that’s okay. It’s one to one.”

She folded her arms. “Next.”

I flipped the omelet over. “Okay, for your next question can you name four different offensive positions?”

“Easily. Quarterback, wide receiver, tight end,” she paused to smile. “And.” She blinked a few times. “And…”

“Err. That is incorrect. You could have said running back, kicker. I’d take lineman or center. But that’s okay. You were close.”

She scowled at me. And I felt one question away from watching her dance for me.

“For the final question. For my victory question.” I winked at her. “What is the play called a safety?”

“That is not a fair question. Who knows what that is?”

“Err, also incorrect. A safety is when the team who has the ball is tackled in their own end zone, resulting in two points for the other team.”

“Two points? I’ve never heard of it.”

“Look it up,” I instructed as I delivered her breakfast in front of her.

She started typing on her phone and whispered the definition for a safety score out loud. “I feel tricked. That was a trick question.”

“It was not. Now eat up and then put on the shoes. I want to see you dance.”

“Today?”

“I’m leaving today. So yes.”

I cut into my omelet and took a bite. Victory always tasted sweet.

24

Natalia

I stared at the satin laces dangling from the shelf, taunting me, begging me to wear them. Sam had schemed me into this and I wasn’t happy.

He was in the studio waiting for me to show him something a ballerina would do. My Goddess uniform was hanging where it always did. Didn’t he know I hadn’t been a ballerina for a long time?

I dug through my closet until I found one of my wrap shirts and a light pink wrap skirt. I quickly put them on and then began to pull the pointe shoes from the shelf. I was shaking and my fingers tingled. I didn’t know if I could go through with this.

I sat on the edge of the bed. What if it didn’t feel right? What if I injured my hamstring again? What if this was a setback? This could end all of the plans I had made to audition. With a new injury, I would ruin the chance I did have.

“Natalia, where are you?” Sam called from the room next to mine.

“Hold on,” I replied.

I had to do this. Not only because I had to pay up for the bet I had lost, but because I had been putting it off way too long. My fear had eaten away at my confidence. I could tell Sam was trying to give some of that back to me.

But he hadn’t been there. He didn’t know the pain it caused and the months of anguish piled on top.

I exhaled, and for the first time in nine months, my feet wore pointe shoes.

***

I might as well have been stepping onto the stage for my first performance. My stomach did somersaults and I could feel the sticky perspiration in my hands. I took my time walking into the studio.

Sam was going through my record collection, but he must have heard me enter and turned around.

“Wow.”

“I don’t know if I can do this.” My mouth felt dry. Wearing the shoes again had brought back not only the good memories but also the nightmare. I trembled.

He took a few long strides toward me and took my hand, leading me to the center of the room. “I know you can.”

I looked at us in the mirror. He was tall and strong, overpowering, almost, in my quiet sanctuary. He made me look dainty even though I was five-eight. He stood behind me and squeezed my shoulders.

“I’ll put on the music.”

“But what if I can’t?” I eked.

He turned. “I’ve got you. And if you can’t, we’ll figure out how to make sure you can.”

It sounded simple. It sounded as if he had figured out the perfect remedy to my problems. All I had to do was dance.

He placed a vinyl record on the turntable, moved the arm, and hit the switch. There were a few moments of crackling static before I heard the notes of the piano. I needed a moment to center myself. A moment to remember who I was as a dancer.

I felt the air fill my lungs before I started with a gentle plié. My arms swished to the sides before I moved onto my toes in a relevé. I wasn’t ready to try one leg at a time yet. I needed to work through the motions slowly. I felt the strength in my legs as I held the position on the tips of my toes and pressed into the ground with my shoes.

The more I moved, the more I started to remember the joy of dancing. The lure of the stage. The music in my ears. I stopped thinking about the accident and the pain. I let my body dictate how it floated through space.

Sam didn’t utter a word. He stood in the corner next to the record player, while I picked up my left leg and then my right. I leaned toward the bar, kicking a leg behind me, all the while maintaining my balance on my toes. It was happening. There was stability and balance. I had trust in my body again. I didn’t feel like my right leg was going to snap like a twig. Instead I felt the power in my standing leg as I moved easily from position to position.

I twirled on my toes and bowed at Sam. My heart was about to beat out of my chest, but no longer from fear—from bliss.

“What do you think?” I was practically glowing. I could see it in the mirror.

“I think you’re beautiful and you’ve never been sexier than you are right now.”

I skipped over the room and jumped into his arms, wrapping my legs around his waist. I kissed him fiercely.

“Thank you for making me lose that stupid football bet.”

He pressed my face between his palms. “I’m happy for you. How’s your leg?”

I lowered myself to the ground and pressed my right toes into the floor. “It feels fine. I can’t believe it feels okay.” I was still stunned.

“Whether you like it or not, all that ass shaking you do with the Goddesses has probably been more therapy than you realized. You have a tight little ass and that means strong hamstrings.”

“I think that’s a compliment.” I smiled slyly at him. He never let me forget how much he enjoyed my body.

“It is most definitely a compliment.”

I pulled on his hand. “Now it’s your turn.”

“Oh no.” His eyes widened with fear. “I don’t dance.”

“Really? Aren’t you the ring leader of the club scene?”

“Have you been cyber stalking me?” He eyed me.

I pinched my fingers together. “Maybe a little bit.”

“That doesn’t mean I dance. It means I party. There’s a difference.”

I wasn’t giving up that easily. The adrenaline was flowing through me. “Dance with me, Sam. Not ballet. But hold me. Dance with me.”

I could see the defeat as his shoulders sagged. “There are no cameras in this studio, are there?”

“No, of course not.”

I placed my hands around his neck as he slipped his palms to the small of my back.

“See? Not so bad.” I ran my hand over his shoulder and the width of his bicep, pulling his grip on my hip so that we were holding hands. I clutched our joined palms at my breast.

The steps were small and the movements were easy, but we moved together with as much perfection as we did in bed. He didn’t give himself credit for how athletic he was. He wouldn’t be able to dive and avoid tackles without agility and the skill of staying light on his toes. I wasn’t going to present it to him like that, but he had his own style of grace.

I pressed up into another relevé, adding several inches to my height. I didn’t say a word as he lifted me from the ground and brought my lips to his as he continued to elevate me into the air. His arms flexed and I looked down into his eyes.

He lowered me slowly, dragging my body over his. I closed my eyes, taking in the solidness of him as I slid to the floor.

“Natalia, come back with me,” he whispered.

The moment felt magical and enchanted. Almost as if we were rehearsing a lovers scene for the stage.

“Can I think about it?” I asked. “Please.”

He pressed his forehead to mine and I heard the vinyl crackle in between songs.

“Don’t wait too long to answer.”

“I won’t.”

He kissed me gently and walked out of the room. “I have to get back to San Antonio.”

There was a giant hollowness in my chest. I didn’t want him to leave, but I didn’t think I was the kind of girl who could go.

25

Sam

I had just enough time to make it back for the afternoon team meeting. I would drive straight to the stadium. I turned up the radio, but I couldn’t stop thinking about her. The more time I spent with her, the more I wanted her. I wanted her with me all the time. Not just for quick nights here and there.

She had to understand that if I needed her in San Antonio, she had to be there.

Ninety minutes later, I parked in my spot underneath the stadium and took the elevator to the strategy floor. I could hear the low murmur of the other guys. I took a seat mid-way down the aisle in one of the auditorium-style seats.

Coach Howell was going through plays with the offensive and defensive coordinators. They weren’t ready to start the meeting yet. I yawned, but jumped when I felt my phone vibrate. It was a text from Natalia.

Call me when you can.

Starting pre-game meeting. It will be a couple of hours.

Ok.

I wanted to write something about last night, or even about this morning. How fucking sexy she was. How she had stolen my breath with only a few spins in her special ballerina shoes.

I looked down when my phone vibrated. I smiled, hoping Natalia had sent me something in French. I loved it when she said something dirty. Something I’d never heard before or imagined.

I read the text in disbelief.

Can’t we at least talk? Meet for coffee?

Shit. It was Maddie again. I had to find a way to block her or I’d get a new number. It would be a pain in the ass, but it would be worth it not to have her contact me. Why was she doing this? Why was I suddenly her life line? I didn’t buy it.

No.

I wrote back. I turned my phone off. I wouldn’t respond to anything else. That was the last word she’d hear from me. I’d been done with her for years. She was the bitch who had cut me out. Now I’d be the dick who did the same thing.

The lights lowered and the film began to run.

Coach spoke into the microphone. “Guys, pay attention to this. It’s a play they ran last week. It worked, so we can expect to see it tomorrow.”

He got our attention and the room went silent. Everyone focused on the film. Everyone except me. All I could think about was a ballerina who was in my head.

Two hours later, I ran out of the meeting with the phone to my ear.

“Hey, you made it back okay?” Her voice sounded sweet.

“I drove straight to practice.” I walked to the end of the hallway where I could talk to her privately.

“Good. I’m glad you made it back.”

“What’s going on?”

She sighed. “I want to tell you yes, but I think we’re moving too quickly.”

I slammed my palm against my forehead. “It doesn’t feel like it’s too fast when we’re together, does it?”

“No, it doesn’t. And I think that’s what scares me the most about it, Sam. Is this even real?”

I stared out the window at the indoor practice field. “It’s real for me. I’ve never asked someone to move in with me before. I want you here.” I could feel the tension gripping in my neck.

“I want to be there too, but I think we should try things like this for a while. Can we do that? Plan weekends? I’ll come see you next time. Or we can meet in the middle?”

“The middle? There’s nothing in the middle.” I was pissed, and my voice was getting louder.

“Okay, as soon as you left I started looking up some places and I found these cute cottages on Canyon Lake. We could rent one and no one would see us and we could spend time together.”

I huffed. “This is a fucking first.”

“Excuse me?”

“Most women want to be photographed and seen with me and you’re the exact opposite.”

“Sam, I tried to explain to you how important it is that I do this on my own. I don’t want a handout. If you can’t respect that I don’t want your money, then maybe this isn’t even worth trying.”

I closed my eyes. I didn’t want to fight with her. I didn’t want to push her away.

“I’m sorry, Natalia. I’m tired and it was a long meeting. I didn’t mean it like that. I’m sorry.”

There was silence on the other end.

“Natalia?”

“Yeah. I was thinking.” Her voice was soft. “I’ll let you go and we can talk after our games tomorrow. Just think about it, Sam. I want to see you again, but if you can’t handle me staying on the dance team, then you need to let me know. I made a commitment to the Goddesses and I’m going to keep it.”

I saw Wes walking toward me. This was the last thing I wanted him to hear.

“Right. Right. Yeah, let’s talk tomorrow.” I hung up to face the quarterback.

“You ran out of there like your ass was on fire.” He eyed me.

“Something back home,” I lied. “What’s up?”

“I wanted to talk to you about a couple of the plays we have lined up for tomorrow. Howell, as usual, is a dumbass.”

I scratched the back of my head. I wasn’t going to get in the middle of Coach and Wes’s on-going argument about who should decide the game plays. Some teams were dependent on the quarterback and some relied on a team of coordinators to decide. Coach Howell liked to be the one in charge and so did Wes.

“What are you thinking?” I asked.

“What I think is, we use the same shit we did against the Warriors. Start off with an even rotation and then I go to you straight every time.”

My face lit up. “I like how you think.” There was nothing Coach could do if I ran the route that was called to me on the field. At that point I was only doing my job.

“Good. Then expect to make a lot of catches and let’s run that score up.”

I laughed. “Fuck, yeah. Let’s do it all afternoon.”

My argument with Natalia didn’t seem as important. I remembered I was here to win football games and collect a two-million dollar bonus in a few months.

I walked down the hall for the elevator when I heard Cavan calling my name.

“Hey, you didn’t call me about the playbook.” He stopped me at the elevator.

“Right. It’s in my car if you want it.”

“I checked around and no one else has one. I’ll take yours if you’re sure.”

“Yeah. It’s yours. Come on.”

We rode the elevator to the garage level. Cavan followed behind me. He was having a pretty good season. I was impressed another rookie could join the team and do what he had with the pressure weighing down on us to repeat our championship victory.

I pulled the binder out of the trunk and handed it to him.

“Thanks, man. I appreciate it.”

“No problem.”

I knew how he felt. I remembered what it was like when everyone around you had the plays memorized and you were still trying to get to know the names of a hundred different guys and staff members. He was in a new city with a new job. There were a lot of adjustments to make. But he seemed to be the kind of guy who was handling it in stride. Maybe better than I had.

I needed to get home, shower, and study the game notes for tomorrow. I hopped behind the wheel and steered toward my apartment.

***

I turned the shower off and grabbed the towel on the closest rack, wrapping it around my waist. I heard my phone buzz.

Holy fuck.

It was a picture of Natalia. She was standing on one toe, pulling her leg behind her so it was almost touching her head. She made a perfect circle using her leg and her back. I knew she was flexible, but this was fucking insane.

I texted her back.

I thought you said there were no cameras in there.

I waited for her response.

I set the timer just for you.

I laughed out loud. I adjusted the towel so it rested on the lowest part of my hip and took a shot of my profile and sent it to her. That should do the trick. I was dripping wet.

J’ai envie de toi.

I leaned my head against the glass wall. She was killing me. The dirty French talk. Her body. All of it. I wanted her. I didn’t need to wait until after the game to have the follow up discussion. If I had to wait a few more weeks, maybe it was worth it.

I turned off the bathroom light and wrote back to her.

I want you too.

Good night, Sam.

Good night.

I plugged my phone into the charger next to my bed and pulled back the sheets. I set my alarm. I had a game day ritual at home that started with a big breakfast and a quick jog in the park. It helped me relax.

I watched a few minutes of Sports Now before I fell asleep.

The next morning, I jumped up from bed before my alarm went off. What in the hell was that? I rubbed my eyes and took a deep breath. I knew it was a dream, or a nightmare. But it had felt fucking real. I had bolted awake with fear coursing through me.

I had been holding Natalia. We were talking about the lake or something and I rolled away from her, and when I rolled back she was gone. Instead, Maddie was there. Fuck. I ran my fingers through my hair.

Why was I dreaming about Maddie? Ever since she called when I was at Natalia’s apartment I had done everything to forget the conversation. She said she needed money. Todd had kicked her out and she didn’t know where to go. Fuck that. I wasn’t giving her a dime of what I earned.

She didn’t deserve to be in dreams. She didn’t deserve to speak to me or see me. I didn’t think about her anymore. I didn’t have a single picture of her in my apartment. When we graduated, I got rid of everything that was hers. She had put me through the emotional wringer. I took another deep breath. This wasn’t how I wanted to start my Sunday.

I put on a pair of shorts and shuffled to the kitchen. I couldn’t let something stupid like a dream interfere with the game-day routine. I had a big breakfast to cook.

***

I arrived at the stadium earlier than usual. I was off all day. I had been since that nightmare forced me awake. I couldn’t shake it. I thought about calling Natalia, but what was I going to say? Yeah, I’m fucking freaked out about a dream I had where my ex replaced you. That wouldn’t go over well in any scenario. She was understanding, but that would be pushing it. I had already made the decision not to tell her she had called me when I was in Austin. I wasn’t going to bring it up now.

I threw my bag on top of my cubby and sat on the bench. As usual, the equipment guys had laid everything out for me and the rest of the team. All I had to do was suit up for the game. But sitting here, staring at my name, I wasn’t sure if my head was in the game. I pressed my palms to my forehead.

I needed a few minutes to get my shit together, because once I took the field everyone in the stadium counted on me. Wes counted on me. Coach counted on me. But right now, I wasn’t sure I could count on myself.

26

Natalia

I walked through the door and threw my bag on the floor. My body ached all over. Four hours of dancing and I was ready to crawl into a hot, steamy shower. I was headed to the bathroom when I saw Sam’s number pop up on the screen.

“Hey, how was the game?” I asked. I turned on the hot water and added a bit of cold.

“Natalia…” He sounded upset.

“What’s wrong? What happened?” I turned off the water so I could give him my full attention.

“We lost.” His voice was low and deep.

“Oh, God. I’m sorry, Sam. You’re having such a great season.”

“Were having a great season,” he corrected me.

“It’s only one game.” I paced in my bathroom. I was out of my element. I didn’t know how to console him. I thought everyone took the sport too seriously, anyway.

“You don’t understand.”

“Did something else happen?” I was confused. His voice didn’t sound fun and flirty like usual.

“I dropped the game-winning pass.” He sounded anguished, and I suddenly understood why.

“Oh, God. That’s terrible.”

“It was a disaster. It was a perfect pass. Right at me. And I couldn’t hold on to it.”

I grasped at something to say. “There will be other games. Other chances. It’s okay, Sam. It’s okay.”

“There’s nothing okay about it.”

The silence fell between us. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say.”

“Say you can see me tonight.”

“What?” I was exhausted. He had to be exhausted from the game.

“That place you mentioned. Canyon Lake. I’ll get a cabin and we can meet. It’s only forty-five minutes for both of us. Meet me.”

“Sam, I don’t know.” There wasn’t anything keeping me here. My Monday was free. “Okay, yeah, I can pack and be there in an hour, I guess.”

He sounded relieved. “I’ll text you the cabin. See you there.”

He hung up and I wondered what he had planned.

***

I parked under a scrub oak and looked at the little cabin Sam had rented for us. It was only a few yards from the lake. His car was already here.

I stepped from the car as he opened the front door to Cottage 11.

“You made it.” He jogged down the stairs and picked me up in his arms.

“It’s beautiful here.” The moon was bright on the lake. It didn’t look as if any of the other cabins were being rented.

“I’ll get your bags.” He was already pulling them from the backseat and taking them inside. “Take a look at the cabin.”

I followed him up the stairs. It was small, but romantic. Exactly what I pictured. Only, I didn’t expect to speed here like I did, but none of that mattered. We were together and Sam seemed more relaxed than when we spoke on the phone.

The door opened and I inhaled. “Oh my God.” It was filled with candles and flowers. There was a bottle of wine on the table and a small fire in the fireplace.

“You like it?”

“I love it. It’s exactly what I wanted.”

He came up behind me and deadbolted the door closed. His hands circled my waist and he kissed my neck.

“You’re exactly what I want too.”

He pushed my cover up off my shoulders, dropping it at my feet. I spun around in his arms, remembering the last time we were together we danced in my studio.

His lips brushed over mine and I tipped forward to kiss him.

“Are you okay?” My fingers played with his hair. “You sounded upset on the phone. I was worried.”

“With you I am.” He lifted me from the floor and carried me across the room. I expected him to lower me on the couch in front of the fire, but he kept walking.

“Where are we going?”

He kicked open another door. There was a huge tub filled with bubbles.

“Don’t you like to relax after a game?” he asked.

My eyes widened. “How did you know?” He placed my feet on the tile.

“Because I know what it feels like when you work your body like that for four hours. Ever muscle is sore. Every part hurts.”

I nodded, rubbing my neck. “Everything.”

“How’s your leg?” He lowered to the floor, dragging my shorts to my ankles. He stopped to kiss the back of my leg.

“Better when you do that.” I smiled. I liked the pampering. I liked the candles and the flowers and the huge tub with bubbles.

He rose from the floor and lifted my shirt overhead.

“Fuck, I love that your tits are so perfect,” he growled.

They hardened under his stare. I stepped toward him, pressing my hands to his chest.

“Are we both going to fit in that tub?” I looked over my shoulder.

He laughed. “No, it’s for you. Enjoy it and I’ll be waiting for you out there when you’re done.”

I looked at him strangely. “Really?”

“Really.” He kissed my forehead. “Enjoy it.”

He walked out of the bathroom and closed the door. I pivoted toward the bubbles. I was turned on from his kisses and his touch, but the bath was calling. I knew where he’d be when I got out.

I dipped one toe in, feeling the soothing relief of the hot water, then slid all the way in until I was submerged up to my shoulders. I rested my head on the back of the tub. I didn’t know Sam had a romantic side. I took in the moment and let my body relax. I didn’t worry about being a Goddess or trying out for the ballet. I didn’t worry that he wanted things to move faster than I did. I tried to block all of that out and realize that an insanely hot and sexy man had planned a spontaneous romantic overnight trip for me. That was all that mattered.

***

I wrapped the towel around my chest and cracked the bathroom door.

“You still here?” I asked.

“I have two glasses of cold wine.”

I padded across the floor and joined Sam on the couch. The gas logs crackled as if they were real. They were pretty to watch.

I took the glass from him. “Thank you.”

“How was the bath?”

“Everything I needed. Even my leg feels better. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” He kissed me.

“How are you feeling? About the game.”

He shifted back on the cushions. “I’d rather not talk about it. It’s over. We lost. I can’t get that second back.”

“I understand.” I stared in the fire. “I feel the same way about my accident.”

“Then I guess I shouldn’t ask.”

I shook my head. “No, I think I can talk about it now. I’ve wanted to tell you. It’s a big part of me, Sam, and I think you should know what happened.” I took another sip of wine. “It was during a performance. And not just any performance. It was opening night. My parents were there. Do you know how huge it is that both of them were in the same room to see me perform?” I spoke the words slowly.

“I was prima ballerina. My father flew in from Paris. This was what all of us had been waiting for. Finally, after years of practice and fighting for that position—I had it. And they were so proud of me. Proud that all the work had finally paid off. The hours and the years of practice and pain had meant something.” The flames danced over the fake logs.

I paused, remembering what it felt like to see my family’s faces in the audience. How the pride poured through me like a white light when I stepped on the stage.

Sam took a sip of wine. “I think I can relate to that part, at least. My parents pushed me pretty hard to be a football player. At first it was all about being the quarterback, but after talking with a few scouts when I was ten, they decided I was going to be a tight end.”

I stared at him, realizing each moment we were together we had more in common.

“But tell me what happened. I want to hear.” He rested his hand on my knee.

“I’ve gone over it a hundred times. A thousand times. Questioning myself. Questioning my partner. Did I mis-step? Did I drop his hand at the wrong time? Did my foot miss his palm? What did I do to cause it? I’ve asked myself every question possible.”

I took another sip of wine and turned to face Sam. “And you know what I figured out?”

“What’s that?”

“That it doesn’t matter. None of it matters. If Charles had turned or I had turned. Or if the lights were in our eyes. Or the music was too loud. Or I was so nervous to see my mother and father sitting together. It doesn’t matter. Because I can’t undo the fact that I fell on stage from six feet in the air and that I tore my hamstring in so many places the ballet couldn’t keep me on.

“I can’t make it not be true. It’s my story. It’s my history, Sam. The ballet let me go, and I did just enough rehab to join the Goddesses until auditions for the troupe next year. I hated myself for months for wearing those gold boots and slutty top, but I realized something about that too. Those boots are as important as my pointe shoes. That’s my story. I was a ballerina and now I’m a Goddess. And I have to be okay with it. I fell and destroyed my career.” I touched the side of his jaw, outlining the strong bones that made up the face I had fallen for. “So, what’s going to be your story? Are you going to let one night define who you are, or are you going to keep going?”

“It’s not the same.” He leaned into my hand. I could feel the roughness of his stubble against my soft palm.

“It is the same. Injury. Embarrassment. Letting other people down on the team. Having a theater full of people see your failure. Thinking you’ve lost something you can’t get back. Thinking the one thing you love more than anything is over. I know exactly what you’re feeling right now.”

He traced my collarbone and my skin prickled. “When I’m with you, I’m not worried about all that noise, Natalia. I don’t care right now that I dropped the pass and let the team down. I don’t care that Wes is mad as a fucking hornet. That the only replay they’re showing on Sports Now is the end of our game. You know why?”

I shook my head.

“Because this is what I want. You are what I want. This is the story I want.”

He loosened the tuck I had on the towel and it fell open. I gasped.

“It is a good story,” I whispered. “I think we have the same story, Sam.”

He nodded, sliding down the couch and pushing my knees wide. I forgot what we were talking about or that the night was slipping through our fingers. As soon as I felt his tongue press between my legs, all thoughts were gone. We were in our own world, in our own cabin where Sam was right. This was a fucking incredible story.

27

Sam

Each cottage had its own pier. I laced Natalia’s fingers through mine as we stepped onto the splintered wood for pier 11. The sun was low on the horizon.

“We almost made sunrise.” She giggled.

“Almost.” I took a sip of coffee and helped her drape a blanket we grabbed from the cabin as we settled onto the bench nailed to the end of the walkway twenty yards from shore.

She snuggled against my chest and I felt the calm the nearness of her brought to my life. The world felt right. It felt quiet. I kissed the side of her temple.

The only place to get coffee around here was from the cabin the owners had converted into an office. It was sort of a welcome center for the guests. I filled up two large cups for Natalia and me while she was in the shower.

“It’s really beautiful here. I don’t want to drive back to Austin.”

“I don’t want to drive back to San Antonio.”

As long as we were keeping our relationship a secret, this was the way it had to be. I fucking hated it.

“Maybe this could be our special spot, though. The place no one else knows about. Our hideaway?”

I took a sip of coffee and nodded. “For now it can be.”

As much as I was tired of sneaking around, I started to think about what it would be like once we were free to be seen together. I didn’t know if I wanted to share Natalia. I sure as hell didn’t want to share this place. It was getting harder and harder for me to go out in San Antonio without people asking for autographs. Kids wanted to take pictures with me. Dads asked me for advice for their sons. The newness of the attention had started to wear off. I wanted my own life. There was a cost for fame I hadn’t thought through when I signed with the Wranglers.

I was tired of reading speculation about my love life. People weren’t satisfied with a single bachelor on the team. They wanted there to be a woman in my life. I couldn’t count how many times I was asked in interviews who I spent my free time with.

I wrapped a protective arm around Natalia.

“This kind of reminds me of a place I used to go fishing with my dad,” I told her.

“Really? You fish too?”

I laughed. “Of course. My dad and I fish, hunt, football—all that stuff.”

“You’ve never really mentioned your family.” Her hand slid to my thigh and I felt relaxed. We fit together so well.

“What do you want to know?” I asked.

“Where are your parents now? Are they still together?”

“Oh yeah. They’ve been married thirty years. Still going strong.”

“Basically, the opposite of mine.” She looked up at me.

“I think all marriages have their problems. The key is to find the person who can change with you. My parents seemed to have figured that out. Sometimes I don’t know how.”

“And mine didn’t. I think my mom kept expecting my dad to move us back here eventually. And he never tried. She was homesick. She missed her family, and when my grandmother became ill, it was the last straw. She wanted to be home and he refused to leave France. He’s not a very flexible person.”

“And that’s why you moved to Dallas? That’s shitty. I’m sorry.”

“I was asking about your family. Not talking about mine. Tell me more about these parents.” She changed the subject.

The sun rose higher and I looked across the lake. There was an early morning boater headed in our direction.

“There’s not much to tell. My dad played football and he and my mom met in college. She was along for the ride since the beginning. Football was her life too. I don’t know what discussion they had about me playing, but it was always understood that I was going to be a football player. She was all in. Still is.”

“What if you wanted to be a doctor or an engineer? Or an artist?” She smiled slyly.

I chuckled. “I don’t think my dad would have gone for that.” I stretched one leg out over the pier boards. “I never asked. I never thought about doing something else.”

“I guess that’s like ballet and me. I started dancing when I was three and it was in my soul.” She squeezed my hand. “I can’t imagine being anything else either.”

“Do you like Texas now that you’ve been here?” I wondered if she felt the same homesickness her mother did.

“It’s not Paris, that’s for sure.” She giggled. “And when we moved, I was a senior in high school. There’s no worse time to have to change schools. Everyone already knew each other and they were applying for colleges. I didn’t even know what the SAT was. It was a miserable year. I missed my friends. I missed Madame Collette. I missed my studio. I missed my dad, even though he was a complete asshole.” She stopped to drink her coffee.

“What was so different when you moved?”

“I don’t know if it was all the big trucks. Or the hats. Or maybe it was how everyone said hey and y’all. It took a long time to adjust. Everyone was welcoming, much warmer than my friends in France, but it didn’t mean I understood it right away. Texans are unique. And my mom always seemed French to me. I never saw her in her home element until we moved to take care of my grandmother. Now I know she’s really a southerner at heart. She either changed a lot for my dad or changed when we moved back. I don’t know. But there’s a huge difference between living in Paris and Dallas.”

“I can see that. But I’ve never been to Paris. Hard to compare.”

“You should go.” Her eyes lit up.

“Maybe some day.” I wondered what it would be like to walk through the streets with Natalia. She could show me where she lived and went to school. Maybe I’d pick up some of that dirty French she always whispered in my ear. I shook my head. I was getting ahead of myself.

“All right, so you moved, and what changed things for you? Why haven’t you moved back?” For all I knew that could be her plan. Maybe she was saving up to get back to France.

“My mom made sure I went to the School of the Arts and once I was there for college, I found my place. I made friends. It made Texas feel like home. Plus, she lives in Dallas, and I don’t want to leave her here with no family. It wouldn’t seem right after everything she’s done for me.”

I didn’t think about my parents like that. I never felt as if I owed them a damn thing. I loved them—that wasn’t it. But my success was their success. I carried on the legacy of my dad’s name every time I hit the field. I didn’t owe him for that. Sometimes I thought it was the other way around.

“What do you say we take a walk around the lake before we drive out of here?” I suggested.

“Sounds good.” She stood and folded the blanket. It was starting to warm up now that the sun was off the horizon. “I’ll get this when we come back.”

We left our coffee cups with the blanket.

I felt her hand slide into mine as we started on the small boardwalk that lined the property. It only wrapped part way around the lake before it turned into a state park area that was all natural.

The sun glistened on Natalia’s hair. I pulled my phone from my back pocket.

“I have to get a picture of this.” I held the camera toward her and she smiled. The lake was bright blue behind her. “You look sexy as hell right now.”

I looked at the picture I had taken. She’d never looked more gorgeous than she did like this.

“What about one of us together?” she suggested. “We’ve never taken one. Is it okay, you think?

“Of course.” I didn’t have any pictures of us together. I held my phone out and took a few snaps. She kissed me on the cheek in one and we were laughing in another.

She pointed at my phone. “Guard those with your life,” she instructed.

“Worried I’m going to post them somewhere?” I teased.

“No. I trust you. But really, don’t email them to your parents.” Her arched eyebrows rose in perfect symmetry.

“Yeah, I’m not bringing them into this yet. My mom would want to take you shopping and show you my baby book along with every damn football trophy I have. Besides, they’re in east Texas at a very safe distance.”

“I like shopping and I like baby books.” She laughed.

“Come on.” I tugged on her hand. “We have to get going.”

Her lips pinched together in a pouty frown. “We do?”

“I’m afraid so, baby.” I pulled her to my chest. I felt her curves align against my body. I leaned to brush my lips against her mouth.

Her delicate fingers circled my neck, drawing me closer. “Let’s stay,” she whispered.

“God, you’re killing me. I want to. You’re a fucking temptress. You know that?”

She moaned, nipping at my lips. If we weren’t outside in the bright sunlight, I’d show her exactly how tempted she made me. But there were boaters on the lake and the owners were somewhere on the property.

“Your temptress,” she purred.

I closed my eyes. “Let’s get out of here, or this entire lake is going to see what we do best together.”

She swallowed hard and blushed. “Sam, I don’t know whether to stop you or let you do it.”

I laughed. “We still have the cabin for thirty minutes. Come on.”

I would have rented the damn cabin for the entire week, but we both had work waiting for us. I’d take a beating in practice tomorrow and Natalia was preparing for a road game. We couldn’t shack up all week and pretend the rest of the world didn’t exist.

I drove back to the city with the taste of her still on my lips.

I had every intention of asking her to move in with me again, but I wanted last night to be about her. I wanted to show her another side of me. A side a beautiful French ballerina would want. Romance and attentiveness. I wanted to listen to her talk, and hold her while she came. I wanted to give her a perfect night, so she’d want more.

I slammed my hand on the wheel. It was perfect. All my moments with her were.

I pulled into the parking garage and took the elevator to my floor. I locked the door behind me. There had to be a way to get her here. She didn’t need Austin or the Warriors. I’d hire the best trainer. She would have her position back as prima ballerina. I could guarantee it.

I walked into the spare bedroom in my apartment. I didn’t know if I could transform it into the same type of studio she had, but there was nothing stopping me from moving. We could have a bigger place. Somewhere that was ours that she could deck out with whatever equipment dancers needed.

I picked up my phone and called the agent for my building.

“Hey, it’s Sam Hickson. I want to talk to you about moving.”

The agent sounded startled. “Mr. Hickson, it’s so good to hear from you.”

“Thanks. What’s open in the building?”

“We have a studio on the first floor.” He sounded as if he was looking through his listings. “There is a four-bedroom for sale above you, but that’s a lot of space for a single guy.”

“I’ll take it.” I was quick to respond.

“But you haven’t seen it. We haven’t talked price.”

“Doesn’t matter.” I knew what was in my bank account and I knew the going rate for units in this building. I could buy it and list this one.

“Would you like to see it?”

“How about now?”

“Yes, of course. Now works for me. I’ll meet you there with the keys. The owners have already moved out, so it’s vacant. I hope that’s okay.”

“Even better. I’ll walk upstairs.”

I hung up and grabbed my keys. I hadn’t worried about finding a bigger place because I didn’t need room for anyone other than myself. An extra room made my apartment plenty big. I usually met the guys at their places or the bars, and I either worked out at the team facilities or in the gym downstairs.

I climbed the stairs to the next floor. Phil was waiting for me.

“I think you’re going to like this place.” He jingled the keys in his hand.

“Great.”

He opened the door and I stepped inside. It looked like my model, only everything was bigger. There were two bedrooms grouped together, one off of the living room and the master suite at the end of a long hallway. I pushed the door open. I could see it. I could see our lives here.

I turned and almost smacked into Phil. “When I can put in the offer?”

“Today, if you want. I’ll get started on the paperwork.”

“Do it.” I looked at the hardwood floors. They needed to be refinished. The kitchen needed new tile. “How soon can I close? I want to get a remodeling crew up here immediately.”

“Uh, I’d have to check with the sellers, but I see no reason we can’t do it quickly.”

“I’ll pay cash, so you don’t have to worry about a bank holding us up. And I don’t need an inspection. I’ll take it as-is. I have a lot of plans for the space.”

Phil looked stunned. “That’s excellent news. I’ll call the sellers immediately and get everything ready for you.”

“Great. Call me when it’s ready to sign.”

I walked out of the apartment and jogged down the stairs to my own place. This was how I was going to do it. I’d build her a studio. I’d show her the life we could have together.

I understood she wanted to make money and stand on her own. I respected that, but it was keeping us apart when we should be together. I didn’t want to pay her to be my girlfriend—I tried to explain to her it wasn’t like that. I’d pay the bills and the mortgage while she focused on ballet. It wasn’t a paid relationship.

Sneaking around like this wasn’t going to work. If the Goddesses found out, they would fire her. I knew they had strange traditions, as did our dance team. The girls took some things more seriously than the players.

And then it hit me. I scrolled through my phone and looked at the pictures we took together this morning on the lake before we left.

It was shitty. But I knew exactly how to free Natalia so she could do what she really loved.

28

Natalia

Road trips were not my favorite thing. I threw my warm up outfits in a bag along with my makeup case. I also didn’t want to admit that flying out of state meant being far from Sam. It sounded silly, but I didn’t want to be farther away from him than I had to be.

He promised me another trip to Canyon Lake when we both had a day off again.

I hadn’t seen him in six days and I missed him. We talked every night, but it wasn’t the same. He texted throughout the day, but I wanted to kiss him. He sent me flowers in the middle of the week, and I wanted to jump in his arms to thank him.

I hated to admit it, but maybe he was right. Maybe being in two different cities was too hard. I struggled with the decision, but I wanted to finish the season with the Goddesses. There was a part of me that knew I had taken someone else’s spot at try outs. There was a girl out there who dreamed of being a Goddess her entire life, and I made the cut and she didn’t.

What did it say to her if I walked away? What did it say to the other girls on the team if I left before the playoffs? Part of being a dancer meant supporting the other dancers. It wasn’t only about me. I didn’t think I had made that clear to Sam. Ballet would be there when I was done with this commitment. I had to pray he would be too.

I zipped up my bag and hauled it to the front door. We had several press events and a big part in the halftime show. There was more packing required than usual and the bag felt too heavy.

Heather and Presley met me at the gates of the squad entrance.

“Ready to fly?”

“I’m all packed.” I held up my bags. I smiled brightly.

“This is going to be amazing,” Heather helped me put my bag on the cart. “I love traveling.”

I put my arm around her shoulder. “Is there anything about being a Goddess you don’t love?” I teased.

“Not a thing,” she answered. “It’s the best job in the world.”

Presley puckered her lips and applied a layer of lipgloss. “The best. Why would you want to do anything else? We dance. We travel. The men love us.” She laughed.

I tried to keep a straight face. “That’s true.”

She smacked her lips together. “We know you want to go back to the ballet. But could you least pretend you’re having some fun?”

“You know what? I am having fun.” I giggled. “I appreciate what you all have done for me. I do.” I pulled them into a hug.

“Whoa, what’s gotten into you, honey?” Heather asked.

“Nothing. I just wanted you to know how much I love being a Goddess. Being a part of the team.”

Presley eyed Heather. “Is she drunk? Did I just hear her say that?”

“I’m not drunk.” My eyebrows rose.

“Ahh, there it is. That admonishing tone we love so much. Okay, it’s her.” Presley winked.

“I don’t admonish,” I argued.

They folded their arms and stared at me.

“Maybe a little bit. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t do that. It’s a very bad ballet habit.”

“You blame the ballet?” Heather wasn’t convinced. I actually felt a little hurt. I didn’t realize they thought of me that way.

“Yes. No. I don’t know. Madame Collette was very opinionated. And she practically raised me, so maybe a little of the dance snobbery rubbed off on me. Okay?”

They both smiled. “We’re just giving you a hard time, Natalia. We know it’s different being a Goddess. But we still love you.”

I sighed. “Thank God. I was starting to think you weren’t going to let me travel this weekend.”

“And mess up the halftime show? You’re crazy. Maybe she is drunk.” Presley still wasn’t convinced.

We climbed onto the bus together. It was a quick ride to the airport and from there, we would fly to DC.

For the first time I felt as if I had this all figured out.

I sent Sam a quick text.

Headed to the airport for DC. I’ll miss you.

I waited until my phone buzzed.

Don’t stay gone long.

I started to giggle and covered my mouth.

“Who are you texting over there?” Presley leaned over the seat.

I turned my phone facedown. “Something funny I read.”

Heather grinned. “I think you have a boyfriend and you aren’t telling us.”

“No. No way.” I shook my head.

“Something has you all giddy and mysterious. It’s been going on for weeks. I can tell.”

“Nothing is going on.” My voice must have returned to ballerina status, because their eyes widened. “Sorry, I did it again, didn’t I?”

They nodded.

I had that nervous feeling in my stomach. The same one from the conversation when Heather admitted she knew about Sam and me. Although, this time, it wasn’t only about the money. I didn’t want to lose this. I was finally happy. Everything in my life was bliss. Sam. Dancing. I could wear my pointe shoes. It was perfect.

“Tell him you’ll be home Sunday night and we’ll take care of you,” Heather instructed.

I smiled. “Not necessary, but thank you.”

I settled into my seat as the bus driver closed the doors. In a few minutes, we’d be on the tarmac and in the air.

29

Sam

We won our game Sunday, but after the first few snaps, I realized Wes wasn’t throwing to me. He was still pissed about last week. I tried to talk to him on the sideline, but he walked the other direction. I was going to have to prove myself again. Fuck.

This was one time I wished I had the power to get Coach to call the plays. He wanted Wes to throw to me, but the quarterback called the shots once we stepped on the field. He didn’t trust me, and it showed.

I sat in the locker room after the game and waited for the room to clear. Wes was dressed in his dark suit. He had to move over to the press room in a few minutes.

“Hey, man. Can we talk?” I cornered him by the mirrors.

“Yeah. I have a minute. I’m waiting on the golf cart.”

“Look, I know I fucked up last week. But what happened out there today? I can catch the damn ball.”

His hand landed on my shoulder. “You blocked today. That was your job. And you did a damn good job keeping the defenders off our asses. So thank you.” He paused, and his eyes hardened. “But if you ever drop another pass in the end zone again, I swear…”

“Blakefield, they’re ready for you.”

He looked at me. “Catch what I’m saying?”

I glared at him. “Throw me the fucking ball next week.” I walked away from him.

I had it today. I could feel it. Everything was together. I had closed on the new apartment. The construction started tomorrow. It was only a matter of a couple weeks before I could move Natalia in. If he had thrown the ball to me at all, I could have given him twenty yards. But no, the bastard passed it off to Persons or threw it to Stubbs. He used me as a wall.

I picked up my bag. I remembered what Natalia had told me at the cabin. She didn’t let one mistake define her life. She was back in her shoes, preparing for auditions. I couldn’t let one dropped pass be the end of my relationship with the quarterback. I needed him and he needed me.

I lugged my Wranglers bag over my shoulder and stepped into the tunnel outside the locker room. The Fillies were grouped together, talking about going out.

“Hey, Sam.” One of them turned around and waved.

“Hey, Vanessa.” They reminded me of Natalia. I wondered how her halftime show went today. I wondered if she was in the air flying home.

“Want to go get a drink with us?” she asked.

“I think I’ll pass. I’m pretty worn out, girls.”

She pouted. “You never come out with us anymore. Last year you were so much fun.”

Last year I took advantage of every new opportunity. I had rookie fever—no doubt. But I had someone in my life and I wasn’t going to fuck it up.

“Sorry.” I shrugged my shoulders and walked past them. “Maybe next time.” But there wouldn’t be a next time. I was done with the Fillies. I was done with other women. There was only one person meant for me.

***

I walked into my apartment and grabbed a beer from the fridge. We had the early game today, so there was still plenty of football to watch. I stretched out on the couch and turned on the TV.

I looked down and saw Natalia’s name light up my screen.

“Hey, baby.” I smiled.

“Hey, we’re stuck.”

I sat forward. “What do you mean stuck?”

“Our jet is down for maintenance or something. That said it’s going to be tomorrow before we can fly out.”

“The Warriors aren’t getting you out of there?”

“No,” she answered. “We have to wait until a part comes in. I don’t know. They aren’t handing out many details.”

“I’ll get a ticket for you. I can fly you in here and then drive you back to Austin in the morning. I’m off tomorrow.”

“I can’t let you do that. I just wanted to let you know what was going on.”

“You can let me do that. It’ll take five minutes for me to get you on a flight out of there. You can be here in three hours.”

“Sam.” Her voice was firm. “What will everyone think if I fly out of here like that?”

“They’ll think you have somewhere important to be. They don’t have to know that place happens to be my bed.”

It made her laugh. “As much as I want to be in your bed tonight, I’m going to have to wait until all the Goddesses can fly out of here together.”

“I don’t like it. I don’t want you on a jet with maintenance problems. This is ridiculous, Natalia. Let me get you out of there.”

She was being stubborn and hard-headed. It was the French side coming out. Although, she said my stubbornness came from being Texan.

“No. We’re going back to the hotel and I’ll call you when I find out more. Okay?”

I took a swig of beer. It wasn’t okay. But she wasn’t playing along.

“All right. But call me as soon as you find out. And if there’s something unsafe about that jet, you’re not getting on it. The Warriors are a bunch of cheap bastards. I don’t want them fixing the plane with duct tape.”

“If I see any duct tape I promise to call immediately,” she answered sweetly, but I knew she was mocking me.

“Should I fly up there?”

“No. God, no,” she whispered. “And get me fired?”

“All right, then take your safety more seriously.”

She huffed. “I’ll call you later.”

“Hey, wait.”

“What is it?”

“I miss you.”

She whispered, “I miss you too.”

Then there was silence.

30

Natalia

It took two days for us to make it back to Austin. The maintenance staff had to order a part that wasn’t easy to find and the Warriors refused to buy commercial tickets for us when they had to pay for the jet to be fixed. I sat in a hotel room two extra nights with Heather, missing my chance to meet Sam at Canyon Lake.

I sat on one bed while Heather sat on the other, flipping through channels.

“Do you think the Warriors would pay for us to watch Game of Love?” she asked.

“They need to after leaving us to die in DC.”

She hit the purchase button. “Done.”

I laughed. “I’ve always wanted to watch this movie. It’s the one about the baseball player who falls for the reporter, right?”

Heather eyed me. “You haven’t seen it?”

“Umm, no, but I really want to.”

The opening credits started. I had a new interest in sports romances, only I couldn’t tell my roommate about it.

“Oh, we should order big desserts while we’re watching,” I suggested. I pulled out the room service menus.

“I like how you think.”

I picked up the phone to call the restaurant downstairs. I covered the receiver. “I’m getting a double brownie with ice cream. What do you want?”

“Oh, I want that.” She smiled. “But we have to do double cardio tomorrow for the double brownie.”

I glared at her. “You just took the fun out of it.”

“Sorry.” She shrugged and threw herself on the pillows while I ordered our sinful dessert.

I signed for the silver trays when the waiter brought our snack to the door. “Voila.”

I presented one platter to Heather and placed mine on the end of my bed. Things were just starting to heat up in the movie. I couldn’t take my eyes off the pitcher. There was definitely something hot about athletes. Why hadn’t I noticed it before?

“So,” Heather turned to me. “Who’s the guy?”

“There is no guy. I told you and Pres that.”

She scooped some ice cream on her fork with a bite of brownie. “Really? No guy? All the secret texts and phone calls? There’s no one?”

I didn’t want to be interrogated and I didn’t want to miss the scene where the couple went on their first date. He was taking her to the ballpark for a candlelit picnic.

“It’s my mom. That’s all. She’s in Dallas and she worries when I travel. She’s one of those hover mothers, you know? A dance mom.”

Heather laughed. “I think we all have dance moms. I guess that makes sense. Sorry. We thought it was a guy.”

“No, but what about you?” I wasn’t paying attention and dropped a dollop of ice cream on my leg.

She rolled her eyes. “I wish. I tried online dating, but that was full of creepy weirdos who found out I was a Warrior and then lied about what they did for a living. Presley set me up with one of her brother’s friends, but that was a disaster. I’m not going to date a player.” She sighed. “I don’t know. It seems impossible right now to find someone. Do you feel like that?”

I chewed on my bottom lip. What I should tell her was that it was completely possible. When she least expected it, some guy would show up out of nowhere and turn her world upside down and make everything else seem less important. He would be there for her. He would surprise her and romance her. Yes, it was worth waiting for. It was worth all the lonely nights that came before his existence.

“Oh, I know what you mean. Dating is the worst.” I felt my stomach turn. I hated lying to her. She had done so much for me.

“Oh, here’s the best part.” She turned up the movie with the remote.

We both sighed as the pitcher kissed the reporter on third base. It was sweet and sappy. But he was clearly an amazing kisser. The girl was swooning.

“See, that’s what I want.” Heather whispered. “All of that.”

I watched and realized that was exactly what I had.

***

By the time we flew back to Austin, Sam and I figured out there was no way to see each other any time soon. Our schedules were off the rest of the week and we both had away games the next weekend.

I called him as soon as I walked through my apartment door. His voicemail picked up.

“Hey, we made it back. I know you’re at practice, but I wanted to hear your voice, and maybe you want to hear mine. Call me.”

I walked into my room, feeling the drudge of traveling clinging to my skin. I stripped down and stepped into the shower. The last three days were down the drain in seconds.

Heather and I finally had our romcom marathon and I discovered that Presley was a lot more fun than I realized. She was an excellent shoe shopper and there were some great boutiques in DC she scouted for us. I came home with three new pairs of heels.

Other than missing Sam like crazy, I had a great time. But I couldn’t believe that in a few days, I had to do it again. This time we were flying to San Francisco. I couldn’t think about that now. I stepped out of the shower and dried off.

I didn’t have the energy for anything but crawling under my covers and going to sleep. I put the phone next to the bed in case Sam called.

31

Sam

“Hold on.” I called to whoever was knocking on the door. It was probably one of the guys from the construction crew. They had been tearing the place down and rebuilding it almost from the studs up. It was going to be incredible.

I whipped open the door to find out what had gone wrong this time, when I stared into a pair of brown eyes I never thought I’d see again.

“Maddie?”

“Hey, Sam.”

I looked behind her. This wasn’t right. “What are you doing here? How’d you find me? Who in the hell let you in here?”

“I’m here to see you. Pretty much everyone in San Antonio knows this is your building, and I walked in with a really lovely older couple and told them I was your girlfriend.”

I was ready to slam the door in her face. “There is no reason for you to be here.”

“I told you on the phone Todd and I broke up.”

“So?”

“So, I thought it might mean something to you.”

She brushed past me and walked into the living room. She was wearing a short black skirt and a dark pink shirt that was tight enough I could see her nipples through the front. Damn, she wasn’t wearing a bra.

I shrugged. “Sorry you wasted a trip here. But it doesn’t. I don’t give a shit what you and Todd do.” I held the door for her. “Go talk to him about your relationship problems. I haven’t talked to that fucker in three years.”

“Come on, Sam. Isn’t there some little part of you that’s glad?”

“Not really.” Why was she sitting on my couch?

She tucked her hair behind her ears. I remembered how she used to do that in college when we were studying for a test or she was nervous about something.

“What’s going on, Maddie?” I closed the door. She obviously wasn’t going to leave until she got what she came for. “I already told you I’m not giving you any money. Todd can fund your shopping habit. I’ve been out for a long time.”

“I’m not here for money. I heard what you said on the phone. I’m embarrassed I even asked. I called you because I was desperate and scared. I shouldn’t have done that. It was a weak moment. I’m sorry.”

I scratched the back of my head. “Okay, so we’ve got that figured out. Why are you here?”

She wrung her manicured hands together. “I think I made a mistake.”

“Other than a drunken phone call?”

“Stop being such a dick, Sam. Yes, I made a mistake about us.”

“Now you think you made a mistake?” I couldn’t fucking believe this.

She nodded. “Will you listen? Just listen to me. Please.”

“No. You’re talking about something that happened years ago. I’m over it. I’m over you. I don’t care about Todd or your damn breakup. Go get a job. Make some money like normal people do and leave me the hell alone.” My voice boomed across the apartment.

She started to tear up. “Oh, hell. Don’t cry about it. We haven’t been a thing in a long time. I can’t make you cry. You didn’t cry when you cheated on me.” I glared at her.

She took a deep breath. “I’m not going to cry. It’s just that when I see you, I remember all the fun we had, and how much you made me laugh. And I know I shouldn’t have cheated on you. It was wrong. I was wrong.”

I nodded. “Now you’ve got something right. So you can clear your little conscience and get the hell out of my apartment.”

I didn’t like her being here. I didn’t like her acting as if this was even a possibility.

“Nothing? You feel nothing?” she prodded.

I pulled out my phone. “No. See?” I scrolled through to the picture of Natalia and me at the lake. “I have someone. Someone who doesn’t cheat. A woman who I’m fucking insane about.” I shoved the picture closer so she could see how serious I was. “This woman is my life. You are a bad memory.”

She closed her eyes and the tears started to slide down her cheeks this time.

“Shit. Hold on.” I dropped my phone on the table and walked to the bathroom to grab a tissue. I looked through a few drawers before I found one. Part of me wanted to throw her crying ass in the hall, but I didn’t.

“Here.” I handed the tissue to her when I returned to the couch.

“Thanks,” she sniffed, pressing it to the corners of her eyes. “You sound like you’ve found someone special then.”

“Yes, I have. Natalia isn’t like you. She wouldn’t do what you did. I’m happy, Maddie. I’m happier than I’ve ever been. So drop this idea that you have. You can give up on whatever scheme you have to get back together and drain my bank account.”

I started to relax. I didn’t have to be a complete asshole, even though this girl had shredded my heart at the start of the season. She had fucked my roommate all summer and the only reason I found out was I walked in on them. It was a day I didn’t like to remember.

That was college. This was the pros. I was over Maddie.

“I told you, that’s not why I came over.” She started to raise her voice and then stopped.

She rose from the couch. “If what you’re really saying is that you’d rather be with this Natalia girl, than trying to pick up the pieces of what we had, then I don’t know what to say.”

I stared at her in disbelief. “Yes, that’s what I’m saying.” I walked back to the door. “I think you should say goodbye.”

“For good?” Her eyes were misty.

“Yes, for good. Forever. Don’t call. Don’t check on me. Go see Todd next time you’re feeling lonely and broke.”

She huffed and I saw the anger boiling in her eyes. “Maybe you are just an asshole, Sam Hickson.”

“Thanks for dropping by.” I practically shoved her into the hallway.

She glared at me and walked down the hall toward the elevator.

I closed the door. What the fuck was that all about?

***

Two days later, I figured it out.

I woke up when my phone started buzzing. I didn’t take calls this early, but I picked up the phone.

“Hello?”

“Turn on Sports Now,” Natalia instructed.

I grinned. “Since when did you become such a morning sports fan? Is there a story about me?”

“Turn it on,” she hissed.

I picked up the remote. It was still on the channel from last night. I saw the picture and read the scroll across the bottom.

“Fuck,” I muttered. I couldn’t believe it. There was a pit in my stomach. I felt panic and outrage. My hands balled into fists.

“How could you do this? Why did you do this?” she cried into the phone.

I shook my head, still foggy from sleep. “I didn’t.” But I was staring at a picture that was on my phone. One that Natalia and I had taken at Canyon Lake.

“That was a special place. A special night. And you did this with it?”

“I’m trying to tell you what happened with the picture. It wasn’t me.” She had never sounded this frantic before.

“Don’t try to tell me someone else sold our picture. You’re the only one who had it.” I could hear the sobs. “I thought you respected my decision. I thought you cared about me. You realize I’ve been fired? I have to take in my Goddesses uniform today.” She was crying hard. “I have to give them back the boots. They won’t even let me keep them.”

“God, Natalia. I know it looks like I could have done this, but I know who sold the picture. I would never do this to you. I would never hurt you like this.”

“Then who? Who has our picture?”

I exhaled. “My stupid bitch of an ex.”

“What?”

“She stopped by a few days ago and now I realize why. I played right into her hands. Damn it. There probably wasn’t a single ounce of truth to anything she said. I bet she and Todd are still together.”

“Who is Todd? Your ex stopped by and you didn’t mention it?” I could hear the outrage in her voice.

“Right, that sounds bad, but it’s not what you think either. God, this is fucked up.”

“Isn’t it?” She paused. “I have to go. I have to get to the stadium to meet Heather and give her my uniform. They won’t even let me inside. We have to meet at the gate. Do you know how humiliating this is? Do you even know what this is doing to me?”

I couldn’t fix it. I couldn’t take away her embarrassment. I couldn’t retract the photo. God, I couldn’t even punish Maddie for screwing me over again.

“I’m sorry, Natalia. Look, I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

“No. Stay away. Stay in San Antonio with your ex or whoever. Just leave me alone, Sam. You’ve done enough.”

She hung up and I sat up in bed. I stared at the TV. The announcers were still speculating on when Natalia and I had met and how long we had been seeing each other. Maddie must have sent the picture to her phone when I was in search of tissues for her fake tears. With a first name and a picture, it only took two days to track down her position with the Warriors.

I should have given her the money when she asked for it. Instead, she found a way to take it from me. I didn’t know which tabloid had paid her for it, but they could expect a huge lawsuit headed their way. Someone was going to pay for what this had cost Natalia.

I knew Natalia was angry and hurt. She thought I betrayed her, maybe in more than one way. I had to prove to her that I wasn’t that kind of man. I had questioned it myself. I had the pictures. I knew with one social media post our relationship would blow up the headlines. A Wrangler and a Warrior. What would be more taboo than that? We’d get all kinds of attention. I knew she’d be fired and that would leave her free to finally move in with me. Yeah, I was the kind of asshole who thought about doing it. I had thought about it more than once. But fuck, Natalia made me want to be a better man than that. I didn’t want to trick her into living with me. I didn’t want to force her into my life. I could have been the one to do what Maddie did, and I was ashamed of that thought more than anything.

I rolled out of bed to get dressed. I had ninety minutes to get to Austin.

My phone rang. I looked at the number. It was Keith Stone, the Wranglers’ head of publicity. It was never good when Keith called.

“Hey, man,” I tried to sound casual as if nothing catastrophic was happening.

“Sam, we need to talk about the Sports Now story.”

I started getting dressed while I talked to him, grabbing a clean pair of jeans from my dresser. “What do you want to know, Keith?”

“Is the picture real? Is the girl a Warrior Goddess? What the hell is going on?”

I sat on the edge of my bed to put on my socks. “Yes, yes, and I don’t know.”

“Not what I wanted to hear. You know management is on me to find out what’s going on.”

“I know. I know. It shouldn’t be a problem, right? I’ve been seeing her a few months. We met when the team was in Austin for the season opener. Yes, she was a Warrior, but they fired her this morning. I’ve got to get to Austin, Keith, so we can talk while I drive or I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“No, I just needed the facts.”

“Is there a problem?” I ran my hands through my hair, holding my breath.

“Nothing a good story from my office can’t handle. Send me a picture of you two when you get a chance. Not that one. Something different we can use exclusively.”

Shit. Natalia wasn’t going to like that anymore than what had already happened. I needed to see her first. I needed to make sure we were okay. I had to fix us.

“All right. Give me a few hours and I’ll send you something. Anything else?”

“I’ll call you if there is. Just know fans are going to give you hell for a while, but it actually helps that the Warriors fired her. She’ll gain sympathy points. It might make it less brutal when you two are seen out together.”

I hadn’t thought about that. The rabid rivalry had kept us apart, but now that we were public, it could be a complete nightmare for Natalia. What if the Wrangler fans didn’t embrace her? What if they turned their backs on me?

I shook my head. It didn’t matter. She was worth it. And if I had to find another team that would accept both of us, I would. I’d do whatever it took to make her happy and make her feel safe. I’d even leave Texas.

“Thanks, Keith. Thanks for taking care of this. And anything you can do to make Natalia look good, to get her Wrangler support, I’d appreciate it.” I realized instantly how valuable this man was.

“I’ve got it. Don’t worry. The Wranglers are going to welcome her if that’s what you want. Let me work my magic and don’t forget to send me a picture.”

“Sure thing.” I hung up and raced to the parking garage.

Seconds were ticking by and I needed to know that Natalia was okay.

32

Natalia

I wiped the tears from my eyes and dabbed a tissue to my nose. I didn’t know I had this many tears in me. I was crying from the shock. From the humiliation. From the betrayal from the man in my life I had given myself to.

And what did I have left? I had no job. I had no income coming in. And now I didn’t have a boyfriend. Today was terrible and horrible and I wanted to skip over it.

I pulled up in front of the gate. Heather was waiting with her arms crossed. She walked over to my car.

“Hi.” I smiled meekly.

“I tried to tell you.”

I nodded. “You did.” I handed her the uniform and the box that protected the gold boots.

“But I guess he was more important?” She was mad. Her voice cracked.

“It wasn’t that.”

I wanted to explain. I wanted to tell her everything. But I wasn’t sure she would understand. Maybe she did want a love like the reporter girl found with the pitcher, but was Heather really the kind of girl who would give everything to have it? Would she lie to protect her relationship? Would she sneak out in the middle of the night? She said she wanted all the romance, but would she ever put the Warriors second?

“Then what? What could make you risk this? You know there was no choice but to fire you once a picture like that went public.”

“I know. I’m not mad at you or anyone with the Goddesses. It’s my own fault for trusting him. I’m the only one to blame here. I’m not pretending it’s something else.”

I saw the look of pity in Heather’s eyes. We weren’t going to be friends after this. I knew that. I had betrayed her just as Sam had betrayed me. I had lied to her repeatedly and broken my oath to the squad. I felt like an awful human being.

“I thought being a Goddess meant something to you. I saw it. You started to love it. You started having fun. You were becoming one of us. A sister we could count on.”

I wiped a tear with the back of my hand. “I do love it. I did.” I nodded.

“I hope he was worth it.” She swung my uniform over her shoulder.

“Heather, wait.”

She twirled to face me. “Yes?”

“Thank you. Thank you for being so nice to me. I wasn’t the best Goddess and I gave you a hard time. It’s just as important as ballet. And what these girls do is hard work. I’m going to miss it. Especially the gold boots.”

She grinned. “I knew you were coming around. Sad about the boots. Sometimes love wins instead, I guess.”

I felt the pit in my stomach widen. There was no win for love this time.

“Right.” I got back in my car and started the ignition. There wasn’t anything left to say. She would pass my uniform on to one of the alternates.

Someone else would go to practice and fly to San Francisco tomorrow. It wasn’t going to be me.

***

I didn’t expect to see Sam’s car when I pulled up to my building. I stormed out from behind the wheel, the rage fueling my steps.

“What are you doing here? I told you not to come.”

He grabbed me by the wrist. “I want you to come with me.”

I tried to wiggle free, but his grip was strong. “No. I don’t want to see you. Or talk to you. Least of all get in your car.” He had led me to where he was parked.

“Get in.” He opened the door.

I sat inside, pissed that I had listened. He locked the doors as he peeled onto the street.

“Where are we going?” I asked.

“Home.”

***

I’d never been so mad at any man in my life. Sam drove like a speed racer. It didn’t take long to figure out he meant we were headed to San Antonio. I looked out the window and refused to speak to him.

“If you won’t talk to me, maybe you can sit and listen.”

“I’d rather not,” I replied.

“Natalia, I did not leak the photo of us. I won’t say it didn’t cross my mind.”

I glared at him. Was he being serious?

“That’s right, I did think about it, but I wasn’t going to do that. I’m not a fucking weasel. I want you. But only if you want me too. This is a two-way street, baby.”

I looked at the road. He was driving as if it we were on a one-lane highway, fast and furious.

He continued. “I’ve never told you about Maddie. And maybe I should have. But there’s a reason I didn’t.”

I waited for his explanation.

“She crushed me. Obliterated all the feelings I had. I was in love with that girl in college. And she cheated on me with my roommate.”

I bit my lower lip. I wanted to say something nice, but I remembered I was royally pissed.

Sam kept talking. “It was at the beginning of my senior season. I had red-shirted so this was my fifth year. It was the most important one of my life. There were scouts looking at me. I had agents courting me. It was my chance to finally get a ticket into the pros. And out of nowhere, this girl who I thought was in my corner, was actually fucking my friend. Sorry.” He winced.

“Anyway, it almost ruined everything. The first game I started dropping balls in the end zone. I was late to practice. I lost weight. It was a nightmare. But then one day I woke up and realized I wasn’t going to let her take my dream from me. She could break my heart, but she couldn’t ruin my entire future. And like that, everything snapped back into place.”

“Wow,” I whispered. “That’s a terrible, yet inspiring story.” I hadn’t meant to say anything.

He looked at me. “Yes, it is. And I haven’t seen her in a few years. She called me when I was at your place in Austin.”

“Wait, is that the call that had you all pissed off?”

“Mmmhmm. She said Todd kicked her out and she needed money and there was nowhere else to turn, so she called me as an old friend.”

“And you turned her down?”

“Hell yes, I turned her down. I wasn’t going to give her anything. So when she showed up a couple days ago, it was suspicious. She had some lame story about wanting to get back together.”

I bristled when he mentioned that part.

“But I showed her the picture of you and told her how insanely crazy I am about you and how you’re my future.”

“You said that?”

He nodded. “I did. I wanted her to see how happy I was with you. How happy you make me. So I shoved the damn picture from the lake in her face. But then she started crying and I left my phone for a few seconds. I guess it was long enough for her to get the photo. Now I realize she was approached by one of the outlets to get the scoop on me. She did it for the money. She doesn’t care about who you are or that she cost you your job. She doesn’t care about what it did to me to see you hurt. She’s always been a tunnel-vision kind of person.”

“And a complete bitch,” I added.

He laughed. “And that.”

“I didn’t want to leave the Goddesses, Sam. Not like this. I was really starting to like those gold boots.”

“I know, baby. But I think I have something that’s going to cheer you up.”

“What is it?” We had been on the road for over an hour and we were getting closer to the city.

“You’ll have to wait and see.”

I felt as if I could finally breathe. I believed him. I believed the entire story about the ex and the picture. The whole thing made sense. Sam didn’t have to drive to Austin to kidnap me. He did it because it mattered to him whether I believed him or not.

“Do you forgive me, Natalia, for putting you in this situation? It is my fault the picture is out there.”

I took his right hand in mine. “I do. I’m sorry I jumped to all of the conclusions I did. It seemed logical at the time, and now I realize I was a crazy person.”

“Nah.” He shook his head.

“Okay, no, I was completely justified and sane.” I smiled. I liked the feel of his hand against my palm. It was warm and strong, just like him.

If people only knew what I knew about Sam Hickson.

33

Sam

I shouldn’t feel nervous, but I fucking did. I drove under the building and parked in my usual spot.

“We’re here.” I pulled the keys from the ignition and walked around to let Natalia out of the passenger side.

“And here is where you live?” she guessed.

“Come on.” I tugged her behind me and led her to the elevator. I punched in the button and we rode to the top floor.

“You’re not going to tell me anything?”

“Give me five seconds and you’ll see for yourself.”

I shoved the key in the lock and opened the door for the new apartment. She walked over the threshold and turned to look at me.

“What is this place?”

I grinned. “It’s ours.”

“What?” Her eyes darted back and forth.

“Yep. I bought it for you. For us.” I pulled her hand. “This is our living room, the kitchen, the master suite is back there, but this is really what I want you to see.” I opened the door and waited for her reaction.

“Oh my God.”

“Do you like it?”

“You built a studio for me?”

“I did. I wanted you to be able to dance here. And look, there’s even a place for your turntable from Madame Collette built into the wall. I had them add speakers so we can tie the whole system together. And the chandeliers are like the one you have, I think, but you can change anything you don’t like.”

“Sam, this is unbelievable.” She threw her arms around me, and I hoisted her from the floor.

My lips landed on hers as I drew her close to my body. I wrapped my arms around the curve of her waist.

“I’m glad you like it.”

“You were sure of yourself, weren’t you?” She smiled.

“I was not going to use the picture.” I eyed her. “But, yes, I know you belong with me. Here.”

She stepped out of my arms and walked to the barre, pressing on it. She lifted her heel on one edge and leaned over so her body was folded in half.

“You know that this is a turn on for me, right? Watching you dance? Watching your body move like that?”

She smiled at me wickedly. “That’s good to know.” She switched legs and stretched across her ankle, letting her fingers flow to her foot.

“I’m serious. I see you in the mirror and I think about the night in your apartment.” I walked behind her.

“I think about it too,” she whispered.

I kissed her neck. She tasted sweet and wild. God I wanted her. I wanted to christen this room and the entire apartment.

But it wasn’t ready. There was dust everywhere and wires sticking out of the walls. I didn’t know when one of the workers might walk back in from a break.

“Can I take you to our temporary home?” I suggested.

She looked around. “There’s more?”

I waggled my eyebrows. “Yes. I live downstairs.”

I threaded my fingers through hers and maneuvered her through the debris in the apartment. We headed down the flight of stairs and I opened the door.

No sooner had we walked through the door, than her lips were on mine and our clothes were flying to the floor.

“I missed you,” she whispered.

It seemed like more than two weeks had passed since we had been at Canyon Lake.

“God, I missed you.” I devoured her lips, not taking my time to be gentle or easy. I wanted her to know what she did to me.

Her fingers trailed over my chest and unsnapped the button on my jeans. “I missed this,” she purred.

Fuck. My cock was hard. Two weeks away from her and this wouldn’t last long.

I grabbed her by the back of the head, but she was already sinking to her knees, struggling to get the denim off my legs. I had her gasp when my cock bounced freely.

Her hand clasped around it and tugged gently before her tongue lashed over the head.

“Fuck, yeah.” I jerked forward, smiling at her. I moved backward toward the couch and sat. She positioned herself between my knees and I watched as her lush lips inhaled my dick with swift sucking movements.

I reached for her tits, and squeezed her nipples. I could feel the tight spasm in my spine as I was about to come. I pushed her away. I wanted to come inside her.

She looked up. “Everything okay?”

“No,” I growled. “Get up here. Lie on your stomach.”

She crawled over me and did as I asked. I palmed the smoothness of her ass with one hand as the other found the wet heated entrance.

She bounced up as I slid my fingers inside her. I smiled when I felt her clench around me. I pumped in and out of her watching her ass move with the rhythm. I lowered my lips to her bottom and kissed her.

“Ohh, Sam.”

“That’s it?” I teased.

I added another finger and she whimpered. She was so fucking tight and wet. My thumb traveled lower to her nub and playfully slid it back and forth while she fucked my fingers more wildly than before.

“J’ai envie de toi,” she moaned.

I spread her legs and my tongue slipped between her slit. Fuck, she tasted sweet. I nipped at her bottom.

“Say more than that,” I demanded. “Tell me what you want.”

She clung to my fingers, panting and shaking. “Baise-moi, please. Baise-moi.”

I loved hearing the dirty words on her lips. I nestled my cock at her opening, letting her get adjusted to me again. She was slick, and within seconds, I’d be buried so deep inside her, she wouldn’t care. But I wanted to remember this feeling. What it was like with the head of my cock on the precipice of taking what was mine. With her body writhing under mine, wanting me, needing me to soothe her ache.

I began to push inside her, when my head reeled back. I lowered myself to her back, so she could tilt her hips upward. I slid so deep in her we both groaned at the intensity. I grabbed her hands and kissed her neck as I pumped in and out. Each thrust stronger than the last. And then we both began to jolt and shiver with the same momentum.

“Come with me, Natalia. Come all over me.”

“God, yes,” She whimpered. “Oui. Oui!” I felt the orgasm spiral through her as mine finally released me. I buried myself in her, claiming her, making her mine again.

“You’re mine,” I growled, hilting myself inside her.

“I am,” she whispered. “Don’t ever stop fucking me like this.”

“Don’t ever stop talking dirty.” I laughed.

I collapsed against her back, trying not to crush her with my weight.

She kissed my fingers.

“I know today has been full of surprises.” I rolled to my side and rotated her so I could see her beautiful face. “But I have one more.”

“You do?” She traced the side of my jaw.

“I’m in love with you.” It was the first time I had said the words and knew they were being said to the right person.

She smiled, her hands sliding around my neck. “I’m so in love with you.”

My lips crushed down on hers and I held her damp body against mine. I finally had her, and I wasn’t going to let go.

Epilogue

Natalia

Five months later

“Miss Natalia Dupont.” I sat on the bench behind the stage with my eyes closed. I could hear my name called over a small microphone. “Natalia Dupont?”

“Yes, yes. I’m here.”

I darted from the bench and motioned to the stage hand to let them know I was making my way from behind the curtain. I was in a fog, but I was walking through it. I had to walk through it. I had to push the doubts and the fears to the side with vicious kicks and shoves, or else they would trap me and suffocate me into paralysis. And that wasn’t an option today.

The three members of the ballet troupe auditions committee sat in the front row, each holding a clipboard. I hoped to see a familiar face—someone who would remember me from a year ago—but they were strangers.

The man in the middle spoke. “It says here you are performing an original piece.”

“Yes, that is correct.” I hoped my voice didn’t sound as shaky to them as it did in my head.

I had been here before. Two years ago, I was a part of this exact audition. I had been selected from that performance and spent the year working to become prima ballerina. It almost seemed unfair that I had to start over, but I couldn’t focus on those things. Life wasn’t fair.

I was stronger now. Stronger because I had to struggle. Stronger because I had to work through my injury. Stronger because I survived as a Goddess and made it on my own. Looking back, all of those things seemed so clear to me.

“Are you ready to begin?” He pulled his glasses to the bridge of his nose and scribbled something on the paper. I wished he would make eye contact with me, but he was reading my bio.

“I am. Thank you.” I pranced to the center of the stage and smiled when the lights dimmed.

The fear evaporated as I raised my hands toward the ceiling and held my pose, waiting for the music to begin. I heard the slight crackle of the record before the piano and violin started.

This was home. This was where I belonged. The music flared to a crescendo and I took off across the stage.

***

It didn’t matter that it was March in Texas, the sun hit me in the face when I opened the back door to the theater. I dug through my bag for my sunglasses and walked across the parking lot.

Sam stood with his feet planted solidly on the asphalt and his arms folded, making his biceps flex to epic proportions.

“You’re killing me, here. Your face is blank.” He slid the aviator shades from his face. “What happened? How did it go?” He held my shoulders. “Natalia, say something.”

I wasn’t sure who was more nervous going into the audition today, Sam or me.

He had driven to Austin with me and we stayed in the same hotel where we had our first night together. He thought it might help with the jitters, and he was right.

I looked up at him. His head blocked out most of the sun.

“Well? Did they tell you? Are you in?” His voice was urgent.

I bit my bottom lip before I cracked a smile. “Yes.” I jumped into his arms. “They loved the dance. I’m officially a professional ballerina again.”

He held me close to his chest. “You had me freaking out, out here. You know that?”

I giggled. I didn’t want him to put me down. “I love that you’re so nervous.”

“I didn’t love it.” His brow pinched together in annoyance. “But I love that you made it. I’m so proud of you.”

His lips were tender at first, but soon were kissing me hungrily. I sighed. “Not in the theater parking lot,” I warned.

He laughed. “God, please don’t tell me the ballet has rules about you dating a Wrangler.”

“It’s not so much that, but as the prima ballerina I need to keep a certain image.”

“Holy shit! Natalia!” He spun me around. “Why didn’t you say that part first?”

I shrugged. “I like keeping you on your toes.”

He carried me to the passenger side of the car. “In you go.” He dropped me in the seat and closed the door.

I waited for him to slide in behind the wheel. He shook his head. “I can’t believe it. We have to celebrate. Here, or do you want to head home?”

I was too giddy to latch on to either idea.

“You decide.”

He pulled out of the parking lot. “I think I know the perfect spot.”

He started driving west and I guessed we were headed back to our apartment. Since moving in together five months ago, Sam and I had been through our share of challenges.

There’s nothing easy about moving in with someone, no matter how much you love them. We both discovered that the hard way. I was used to quiet, while Sam seemed to revel in the noise of football games and rock music.

He wasn’t wrong about being an amazing cook, but he never mentioned that he didn’t clean the kitchen after he prepared a delicious meal. I don’t think I ever told him about my extensive fingernail polish collection that took up two drawers in the bathroom.

But we figured it out. We learned how to move around each other, and to move together when it was right. I loved what we had. I loved the studio he built for me. I loved sharing a home with him, a bed, a life.

I looked up from my phone. “Wait, a minute. Is this?” I recognized the turn off road he had taken.

“What do you think it is?”

I chewed my bottom lip. “What if they don’t have a cabin? What if it’s booked?”

He looked at me over his sunglasses. “Darlin’, it’s March. I don’t think anyone is tubing down the Guadalupe right now. Don’t worry about it. I’ll take care of everything.”

The gravel crunched under the tires as he parked under the same scrubby oak tree. I looked over at Cottage 11.

“Wait? Did you already plan something?” I was suspicious. He had driven past the reservation office.

He shrugged. “Let’s see.”

I closed the door behind me and looked out over the lake. It was a gorgeous spring day, but the sun was setting on the edge of the lake and the hues of deep orange and pink were stunning.

“Look at this, Sam.”

He circled the car and took my hand. “It didn’t look like that last time we were here, did it?”

“No. I left in the morning. It seems even more amazing now.”

“I’ll grab the bags from the back.”

“Would you mind if I made a quick call out here?”

He opened the trunk. “I’ll get these inside. Take your time.”

I pulled out my phone. There was one person I needed to tell about what happened today. I scrolled through my contacts and tapped her number. I knew with the time difference I was calling late, but I hoped she would answer.

“Hello?”

I smiled when I heard her voice.

“Madame Collette, it’s Natalia.”

“Natalia, my dear. It’s so late. Is something wrong?”

“I’m sorry. I hope I didn’t wake you. I had news I wanted to share with you.”

“Ma chérie, it’s good to hear your voice. It’s never too late.”

I could picture her. Her hair pulled back in a dark bun. I never knew how old she was—she kept her age concealed with frequent trips to the hair salon and excellent skin care. She was like most French women—elegant and flawless.

“You too. I’m sorry I haven’t called more often.”

“Tell me. What is your news?”

It was wonderful to share today with Sam. I wouldn’t trade his support for anything, but this woman had raised me in ballet. She had held my hand through shin splints and twisted ankles. She had taught me how to choreograph an entire routine. And when my parents told me they were divorcing, she was the one who let me cry on her shoulder. She was strict, and at times arrogant, but I loved her.

“Madame Collette, I made prima ballerina today.” I leaned against the car and watched as a pair of geese flew close enough to let their wings skim the water’s surface.

“Oui, oui, such wonderful news.” She was quiet. “I knew you would be back on stage.”

“I didn’t.” I spoke quietly.

“You are too talented of a ballerina, Natalia. And one day you can be like me. Teaching those to dance.”

I grinned. I doubted I could be half the instructor she was. “I’d like to think so.”

I tried to imagine what that life would be like. Would I retire from the ballet and open my own dance studio? Would Sam be there? Would we stay in San Antonio or leave if he were traded to another team? My head swam with all the possibilities.

“Au revoir, my sweet. Thank you for the call.”

“Au revoir. I’ll call more often. I promise.”

I hung up and stuffed the phone into my pocket and turned to face the cottage. Sam was waiting for me inside.

I climbed the small steps. When I pushed open the door, my breath caught under my ribs. “Oh my God.”

Everything was the same as our first night here. There were flowers and candles, and a crackling fire in the fireplace. It was the same except for the man down on one knee holding a diamond ring between his fingers.

“Before I say anything or you say anything, I want you to know I planned this for you whether or not you made the troupe.”

I nodded, speechless and shaky. I stumbled closer to him. I wanted to hear everything he had to say. I wasn’t about to interrupt this perfect moment.

I lowered to the floor, taking his face between my hands. His gorgeous, chiseled face. The one that had me from night one. I looked into his gray eyes as the tears gathered at the corners of my lashes.

“Don’t cry. I haven’t even started yet.” He cleared his throat.

I laughed. “I’m sorry.”

“Okay. This is what I want to say.” He kissed the center of my palm and held my hand against his cheek as if he needed my strength to get the words out.

“It’s been an incredible year. We’ve had to face some of the hardest defeats in our careers. The Wranglers didn’t make it to the championship. You were fired from the Warriors. That entire media bullshit—that was all my fault.”

“Hey, this isn’t sounding very positive.”

He closed his eyes. “I’m going somewhere with this, I promise.” His eyes gazed into mine. “But despite all of the damn noise, we met. And it didn’t seem to matter that I had rules, or you had rules. We broke through all of them to be together.”

I smiled. “We did.”

“And when your training schedule picked up and mine slowed down, we figured it out.”

I laughed. “Only because you used your bonus to buy an airplane to shuttle me back and forth to Austin. With an on-call pilot,” I added.

“It worked, didn’t it?” His tone was serious.

I nodded. “It did work.”

It was probably the thing that kept us most grounded. With a quick twenty-minute commute, I didn’t feel as if we were ever far from each other. Once I was kicked off the Goddesses, I started traveling when the Wranglers traveled. Sam and I made sure we never spent more than three days apart. That was our new rule—and we’d never broken it.

I realized he had done everything in his power to make me happy. He had built the studio the way I wanted. He had hired a physical therapist to complete my rehab. He had paired me with an astonishingly talented choreographer, despite all my protests. He did what he wanted to do, but it was all because he loved me.

“You know that’s why I’m down on one knee right now. Because we work. We know how to make it work.” He held the ring closer to me. “I want our future to be together. Will you marry me, Natalia?”

I took in the moment. The fire. The flickering candles. The flowers everywhere. And here we were at one of our most romantic spots, where we had spent an incredibly intimate night together. It was the night he let me soak in an enormous tub of overflowing bubbles. It was the night I had told him about my accident. It was the night I knew I was in love with him.

I sighed. “Today is the day I’ve waited for since I fell.” I focused on the depths of his eyes. “And the only reason it happened is because of you. You made me put on those pointe shoes when I’d been scared to for months. You wouldn’t let me stop rehab. You gave me the best choreographer in the business.” I giggled. “And you bought me a plane.

“Because of you, I made prima ballerina today. I have my dream back.” I looked down at the ring. I had been too consumed by his words to really notice it until now. Holy shit, it was the size of Texas.

“So is that a yes?”

I threw my arms around his neck. “In every language. In every way it’s possible to say it. It’s a yes.”

His lips covered mine and I groaned from the intensity of his kiss. It was always like this with Sam. He always made my body feel fire and air at the same time. He made me feel protected and loved. And we were going to be together for the rest of our lives. I sucked at the corners of his mouth, lingering over his firm lips.

“Try it on,” he whispered.

“Oh right.” My body was already moving with his and flush with anticipation. I had forgotten about the ring.

I held my left hand forward as he slipped it over my ring finger. It sparkled in the candlelight.

“It’s perfect.” I admired the stone on my hand.

“It’s big enough, isn’t it?” he asked.

“Sam, are you kidding? It’s bigger than big.” I could feel the weight of the platinum circle my finger.

“Good. I want everyone to know you’re my wife. That you belong to me.”

I crawled into his lap. “I do belong to you.” I pressed my forehead to his. “I’ll always belong to you.”

His arms circled my waist and I pressed my lips to his. I’d never been this happy. I’d never felt such love and warmth.

“And what about you?” I teased. “How big a ring do you want?”

He looked at me. “I have to wear a ring? I’ve got this one.” He held up his right hand, showing off his national championship ring from last year.

I nodded. “Oh yes. Not during the game, of course. Or practices. I understand that. But I want everyone to know you are this ballerina’s husband.”

He tugged at the back of my hair, dragging his lips over my throat. My breath quickened. I loved how it felt when he held me in his arms. When he directed my movements. When he created the dance between us. I was ready to burst into flames thinking about his next step. How he would position my body. How it would feel when we were taking each other, owning each other, promising ourselves to each other with a new commitment between us.

“If the ballerina wants me to wear a ring, I’ll wear it,” he growled behind my ear, kissing my skin roughly. I shivered.

“Yes, I want you to wear a ring.” I bit my lower lips as he pushed the shirt off my shoulder.

“Deal.” His hands skidded under my shirt, pushing my bra over my head with it.

He grinned widely. “You know what I’m going to do now?”

I licked my lips. I could only hope. “What?”

“Fuck you with nothing but that diamond on.”

I sighed as he picked me up from the floor and carried me to the bed. I watched silently as he peeled my pants over my legs, doing exactly what he promised. Was this happening? Was I engaged to a man who I had given my body to so freely, my heart tumbling quickly after?

Sam threw his shirt on the floor and I eyed him hungrily as he stepped out of his jeans. This man was going to be my husband. The father of my children. My life.

We would decide everything together. Our lives would forever be entwined.

I looked into his wickedly handsome eyes as he crawled on top of me.

“We’re getting married,” I whispered.

“We are.” He lowered his tongue to my breast and flicked the tip over my nipple. I arched toward him. “You’re going to be my wife.”

“Ohh,” I moaned. I’d never realized what a sexy word wife was in English.

He sucked it into his mouth and I felt the deep coiling in my belly start to tighten. My hips began to move.

He kissed me, as he settled between my legs. I was soaking with want and need. With a thirst I’d never had for him before. I wanted my fiancé to melt into my skin. Get lost with me in our desire. Climb and crawl against each other until we couldn’t breathe anymore. I wanted the friction of his skin, and the smell of his sweat to cover me. I wanted all of his cock inside of me, making me his, owning me in a new way.

With Sam, my body was free and beautiful. We fed each other’s need for raw and primal energy. We matched each other’s steps. Pushed each other’s stamina. Took what we wanted, and gave each other everything.

He hovered over me as I dug my heels against the firmness of his ass. He was torturing me with his cock, gliding it back and forth against my clit. I whimpered for his release.

“You know I want you, Sam.” I panted.

“And I’ve never wanted you this much,” he groaned.

I tempted him with a gentle rocking motion, trying to draw him inside.

He kissed me. “Does it drive you crazy if I do this?” He barely pushed into me.

“Oh, God, oui.” I tried even harder this time, but he was stronger than I was.

“Or this.” He eased at my entrance then jerked away.

“I can’t.” My head rolled to the side. “I want you too much.”

The ache inside was deep and hollow, tearing at me from all angles. I was blinded with a delirious and frantic craving. I could only hear the desperate beat of my heart. Feel the desire consume me from within. Time and space had left me and my body yearned for fullness. I wanted the satisfaction of Sam pushing inside me. I wanted the heat and the dirty words that would spring from our mouths. I needed him to move me and push me. Show me what my body could do for him. How I could make him whole again.

“Tell me,” he demanded. His eyes flared with cockiness as he bit his lip. “Tell me how you want me to fuck you. Tell me to fuck you the rest of your life. Tell me to fuck you slow and deep.”

My nipples hardened and tingled. My clit pulsed and my core quivered into a pool of lava. He had me where he wanted me. He had me wanting him. Needing him.

He let the head of his cock slide through my slick folds once again until I was raging with animal thirst for him.

I locked on his eyes. “All of it, Sam. Please. All of it. With this ring, fuck me with only this ring on, because I’m yours and only yours. And don’t stop. Don’t ever stop.”

His mouth crushed over mine as he soared inside me a piercing thrust.

“Oh, God,” I rocked toward the ceiling to meet him.

The slower and deeper he moved, the more I felt as if we were lost together in an ocean. Our bodies, drowning in each other, spinning and colliding through waves and peaks. Lulling to catch our breaths before the tide tumbled over us and we washed back out to sea.

“Forever, Natalia,” he whispered in my ear.

I could only nod in agreement as my fiancé plummeted me into an abyss of love and ecstasy. Pleasures that only existed between us. Sinful, dirty moves that we loved to perfect. He threw my ankles over his shoulders while he reached for a stack of pillows, wedging them under my bottom.

He grinned. “So fucking deep,” he promised. He kissed my calf, licking and sucking on my skin while I pushed against the headboard with my palms.

“Oh, Sam.”

He always knew what the next step should be—how to send me into a rip current of erotic sensation. His thumb pressed lightly at first and then circled rhythmically over my swollen clit. I thrashed under his touch, clinging to his cock, whimpering his name, reveling in the pureness of what his body could do to mine.

My eyes flew open as the orgasm crashed into me. He drove harder and faster, making sure we rode this one together. My ring banged against the headboard, but we kept going. Fighting the tide and the current. Holding on for life while our bodies were tossed in endless pleasure. With one final thrust, Sam plunged into me and I felt his release as his body tensed before he lowered his lips to mine and kissed the hell out of me.

“Oh my God.” I breathed heavily. I traced the dragon on his arm.

He kissed my collarbone. “You’re fucking incredible. How did I get so lucky?”

“You?” I couldn’t catch my breath. We had outdone ourselves.

He tucked me against his arm. “Is it okay if we sleep some before dinner?” he asked. “And I brought two bottles of champagne.”

“Two?”

He nodded over my head. “One for the audition and one for the engagement.” He sounded drowsy.

“Naked nap, yes.” I closed my eyes in my fiancé’s arms and fell asleep to the sounds of the lake waves hitting the shore.

Sam

I sat on the stoop of the cottage and held the fresh cup of coffee between my hands. I ran to the office to pick up one for Natalia while she slept. I didn’t want to wake her, so I waited here instead and watched the birds fly over the lake.

The lake was peaceful in the morning. We needed this time together. Time before we announced our engagement. Time before Natalia began rehearsals with the troupe. And for me, time before I had to start spring training. It was only a few weeks away.

I took another sip and thought about what was in front of us. I thought about my season and how far I’d come with the Wranglers. We may not have won back-to-back titles, but I had outperformed my rookie statistics. If it hadn’t been for Natalia though, I don’t know if it would have happened.

Maddie had screwed me over. I was convinced that I’d never date another woman during football season because of her. That was until I met Natalia. She was patient with me when no one else would have put up with my shit.

She shared herself so willingly, so easily, that I trusted her. It was the trust I needed to get over the fear that she’d leave. I was terrified she’d walk out like Maddie did. And it was the fear that got in my head—not the woman. It was the fear that distracted me. The fear that kept me off focus. I was a fucking idiot. I had trust issues and didn’t know it. I could have lost the best thing that happened to me because of it.

I heard the door creak and I turned around.

“Good morning.” She smiled. The sheet was draped around her shoulders. Fuck. She was still naked. “Can I join you?”

I scooted to the side. “I got coffee for you.” I handed her the cup as she settled in next to me.

“Thank you.” I watched as she inhaled the steam. “It’s so quiet this morning.”

“The opposite of last night.” I winked.

She whipped around. “Holy shit.”

“What?” I followed her eyes.

“Our windows were open?”

“Yeah. I wanted to hear the lake. I might need to jog back to the office for a refill.”

“The entire time? The windows were open since we got here?”

“So I aired out the place? It was stuffy. There’s not a single person here. And you’re the one sitting outside practically naked.”

“No one except the little old couple in the office.”

I laughed loudly. “Now you’re modest?”

She smacked me on the chest. “Do you think they heard us?”

“Have you tried to have a conversation with them? They both wear hearing aids. I think your double sex life is still safe.” I winked at her.

“It’s not a double life.” She pursed her lips together.

I kissed her on the cheek. She was cute when she was pissed at me. “So, how does the rock feel this morning?”

She extended her hand and her frown was replaced with a beautiful smile. “Unreal.”

“I’ve had that ring for two months, trying to decide when the right time to propose was.”

“Two months?” She studied the rainbows bouncing around the porch.

“I thought it might be at the Super Bowl.” I didn’t want to think about what a punch to the gut our season was. “But I knew that wasn’t the right time, even if we had made it.”

“And how did you know yesterday was it? What if they had rejected me and I was a crying mess? Would you have still done it?”

“That wasn’t going to happen. There was no way they weren’t going to offer you the position. I’ve seen how hard you’ve worked the past few months. You’ve thrown everything into ballet. You were meant for this, Natalia.”

She pressed a sweet kiss to my mouth. “I think I was meant for something else too.”

My eyebrows rose.

“For you. I’m meant for you.”

There was an instant pang between my ribs. I had done a lot of wrong things in my life. I’d made some shitty decisions and paid the price. But I didn’t know what I did to deserve this woman. This woman who could take me to my knees and then send me higher than a fucking kite. This woman who made dirty seem right, and love seem even better.

I had gone down on one knee yesterday, praying like a little kid that she’d say yes. That she’d join me in this crazy life I had. That she’d put up with my bad habits and my insane schedule. That she’d overlook the microscope I lived under as a celebrity. That she’d embrace my culture and realize we’d never live in Paris. That more than anything she would accept how much I loved her and wanted to protect her. I’d never had instincts like this to cherish someone. It felt natural to want to keep her close. I wanted her to be safe and happy, and nothing was more important.

She sighed over my shoulder. “How long do we get to stay this time?” she asked.

“I might have checked with the troupe ahead of time.”

“Oh?”

I nodded. “Sure did. And you have about ten days before they need you in Austin. So what if we spend three or four days here?”

“Are you serious?”

“Sound good?” I already knew the answer before she said anything. Her face was elated.

“It’s the best engagement present ever.”

“It gives us some time before everyone finds out. Before the media circus begins.” I was dreading that part, but it came with the territory of being a professional athlete.

“I thought maybe when everyone found out we were dating the fascination would have been over.”

I shook my head. “Have you seen you?” I eyed the dip at her breasts where the sheet was starting to come undone. “They will never want to stop taking pictures of you. I don’t think they care about me so much anymore.”

She giggled. “Not true. I see how the girls look at you.”

“Jealous?”

She chewed on her bottom lip. “Maybe a little.”

I grabbed the edge of the sheet to test how tightly she was holding. It fell off her shoulders.

“Sam,” she warned me.

I licked my lips. I wasn’t going to stop there. Natalia was mine. My fiancée. My love. My life. And soon she would be my wife. I had to make the most of this honeymoon preview.

“If you don’t want that little couple to see what I do to make those sounds come from your gorgeous lips, you better get inside.”

“You wouldn’t.” She looked incredulous.

“Wouldn’t I?” I winked.

She scampered up the stairs, gathering the sheet around her waist, and ran inside with laughter. I dropped my coffee and pounced after her.

Natalia had taught me something the first night we met and it was a lesson I wouldn’t forget. No matter what—never let her get away.

###

DIRTY GAME

Prologue

This was the last place I should be. The absolute last place. I’d woken up this morning in hot and dusty Dallas, and now here I was standing outside of the Dock House while boats rocked in their slips.

My heel made a hollow sound as it hit the parking lot pavement. I slammed the car door behind me and inhaled, taking in this place and all the memories we had made.

The wind whipped through my hair. I hesitated. This was all wrong. I shouldn’t be here, but I had to know. I had to see him again.

I pushed open the door, my heart in my throat, my palms dewy with perspiration, my breath fevered.

Was any of it real, or had it all just been a flash of summer heat?

1

Blake

I had been called a brooder, and at times much worse. I liked beer, an occasional dip, and I loved to fuck. At twenty-six, I valued my time and space more than the warmth of someone sharing my pillow. I didn’t have time for relationships.

And what quarterback did? I didn’t need a girl to get in my head or under my skin. One climbing into my bed was an entirely different story.

I closed the locker under where Wiley was engraved into the wood.

“You headed out?”

I turned to see one of the conditioning trainers behind me.

“Yeah.”

He shook his head. “You’re the only guy on the team who isn’t going to Cabo or Rio. You know that, right?”

“Fuck.” I laughed. “I don’t need that shit. I get enough of it during the season. The last thing I want is the fucking press following me around.”

“Going to your fishing hole?”

That’s what the guys around here called it anyway. They didn’t know shit about where I was from. I was ok with that. I kept my personal life personal. I never took them. Never even invited them.

“Something like that.” I pressed my lips together.

Jones strolled through the locker room. “Dude, you’re not going to Cabo with us?”

“Not this time.”

I got enough of these fuckers during the season. I only had one break a year. And I wasn’t going to waste it in the spotlight.

“Too bad. The girls are hot as fuck down there.”

“So I hear,” I answered.

“We’ll miss you.” Jones slapped me on the back.

The trainer bumped my fist. “Keep up the stretching and don’t tweak that knee.”

It had been giving me problems since spring training. One twist the wrong way and I had been on the ground gripping my leg. The last thing I wanted was for any of the guys to see me down. There was no room for weakness on the field.

I had put off having surgery, but I was working through a vicious therapy regimen.

“Got it.” I lifted my bag to my shoulder. “See you guys way too soon.”

I walked out of the locker room ready for my time off to start.

It was only a month until practice resumed. It wasn’t like I had months to travel the world and party my ass off like these other mother fuckers.

My job required meetings. Strategy. Planning. While they were drinking their asses onto the floor I was watching tape. I was writing plays and studying the competition. I dealt with the Sports Now speculation. I had to meet with rookies. QBs never slept.

So I took my month off. And I made sure nothing interfered with it. Nothing.

***

I carried my 6’5” frame with confident strides across the sandy parking lot, and threw a six-pack of beer into a cooler. Beads of perspiration started a slow trickle down my forehead. If I didn’t get on the water soon, the fish would be running from the sun just like I was. Damn it. This Fourth of July was hotter than hell.

I didn’t practice in fucking heat like this. That’s why we had an air conditioned facility. But I wasn’t in Orlando. I was back home for most of the summer. If there was one place that didn’t give a fuck that I was an A-rated American Football Association QB, it was this island. This tiny piece of land where I grew up.

I guided my truck under the water oaks, keeping the shoreline in sight. The road seemed to follow the curvature of the small coastline where years of ebbing and tiding had crept up on the pavement. I couldn’t tell you a spot on the island where you couldn’t see the water. As far as I was concerned, if it did exist, it wasn’t worth mentioning.

This was my place. The only town on this planet that didn’t bother me for pictures or autographs. I could do exactly what I was doing today—go fucking fishing with my cousin without worrying about a mob of fans.

I slowed the truck to turn onto the grassy path leading to my boat.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her. I’d recognize those legs anywhere. I wasn’t sure if it was the lips, the blond hair, or that attitude of hers I wanted to break. I’d always wanted to break. Fuck.

She was the kind of girl who thought she was too good for the island. The kind that only cruised with champagne in her hand, and nothing was ever good enough. But she might just be the sexiest woman I’d ever known.

When had Sierra Emory got back in town? And why was she here this summer? And why the fuck was she leaning over the bridge?

In the meantime, Cole was probably revving the boat impatiently and already a few beers ahead. We had a full day of fishing ahead of us.

My cousin sat on the bow with a goofy grin and a beer in hand. “Let’s go, man. Where in the hell have you been? I’ve been sitting out here thinkin’ you weren’t going to show.”

“You know I’m not going to bail on you.” I smiled and popped the top of my first beer. “I had a lot of shit to get done today. I’m ready now.”

I loaded the cooler, a box of tackle, and a bag of sandwiches I had picked up from the Seaside Café into the toolbox at the stern of the boat.

She still didn’t have a name. I knew it was bad luck not to name my boat, but I wasn’t superstitious. For now, she was nameless, but I trusted her. I had handpicked every limb of her frame and driven every nail into her seams. My father had tried to help, but I’d refused the free pair of hands when I had them.

I felt the back of my throat clutch at the thought.

“Can you believe it’s already the Fourth? Man, this summer is flying by.” I positioned myself behind the steering wheel. “I have to report to fucking camp soon.”

I rubbed the back of my neck. I loved this place, as much as I loved football. And right now, I didn’t know which one I needed more.

“Hey, did you know Sierra Emory was on the island?” I asked.

Cole shook his head. “No. Hadn’t heard that.”

I didn’t want to make a fucking big deal about it. “Let’s get out of here.”

“Yeah, we better steer clear of the cape today. It’ll be full of those damn ski boats, scaring off the fish,” Cole agreed.

Cole loosened the sailor’s knots and tossed the ropes up on the dock. With one hard shove, we started drifting in the creek, and I cranked the engine. The creek was alive with jumping mullets. I steered us under the bridge and headed east.

2

Sierra

From the small peak at the top of the bridge, the island didn’t look like much. In fact, it really wasn’t much at all. It never had been. No coffee shops. No yoga classes. There wasn’t even a gym. I didn’t know how I was going to manage the rest of the summer here.

It always felt like time travel when I came home. Home. It was a weird word to associate with this place.

I might as well have jumped in a time machine. I gripped the bridge’s railing. Damn, this island was hot. I shielded my eyes from the reflection and tried to focus on the two fading figures laughing and sipping from koozies.

The island wasn’t more than two miles wide and five miles long. When I was a kid I’d known every square inch of it. That seemed like a million years ago now. Exploring this place was the last thing I wanted to do anymore. That girl no longer existed.

I shouldn’t be here. Leave it to Aunt Lindy to pass her estate to me in the heat of the summer.

The boat was on the horizon now. I probably had known those guys in my past life. There’d been a time when I’d known all the island guys. They wore T-shirts, deck shoes and most of them walked around with a cigarette.

Sweat trickled down my neck, and I piled my hair on my head, hoping a breeze would find me. I had wandered a little farther than I’d planned. My mission had been to jog to the store and pick up some ice for the cooler, but once I’d reached the market, I’d kept running. Maybe I was trying to outrun the heat or just outrun this feeling that I was going crazy.

I didn’t know if I could handle opening one more drawer only to find it was stuffed to the top with moth balls.

I turned from the bridge and wondered why I had ventured this far without a car. I still had to stop by the store and walk home with a bag of ice. The ice maker was broken and nowhere among the piles of Tupperware and casserole dishes had I found any ice trays.

A gust of cold air hit me as I pushed open the door to the market. Immediately, the smell of turpentine, fishing tackle, and candy bars hit my nose. It was such an odd combination to my senses. The hardwood floors had been worn from years of fishermen and islanders waiting in line at the counter for their handwritten receipts. As far as I knew, this was the last place in the world that didn’t electronically print receipts.

I smiled at the old timers huddled in the corner near the magazine rack. They tipped their hats and refocused their attention on the smooth pieces of wood they were whittling. Their rocking chairs gently rolled on curly-cued pieces of new wood shavings.

I hauled the ice to the counter and paid. The clerk handed me the ice receipt, but before I could make my way out of the door, I bumped into a woman rushing through it. Bright nail polish flashed on her toes, on display in her fluorescent flip-flops. Her earrings, obviously shells, matched a print on her T-shirt. Her arm jangled with bracelets reaching almost up to her elbow. The woman let out a shrill cry that could be heard from the other side of the street.

“Sierra Emory! Little Sierra Emory.”

I nodded meekly and smiled. Who in the hell was this woman?

“Well, shoot! I’ve been meaning to come down and say hi. I was so sorry to hear about your aunt. But tickled you’re going to be moving in.”

“Oh I-I’m not…”

She cut me off.

“That house is gorgeous. Prettiest one on the island. I’ve always said that. Always.”

“Thank you.” I nodded, but wasn’t sure what I was agreeing to. I had already decided that as soon as I sorted through Aunt Lindy’s things, I was selling the house. I couldn’t hold on to it and live in another state.

“Why don’t you join my husband and me tonight for some island-style cookin’?”

“Oh no, no. I couldn’t impose on you like that.”

I wasn’t sure which was the more embarrassing route—to admit I didn’t know who she was, or the fact that it was the Fourth of July and I had absolutely zero plans.

“You need to go ahead and learn this right now. I do not accept a no. Your aunt knew that. So just plan on being at our house at seven o’clock. It is the Fourth, and we know how to do it up right. Henry got some clams today and we’ve got a plan for them. You’ll love it.”

I knew how to pick my battles, and it looked like I had already lost this one.

“Sure, ok. Thank you for inviting me.”

“Oh, I’m so excited. I’ll see you tonight.”

“Oh, wait. I don’t know where you live,” I blurted out. Maybe she would get the hint I had no idea who she was.

“Honey, just drive toward Shell Point, and when you hear the music, you’ll know you’re close to Shirley Lane. Henry named the street after me.” She flashed a big smile, and turned to avoid bumping into a fisherman loaded down with a bag of bait and a fishing pole.

I watched as the woman climbed into a car and drove away. I gripped the bag of ice I had just purchased and faced the heat.

At least I had her name. And something to do tonight that didn’t involve going through old magazines and packing up clothes for Good Will.

3

Sierra

I sifted through my suitcase in search of two articles of clothing that would complement each other, and make the best impression on the island locals. I tossed a turquoise T-shirt on the floor.

I hadn’t thought about red, white, and blue. I had no idea what to wear to a clam dinner. Probably just some shorts and a top. But nothing looked right. Why was the closest mall two hours away?

I was surprised I cared so much. Surprised that it mattered to me what these people thought. People I had ignored and pretended didn’t exist for years.

But here I was faced with looking them in the eye tonight. They knew I had missed my aunt’s funeral. They knew I was locked up in this big house cleaning out closets and tearing through drawers.

They knew I was from here. That I used to be a little girl with long pigtails that ran barefoot across the shores of the sound. But I wasn’t that little girl any longer.

I had driven over that bridge when I was eighteen, never wanting to look back. I didn’t want the island to define me.

I looked at my reflection in the mirror one last time and turned off the light, realizing that no matter how hard I’d tried, the island had left an imprint on me I could never escape.

***

A few minutes later I turned my car onto Shirley Lane.

I wasn’t completely sure it was the right place. The front porch light wasn’t on.

I scanned the front yard that Shirley described earlier at the store. I huffed. No one around here liked to give addresses or phone numbers. I was going to have to ring the bell and find out where Shirley lived.

Before I had even stepped one toe in the driveway, I heard a raucous sing-along drowning out the lyrics of the music. I followed the sounds, walking around the side of the house to discover a yard lit by tiki torches. It was crowded with barefoot people. There was a huge open flame pit dominated by a three-foot tall steaming pot.

Oh God. Half the island was here. I debated whether to join the crowd or retreat to the car. This isn’t what I thought Shirley meant by dinner. I wasn’t ready for this.

Shirley emerged from behind the singing masses.

“Oh, Sierra. Finally. We’ve been waiting for you.” The hostess trapped me in a bear hug. “I want to re-introduce you properly to the island. Come on. Come on.”

“I-uh.” She tugged on me and I had no choice but to follow.

“Henry! Come over here. Leave that fire to the boys. I want you to meet the Sierra Emory I was telling you about. Lindy’s niece.”

A tall, white-haired man with weathered skin and kind eyes handed off a long stick he was using to stoke the fire and walked toward us.

“Shirls, who do we have here?”

“Hi.” I extended my hand. “Thanks for having me tonight.”

I handed Shirley a gallon of ice cream. It was the only thing I could think of to bring at the last minute.

Shirley’s armful of bracelets shook as she took the treat. “Aww, you shouldn’t have. That is so sweet. Henry, isn’t this sweet?” She handed the ice cream to her husband. “I couldn’t believe it when I ran into you today. You want something to drink?”

“Sounds good.” I nodded. Alcohol might be the only way to survived this.

“The tide’s coming in and we don’t have much beach here, so we had to move the coolers to the boats to make room for the fire pit. We’ll just walk down there and get you something.” Shirley extended an arm and waved in the direction of the steaming pot.

After leading me across a grassy lawn and making introductions to the corn hole players, Shirley guided me down a path to the narrow sandy beach.

Shirley squealed and stopped the tour in front of a solid-built woman, who looked to be about forty. Her sunglasses were perched on top of her head, and she had a beer in one hand.

“Jojo, you remember Sierra Emory don’t you?”

“Nice to see you again. How’s it going at Lindy’s?” Jojo asked.

Jojo had worked at the post office when I was growing up. My aunt would stop by every afternoon and they talked. I never paid attention. For the first time I wished I had. I had absolutely nothing to say to this woman.

“It’s good.” I smiled. “Busy.”

Shirley tugged on me. “Everyone’s glad you’re here.”

“Yes, it is nice to have a little social activity for once this summer.”

Jojo laughed. “Now that you know Shirley Lane, your social life will never be dull again.” She took a sip of beer. “Shirley, don’t you think there are a few more people we could introduce her to?”

I thought I caught a conspiratorial wink exchanged between the island women.

“Yep. Yep. I’m headed to get her some drinks right now.” She turned toward me, leading me away from Jojo and to the boats pulled ashore.

Three skiffs dotted the ebbing beach beyond the fire pit. The sterns were lapped by incoming waves, and the bows were pulled high onto the shore.

“Sierra, I’m right behind you. I forgot to tell Henry where to stash the ice cream. Help yourself to whatever you’d like.” She pointed to the boat lineup. “I’ll be right back.” Turning on her heels, she scampered off to find Henry.

Why were all of the drinks on the boat? This was ridiculous. I continued the search for drinks. I wondered if there was anything other than beer. Just one drink and I was out of here.

“Blake, catch!” A deep voice called out from the farthest boat just as I was knocked to the ground by a figure running backward. All I could make out were outstretched arms and an airborne can of Bud Light.

“Score!” the receiver yelled, holding his beer can in the air and flashing a smile after his twenty-yard reception.

“Hey! Not so fast with your victory dance, quarterback.” I fumed from the sand.

An islander spun around, casting a shadow across my face.

“Let me help you up. I’m really sorry.” He extended a hand.

Brushing the sand from my legs and assessing the damage, I pulled myself up.

“Sorry?” Who in the hell knocks a girl down like that?

I realized that, other than a little wet sand stuck to my favorite shorts, I was fine. But I wasn’t about to let my cocky assailant know that. I was ready to launch into a verbal tirade on why he should have been paying more attention, when I looked up and lost my words.

I took in the muscular six two frame topped with sandy hair. I had only seen eyes that color once before. They were a grey-green I couldn’t forget. They were sexy bedroom eyes that threw every good comeback I had out the window.

“Blake?” I sputtered, finding my voice.

He threw everything out the window. Holy shit.

4

Blake

Fuck.

“Sierra.”

“What are you doing here?” she asked. Her eyes seemed to light with as much fire as I had running under my veins.

“I could ask you the same thing.”

I had plowed her down. Run her into the sand as if she were a lineman on a Sunday afternoon. She didn’t want my help dusting off the sand.

“My aunt died. I’m cleaning out her house,” she explained. She pinched her plump lips together. Those fucking lips.

“Right.” Fuck. Why was it I couldn’t think about anything except the last time I saw her?

She took me right back to high school. To college. To a time when I gave two fucks about what a girl thought.

Cole ran up behind me. “Why if it isn’t Sierra Emory.” He pulled her into a resistant hug. She looked over his shoulder at me.

“Hi. Cole.”

“It’s like a damn high school reunion around here.” He grinned. He was already drunk.

“I guess so.”

“Is this your boat, Cole?” Sierra asked.

“Nah, she’s Blake’s. He built her himself,” Cole said, as I turned up the music.

“Really? You built this?” Sierra looked surprised.

I hopped on the boat and strolled to the lineup of coolers.

I leaned back in the captain’s chair, propping my feet next to the steering wheel. “Really.”

“Sorry, my cousin’s such an ass and a bad receiver. That was a perfect throw,” Cole quipped, smiling at Sierra.

“You’re crazy.” I glared. “I caught that pass by the way. Which is pretty fucking amazing considering I’m the one who usually throws it.”

“No one around here gives a shit,” Cole shot back.

I grinned. It was why I loved it. But now Sierra was here and suddenly it didn’t seem the same. She shouldn’t be here. My boat was anchored on shore, but I felt as if it were rocking with some new kind of current.

“Don’t want your head getting too big,” I egged him on.

“It was good to see you both.” Sierra stepped back. “But I think Shirley wanted me to see some other people.” I wasn’t surprised she was trying to run. Typical.

“Hey, come on. Why don’t you cruise with us?” Cole asked. “Like we used to do.” He waggled his eyebrows. “It will be like old times.”

I retrieved my legs from their propped position. “Man, I didn’t know we were planning a cruise tonight. It’s going to be crowded out there with everyone trying to drop anchor to watch the fireworks.”

I sure as fuck wasn’t going to tell Cole I cared if Sierra was out on the water with us, but I’d be damned if I would just invite her back into my island life.

Cole shot a look over his shoulder to the Shirley Lane party, and Sierra followed his gaze. Henry was parading around the corn hole players with Shirley perched on his shoulders. She was screaming all the words to the pirate tune blaring across the beach. Things at Shirley Lane were getting rowdy. Drunk rowdy.

“It’s either this or we cruise.” Cole shrugged his shoulders at me. “It’s up to you—your boat.”

“All right. Let’s pull anchor. Come on.” He made his way to the bow of the boat and started working the anchor free from the sand.

“I’m going to shove us off,” Cole offered.

Sierra hadn’t moved.

“If you don’t want to ride, just stay here, darlin’,” I called over the low rumble of the diesel engine.

I didn’t need her on my boat. I didn’t need her on my island. I wasn’t going out of my way to make her comfortable.

“I’m going.” She jogged forward and Cole helped her across the bow.

Fuck. Now what?

5

Sierra

I glanced back over my shoulder at Blake and Cole. I had settled at the bow of the boat. The wind whipped through my hair as Blake steered us around the island.

Cole was laughing at something Blake had said, but I couldn’t hear what the guys were discussing over the muffled sounds of the wind.

I don’t know why I decided to jump on board. It was stupid and rash. I didn’t want Blake to know it bothered me. I wanted to act like things were fine. Normal. I could handle it.

But on the inside I was dying. Falling apart. Shaking from the look in his eye. The anger in his voice. What in the hell was I doing here?

I tried to catch my hair in a fist. It was blowing all around my face.

I edged off the bow and attempted to stand. Before I was completely upright, the boat slowed to a crawling pace.

“Be careful up there,” Blake called. “I don’t want my passengers going overboard.” But there was no concern in his voice. It was a definite warning not to screw with his night.

With the boat almost still, Cole walked toward me. “You need something? Out of beer?”

“Uh, no, just wondering if you could tell me where we are.” I looked away from Cole, and motioned toward the water. I used to know every part of the sound. All the creeks. Now it was practically foreign.

I was turned around and couldn’t get my bearings.

“Why don’t you sit with Blake? He knows the island better than anyone.”

I didn’t know if that would make the shaking stop or make it worse. Why did seeing Blake Wyatt after all these years do this to me?

Sure I’d seen him on TV. It was hard not to. He was the biggest thing to ever come off this island. He was one of the AFA’s biggest stars. And he was my ex.

The guy I never stopped thinking about. The one who haunted me. The one who made it impossible to let another guy near me. Damn it. Why was I on his boat?

I stood and balanced myself before taking a step toward the stern. I had to prove to myself and to the guys that I could be casual about this. What happened all those years ago didn’t matter anymore. I had accepted our fate.

Blake and I weren’t meant to be. He was successful and famous. I was living my dream in Dallas. We were never going to be right for each other.

“Can I sit here?” I pointed to the seat Cole had vacated next to Blake.

“Go ahead.” Blake sipped from his beer and cut the engine to an idle. “We can slow it down in these calm waters. No danger of hitting sandbars tonight.”

I lowered myself onto the narrow bench next to him. He kept his eyes straight ahead, concentrating on the channel markers. As he clutched the steering wheel with one hand, I noticed the muscles in his arms flexing with each movement.

“That’s good.”

This was fucking awkward.

“I can just drop you off. Cole’s drunk. This was his idea. Not mine.”

I saw his cousin propped against the bow. His eyes were closed.

“I’m fine.” I felt as if I had to say it aloud. He needed to hear it. I needed to hear it. It was a complete lie.

“Sure you are. Always fucking fine,” he grumbled.

I stiffened next to him. Maybe I just needed to get off this boat.

“Hey, what was that old story you used to tell?” I asked. I recognized where we were for once. “Was it the swimmer something?”

“Fuck, Sierra. You don’t remember? Seriously?”

I shook my head. “Not really.”

“I could tell you, but I wouldn’t want to scare you.”

“You can’t scare me,” I taunted.

“You sure about that?” Blake smiled. It was sexy and smoldering. Enough to make me shiver.

He eased closer and rested his arm on the ledge above my shoulders. The breeze swirled through my hair, and I wondered if he could smell my shampoo, because I was drinking in every ounce of him—even though I tried not to.

“Try me.” I turned toward him, fully aware that his arm was almost touching me. Almost.

“See that light out there.” He pointed to a faint flashing yellow light in the distance.

“Of course,” I responded. It was as clear as any of the other markers dotting the dark waters.

He pivoted toward me. “Even if I wanted to, I can’t take us to it. As soon as we head toward it, it will move.”

My eyes grew big. “Oh wait. I think I remember that story.”

I never believed in ghost stories or legends. “It’s not real, Blake.”

“It’s real. The way my dad told it, a sailor was stranded on the shoals after a shipwreck about a hundred years ago. He was able to get out of the ship with a lantern and tried to swim to shore, but the currents out here are unpredictable and he never made it to land. The next day, they found his lantern, but never the body.”

I shivered and inadvertently scooted closer to Blake.

He continued with the tale. “So, the legend goes that the blinking yellow light is him still trying to swim to shore, but no one can ever catch up to it because of the currents.”

“Holy shit. It’s still the creepiest thing I’ve ever heard.” Ok, maybe I was a little scared. I had forgotten all of the tragic stories from the ocean.

“You want me to show you?” Blake placed his hand on the gearshift, ready to maneuver the boat toward the lantern’s light.

“Definitely.”

He laughed and gave me a killer smile that made me glad I’d boarded his boat.

“Hey, Cole.” He called up front, but his cousin was busy sleeping off his beers.

I lightly bit at my lower lip. Something about the way Blake took command of the boat as he stood and steered toward the golden light without reservation made me look at him the way I used to. It was kind of hot.

“Almost there,” he shouted over the wind.

I peered over the console, trying to keep my eyes on the target. The closer we got, the weaker the color was. I squinted harder as Blake slowed the boat.

“Where did it go? It should be here.” I stood, looking over the side of the boat.

“Over there.” Blake pointed three hundred yards east.

Blake reached down and let his hand rest on my shoulder. “I think that’s enough ghost hunting for one night. What do you say I take you home?”

Surprised by the heat that stemmed from my shoulder, I smiled. “Sounds good.”

“Hold on up there!” Blake shouted before throwing the boat into full gear and pointing it toward Aunt Lindy’s pier.

6

Blake

I dropped Sierra off on her aunt’s pier and didn’t even look over my shoulder. I wasn’t supposed to care if she made it inside the house, or if she even fell over into the dark waters.

It was stupid relieving old high school pranks about ghost stories and shit that was from the past.

I chugged the last of my beer and steered us back. Cole could wake up in the morning to a neck full of mosquito bites. I left him snoring on the bow and hopped off.

I didn’t know if I could shake it. If I could pretend she wasn’t here. I drove home with fireworks exploding overhead.

My palm slammed into the steering wheel. My summer was fucked. The peace I needed off the field to be the warrior I needed to be on the field was fucked. The last shred of solitude I had found in my life was fucked because Sierra Emory had decided to come home.

It didn’t matter she hadn’t been seen here in eight years. She never visited her aunt. I heard she didn’t even make the funeral.

And now what? She thought she could parade that tight ass into one of Shirley’s parties and all would be forgiven?

No one around here cared she was some kind of hot as shit reporter in Dallas. Money didn’t impress islanders. Neither did fame. Hard work did. Loyalty. Family. She’d fucked all that up.

And it was time someone told her she didn’t belong on this island.

I drove deeper through the winding streets until I parked outside of the two-story Victorian house.

It had been in Sierra’s family for over a hundred years. The islanders said Aunt Lindy’s father was crazy when he built it. They said it wouldn’t withstand a hurricane or even a nor’easter, but here it was, still standing.

I glared at the white siding and the drain pipe next to the upstairs bedroom. I’d helped Sierra sneak out more than once using the metal as a ladder.

I slammed the truck door, marching up the back stairs. They creaked under my weight.

“Sierra!” I pounded on the door. “Sierra. Open up.”

I heard the lock rattle and then she appeared on the other side of the screen. Her face glistened with tears.

What the fuck?

“What are you doing here?” She wiped at her cheeks with her fingertips.

“Why are you crying?” My shoulders were tense. My neck strained. I had walked up here with a mission to put her straight.

She shook her head. “It’s nothing. Stupid nostalgia I guess.”

“Nostalgia, huh?” I crossed my arms. It was fucking ironic is what it was.

“What’s wrong? Why are you banging on the door?”

“I thought we needed to get a few things straight.”

“Like what?”

“Are you going to let me in?” The screen door was a barrier between us.

Her hand rested on the latch and suddenly the door was open and I was inside the old house.

There were boxes everywhere. Half the furniture was covered in sheets.

The place was depressing.

There was a light on in the kitchen. Sierra leaned against the wooden countertop. “What is it? Did you show up to tell me more ghost stories? Because believe me, I have enough to last the rest of my life.”

“No. No ghost stories. But seeing you is like living one.”

“Ouch.” She lowered her eyes. “How long have you been waiting to say that?”

The anger flowed through my blood like hot lava. Did she have any idea what she’d done to me? Did she know what she’d cost me?

“Too long.” I clenched my teeth.

“Now that you’ve said it,” her pale blue eyes lifted to mine, “you can go, Blake.”

“You can’t throw me out.”

“Yes, I can. It might have been nice for two seconds to cruise around the island and hang out with Cole, but clearly that’s not going to work between us.”

“No. It’s not.” I took a step toward her. The light behind her cast her into a dark shadow, but I could still see the tears glistening on her cheeks.

“So leave then. Let me be miserable on my own. Can’t you do that?”

I stopped in front of her and inhaled the air around us. I could smell her perfume. Her shampoo. I could almost taste the strawberry lip gloss that she’d used to wear on her lips.

“I’m not going until I’ve said what I have to say,” I growled.

Her eyes flared. “Then say it and get out.”

My hand snaked around her waist, pulling her toward me. In an instant my lips crashed into hers as she threw her arms around my neck. The kiss was hot and fiery. Enough to make my cock throb. My tongue found hers twisting and sliding in a rhythm that was at the same time new and familiar.

I tugged her hair through my hands, deepening the contact until I heard that perfect little purr she made. The one I’d never forgotten. The one that haunted me like a damn siren’s song.

My blood raged with heat. My cock throbbed. My hands coasted over her body. And then I realized I had a chance to fuck Sierra Emory again and everything went black.

7

Sierra

His hands tangled in my hair and the heat spread from my neck to my breasts. They perked and hardened as his hand slid under my shirt.

It all happened so fast. I didn’t have time to think or feel. Only react to the way Blake knew how to handle my body.

I grabbed at him. Needing contact. Needing warmth. It was the hottest part of summer, but I had been locked up in this lonely house without warmth. Without this.

Blake wasn’t a boy anymore. He was a man. An overbearing, confident, sexy-as-hell man. His shoulders bulged above me and I felt the hardness of his erection press into my hip.

I moaned slightly at the impact of it all.

And that’s when we broke apart. Like two magnets completely repelled by each other. Blake stumbled backward and I reached for the countertop to keep from buckling to the ground.

That kiss never should have happened.

Before I could say anything, he walked to the door, slamming it behind him. I touched my lips with my fingertips, feeling the burn his mouth had branded on my skin.

Shit.

I locked the door as he peeled out of the driveway. The wheels sprayed gravel in every direction. I leaned into the door as if that would somehow steel me to do the right thing for once.

Since I had been here nothing had gone right. Tonight was just another example.

Everywhere I turned were reminders of how much I had screwed up. I slid to the floor and let the tears follow.

I’d always wanted to tell Blake the truth. I’d always wanted him to know, but too much time had passed. And then he’d been drafted by the AFA. Now, he was famous—he was a millionaire. He didn’t need an ex-girlfriend showing up to confess her past sins.

I sobbed into my hands until I knew my face was red and blotchy.

What could he do about it now? What would he say? How would I ever explain what had happened?

I crawled toward the coffee table and grabbed a handful of tissues. I blew my nose, knowing it was pointless. The tears were going to come back tenfold.

Just seeing Blake again brought it all back. Every memory. Every moment we’d spent together. Every shred of glass that pierced my heart.

I’d spent my life putting it all behind me and now I couldn’t run anymore. It was all around me. The lies. The deceit. What I had given up. How weak I had been. I shook on the floor, letting the sobs wrack my shoulders harder with each wave of emotion.

***

Eight Years Ago

Emily tapped on the door. “Sierra, you’ve been in there forever. When are you coming out?”

I stared at the stick on the bathroom counter. I was huddled on the floor in shock. Maybe it was a dream or rather a nightmare.

“Are you ok?” my best friend called through the door.

I rose slowly, needing the reassurance of the tile under my feet. I unlocked the door and let Emily in.

“What is it? What does it say?”

I pointed to the countertop.

She covered her mouth. “Oh my God. You’re pregnant. You’re actually pregnant.”

I nodded in disbelief. It hadn’t registered yet. I held up the two lines and looked at them again. This couldn’t be happening.

I felt her arm circle me. “Are you ok?”

“I think so.” I turned toward her. “What’s Blake going to say?”

She squeezed me tightly. “He’s going to say that whatever you need is what he’s going to do. He loves you. He totally loves you.”

I bit my lip. “But a baby?” I could feel my stomach roll, but I didn’t know if it was from the nerves or from the morning sickness that had started plaguing me.

“He can handle anything.”

I nodded in agreement. It was true. We might be young, but I knew there wasn’t another guy in the world like him.

There were a lot of old families on Gull island. Families who had passed down family businesses from generation to generation. Sometimes it was fishing. Sometimes it was a local store, but for the Wyatts it was boat building. Blake had something in his family I didn’t have—roots.

Even though Aunt Lindy had told me the history of the house and about all of the years her father and uncles had served in the Coast Guard, I still didn’t know where I fit into that.

I picked up the stick and stuffed it in the paper bag from the store. Emily had driven with me off the island to buy the test. The last thing I needed was some nosey neighbor finding out I thought I was pregnant. Aunt Lindy and Blake’s dad would have heard about it before I even had the test results if we hadn’t moved the shopping trip off the island.

Emily had been brave enough to hand the cashier a wad of bills when I thought I’d pass out from the embarrassment.

“Where are you going?” she asked. “Are you ok? You’re looking a little pale.”

“I’m going to tell him.”

“Now?” Her eyes widened and her brunette curls bounced.

“Yes. Now. If I don’t, I might talk myself out of it. And this isn’t one of those times I can talk myself out of it, right?”

She nodded with a soft smile. “Of course you have to tell him. Go. Talk to him.”

Emily had moved at the beginning of our senior year from Charlotte. From the start, we’d had that instant girl thing where we could finish each other’s sentences. Sometimes I swore we could even read each other’s thoughts. I don’t know how I’d manage to exist before she showed up.

“Ok. Good luck. Call me after. Ok?”

I hugged my best friend. “I will.” I needed that hug. It seemed hard to believe I had only known her a year.

I rushed down the spiral staircase. Aunt Lindy was in the kitchen working on dinner.

“When are you coming back, honey?” she asked.

“For dinner.” I smiled. I wasn’t sure how I was going to break the news to her either. First the daddy. Then I could worry about everyone else.

“I’m working on roasting a chicken.”

I grabbed at my stomach. For the past week, any mention of poultry had made my stomach queasy. I smiled meekly.

“I’ll make sure to be home.”

Once I put my key in the ignition, this was it. Our lives would never be the same. I hopped behind the wheel of my Jeep. I pressed my palm to my stomach. It was still flat. You would never know looking at me I was six-weeks pregnant. There was no more time to hesitate. I backed out of the driveway and raced to Blake’s house.

I pulled up in front of the boat storage building where Blake’s dad and uncle worked. The family business was boat building, but not for Blake. He had a football scholarship. A full ride. He only had a month left before practice and school started.

A month wasn’t long to figure this all out. But we were going to college together. We had planned out everything. Everything except a baby.

I stepped from the Jeep just as Mr. Wyatt appeared.

“Looking for Blake?”

I shoved the paper bag behind my back. “He said he was going to help you with one of the boats today.”

Mr. Wyatt and I had never gotten along. I didn’t know if it was because the only family I had on this island was my aunt, or he just wasn’t going to like anyone his son dated.

I knew he thought I interfered with Blake’s dedication to the game. I liked to think we proved him wrong. Blake was going to be Saints College’s starting quarterback, and I was headed to journalism school. We may have given each other every free second we had, but we also worked hard and had something to prove for it. My Wyatt owed me that much. The man needed to cut me some slack.

“I’ll tell him you stopped by.”

“But is he here?” I tried to peer around the older man.

I wondered if Blake would look like his father when he was older. There was a striking resemblance. The same piercing gray-blue eyes, a strong jaw, and wide shoulders. The only difference was Mr. Wyatt’s son towered over him by a good four or five inches.

“He ran to the store for me.”

“Ok.” I felt the pit in my stomach. I wanted to tell Blake. I needed to tell him. “I can wait.”

“I don’t think so. We have a lot of work to get finished.”

He was always trying to get rid of me. It was one of the things I was looking forward to in college. The Wyatt parents couldn’t hover over us anymore. College seemed like a dream—complete freedom.

“What if I just sit in my Jeep?” I offered.

“Fine. But he can’t go off with you. He’s got a long list of stuff to get done before he heads out for school.”

“I understand, Mr. Wyatt.”

But as I reached in my pocket to retrieve my keys I lost my grip on the bag and it dropped to the grass.

“No!” I screeched as I hurried to reach for it, but I was too late.

Blake’s dad scooped down to pick it up as the pregnancy test rolled into the tall blades of grass. He clasped it between his gnarled knuckles as I stared in horror.

“What the hell is this?”

I couldn’t find any words to answer him.

“Are you pregnant, Sierra?”

I wanted to vomit. Again, not sure if it was from the baby or the terrible situation.

“Please don’t tell Blake. Please, I just need to talk to him.”

His eyes flared. “You’re pregnant?”

“I thought we had been careful,” I eked out a stupid defense. Now wasn’t the time to talk about how many time we had skipped the condoms in the heat of the moment. I never even thought it was possible for this to happen. We had been mostly responsible, but not enough.

He shook his head. “Unbelievable. Trapping my son with a baby.”

“What? No. It’s not a trap.” I reached for the test, but he held it out of distance from my fingertips.

He closed his eyes for a brief second. “Here’s what is going to happen, young lady. You’re going to go pack your things. Tell your aunt you were enrolled in an early program. You start driving.”

I shook my head. He was insane. “What are you talking about? No. I’m not doing that.”

He grabbed me by the arm, shoving me into the front of my vehicle. “You are.”

“I’m going to Saints College with Blake.”

“You’re going to any school but that one. I’ll pay for the transfer. I’ll pay for whatever I have to.”

The tears welled in my eyes before I could form words. “No. He has a right to know about his baby. I’m not going anywhere.”

He looked me in the eye. “What he has a right to is a future. A life of opportunity. You think I’m going to let my only son. The only person in this family with a real shot of leaving this village, squander it away because he knocked up some girl? I’m not.”

“I’m not some girl,” I fired back.

“He’ll forget about you in two weeks. That’s all he needs. Two weeks to get unbrainwashed. Football and college and you’ll be a memory, Sierra.”

“Why would you do this to your son? To your grandchild?” It made me sick making that connection, but it was true. I was carrying Roger Wyatt’s grandchild. His own flesh and blood.

“Because I love him more than anything. Anything. And he’s not yours. You hear me? Get your ass off this island.”

“Or what?” There was nothing he could say that would make me do this. I’d never leave Blake. I couldn’t pack up and pretend school started early. I had nowhere to go. No money. And now I was pregnant. Everything that was happening terrified me.

“I’ll tell him it isn’t his.” He snarled at me. “I’ll make him hate you. I’ll make him despise you. I’ll tell him that everyone has been talking about how you slept with Johnson Davis.”

“I did not. He knows I would never cheat on him.”

He shrugged. “Maybe you did. Maybe Blake needs to hear what a lying slut you really are.”

The tears mixed with my mascara and the burn was almost unbearable.

“Why? Why are you doing this to me?”

“Take the deal. Take my money. Get off the island by tomorrow. I’ll keep him so busy tonight he’ll be too tired to call you. I’ve got sanding that needs to be done.”

“We could have the baby together.” I tried to convince him. “Raise your grandchild like a family.”

I looked around desperately for Blake’s mother. She was my salvation. The one chance I had of staying. She would never send away her first grandchild—never.

He laughed. “Family? You don’t even know who your parents are. You’ve been raised by some woman you think is your aunt.”

The anger rammed through my lungs.

“Oh my God.”

“Yep. So pack up. And don’t communicate with my son. It’s the only chance you have of saving any reputation you have.”

“Martha will want to know,” I pleaded.

I saw the man I had begun to despise choke back a sob. It was instinct, but I rushed to his side. Carefully, I touched his shoulder.

His angry eyes peered at me.

“We haven’t told Blake yet.”

“Told him what?” I asked.

“She’s seen two specialists. Martha has stage four…”

“Oh my God.” I clasped his arm. “I’m so sorry. I-I can’t believe it.”

He straightened his shoulder and stepped out from my touch. “So your timing couldn’t be worse. Martha needs Blake now. She needs all of us.”

“But the baby could give her something to fight for. Don’t you think that’s powerful medicine?” I knew I was begging and pleading, but I was fighting for my life and for the place this baby deserved in its own family. Every time Mr. Wyatt opened his mouth I only fell deeper into the abyss of the hopelessness he created.

“You’re nothing but a scandal. Your shame is no one’s medicine,” he snarled. “I have a dying wife. Can’t you hear me? And I have a son who has a future. You don’t belong here. I have a family to take care of.” His legs stiffened. “Now go before Blake gets back.”

He kept talking, but I couldn’t listen to anymore. My body shut down. My emotions closed in on me.

He hated me. Actually despised me. And then he threw in the part about my parents and Aunt Lindy. If he was trying to derail me, it worked.

I drove home in a fog.

I slowly climbed the stairs and packed all the clothing I had in my bag.

That night I stuffed them into the back of my Jeep and left the island for the last time.

8

Blake

I could still taste her on my lips. Hear her in my ears.

I turned onto the dirt drive that I had called home. The lights were off in the boat barn.

I didn’t know if they’d ever be back on. I kept my head down as I passed the double doors that led inside where my dad used to work. I never went in there anymore. Cole had tried. My uncle had tried, but I kept the doors locked.

They kept reminding me how valuable the tools and the wood were inside, but I didn’t give a shit about the price of juniper boards—nor did I care about the two boats I kept hostage in there. I kept it sealed like a tomb.

I stumbled into the house, throwing my keys onto the table. I should pack up and head back to Orlando. There was enough to do for the team. I had rookies to study. Routes to plan with my receivers. I could meet with Coach. Work on my knee. I didn’t need this shit.

I wasn’t in the mood for a trip down memory lane. And yet, I was fucking driving down it a hundred miles an hour on auto pilot. Hell.

And Sierra was a brick wall I was going to crash into head first, sending me through the windshield with no seatbelt. I slammed my fist on the table.

There was only one way to get her out of my system.

One way to put the past behind me.

One way to drown out the memories.

One way to wipe her from my thoughts.

I pulled the top off a bottle of bourbon and took a swig. It burned my throat, but I didn’t care. I swallowed again. Before I knew it, the bottle was empty.

The glass hit the floor with a thud as I fell forward onto the couch. I didn’t know what time it was when I finally passed out, but the last thing I saw was Sierra’s lips. There wasn’t enough alcohol on this island to drink her out of my mind.

***

I reached for my head when the sun hit me in the face. Fuck. I walked to the kitchen and poured a glass of orange juice and ransacked the cabinets looking for aspirin.

I popped the tablets in my mouth and chugged them down. The old phone my parents had nailed to the wall was still attached. I couldn’t forget the number to Sierra’s aunt’s house if I wanted to. I tapped the digits onto the keypad and waited for her to answer.

“Hello?” She sounded sleepy. It was barely sunrise.

“Hey. It’s Blake.”

“Oh.”

“Look, about last night.” I ran my hand over my neck. The hangover stemmed from somewhere in the lower part of my skull.

“It shouldn’t have gone like that. I think we need a do-over.”

“A what?” she squeaked.

I couldn’t believe I was saying this shit. “A do-over. I’ll pick you up at seven thirty.”

“For what?” she questioned.

That was the question. Was I trying to prove to myself I was over her? Or that I could take her? Use her like she had used me? Prove that I could fuck her over and no longer needed her? Could I drive off this island like she had and not give a fuck about her?

“Come on, Sierra. It’s a date. I’ll pick you up and we’ll just pretend last night never happened.”

“I don’t understand. Last night wasn’t the best reunion. We haven’t talked in years and now it’s a date?”

“We’re older now, aren’t we?” Did she still know me so well that she could read through my bullshit reasons?

She paused. “I guess so.”

“Then just go with it, darlin’. See you tonight.”

I hung up before she could poke more holes in my sudden interest to see her.

9

Sierra

Promptly at seven thirty, the screen door to the kitchen screeched a little as Blake knocked and pulled the weathered door open to enter Aunt Lindy’s house. He had left his truck rumbling in the gravel drive.

“You ready?” he called into the house.

“I’m ready.” I had to stop myself from beaming at him.

Unlike the last time I’d seen him, he wasn’t wearing a scowl. This was different. Very different.

When he’d called this morning I’d been hesitant. Skeptical really, but here he was. Maybe he actually did want to forget the past.

His cologne wafted toward me and I tried not to let it intoxicate me. Everything about the man did. It always had.

I grabbed my bag and followed Blake to his truck.

“Where are we going?” I asked.

He looked over at me. “Thought we could take our own cruise. Just the two of us. Live music and drinks.”

“Ok.”

He helped me climb into the passenger side of his truck. It was a newer version of the one he’d had in high school. I noticed it was like driving a supped up computer system. I guessed AFA salaries could pay for things like that. On the flip side, my anchor salary wasn’t much. I was happy with what I made, but it was a far cry from luxury.

We headed to the creek where he kept his boat.

I felt as if I needed to say something to break the ice. To bridge the divide that had been between us, but I waited for his cues. The fact that we were on a date had to be enough for now.

Once we pushed off from the rickety pier, we cruised under the bridge and Blake pointed the vessel toward Oakton. Patches of marsh and abandoned crab pots littered the channel to downtown. I hadn’t been there in years. It was the closest town to Gull Island, but the quickest way to get there was by boat.

The sun was setting on Pelican Creek, and I was happy to get off the island for the night. I had been going stir crazy at Aunt Lindy’s.

Fifteen minutes later, the boat eased toward the small downtown waterfront dotted with shops and restaurants. Before I could even see it, I heard music from a live band.

“Is that Come Monday?” I asked.

He smiled. His teeth were perfect and straight. God, how many times had I fallen asleep thinking about his beautiful face?

“Yep. That’s the Fin Notes. They are a popular Jimmy Buffet cover band around here.”

I wasn’t sure if it was a jab that I didn’t know anything local anymore or if he was really just letting me know what was popular.

“They’re good,” I commented.

He careened the skiff to an open slip two piers down from the infamous Dock House, and jumped out to tie the boat to a cleat. The Dock House was crowded. Patrons had spilled out onto the boardwalk to make room for the dancing fans holding their drinks in the air.

“Can I get you something?” He finished tying his knot and turned his attention to me. He had been mostly quiet on the ride over.

“What do you recommend?”

I’d never actually been in the bar. It wasn’t the kind of place you could get in when you were underage and all the locals knew you and your boyfriend were in high school. We had tried a few times, but it had never worked. Everyone knew Blake was the county’s star quarterback back then.

“Long Island ice teas here are pretty good.”

“Isn’t that what you used to fix when we were in high school?” I asked.

I didn’t remember much about them other than that they tasted like ice tea, but made me drunk after just one. I was always a light weight.

“You always did like those fruity drinks.” He grinned.

“Hey, they’re good.”

“All right. I’ll be right back.”

The boat swayed gently in the slip while I waited for Blake.

I wondered how he existed like this. Famous and rich, but walking around in a T-shirt and pair of khaki shorts like any other local. But he wasn’t like anyone else. He had made a name for himself that was unrivaled by anyone in the state.

He was a top QB. He was revered in the sport. Anytime I saw an article with his name on it I always clicked on it. I watched every press conference. All his post-game interviews. He was pushed and pulled in every direction, and yet here he was like everyone else—as if he was a local just hanging out for the night. It was amazing.

I looked up when I saw him walking down the dock, carrying two Long Island ice teas. I took a moment to drink in every toned inch of the man towering over me.

“Can you give me a hand?” He motioned. “Don’t want to slosh all the alcohol out of these drinks before we get the chance to enjoy them.”

“These drinks are huge,” I remarked.

I lifted the lemon from the edge of the Styrofoam cup and squeezed it into the drink. I tipped the cup back and gulped down a few swallows, wanting to feel the warm numbness the alcohol would spread through my body

“Hold on, girl. These are strong.” He swooped in, trying to slow me down.

“I think I can handle my alcohol, thank you very much.” I knocked back another sip.

Blake laughed. “Maybe. But I don’t want to carry my passengers home.”

He took a sip of his tea, and I watched his eyes as they carried over my shoulder, down my collarbone, and dipped between my breasts.

“Are you checking me out?” I blurted out before I had time to cap the filter on my words.

“Darlin’, I’m just takin’ in the view.” He smiled. “You aren’t making this easy.”

“What does that mean?”

He sat and watched a sailboat cruise past them, heading toward the sound.

“Hey, Blake, you playin’ tonight?” a rowdy voice called from the crowd. They were teetering on the railing, which ran in front of the Dock House.

I looked at Blake quizzically.

“Nah, not tonight.” He raised his cup to them.

The guys started to laugh.

“Oh yeah, sorry, man. Looks like you’ve got other plans.” They staggered off to the dark side of the pier.

“What were they talking about?” I asked.

A smile slid across Blake’s lips. “I play a little. Sometimes on open mic night.”

“What? Are you any good?” I couldn’t help myself. I thought I knew everything about him, but he was revealing just how much I didn’t know. We had years to catch up on.

“Well, now I guess you’d have to tell me that. I just play.”

“When did you start playing? I’ve never heard you.”

He eyed me and I felt the guilt. This was the time when he was going to tell me I left before I got to know him. That there were parts of him I’d never bothered to find out.

He let out a long exhale. “A friend of mine in the music business started messing around with his guitar. I picked it up pretty quickly.”

I bit the inside of my lip. Of course. He had celebrity friends. Parties. Backstage passes. Island trips to the Caribbean. It was naïve of me to think that just because I watched his press conferences I still knew him.

I felt little needles of green envy surfacing at the thought of other people knowing a part of him I didn’t.

“I’d would love to hear you play some time. Will you tell me the next time you perform?”

“Uh, sure. I’ll let you know.”

Under the stars and low lights of the Dock House things should have felt normal. They should have felt familiar, but all I could think about was what had happened eight years ago. How much distance and history there was between us.

And suddenly, I found myself desperate to fix all of it. To discover who he was now. To know the man he had become. The problem was I had no idea where to start. I couldn’t get my bearings when he was near.

One look into those sexy eyes of his and my heart beat faster, my breath hitched, and my core twinged with deep desire. I wanted to know him in so many ways, but I was lost trying to find a starting point.

I cleared my throat. “So, what’s it like being a Thrasher?”

He chuckled over his drink. “Is that your version of an ice breaker?”

I blushed. “Yeah. I guess so. Football is always a winner with you, isn’t it?”

He stretched his legs forward, taking up most of the bow. “Darlin’, I love football. You’re right. That much hasn’t changed.”

“Of course not.” I felt stupid. “I just meant what’s it like in the AFA? Do you like playing in Orlando?”

“Yeah, I like it. It’s Florida. I have a killer team. Coach and I get along. Money isn’t bad.” He winked.

“So it’s what you want? What you’ve always wanted?”

“Hell yeah. It doesn’t get any better than what I have with the Thrashers.”

I liked the Long Island ice tea, the lemon especially. “And you don’t care about the pressure or all the press attention?”

He looked at me from the corner of his eye. Those beautiful eyes. “You know you’re starting to sound like a reporter.”

“Well I am a reporter, smart ass.”

He laughed. The sound was deep and rich. “So let’s talk about that.”

“I took a job in Dallas at a medium-sized station for that market. I was a news coordinator. At least that’s what they called me. It was a total grunt job, but I took any shift they gave me. After a year of proving I could work hard they gave me a floating reporter spot.” I paused to inhale my drink. “Two years later, one of the weekend anchors got food poisoning right before the late show and they threw me behind the desk. I was completely unprepared. I had no idea what I was doing up there, but the producer loved it and offered me one of the anchor slots.” My eyes lifted to his. “So you are looking at the sunny face of Wake Up Big D.” I smiled brightly, playing up the cheesiness of the title. I felt as if I was listing off my resume.

“No shit,” he whispered.

“No shit.”

“And to think you ran the school paper.”

“Oh please tell me the Pelican Gazette is still running.”

He grinned. “Oh yeah. I think it’s online now, though.”

I rolled my eyes. “Of course it is. Even on the island.” I sat back, feeling the boat rock slightly in the slip. It was soothing. “Blake, how do you do all this and the AFA? I don’t get it. Why come back here? Why try to blend in when you’re such a huge star?”

He looked at me and I felt a little quake inside.

“It’s home, Sierra.”

I felt the guilt take root under my skin. He loved this place so much. And I couldn’t figure it out. I never had been able to. My eyes drifted to the bar.

“You want to go up there?” He must have noticed me eyeing the dancing partiers.

“Do you want to go up there?” I countered. I remembered having to coax him onto the dance floor at prom.

“Come on.” He took the drink from my hand and lodged it in a drink holder. The next thing I knew he had hoisted me onto the pier, locked his fingers through mine, and was leading me to the music.

10

Blake

The song slowed as soon as Sierra and I were within five feet of the deck.

Her eyes sank into mine and she bit her bottom lip. Fuck. Why was she making this so difficult?

I tried not to look in her eyes. Before the Fin Notes launched into the chorus she was wrapped around my torso, her cheek resting against my chest. This was all more than what I bargained for. It had to be the strong drinks that had her nestled against me.

I let my hand glide down her back until it palmed the curve along the small of her back, fitting her snugly to my body. She felt like velvet under my rough hands. My chest tugged to take a deep breath. What in the hell was happening?

“This is nice,” Sierra murmured.

We swayed slowly, but it seemed as if the world had stopped.

I nodded, not wanting to confirm the words out loud. I reached for her hair and closed my eyes as my fingers coiled along the strands. This was dangerous.

She had always been able to do this to me. Make my cock ache. Make my thoughts turn to images of her under me. I had a strong visual of her lips wrapped around the base of my dick while I pumped in and out of her. And she always gave me what I wanted—she’d let me come deep in her throat. Her eyes misted with the intensity and the pleasure, but she never stopped until she had licked every drop from my head. She always made sure I was satisfied. And, how could I not be with those sweet lips sucking me? She had always been a good girl—a sweet girl—but the night she gave me her virginity it was as if she had given me the keys to an unopened box. A box that contained the most alluring intoxicating siren my cock and my heart had ever known.

The music faded from the stage. The song ended and I backed up too quickly, knocking Sierra off balance.

“Whoa.” I snaked an arm around her waist to steady her. “I told you those Long Island ice teas are no joke.”

She giggled and looked up at me. Those blue eyes stopped me in my tracks. She was drunk. She never could handle those drinks. But that wasn’t the only thing I saw in her eyes. Thirst. Hunger. Lust.

Fuck.

“I’m getting you home.” I ushered her along the boardwalk.

“So you do want to take me home?” she purred.

She looked happier than I had seen her since we’d run into each other again. The drink must have had a way of softening her. Maybe it was the drinks or maybe she was starting to have fun with me. I wasn’t sure.

“Already?” She pretended to pout.

“Yes, now.”

“I’m totally fine.” Sierra giggled.

“You’re drunk. Time to go.”

“But we just got here. One dance and you’re done?”

“Something like that.”

I hauled her down the boardwalk and lifted her into the skiff.

I sat her in the seat next to me so I could keep an eye on her. The last thing I wanted was for her to tip overboard. I kept one hand firmly planted on her hip. She sighed at my touch.

I shook my head and cranked the engine.

She was either making this way too easy or way too hard. With her nuzzled into my chest, I couldn’t decide which.

***

I didn’t say a fucking word the entire ride home from the boat.

I parked just off Lindy’s back porch and carried Sierra inside. I deposited her onto the couch in the living room.

She moaned lightly and smiled. “I had fun. I think I feel another dance coming on.” She tried to stand.

“Whoa darlin’. You’re going to take a nose dive if you do that.”

It was hard not to laugh at her. She was blitzed from only one drink.

“Me too. Get some sleep.”

Her hand flew out and latched on to my leg when I tried to turn. “Are you leaving?” she asked.

I thought about how Sierra’s hair had felt. How she’d melted into my chest. How she’d wrapped her hot little body around me when we’d danced. Damn it.

“Yeah. I think so.”

“Why?” Her eyes had a way of pulling me in.

“You’re drunk.” I pointed at her.

“So?”

“So. Even if I was thinking about taking you to bed again, it wouldn’t be like this.”

Because that’s what she was thinking. One drink. One slow dance. One cruise alone and she’d have me back where she wanted. In her bed. That she would be the one to fucking seduce me.

That wasn’t how this was going down.

“Didn’t we used to have amazing sex?” Her words were slow.

My cock twitched slightly. “Yeah. We did.”

My head flashed with an image of her tits. They were fucking incredible. I used to suck and bite them until she screamed my name in the back of my truck and my ears echoed with her voice.

That was when we had to sneak around. Sex in my truck. Sex behind a hidden sand dune. Sex on the boat if we could get out for the day.

But never this. Never in a house when we were the only two home. It was what I’d always wanted—to fuck her epically. To take her on her knees. To fuck her every which way I had invented and some I hadn’t yet. Alone, where she could suck my cock all night and I could bury myself inside her over and over again until the sun rose over the water. I’d had it so bad for this girl.

Her eyes lifted to mine. “Have you thought about what it would be like now?”

I knelt next to her, close enough my lips almost touched her ear. I brushed her silky hair to the side.

“It would be so fucking epic you’d never want another man inside you.”

She whimpered.

I stood, her eyes following me.

“Good night, Sierra.”

I walked out, letting the screen door creak behind me. I tried to rub the throbbing ache out of my cock as I strolled to the truck. I was so fucking hard I didn’t know how I managed to put one foot in front of the other. That girl was killing me.

11

Sierra

The next morning, I brushed my teeth with a tightly wrapped towel around my body. The hot shower hadn’t exactly washed away the humiliation or the hangover. I was pretty sure I had thrown myself at Blake last night.

I spit into the sink and rested the toothbrush in the holder. What in the hell was I thinking? I was mortified. And part of me was still turned on. Did he want me? Was it possible that he still wanted me after all this time?

His words still buzzed in my ear.

I retrieved a pair of tweezers from my cosmetic bag and critically studied my brow line. I had let my time in Aunt Lindy’s house get to me. When was the last time I had a facial or a wax?

I exhaled into the mirror as I wiped on a second layer of mascara.

Had he taken any of it seriously? I doubted it. Women were always throwing themselves at him. I saw it after every game. He had websites dedicated to him, created by a hot female fan base. There was a reason he was one of the AFA’s most notorious bachelors—he refused to get serious with any one person, and was known for sleeping around.

He wasn’t the sweet guy I had once known. I had to remember that.

But, I had seen a glimmer of the man I’d once known last night while we’d been dancing. His fingers had wound through my hair. He smelled like the old Blake I’d known—like a mix of juniper and mint. I’d always thought he smelled that way because of working with the wood from the boats, but now I knew it was him. That heavenly mixture that made me lose all logic and rational thought. As my cheek pressed to his T-shirt it had all come rushing back—the way we used to be.

He’d held me close, as if he cared. As if the past eight years weren’t a huge wedge between us. As if somewhere under his tough exterior he was still the first guy I’d ever loved. The one I’d given myself to.

He had to be in there somewhere.

I turned off the light and walked downstairs to make a pot of coffee. The house was a complete disaster. The beach charity foundation was supposed to be here before lunch to take the furniture in the front room. Aunt Lindy had one of those ridiculous church organs that weighed a thousand pounds. I had to get it out of here.

There were a dozen other pieces I was going to send with them too. I started tagging the furniture that was mismatched. Some I didn’t recognize. She had added many things to the house over the years.

It wasn’t as if there was a handbook to guide me through this process. I was overwhelmed with the house. My aunt had been a packrat. Only, I never realized it until I started opening cabinets and drawers. She had hidden her secret for years. I was only now realizing what a serious problem it was.

But she wasn’t here to lecture. She wasn’t here to tell me what was valuable and what wasn’t. I couldn’t ask her what I should keep. And maybe if I had been a better niece I would have known all these things.

I would have known her wishes. I would know what to do with her rhinestone jewelry and the enormous collection of silk scarves that filled a trunk in the attic.

Instead, I was the girl who had let Roger Wyatt scare me off this island. I had let that man keep me away. The fear he’d planted in my soul had separated me from the only woman who had cared enough to take me in and raise me.

And he’d kept me from the only person I’d ever truly loved.

I filled the coffee pot and poured the water into the tank in the back. Within minutes the kitchen smelled like fresh-brewed coffee. I inhaled a cup while I sat at the bay window, looking out over the sound.

He had stolen so much from me that day. What was worse were the seeds of doubt he had sprouted in me about my family.

I knew exactly what he had tried to imply. That Aunt Lindy wasn’t my biological aunt. That the entire story of how I ended up on this island was just that—a story—another ghost tale passed down to a scared child.

He stole my courage that day. I had never asked Aunt Lindy the truth. I didn’t want to know, even though in some deep crevice of my heart I did. But it wasn’t any of his damn business. He had no right to throw that in my face, or undercut my aunt. All she had ever done was love me.

I sat at her table, surrounded by her things. All I could think about was when she’d sat in the front row of church for the Christmas pageant. How she’d stitched my fairy Halloween costume together by hand. She had tried to teach me to bake and the art of making sun tea. She showed me the best times to find sand dollars on the Cape and how to coax a hermit crab out of its shell. During the summer, she helped me line the bookshelf in my room with fireflies in Mason jars. We would always let their sluggish bodies out in the morning.

I felt the well of tears.

Somewhere in this house I would find the answers. My history was here.

But it was never up to Roger Wyatt to hand me those answers. Never.

Things could have been so different if I hadn’t left. If I hadn’t been a scared little pregnant girl.

But that man had scared the hell out of me.

I put the mug down. Maybe it was time I paid him a visit.

I grabbed my bag and keys and drove toward Roger Wyatt’s house.

12

Blake

I heard wheels crunching over the gravel and stepped out onto the porch to see who was pulling up the drive. I had a hot cup of coffee in my hands.

It was Sierra. I felt the jolt between my ribs.

She stepped from the car. “Good morning.”

“How’s your head?” I grinned. She looked fucking adorable. Her blond hair fell over her shoulders. She was wearing cut off shorts, so short that if she bent over I’d see my favorite slice of heaven. My dick hardened instantly. She was a damn she-devil that one. All she had to do was show up and instantly I wanted to kiss her until I had her stripped bare. I wanted to kiss her lips, her tits, her sweet skin and her legs all the way to that honey-soaked paradise.

“Are you staying here?” she asked. “Is this where you are for the summer?”

I nodded. “Yeah. Why?”

She looked confused. I saw her eye the boat barn.

“I actually wasn’t expecting to see you. I came to talk to your dad, but maybe another time would be better.” She stepped back toward the driver side.

“Hey, wait.” I jogged down the stairs. She stopped. “That’s going to be nearly impossible, darlin’.”

“Why?”

“My dad died three months ago.”

Her hand flew to her mouth. “What? I hadn’t heard.”

I shoved my hands in my front pockets. “Yeah. Heart attack while he was running the sander. Uncle Billy found him.”

Her eyes softened. “I’m sorry, Blake. Really I am.”

“Thanks.”

We walked to the porch and sat on the top step.

“I can’t believe I didn’t know,” she whispered.

“It’s not like you’re around here. How would you have known?”

“The news, maybe?” She looked at me and I saw the concern in her eyes. I didn’t want pity from her. I’d had my share of condolences.

“Happened during the draft. It didn’t get any coverage. I wanted it that way. I hate it when the press follows me. And they aren’t welcome on the island. I didn’t need any damn reporters at the funeral. He wouldn’t have wanted that either.”

“Right. I get that.”

“It was simple.” I didn’t know why I started in on the details. “He wanted a plain juniper box. He’s in the family cemetery next to my mom.”

Her eyes flashed with pain at the mention of my mother. I swore it was like one minefield after another between us. We couldn’t get away from the explosives before another one was set off. And we did it too each other, reminding the other of the pain from when she had left.

“God, your mom, Blake…” She hung her head. “I always liked her. She was always so sweet to me.”

“Probably because she needed another girl around here,” I joked, but I didn’t feel the lightness of it. My mom had loved Sierra. She had been crushed when Sierra had taken off and then we’d gotten her diagnosis.

I cleared my throat. “You said you were here to see my dad?”

She suddenly looked uncomfortable. “It was nothing.”

“It had to be something for you to drive over this early.”

She shook her head. “I wanted to know what he thought about some of Aunt Lindy’s things. That’s all.”

“Like what?”

“I—uh—I don’t want to bother you with it. I had no idea you were dealing with all this.” She brushed off her legs and stood from the porch. “I’ll take care of it. The beach charity van is going to be at the house soon anyway.”

“What are you doing with Lindy’s house?” I asked.

I had struck a nerve. “Sell it I guess.”

“You’re going to sell it? That house had been in her family for a hundred years.”

“I know how old it is. Do you have an issue with it?”

“It shouldn’t go to an outsider. That’s all I’m trying to fucking say,” I barked.

“And just how do you categorize me?” she fumed.

“What are you talking about?”

“Me. Where do you think I fit in?”

“You’re an islander, Sierra. At least you used to be.”

“Yeah,” she whispered. “Used to be.”

She walked to the car. “I’m sorry about your dad. Really.”

The ignition started and I watched as she rolled down the windows before backing out of the driveway.

I strolled over to her door. “Hey. What do you say we do something later?” I put my hand on the window edge.

“What? This again? I think last night proved we are a colossal disaster.”

“No Long Island ice teas this time.”

She chewed her lip. “I don’t know.”

“How about this? Let’s go to the Cape for the day. It’s hot. You shouldn’t be locked up inside cleaning up shit. Let’s take the boat out. Remind you that you really are an islander.”

“But—the charity—”

I shrugged. “Leave them a note. I’ll pick you up on the pier in an hour.”

I saw the corners of her pink lips curl. Damn she was still gorgeous.

“Ok. I can do that. And I’ll pack some sandwiches?”

I slapped the side of her car. “You better. I eat a lot. See you in an hour.”

I watched as she backed all the way out of the drive and realized I needed to get the cooler ready. I had a full day of drinking to do.

13

Sierra

I placed the open slices of bread on the cutting board and furiously spread mayonnaise and mustard over them.

I couldn’t believe Roger Wyatt was dead. The man I blamed for ruining my life wasn’t here anymore. It was a lot to take in. What did that mean for Blake? He was dealing with the death of his father. I had missed so many events in his life.

I hurried to wrap the turkey sandwiches and tuck them inside plastic sleeves. He would be here any minute. I couldn’t think about Blake’s dad or the past. Today was all about the future.

***

I watched Blake anchor his boat on a secluded end of the bank where few tourists visited. I wondered if he tried to stay away from potential fans on purpose. I was constantly at odds trying to figure him out. He had to be feeling that way too. Was that what this was? An attempt to make me fall in love with the island again so I wouldn’t sell the house?

Light bounced off the water and caught the glistening of a swimming school of fish. Sometimes wild ponies could be spotted on top of the dunes, playing a game of tag. I peered at the horizon, looking for the horses.

It had been eight years since I had been to the Cape, but Aunt Lindy had taught me well how to pack for a day at the beach. I’d never forgotten her lessons. I had a cooler full of drinks, sandwiches, and suntan lotion. Blake smiled as he loaded the cooler and other bags onto his boat.

“You know I usually just bring a six-pack of beer and sometimes a bag of chips.”

“I wanted to make sure we had everything we needed.” Maybe three bags were too many for a day trip, but I wasn’t about to admit that to him.

When we anchored, he helped me spread the blanket on a stretch of beach a few feet from where the waves were lapping against the shore.

I sprawled out on the blanket with a book while Blake started on a beer. I kept reading the same page over and over again. I couldn’t get past the second paragraph. Every time I looked up at Blake, all I could focus on were the endless amounts of chiseled muscles. There was something mesmerizing about his bronze skin, and my imagination was taking over as I watched him rub more lotion on his arms and chest.

“Either you can’t take your eyes off me, or you want some of this. Do you want me to put some on you?” Blake held out the lotion bottle with a coy grin. “The sun is serious today. I would hate for you to get burned.”

“All right.” It made sense. I didn’t want to get a sun burn this late in the summer.

I rolled onto my stomach, allowing him full access to my back. He poured a generous amount of coconut-scented oil in his palm. He rubbed his hands together, working the lather all over my back.

I closed my eyes as the circular motion of his hand deepened while he explored the curves of my hips. He pulled the ties that fastened my bikini at the middle of my back and laid them on either side of my ribs. I relaxed into the blanket as he massaged the untouched skin with more intensity, a move that almost brought a moan from my throat. He inhaled while his thumbs worked the small of my back, slowly dipping below my waistline.

“How does that feel?” he teased.

“Uh-huh,” was all I could manage to stammer.

“Is that all you have to say?” he asked. His hands made their way down my thigh, pressing in all the right spots.

“Do you want me to tell you to stop?” I giggled, hoping he would keep going.

It took everything in me to keep my hands and mouth off this man.

Blake laughed and, with one firm hand, pulled the edge of my sun-kissed shoulder so that I rolled toward him. He gathered the scraps of bikini fabric clinging to my skin, letting his fingers brush across the pink flesh of my breasts, and tossed the top over our heads.

I’d never felt so beautifully exposed before.

I gasped as his mouth found mine. His lips were firm and urgent, but I could feel the want and longing lingering between us. Playful teasing turned hot the instant he bit down on my bottom lip, just enough to make me catch my breath.

I yielded to his tongue and tugged him down against my breasts. His skin was hot from the sun, and I dug my fingers into his shoulders, as if that would keep me from spiraling out of control. Yes, I wanted this, but I hadn’t thought it through. Everything felt too good to stop. I could taste the salt on his neck as my lips grazed over his shoulder and worked up toward his ear.

Arching toward him, I drank in the feeling of his rough hands exploring the inches of my exposed skin. Gradually, his lips trailed down the line of my neck until he was hovering over my breasts, casting a shadow on the creamy skin that only a few minutes ago had been covered in a bright pink bikini top.

He stopped, and for a second, I worried something was wrong. I watched him, his eyes raked over me, taking in the curves of my body, my golden hair splayed all around the beach blanket, the rhythmic motion of my chest breathing in and out, and my eyes. I wanted him. I hoped he could see it. Everything happening between us right now felt hot, intense, and like we were in the same place, for the first time in eight years.

“You’re fucking gorgeous, Sierra.”

He reached for my hands and brought them over my head, nestling them in the sunbaked sand off the edge of the blanket. I lightly pulled against his grip, wiggling closer to him, but steadily resisted the urge to struggle against his control.

“Don’t move,” he ordered.

I nodded.

His teeth grazed my neck then returned to my breasts. I cried out when his teeth pulled my nipple between them. He bit down, sending an exquisite pressure pulsing through my body.

“Oh God,” I moaned.

It only made him suck and bite harder. My hips jerked involuntarily and I felt the wetness between my legs.

My back arched so that our bodies were locked together, separated by only a tiny bikini bottom and a pair of swimming trunks. I smiled. I could feel exactly what I was doing to him. His cock was solid and long.

He groaned.

“I think I’m going to have to fuck you right here. Sex on the beach?”

I nodded. “I want you too.” I breathed, knowing I was making a mistake, but I couldn’t stop myself.

I wiggled enough so he could pull the strings on the side of my bikini. He tossed the scrap of fabric out of his way.

I didn’t care about the sun beating down on us, or the sand all around. My body was gliding against his. His hands were all over me. His tongue in an out of my mouth. Covering my nipples. Gliding over my stomach.

“Fuck,” he growled, pushing my legs wide.

“Ohh,” I whimpered. My head turned to the sound and that’s when I saw it.

The tide.

It was coming in, but I was too late.

Before we had a chance to move out of the ripping current’s path, we were both soaked by the unexpected wave. Startled I scrambled for my bikini as it drifted past me before the surf took it out to sea.

“Shit,” he murmured as we both leapt forward to save what was left of our beach site.

He cleared his throat and reached for the drenched blanket and the sunscreen. Stuffing them in the bag, he turned toward me. I was busy refastening my suit.

“Why don’t we find another beach? It looks like this one is going to wash away soon. I’ll load this stuff on the boat and we can find another spot.”

“No.” I snatched the blanket out of the bag and tried to wring some of the water out of it. “I think we should go back.”

I was instantly sorry I had snapped at Blake, but the shock of the wave seemed to whip me back into reality and back into control of my hormones. I had almost had sex on the beach. In broad daylight like an irresponsible eighteen-year-old girl. What in holy hell was wrong with me?

14

Blake

We loaded the remainder of the beach bags and cooler, neither one of us saying anything to the other. I started the small twin power engine and careened the boat back to the docks. With one eye on the nearing horizon, I tried to focus on the boats in the marina and not the ache in my cock.

I had been seconds from what I wanted. Fucking seconds.

As soon we reached the pier, I could tell she was pissed. As she walked past me to put her bags on the dock, I could see the frustration in her eyes.

“Something wrong, darlin’?”

“No.” She hauled the bags up on her shoulders.

“You sure? Because you haven’t said one word since the tide interrupted us.”

“It’s just. I just … I hate being startled. And you know, the whole thing was a surprise to me anyway,” Sierra blurted out.

“Believe me, if I could control the tides I would.”

“That’s not what I’m talking about.” She lowered her voice.

“I can take you inside right now and finish what we started.” I eyed her.

She blushed. “For what? Why? Sleeping together again? You think that’s a good idea?”

I tied off the boat and stepped toward her.

“One of my favorite things to do.” I winked.

She slapped at my bare chest. “Shut up. Just take your sexy smile and winking and that body and shut up, Blake.”

My eyebrows rose high. “You have a problem with me or something?”

She dropped all the bags. “I do. A big problem.”

“Then let’s hear it. What is it? What is it I’ve done to the high and mighty Sierra Emory?”

“That.” She pointed, her eyes an icy blue. “I knew it was there. You are mad at me. And as much as I want to believe the guy I used to be with is underneath that hot body of yours, you’re actually a huge dick. Huge.”

“Are you saying I have a nice dick because I think you already know that.”

“See?” she fumed. “Complete dick.”

“Is that so?”

“Yeah. It is. I don’t know what this is. You want revenge sex? Is that it?”

“Maybe.” I admitted it. I didn’t give a fuck. I wanted her so badly I couldn’t name it, label it, or dissect it. It was the kind of want that made my veins shatter.

Her eyes widened. “You weren’t actually supposed to say yes to that.”

“Why not? We’re getting everything out in the open aren’t we?”

I stepped off the pier. She was in the backyard now, backing up toward the porch.

“So that’s what this was? Not rekindling what we had, but revenge? You wanted to sleep with me to prove some kind of point?”

I was close enough to pull her into my arms. I wrapped a hand tightly around her waist. She stiffened against me.

“I do have a point to prove,” I growled.

I thought I felt her go weak in my arms.

“Wh-what is that?”

“That if I fuck you again, you’ll never want another man. That one time with me will ruin you from ever wanting someone else.”

“You’re arrogant,” she whispered.

“Arrogant because I know it’s true.” My lips dipped to her ear. “I’ll be so deep inside you, baby, so fucking hard. And you like it slow, right?” I brushed my finger over her bare shoulder. “I’ll ruin you.”

She went silent.

I let her go and she staggered backward.

“You are an ass, Blake Wyatt. A complete and total ass.”

I chuckled. “Before you leave this island you’ll be knocking on my door. I’m sure of it.”

I turned for the boat. She was under my skin. Maybe more than I was under hers. If I didn’t get out of here now I would pick her up and take her upstairs to her bedroom—somewhere I’d never been.

“That’s not happening,” she called after me.

I waved over my shoulder. “See you later, darlin’.” I could hear her fuming before I started the engine. I put the boat in reverse, leaving a very hot and bothered blonde in my wake.

15

Sierra

Just like that he was gone. The boat turned past the marina and I couldn’t see him anymore. I stomped up the stairs. I didn’t know if I was more pissed that he would say something like that to me, or the fact that I was on the verge of begging for him to make good on his promise.

I dumped the drenched beach bag in the utility sink and pulled out the soaking wet towels to hang outside. I plucked four clothes pins from the line and clipped them to the colorful edges of towels. I ducked around the billowing towel, shimmied out of my cutoff shorts, and pulled the tank top over my head. Everything I had was coated in wet sand. I shook the clothes to loosen the sand stuck to the fabric. There was no point. I knew it would be tomorrow before I could properly shake these out.

I leaned against the tree on the other side of the clothesline. I closed my eyes as images of his hands and hard chest washed through my mind like those unwanted waves.

I kicked off my sandy flip-flops by the back door, and traipsed into the house in search of some ice tea. I grabbed a tall glass from the cabinet and filled it with ice and a few lemon slices.

I had left my phone on the counter. There was a message from work. I listened to the voicemail.

“Hey Sierra. I know you’re on leave, but we need you back at the station. Turns out Wendy needs to take maternity leave early and there isn’t another anchor we can get on short notice to fill in for her. Give me a call. It’s Brody, by the way.”

I groaned. Work was the last thing on my mind. They would have to wait until this tea was gone. I had too many things going on.

It wasn’t like I was trying to take advantage of the station. If anything I had been terrified to leave. But I hadn’t made it back for the funeral and I didn’t have any other family members. It seemed like a good idea to roll all my sick time and funeral time into one big summer break.

The head of human resources said she understood. As the sole heir, I had a lot of shit to sort through. But time was shrinking. The house was still seventy-five percent full and I hadn’t even tried to list it yet with a realtor.

I slumped onto the couch.

And Blake.

If I thought somehow I could right that wrong, I was hopeless.

The cruises. The drinks. The day at the beach—it was all to get in my pants for some kind of final goodbye vengeance sex.

My skin tingled. My core ached.

Why did it sound like the hottest night of my life?

I picked up the phone and waited for Brody to answer.

“Sierra, hey girl. Glad you called me back. When are you coming back?”

“I still have two weeks. I was planning on using them,” I replied.

“Right. You got my message about Wendy, right? She has to go on bed rest next week.”

“Bed rest? Is it that serious?”

“Uhh. I don’t think so.”

“Did you ask her?” I wasn’t surprised he didn’t know any details.

“Look, it isn’t my business. I just work the schedule.”

I sighed. “So you need me back a week early?”

“We do, babe. Can you come home?”

Home. It was a funny word lately. Dallas was where my apartment was. Where I kept my massive shoe collection and my journalism school diploma. The island wasn’t home anymore. But the memories had started to seep in in surprising ways. Familiar scents. Comfortable accents. Views that soothed my soul.

“Yeah, of course.” I tried to smile. “Tell Wendy not to worry about it.”

“Good. I knew you’d come through. We’ve missed you around here.”

“Thanks. I’ve missed it too.”

“See you next week.”

“Yep. See you soon.”

I hung up and realized my job of going through Aunt Lindy’s house had just become unsurmountable. There was no way I was going to get everything done in a week. I was crazy to think it would have been done in two.

That meant I was going to have to come back.

16

Blake

I pressed my palms into the sawhorses and closed my eyes. I couldn’t believe I was in here.

All I could smell was sawdust and turpentine. Everywhere I looked I saw him. Climbing the ladder with a bucket of paint. Arguing in the office about a bill someone refused to pay. But they were only memories. Dad was gone. He wasn’t going to barge in here and tell me I was doing this all wrong. He would know a better way to do it. He always had a better way than I did.

I picked up a tattered piece of sand paper and braced it between my hand and a piece of juniper. I smoothed the wood with the rough surface. The more I moved it back and forth, the sleeker the wood looked. I ground it harder, repeating the motion.

I got lost in it. The movement. The stillness of the barn. What it meant that I had opened the doors to his sanctuary.

Ten minutes later, Cole entered the boathouse.

He stopped a few feet short of where I was sanding. “I can’t believe it.”

“Don’t say anything.” I gritted my teeth.

He folded his arms over his chest. “You weren’t in the house. Didn’t think you’d actually be in here.”

I nodded. “Needed something to do.”

I heard him break the seal on a beer. “Need one of these?”

I grinned. “Hell yeah I do.”

I threw the sand paper down and took one of the beers. “Thanks.”

“So, you opened the barn back up. Does that mean anything?” he asked, taking a seat on one of the empty sawhorses. His feet shuffled over wood shavings that littered the barn floor.

“No.” I chugged. “Means I needed to sand this juniper.”

“Right. Right. So it has nothing to do with a certain blonde who is leaving the island?”

My eyes shot to his. “What are you talking about?”

“I ran into Shirley when I bought the beer. She said Sierra has to head back to Texas in a couple of days. Something about work. You didn’t know?”

“Huh. No, I hadn’t heard. Good for her.”

“Man, really?”

“What the fuck do you want me to do? She doesn’t want to stay. Some people leave and come back. Some don’t.”

“And you’re giving up on her? She came back, man. She’s trying to do the right thing.”

I tipped the cold bottle to my lips. “The right thing? She was forced to come back here. Don’t cut her any slack. She’s here because she has to be.”

Cole shook his head. “I knew her in high school too. Don’t forget that.”

“And you were here when she left.”

“I was. But she was a kid. We all were. You seriously going to hold a grudge like that?”

“No. I don’t give a shit what she does.”

“You’re not going to call her?” Cole grilled me. “Because that’s what this is all about. The sanding, opening the barn, the pissy mood—it’s Sierra.”

I shook my head. “Nah, it was a mistake. I shouldn’t have taken her out to the Dock House or the Cape. I don’t know what the hell I was thinking opening up that shit back up with her.”

I kept my head down and focused on smoothing out each bump in the plank’s grain. Sanding was good. It kept me from thinking. But Cole was pushing hard to make me face things about Sierra I didn’t want to admit.

“Ok, ok. I’m just trying to help you out. Seems like you’re making a mistake from where I stand.”

“Stay out of it, Cole. It’s complicated.” I groaned.

Cole threw his hands in the air and took a step backward. “I’m out. You do what you’re going do.”

“Thanks. I think I can handle Sierra.”

He turned before he walked out of the doors. “For the record, it’s good to see the lights on in here again.”

I did my best impression of a smile. “Thanks, man.”

“You bet.”

I wiped my forehead with the back of my wrist and tossed the sandpaper in the open trash can. I had already gone through two sheets on just a few boards. They were rubbed raw. And underneath it all I felt the same way. Raw. Open. Staring pain and grief in the face under the dark cloak of uncertainty.

Sierra. Fuck. What was I going to do about that girl? The vein along the side of my neck pulsed with anger. Why should I be surprised she was running so soon? Wasn’t that what she did? She’d left at the most painful time in my life. Right as my parents sat me down and told me my mother had only months to live.

And where was the girl who loved me? The one who had my back? The one who pushed me toward my dreams? She had vanished like foam on the beach. Washed out like a cold wave on a December beach.

And that’s what she would do again. Leave.

But for fake’s sake, I couldn’t stop thinking about her, or about what had happened in that cove on the beach. She was infuriating, stubborn, quick-tempered, argumentative, and temporary. Had always been—I just didn’t know it back then.

I picked up another prickly sheet of unused paper and laid it rough side down on the next board.

I had plenty of experience with summer flings. At twenty-six, I had spent my share of summers fucking vacationing girls at the beach and I knew the drill. Someone always got too attached, no matter what the upfront agreement was. And it was never me. The last time I’d even thought about feeling something toward a woman ended the day she drove over the bridge.

I sanded deeper and longer strides into the plank. This was the way it had to be.

Thrashers groupies followed me to every city. They waited for me in hotel lobbies and outside of the locker room. And hell, they were smart women. Beautiful women. Women who would have done anything to make me happy. And for night I let them. But that’s all I could give them—one night.

There was no reason to get involved with her further. She had called me out on the revenge sex, and I’d managed to stay away for a few days. Our trip down memory lane was over.

Flashes of her long legs crept into my mind. Those lips, and the way she dug her nails into my back. The way she purred under my touch and leaned into my body every time I got close. That innocent look she still had. The good girl image with bright blue eyes that screamed a purity so damn alluring I wanted another look. Another touch. Another taste of the girl I had made mine all those years ago. Because when it came down to it, she had been mine. She was mine first. She had been untouched and naïve. She’d needed me. She’d depended on me. And I’d protected her as if she were a treasure. My treasure.

Oh hell, what am I doing? I tossed the paper on the floor and grabbed me keys. There was a hot-tempered blonde I needed to see.

17

Sierra

There wasn’t much else I could do. I realized I had to accept defeat. I may never finish clearing out the house or sell it. Maybe I should call one of those estate companies and have them liquidate everything for me.

The thought of having complete strangers go through Aunt Lindy’s personal items didn’t feel right. I couldn’t do that to her.

I may have let her down the last few years of her life, but I didn’t have to let her down in death.

My shoulders sank as I stared into the bottom of my glass of wine. I sat on the back porch, watching boats cruise past.

I wondered how many times she had done this before she’d died. Sat in this exact wicker rocker and watched life sail by. I took another sip and reached for the chilled bottle next to me.

It was the kind of sunset I was going to drink through. I didn’t see any other way.

I heard the familiar sound of tires on gravel and looked up when Blake’s truck rolled into view.

I hadn’t seen him in a few days. I thought it was for the best. Things had gotten too messy. Too complicated. Too hard.

“Thought you’d already have your suitcase on the porch,” he barked, walking toward me, taking huge strides.

“Hi to you too,” I sassed.

But my chest tightened when I saw him. His T-shirt clung to his chest and it was hard to look away from the sculpted lines of his arms. Damn it. Why did he always have to be so hot?

“So you’re just going to run away again?” he accused. There was fire in his eyes.

He stood six inches from me and I could feel the heat radiating from his glare. It poured off his body in ripples of fevered anger.

I made the mistake of looking up.

“How did you know I was leaving?”

“Just answer me. Are you taking off and selling Lindy’s house?”

I placed the wine glass down and rose to meet him. “What difference does it make to you?”

“Because I actually give a shit about this island. I care if developers come in and get ahold of this property. I know you don’t. You can’t get out of here fast enough.”

My hands flew to my hips. “I don’t get how you can pretend to know so much about my motivations.”

He snorted. “Baby, I know every play you’ve ever made.”

My spine tingled. A shiver ran from one shoulder to the other. He had no idea what he was talking about. And I was just tipsy enough to tell him to get the hell of my porch.

“If you’re done lecturing me about the sanctity of the island, you can go. I don’t need this.”

“I’ll pay you for it.”

“What?” My eyes almost reeled back in my head.

“What do you want for the house? I’ll pay you cash.”

I shook my head. “You are not buying Aunt Lindy’s house.”

“Why not? You sure as hell don’t want it. You’ll take any excuse to get off this piece of sand.”

“That’s not true.”

“Isn’t it? Isn’t that what you did eight years ago?” His eyes bored into mine. “You ran. You took off. Let everyone down. And you never looked back. Don’t pretend you give a fuck now. I’ll buy the house and then we can make sure we never run into each other again. Deal?”

“Stop. Just stop it, Blake.”

“Why? Did I push you too hard toward the truth?” His lips formed a snarl.

The wine whirled through my empty stomach. “You want to know what happened? Is that what you want?” I baited him, when I knew I shouldn’t. But I was on a roll and couldn’t stop myself.

He chuckled. “I know exactly what happened. But sure, tell me.”

He mocked me. He belittled me. He pushed me to the edge and I came out swinging.

“I was pregnant, Blake. I was pregnant with your baby.” The words slipped from my lips and the porch was suddenly quiet. The only thing I could hear was my heart beating so loudly it filled my ears with the sounds of thumping blood.

“That’s a lie.”

I hung my head. One tear slipped and then another. I fell into the rocker. Eight years of hidden secrets and anguish came pouring out. Eight years of lies. Eight years of loneliness. The humiliation and the fear pooled in my stomach. I was twisted in knots of anguished emotion.

“It’s not a lie. It’s what happened. I was pregnant. We were going to have a baby.” My soft words lingered between us. “I left the island pregnant, Blake.”

I looked up into his gray-blue eyes. They were cloudy like the sea when rain washes over the waves.

“Sierra.” He dropped to his knees.

18

Blake

“Tell me. Tell me now,” I growled. My lungs pushed into my ribs, searching for room to breathe.

“It was right before we were supposed to leave for Saints College” She sniffed. “I took a test. Emily was there.”

“Emily? Emily Cornwell?”

She nodded. “That was back when we were inseparable. She knows the whole story. But that’s not really the point.” Sierra breathed heavily. “As soon as I knew it was positive I stuck it in a bag and drove over to your house. But you weren’t there.” She looked up at me, with tear-filled eyes. “Your dad was.”

“My dad?” I didn’t get it.

“He saw the test. He found out I was pregnant.”

“No.” I shook my head. “Not possible.”

“He threatened me. He told me I had to leave and never talk to you again. He didn’t want the baby to ruin your college career or your AFA chances before you even started school.”

“No,” I growled louder this time. “Dad wouldn’t do that. Nothing meant more to him than family. Nothing.”

She nodded against my protest. “Somewhere in his heart I believe he thought he was doing what he had to do to protect you and your mom. At least that’s what I’ve told myself.”

“How? How did he force you to leave? I want to hear it.” I gritted my teeth.

“He threatened to tell you it was someone else’s baby. He threatened to ruin me. I didn’t have a choice. I packed up and left.” She picked up the glass of wine and finished it off. “I didn’t want to leave, but what did I know? I was eighteen and pregnant. He scared me to death. So much that I listened to him.” Her eyes misted and the blue shook my soul. “I never should have done it. I shouldn’t have listened to him.”

“But you did.” The words fell as the defeat sank into my shoulders. What in the hell had my father done?

“Your mom was so sick.” She wiped her tears. “And I didn’t want to make that worse. She needed you. You needed her. I would have pulled you away from her last days. I knew that even back then. I knew I was going to rob you of time with her. Precious time you wouldn’t get back.”

“You didn’t think I was a strong enough man to figure it out on my own?”

“I’ve always thought you were strong. You were the strength I needed every day in my life. It was never that I thought you weren’t strong enough.” She covered her face with her hands. “It was because I wasn’t strong enough.”

“Where’s the baby Sierra? What happened to the baby?” I felt a desperate instinct kick in. Maybe that should have been my first question. Where was my child?

“It wasn’t ever going to be a baby. The pregnancy was ectopic. I miscarried two months after I left.”

“Shit.” My mouth hung open.

“By then I didn’t think I could come back. I had already ruined everything. And I couldn’t tell you I had lost the baby. I just couldn’t.”

“I could have handled it.”

“Really?” she questioned. “Your mom was gone. You were grieving and I didn’t want to ruin the happiness you had in your life. You deserved those. You were already headed to the conference championships. You were rookie of the year. You had a new girlfriend.” Her eyes hardened. “I didn’t have a place in your life anymore.”

“She wasn’t a girlfriend. And it wasn’t a happy time.” I ran my hands through my hair. “This is fucking unbelievable.”

I rose from the floor and paced the edge of the porch. I felt like a caged tiger. There was nowhere to go. And even though I felt restless, I felt like I couldn’t leave her. Not after she had just told me she was going to have my baby all of those years ago.

“I know. I know it is. And I’m sorry, Blake. I should have been stronger back then, but I wasn’t. You were my life. My everything. I didn’t know what to do without you. And I didn’t have the courage to stand up to your dad. Not without you I couldn’t.”

My hand rested on the railing and I looked at her.

“All these years I’ve been angry as hell at you.”

“I know you have.”

“So angry, I wanted every trace of you gone. Every memory. Every song. Every movie. Every joke we laughed about. And you know how I did it?”

She shook her head slowly.

“I fucked every woman I met. I fucked them so you wouldn’t be in here anymore.” I pounded my chest. “I threw everything I had into football. And I became the best. The absolute best.” I clenched my jaw. “So I guess I should thank you for that, Sierra.” The bitterness in my voice was palpable. I didn’t know if I was angrier before she told me or now.

“Blake…”

“Don’t,” I growled. “Don’t you dare give me your fucking pity.” I glared at her. “I got over you. And some story about a baby that doesn’t exist doesn’t bring that all back.”

Her slender frame extended from the chair and she walked toward me. Graceful. Beautiful. Sexy.

“It doesn’t have to bring anything back.”

Her hand touched my arm, singeing my skin with heat.

“But the secrets are gone. The lies are out,” she whispered. “This is who we are now.” Her hand moved up my arm.

“I can’t go back to who I used to be,” I warned her.

“I don’t want you to,” she whispered. “I want to know this version of you. I want to know the man you are.

“Every time we get close again I hold back. I’ve been afraid you would find out the truth. And now that I know about your dad…” Her words drifted off.

“You were that scared of him?” I questioned.

She nodded. “He was your father, and I know you’re in pain dealing with his death, but he terrified me.”

“You never should have felt threatened. Never.”

My hands balled into fists by my side. The need to hold her and protect her against the injustice consumed me. I didn’t care if it was my father or a stranger—she never should have faced that fear alone.

“Blake, can you forgive me? Can you try to understand why I kept the secret?”

“I get it when you were eighteen, but why didn’t you say something sooner? Why did you wait until today? Why now? You could have tracked me down. You could have tried, damn it.”

“It seemed too late. I didn’t want to live in the past. I didn’t want to relive the pain, honestly. Knowing what we could have had.” She bit her lip. “It haunts me every day. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

“I hate what happened. I hate you were scared. I hate you were alone.”

She locked her gaze on me. “But do you hate me?”

“God, no. I don’t hate you.”

And I lost it. I lost the reasons I was angry, or the reasons I wasn’t. I didn’t care about the house, or the fact that she was leaving. I didn’t care she had left. And that if she had to do it all again, she’d probably make the same decision. I didn’t care about any of that shit right now. All I cared about was taking her to bed. Taking her in my arms. And drowning in her.

19

Sierra

Blake’s mouth pressed against mine and his hands tangled through my hair. I sighed when his tongue coiled inside my mouth. His body towered over mine, pinning me with his strength. I melted into his arms as the kiss grew wilder.

We were on fire. Desperate to erase the pain. Determined to discover everything that was new between us.

He picked me up easily and I wrapped my legs around his waist.

The door squeaked as he pried it open and carried me inside. I don’t know why I thought we’d make it up the stairs. Blake didn’t walk past the couch.

He lowered me to the sofa as he started peeling the clothes from my body. His hands were everywhere, tugging and tearing.

I looked into his eyes when I was down to my bra and panties. Panties that were soaking wet.

“Fuck, Sierra.”

I moaned. I could barely breathe.

He dropped to his knees, separating my legs. His thumb pressed into my thigh, running toward my center. He slipped past the fabric and made a rough circle over my clit.

“Ohh,” I whimpered.

“So fucking wet.” He grinned.

I wanted to lie down. Or sit forward. Or stand up. I didn’t know what to do. My body was burning and aching for him in a way I didn’t know was possible.

His thumb continued to explore my wet folds and my hips danced for him. Grinding into the pressure. Creating friction wherever I could find it. And then he pushed inside me with a finger and I hissed with pleasure.

His eyes lit. “You know this is going to get dirty, baby. I’m not the boy you used to sleep with in high school.”

“Oh God,” I whimpered. “I don’t want you to be. What do you want me to do?” I could hear the breathiness of my voice. I sounded sexy and hot.

“Everything I say.”

I nodded enthusiastically.

He unbuttoned his shorts and I watched in amazement as they fell from the defined lines of his hip bones. He was a god. A rock hard god, with the biggest cock I’d ever had. I licked my lips, remembering how much I loved it. How much pleasure it had always brought me. How it had been the first cock I’d ever tasted or had inside me. I had been a high school girl then. Blake was getting ready to know the woman I had become.

I leaned forward, my hands circling his shaft. Gliding over the smoothness of his skin. My eyes lit with desire when I saw vein on his cock throb with want. I traced a line with my index finger, following the path to the tip. I massaged the dewey drop of cum over the top, making him groan. He thrust his hips forward.

“You want me, don’t you?” he asked.

“Yes. Please.” I looked into his eyes expectantly as he pressed his shaft to my parted wet lips.

I groaned feeling the silkiness over my lips.

“Do you know how many times I’ve come just by remembering how it felt to fuck your mouth?” he growled.

My lips parted slightly as my tongue darted out to taste him. My eyes closed in ecstasy. And then he thrust inside me. My mouth filled with the rigid fullness of his hard dick. I sucked and licked while he pumped in and out of my mouth. Each time going deeper until he hit the back of my throat.

I closed my eyes with the memories of this. I loved sucking him. I loved how he tasted. I loved his cock. I always had.

“Fuck, baby. No one gives head like you do.” He pumped harder and I whimpered with the intensity. Blake’s hands pressed into the back of my head, guiding me where he wanted my mouth.

My tongue moved wildly. My mouth begged for more and I could feel the way the rest of my body reacted to him. There was a flutter in my core sending sparks to my clit. My nipples hardened in tight peaks. The sensations were almost too much.

I sucked harder, desperate to give him undeniable pleasure. To taste his release. I whimpered, wanting the satisfaction to flood us both.

But just as I was getting lost in my mission he pulled out and his eyes were devilishly dark and mischievous.

“I almost came,” he breathed.

“Why don’t you?” I offered. I wanted him back. I loved how he felt. I loved how powerful and sexy he made me feel. How he adored my lips.

“Because I’m going to come deep inside you.” He grabbed the back of my hair, bringing my lips to his. The kiss was fierce and primal.

I didn’t think we would ever be able to get enough of each other. There was so much we had to say. So much to feel. Our bodies had a way of talking to each other that couldn’t be spoken through words. The way we fit together. The way we knew how to take each other to the brink of pleasure and then pull back, just in time to make it more intense with another round of cataclysmic arousal. And right now I wanted to express every emotion I could—every way I could through sex. Sex with Blake had always been the degree to which I measured other men—no other man had ever even come close.

They couldn’t read my soul. They couldn’t predict what I needed. They couldn’t make me soar into blissful clouds of skin and heat. They couldn’t make me pant with want, cry for satisfaction, or beg for more. Not the way he could.

I felt his hands slide down my back and unclasp my bra. The straps fell to the side as he pulled the lacy fabric from my nipples.

“I’ve always loved your tits.” He moved from my mouth to my breasts, sucking and kissing my throat and collarbone. He closed his lips around my nipple, biting until I writhed under him.

“Oh, Blake.” I arched, giving him my breast. Offering him my body for his pleasure.

“I want your ass in the air, baby.”

My eyes widened. I couldn’t remember sex with Blake like that before. True I hadn’t been very adventurous at that age, but he had been my first and I had tried anything he wanted. Sex had been something to explore together.

“Are you having second thoughts?” he asked.

I shook my head. “No. I want to make you happy.”

He took my chin between his fingers, brushing his lips over mine. “Will it make you happy?”

I lingered in the kiss. Let the sway of his tongue bring me to the edge of a new kind of passion.

“God, yes.” I nodded.

“Then do it,” he urged. He sat back to allow me room to maneuver on the sofa. He watched me like a hungry lion. It made my skin heat and my pussy ache for release. Had I ever wanted to be ravished before? Had I ever thought I would burn up from the inside out without this man inside me? I had to have him. I had to feel that connection we once shared.

I moved forward on my palms, shifting to my knees, pressing into the sofa so that he had a full view of my ass.

“I like the thong.”

I jerked when I felt him snap the strip between my cheeks.

The sting turned to pleasure. “Do that again,” I whispered. My pulse quickened.

“What? This?” His fingers moved between my legs, pinched the fabric and snapped it over my clit.

“Ohh, yes,” I whimpered. “I like it when you do that.” I wiggled backward, hoping for more.

“Fuck, you’re even sexier now. And I think a little naughty.”

“Only with you,” I admitted. My sex life was vanilla as hell. This was the hottest thing I’d done in years.

“Is that so?” He cracked the thong harder this time and I yelped.

“Yes.” I nodded. I was breathy and I licked my lips, sinking my teeth hard into the soft skin.

He climbed onto the couch behind me. As he leaned forward, I felt his cock press against the inside of my thigh. It was as hard as a rod and bigger than any cock had a right to be. And all I wanted was for him to sink it inside of me. To undo all of the hurt that we had caused each other. I wanted it to push inside me so deep we were connected the way we used to be. I wanted that glorious cock to take me to another time and place. To remind me there was a time when I was his girl. Remind that we had something time and distance couldn’t dissolve.

I looked at him over my shoulder as he fisted it, pumping gently.

He pressed it between the slickness of my folds and I shuttered.

“Shit,” he whispered, coating himself in my juices. His hips kicked back and forth sliding between my slit, building friction over my clit. Every time I gasped with anticipation, hoping he was going to push inside me.

But he took his time, grinding against my ass, slowing his movements. Making me wetter than I’d ever been in my life.

His thumbs hooked the sides of my thong and brought it down to my thighs. I wiggled trying to shake the panties all the way, but I felt a slap against my bottom.

“I want them there,” he growled.

Oh shit. I realized they restrained me slightly. My ass was at his mercy like this and I shivered with what that meant. I was on my knees for him, giving myself to him all over again. Showing him that we wanted the same thing. That our heat and fever ran deep. The hottest embers had always been there under the surface.

I moaned, feeling the straps dig into my thighs as he spread my legs. I loved it. The wickedness of it. The dirtiness. The sexiness of being everything he wanted. Blake positioned himself behind me and I inhaled. I wasn’t prepared. My entrance was dripping wet. My heart firing rapid heartbeats. My clit throbbing. But I wasn’t prepared when Blake slammed inside me like a rod of fire.

I screamed out as he pushed inside, hilting himself on the first thrust. There was no easing into it. There was no building up. He was inside me, filling me with his giant cock and I cried out from the pain.

“Oh Blake. Oh God,” I begged for release, but as he rode me harder it turned to pure ecstasy.

I bounced and sighed as the rocking built inside my core, pushing me to accept the newness of our bodies. The newness of our passion. The tension and anticipation finally unraveling in this moment. The waiting coming to an end. The longing realized. It was all here between us as Blake sank his cock into me, forging erotic places our bodies had never been together.

“Fuck, Sierra. You’re so tight. Your pussy has always been mine hasn’t it?”

I nodded, unable to find the words to describe the feeling. I was a bundle of sensation and wonder. Not knowing my body was capable of all Blake was challenging it to accept.

He reached forward twisting my clit between his fingers.

“Say it,” he commanded.

“It’s yours, baby,” I moaned.

“Tell me it was always mine,” he growled.

I choked back the tears. “It was always yours.” And that was the reality that hit me. It was. I’d never belonged to anyone else after Blake.

He slammed into me over and over as I tried to press back into him. His balls slapped at my wet folds as our groans filled the living room. It was primal and raw. The most exposed and real sex I’d ever had. And I needed it. I needed him. I needed him this way. To strip everything away. To start over. To make me his in an entirely different way.

My belly clenched and tugged as the control I had, began to slip away.

“Oh, Blake,” I growled. “I’m going to come.”

“Not until you beg me for it.”

My heart stopped. My body was on complete fire. Going up in flames, hotter than anything and somehow he made red flames turn blue.

“Please,” I pleaded. I wiggled and bucked, trying to find every inch of his cock inside me. “Please let me come on you. I need it. I need you so badly.”

He grinned. “Damn it, you’re so hot talking dirty, baby.” He yanked my head up by my hair. He plunged inside me and I screamed from the impact. It was a beautiful glorious pain that washed through me in erotic pulses every time he slammed inside me. And yet I wanted more. Needed more.

I was shattering like glass in a mirror. Tiny cracks traveled through my veins. It was over. It was everything. I pulsed and whimpered. The vibrations captured me, shocking me with powerful electricity.

“Oh God. Oh God.” I panted and grasped for a pillow. The edge of the couch. Anything to hang on to.

Blake was relentless. “Fuck it. Fuck.”

He pushed inside me and I heard my panties rip as he pried my legs apart and sank inside me. He shoved my knees wide, angling his cock like a sword, and grunted as his final thrusts sent shocks of intensity to my core.

“You’re mine, Sierra.”

“Oh, yes,” I cried. “Fuck me. I want to feel it all.”

And I craved it like a drug. The need for Blake to envelope me in a haze of heat and sultry, sinful sex. The kind of sex I’d only dreamed about. The kind of sex I needed three showers to wash away. I wanted sex so deep and powerful I’d never forget this moment. I’d never forget the day I let every barrier down and gave this man my soul.

I felt his fingers dig into my hips with urgent tugs. “Look at me.” I twisted my neck to meet his eyes. “Watch me fuck you hard and deep.” His voice was husky and strong. I quivered at the sound. “Watch me fuck your beautiful sexy body.”

I nodded, whimpering. He reared back and slowly sliced into me.

“Ohh.” My eyes rolled back.

“Sierra, watch me fuck you back to me.”

My nipples hardened at his command and I felt another orgasm spring to life in my core. He filled my body with his. He pushed a thumb over my bottom lip and I sucked it greedily while he pumped in and out of me. His cock was like a pleasure stick I could never get enough of. I came harder than I ever had before. Skyrocketing off the couch. Forgetting I was in an old house. Forgetting I was in a home I had abandoned. Forgetting I had hurt this man so deeply I thought he’d never forgive me. He let his thumb linger over my shoulder before sneaking a hand to my breast. With a tweak of my nipple I lost it. I bucked uncontrollably.

My face planted on the couch as he pumped everything he had deep into my walls, filling me with his hot come. It spread through me as his cock pulsed in my swollen walls.

“Ohh,” I sighed. My breasts pressed into the cushions. Every inch of me was covered in sweat. The sweet dampness of epic sex.

“Fuck.”

He kissed my back, moving his lips to my shoulder before sliding his slick cock out of me and lowering me to the couch.

His golden essence seeped from my legs as I laid there in a haze. He crawled forward, taking my lips with his teeth.

I looked into his eyes. “I didn’t know we could do that.”

He waggled his eyebrows. “I didn’t know you could be so dirty, but all your secrets are out now, baby.”

I couldn’t help but giggle. Yeah, they were. Apparently I liked being a very dirty girl with my very dirty ex.

20

Blake

There was some fucked up shit going on. So much I decided the only thing to do was ignore it.

I couldn’t deal with the fact that Sierra had left eight years ago because of my dad. Or because she was going to have my baby. My dad was dead. How was I supposed to confront a ghost? And the baby … well, Sierra said it never got very far. I tried not to think about it. It all hurt. I didn’t want to think about the past anymore.

There were three days until she had to go back to Dallas.

And until then I was going to fucking enjoy myself.

Sierra leaned back into the cushiony seat I had affixed to the bow for her. I steered the boat farther away from the marina. She kept peeking over her shoulder to watch me behind the steering wheel. My eyes focused on the shallow waters in front of us.

The constant summer storms and drastic tidal shifts altered the channel and made boating in the Core Sound dangerous if I didn’t focus.

I slowed the boat and Sierra took in the little cove. Behind her, the moon was rising higher in the sky.

“What do you think?” I asked as I loosened the anchor from the side compartment box. I heaved it out into the water.

“It’s really pretty out here. And peaceful.”

The boat drifted closer to the shore until the anchor tugged at the bottom.

“This is my favorite spot on the whole island. I don’t get to come here as much as I’d like.” I reached into the cooler and pulled out a bottle of wine.

“Wine? I thought you were a beer guy.” Sierra stifled a laugh as I fought with the corkscrew.

“I am a beer guy, but you’re not.” I flashed her a wide grin. “I even brought glasses.” I pointed to the bag on the other side of the cooler.

“How did you have time to put all this together?”

I shrugged. “Nothing but time in the offseason.”

I steadied myself as the wake of an offshore boat passed by. Balancing one glass at a time against my chest, I poured glasses of wine.

“You cold?” I sat next to her on the bow and wrapped one arm around her.

“I’m ok.”

“Something wrong?”

Sierra rubbed her arms up and down. “No, I’m fine. Just chilly from the wind. I guess I should have worn something other than this strapless shirt.”

It was dark on the water, and except for the low light emitting from the boat’s speaker, there were no other lights.

“I like the shirt. Your boobs look hot.” I tugged on it, trying to see down the front.

“Really?” Her voice was suddenly sultry.

“Hell yeah.”

She pinched her lips together. “Too bad I’ll be cold if I take it off.”

“I think I could help with that.”

She laughed. “I’m kidding. I’m playing with you. I wouldn’t—”

“Take it off,” I ordered.

“What?”

“We used to have sex out here all the time. Take it off.” My eyes lit with hunger. I’d never wanted to fuck her like I did now.

Sierra cautiously rose from the bow. Her fingers rested on the top button. She flipped the first one.

“Whoa. Hold on.”

I grabbed Sierra and scooped her up as the boat rocked from a big wake. I brought her down to the floor of the boat before we were hit by successive waves.

“You ok?” I asked. She’d almost wiped out.

“Yeah, I’m fine. You’re pretty quick.”

“Years of practice with my sea legs.” I laughed. “I brought some blankets. Hold on.”

I opened the bow storage and grabbed a few old quilts. By the time I laid them out, Sierra’s eyes held the same lust as mine.

She reached up and pulled me toward her, brushing her lips over mine.

I snaked an arm around her waist and lowered her on her back, flat against the deck. She greedily sought my mouth with her tongue and pulled me closer to her. Her lips were warm and hungry.

My cock hardened as she hitched her legs around my waist, and slid her hands under my shirt.

As my hand reached for her calf and traced a trail on the underside of her leg, a smile spread across Sierra’s face. One inch at a time, my fingertips approached the inner softness of her thigh and started a slow swirling motion, dipping under the hem of her shorts. She let out a groan and shifted her hips, giving my fingers more access.

The more I toyed with her, the more she writhed under me. I fucking loved watching her lose control.

She gave it over to me so easily. So steadily.

I unclasped the button on her shorts. Her hips lifted as I tugged them over the curves of her thighs.

I ran my palm over her center, pressing between her legs, feeling the wetness seep through her panties.

I inhaled sharply. She was everything I remembered. Every fantasy. Every fucking dream.

I peeled her panties off before she could protest, but I saw the hesitation waiting in her eyes.

“Spread your legs for me, baby,” I growled under my breath.

She shook her head. “We’re out in the sound. What if someone sees us?” She tried to look over my shoulder.

“Then they’ll see me enjoying every sweet juicy drop of your pussy.” I eyed her. “Don’t you remember it? How I’d fuck you with my tongue?”

She whimpered.

“How I’d lick you until you shook in my arms? How you begged me to give you more? You remember the first time my tongue slid inside you? Tasted your clit. Sucked your folds so hard you screamed?”

She shook her head. “I do.”

“Imagine what I can do with my tongue now.” I grinned wolfishly. My skills had grown tenfold. She had no idea what I could do to her now.

I watched hungrily as her knees fell to the side and her wet pussy glistened under the moonlight.

“Fuck, you’re gorgeous.”

I lowered myself between her legs, taking a long slow lick from her center to her clit. I groaned, inhaling her scent. Remembering what it was like the first time I’d done this to her. How she purred under me. How I wanted to come all over her. How I was close to feeling that way again.

I bit at that tight nub before plunging my tongue inside her.

She bucked and writhed, but I couldn’t get enough, or give her enough. My tongue twisted and lapped, sucking her juices. Tasting her honey with a thirst I had thought was gone.

I looked up as I was sucking on her clit and saw her hands splayed against her chest. I reached forward, unsnapping the rest of her buttons. She groaned, massaging her breasts.

I was fucking hard as a rock. I tugged the lace down over her tits, jutting them over the bra.

“Ohh,” she cried. Her fingers finding the hard tips and pinching them.

“You’re a fucking siren. You know that?”

I dove between her legs, pumping my tongue in and out when I felt her clench around me. Her hips lifted as she ground into me relentlessly. I felt the tension in her body cling to her just before she whimpered with the orgasm. I watched in horny satisfaction as she came on the floor of my boat.

Her legs spread wide. Her fingers squeezing her hard nipples. Her pussy wet from me.

“Oh, baby.” I looked at her when she eased off the cliff of her orgasm. “So many ways to fuck you, I can’t decide which one.”

“Oh God.” She choked.

I laughed. “I think we’ll figure it out.”

I unbuckled my shorts and kicked them off my legs.

I sat on the blanket. “I want your ass right here.”

She sat up, crawling toward me. Her tits looked swollen and pushed together. They were fucking amazing.

“Straddle me,” I commanded. “I want that tight pussy of yours on my dick.”

She moved one leg and then the other until she was facing me.

I leaned back, crossing my hands behind my head. “Now fuck me.”

“Ohh, Blake.”

She came down on my shaft in a groan of pleasure as her head lashed back.

“Fuck.”

She felt too good. Hot. Tight. Wet. And she was so wild. She rode me with abandon. Her tits bouncing. Her hair flying. Her swollen clit grinding into me each time she landed against me.

And she moved faster and harder.

My hands moved to her hips, clutching at her. I speared my cock inside her as she screamed out.

“That’s it, baby,” I coaxed. “The whole damn island needs to hear how I fuck you.”

“Oh, Blake. I can’t,” she cried.

“Yes you can.”

I lifted her off my shaft and moved her to her stomach.

“What are you doing?”

“Taking this pussy how I want it.”

“Oh God.”

“You like it when I say that don’t you? When I tell you how much I want you?”

“Yes,” she begged. “It’s yours. I want your cock inside me. Please, Blake.”

I lifted her ass in the air, running my hand over the perfect roundness and softness of it. I wanted to bury myself in every part of her. Her mouth. Her ass. Her pussy. But her lips were already swollen and wet for me. I guided her back onto my dick and pushed inside her.

She hissed with release.

“Yes. More.”

I shoved her to the floor, hilting myself inside her. Her hips tilted up and I rocked inside her. My body covered hers. I kissed her ear, her neck. She turned her lips to find mine and I bit at her. Kissed her. Licked and sucked her skin while my cock pulsed inside her.

“It’s too intense,” she whimpered. “Please let me come.”

“Come hard for me.” I bit her ear as she exploded around my cock, squeezing and clamping against it like a damn vise.

“Holy hell, girl,” I groaned, knowing she had me. I couldn’t hold off.

My spine coiled before it moved to my belly and the orgasm ripped through me. I filled her with my come. It erupted from my powerful dick, spreading through her like lava.

Our bodies convulsed and shivered while the orgasms shook us and I knew that not only had I claimed her pussy again, but I had claimed Sierra.

The past was behind us, and whatever in the hell this was—it was ours.

21

Sierra

It happened out of nowhere. Sort of like one of the storms that blew in from the ocean. Blake had blown into my life again—and I liked it. I completely loved it.

It was hard to believe when I showed up on the island to pack up the house that instead I would end up in Blake’s arms again. That somehow we would find our way back to each other. I wondered if it was because we were like magnets who could never truly be pulled apart, or if it was because we were different people now. Older, wiser, bruised, hurt, but our new hearts were drawn to each other in a way that we never would have sustained if I had stayed.

Maybe leaving the island was the only way we would have ended up back in this place. I smiled.

I stretched my arms overhead in the big canopy bed. His huge body was sprawled out next to me. I bit my lip as I eyed his gorgeous skin and muscles. He was just pure sinful. That was the only way to describe him.

And the new ways he had made me come alive under his command were unimaginable. Sure we used to sneak around and have sex when we were teenagers, but this took sex to an entirely different level.

It was so much fun. It was as if our bodies were meant for each other. We just needed a little time away to learn new tricks. I giggled to myself. Because now, we were basically sexual dynamite, blowing each other’s minds with what we could do to the other.

My hand slid under the sheet. I couldn’t stop touching him. Now that we had found each other again, I couldn’t imagine not being with him. Sure, that was fast-forwarding everything. I knew it.

But my body was drawn to him in every way. And whether he was saying it because it turned him on, or because he really meant it—I was his again. My body belonged to Blake Wyatt

My fingertips walked over his hip and slipped to his bugling cock, already hard. I sighed, taking it in my hand. I rubbed the tip with my thumb, bringing it to life. Waking him up one small pump of my hand at a time.

He rolled on his back, not saying a word. Maybe we were past the part where we needed words.

I climbed on top of him, straddling him with a wide stance and began to glide over his cock, rocking my hips back and forth. Each time I felt the wetness pool between us. His fingers dug into my waist, urging me to take him, but I reveled in this. How my body could drive him crazy. How with just the rock of my hips I could have America’s playboy demanding I satisfy him.

His hands tightened their grip with urgency as I rubbed my nipples over his chiseled chest. The points tickled over his skin and he took my breast in his hand, squeezing and stroking it. My head reared back when he leaned forward flicking his tongue over my nipple. But I still resisted what he wanted. I slid over his shaft, grinding with primal desire, rubbing my clit with satisfaction.

His hands snaked around my waist, tugging my ass wide, so that I lost the control. It was in his hands. His fingers massaged between my cheeks, prying and stretching me with certain precision until I panted from the force building inside me. He pressed into my tender skin, playing and kneading, pushing boundaries I hadn’t crossed yet. It felt so good. So warm and soothing. I let his fingers explore until the sensations drove me wild. I sank onto his shaft. My eyes locked on his as I rose forward and then lowered myself on him again. This time, my knees splaying wider. My body clinging to him harder.

The rhythm moved faster as I slid up and down his slick cock. I whimpered when I felt the orgasm start to control me.

Blake grabbed my face, crushing my lips to his. My body wracked with sensation and vibrations as he pushed inside me and I shattered around him. I opened my eyes.

“Good morning.” I smiled.

“Good morning.”

I lowered my head to his chest. His heart beat wildly inside.

His hand moved to my ass, cupping and gripping it gently. I hadn’t moved for him to slide out of me. I didn’t want him to. Blake inside of me was one of my favorite things.

“You can fuck me like that every morning, darlin’.”

“You too,” I whispered.

I didn’t know I could feel content like this again. I hadn’t been content in so long I didn’t know it was even still possible. But it was happening. The love of my life was in my bed.

“Maybe we should move this to the shower?” he suggested.

“Can we just stay like this for a few more minutes?” I asked.

“We can, but don’t you feel that?”

My eyes flashed to his. He flinched inside me.

“You drive me insane. I’m already hard again.”

I sucked in a gulp of air. “Shit.”

“And that little stunt you just pulled was really sweet. But it’s not my favorite thing in the morning.”

“Oh?” I was afraid to ask, but I could feel how hard he was. He was going to show me.

Before I had time to put any of it together Blake lifted me out from under the sheets and he was standing on the floor next to the bed. He rolled me on my stomach, his hand pressing into the small of my back.

His cock nudged between my legs and I felt him fill me with a slow intense thrust as he groaned my name between his teeth.

I clutched at the sheets in front of me, but he was dragging me backward, slamming into his hips. I grasped for gravity, but there was none. Only spiraling ecstasy. Over and over he slammed into me. My body shook with spasms as one orgasm hit me and then another.

Finally. One pump. Then another and Blake thrust into me unloading his release.

“Fuck.” He collapsed against my back.

I tried to breathe under his heavy frame. That was incredible. Possessive. Undeniably hot.

He kissed the side of my neck and I smiled.

“Do you think we really have to leave the house today?” I asked.

He rolled next to me. “Hell no. We can do whatever in the fuck we want to do.”

I laughed. “Then that’s what I want to do.”

“Fuck all day?”

I nodded, crawling toward him. I kissed him. “Yes. All. Day.”

He growled under me. “We have two days left?”

I didn’t want to talk about our time table. I didn’t want to admit that our quick summer romance was getting ready to hit a crossroads. What did we do? How did I even begin to approach the subject?

“Two days,” I echoed.

“You know I’m going back to Florida.”

“I know.” I had to keep the quiver out of my voice.

“Camp starts soon. I have meetings. Press. I won’t be back here for a long time. Once the season starts I’m committed. And I hope it’s a long season. I want to make the playoffs this year.”

I nodded. “I know that. I wasn’t trying to make this more than what it is.”

But was I? What was it? It felt like the other half of my heart. It felt like every time I looked into his eyes I was breathing full breaths. That my soul was with this man. And how could it not be? He was my first. My first love. We had made a baby together once upon a time. He was all I had. And we were here together. Again.

“Darlin’, I’m not saying anything one way or the other.” He closed his eyes. “Fuck. I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t have to. Let’s just enjoy the two days. I get it. You have your AFA life. I’ve never been a part of that.”

He sat forward. His eyes brimming with fire. “Yeah, well I didn’t have all the facts did I?”

I lowered my head. “I can never say I’m sorry enough.”

He tilted my chin up. “I’m not angry at you anymore, baby. It sucks. It’s fucked up. But I can’t talk to my dad about it. I can’t talk to the eighteen-year-old you about it. Right?”

I nodded. “Then what? We have this and then go back to our lives? Run into each other on the island next summer? We aren’t teenagers.”

“Wait. Does that mean you’re coming back next summer?”

I shrugged. “I live in Dallas. This isn’t exactly close. I can’t even sell Aunt Lindy’s china. I’m not having much luck with the estate. I don’t know what I’m going to do. I haven’t decided.”

“I know what we need.”

“What’s that?”

“Food.”

I winced. “I have lots of coffee and wine.”

“Then I’ll run to the grill.” He hopped out of bed. “Ham biscuits sound good?”

I nodded. “I’m starving.”

“Thought so.” He found his shorts on the floor and tugged on a T-shirt. “Don’t move. Stay right there. Naked.” He winked, leaning down to kiss me. “I’ll be back with breakfast and then we’ll decide.”

“Decide?” I looked at him quizzically.

“Yeah. Decide if two days is enough.”

He walked out of the room and my jaw dropped.

22

Blake

What the fuck was I thinking? This girl had me on some damn high I couldn’t come down from. She was the one who broke me. The one who made me the man I was now.

And I was going to go for more?

I pulled into the grill. There was a line of cars. The same fishermen had been coming here for forty years. My dad used to be one of them. I felt my forehead furrow.

He was the one I was angry with. The man who had threatened the girl I loved. The man who had sent my child away from me. The man I had worshipped my entire life. The one I couldn’t stop grieving for in silence.

One of the guys in the parking lot waved at me as he walked to his truck. I couldn’t sit out here all morning.

I walked inside and ordered half the menu. Sierra didn’t even have crackers in that house. I needed food.

On the mile drive back to the house I kept my eyes on the water. I turned onto the gravel drive and raced up the stairs, clutching the white paper sacks of food.

My heart stopped in my chest when I opened the door.

She smiled. Her gorgeous blond hair fell around her shoulders. Her breasts perked and her long slender legs covered the length of the bed. The white sheets twisted around her creamy skin.

I dropped the bags on the floor and dove toward the bed.

She giggled. “That took forever.”

“You didn’t move.”

“You told me not to,” she answered.

“Fuck, Sierra. You’re killing me.”

She brushed the hair off my forehead. “That’s pretty much the opposite of what I want to do today.”

The sheet slipped off her shoulder completely. My eyes landed on her nipple. Sierra caught my expression and nuzzled under me, offering her breast, pressing it toward my lips.

My tongue lashed out over it. I’d never turn down that offer. She had the most amazing breasts I’d ever seen on a woman.

“Mmm,” she mewed.

I sucked her hardened peak in my mouth, flicking my tongue over it rapidly.

“Oh, oh.” She breathed. Her hands pressed into the back of my head.

I lifted my eyes to her. “I’ve decided.”

“What’s that?” she asked lazily. Her hands were on my crotch, trying to free my cock.

“Two days isn’t enough.”

She pushed the shorts off my hips and freed my shaft. Slowly she scooted down the bed until she was just under me. Her lips played with the head of my shaft. I groaned.

“I’m trying to talk to you.” I never fucking talked. Why was she making this so damn hard?

She licked at my dick. “Go ahead. I’ll listen.”

“I want to fuck your lips so bad.”

“Do it,” she taunted.

“Every day,” I answered. I angled my dick at her mouth. She was fucking hot with her lips around me.

Her eyes widened, but I pushed inside her, feeling her tongue swirl over my shaft. I pulled back slightly so she could adjust. My dick was huge. And then I pushed inside again, this time deeper.

“Fuck, Sierra.”

Her lips knew what to do. Her tongue. Her mouth was complete perfection. Sucking and licking while I pumped in and out of her hot wet lips. I hadn’t come like this in a while.

“Every day,” I repeated. “I want this every day.” I hit the back of her throat and she flinched slightly before I slid deeper.

I thought she nodded in agreement.

“To fuck you. To be inside you in every way. That’s what I want. You understand?”

Her eyes lit with desire.

And I lost it. I fucking exploded with more passion than I knew my cock could handle. I pumped so hard inside her, filling her mouth and throat.

“Shit.” I breathed. My body was hit with sudden calm and peace. Part of it was the blow job. Part of it, was I had finally gotten what I wanted—Sierra.

I eased my cock from her lips. She wiped the corners of her mouth and smiled. “I always loved doing that to you.”

“That makes two of us.” I fell back on the bed in a wasted heap. I pointed to the floor. “Breakfast is over there. I’m just going to die right here for a minute. Ok?”

She giggled. “Ok.”

She climbed over me and on to the floor. She looked inside the bags.

“Mmm. I love the ham and chicken biscuits. And you got grits.”

“Yeah. You still like all that, right?” I couldn’t move. I was sated in ways a man shouldn’t be. I couldn’t move a fucking muscle.

I heard the wrapper crackle. “All of it.”

“So are you going to call work today or tomorrow and give your notice?” I asked.

There was silence.

“What?”

I leaned up on my elbows. “The job. You’re coming with me to Florida. You have to tell your boss.”

“Blake, I-I can’t just quit like that.”

“Just now, you agreed.”

“We were in the middle of—well—you know.”

“You can’t even say it. My cock was balls deep in your mouth, Sierra. You said you agreed to it.”

Her eyes widened. “Hey, you don’t have to be an ass about it.”

“I just told you I wanted you. I want you to come home with me. I want more than two days. Isn’t that what we were discussing? Two days isn’t enough. Isn’t that what you needed to hear from me?”

“We haven’t even started discussing it.” She placed the biscuit down. “I love my career. What about my apartment? My friends? The life I’ve had in Dallas for eight years? And I’m supposed to drop that and follow you to Florida?” Her eyes pierced the air. “And you’re ready to give up the life you had? Seriously? No more women. All the trips. The parties. That’s just done?”

“You’re getting caught up in fucking details.”

“Details matter, Blake.” She glared. “Summer romance is one thing. A relationship is something else.”

“We had a relationship.” I gritted my teeth.

“Is it always going to go back to that? Maybe you think you can forgive me, but really you’re always going to be mad about what I did.”

“I’m not.” But I could feel the anger in my veins. I clutched my fists. “An hour ago we were fucking like there were fireworks going off in this room. Now we’re arguing?”

“I guess so.” Her voice was quiet.

“Damn it.”

“What now?”

I exhaled. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe the details are too much.”

“I don’t want them to be. That’s not what I’m saying.”

I had cut myself off from feelings before. I never let it get this far. Why couldn’t I do it again? Just box her out. Shut things down.

23

Sierra

It was possible I might throw up. The happiness and bliss I had felt this morning was as fleeting as the tide.

I stared at Blake, not sure how we had shared so much but were now so far apart.

“I don’t want my last two days of the summer to be like this,” I tried to explain. “I’m happy with you. I’ve loved this week.”

There was something new in his eyes. Determination. Pain. I couldn’t figure it out.

“Then two days it is.”

“That’s it?” I asked. “You’re ok, with seeing how the two days go?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” He shrugged, pushing himself off the bed. He walked to the bathroom.

“Aren’t you going to eat?” I held up one of the white paper bags.

“I think I’ll take a shower. Not that hungry.”

I didn’t want to correct him. He had been starving. So hungry he rushed to the grill.

“Ok.”

He closed the door behind him, and I wondered how in the hell we were going to make it through the next two days without breaking each other’s hearts all over again. It seemed like it might be the thing we were best at.

***

There had been so many things I had neglected since I’d left the island, I didn’t know where to start to repair them all.

Blake had left a few hours ago. He said he was supposed to meet Cole at the barn to talk about opening the boat business again to his family. I knew it wasn’t the right time to start asking questions.

This morning had been amazing and a disaster.

My finger trailed over the address book Aunt Lindy kept next to her phone in the kitchen. There were other ways I could track down Emily, but this one would work.

I dialed the number and waited for her to answer.

“Hello?”

“Emily, it’s Sierra.”

“Sierra?”

“Yeah, hey. I know this is weird calling out of the blue, but I’m at Aunt Lindy’s and I found your number. So I thought I’d call and say hi.”

“Hi.”

I chewed my lip. I was too nervous to get the courage to keep talking.

“Sorry about your aunt,” she offered.

“Thank you. I inherited the estate. I’ve been on the island a couple of weeks trying to clean out the house.”

“Oh, that sounds like a big undertaking.”

I smiled. It was almost as if she were here. “It is. Bigger than I thought.”

“Do you maybe want some help?”

“What?”

“I could drive over for a few hours. I could help you for a little bit. If you want.”

I had to stop from squealing. “I would love that. I’d love to see you.”

“Ok, I’m about thirty minutes away, so give me about an hour and I’ll be there.”

I clutched the phone in my hand. “Thank you.” I hadn’t even bothered to ask where she lived now or what she did. I guessed we could catch up on all those things when she arrived.

An hour later I had my former best friend wrapped in a bear hug. I greeted her on the porch and almost cried from happiness.

“You look amazing.” She glanced at me.

“And I love your hair.” She was always the cute petite one. We were yin and yang. And it worked for us.

“Thanks. I thought short summer cut for the summer. You know?”

I led her inside. “Thanks for offering to help me out. I’m so overwhelmed and I have to leave in two days.”

“Two days?” She seemed surprised.

“You sound like Blake.”

“Blake?” Her mouth fell open.

“Shit,” I whispered. I wasn’t going to talk about him.

“You and Blake?”

I sat at the kitchen table. I nodded. “Sort of. Yes.”

“Ok. So I know we haven’t talked in eight years. But you have to tell me what’s going on.”

I laughed. I realized it didn’t matter how many years had passed. We were Emily and Sierra. Best friends for life.

“We ran into each other and one thing led to another and we’ve been seeing each other.” I left out a majority of the story. My eyes went to hers. “And I told him the truth, Emily. I told him I was pregnant.”

“Oh. Wow. How did he take it?”

“Ehh. I think ok. We haven’t really talked about it much. The baby that is. I think he needed the truth. He deserved the truth. But it hurt him about his dad.” I lowered my eyes. “And now I’ve screwed everything up again by not agreeing to move to Florida with him.”

“What? He wants you to move to Florida?”

“Yeah. Don’t you think that’s a little fast? I mean we just reconnected. And it’s heavy. Right? Our past is heavy.”

She leaned in toward me and I realized how good it felt to unburden myself to someone. Especially someone who knew who I used to be. Someone who knew Blake before he was an iconic playboy.

“First of all … how did you say no? Second of all …he is sexy as hell. How did you say no?”

“Because.”

“Not really an answer. He is basically the hottest guy on the planet. A guy who used to be very much in love with you. And he wants you to move in with him?”

I nodded. “Yes.”

“And it’s too fast, why?”

“I have a career. I have a life in Dallas. I have people.” Although I couldn’t think of any of them at the moment.

“Right. And you’re going to tell me for the past eight years you haven’t thought about Blake Wyatt?”

I shook my head. “Every day.”

“Then go with him.”

“I wish it was that easy.”

“Maybe it is, girl.”

I looked at my friend. From her view it was simple. But from where I was sitting, it was anything but. Life with Blake couldn’t be more complicated.

24

Sierra

A few hours later I looked up from one of the cardboard boxes I had packed full of salt and pepper shakers. Emily was knee deep in casserole dishes.

“I had no idea your aunt had so much stuff.”

“Me either.”

The sun was starting to go down.

“How about a glass of wine?” I offered. “We should take a break.”

Emily smiled. “That sounds good, but what do you think about going to the Dock House?”

“Really? You want to drive over there?”

“Yes. Let’s go. We could never get in when we were in high school. There’s always music.”

“I might have gone earlier in the week with Blake.”

She laughed. “Of course you did. Want to go with your friend?”

I looked at her. “I’d love to. Let’s do it.”

“I’ll drive,” she offered. “I remember what a light weight you used to be.”

“Hey.” I took pretend offense.

As soon as we arrived I scanned the deck full of people crowding in front of the Dock House stage. There were sunburned tourists everywhere.

“I’ve never seen so many people here. This band must be really good,” Emily commented.

There were no drums or other musical equipment on the stage—only a couple amps and a microphone in the center—and crisscross lights were strung over the platform.

A hush seemed to settle over the crowd, but it was disturbed when one of the groupies up front began to squeal. “Here he comes!”

A tall form ambled across the dark stage to the center and turned his back to the concertgoers. I could make out the outline of a guitar strapped on the singer’s back, but nothing more.

He turned around as the stage lights came up and began to strum the opening notes of a familiar song. A deep, ultra-sexy voice belted out the lyrics, and it was a moment before I processed the crooner standing about five feet in front of me. I felt Emily pull on my arm, but all I could focus on were those bedroom eyes and that voice. Blake.

He had now reached the chorus, and the crowd joined in a sing-along, hoisting their drinks in the air. He smiled and sauntered across the stage, winking at his front-row fan club along the way.

“Did you know he could play like this?” Emily yelled over the noise.

I shook my head and followed him as he made his way back to the center, closing in on the song’s finale. I hadn’t imagined this drop-dead gorgeous man could be one bit hotter. Not for the first time this summer, he proved me wrong again. My pulse raced when I saw him search the crowd, glance past the shrieking girls, and lock eyes with me.

“Thank you,” he said over the applause and wolf whistles. “Thank you for coming out tonight.”

The cheers erupted.

He adjusted his guitar and continued. “It’s great to be around so many old friends at the Dock House. I hope you won’t mind if I test out some new material.”

The crowd roared again. I looked around at the happy audience smiling and shouting for more from the man who had rocked my world more than once.

“I’d like to dedicate this one to a special summer friend,” he muttered into the mic.

I stood behind the row of screaming girls, trying to absorb everything that was happening. As soon as Blake’s words launched into the bar, everything else around me faded to black. The only two people in the room were Blake and me.

Baby, they say summer love comes and goes

Comes and goes

Like birds flying south

Tourists leaving town

We’ve been dancing nights so close under the sky

I see it when I look in your eyes

I’m not sure I can let go of this swing we’ve found

Can we chase it and never come down?

But it doesn’t matter what I’m sayin’

I’m goin’ to love you while the sun is hot and the waves are warm

So dance with me, baby, like tomorrow is September

We’ll always have the summer to remember

Baby, they say summer love comes and goes

Comes and goes

Like birds flying south

Tourists leaving town

Before you go, give me one more night on the beach

So I can hold you in my arms and kiss you deep

They say summer love comes and goes

Comes and goes

Like birds fling south

Tourists leaving town

The meaning of the words started to sink into my head as he looked directly into my eyes. For a moment, it felt like he could see deep into my soul, but surely that couldn’t be? Did he mention their swing in the song, and their nights on the beach? It felt personal and intimate. Almost as intimate as giving her body to him.

No guy had ever sung me a song, much less written one that hit me from all sides.

“He’s really good.” Emily interrupted my thoughts. “Can you believe he wrote it?”

I shook my head. “He mentioned he played open mic nights. But this? I had no idea.”

25

Blake

One full set and an encore later, I retired to the bar to enjoy a well-deserved beer. Or five.

“You were great tonight, man.” Cole slapped me on the back. “The girls were loving it.”

“Thanks.” I settled onto a bar stool and swigged the cool liquid.

“I think I have your two newest fans here. They might want autographs.”

“Seriously, Cole? Enough with the fan boy stuff.” I saw Sierra and Emily from high school approach from behind my tall cousin.

“You were amazing, Blake,” Emily exclaimed. She leaned in for a hug. I hadn’t seen her in a long time. I remembered she knew Sierra’s secret and had kept it. I didn’t know whether that made her a loyal friend or someone I should be wary of.

“Thanks. Good to see you.”

For some unexplainable reason, Sierra seemed a tad tongue-tied and nodded her head in my direction.

“Come here, darlin’.” I pulled her between my legs. “You look like you could use a drink.”

“No Long Island Ice Teas though.” She cracked a smile.

“What do you say we have one drink and hit the road?” I asked.

“If we can make it past your adoring fan club,” Sierra quipped. “You’re quite the local celebrity. Or national celebrity. I’m sort of confused right now.”

“Don’t get so testy, darlin’,” I battled back. “I just like to sing some songs every now and then. No big deal. I didn’t even know you were showing up.”

“I didn’t either. Emily suggested it.”

I nodded at her friend.

“Maybe I should head on back,” Emily piped in. “You can take care of this one?” She pointed to Sierra.

“Of course. I’ll take care of her.”

Emily stopped to hug Sierra before she left. I heard them exchange something about trying to keep in touch. I drank my beer and ordered Sierra a drink.

I placed the glass of wine in front of her.

“So are we ok, Blake?” She looked at me.

“Why wouldn’t we be?”

She took a sip. “Because of this morning.” She stared at me.

“Let’s have our drinks. Listen to some music.” I brushed the hair off her shoulder. “And then I’m going to take you home.”

“So we can finish having this talk?”

I laughed. “No, so I can fuck you properly. Now drink up.” I tapped at her wine glass. I was ready to get the hell out of here.

“Well, look at you.” I spun on my barstool and came eye to eye with my cousin Alex.

“Hey, man. How’s it going?” I slapped him on the back. “Ready for tomorrow?” I asked.

“Wait, is this Sierra Emory?” His eyes landed on her.

She blushed. “Hi, Alex. I haven’t seen you in a while. I think you were in middle school last time.”

“Yeah, and tomorrow I’m getting married.”

“Married?”

“That’s right. My little cousin is tying the knot.” I hadn’t thought much about the wedding. I had the invitation plastered to the fridge with a magnet so I wouldn’t forget it.

“Oh, wow. Congratulations. Who is the lucky girl?” Sierra asked.

“You wouldn’t know her. She’s not from the island. But she’s a sweetheart.”

“That’s good to know. I hope it’s a beautiful wedding.”

Alex grinned widely. “You’re taking her aren’t you, Blake?”

I balked in my seat. What the hell? “I didn’t think it was a date kind of thing.” Nothing on the island was fancy. Clam bakes at Shirley’s were as sophisticated as it got around here.

“Oh, no. That’s ok. Thanks, Alex. I’m sure your fiancé wouldn’t want to add a last minute guest like that,” Sierra hurriedly assured.

And with that subtle hint, I felt Sierra slipping back into her shell. Slipping back into that place that made her feel like she didn’t belonged here. That somehow she didn’t deserve this place and the people who lived here.

“Of course I’m taking her,” I spoke up. I grabbed her hand against her knee and grinned. “Sexiest date on the island belongs to me.” I winked.

Alex laughed. “Then I’ll see you there.”

Sierra twisted her full lips together. I could tell I had taken her off guard.

“Yep. You’ll see us there.”

Alex walked away to join the guys in his bachelor party. He was going to be a groom with one hell of a hangover tomorrow.

“Wedding?” Sierra cocked an eyebrow up.

“What? He looked disappointed. And I need a date.”

“And you’re sure you want me to be that date?”

My palms lifted to her face, drawing her to me. “I want you, Sierra Emory. You hear me?”

She nodded as I took her lips. I didn’t care if everyone in this damn bar saw me kiss the hell out of her. She was mine. And it was time I made sure she knew exactly how I felt. Things had been off today. We had fought. We had fallen back together.

And tonight we would love each other until the sun came up.

***

I walked with Sierra up the steps to the back door. She had been quiet on the way home. I knew she wanted to talk. But that was the farthest thing on my mind. I stood next to the swing while she fiddled with the keys.

I brushed her blond tresses from her shoulders so that her hair cascaded down her back.

Sierra’s eyes closed from the contact.

I looped my fingers through her hair, feeling the silkiness. I breathed into her neck. “You know what I’ve always wanted to do out here?”

Her eyes fluttered open. “What’s that?”

If she thought we were going to have some big talk, I had to shut it down. Talking was not on the menu.

“I’ll tell you, but you have to promise me something first.”

My hands slipped to her hips. I pulled on the edges of her short skirt.

She nodded. “What’s the promise.”

“No talking.” A mischievous grin spread across my face.

Sierra laughed. “You don’t want to talk?”

I pushed my finger to her lips and eyed her. “Do you promise or not?”

She tried to arrange her face to make it look serious. “Ok. I promise.”

“Good girl.”

My mouth pressed against hers, willing her to part her lips for me. She wrapped her arms around my neck as the kiss in the summer night turned into something primal. She bit at my bottom lip, and then sighed when I crashed my lips harder against hers.

“I’ve always wanted you on that swing.”

She opened her mouth to tell me no. But I cut her off with one glance.

“And tonight. You are mine on that swing.”

I didn’t know what happened this morning. Why we argued. Why I let feelings get involved. What I did know was that I loved kissing her. Loved how she felt in my hands. Loved sinking into her. I wasn’t going to let this night go to waste. Not when I had two left.

My hands gathered the edges of her tank top and tugged them over her head. She lifted her arms. Her eyes met mine as the shirt slid against her stomach, over her breasts, and along her arms. I dropped it on the porch.

My tongue hungrily sought hers, needing to taste the sweetness of her mouth. The tighter I pulled her against me, the more I wanted her. Maybe it was because she wasn’t staying. Maybe I was desperate to memorize everything about her. If I kissed her enough. If I fucked her enough. Everything would change.

I wanted her now.

With one hand, I unbuttoned my shorts and let them fall to the floorboards. Did she know what she was doing to me? I felt my whole body ache to possess her, to show her exactly what I could do for her. My fingers reached between her legs, sliding the lace on her panties to the side. She whimpered at the contact and bit her lip.

I pushed the skirt up around her hips. The straps on her bra fell to her shoulders as I pulled the lace down to expose her perfect nipples.

I grabbed Sierra around the waist, lifted her, and positioned her until she was fastened around my hips. Without taking my mouth off hers, I carefully stepped back until I felt the edge of the swing hit the back of my legs. Her kisses had become more feverish, and I was doing everything I could to steady the building need I had for her.

“Blake, we’re going to fall.” I felt her grip tighten around my neck.

“Shhh, no talking,” I growled.

I glanced down at the swing. It was plenty wide, almost like a swinging daybed. “I’ve got you,” I said as I steadied myself on the cushion.

I had to be inside her. I had to bury myself in this woman. The need was overwhelming. Consuming.

I gripped her lower back and watched in awe as she arched away from me, thrusting her breasts forward and sliding down on top of my rock hard cock.

The swing floated along the porch. Tomorrow didn’t matter. This morning didn’t matter. This did. I held Sierra as the swing carried us back and forth, slowly slicing through the hot August night.

The edge of her thong rubbed against her clit as she bounced over my dick. I took one nipple in my mouth, sucking fiercely.

She whimpered, but she didn’t say a word.

“Fuck, you’re hot, darlin’,” I groaned.

The swing swayed as I pushed inside her, feeling her clench around me.

I twisted the other nipple before having a taste. My tongue flicked back and forth until I felt Sierra jerk. She was coming swiftly.

“Oh yeah. Like that, baby.”

She came undone. I watched her revel in it. Her body pulsing with the rhythm of the orgasm. Her tits perked as her pussy soaked my cock.

I needed more. I wanted more. She clawed into my neck, riding it out.

“Is your pussy still mine?” I growled.

She nodded. “Always,” she whispered.

I took her lips between mine, kissing her with everything I had. It was never going to be enough. She was the one who had sent me over the cliff and always would.

I lifted her off the swing and walked her over to the railing. I placed her hands on the flat surface and scooted her hips backward.

“This is mine, isn’t it?” I pushed a finger inside her.

“Yes,” she whimpered.

She was soaking wet. Her folds, glistened from her honey. Her clit was swollen from want. I groaned, wanting all of her at once. Needing to bury myself in her mouth. Needing her sweet pussy to hug my dick with all its force.

“It is. And I’m not done with you. I’m never going to be done with you.”

I pushed her back flat, while I positioned her entrance. She gripped the railing. Good girl. She knew exactly what was coming.

My cock nudged between her heat and I groaned.

“Fuck, Sierra. Every time. Every fucking time you do this to me.”

I slammed into her almost taking both of us to our knees.

She cried my name, holding on to the railing for life as I pounded into her harder than I ever had.

My hands imprinted into her ass as I thrust into her. And then my orgasm gripped me. I lost my breath. The world went black. I reared back, slamming into her as I called her name.

“Sierra. Fuck.”

I was buried so far inside her I didn’t know where my body was in space. She had me. She had all of me. I spilled myself in her. Claiming her. Making her mine again. I’d do it as many times as I had to until she knew we belonged together. We fucking belonged together.

We dropped to our knees out of breath.

“Oh my God.” She fell backward. I caught her against my chest.

I kissed her neck. “You’re going to figure it out, darlin’.”

“What’s that?” she whispered.

“One way or the other you’re coming with me.”

26

Sierra

I didn’t know whether to be more nervous or excited that Blake and I were going to this wedding together.

The entire island would be there. And they would see us—together.

I knew what they must have thought about me. The same things that Blake did before he learned the truth. That I had abandoned my roots. Skipped out on my family. Left my aunt when she probably needed my help the most.

I clasped my necklace around my neck, catching my reflection in the mirror. Where was that girl they used to know? Was she still in here somewhere? Did I have it in me to remember what it was like to count on people? To lean on friends and family? I had been on my own for so long I didn’t know if I could let myself fall completely. It was one of the things I was still trying to figure out.

I grabbed my clutch and carefully walked down the stairs to wait for Blake. I wore my hair up tonight. I thought I’d try something different. I hadn’t exactly packed for a wedding, but I wore a light blush dress that had thin straps and fell at the tops of my thighs.

I heard the knock on the screen door and looked up as my date walked into the house.

My jaw dropped. There was over six feet of sex-on-a-stick grinning at me. I didn’t think I’d ever seen him in a suit. It clung to him, showing off his athletic frame. He had to be the most gorgeous man on the planet.

He whistled. “You look amazing.”

“Thank you. I think you look pretty amazing yourself.” I brushed the lapel on his jacket. My palms rested over his heart.

“Ready to do this?” He winked and I felt the fluttery sensation zing through my belly. How did he do that? How could he keep doing it? Make me go weak? Make me feel as if we had met for the first time?

“I’m ready.”

He threaded his fingers through mine and led me out the door.

We parked in an empty lot across the street from the wedding. There were white ribbons dancing in the wind.

Blake stepped from his truck and walked around to help me out. He looked out over the water.

“Fall is coming.”

I thought I saw sadness or maybe it was just realization that reality was headed our way. Fall meant football.

I followed Blake around the side yard to where I could get a glimpse of the party under way on the lawn facing the sound. The event seemed to stretch across three adjacent yards with a white tent at the center as well as a steam pit to the left and a series of round tables to the right. Lanterns were strung from the gnarled island oaks and along three piers that jutted from the three houses.

“This is beautiful.” I stood in amazement. I couldn’t remember the island ever looking so magical before.

“Let’s get some drinks.” He pointed to the bar.

Apparently, things had really changed on the island. There was a full cocktail hour before the ceremony even began.

“Champagne?” he offered.

“One glass should be ok, right?” I took the glass from his strong hands.

“I’ll make sure you get in the right bed tonight, darlin’.” And there it was again. The tingle. The sensation that only Blake could give me. I had it so bad.

We carried our glasses and I followed Blake toward the pier. There was a group of men gathered, smoking cigars. I was skeptical whether I should tag along. I stopped short of the first step on the boardwalk.

“Maybe I should just get our seats,” I suggested.

“Come on. I want to show you off in that dress.” He waggled his eyebrows.

“It’s just.” I felt self-conscious about the whole thing. What were they going to think seeing us together again?

“What is it?” His eyes were dark and smoldering. Holy hell. I’d follow this man off the pier if he asked me to.

I shook my head. “I’m fine. Let’s go say hello.”

I pulled my shoulders backed and inhaled the salty air. My heels clicked against the wood surface and the men stopped talking to look at us as we approached.

“If it isn’t the island quarterback.”

“Hell, it’s the off season.” Blake slapped an older man on the back. I froze. I recognized him. It was his uncle, Roger’s brother. Shit.

The two men had looked a lot alike. Blake was more handsome than his father, but there was a definite good-looking gene in the Wyatt pool.

“Uncle Billy, you remember Sierra Emory from high school don’t you?”

The pit of fear dropped into the center of my stomach. He reminded me so much of Roger. The gray over his ears was more white. And he had more wrinkles around his eyes, but the similarities were eerie.

My hand trembled as I extended it forward. My teeth rattled as I tried to spit out my hello.

“Nice to see you again.”

He took my hand between his calloused palms. “So good to see you, dear.” His smile was warm and generous.

Cole popped up behind us. “Dad, you’re supposed to be seating guests.”

“Oh, am I?”

“Yeah, come on.”

He looked at me then Blake. “Maybe we can catch up after the ceremony.” He squeezed my fingers lightly and walked off the pier.

“Gotta go,” Cole announced. “People around here act like they’ve never been to a wedding before.”

As soon as they were out of sight, I reached for the railing. I took a big breath.

“What the hell is wrong?” Blake asked. “You ok?”

“He … he looks so much like your dad.” I stared off into the horizon. A few late boaters were coming in for the night.

“I guess I don’t see it.” He put an arm around me. “Are you going to be ok?”

I nodded. “It was just a surprise. That’s all. It made me feel like I was eighteen all over again.”

Blake spun me toward him. “Did you hear what I said to you, Sierra?”

My eyes tried to follow his.

“I won’t let anyone hurt you. Ever.”

His strong arms wrapped me toward his chest and I relaxed against his body. He was like a solid wall, daring anyone to pass through him. And in that moment I knew that if someone tried they wouldn’t make it through. Blake had me. He would make sure no one hurt me again.

“Want me to take you home?”

“No. I want to stay for the wedding.”

“Good.” He tipped my lips toward his.

“I guess we should take our seats.”

“Come on.”

He pulled me from the railing and helped me down from the pier. We walked across the grass and waited for Cole to escort me to our seats while Blake followed behind us.

“Glad you came,” his cousin whispered, depositing me in one of the groom’s family seats.

“Thanks. Me too.”

Blake sat next to me. He pulled my hand into his lap.

“Did I tell you how sexy you look?” he asked.

I nodded. “I think you mentioned it.”

He looked over his shoulder. “Do you remember that little beach down there?” he whispered.

I was trying to read through the program. I recognized some of the names from high school.

“Yeah, I think so. Isn’t that where we…” my words trailed off. I wasn’t about to say what we had done there. We were surrounded by wedding guests.

His teeth grazed my ear. “It’s where I—”

“Shh … don’t say it,” I warned him.

He smiled. When he did that I knew I wasn’t going to be able to stop him.

“Why? You don’t want anyone to hear about what a naughty girl you were?”

I eyed him. He couldn’t be serious. “Blake, the ceremony is getting ready to start.”

He squeezed my hand. “Just having a little fun, darlin’.”

Before he could torture me further the music started and the first bridesmaids walked down the aisle. I sighed with relief. I was dangerously close to letting him push me to the edge of the fire. To that circle where the flames danced in my belly and I couldn’t help but the let the combustion take hold.

We stood when Alex’s bride appeared. Blake held my hand through the vows and afterward when the bride and groom kissed. It was sweet, but quick. We moved to the cocktail area to let the staff breakdown the ceremony seats and convert it into the reception site. Everything was all in one place.

Blake handed me another glass of champagne.

“I don’t know if I should.” I eyed him. I wasn’t exactly tipsy, but there was something about the night. Something in the air that was making me buzz with excitement.

“I think you should drink it.” He knocked one back. “I like it when you’re a little more daring. You let down your hair and let me do all the things I dream about doing.”

My core burned at the suggestion.

I touched the glass to my lips and felt the fizzy bubbles slide down my throat. It was sweet. It warmed me to my toes on a surprisingly chilly night.

The band started up. We watched from the sidelines as the bride and groom took to the dance floor and went through the obligatory list of dances with each other and their family.

“Come on.” Blake tugged me by the arm.

I thought he was trying to coax me onto the dance floor, but he was headed in a completely different direction.

“Where are we going?” I stumbled behind him. It was hard to keep up in my high heels.

“You’ll see.”

We moved through the guests until we were on the other side of the tree line.

“You’re not serious?” I looked up at him.

His mouth crashed against mine. “I’m fucking serious.”

I melted in his arms and surrendered every last sensible thought in my head as Blake stripped me in the moonlight on the same beach where I lost my virginity to him.

27

Blake

I pushed the pink straps over her arms and the dress over her hips and thighs.

“It was right here,” I whispered, turning her to face the water. I cupped her breasts, pinching her nipples between my fingers.

She nodded into my chest. “It was.”

My hands coasted over her navel and between her legs.

“This was the first place I fucked you, Sierra.”

She trembled as my hands slipped between the fabric of her silk panties and her skin. I pushed a finger between her slit, rubbing a line from her entrance to her clit. I groaned when her hips jerked forward.

My other hand pried her folds wide as I toyed with that swollen bud. It was hard to the touch as I moved my fingers back and forth.

She mewed softly, her lips parted slightly. Her eyes closed as she leaned into my shoulder.

“You remember that night?”

“Yes,” she whispered. “Everything about it.”

I bit her ear.

My fingers sank deeper inside her. She clutched around me. Her walls caving in around my fingers with unbelievable strength.

“God, you’re sexy.”

“I can’t believe we’re doing this. All those people are just over there.” Her head rolled in the direction of the reception.

“You want me to stop?” I pulled my fingers away, leaving a trail of honey along her thighs.

“No, don’t,” she pleaded.

I chuckled in her ear. I knew she wanted the same things I did. I reached for my belt buckle and shoved the suit pants from my legs. My cock sprung free, large and swollen with want for her.

I twisted her to face me before I lifted her feet from the sand. Her legs clamped around my waist and I grinned adjusting my cock to find her wet hot entrance.

“Oh God, this night has been so perfect,” she moaned as I pushed up inside her.

I braced my back against a tree while she began to rock her hips into me.

“Fuck me, baby. Fuck me like you mean it.”

“I do mean it.” She held onto my neck, pressing kips against my mouth. Her tongue swirled in and out. “I mean all of it. I love this. I love being on this beach with you.”

I grabbed her ass roughly and sliced into her. Her head flew back. “Ohh, Blake. That, I love that.”

“Fuck, baby. So do I.” I did it again until we were both trembling from how fucking good it felt.

She had the most incredible body. The most gorgeous breasts. The most kissable lips. And there wasn’t a part of her sexuality I wasn’t fucking insane about. She could move her body like a dancer. She could take me to my knees. Her swollen clit. Those tits. The way she sighed with pleasure. All of it.

I was going to explode inside her. Fill her with my come. She bounced wildly as I stiffened and my dick shot my release deep.

“Damn.” I breathed into her neck.

She held on to me, clinging to my neck while my dick twitched with a life of its own. My hands wrapped around the small of her back when I felt her convulse and shiver. I watched in awe as she rode out an orgasm. Her pussy clutched my cock. Her breaths were erratic and quick and she mewed the sweetest fucking sound I’d ever heard.

My eyes met hers when she came down from the wave.

“That was fucking hot.”

She kissed me. “It felt hot. You bring out a wild side in me, you know that?”

I laughed, kissing her forehead. “I think you’ve always had that wild side.”

“And you like it?” she asked.

“Don’t you know by now?”

She nodded and I took her mouth with a hungry kiss. God, I would starve without this girl. I needed her like air to breathe.

28

Sierra

The sex was epic. Mind blowing. Cataclysmic. I had just launched off this planet when Blake took me on the beach. He owned me. That man owned my body. Every square inch. Every morsel. Every taste he wanted. It was his.

“We can do that every day when you’re in Orlando.”

“Logistics.” I breathed. “Just let me figure it out. Please,” I begged. I didn’t know if I’d ever catch my breath.

He pulled me into his arms.

“The only logistic you need to know is that you belong with me. You always have. I think there’s a tree on this island somewhere that says so.”

I giggled. “You carved that in an old water oak. It’s probably gone by now.”

“It’s not.” His voice was dark.

“Oh. I just assumed a hurricane wiped it out.”

“It’s this tree, baby. The one we just fucked on. The one that made you come even after the sex was over.”

I lost my breath.

“Are you going to stop fighting me now?” He asked. “Turn in your notice. Pack up your shit and get your ass to Florida where it belongs.”

His eyes flickered under the moonlight. “As much as I love you bossing me around in bed, because I do, it’s not the same in real life.” I saw the anger on his face. “I have a job. I’ve been completely on my own for eight years. You think you’re going to be in charge of my every move?”

“Do you want me to be?”

And that was the question. How far did I want his control to go? When I was seventeen and had given myself to him it was different. I didn’t know what I was doing. I was young and naïve. But I’d made it on my own since then. I went to journalism school and paid for it myself. I never took a cent of his dad’s money.

I sighed. “I’ll give my notice.” I held up my finger. “But I want another job first. I want to move and have something on my own.”

“Fuck, Sierra. You do have something. You have me.”

And we were back to the impasse. To the thing that kept us on separate sides of the same goal.

“I know. But can’t you see I want something too? You have football. I’m not asking you to give up being a quarterback. I’m not asking you to leave the AFA. You don’t have to quit your job. You just have to be patient.”

“I’ve waited eight fucking years for you. Damn it. Don’t do this.”

“I’m only asking for a little time. I have to get my resume together and call some contacts in Orlando. I should be able to have something in six months. My work in Dallas is really strong.”

“Six months?” And that’s when I knew he was over the talking. He was done with all of it.

There wasn’t enough moonlight on the water. There wasn’t enough sparkly champagne or romantic slow songs. He was done.

I looked up. “It’s not that long.”

He buckled his pants.

I wiggled trying to rearrange the skirt of my dress. It was full of sand.

“When you think you’ve found the love of your life again and she tells you to hold off because it’s not convenient, you start to think otherwise.”

He started walking toward the small set of trees that separated us from the reception.

“Blake, don’t go like this. Stay. Please stay.”

He looked over his shoulder. “Good luck, Sierra. I mean it. Good luck this time.”

“No.” I ran barefoot to chase him. “Just stop. Please.”

“I can’t. Not this time.”

He stormed through the brush onto the manicured lawn at the edge of the party. No matter what I said, or did he wasn’t going to turn around.

“Don’t do this, Blake. Don’t say goodbye. Please.”

I watched as his dark silhouette disappeared. I lost him when he joined the crowd.

I stood, trying to cover up my lacy bra, and realized I was more bare than I’d even known.

***

I looked up at the house where I had spent part of the summer. The breeze blowing off the sound skirted through the wind chimes. Three weeks ago, I had thought I was going to hate my trip back to the island. It was only going to drudge up painful memories. And maybe for the first week that was true, but looking out across the sound to where the lighthouse stood, I knew I had grown to love this place and all its quirks all over again.

I had fallen in love a second time. I didn’t know it was possible.

I tossed my purse in the front seat. I knew I was stalling, but everything about this moment was surreal. It felt like I was walking through a fog.

I didn’t want to leave without saying goodbye. I didn’t want to drive over that bridge a second time without saying the words. But Blake wouldn’t answer my calls. He didn’t answer the door when I knocked.

He wasn’t in the boat barn. I couldn’t find him anywhere on the island.

He was the one who had escaped this time.

I slid into the seat and turned the keys in the ignition. She rolled the window down to inhale the last whiffs of the salty air. I didn’t know when I would be back to work on the house. It would sit and wait for me. It wasn’t the first time it had been through a storm.

I exhaled and put my foot on the break. It was time.

I put the car in reverse as I pulled away from the house. Away from a place that had become home. Away from where love had found me.

27

Blake

“Get your asses out here,” I yelled at the team.

The receivers were on the sidelines like they didn’t have routes to run and two of the tight ends were sitting on the bench.

“What the fuck is going on around here?” I looked at Coach. He shrugged.

He was worried about the personnel issues he had with the new coaching staff. We had too many new hires. Not enough seasoned talent.

This was how the first part of the season always started. A complete cluster fuck. But I needed it to go smoother than this. I needed to control it.

The season opener was in two days. Camp was over. The pre-season kicked our asses royally. No one had any faith in the Thrashers. They didn’t think we could pull off a winning season. Looking at this group of lazy ass grown men, I knew why. No one gave a shit. No one had an ounce of passion. An ounce of drive.

But I did.

I shouted at the linemen. “Are you ready?”

They nodded.

“Good. Then let’s go.”

If the guys on the sidelines didn’t want to practice, I was sure some of the rookies did. And if they could catch the ball, I’d request they start on Sundays. All I cared about was getting the W.

I heard the receivers grumble on the field. “Thought he went to some fishing hole. He is not relaxed.”

“What the fuck are you saying over there?”

“Nothing.”

I dropped the ball and ran over to the guy. “If you have a problem with how I’m running practice today, maybe you don’t need to show up. Can’t really tell you’re here anyway.”

The receiver stood. “I said it was nothing.”

The other guys had huddled around us.

“Then shut the fuck up and catch the ball when I throw it.”

I turned, but my anger was still back where I’d left him. I didn’t need some new traded tight end, mouthing off. There was only one person who set the rules around here. And they were making a spectacle of my team. No wonder people were betting against us.

“Wyatt, why don’t we take five?” Coach called. “Everyone’s looking worn out. It’s hot.”

He had finally looked up from his clipboard long enough to realize there was a real problem out here. If we didn’t have things straight on the field who in the hell cared who his third defensive coach was.

“After this play.” Sure I was hot. But we were inside. It wasn’t like we were out in the heat like some teams. It was the entire reason we had indoor training facilities.

I ignored him and walked back to the huddle.

“Let’s try this again,” I announced.

I counted off the snap before stepping back to pass it.

I searched the field for what I wanted to see, but no one was open. Our corner backs were doing a better job than our offense. I cursed under my breath.

“Hell.” I let the ball soar through the air. Someone better catch that shit.

It hit one of the guys in the chest. Not the receiver who was supposed to run the route. Just a lucky bastard who saw where I was headed with the pass.

I threw my helmet to the ground and walked past the coaching staff.

“Wyatt, come on.”

I waved them off and headed for the locker rooms.

It didn’t matter. There was no excuse for it. None. It was bullshit and they knew it.

This wasn’t the summer season anymore. Didn’t they see that? Summer was fucking over. In more ways than I could explain to them.

No more late night cruises. No more fishing with Cole. No boats that needed work. No dancing on the docks. No sex on the porch with a fucking sex siren. No. That was all over. It had been.

Fall was here and the sooner we all accepted that, the sooner we could leave the summer behind us.

28

Sierra

It had been a month since I drove off the island. An entire month had passed. I stared at the city below me in disbelief. Drinking coffee in a high-rise building didn’t feel the same as it had when I watching the boats from the porch at Aunt Lindy’s. I sighed, knowing that below me was chaos. Noise. Frenetic energy.

I didn’t know how the eight years I had spent here suddenly seemed like a foreign memory. Something I almost didn’t recognize. It was supposed to be the other way around.

I heard my phone vibrating from the kitchen counter. I hopped up to answer it. “Sierra Emory.”

“Sierra, get your ass into the station. There were two hit and runs today in the same neighborhood. Dallas PD thinks it might be a serial case,” the anxious assignment editor barked on the other end.

I looked down at my running shorts and the tank top that I was wearing.

“Ray, it’s going to be at least an hour before I can make it in. Besides, why aren’t you sending out one of the beat reporters?”

It didn’t make sense. I didn’t cover stories like this anymore. I had put in my time at the station so I didn’t have to do shitty work like this kind of assignment.

“I’ve got two people who are sick, an anchor out early, and I don’t know if I can find enough videographers today. Do I really have to ask if you’re a team player today?”

“No. No. I can be there in thirty minutes. It’s just today is my day off and—” I looked down at the phone, but the screen was blank. Ray had already hung up on me.

Great. So much for my workout and my call with Emily. I peeled the tank top over my head and turned the shower on. I carefully stepped over the side of the tub and reached for the shampoo.

Ray wasn’t the only one at the station who barked orders. It seemed like threats and insults were the only way people in the newsroom communicated with each other. A little professional competitiveness was important, but I had almost forgotten the cutthroat environment I had returned to.

I dumped a handful of conditioner in my hand and lathered it into my hair. I really needed to talk to Emily this morning.

We were planning a girls’ weekend in October. Emily had suggested we meet in New Orleans for a little Bourbon Street getaway. I didn’t want to tell her yet that the producers were going to cut my vacation time.

I picked up my razor and shook the shaving cream can in my hand before squeezing the foam along my leg. My tan hadn’t completely faded. As I ran the razor along my leg a flash of Blake’s thumb rubbing that spot hit me.

Shit! A trickle of blood streamed down my leg. I didn’t have time for this. I turned the water off and wrapped a towel around my leg, hoping the bleeding would stop.

I tried to tell myself that it was completely normal for Blake to pop in my head from time to time. It was going to happen. The bleeding along my calf stopped. What I knew wasn’t normal was that those flashbacks weren’t just every now and then. They were all the time.

A month hadn’t done anything to dull the vibrant colors in my dreams. His eyes. His hands. His hot-as-hell mouth.

I fastened the last button on my suit jacket and slid my heels into black sling-back pumps. In the elevator ride to the basement parking lot, I let out a steady breath. The flashbacks had to fade eventually. It was taking longer than I thought it would, but I knew if I put my mind to it, the loneliness would subside.

The gut reaction I felt every time I flipped past a football game on TV would fade.

I pulled out my phone to call Emily on my way to the station. It was Tuesday, and Emily said we couldn’t talk until after work, but I wanted to let her know I had been called in for an assignment. I flipped the Bluetooth switch on the steering wheel and waited for my best friend to answer the phone.

“Hey. I thought we were going to talk when I got off work?” Emily sounded distracted, but sweet as ever.

“Can you believe this shit? I have to go into work on my only day off,” I seethed as I pulled onto the interstate.

My high rise was one of the buildings along the downtown perimeter. It usually took at least twenty minutes to make it to the station.

“Oh, that sucks. I can talk for a few minutes. My boss just went to lunch.”

“Oh good. I kind of need to ask you something.” I was more nervous than I thought she should be.

“Of course. What’s going on? You ok?” Emily asked.

They were there, right on the brim of my eyelids—heavy, salty tears. Hearing Emily’s voice broke down the last resistance I had.

“I. Can’t. Talk. About. It.” I steered the car toward the nearest exit. Even in my emotional state, I knew I had to get off the interstate or I would be one of the serial wrecks that Ray told me about.

“Where are you? You sound terrible,” Emily pressed.

I parked at the nearest gas station and dabbed at my eyes with a tissue. My eye makeup was completely ruined. “I just pulled over at a gas station. Oh my God, what’s wrong with me? I’m supposed to be headed in to cover a story.”

“Can you take a few deep breaths?” Emily suggested.

I clutched the steering wheel. “Ok. I can talk again.” I had steadied my breathing.

“Can you tell me about it?”

“No matter what I do, it doesn’t matter what it is. I mean I try, and I don’t talk about it, and I don’t think about it and then—boom—it’s everywhere.”

Emily sounded confused. “Girl, I am not following.”

I exhaled. “Blake. It’s Blake. He’s everywhere. And he’s not supposed to be. I’m in Texas, damn it. I’m as far away from the freakin’ water and his songs, cruises, and sparkly eyes as I can get. He should not be here in my head.”

My chest tightened. “I shouldn’t be feeling this, right? He was a complete ass. He has no patience.” The tears started again. “I mean, do you know how many white trucks there are in Texas? They are everywhere.”

“Oh.” Emily grew quiet. “You haven’t mentioned Blake one time in the past month—not once. I don’t even know how you left things on your last day on the island.”

“Why am I even talking about it now? See? He’s in my head. I’ve lost it. And he should not be in my head. No. I’ve got to get him out.”

“I’m surprised it took you this long to figure it out.” She giggled.

“What?”

“And I think you have this all wrong; he’s not just in your head.”

“This is not funny. I’m miserable,” I whined.

“I’m sorry. Oh, my boss is coming back. I have to go. Can we talk later? I’m going into a meeting, and then we have a press conference. I’ll call you when I’m done.”

“Right. Work. I understand.” I needed to do the same thing.

“So, you, me, and a bottle of wine over the phone after my press conference, ok?”

I smiled. “Absolutely. Thanks. Bye.”

“No problem. Bye.”

I ended the call from my steering wheel, and adjusted my rearview mirror to get a better look at the damage the crying had done to my mascara. Damn it.

I still had ten minutes of road ahead of me before making it to the station. Plenty of time to pull myself together. It felt good to release the breath I had been holding for what seemed like a month.

I slowed the car into the KXMA parking lot and pulled into the closest space to the back door. The satellite trucks were all gone. Must be a busy news day. I reached for my purse as the words of a country song belted out through the radio. Are you kidding me? Of all the country songs on all the country stations, the one I danced to with Blake has to play right now.

I jabbed at the radio button, silencing the song. I’m not dealing with this right now. Pinching my cheeks a few times, and brushing the wrinkles from my suit, I charged into the newsroom.

“Where have you been?” Ray roared over the rows of news desks. “If you don’t get to the scene of the accident now, there’s not going to be any B-roll for you to take and you might as well look like you’re doing any ole traffic story.”

I glared at Ray. “I got here as fast as I could. You called me in on my day off.”

“Whatever.” Ray waved me on. “Get down there before you miss the whole damn thing.”

I didn’t bother to check my email or grab the stack of notes in my inbox. I turned toward the exit doors and ran back out into the Texas heat.

***

I didn’t know what Ray was fussing about. There was plenty of evidence of the last hit and run on the side of the Texas service road. I pulled up behind the police car and put my car in park. I couldn’t see all of the vehicles from my vantage point, so I walked across the road to survey the damage. The tow trucks had just arrived.

“You with the station?” The officer stepped from the accident and tipped his cowboy hat toward me.

“Hi, yes, I’m Sierra Emory from KXMA”

“Officer Blake.” He smiled. “You ok?”

My ankle gave a little in my pumps. “Your name is Blake?” I straightened my stance.

“I can spell it out for you, so your people get it right on the screen. It’s B-L-A-K-E. Bob Blake. You think it’d be an easy name to spell, but they sure do like to get creative with it.”

I reached out to grab hold of the police car. I blamed it on the heat.

“Do you need to sit down or something?” Officer Blake stepped closer.

Embarrassed, I faked a smile. “No. No. I’m ok. Would you mind showing me the damage and the vehicles? I think my photographer is up ahead getting the footage.”

“Sure. Let’s stay on this side of the road so you don’t have to worry about the glass.” Office Blake pointed at the debris. “It started five cars ahead with that trailer.”

I looked around the side of the tow truck. Are you kidding me?

“Seems like whoever the suspect is hit that boat up there first, which lead to this chain reaction.” He whistled.

I looked at the wooden boat sitting on the back of the trailer. My stomach lurched into the back of my throat. All I could think about were the nights out on the sound with Blake. The way he steered us where he wanted to take me. How he showed me the beauty of the island again. That there was value in facing where you came from, even if it hurt.

The truck. The boat. Seeing my summer flash in front of me like this. It was too much. I shouldn’t be here. I couldn’t.

“Hey, where are you going?” the officer called as I ran toward my car.

I didn’t see the people on either side of me, or the cars rolling past.

I didn’t bother to answer the officer. Either the universe or my heart were talking to me. It didn’t matter which, because they both were saying the same thing.

29

Blake

Two weeks later

I stepped off the plane and onto the tarmac in DC. The crisp air filled my nostrils. It was the closest anything had felt like home in a long time. It was fall. This was what seasons meant. Change. Movement. Football.

I didn’t get this in Florida. And for a quick second it reminded me of what I was missing on the island. Oyster roasts and hunting season. Bonfires in the backyard with my cousins drinking beer. Hauling wood inside the boat barn for the season to keep the stove going. All those things I did before I left for good. Before I traded my roots for a life in the AFA.

I was being fucking nostalgic for no reason. I shook my head. What in the hell was I doing?

Jones ran up behind me, slapping my back. “Ready to beat the Sharks?”

“Hell yeah.” I nodded. No one thought we had a chance. The Sharks were having a killer season.

Playing them at home wasn’t going to be easy. We were the warm-weather team invading their outdoor stadium like fish out of water. But I believed we could win. If the rest of the team got their heads out of their asses and played. We would win. We had every reason to believe it could happen.

I climbed onto the bus the team chartered to take us to the hotel. We had a light practice tonight and I had press meetings afterward. I knew what the questions would be. They were always the same. I had standard answers about the season. A way to explain why we were underperforming with exceptional talent. Our public relations director sat down with me before every press conference. He had scheduled the same meeting tonight after practice.

I sat back in the seat while the bus chugged forward with a puff of diesel. My legs were cramped in the small seat. I knew the one question that was coming tonight that I dreaded: where did I fit in that equation? Did I let the team down by not leading them to be something better? Was I responsible?

I heard the guys laughing and talking behind me. They played music and showed each other their social media posts. To them it was a game. They reveled in their celebrity status. The money that rolled in because they were professional athletes. But what they hadn’t figured out was that it was going to be short-lived if they didn’t start winning games. Contracts didn’t mean shit when the numbers were low.

I could let them learn the lesson the hard way, or I could tell them everything was on the line. We were nowhere near being in the lineup for the Super Bowl, but we had to eke out a winning season.

I didn’t hear Coach until he cleared his throat. “You look like a man lost deep in thought.”

“Yeah.”

“That’s supposed to be my job.” He switched seats, landing into the open spot next to me.

We hadn’t talked much this season. When the Thrashers first drafted me, Coach Benson took me under his wing. He included me in meetings. He asked me about the routes. We stayed late in the offices watching film together, ordering pizza and splitting a six-pack. And at some point, he handed over a majority of the offensive decisions to me. Most twenty-two-year-old men wouldn’t have been able to handle it, but he had faith in me. Faith I hadn’t known except from my own father.

“Just thinking about the game tomorrow.”

He nodded, chewing his gum with the side of his mouth. “Different season this year.”

“Yeah. It is.”

“Son, I’ve noticed something different about you.”

“What’s that?” I stared straight ahead.

“Usually you come back from your break a little different.”

“What are you trying to say?”

He slapped his knee. “Hell, I’ll stop sugar coating it and just say it. We all see it. You’re angry, Blake. Mean as a damn snake.”

“Warrior mentality.” I brushed off his comment. “This team is going to hell. They need someone to give them the reality shock to wake them up.”

“That’s not it.” He shook his head. “I’ve known you going on five years now and you’ve never been a son of a bitch like this. Hard working sure. Tough as nails. But not a dick to your teammates.”

My head cocked to the side. “Excuse me?”

“What happened? Is it grief? The fans? What is getting under your skin?”

“I’m good. What you see is determination to dig this team out of a losing season.”

“We’re almost at the hotel. After we check in if you want to grab a drink and talk you know my room is always open. I’m here for you. I’m never too busy for what’s going on in your life. Whatever it is.” He eyed me.

Maybe that was his problem. He was too worried about personal issues to look at the bigger scope of his team. It was falling apart.

“Thanks, Coach. We’re going to win tomorrow. That’s what I’m focused on.”

“Well, on the way to victory, maybe you could ease back a little on these guys. You’ve been riding them pretty hard the past couple of months. Just think about it.”

“Sure thing.”

He stood as the bus came to a stop in front of the hotel.

I hung back while everyone filed off and searched the luggage stack for their bags.

Finally, I joined them on the sidewalk and heaved my travel bag over my shoulder.

“Want to get a jog in?” Jones asked me.

“Nah. I think I’m going to review some Sharks film before practice.”

“Come on. It feels awesome out here. We can run and not even break a sweat in this weather.”

I shook him off. “Maybe later. I think I’m going to change a few of the plays. I’ve got to get that ready before practice.”

He shrugged. “Whatever. I’m running. Don’t let the Shark fans hear this, but I love DC.”

“Yeah, I won’t say anything.”

I headed to my room and locked the hotel door behind me.

The anger was there. It had been there ever since the wedding. Only I couldn’t think about it. I wouldn’t let myself dwell on it. I couldn’t give into it. But Coach had seen it and sensed it. Apparently the whole damn team had. And it was like a dam getting ready to break.

I wanted to unleash the resentment. I needed a place to bury the rage. So far that place had been on the field. I had run the team into the ground. I had barked and yelled. I had cursed in their faces and threatened them. I had come close to knocking a few to the ground.

And why? Because I let Sierra back in? Because for a few weeks out of the summer I stopped being the man I was and let myself be the man I used to be. An island guy with nothing but time on his hands. A guy who loved with his heart and soul. And it blew up in my face.

The instant I let my guard down she did what she had always done. She destroyed me. She ripped through my soul. It wasn’t one thing. It was lash after lash of layers of lies. The baby. My father’s role in our breakup. The inevitable way things were going to end a second time.

I stood at the window. I saw Jones take off on his run.

Coach was right even if I couldn’t say it at the time. Things had to change. I couldn’t carry this anger around. It was killing me and wrecking the team.

I wasn’t a man who lived with regrets. I had forgotten that.

The leaves across the street drifted to the ground. They held deep colors of auburn and scarlet. It was time to let go. Move on. Push forward. The summer was in my past.

30

Sierra

I sat on my couch, crunching ice chips and digging into a bag of chocolate chip cookies. The game was on. I had avoided watching the Thrashers until tonight. They were in DC to play the Sharks. All the commentators said there wasn’t much of a chance they would win. The season had been dismal for the Orlando team.

I was afraid if I saw Blake on that field, I’d melt. Or cry. Maybe both. I didn’t scroll online for his name anymore. I didn’t watch Sports Now. I did everything in my power to avoid the topic of football for over a month. That wasn’t an easy feat living in Texas. I had actually been proud of myself.

Until now.

I had no idea his season had gone so wrong. There was a pit of guilt in my stomach for not finding out until now. He couldn’t be happy about that. He was a champion. He only lost a handful of games when we were in high school. And I remember how hard he took those. It was as if the light in his eyes went out when the scoreboard showed the final score. He didn’t like to lose. He never had.

I held my breath when he jogged toward the line of scrimmage. My heart seized as soon as I saw him. He was tall. Domineering. Powerful in front of all those men. He held himself with a kind of confidence that was undeniably sexy.

I leaned forward involuntarily as if that somehow put me at the game instead of half a country away from him.

The whistle blew and then everything was a blur. I couldn’t take my eyes off him. I didn’t hear what the announcers said. All my senses were focused on one thing—Blake.

Somehow four hours passed like that. With my eyes glued to the screen and my heart desperate to cling to any glimpse of him I could. When he took his helmet off on the sideline, I sighed. Sighed loudly enough to shake me out of my stupor.

What was I doing? Drooling after him like some kind of Thrashers groupie?

When I saw him I didn’t feel like a groupie. He wasn’t some unattainable man on the cover of a magazine or in a movie. Blake was my reality. He was always going to be the first boy I’d ever loved. I looked down at the empty bag of cookies. I had stress eaten the entire bag. I would have moved on to a second if I had one.

Blake was no longer that boy I crushed on from high school. I needed to realize he was now the man I loved. And that love had grown over the summer in a way I didn’t know was possible. He had moved into a new place of my heart. A place that had been filled with years of precious memories.

Once again I was responsible for where we were. If I had only said yes to him, I’d be the one greeting him on the field. I’d be the one in his arms. I’d be the one sharing his bed tonight.

I buried my face in my hands as the sobs wracked my body. What had I done? I’d never felt more alone in my life than I did at this moment.

I was homesick for the island. I missed Aunt Lindy and the comforts of the house I grew up in. I missed the smell of salt hitting my nose in the mornings. I missed the cruises to the Dock House and the music Blake liked to play.

It all felt so overwhelming. How did I leave that behind for a second time?

One of the sideline reporters rushed toward Blake and shoved a microphone in his face. The camera caught the steam from his sweaty forehead and the frost in the air when he spoke.

“Blake, congratulations on your win,” she shouted.

“Thanks, Mindy. Pretty happy about the team right now.” He grinned. I felt my core seize. God, I missed that smile.

“What did it take to bring your guys back from a first half deficit? You were down by two touchdowns coming back in the third quarter. What did you say to them in the locker room?”

Blake rubbed the back of his neck. I sighed just at the sound of his voice. “I looked around and saw a lot of long faces. But I believe in this team and that’s what I told them. We just needed to believe in each other and get the hard work done on the field.”

Mindy touched the side of Blake’s arm and I felt a ripple of jealous surface. “The Sharks brought their defense tonight. How are you feeling? You took a few big hits out there.”

He nodded. “Nothing a little rest won’t work out. Thanks so much, Mindy.”

He stepped around her before she could draw him back in for another question. I watched him disappear into another throng of reporters and my heart sank. I wanted another glimpse of him. I wanted to hear his voice again.

I reached for my phone. I wanted to call him and tell him I saw his big win. I wanted him to know I watched every second of it and I was rooting for him. Did that matter to him? Would it count? Did he even care?

I hesitated. I held the phone in my palm before I lowered it to the coffee table. I had ruined our chance. It didn’t matter that I would walk out of the station tomorrow and never look back if only he would ask me again.

Again wasn’t ever going to happen. I curled on the couch and cried myself to sleep.

31

Blake

I stared into the pint of beer on the bar. Jones slapped me on the back.

“We fucking won, man. We actually won in DC.”

I nodded, chugging in the process. “We did.”

“You should have gone on that run with me. I think it did something. There’s something in the air here.”

I laughed. Jones was drunk. He sounded poetic.

“It was a hell of a game.” One of the lineman plopped down next to me.

“Thanks for covering my ass.” I tipped my stein toward him.

It looked like most of the team had poured in here after the game. The bar was across the street from the hotel. There were bound to be Sharks fans in the area. DC was crawling with them. The fans were loyal and diehard. They weren’t a new franchise like the Thrashers. I bet some had watched the game from this very barstool, but they had most likely gone home to lick their wounds by now.

“Anytime.” He grinned a big goofy smile. “Feels like it was different team tonight.”

“Yeah it was.” A lot had registered with me tonight. The way we had come together in the second half. The victory meant more than just a W to these guys. It felt like a turning point.

I felt a soft hand glide over my shoulder and rest on my bicep.

“Hi.”

Fuck.

I looked toward her. She had full lips and a set of tits no man could ignore. She was wearing a Thrashers jersey she had altered to show off her best assets.

“Hey, there sweetheart.”

Jones and the lineman chuckled to each other. “I think I see Haynes over there. Be back.” Jones hit the other guy on the back to take a hint. They moved from my left, opening up a couple of bar stools.

She slid in next to me. Shit. Her skirt barely covered the tops of her thighs. I could smell her perfume as she leaned in closer.

“Is it ok if I sit here?” she purred.

“Why wouldn’t it be?” I’d played this game a million times. It always ended the same way, with the girl under me, while I fucked the lights out for both of us.

She dropped her eyes, crossing her legs. I followed the path her leg made over top of the other one. My cock throbbed for a quick second. And I realized it had been way too long since I’d gotten laid. Since the night on the beach with Sierra. That was the last time I had held a woman in my hands. The last time I had felt the rush of sex. The thrill of skin against skin.

And why was that? What was I waiting for? Why had I been holding out like some virgin rookie afraid fucking would ruin my season? Was that my excuse? No sex this season?

I turned toward her. “What’s your name, darlin’?”

“Jessica.” She smiled.

“Blake.” I winked.

She blushed shamelessly. We both knew what was getting ready to happen. Women like her didn’t drop into the seat next to me for a romantic night on the town. I’d never be a wine and roses man. My reputation wasn’t decorated with romantic gestures and sweet overtures. Women knew what they were getting into. Jessica knew exactly what she wanted.

“Congratulations on your big win,” she commented. “It was a great game.”

“Thanks. We needed it.”

And what I needed was to stop cock blocking myself. In the past month every time I got to this point I made an excuse for why I had to get home or back to my hotel room. Sometimes I led the girl outside just so the guys didn’t see me back out at the last minute. They didn’t know I hadn’t fucked anyone this season. It wasn’t any of their damn business.

Did I think something was going to change? That somehow Sierra was going to be someone she wasn’t? That if I held off on other women for a little longer that it meant something? Because it fucking didn’t. It didn’t mean anything to her. And I wasn’t eighteen any longer. I had let her punch me in the heart back then—I was too old for that kind of game now. Jessica was my kind of game.

The kind where the only thing that mattered was sex and football. No emotions. No feelings. No way to get hurt.

I looked at the brunette. “Want to get out of here?”

She nodded enthusiastically. “I was worried you weren’t going to ask.”

That had been her intention from the moment she touched me. I scooped my hand around her waist and headed toward the door. Tonight I was going to put the summer behind me. I would finally get Sierra out of my system.

I had managed to turn things around on the field. This was my last obstacle to getting complete control.

I shoved the door open and Jessica walked ahead of me. Her ass was round and tight. I groaned to myself, knowing what I should want to do to it. How six months ago, I would have kissed her and stroked her in the parking lot until she begged for more.

“My hotel is this way.” I pointed, staying a step or two behind her so I could take in her legs. I followed her thighs, watching them slice back and forth. Nothing.

She fumbled with her purse and I heard something drop to the pavement. “Shit,” she whispered. She bent over, the jersey hung loosely from her chest, and I caught a full glimpse of her heaving tits. Fuck. My cock should be hard as steel by now.

I shook my head.

“Something wrong?” she asked.

“Darlin’, I think I’m just going to make sure you get home. I’ll hail a cab for you.”

“What? Why? Did I do something?” Her face fell with disappointment.

I stood on the sidewalk, waving down any yellow taxi I could. One pulled up to the cubr and I opened the passenger door for her.

“You didn’t do anything wrong. Nothing at all. Not a damn thing.”

And that was the truth. This woman dripped of sex. And it didn’t do anything for me. I didn’t want her.

“But maybe breakfast?” she pleaded.

I shook my head. “Not this trip. Have a good night.”

“But—”

I closed the door and tapped the top of the cab to send her back into traffic. I watched the taillights fade as the taxi rounded the corner.

Maybe tonight I had been ready to let go of the anger, but I crossed the street knowing I wasn’t ready to let go of everything else. Not yet.

32

Sierra

I managed to make it through another week before I knew exactly what I had to face.

At our round table production meeting I had rushed out of the conference room, feigning a stomach virus. I had ended up in the women’s room throwing up into the first trash can I could find.

There was also my sudden aversion to poultry. Just the thought of a turkey sandwich or a drumstick made me gag. It was the weirdest thing. It came out of nowhere. And I was late. I never kept track of my period, but I was beyond late. It all added up to one explanation. One impossible, hard-to-believe, unreal explanation.

I walked into the drugstore. At the end of the family planning aisle was a shelf with box after box of kits and tests. There were so many options with purple and pink labels they made my head spin. I grabbed the first three I spotted and rushed to the counter. I didn’t read the percentages or the response rates.

The clerk took his time ringing me up and even asked if I wanted to join the rewards club.

“No,” I shuffled impatiently on my feet. I had finally gotten up the courage to walk in here and I had to pee something fiercely. “I’m good.”

He handed the plastic bag to me and I hurried to the car. I was only a few blocks from home.

At some point I knew the ice cravings and sudden hot flashes weren’t because I was in Texas. We weren’t going through a heat wave. October wasn’t that cruel.

And then there was the constant peeing and my boobs were killing me. They were prickly and almost hot to the touch. Something was going on with my body. It might have been eight years ago, but there was a sensation that came over me that I distinctly remembered. My tongue felt dry and I couldn’t believe how dizzy I was. I had to face the possibility that the impossible had happened.

I knew my IUD wasn’t one hundred percent effective, but given my past history, I used it as an emergency backup. Pregnancy wasn’t something I thought I’d face again without serious medical intervention. And my doctor seemed to dole out IUDs to all her patients in their twenties. She said it was the most popular birth control, so I went with it.

I took the elevator to my floor, clutching the bag between my sweaty palms.

I dropped my keys at the door and was hit with a wave of vertigo went I bent to pick them up.

“Oh God.” I clutched the wall for support, trying to stand up without falling over.

As soon as I opened the door I sprinted to the bathroom, tore open the first box in the bag without reading the instructions, and held it under me.

I swore after the last time I’d never take another pregnancy test like that again. The next time I was going to be married. It was all going to be planned. Down to the birth month. And my husband and I would sit on the edge of the bed waiting for the results. We’d make jokes and be nervous. Giggling together and worried together. Maybe even daring the other one to look at it first.

But hell no, that wasn’t how this was playing out. I was alone. Completely alone. I looked at my phone for the hundredth time, waiting for the minutes to tick by.

What was I going to do when I read the results? How was I going to tell Blake? Or what if it was negative? Maybe I wasn’t pregnant and instead I had some horrible incurable illness. Maybe I was alone and sick. My fingers began to shake. I had to know what was happening. I needed the truth.

I picked up the stick on the counter and sank to my knees.

I knew the answer before the flashing words told me what my body had been screaming for weeks.

I was pregnant.

33

Blake

The wind whipped hard across the sound. It cut to the bone it was so damn cold. I couldn’t stay long, but a few days here was what I needed. A place to figure out why this season had been harder than any other. Why no matter what I did, I couldn’t keep the team together.

While the rest of the team was in Cabo for the weekend mending bruised egos, I was back on the island, looking for the answers I only found in this place.

A place I could be quiet. A place I could think away from the noise and the speculation. Orlando had given up on us. The fans were disgusted. The commentators saw the writing on the wall. The Thrashers were wasting talent every Sunday.

I still had to make it through the rest of the season knowing everyone had given up.

I tossed a log on the fire I had made in the pit behind the house. I took a sip of beer and cushioned my guitar in my lap.

The strings stung my fingers as I strummed the first chord. Every part of me felt the chill through the wire. But it was what I needed. I wanted to linger in the numbness as I drank myself drunk. As I watched the flames turn to embers. As I sang words I didn’t have the guts to admit to anyone else except an empty backyard.

The fire crackled as I put the song together, one broken thought after another. I reached for the last beer in the case. How in the hell was I all out of beer? Maybe if the Thrashers released me I had a backup career. I kicked the coals with the heel of my boot. Fuck. That wasn’t even funny.

I didn’t have anything if I didn’t have football. I shook my head. It was worse than that—I didn’t have anything if I didn’t have her.

And that’s what I had to face here. That’s why I truly came back in the middle of the season. I never showed my face here in the fall.

I had to let go of Sierra once and for all, or I was going to re-break over and over. There wasn’t anything I could do until I said goodbye. She was like a ghost on this island. I saw glimpses of her when I drove over the bridge. Every corner took me back to the first time and the last.

I knew there was a bottle of bourbon in the house somewhere. I staggered inside, fumbling for the lights and grabbed the bottle from the back of the kitchen cabinet.

I twisted off the top, feeling the thirst pool in my mouth for the relief of the whiskey. My salvation might be in the bottom of that bottle. I tipped it back and strolled to the fire.

I picked up the guitar and let the words tumble.

I had to remember before I could forget. I knew she had forgotten. Tonight I’d drink the whiskey. I’d let the fire burn and I’d remember enough for the both of us.

34

Sierra

It was hard to believe this morning I was sitting on the floor in my tiny apartment crying my eyes out and now I was here.

My hands trembled as I parked the car in front of the boathouse. This had to be the single most insane thing I had ever done. I looked through the window of the workshop building and saw a figure walk past the glass. An instant swirl of butterflies descended on my stomach, followed by nausea.

Of all the nights for Emily to work late, this would be the one. I needed her. Needed her more than any other time. It was nine o’clock, and my phone hadn’t rung once. I had left her three desperate voicemails.

I had rushed straight to the airport with the pregnancy test in my purse. Luckily, flights between Raleigh and Dallas were frequent—I was on the next flight to Raleigh three hours later, and touching down in my home state at five o’clock.

It had all happened so fast; I didn’t have a great plan. All I knew was I had to get to Blake. I thought that was going to be tracking him down in Orlando, but with a quick online search I read that he had gone home while the rest of the team was in Mexico.

I watched the shadowy figure pass by the window again. Well, I didn’t just spend a fortune and fly across halfway across the country to sit in my car. I pushed open the car door and walked toward the boathouse office.

I bit down on my bottom lip. I knew Blake wouldn’t be excited to see me. He had made that clear months ago. It wasn’t like I hadn’t tried to call. Every time his phone rang it went straight to voicemail. I didn’t have a choice. I had to do this. I had to live in truth this time. It was the right thing to do—the only thing I could do. I knocked on the door.

“Hold on.” I heard the friendly voice through the other side.

“Sierra?” Cole stepped back with a puzzled look on his face. “What are you doing here?”

“Can I come in?” I smiled, feeling my knees go weak. I’d come so far, but now that I was here I was losing my nerve. And I couldn’t count on body not to roll with nausea at any second.

The plane ride had been uncomfortable and embarrassing enough.

“Yeah, come on in.” Cole pulled the door to the side, allowing me to step inside. “So, I’m just going to guess you’re here to see Blake.”

I twirled on the heels of my boots. “Good guess. Is he here?” I wasn’t sure if I should hope he would appear from the office.

When I played this scenario out in my head, it didn’t include Cole.

“Yes and No. How did you know he was on the island and not Orlando?”

I shrugged, embarrassed to tell him I had stalked his cousin’s social media accounts. Everywhere Blake went there were pictures. I knew he had landed in Raleigh yesterday. That only meant one thing—he was here. He had a bye week. The team was off for almost two weeks.

“A good guess?” I faked dumb.

“Well, he’s not here. He’s up at the Dock House. It’s Tuesday. You remember Tuesday nights around here, don’t you?” He had taken a seat on a nearby stool.

“Of course I do. I just didn’t know where I’d find him, so I thought I’d try here first.” The disappointment that Blake wasn’t here washed over me. Or was it relief?

“Don’t look so sad, girl. He’ll be back.”

I took a step toward the door. I hadn’t flown hours and then driven three more to sit around and wait for Blake to show up. I had to get this over with.

“Thanks, I’m going to go see him.”

“I guess some things don’t change.” Cole exhaled.

“What does that mean?”

“You always going after what you want—same ol’ Sierra.” Cole smiled.

“Some things do change,” I replied softly. I had to fight the instinct to rest my hand on my belly.

Cole’s playful banter face transformed to shock.

“What’s going on? Why are you here?”

“To see Blake,” I answered.

“Uh-huh. And you just showed up here on a Tuesday night?”

“We need to talk. Ok? We left a lot of things unresolved at the end of the summer.”

“That’s what you call it?”

I felt the tingles of panic work through my body. “Why? Did he say something to you? Do you know something, Cole?”

He backed up. “I’m not getting in the middle of this again. I played my part when you left the first time. I watched the destruction of my cousin implode in front of my eyes.”

“Wow. I didn’t know you thought that about me.”

He hung his head. “I don’t, Sierra. But you two need to get your shit straight. You belong together, not apart. And the sooner you both figure it out, the sooner you can stop hurting each other.”

“That’s why I’m here,” I admitted.

“Good.” He shoved his hands in his pockets.

“Could you do something for me? A small favor?” I asked.

“Depends.”

“Could you give me time to get there? Please don’t tell him I’m here. I need to talk to him. It’s important.” I was suddenly more afraid than ever that if he knew I was on the way he might be the one to run this time.

“I can do that.” He grinned.

I looked at the clock on the wall. “I need to go if I’m going to catch him.”

“Aw, you’ll be fine. He’ll be there ’til closin’ time.” Cole winced as soon as the words were out of his mouth.

My smile changed quickly. “What are you saying? He planned to stay out all night?”

I tried to keep the jealousy and suspicions out of my voice, but it was hard to forget the fan girl groupies who were always waiting for Blake after his shows. Any one of them would be more than happy to go home with him, if he gave them the chance. A sour pit formed in my stomach.

“You’ve been gone almost two months, girl. I think you need to get down there and see for yourself.” Cole walked to the office and turned off the lights.

I fumbled with the doorknob and walked out, the briskness of October wrapping around my shoulders. Cole was right behind me. I looked at the rental car and thought of the twenty-minute drive to the Dock House. I wasn’t sure I could make it there; my emotions were all over the place.

Cole patted me on the shoulder before walking to his Jeep. “Enjoy the show. It was good seeing you.” He climbed in and peeled onto the road before I could pepper him with more questions about Blake. I wasn’t prepared for what I was going to say to him. How did I tell him he was about to become a father?

Damn it. I better get this over with.. I sent the car into drive and made my way to Oakton, to Blake.

35

Sierra

Tuesday nights in October were a far cry from the crowded summer nights I was used to. I pulled into an empty parking space close to the Dock House sidewalk. Blake’s truck wasn’t here, but Cole had told me this was where he was for the night.

This was the last place I should be. The absolute last place. I’d woken up this morning in hot and dusty Dallas, and now I was standing outside of the Dock House while boats rocked in their slips.

My heel made a hollow sound as it hit the parking lot pavement. I slammed the car door behind me and inhaled, taking in this place and all the memories we had made.

The wind whipped through my hair. I hesitated. This was all wrong. I shouldn’t be here. But I had to know. I had to see him again.

I pushed open the door, my heart in my throat, my palms dewy with perspiration, my breath fevered.

Was any of it real, or had it all just been a flash of summer heat?

I didn’t know whether to run into the bar screaming his name or sneak in like a spy. Right now, nothing made any sense.

I took a deep breath and walked through the door, opting for the less dramatic entrance choice. The lights were low and candles dotted the tables. From behind the bar, I saw the bartender leaning on her elbows, eyes fixed on the stage. I scanned the room, skipping over the locals who were listening to the performance. There he was, sitting on the stage, holding his guitar. I walked in as the song he was playing ended.

The handful of drinkers started clapping. I’d never seen the place so empty.

“One more before I take a break, y’all.” Blake spoke into the mic. “This is something new I just wrote. So just indulge me for a minute. I’m bearing a little of my soul tonight.”

My throat tightened. I stepped one foot in front of the other and slid into an open seat at the back of the bar. I thought maybe the shadows would protect me. He couldn’t see me in the dark corner.

“Whoooo, baby. You sing whatever you want!” one of the fan girls shouted from a nearby bar stool.

I shot her a death stare.

Blake’s laugh filled the bar. “Calm down, Cece. I’ll play your song in the next set.”

I thought he winked at the girl. Maybe this was a mistake. A huge mistake. What was I thinking coming here? That he would be different? That he would change? That he had held a flame for me as deep and heated as the one I held for him.

No matter how I tried, this man was etched in my soul. He was everything to me. I knew that before I found out about the baby. I’d known it since our first kiss. I knew it at our last kiss. My ribs pinched together at the thought that there was someone else in the picture. He had moved on so quickly. And I had mourned him. I had cried for us.

One note launched into the air, followed by another, then Blake started to sing.

Summer winds in your hair

Feeling more than the salty air

I should have known when you smiled

That you were taking my heart

When you left this sleepy town

So why did you have to kiss me like that?

Girl, why did you have to kiss me like that?

With our feet in the sand

And your body in my hands

There was no way to keep from

Falling under your spell

So why did you have to kiss me like that?

Girl, why did you have to kiss me like that?

Summer rolled out like a wave

You’re gone, but I still see you in this place

So why did you have to kiss me like that?

Girl, why did you have to kiss me like that?

The small crowd erupted in applause. Blake looped the guitar strap over his head and placed the instrument next to his stool.

I had no words. My heart pounded in my chest. He had written everything I had been feeling for the past month. All of the things I tried to escape and ignore in Dallas, he had managed to capture in a song—an amazing, beautiful, heartbreaking song.

The butterflies in my stomach were now a full flock of seagulls. If I didn’t talk to him, I was going to explode.

I stood, ready to intercept his path to the bar. As he made his way off the stage, he shook a man’s hand and then, in an instant, Cece was next to him, handing him a beer. He squeezed her shoulder before taking a few swallows.

I stopped in mid-stride. Cece was planted under his arm, smiling and looking right at him. Her dark, pixie haircut was perfectly styled—too perfectly, I thought as I exhaled. This whole thing was a disaster. Complete disaster. Why hadn’t Cole been a little more forthcoming with the details of Blake’s Dock House nights? Maybe he wanted me to find Blake with another girl. Maybe he thought this was what I deserved.

The exit to the Dock House was about twenty paces behind me. Maybe I could turn and walk out before Blake saw me standing there like a total idiot. This didn’t have to get any worse than it already was. I reached down for my purse and slung the leather bag over my shoulder. Blake looked content with his arm draped around Cece. He hadn’t noticed I was there. He wouldn’t even notice I was gone.

I’d tell him another time. Another way. But not like this in the face of utter humiliation. I couldn’t watch him move on with another girl.

I walked toward the door with every intention of going straight to the car. But I couldn’t help it. As much as I wanted to walk right out the door, I needed one last look. One reminder that he had moved on and I was the one holding on to a summer crush. One more snapshot of Blake to remember. This moment needed to be preserved.

Because I would need it later when I held our baby. I would need to remember why I had to do this on my own. I couldn’t raise a baby with a man who didn’t want me. A man who didn’t love me as wildly as I loved him. What kind of life would I offer our child that way? This baby wasn’t bigger than a grain of rice and I already felt the strongest connection and maternal instinct for its happiness. It was my responsibility to give our baby everything in this world. And that might not include two parents who were in a relationship together, but it could include a mother who loved tirelessly.

I couldn’t put it all together in this second. Blake would have a role. He could be involved, but like hell if I was going to confess every love sick emotion I had felt. My heart broke and shattered with the realization that I had missed my chance with him again.

As I pivoted on my heels and looked across the bar, he saw me. Shit! Panicked and flustered, I slid through the narrow entrance and ran to the car. Oh my God, where were my keys? I fumbled through my oversized bag in front of the driver side door and dropped the keys on the pavement.

“Shit.” I crouched down, searching under the car for the keys.

“Sierra?” Blake walked over to where I was a shaking, nervous wreck. He dropped to the parking lot and scooped up the keys from behind the front wheel.

“Hey.” I let a nervous reply eek from my lips as I tried to stand.

Blake hopped to his feet. “What are you doing here?”

“I-I…” None of the prepared speeches I had rehearsed on the plane or in the car seemed to fit this moment. Seeing him with Cece had changed all of that.

I’m having your baby seemed like a ridiculous thing to say right now.

“I don’t even know what to say.” He stepped closer, causing my senses to buzz from the nearness.

“I should get going. Just popped by to say hi.” I reached for the keys that were in his fist.

Blake scanned my eyes. “What? That’s it? I haven’t seen you in almost two months and you’re just out of here?”

I froze. What in the hell did I do now?

36

Blake

I had no idea what was going on with this girl. I thought I had seen a damn mirage when I looked over at the bar door and locked eyes with her. Nothing was going to stop me from running after that blonde, just in case it was Sierra. I knew I had it bad.

There wasn’t enough whiskey or beer last night to drink her out of my head, and I had sure as hell tried.

I thought I saw Sierra everywhere I went. The girl I spun around in the grocery store yesterday almost clocked me. Even my cousin, Cece, had started teasing me about it. The music helped; singing about Sierra helped. When those notes were in the air and I could sing about her, my heart didn’t hurt quite as much for that one song. Taking a hit on the field, or scoring a touchdown took the edge off. But, now here she was, already running out of town, and she hadn’t been here five minutes.

“I shouldn’t have come. Big, big mistake.” She fiddled with the door handle, suddenly very clumsy. “I don’t know what I was thinking. I’ll call you later.”

I reached around her and took the keys from her hand. “Call me later?”

I wasn’t letting her out of here until we had it out. I was still a little drunk. Drunk enough I wasn’t going to hold anything back.

Her eyes fell to the pavement. She pinched her lips together.

“Say something before you leave. Have a beer with me at least?” I realized I might be begging a little, but this was crazy.

“I think you’ve got that covered. Cece’s keeping a barstool warm for you, isn’t she?”

“What?”

“I saw you two. You don’t have to say anything else. We’ll talk another time. Just let me go, Blake.”

I laughed. Once it started, I couldn’t stop. I wiped the tears that started squeezing from the corners of my eyes.

“I’m glad my humiliation is so funny to you.” Sierra stood, looking disgusted as I tried to control the jolts of laughter.

“You-you’re mad, because you think I’m with Cece.”

“Aren’t you?” She sputtered the question.

“No, she’s my cousin. She’s here every week with her friends.” I stopped laughing long enough to brush a lock of her hair away from her face. “She heard I was here for tonight so she didn’t want to miss it. Don’t know when I’ll be back.”

Sierra’s eyes softened. “So, you’re not with someone else?”

My hand moved along her neck and snaked its way through her hair. “No, didn’t you hear that song I wrote about you? I am not with anyone else.” I was still trying to wrap my head around her being here.

“Just how many freakin’ cousins do you have?” I could see the blaze in her eyes.

I looked toward the sky to count. “You want a first cousin number or what?”

She shoved my chest. “That’s not funny. Oh my God, I thought you were with someone, and I flew here and I didn’t stop driving until I found you. I couldn’t stop and now…”

My wide eyes conveyed all the surprise I was feeling. “You were that serious to get here?”

She bit her lower lip. “Yeah.”

“Why? Why now?”

She shivered. “Do you think we could go inside, but maybe not here?” She rubbed the sides of her arms. “I don’t think I can face Cece after the death stare I shot her.”

I laughed. “I doubt she thought anything of it. Cece’s a tough girl.”

“We need to talk, Blake.”

Talking could wait. There was only thing I wanted right now, and the more I played with her hair, the harder it was to deny.

I didn’t need a second invitation. I pulled her into my arms and pressed my mouth against her. Sierra wrapped her hands around my neck and moaned. Had I let her walk away? I was a fucking idiot. She started to giggle as I picked her up, and her legs wrapped around my hips.

“I missed you.” I growled into her neck. “More than I can say in words or in a song. There’s only one way to show you, darlin’.”

Sierra leaned into my body. “So can we get out of the freezing cold and can finish this somewhere else?”

“Hell yeah, I wanna go.” I placed Sierra’s feet back on the ground and took her hand. “Come on.”

Sierra looked at her car and then back to me. “You want to take my car? I don’t see your truck anywhere.”

“Girl, you have been gone way too long. You know the best way to travel around here is by boat.” I flashed her a smile. “We’ll get your car later. Come on.” I tugged on her hand.

Sierra followed me down the boardwalk to the slip where I had tied up my boat.

“Let me untie the ropes, and I’ll shove her off. Hold on.” I held out a hand to Sierra. Before she boarded, she glanced down at the side of the nameless boat we had cruised on so many times over the summer.

Sierra settled into the bench next to my captain’s seat. I tossed the ropes into the boat and started the engine.

The boat picked up speed, and the fall night encircled us as I cruised us out onto the open sound.

As soon as we docked, I helped her into my truck. I couldn’t get her inside fast enough.

“Cole told me you were at the Dock House. I don’t know if he’s still at your place.”

“Got it.” I steered my truck toward the end of Gull Island. Toward Lindy’s house. It was Sierra’s now.

Sierra climbed the stairs and opened the back door. I didn’t let her get far over the threshold before I snaked my arms around her and dragged her lips to mine. It was dark and cold inside, but I had enough pent up sexual frustration and heat for this woman to burn down the whole fucking house.

My hands landed on the button of her jeans. “I want you now,” I growled.

“Wait. Wait a second.” She took a big breath, pressing her palms into my chest.

I groaned. “We can talk later.”

She shook her head. “No. I have to tell you, Blake. Please. I-I have to say it.”

I dropped my hands. “Ok. What is it?”

“I need to at least see your face.” She tried to flip on the lights, but nothing happened. She looked at the ceiling. “Great.”

“Let me check the breaker box. Hold on.”

I used my phone to light a path to the linen closest off the back of the kitchen. It smelled like fresh laundry even though the house had been closed up for months. I opened the box, but all the switches were on. I tried the main breaker. Nothing.

I heard Sierra’s footsteps behind me. “What’s wrong with the power?”

“I think it’s been cut off.”

“What?”

“Have you been paying the power bills?” I asked.

She scrunched her face up. “I thought I did. I don’t know. There has been so much mail about the estate. Shit.” She sank onto a bench under a stack of blankets.

I was conflicted. Why was she here? She hadn’t bothered to pay the damn power bill.

“I think there are some candles in here.” She stood and started searching one of the cabinets. “They used to be in here with the matches for hurricanes. Aunt Lindy had everything we ever needed for a storm.” She strained to make it to the top cabinet.

“Let me get that.” I reached over her head and pulled out a stack of candles. I handed them to her. “And the matches.”

We dropped them in a row of mason jars and lit them with the wooden matches. Within seconds the room was glowing and felt warmer than it had when we first wandered in here.

“Sierra, tell me what’s going on. I about lost my damn mind when I saw you. And you reminded me that that’s what you do to me. You make me forget everything. I rushed you on the boat and back here like nothing happened.”

I shook my head. I saw the sadness in her eyes.

“And something did happen, damn it. You fucking broke my heart again. And you need to hear it. You have to hear what you did.”

The tears slipped off her lashes. “Blake…please…”

“Let me finish.” I held up my hand. “I’m not going through with it again. I won’t. So tell me now why you’re here and—”

“Shut up, Blake. Just shut up.” Her cheeks were wet with tears. “I flew here tonight because I wanted to see you. I had to see you. Today. It had to be today.”

I leaned against a stack of quilts. “Ok.”

“And I think I could throw up I’m so nervous.” She twisted her hands together.

I cocked my head. “What’s going on?”

“I-I … Blake, I swear I didn’t know when I left in August. And I want to talk about that. How we left things.”

“I fucked up. You fucked up. I can agree to that. But we can’t go through that again. We can’t.”

She shook her head. “I know. I feel it too. I’ve felt all of it. It’s about this pattern we have of hurting each other. I want it to stop. I need it to.”

I threaded my hands through her hair and pulled her toward me. “It will stop. I’m done. Come home with me. Be with me. Say it, Sierra. Say you’ll fucking end this pain. Tell me that it’s over.”

She took my hands from behind her head and lowered them over her breasts, down to her stomach. She planted her palms over mine.

Her eyes lifted to mine. and she was so damn beautiful I almost lost my breath.

“Blake, I’m having your baby.”

I heard it, but I didn’t know what she was saying. “What?”

“I’m pregnant. I took a test this morning. It’s yours. Your baby. Right here.” She held my hands to her belly.

“You are pregnant?”

She nodded. “I am.”

“Sierra.”

She had knocked the wind out of me as quickly as a linebacker.

“You’re completely sure?” I asked like a fucking idiot.

“I started not feeling well and I could barely keep my eyes open. And I’m late. Extremely late, but I didn’t think it was possible. I brought the test with me.”

“I believe you. Of course I believe you.” I started to regain my senses.

“I didn’t know what you would say? How you would react. I don’t know if I should tell you I’m sorry. I just don’t know what to do.” Her voice cracked.

“Say you’re sorry? What are you talking about?”

“I told you I was on birth control. I don’t know how it happened. I didn’t even think I could get pregnant to be honest.”

“Why not?” I wasn’t following.

“I was sure after I lost the other baby that it couldn’t happen. That there was something wrong with me.” Her eyes lifted to mine. “But I am pregnant. And I had to tell you as soon as I found out. I couldn’t wait for you to answer the phone or find out some other way. I didn’t want you to think that I’d keep it from you again—ever.”

“No wonder your boobs look so incredible.” I cracked a smile as she hit me in the arm. “Sorry. But they do look fucking amazing, baby. Edible, really.” I tugged at her shirt, wanting to see more.

“I just told you I’m pregnant and you want to look at my breasts?”

“No, I want to do more than that to them.”

“But the talking … there’s a lot to talk about don’t you think?”

I crushed my lips into hers, sinking my tongue into her mouth with possession. Damn, this woman was mine. She always had been. And now my baby was inside her. I growled.

“You just told me I’m going to be a dad.” I broke away. “I don’t have words that can do that justice right now. Understand?”

She nodded. “You’re not mad?”

“God no. I’m happy. I’m happy you’re back. I’m happy about the baby. I’m happy about what I’m getting ready to do.”

“And what’s that?” She tried to wiggle out of my hold.

“Make you happy, darlin’. Everything that makes you happy.”

She let her shirt fall over her shoulders. “I love you, Blake. I love you so much.”

Her lips found mine the shadows of the linen closet and I kissed her like it was the beginning.

37

Sierra

The world spun upside down and for the first time it wasn’t because I was pregnant, it was because Blake kissed me with the kind of fury and passion I’d longed for since the day he left me on the beach.

I had dreamed about this moment. Now that it was finally happening, I couldn’t catch my breath. I held on to him. His tongue slipped between my lips, twisting and curling against mine.

I shivered when he tugged the corners of my shirt. The air danced over my skin.

“It’s cold,” I murmured.

“I’d make a fire out in the living room, but I don’t think we have that kind of time,” Blake growled into my neck.

I shook my head. “No, we don’t.”

He scooped me up. “Lots of covers in here.”

I nodded. “Lots. So, so many blankets.”

He pulled a few of the quilts from the shelves, padding the floor. He lowered me on my back.

“I promise you won’t be cold long.”

I grinned, greedily sucking at his lips. I had dreamed about his lips and the firmness of his arms. I never thought I’d be with him again like this ever. I thought those dreams were all I had left.

Blake lifted the shirt over my head and slid my bra from my shoulders.

“Holy shit, baby. Do you know what these do to me?”

He held one of my breast in his hand. It was heavy and sore, but he soothed the ache with the heat from his tongue. I whimpered as it lashed over my nipple, hardening it instantly.

“So fucking perfect, baby.” He sucked me into his mouth, gulping and licking. Pressing until his teeth nipped the edge of the sensitive points.

I inhaled sharply. My body responded differently now. Everything was heightened.

“Oh, Blake.”

He pushed me back on the soft bed he had made. I had already forgotten how cold I had been as he slipped the jeans from my waist.

I laid before him. The woman who loved him. The woman who had always loved him. The woman who was carrying his baby.

He pushed my legs apart, running a finger over the fabric of my cotton panties.

“I love how wet you get when I touch you,” he groaned.

I bucked a little, aching for his touch. Aching for the friction of his fingers against my clit. It was throbbing and pulsing for attention.

He slipped one finger under the edge, toying with my slit. I hissed with want.

He brought his finger to his lips and sucked the honey. “You’ve always tasted sweet to me. It makes me crave you.”

“Oh God, Blake.” I almost cried as he lowered his head between my legs, moving the panties with his teeth.

He pushed my knees wide, as his tongue dipped between the slickness of my folds and ran back and forth, tracing the edges of my clit before finally thrusting inside my entrance. I groaned, trying to hold him inside me. He began to twist and flick his tongue until I was a writhing sex nymph.

“Ohh,” I cried. “I’m coming so fast.”

I seized the quilts in my hand, balling up my fists, but the orgasm hit me at once. My body shook and shivered as it spilled through me. Blake lifted my hips, sucking my clit hard, pushing his tongue inside me, riding out the orgasm with me and lapping up every drop of it.

Slowly he lowered me, grinning one of those devilish sexy smiles I loved so much.

I heard the zipper on his jeans.

“I have to be inside you.”

I nodded. It was all I wanted. To feel his thick cock push inside me. To belong together like we did when our bodies slid against each other.

He pulled the shirt over his head, tossing it behind us.

I reached forward, stroking his glorious cock. He rubbed it between my slit, coating it in my juices. Time seemed to slow. The frenetic pace had been replaced with something deeper and tangible.

“You’re not worried are you?” he asked.

I smiled. “No. It feels so good. I know everything’s ok.”

“God, you’re a fucking goddess.”

He nudged his cock against my entrance and I moaned.

“I love your pussy. And I’ve missed it, babe. I missed you.”

He pushed inside me as we both bucked with sensation. He thrust deep and far until my hips lifted to greet him, sucking him inside me.

“Ohh,” I whimpered. Nothing had felt this intense. Pregnancy sex was something completely different.

His lips fell to mine and I bit and kissed him while he rode in and out, pumping with steady strokes.

He hit my inner walls, rocking me to my core. I clenched and groped, wanting the orgasm to shatter me. Needing it to bring us back together.

My eyes locked on his and we both knew it was coming. Blake’s fingers wound through mine as his breathing turned to ragged pants.

“You’re mine, always.”

I nodded. “Always.”

And with a final thrust he moaned as he pumped his release inside me. He smiled slowly, his body rigid with pleasure and satisfaction.

I pressed my lips to his.

He pushed again and the world collapsed in on me. I screamed out, the orgasm pinching and firing shockwaves through my nerves.

“Oh God, Blake. Oh shit.” My eyes closed as I tried to hold on, but he only picked up the pace, pushing deeper, spreading my legs farther apart.

“Feel how good it is between us,” he growled. “Feel what we do together.”

I bit my lip. My head thrashed to the side. Another orgasm built in my core and before I could handle the last one, the new one unleashed in my body.

“Fuck, baby,” Blake groaned, his eyes rolling back.

I was squeezing his cock with everything I had. We rocked and thrust. Our bodies dripped with sweat. Our lips found each other, until finally the rhythm slowed and Blake settled next to me.

He exhaled. “What in the hell was that?”

I giggled. “I think that was pregnancy sex.”

“Whatever it was, I liked it.” He kissed my shoulder.

We stared at the ceiling. The candles flickered from the mason jars.

“You know I’m not freezing anymore.”

“Didn’t think you’d stay cold long.”

He shifted to his side. His eyes drifted to my navel as he began to draw circles on my belly.

“This is incredible.”

“You’re happy?” I was hesitant to ask. Having a baby wasn’t an automatic pass for happiness. There was so much to discuss.

“Of course I’m happy. We made a baby.” He flattened his palm. “When do you think it was? On the boat? The swing?”

I laughed. “I think it was the first time. The couch.”

“The couch. Really?” He raised his eyebrows.

I nodded. “It was the first time I’d ever had sex like that. I just have this feeling.”

“Magic position.” He winked.

“It was magic, wasn’t it?”

“Damn straight.” He tickled the tops of my thighs and I wriggled under the pressure.

“Blake?”

“Hmm?”

“Before the baby, before today, my answer was yes.”

He sat forward. “Yes?”

I nodded. “I missed you. Nothing mattered anymore. What I have in Dallas doesn’t matter. I want you to know that. I figured it out before this morning. But the baby—it changes things.”

He brushed the hair from my face. The tendrils were damp. “It does.” He lowered his mouth to mine, inhaling with a fierce kiss.

“I was never going to get over you, Sierra.”

I smiled. “Now you don’t have to.”

***

“What do you want to do with the house?” Blake asked as we locked up the door. We had kept in warm in the linen closet as long as we could. We had to head for somewhere with heat.

I dropped the keys in my purse. “I’d like to keep it. What do you think?”

He nodded. “Yeah, let’s do it.”

“What do you mean?”

We walked down the wooden stairs. There were so many repairs the house needed. There were leaks under sinks. A few of the gutters had broken away from the house. And now I knew without power I was setting up the scenario for possible frozen pipes.

“I mean, let’s make this our island house. I’ll sell the business to Cole.”

I stopped in my tracks. “What?”

“Cole wants to build boats. There’s a pier here. We can build anything else we need. It’s where you grew up. You were happy here. I can see us here.”

I was amazed. Blown away. “You’re serious?”

He pulled me toward him. “Completely. Let’s do it. We’ll fix it up and it will be ready for us next summer.”

“You realize next summer there will be three of us.”

“Yeah, I do. You think I should buy some of those baby life jackets?”

“I don’t know how much boating we’re going to do.”

Blake held my hand, leading me down the stairs and toward the truck. I had one of the quilts wrapped around my shoulders. It was going to be a chilly ride over to his house.

“And before that?”

He opened the door for me.

“Are you asking about Orlando?” I looked at him.

“I am.”

“I’m there if you’re there. I’m here if you’re here.” I leaned into him. “I swear this girl is never leaving you again.”

He grinned. “I knew you’d leave this island with me.”

He was cocky, but I loved it because he was right.

EPILOGUE

I looked out over the water. The sun had almost set on another cold December day on the island. There were a few boats skimming the waves, making their way in for the night. I put the truck in reverse, cranked up the heat inside the cab, and made a U-turn out of Shell Point.

There were a few lights glowing on Shirley Lane. The clay pots spilled over with purple and gold pansies. I sighed as I passed the house. It was where everything had started. Again. I knew as long as I lived, I wouldn’t pass that house without thinking about Sierra and that summer. I shook my head and reached for the radio.

I slowed the truck before easing it onto a grassy lane. The grass was mostly brown now except for a few stubborn weeds, which refused to accept summer was long gone. I parked next to the marina office, but left the engine running. It was too cold to start the heating process all over again, and I knew Jojo would have the oysters ready for me.

“Well, look who’s here.” Jojo beamed from behind the counter.

“Hey, darlin’.” I strolled to the counter. “Did Willis get my order together?”

“Sugar, you know it.” Jojo walked out from behind the register and turned to the line of coolers near the door. “How many bushels you need?”

“I think one is plenty.” I withdrew cash from my wallet and placed it on the counter. I grabbed the canvas sack from her grasp. “Tell Willis I said thank you. I heard these were his best this year.”

“He’ll appreciate that, Blake.” She smiled. “Take care, honey.”

I heaved the fifty-pound sack into the bed of the truck and jumped into the cab, ready for the blast of heat. It didn’t matter to me what the temperature reading was on the dash; the cold had settled into all the nooks and crannies of the island. I continued south a few hundred yards. My thumb lightly drummed the top of the steering wheel. I couldn’t help but sing along with The Embers—somehow it made the summer not feel so far away.

I pulled the truck to the sound side of the house. From the windshield, I could see the low glow of a fire on the beach. Good. Cole’s at least got that going.

The oysters had slid to the tailgate. I reached over the side and retrieved the bushel Willis had sacked for me. By now, the sun had settled in the west, and the night sky was cast with a harvest moon that lit up the entire sound.

“Cuz, what kept you so long?” Cole stood on the beach, poking the orange embers with a long fire stick. He had assembled a long sheet of metal over four stacks of cinderblocks that acted as sawhorses. “This fire has been ready for thirty minutes.” The coals burned two feet under the platform.

I held up the canvas bag. “Don’t you worry your pretty little head. I’ve got the oysters.” I dropped the sack near Cole’s feet and scanned the empty beach. I took a deep breath of the chilled air.

“I have the champagne!” Emily giggled as she bounded over the grassy yard toward the beach. She held up a green bottle and pointed toward Sierra. “And sparkling cider.”

“I’m holding the good stuff. We are not smacking Moet into the sea.” Sierra smiled at me before my arms wrapped around her, and I buried my head in her shoulder.

“Darlin’, you need to keep me warm tonight.” The words made her purr in my ear.

My hand dropped to her belly where I could feel the small bump under her sweater. I rubbed over the fabric.

“Hey, you two. We have serious oyster roasting and boat christening to do tonight.” Emily wagged her finger at us.

Sierra tilted her head to the side. “We aren’t stopping you.”

“All right. So what’s the game plan? It’s damn cold out here.”

“This bottle is for drinking and celebrating.” Sierra held up the expensive French champagne. “And that one is for the boat.” She pointed to Emily’s bottle.

“Looks like you two covered all the bases.” I reached for the high-end bottle and unwrapped the foil sealing the cork. I looked at Cole. “And what about the oysters?”

“Ten minutes, tops,” Cole announced as he dumped half of the sack onto the metal sheet. A low hissing noise rose from the table when Cole covered the first round with a heavy canvas.

“Let’s make a toast.” Emily withdrew glasses from the bag she had brought to the beach, and held them up for me to pour.

“Thanks.” I tilted the bottle and filled each glass with the chilled beverage. I grabbed the cider for Sierra and handed her a special glass.

“I think you should do it, since you’re the songwriter.” Sierra poked me in the side.

“I’m a QB,” I groaned. “A football player,” I added.

“One who is not in the playoffs,” Cole called out.

Fuck. I didn’t need him needling me about what happened with the Thrashers.

“Songwriter doesn’t equal toast master, but I’ll give it a shot, baby.” I watched as the sharp flames from the fire caught the rise of the champagne’s dancing bubbles.

I cleared my throat. “Here it goes.”

I looked at Sierra and felt my heart swell a little. This was a moment I never saw coming, even if it was one I’d always wanted.

“Cole, man, when you asked me to go in with you on this venture, I could have sat down and listed the pros and cons, run the numbers, and consulted every boat builder Down East, but I didn’t. You asked, and I said yes.” I shuffled my feet in the sand. “I said yes, because you asked.”

Sierra and Emily smiled at each other across the circle.

I continued. “And I’m sure as hell glad I did because I wouldn’t be here tonight. None of us would be celebrating your tenth boat and your five-year exclusive contract with Charleston yacht club if it hadn’t been for you. So, tonight, I know we’re christening her”—I nodded at the vessel anchored along the beach—“but this night is about you bringing all of us together. Without these boats, this business, and you as my family, I wouldn’t have my favorite thing on this island.” I winked at Sierra. “So, here’s to boats, summer, and never giving up.”

“Here, here!” we all said in unison before drinking a few sips.

“Blake, that was beautiful.” Emily hugged me hard.

“I meant it.” I squeezed her again. “Let’s get this party going.” I pulled out my phone and hit play on my beach music playlist.

Cole walked over and slapped me on the back. “I couldn’t have done this without you. You know that?”

I cracked a smile. “I know. You would have been crazy to try it without me.”

It hadn’t been easy opening the doors to the boat barn again. Once I had though, I knew I couldn’t close the place up. Cole deserved to live out his dream, just like I was. So when he had asked if I wanted to re-invest in the family business, I couldn’t turn him down. He needed start-up cash and I promised I’d play the role of silent partner. In the summers I’d be here to work on the boats.

I hadn’t figured out how my dad fit into it. Once I found out he had kept Sierra’s pregnancy a secret from me and that he had been the reason she left, I hadn’t been able to think about him the same way. Part of me wanted to burn the barn down and all his work inside.

Handing it over to Cole helped. I let it go. I focused on what really mattered—Sierra and the baby. The renovations were underway at Lindy’s place. It was ours now. I don’t Sierra knew how happy it made me when she said she wanted to keep the house. I’d pay any expense she wanted to restore it to its original state.

And the nursery was going to be massive. The baby would wake up every day of the summer and see the water. Nothing made either of us happier. I might have a life in professional sports, but my children were going to grow up here in the offseason. They would learn how to respect the water. They’d learn how to respect nature. They’d learn how to respect family.

Sierra and Emily locked arms and huddled closer to the fire. “How long do you think the bromance stuff will go on?” Sierra asked. “I’m starving and freezing.”

Cole walked over to the fire. “All right, ladies, I think these bad boys are ready.” He grabbed a bucket and started shoveling the hot oysters into the empty barrel. “Who wants the first one?”

“I’ll take one.” Emily raced around the side of the roasting station to join Cole.

He slipped on a heavy work glove and began separating the shells. “Here you go. First one of the oyster roast. Hot off the fire.”

Emily smiled at him as he leaned closer, dangling the oyster out of her reach. “Cole, stop.”

I felt Sierra’s gaze as I watched her friend and my cousin. She joined me away from the fire.

“Nice toast.” She bumped my side with her hip.

“You’re the one who said I should try it.” I sipped on the drink. I was enjoying it more than any glass of wine I had ever tried. Too bad Sierra couldn’t have a taste.

“And it was perfect.” She smiled.

I laughed. “You know I almost didn’t think I was going to make it through it.”

Sierra turned toward me, sliding her free hand into mine. “I knew you could do it.” She bit down on her bottom lip. “So, what exactly is your favorite thing on this island?”

“You even have to ask?” I brushed my lips across her mouth. “I’ve never been so happy since you moved back here with me.” I felt the familiar sparks her kisses always stirred. “Part-time, or whatever you call our back and forth to Florida.”

“You weren’t too happy when you found out you had to lug my boxes down ten flights of stairs or when the moving truck got a flat tire in Alabama. Was it worth it?” She batted her eyes at me.

I ran a hand along her face, and held her chin between my thumb and finger. “Darlin’, nothing has ever been more worth it.” I closed the distance between us, and sometime during the kiss, we both lost our glasses.

“Eh-hem. Excuse us,” Emily called. “We have a boat to christen with champagne. Focus, you two.”

“You got it, girl.” I grabbed Sierra by the hand and tugged her toward the shoreline.

Emily held up the bottle of champagne she had chosen for this occasion. Cole snagged it and faced the boat.

“Just like in batting practice,” I called.

He laughed as he pulled the bottle back, focused on the target he selected on the bow, and swung forward with the full force of his arm. We cheered as the bottle shattered along the beach.

“How was that?” Cole turned to face the group.

“Let’s take her out, and then I’m headed inside. It’s damn cold.” I hopped onto the boat.

“I hear ya, man.” Cole placed Emily inside the boat before jogging to the other side to shove her off. Sierra reached for my hand as I helped her step over the side.

“You ok with this?” I asked her. “You can stay here until we get back.”

She shook her head. “No way. I’m in this with you. The boats. The island. Football. All of it.”

I leaned over to steal a kiss, feeling the softness of her lips.

“Good. I’ll get you home soon,” I promised.

It was playoff time. And we had decided to spend some holiday time at the island before heading back to Orlando. I tried not to let the post-season get under my skin. Sierra said it was meant to be this way. We could focus on each other and the baby.

There was always next season.

I stood at the captain’s chair until Sierra walked up to me. I sat her on my lap and steered over her shoulder. Maybe it was a small island, and maybe she didn’t always love it like I did, but I knew Sierra was happy here. We had found something in each other that couldn’t be abandoned or ignored. If that wasn’t love, I didn’t know what love was.

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Naughty Notes

Y’all, this book means so much to me. I don’t know if I can tell you how much I love the water and how many epic summer romances I’ve had at the beach. Maybe you catch a hint of that in here. Blake has a softer side than a lot of my alphas, and I think that’s what I love about him. He struggles with being a leader. He struggles with his family’s past. He has a broken heart and is scared to death to fall in love again. Haven’t you met that guy before? The one who is hot as hell, but he’s damaged beyond belief? Yeah, well that’s Blake. And I love him for it! Because eventually we all know that guy—the one who says he can’t commit or can’t love again—he does. He always does.

I hope you loved reading Dirty Game. I loved writing it and bringing these characters to you.

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