Advanced Cunnilingus: Rare Oral Sex Techniques & Secrets to Giving Her Wild and Explosive Orgasms

Copyright © 2012 by Sean B

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Contents

The Greatest Oral Sex Tips Ever!              7

Burn This Into Memory              9

The Pleasure of Knowing Her Intimate Anatomy              13

The One and Done Method              17

4 Mistakes That Kill The Power of Her Orgasms              27

Increasing Her Capacity for Multiple Orgasms              40

The Blended Orgasm              41

Triple Delight Technique              42

Assisters (Small Orgasmic Boosters)              44

Finishers (Large Orgasmic Boosters)              45

Licking Themes              50

Pelvic Floor Pulses (PFPs):              54

Shower of Kisses Technique              57

The Half Crescendo Technique              62

The Full Crescendo Technique              64

Grand Finale #1              66

Grand Finale #2              76

Conclusion              78

The Greatest Oral Sex Tips Ever!

Get Your Fix Now.

I know some of you only care about actual techniques; well here is a bunch at the beginning in random order.  Get all the technique stuff out of your system now.  Techniques and tricks are rendered nearly useless when you understand how to build crazy amounts of tension using teasing/anticipation and a leading, assertive attitude. Techniques are to be used as assistants, not as the foundations of your skill set.

Frenulum Frenzy

Make sure you apply enough lube or spit when you stimulate her frenulum.  Go really slow and allow her to feel all of the subtle nuances while in the area. Slow and steady rhythmic stroking of this area builds her up to a powerful orgasm.

Perineal Sponge Massage

Insert a finger up to about the 2nd knuckle and then pull down and you should feel her pelvic floor muscles through a bit of spongy tissue. This is her perineal sponge, an area filled with pleasurable nerves. Apply downwards pressure on the spot to relax those muscles.  Doing the come hither motion on this spot, you should be able to feel her inner anal sphincter. Try this while simultaneously licking her clitoral frenulum for a volcanic combination.

Ghost Penis: Put a finger or two inside her and apply gentle downward pressure.  It feels like a penis is thrusting inside her. Massage around in a U-shaped motion as if you were cleaning syrup from a bowl by swiping your fingers around its edges.

Return of the Ghost Penis:  Slide your fingers all the way inside her so that her cervix is resting on top of your fingers.  You are now in the deepest part of her vagina. Curl your fingers into a hook and gently pull downwards.  Combine this technique with sucking on her clit and she'll be in heaven.  You can also add in some anal play or narrate a dirty fantasy.

Fruit Mouth:  You know the shape your mouth takes when it's on a peach or a soft juicy pear?  Well use that mouth shape over her vulva to suck on her clitoris. 

Hood Rolls:  It is what it sounds like; you take the clitoral hood between your thumb and index finger.  You can softly pinch and roll it.  Remember rolling balls of glue back in the day? Well, roll away baby!  Start nice and slow at first to let her feel the subtle sensations. Let the clitoral glans and shaft “pop” back and forth while holding the clitoral hood.

G-spot Sandwich:  This is simply placing gentle pressure behind her pubic bone to enrich the G-spot stimulation.  It feels more complete when you surround the G-spot with pleasure from the top and the bottom. It also causes the G-spot to move “down” more so you can better stimulate it.

Burn This Into Memory

Anybody sharing/giving sex advice (that’s worth something) should always say “Every woman is different, test and calibrate what works with her and then continue that.”  Everything presented in this book are ideas you need to test with you lady to see which ones she prefers.

The arousal and sexual tension you generate beforehand are more important that the licks/strokes/caresses you do to send her over the edge. The secret to giving women crazy orgasms that leave them delirious and speaking incoherently is…

Wait for it…

Teasing her longer than she can stand it.  Simple right?  Yet every guy thinks he is providing enough. What you think and what actually occurs are two separate things however.

Get her to verbally beg you to lick her and she’ll nearly pass out in pleasure from the first lick.  If you picked up my Cunnilingus 101 eBook, then you already have a great foundation for teasing, the “One and Done” method is based heavily on large amounts of sweet, agonizing teases.

Focusing too much on the physical techniques is the mark of a weak lover.  A woman’s sexual beast is unleashed by the lover who leverages mental arousal and foreplay.  Physical techniques should be a supplement to your ability to mentally arouse her.

You may already think you are great at increasing sexual tension and “foreplay.”  And it’s that attitude that leads me to believe you aren’t.  Why?  Because those who are truly great at anything ALWAYS know that there is room for improvement…it’s how the best get better, by constantly pushing themselves and never believing they are done growing.  After all, if you are at the pinnacle, then that leaves no room for growth.  I’m willing to bet your lady thinks you could improve, but she’s afraid to say something unless you bring it up.

Don’t believe me? Then ask her.

Oral sex is less about fancy tongue flicks, and more so about your ability to build massive sexual tension before you start licking her. Nearly any lick, flick, suck, stroke, et cetera will work on a woman who is begging for orgasmic release.  Building sexual tension is one of the overlooked aspects of sex that is preventing you from giving her those powerful orgasms you both fantasize about.

The kind of orgasms that leaves her speechless and wanting to do favors for you; after her long nap of course.  The orgasms from proper sexual tension leave women deliciously drained; if she often does not need to recover after you’ve gone down on her…you got work do to.  Luckily, you picked up this guide.

But I don’t consider myself an expert on anything. I’m constantly testing and revising my mindset and techniques in all areas of my life.

Sexual explorations with women happen to a vice of mine.

Short Version: Build massive sexual tension. Focus on mentally arousing her. You want her to be so aroused from teasing that she’s frustrated and almost angry at you. But her craving for orgasm will supersede those emotions once you give her that first lick.

Your Sex Life Is Your Responsibility

What you choose to do with this information I share is entirely up to you.

Most people will read through this, get a little excited, and not follow through with it.  Most will pass this advice off: “I already know this” and completely forget it. 

Please don’t forget that common knowledge isn’t always common practice. Knowing something and applying it often enough for mastery are two different things. If you have a “I know that already” pop into your mind, stop and ask yourself if you are APPLYING that knowledge rather than just retaining it in memory.

The sad part is that those people live in a dream.  A dream world where they believe that everything is fine… they believe they have a “good sex life” and so they keep doing what they have always done, until she gets tired.

That’s BULL! 

Do what you’ve always done and you’ll get what you always got.  Thinking that no effort is required is naïve and idealistic. A “good sex life” is the enemy of a great sex life.

Don’t be that guy.  Be strong enough to face your mistakes and the reality of your sex life. Be willing to get your hands dirty ; )

Play hard and play to win. Buckle up.

P.S. Each one of the book sections can be read separately.  Don’t try to devour this whole book, digest it in one or to sections at a time.

The Pleasure of Knowing Her Intimate Anatomy

Before fully diving in, open this up and view while reading the following section

http://tinyurl.com/vulvapicture

Mons Pubis

       Responds to pressure and massage (especially near her front commissure)

       Push it back with your hand/thumb to expose her clitoral glans

Front Commissure

       This isn’t commonly talked about so I’ll give you the location: the area where her clitoral shaft juts away from her pubic bone.  It’s below the mons pubis, where the outer labia meet.  The area is almost equivalent to the base of a man’s penis.

       Loves pressure and pulsing stimulation (repeatedly “ apply pressure and release”)

       Very sensitive to pressure, apply firmer pressure there when she is about to orgasm

o        Don’t get crazy with the pressure just because I said “firmer.”

Outer Labia

       Not as sensitive as most areas of the vulva

o        My guess:  due to their constant contact with clothing and their inherent protective properties or fewer nerve endings

       Loves to be massaged with fingers and gently pulled on

       Responds well to being sucked into the mouth with a gentle pulling motion

o        This indirectly wakes up her clitoral glans and causes heightened arousal due to anticipated pleasure

Inner Labia

       Very sensitive and delicate (more so than the outer labia)

       Engorge and change color as she becomes more aroused

       Likes direct touch and can tolerate a fair amount of pressure as well

       Combine massaging them with sucking/licking her clitoral glans for more pleasurable sensations

       Massaging them while manually stimulating her glans can make her swoon as well

       Responds well to broad, flat tongue strokes…really likes being licked with the underside of the tongue also

o        For extra brownie points from her, follow up the wide, slow tongue lick with a stiff, pointed tip which traces up and down both labium

Clitoral Hood

       Very sensitive

       Responds to kissing, licking, and rhythmic caresses all of which indirectly stimulate the clit

       Prepares the area for more direct stimulation later on

       Give special attention to underside of the hood (the area in direct contact with the glans)

o        It loves to be licked, though not all women like it…which could be said for almost everything I’ve written on this site haha.

Clitoral Frenulum

       Very sensitive

       Responds to touch and pressure

       Lick her here to tease the clit out for some play

       This area always needs to be wet/lubricated if you are going to stimulate it

Vaginal Entrance (introitus)

       Less sensitive than clitoral glans (maybe equal to inner labia or a bit more)

       Two very sensitive spots (according to Marcy Michaels): 4 & 8 o’clock about ¼” inside the entrance

       Responds well to licking, kissing, and stroking

o        Try gently circling it with your finger while swirling your tongue around her clit at the same time

Fourchette

       Likes tongue strokes and lightly grazing fingertips that play with it and the vaginal entrance

       Give it gentle (GENTLE) playful pinches

Perineum

       Responds well to pressure, fingertip grazes, and tongue strokes

       Apply pressure here and to the front commissure at the same time to give her a nice “completely held and grounded” feeling while licking her clitoris

       Has erectile tissue just like most of the clitoral network

       Stimulate it both internal and externally by putting your index finger just inside her vagina and pressing it together with your thumb on the outside.

o        Bonus: add front commissure pressure with your other hand

       Likes rhythmic, massage-like pressure “pulses”

Why Does Knowing Her Anatomy and How Each Part Responds To Pleasure Even Matter?

1) Gives you more tools to paint your oral canvas with

2) Knowledge of her least and most sensitive areas give you more “orgasmic intensity” options: a giant one that builds and builds or simply using them to build her to a “normal” orgasm

Moving from indirect to direct and less sensitive to more sensitive is a great way to bring her to a juicy orgasm…the kind where she wants to cuddle up and quickly falls asleep afterwards. 

So how do you use your oral seduction skills to get her all bubbly, cuddly, and sleepy post-orgasm? 

The “One and Done” Method!

The One and Done Method

It begins slowly and crescendo's into a massive orgasm, after you have her teetering on the edge for a while. She'll BEG you to let her explode. And once you do, make sure your head doesn't get crushed between her legs and nearly pass out like I almost did. Hold her hips down. You have been warned.

Foreplay until the First Lick

Cunnilingus isn’t solely foreplay…and if you treat it as such, it’s time to expand your perspective.

Consider that going down on her requires foreplay as well.  In fact, if you want to give her insane-ass orgasms…then going down on her DEMANDS the buildup that foreplay provides.  I hate the term “foreplay,” but that’s a whole ‘nother book entirely.

Or, here are my thoughts on the label “foreplay”—the mini version:

Thinking of something as “pre” anything tends to knock you off center because you want the thing, not the “pre” stage.  Foreplay is framed in most of our minds as “pre” and not the actual thing.  Therein lies the problem, you forget to enjoy where you actually ARE because you’re busy trying to get SOMEWHERE ELSE.

2 Keys to Oral Foreplay:

1] S-L-O-W.

At least 2x slower than you think you should be going at all times, until the “POUNCE” (keep reading to find out what it is and when to do it).

2] Forget about her orgasm (or as I like to call it “the fun paradox”)

…follow her pleasure…chase IT instead.  You are now on an exploratory adventure of her body…seeking to release all the pleasure from every inch you kiss, lick, touch, and suck.

I’m serious.

Forget about her orgasm for now.

If she doesn’t come, trust me she’ll return tomorrow, legs spread and willingly waiting for you.

Step 1: Heighten Sensations

Your focus at this stage is to bring her awareness to her pleasure. For the time being, use slow teasing and sensate focus via dirty talk.

Sensate Focus via Dirty Talk

Dirty talk can be used in a variety of ways but for now just use it to direct her sexual energy where you want it.  For example, let’s say you want to tease her clit without even stimulating it yet. Dirty talk is great for this.  As you are licking or massaging her nipples say something like,

“You can almost feel that in your clit can’t you?”

“Imagine the pleasure spreading there when I [touch/lick/kiss] your nipples.”

If you say this with anything other than 100% conviction, it will fail.  If she doesn’t respect you enough sexually (AKA you’ve given her a multitude of mind-blowing sexual experiences), it will fail.

Or when you are kissing her legs, tell her to “send” or the let the feelings “travel” to her clit or vulva.

Or you can tell her to focus her attention wherever you are (instead of where you’ll end up).  If you’re kissing her inner thighs, ask her (this is a question with an assertive tone, by the way),

“You like it when I kiss you there, don’t you?”

And then kiss her there again to cement her focus on the pleasure you are providing. Only ask her when you see/feel her enjoying it. Also, I’m not saying to run your mouth the entire time you are “downtown,” but dirty talk is very effective when used correctly.

Let the Slow Teasing Begin…

Start with kissing her and traverse her body with lustful lips and hands. Spend lots of time at her favorite hot spots, especially if she loves breast and nipple play.

Continue on down as she gets hotter, but leave your hands on her breasts/nipples. Work your way down with kisses/licks along the rib cage and down her side ending up kissing the crest of her hip bone (iliac crest) and along her inner thigh. Kiss around her vulva teasingly and kiss/caress down the opposite side of her body ending up on her other inner thigh.

Slowly glide your hands up one thigh and then kiss your way back down that inner thigh.  Place slow, full mouth kisses around her vulva, almost touching her outer lips but not quite.  Now run your fingers slowly up her other thigh and kiss down to her vulva again. Stroke her legs and then caress back up to her vulva.

Key teasing strategy: “aim” all sensations back to her vulva and tease the surrounding area to get the attention of all of her “pleasure nerves.”

Mix in some “sensate focus dirty talk.”

Spiraling is a great way to build anticipation. It’s my fancy term for aiming your teasing stimulation to her vulva with clit as the untouched center of the spiral. Start near her mons pubis and make your teasing areas smaller and smaller until you are only kissing and caressing her vulva, then finally her clit.

Don’t “spiral” her vulva more than 3-4 times…we want to orally seduce her, not orally bore or frustrate her.

When your lady starts moaning, gasping, or breathing slightly faster, that’s your signal for more speed and intensity.  It’s very likely that all of those are happening now. However, if you are going for the “one and done” (described below) then ignore the green lights for right now unless she’s looks at you like you called her a bitch in a heated argument.

Her pleasure just turned into major frustration.  If that’s the case, skip to the “One and Done” section.  If you’re getting that face and you haven’t even started licking her clit yet…you’re one hell of a oral seducer…

Or an idiot for not noticing you “bunched up” her arousal instead of spreading it out. However, it’s no longer fun for her and she needs the release.  Lick her into bliss.

Sidenote: “About that Face…” I’ve gotten it more than a few times. Used to be scary back in the day…now it’s just fun when they do it. If you’re crazy like me, give her some dominant eye contact and tell her to “say please.” This way she is aware that you know she’s frustrated. It’s essentially, you saying “I knew that baby…I got this, now tell me what you want.” You’re cool, calm, and collected…she on the other hand is about to explode and wants release.

Part of the fun of oral sex is withholding release and driving her crazy with pleasure. If you’ve never had a woman say “fuck you” in a joyful fit of frustration and then some “Thank you’s” in the end of same session…you’re not having as much fun as you could be.

If you want to avoid her “WTF face of frustration” in the future, you have to learn how to control her arousal by giving her time to let some steam off. The more you build sexual tension, the more rest periods/longer pauses you need as you progress with your teasing stimulation. Or you can learn to plateau her arousal and let it build more slowly.

Step 2: Crafting Your First Lick So She NEEDS and Craves the Release

Now I bet even you are ready to dive in…and dive in you shall.  Place some kiss and gentle love bites along both her inguinal creases (Google it, bet you didn’t know that place had a name did you?).

Move closer to her outer lips and kiss around them. Suck on each of her outer labia and slightly tugging on each one.

Begin the oral dance by spreading her lips so her inner labia are showing, or get her to do it.

The first lick needs to be painfully slow.  It establishes the mood of the entire session for you and her.  You want this session to be slow, juicy, and full of pleasure…so make your first lick mimic that.  You want to take her breath away and have her hips arching to the ceiling, undulating to find your tongue once the lick is over.  Aim to accomplish that with your first lick.  Make her remember the first lick for days.

Now…

Place your tongue on her perineum and fourchette.  You want your tongue to be wide, soft, flat and wet with a somewhat firm pressure. Next, as slowly as you possibly can (at LEAST 5 seconds), begin licking upwards all the way to her front commissure. 

Give special attention to her clitoral frenulum by placing a few quick licks with a soft-tipped tongue. Once you reach her glans, ease up on the pressure.  You want to lick her clit, just barely.  Barely!  A “lighter than feather light” touch. Exert no pressure at all.

A surge of sexual bliss will shoot through her body.

Switch to a firmer pressure on the rest of her hood and front commissure.  Begin to lick your way back to her perineum, but SKIP her glans.

Step 3: Stalking Her Orgasm: The “One and Done” Method

Remember when I mentioned how to give her an orgasm so strong that she just wants to cuddle up and fall asleep afterwards…

BAM! Here you go.

Everything up until this point has allowed you to tease out a big juicy orgasm.  Notice how you moved from her inner thighs (less sensitive) to her clitoral glans (most sensitive)…AND you took your sweet time.

You don’t need to go this slow this often because you want to give her a variety of oral ecstasy with your tongue and hands. Take your time and tease her by stimulating the less sensitive areas, as she becomes frustrated, move to a more sensitive area, always saving the clit for last.  The time you take to move from a “less area” to a “more area” is a key to the big juicy orgasm.

Move slow and steady, from least sensitive to most. That’s what you’ve been doing this whole time, hopefully.  That’s the key.  Allow her orgasm to creep up and take her by surprise. Once you got to her clit you didn’t immediately attack it either.  Maintain your slow rhythm.

Focus on her pleasure and NOT her orgasm.  Follow her pleasure.

Add G-spot stimulation (or A-spot for a crazier effect…depending on which one your lady responds better to) and I call that the “one and done.”  Even ladies who love multiples fall victim to the deliciously slow buildup of a giant “one and done” orgasm.

Add a gentle, but firm and slow G-spot stimulation with your slow and steady licks.  Think of it as you slowly teasing and pulling her orgasm out of her when it is inevitable that she will explode.

Stalk her orgasm.  This is oral seduction, remember?

Patience.

Make this deliberately take a while.  Build an unsatisfied urge for release

This is Duck Duck Goose…for grown-ups.

And you’re “it,” you need to tag her, and make sure she can’t see you (or her orgasm) coming. You feel me?

Keep her arousal on a positive gradient, but at a slow rate of increase.  Slow licks, and slow firm G-spot massage. Stay slow and steady until she’s one lick away from orgasm, and then overwhelm her with licking speed and G-spot pressure.

Once she is on the verge, I mean one more lick and she’s convulsing…POUNCE!

Give her aburst of fast feather lite tongue strokes combined with firmer, fast G-spot strokes.

Timing the POUNCE is important; if you’re slightly off you can nearly reset her arousal and lose the “orgasm momentum” you built.  This is why it’s important she be on/slightly past the point of no return.

One and done didn’t work?…She’s not sleep? Woe is you, right?

Regardless, you win…she’s all bubbly, cuddly, and in your arms falling asleep

OR

Wide awake with a throbbing, aching desire to have you inside of her

Life is good.

Give her oral sex that is unexpected and enthusiastic while not needing (or sometimes, allowing) anything in return. This…is the way of oral seduction.

Savor her.

Sidenote: Your homework: to get her instantly aroused again, text her… or better yet whisper it in her ear the next day as you press her against the wall and grind against her: “Remember that first lick?  How slooooow and deliciously painful it was?” She may even shiver a bit while reminiscing ;)

4 Mistakes That Kill The Power of Her Orgasms

Before Giving Her Oral, There The Two Mindsets You MUST Have:

1] There is more to going down on her than mastering clever tongue moves and other techniques.  Sure, that part is important, but if you don’t understand the mental aspects of great sex, technical sex skills mean jack-shit when used alone.

2] Take a pleasure oriented approach, not a goal (i.e. orgasm) oriented one.  This takes pressure off of her and you.  Do what feels good to you AND her. 

Mistake #1: No Mental Foreplay

Does this scenario sound familiar to you? You’re both in bed and you want sex, you try to initiate but she turns or slightly moves away from you.  You end up frustrated, and she ends up bored and uninterested. 

Know why that is?  You’ve done nothing to cause her to crave sex. 

What’s worse is that every time you do this…it continually decreases her interest in sex with you.  Triple that if she isn’t having orgasms.

Here’s the root of the problem:

If you are starting foreplay when you are in the bed…you are doing it wrong, and you began too late.  She’s not even thinking about sex, so she isn’t mentally or physiologically prepared for it.

Great foreplay starts before you even touch her sexually.  Make love to her mind first and her body will gladly follow.

I mean think about it, imagine if you were at work and she texted you saying how she couldn’t wait for you to get home so she give you a blowjob.  She then sent further texts delving into dirty details. How much work would you get done after that?

If you remember one thing from this book, remember this:

Sex and Orgasms For Women Are (Almost) Entirely Mental

Mental Foreplay 101

This topic alone would require another book written about it. For now, I’ll give you an idea or two to get your started.

What are mental aspects of oral sex?  A lot of things can be.  Dirty text messages for example.

If you’ve never done this before, then stick with describing things you want to do to her in the future (later on that night, tomorrow, etc.)  Describe how giving her oral makes you feel, how you can’t wait to taste her again, and how good she tastes.  What you have done is planting sexual seeds in her mind. 

Now she is thinking about the sensations of your tongue on her and how it will make her feel.  Imagining all of this tease s her mentally and get her hot.  She is now anticipating what you will do and this sets off a mental chain of sexual thoughts.  Continue to text her randomly because it increases her mental arousal.  

Dirty Talk

Dirty talk I would say is the ultimate mental foreplay tool. For the sake of brevity I’ll keep it simple.

Describe What You Are Going To Do To Her,

Before You Do It…in Torrid Juicy Detail

Then do it. Give her commands or get her to repeat certain phrases you said by telling her to “say it” or “tell me.” Whisper dirty phrases in her ear in a dominant tone of voice. 

It’s often a challenge to dirty talk and give her oral simultaneously. I tend to avoid it.  I create anticipation by dirty talking beforehand about all the things I’m going to do to her with my mouth, tongue, and fingers. 

I do this as I’m kissing and caressing her body. I whisper into her ear with my body pressed against hers or I kiss her and then tease her. Then I build anticipation by breaking the kiss to talk dirty and start kissing again afterwards.

I’d stay away from crazy name calling until you have enough confidence/swagger to handle the situation. Especially if you think “my dirty little fuck slut” will backfire, haha!  Stick with descriptive dirty talk, describing what she does to you  or what you are about do to her (emotionally, physically, and/or mentally).

Anticipation

Teasing and anticipation are mental foreplay as well.  They cause her to focus on where you are or where you’re going next.  For example, you can tease her before oral sex by leaving her panties on and tracing around her vulva with your finger. 

Use your finger to mimic tongue strokes near her clitoris through her panties.  Pretend you’re going to remove her panties, but only breathe on her skin. Tease her further through her panties. When you’re ready, grab her hips and pull her to you.  Leverage mental foreplay to affect her physical arousal and she’ll orgasm HARD every time

Make her hungry for it, and then when you feed her, satisfy her beyond what she knew she was capable of, thus leaving her even hungrier for what happens next time.

Mistake #2: Pathetic Patience and Weak Lackluster Foreplay

You only want to give her orgasm right? You’re frustrated from the last time you tried to give her oral or you’re unsure. What’s the problem with being impatient you ask?

2 major reasons:

#1

Your impatience can be felt by her, believe or not.  It is in your movements, voice, and body tension.  It causes her to feel anxious…she knows you want to give her an orgasm and it places pressure on her to “perform” and have one.  She doesn’t want to disappoint you and make you feel punished by your efforts.

The key to a woman’s orgasm is total relaxation.  Stress and anything that causes it, hinders her ability to have an orgasm.   Oral sex is the easiest way (for now…) to give your woman an orgasm. It can also cause stress if you approach it the wrong way or if you suck at it.

#2

Your impatience is directly related to the quality of foreplay you give her. 

Great foreplay = highly aroused and everything you do brings her closer to orgasm easily. 

Piss poor foreplay = you being impatient wondering why she hasn’t had an orgasm yet .

Now you’re trying to stroke/thrust/lick faster or slower…hoping anything will work at this point.

When I say piss poor foreplay, I don’t mean the same ole knowledge you hear time and time again when it comes to foreplay: “slow down, do it longer, and more often.”  While that advice is important, I can only assume it is written by those who have never seen a woman get aroused and come faster than most men can. Women take longer to have an orgasm when you only stimulate them physically without a strong emotional connection and no mental foreplay in the mix.  Keep Mistake #1 in mind.

The problem with pathetic foreplay is that you aren’t doing enough to get her highly aroused regardless of time spent “foreplaying.” Sometimes if she is highly mentally aroused, only a few minutes of foreplay are all it takes. 

You have to be able to read her and feel out how much foreplay she needs each time. 

You are wasting time by not paying attention to her, and it’s only going to cause you further frustration when trying to give her orgasmic oral sex.

Furthermore, Impatience impedes being able to read where she is in terms of arousal. 

If your impatience is due to frustration, fatigue, or nervousness…calm yourself by accepting whatever she brings (physically, emotionally, and/or mentally) and use it to your advantage.

Give her what she needs in that moment to be relaxed AND highly aroused. If her body is resisting you, stop responding from a place of reactivity (allowing your emotions to dictate your actions). Stop following her lead.   In other words, do what it takes to remove her tension THEN begin stimulating her once she is relaxed.

Also, being impatient can come off as uncaring and not having the ability to relax into your own emotional/mental state.  Which devalues you in her eyes…and this prevents you from fully gaining her sexual trust and thus her relaxation.  No relaxation, no orgasm.

Mistake #3: Not Calibrating/Adapting

This is quite possibly the worst mistake (for you both) because it shows her that you aren’t paying attention to her body AND it’s the fastest route to “no orgasm land.” You end up maintaining a licking technique, speed, or rhythm that she doesn’t like so she never builds any sexual tension and thus does not have an orgasm. 

Not calibrating means there was a change that has occurred in her body and your response (or lack thereof) wasn’t what she needed at that point in time.  Common calibrating errors include:

       Licking too fast or too hard

       Licking the wrong speed (she wants you to lick X but you’re licking Y)

       Licking the same pattern/rhythm when her body isn’t showing signs of increased arousal

       Not doing X long enough 

The last mistake above results from being unaware of her arousal level.  She may have wanted you to stay with the same technique “X” but you went to technique Y and now she has to build up to that level of pleasure all over again. 

Wait until her body is giving you signs of decreased arousal or plateauing before you change anything. Also, if she is about to come, DO NOT CHANGE ANYTHING until she has an orgasm.

Take away point: Not calibrating is the result of not paying attention and lack of knowledge about female sexuality.

Going down on a woman is about balance. 

Stillness and movement. 

Fast and slow.

Hard and soft. 

Long and short.

Use the two extremes to provoke an unquenchable hunger for orgasm in her.  You can create orgasmic works of art with your tongue if you flirt with the two extremes.

Paying Attention and Awareness of Her Arousal

There are too many nuances of paying attention to write here.  I’ll eventually tackle it in a newsletter, but for now here are some basics.

All women will tell you what they need to orgasm…using their breath, hips, muscle tension, sounds, etc. 

PAY ATTENTION! 

Women vary in how they like to be stimulated, how much pressure they like, speed, rhythm, etc.  Learning how to go down on her better can be as simple as listening to her body and responding with what she needs in order to be taken higher at that moment.

Generally speaking, if she likes what you are doing she will move towards you and vice versa if you are doing something that is painful or unpleasant.

Knowing when to back off or increase the stimulation conveys to her that you care and you are paying close attention.

Paying attention to her imbues sexual mindfulness and sensitivity towards her pleasure.  Paradoxically, the quickest way to enhance this sexual mindfulness is to do everything slowly and gauge her response to your stimulation. 

•          Is her skin flushing?

•          Did her breathing changing?

•          Are her nipples harder? 

•          Is her vulva more engorged and wet? 

•          Is she moaning more or less? Why? 

•          Is her body moving toward you? (i.e. asking you to enter her or give her more)

•          Is her body saying slow down or increase the speed?

Pay attention to which tongue strokes her body responds most positively to.  Use those strokes and the PFPs (mentioned later) to give her to orgasm after orgasm.  Notice the rhythms she responds to as well.  However, the main thing to notice is changes from a general baseline of arousal.

3 Major Areas to Be Aware of When Giving Her Oral Sex

#1: Muscle tension

Good muscle tension is usually felt when she grabs your arms or her thighs squeeze you. Having her hold your arms is a great biofeedback mechanism. Hands don’t lie.

Her Hands And Body Act As A Voice For Her Pleasure …Pointing You Towards Orgasm

Good muscle tension gets progressively tighter as you stay within the “arousal groove” she needs to orgasm. Her thighs and lower abdomen are great places to notice tension, especially bad/sudden muscle tension.

Sudden tension can be good if there are no other signs (moving away, painful sounds, etc.) to convey otherwise and it means you have struck clitoral gold.  Bad tension is sudden and accompanied by other signs you usually miss:  sighs of frustration, painful moans/sounds, a sudden muscle twitch, her moving away from you.  It means you have done something painful or uncomfortable…

#2: Breathing rhythm

Breathe is tricky to pay attention to because it is easiest way women fake orgasms along with sounds.  Most women however have a certain breathing pattern that occurs just before and during orgasm.  It’s usually erratic, yet has a weird rhythm to it. One usually dominates; the thing to pay attention to is any changes in the breath…not one or two patterns.

Near orgasm, some women have a rhythmic breathing pattern with intermittent “choppiness” and some have a mainly erratic pattern that has a bit of rhythm to it.  If you notice her breathing change when you do something (gasp, deep fast breathing, etc), you’ve found a great rhythm, speed, or pressure.  Don’t change anything (within the context of everything above).

#3: Movements

I’ve inadvertently covered movements already.  Good = she moves toward the stimulation and bad = vice versa.  Most women have an “orgasm blueprint.”  For each type of orgasm, their body does the same movements (relatively)….like orgasmic muscle memory.

To reiterate, women tend to do the same movements, sounds, etc. for every orgasm.  Get her to masturbate in front of you in order to find out her clitoral orgasm blueprint so you can know if she is close to orgasm or if she is faking orgasm.

Lots of women’s’ legs shake a certain way or they always grab something a particular way or have a particular breathing pattern…you’ll find out her idiosyncrasies by giving her orgasms.   One girl I was with always had a shallow gasp then a quick exhale followed by multiple deep exhales with a pause between each one.   Her le petite morte was truly a work of art. Jesus it was beautiful.

Ahem…let’s move on.

During orgasm a woman’s body moves with the rhythm OR possibly little to no movement in order to “soak up” the pleasure.  Remember nothing here is set in stone, and just the observations of one guy.

The purpose of this section was to give you some basic insight into knowing when to slow down, stay the same (to allow her arousal to build), stop, or speed up your stimulation.

Psychological Aspects of Paying Attention

Since oral sex can often lack the strong connection of intercourse, attentiveness conveys that you are completely present with her.  Attentiveness to her body, sounds, and movement can be a bridge to increasing the emotional connection she feels.  This makes it easier for her to orgasm because she trusts that you will adjust and calibrate to what happens.  She then relaxes even deeper due to you paying attention to her.

Also, don’t be afraid to pause and give yourself enough time to notice her response.  She certainly won’t mind and it serves to tease her even more.  Give her a long slow lick, penetrating eye contact, and then pause to caress her entire body. Now lick her when she shows signs of craving your tongue again.

Mistake #4: Misunderstanding How Arousal and Stimulation Are Linked

I’d like you to think about how all these mistakes relate to one another.  It will help solidify the info and better understand this mistake.  This mistake is the reason that she seems to “stall out” and never reach orgasm.  It’s due to not paying attention.  There are at least two ways that arousal and stimulation are linked. 

Inconsistent Technique

Variations in techniques and rhythm are most useful if they are increasing her arousal or at the very least, sustaining her arousal.  It’s possible to give a woman an orgasm with a single rhythm if you are paying attention to her body.  You simply “listen” to when her pleasure is waning and then slow down or change your stimulation. 

Pick a few licking variations, maintain a rhythm that gets her closer to orgasm and focus mainly on where her arousal level is.  Change your technique or rhythm only when her arousal is decreasing; this requires careful attention. Maintaining poor rhythm breaks her concentration on pleasure and makes it difficult for her to have an orgasm.

Pleasure Desensitization

Stimulating the same area the same way for a period of time causes the nerves in that area become less sensitive to pleasure over time (desensitized). Don’t confuse consistent stimulation with rubbing her exactly one way for the entire session because this can numb her clitoris to pleasure.   For example, if you constantly stroke her clit the same way, the pleasure will decrease once nerves have gotten “tired” of that rhythm/speed and send a signal to her brain telling it to dampen the neural firing. 

The purpose of the variety of licks in the beginning is to bypass this habituation until her arousal is high enough so that when she nears orgasm, one constant rhythm is no longer an issue; mixing things up when she is near orgasm just frustrates her.

You can, however, bring a woman to orgasm using one rhythm by simply inserting pauses in between every few strokes/licks to give her nerve pathways a rest.

Increasing Her Capacity for Multiple Orgasms

This is a very simple concept, but takes dedication to master.  So many benefits can be reaped from this practice.  This is about conditioning her body to feel and accept more pleasure.  It will expand her ability to hold “sexual charge.”  This is a cool exercise for you to try as well.

Steps to Orgasmic Edging

1) Bring her to edge of orgasm

2) Stop all motion and tell her to observe the sensations in her body.  Tell her to really relax, let go, and feel the sensations moving through her body.  Remind her to breathe into where she feels the most pleasure and try to “spread” the sensations by focusing on other parts of her body.

3) Repeat steps 1 and 2 at least 3 more times

You’re taking her VERY close to the edge of orgasm and then backing off either by reducing the speed and/or the pressure that you are stimulating her clitoris.  You don’t completely stop stimulating her however. You build up the pleasure and then relax before she comes which will let her ride the orgasmic sensations.

At the very end of this exercise you might want to give her an orgasm.  You don’t want to frustrate her, so tell her in advance.  Something like “I want to take you to the edge of orgasm over and over and let you ride wave after wave of bliss…we’re going to try to sustain that for as long as we can…you up for it?”

Hard to turn down an offer like that.  A lot of times, she’ll have an explosive orgasm and want to continue with the exercise or she’ll want you inside her.

Check out Expanded Orgasm by Patricia Taylor for an elucidated look at this subject.

The Blended Orgasm

Blended orgasms feel insanely good to women because you are stimulating multiple orgasmic spots at once.  Pleasure overload.  Prepare yourself.  She’ll orgasm from clitoral stimulation and G-spot stimulation.  Two orgasms in one.

Key Idea:  Get her to the edge of a clitoral orgasm and switch to stimulating her G-spot for a while without clitoral stimulation.  Build up arousal in her G-spot, and then switch to her clit when she’s ready to have an orgasm again.    Work with them separately, and then try to stimulate them both at the same time.

1) Stimulate her clit until she’s near orgasm

2) Insert a lubricated finger and apply pressure on her G-spot. Add another once she’s warmed-up

3) Experiment with the variety of G-spot strokes mentioned above, while stopping clitoral stimulation

4) When you feel her building up to orgasm from the G-spot stimulation, add clitoral stimulation again

5) Experiment with rotating back and forth between the spots and stimulating them both together

6) Learn to dance with her body and its sensations, don’t try to bring her to orgasm yet…relish her

7) Let her build toward orgasm, but don’t let her go over the edge yet. You’ll be able to feel out how long you want this to take. Sometimes it’ll be 5 minutes, other times up to an hour or more. 

Listen to her body and let it guide you.  If she’s getting frustrated, then give her release.

Next time, do the same with her A-spot.  Or hell, do it next.  Vaginal orgasms don’t need as much recoup time as clitoral orgasms (typically).

Triple Delight Technique

This technique utilizes her orgasmic hot spots, both your hands, and your tongue. It also stimulates a lot more of her clitoral network than just licking her. That’s what makes it a powerful movement. It stimulates her urethral sponge, clitoral shaft, clitoral glans, the hood, the U-spot…you’re stimulating much more of her orgasmic hot spots than she is used to. 

If done slowly and a gradually increase in speed and pressure is used…it can send incredible pleasure throughout her body.

There are several combinations you can try.  I’ll present one variation here. When I say “right hand” or ”left hand” I’m assuming you are right-hand dominant.  If you’re a lefty, just swap the two.

1) Place your right hand’s thumb on her clitoral frenulum.  Make sure your thumb is wet and lubricated.  Begin massaging her frenulum in circles while licking her clit.  Now add your right index and middle fingers to her G-spot as she warms up to the frenulum stimulation.  Massage it in circles also, using slight pressure.

2) Now try moving all three fingers of your right hand as if you were attempting to pick up a pile of salt with them.  Transition to this movement from the circular movements you were making.

Alternate idea: squeeze your thumb together with your index and middle finger (in unison) to “grab” the entire area, sort of like a soft claw. Her G-spot and frenulum are still stimulated, but more of her vulva and vagina get stimulated as well with this “soft claw grabbing” movement

3) Add your left hand to mix by making circles on her front commissure or using your left thumb and index finger to stroke her clitoral shaft as you continue to lick her.

4) Gradually increase your speed and pressure as her breathing becomes shorter.  Listen to her body though; use it to guide your speed and rhythm.  If her body is moving with a certain cadence/rhythm and speed…mimic that cadence and speed with your fingers and tongue. If her body speeds up, you speed up…and vice versa.  Her body intuitively knows how to orgasm, all you need is to listen and calibrate.

Recap

1) Right thumb massages her clitoral frenulum in circles

2) Right index + middle fingers massage her G-spot in circles using slight pressure

3) Left thumb massages front commissure in circles OR strokes her clit along with the left index finger

4) Right hand transitions into “salt pile grabbing” movement while the left hand maintains same motion

5) Add some anal stimulation to heighten her pleasure, if she’s into it.

Assisters (Small Orgasmic Boosters)

Use these to make her orgasms more powerful, as they are occurring. They essentially utilize multiple erogenous zones that add more intensity and flavor to the orgasm via overloading her nerves.

Massaging:

Exactly what it sounds like, while licking her through the orgasm you massage her favorite erogenous zone(s) with your hand(s). Focus mostly on her perineum, clitoral frenulum, vaginal fourchette, her nipples, or her front commissure. Pick no more than one or two.

Tapping and Strumming:

As she’s coming, tap/strum her G-spot, A-spot, pubic mound, perineum, labia, whole anterior vaginal wall with the ends of your index, middle and ring fingers.  This slightly increases blood flow as well as saturate her nerves with pleasure.

Stacking:

As the orgasm begins to fade her clitoris will be very sensitive to any stimulation.  You can combat this by leaving your tongue deadly still on her clit.  If doing that causes her to jerk and spasm due to her clitoral hypersensitivity, then rest your tongue on her clitoral hood. Then start again by giving her VERY light tongue flickers on her clitoris using the tip of your tongue at a frequency of 1 per second after the sensitive starts wearing off. 

Alternating:

If you continue the same motion over and over (and she’s nowhere near orgasm) you’re going to desensitize the area and decrease her pleasure. Alternate your rhythm, speed and pressure so her nerves never get a chance to habituate.

It takes finesse to know when to change up your stimulation because switching too early means you didn’t milk the area for all the pleasure it had and now it’s going to take you slightly longer to give her an orgasm. Pay attention to her body (body language, breathing, facial expressions, movements, etc.) so you know when it’s time to let one area rest while you lick/stimulate another.

Finishers (Large Orgasmic Boosters)

The following techniques I call finishers for two reasons:

1] You want to use them during the final 2-3 minutes of your oral session (i.e. just before she has an orgasm)

2] They are powerful techniques that pull the orgasm out of her by utilizing the tension you’ve built thus far

Suction

Gently place her clitoral glans in between your lips and suck on it as if you were drinking from a straw. Alternatively, suck on her clit and release it.  Sort of like a pacifier, constant pulses of suck and release.

Or give it one long suck before releasing it and repeating. The pacifier-like rhythm seems to work better though; it should be gentle pressure like sucking icing off of your finger. Only use suction on her clitoris when she is highly aroused.  Her clitoris is too sensitive in the beginning to introduce it, and applying suction would feel uncomfortable.

Clitoral Suck and Pop:

Suck her clit into your mouth and move your head away from her body while maintaining suction until it "pops" out of your mouth and the vacuum is lost.  Repeat this with the same speed and pressure, as she gets closer you can increase both. But only increase them if you know her body VERY well, otherwise the increase in speed and/or pressure can actually decrease her arousal.

Frenulum Delight:

This is simply the Clitoral Suck and Pop, followed by a feather-lite lick on her frenulum. Repeat these two motions in sequence until she has an orgasm. You can increase suction (don’t go crazy here!) the closer she approaches orgasm.

Twisted Pleasure:

Make the shape of a gun with your hand. Your thumb should be sticking straight up with your index and middle finger perpendicular to your thumb.  Your ring and pinkie fingers are bent towards your palm. 

Insert your index and middle finger fully into her vagina being careful not to hit her cervix while aiming for her AFE-zone/A-spot. Place the pad of your thumb on her clitoral frenulum.  Gently start twisting your fingers inside her vagina by rotating your wrist.

As you do this, your thumb will be massaging her frenulum and the knuckles of your bent fingers will be nudging against her anus.  Place your lips on her clitoris and use the suction or the “suck and pop” technique above.

She’s getting her clitoris, anus, and vagina stimulated at the same time. This move is one of the most powerful finishers. You could try to stimulate her nipples with your free hand or her A-spot or G-spot simultaneously with her clitoris for an even bigger orgasmic release.

Suck ‘n’ Swirl:

Place your mouth around her clitoris and start applying a constant suction to it.  Slowly start to swirl your tongue around her clitoral glans & frenulum along with the area between her clitoral glans and hood. Don’t just use the tip of your tongue, use as many wide tongue swirls as you can. Your mouth needs to be opened wide enough to allow your tongue to swirl around freely. You want to be able to reach the parts of her anatomy I just mentioned and even the areas just beside her clitoral shaft.

Variations

Popper Swirls:

Perform the suck ‘n’ swirl on her and work up to a nice rhythm. Then pull your head back and away from her clit while maintaining suction on it.  Allow it to pop out of your mouth as you are sucking and swirling your tongue around her clitoris. The key to this is to suck and swirl for a while and smoothly transition into a pause before do the pop. You don’t want the pop to seem “urgent” and “bunched up” against the sucking and swirling you are doing…draw out the pop, make her crave it.

Advanced Suck ‘n’ Swirl:

For the advanced version, you vary the strength and timing of your swirling.  For example, you may start swirling VERY softly for 15-20 seconds before ramping up the pressure to 5-10 seconds of heavy swirling.  Dance between the two pressures until she gets close to orgasm, then pick one and don’t change speed, rhythm, pressure or anything until she comes. The variations you can add to this are endless. For example, you can even add a pattern of licking motions in between the feathery swirls and the heavy pressure” swirls.  Or, you can insert well-timed pauses to bring her close to the edge or to decrease her arousal before building it even higher than before.

When you provide her with these intense tongue movements, use them sparingly.  Don’t use them every session because the novelty will wear off and so will their potency.  In other words, if your variety becomes a consistent thing…it’s predictable.  This kind of predictability lowers her arousal.

Licking Themes

Licking themes are just a way to remember without remembering.  Huh…say what?  Let me explain.  You create a way that you want to lick her, with the basics of oral sex as the underpinnings.  You think of a certain object / concept / phenomenon , anything with a certain motion or characteristic and you apply that to oral sex.

For example, below I have the “Dancing Candle Flame.” You know the behavior of a candle flame, and so you lick her clitoris like a “dancing candle flame.” If you remember the candle’s behavior…you don’t have to remember a routine.  Just think of how a candle reacts when its wick is first lit, how the flame dances and finds a rhythm mid-way through until finally it does a final flickering dance before the candlelight dies. 

Thinking of licking her in themes is a way to make turn oral sex into an art.  Once you have the basics down from the Hot Licks Program, licking themes is the next evolution of “licking routines.” 

The cool part is that you can create your own themes.  The key is to take the qualities / behavior of something and apply it to your licking like its speed, rhythm, shape, movement etc.

I’ll show you three that I just made up on the fly…complete with crazy names and all.

Dancing Candle Flame

When a candle is first lit, the flame is small and then grows larger.  Make your licks the same way.  The flame flickers about, in a variety of directions until it finds a groove.  Give her a variety of licks, but eventually find a rhythm that gets her hotter. 

Once the candle is nearing its end (read: near orgasm), give her a few light licks that take her over the edge and then rest your tongue on her clitoris.

Teasing Feather

Give her very light licks, but with enough pressure so it doesn’t tickle. Avoid her clitoral glans for some time, but lick dangerously close to it.  Lick her clitoral hood, front commissure, and frenulum while dancing near her glans.  Send her into orgasm with a slow and light, but intense rhythm.  Add a slow, wondering finger inside her vagina for more pleasure.

You know how when a feather falls, it sort of has a quick, swaying pendulum-like movement?  Add some of those licks in as well.  The licks would be isolated, and sweep from side to side. The gaps in between each lick, gives her a chance to feel each one better.  This type of lick is more suitable for warming her up for the part above.

Hurricane

The key to this one is lots of intense circular movements, as I’m sure you guessed.  Start with slow circles and progress to even faster ones that will eventually center on her clit.  Explore the entire area near her clitoral glans with circles before you “encircle” her clitoris.

Even Crazier Hurricane:

I may have a hard time explaining this one without demonstrating rotation and revolution. Think of your tongue as a rotating hurricane and its path is revolving around her clitoris and eventually “lands” on it.

Here’s my attempt at depicting this:

The red teardrop represents a clit.  The green circle is your starting location and the red, final location.  I choice this direction because a lot of women are really sensitive in the area that the red circle touches

The circles = your rotating tongue

The colors = your counterclockwise path of revolution (Green = Start)

I told you this is crazy right?  Bear with me.

You are essentially circling near her clit, except where the circle touches that side of her clit is where you lick.  You are licking her clit on the “edge” of the circle as you make tiny rotations near her clit.  Eventually you place the clit in the center of your licking (picture on the far right). 

When she is nearing orgasm suck her clit into your mouth, continue with the gentle suction, and swirl your tongue around it in circles. The good ole suck ‘n’ swirl gets ‘em every time.

Pelvic Floor Pulses (PFPs):

Before you even consider giving her an orgasm from oral sex, you must remember to build anticipation and sexual tension with foreplay.  The more orgasms a woman has the easier and more powerful the subsequent orgasms are.  Orgasms make women more responsive to other forms of sexual stimulation as well.  Cunnilingus is one of the fastest and easiest ways to give a woman an orgasm.

One of the best ways to build sexual tension is to stimulate her body from the periphery to the center.  For example, if you are stimulating her breasts (periphery) then the final place you should stimulate is her nipples (center).  For oral sex, you want to stimulate her from her head and feet, saving her vulva for last. 

Kiss and caress from her head down to her vulva. Break contact by beginning again at her feet and caressing back up to her vulva and then begin to tease that entire area.   While you are kissing and touching her whole body, pay close attention to any areas that arouse her more than others.

Assuming you have thoroughly teased her inner thighs and the crease where her leg meets her vulva, now begin teasing her outer labia.  Spend time kissing, sucking, and licking along her outer labia. 

When she is aching for more, place your tongue on her perineum and slowly lick your way up (stopping to quickly dip your tongue inside her vagina) and give her clitoris a few light and quick licks. If you teased her well, she should be undulating her hips/back or let out a quick gasp when you do

Using PFPs to Make Her Think You’re Reading Her Mind

Want to know exactly which stroke she craves?  PFPs are the answer.

The secret to giving her an orgasm that takes her by surprise is to pay attention to her pelvic floor muscle contractions.  This technique will show you which stroke, lick, speed, pressure, and/or rhythm her body likes best and which combo of the aforementioned will quickly bring her to orgasm.

The secret?...

Her Pelvic Floor Muscles Will Pulse/Contract Involuntarily

When You Discover A Stroke Her Clitoris Really Loves.

When you begin licking her clitoris, slowly slide your index finger into her vagina or place your thumb on her perineum.  As you test various licks, notice if her vagina/perineum pulses or grabs your finger.  Once you find a lick that creates a near-constant pulse, stick with it and begin testing which speed and rhythm create the same near-constant pulsing effect.  

Once you have calibrated those three things, especially the rhythm, she will be well on her way to having an orgasm. Giving your ol’ lady an orgasm is easy as maintaining a consistent rhythm, speed and stroke when you pay attention to her pelvic floor pulses.

How PFPs Can Backfire

1] Overstimulation

PFPs are also caused by overstimulation (the clitoris is VERY sensitive).  If you are paying attention you’ll notice overstimulation because she’ll pull away from you and her body will suddenly jolt.  “Good” PFPs don’t cause this reaction. 

2] Over-Reliance On The Technique

Don’t place all your focus on the PFPs, pay attention to her other signs of arousal and pleasure.  It’s not a miraculous technique, just ONE of many clues her body gives.  Don’t blind yourself to her pleasure by honing in on one thing alone.

Shower of Kisses Technique

(Adopted from CRJ)

Key for Effectiveness: Build Massive Sexual Tension before oral via kissing her and caressing her (before slowly transitioning to oral)

Step 1:

Begin by kissing her entire vulva for 2 – 5 minutes and do absolutely nothing else. Kiss/peck at a rate of 1 per second. This is done everywhere except her clitoral glans.

Start with 50 or so kisses in one spot that’s very close to the head of her clitoris. I recommend the “1 o’clock” area if you can image the face of a clock overlaying her vulva. The flood of kisses in one spot will build sexual tension like crazy if she is use to you attacking the head of her clitoris as soon as you think she’s warmed up enough.

After showering that one spot with kisses, your next goal is to cover every millimeter of skin that spans a 1-inch radius from her vaginal opening.  Still teasingly avoid her clitoral glans.

These kisses are your brush strokes—laying down a very solid foundation onto the canvas that is her vulva.

SIDENOTE: This technique is powerful in that case because of its novelty and the fact that you threw a curve ball.  Sexual tension is heavily affected by novelty and variety. I can guarantee that her most memorable sexual memories are the ones where she was caught off-guard with novelty, variety, and strong emotions.

This off-guard factor is dulled if you are ALWAYS doing something new because novelty has become a predictable pattern. Your variety/novelty has become consistent.  In essence, if you’ve been giving her oral the same way for a while, mixing things up is going to give her more pleasure than if you have been eating her out a different way every time.  Understand?

Step 2:

Give her upward licks across her vaginal opening to her frenulum at a rate of 1 upward lick /2 seconds about 5 – 10 times.  Do not lick her clitoral glans yet, be careful of this when your tongue reaches her clitoral frenulum.

The pleasure obtained here is caused mainly two reasons; both are “movement transitions”.

#1: Changing from kisses to licks

#2: Changing your licking rate. You are transitioning from

1 motion [kisses] / sec  to 1 motion [licks] / 2 sec 

SIDENOTE: You changed your stimulation type and your speed.  Pleasure is mainly created from mechanisms that utilize transitions. Licking is a transition, movement and frequency of said movement.  Just placing your tongue on her isn’t likely to give her an orgasm because no additional sexual tension (energy) via changing your movement (transitions) is being input.

Think about it, if you just put your tongue on her and left it there, she’s not likely to orgasm.  This is because transitions cause sexual tension to build up that lead to orgasm. Sex follows the same principle, it is the constant changing of penis motions (skillful thrusting) that build sexual tension not the simple act of placing your penis inside of her.

Giving her pleasure and unbelievable orgasms come from your ability to deftly influence and control transitions

Step 3:

Now lick her clitoral glans with upward tongue flicks at a rate of 1sec/flick, 5 times

She will most likely have a strong response to this due to the increase in speed and pleasure (assuming her clitoris is more engorged now).  If her reaction isn’t all that strong, no worries.

Step 4: Kiss the head of her clitoris ~30 times at a rate of 1 kiss/sec

Step 5: Give her 5 upward tongue flicks to her clitoris at a rate of 1 flick/sec

Step 6: Kiss the head of her clitoris ~15 times at a rate of 1 kiss/sec

Step 7: Give her 5 upward tongue flicks to her clitoris at a rate of 1 flick/sec

Step 8:  Perform 10+ patterns of 5 kisses followed by 5 upward flicks at a rate of 2(kisses|flicks) /sec

In this particular variation of the Shower of Kisses technique, you are only using kisses and upwards flicks.  The primary tool of building sexual tension is varying the rate and ratio of those upward flicks and kisses.

The ratio created by steps 4 and 5 is 6:1 (30 kisses to 5 flicks). The kiss/flick ratio created by steps 6 and 7 transitions to 3:1. Finally, in step 8 the ratio becomes 1:1 and the speed increases alongside the ratio at a rate of 2 motions/sec.

In essence, you are increasing the amount of pleasure she receives as time progresses. The “ones” that are bolded and underlined represent the most pleasurable sensations to her (the flicks occurring after the soft kisses)

6:1 = 16% of the motions are the “good stuff”

3:1 = 33% of the motions are the “good stuff”

1:1 = Half the time, she’s getting the “good stuff”

Let’s look at it another way. The ratio that provides more of the “good stuff” is going to have a different (higher) level of pleasure even though the motions remained the same.  Imagine the ratio was Milk:Cereal to get a better grasp of the concept.  Assume cereal is the “good stuff.”

It’s the progressiveness of stimulation that women respond best to.  It’s why the “slow start, fast finish” principle works so well. Progressively and steadily building sexual tension is how you give her insane and explosive orgasms, and we haven’t even mentioned including multiple forms of stimulation (i.e. G-spot, A-spot, PS-spot, anus, nipples, etc.)

Step 9:

Repeat Step 8 until she has an orgasm. If you feel the need, increase the rate of flicks/kisses from 2/sec to 3-4. Don’t worry about numbers; the important thing is the increase in speed.

SIDENOTE: Going fast isn’t the same as increasing her pleasure. Correct rhythm creates the correct speed which determines the amount of pleasurable sensations she gets. If you sacrifice rhythm for an increase in speed, her arousal usually suffers. Pay attention to whether or not an increase in speed actually causes her to respond with an increase in arousal (i.e. her breathing/movements/sounds become more powerful)

Your mission is control the amount of pleasure she receives at any given time while mixing different types of pleasurable stimulations, not focusing on her orgasm.  It’s better to get good at a new skill first before trying to get results with that skill.  Don’t sidetrack yourself by trying your old standby that you KNOW will make her orgasm.  Focus on learning the execution of the technique’s mechanisms.

More importantly, enjoy the process.  If all this confuses you, skip it for now.  Things that come naturally to me might not to you and vice versa.  I enjoyed writing this, and I did my best to explain my intuitive knowledge which isn’t easy for me to do.

It’s critical you connect with her on a strong emotional level. If you simply commit to taking the time to learn her at deeper and wider levels than you have in the past, you will easily become her best lover ever while becoming a master at providing powerful pleasure. 

The Half Crescendo Technique

(Adopted from CRJ)

The Shower of Kisses technique is designed to help you master controlling her pleasure by transitioning between two different types of stimulation.  A subtle stimulation and a more direct, intense stimulation.  Together, along with the transition between them, they create a pleasure gradient.

This technique is about speed and other subtleties

Step 1:

After she is thoroughly warmed up, warm up her vulva with upward licks on the entire area except her clitoral glans.

Then, perform 10-20 very slow reps of upward and downward licks. As you progress, lick closer and closer to the head of her clitoris. Each rep will last no less than 5 seconds. One rep is equivalent to 1 upward and 1 downward lick, similar to a pushup. The last rep should be on her clitoral hood or glans.

Sidenote:

If you are in the right groove…

1] She’s experiencing just enough pleasure to put her into a mental sexual trance and

2] She’ll be craving more.  She slow licks will cause her to crave more speed which her mind is now associating with more pleasure. 

See why slow in the beginning is dangerously effective?  It allows your speed later on to be more effective because of the mental setup and the fact that her clitoris is fully engorged and ready to handle more speed. The two reasons above are important because if you make the process too long it will actually decrease her arousal. E.g. getting paid $20/hour versus $20/week.

Step 2:

Continue the same licking pattern above except slightly increase your speed (i.e. 1 rep / 4 sec) for 10 – 20 reps

This exercises utilizes 7 different licking speeds (gears)

1st gear = 1 rep / 5 sec

2nd gear = 1 rep / 4 sec

3rd gear = 1 rep / 3 sec

4th gear = 1 rep / 2 sec

5th gear = 1 rep / 1 sec

6th gear = 1 rep / ½ sec

7th gear = 1 rep / ¼ sec

Understand? 

Don’t get too caught up in the speeds, what’s important is that each “Gear” is faster than the last.  Practice this now. Great fighters shadowbox, great cunnilinguists shadowlick!

As you guessed…

Step 3: 3rd gear for 10 – 20 reps

Step 4: 4th gear for 10 – 20 reps

Step 5: 5th gear for 10 – 20 reps

Step 6: 6th gear for 10 – 20 reps

Step 7: 7th gear for 10 – 20 reps

Step 8: 8th gear for 10 – 20 reps (as fast as possible)

Step 9: Pause for 1 – 3 minutes to kiss her inner thighs, caress her nipples/breasts, etc

Step 10: Repeat gears 1-8

Step 11: Cycle between 9 and 10 until she has an orgasm

The Full Crescendo Technique

(Adopted from CRJ)

This is similar to the Half Crescendo. The difference lies in execution of the gears.

The Full Crescendo sequence:

Step 1: Gears 1 – 8

Step 2: Gears 8 – 1

Step 3: Gears 1 – 8

This is done to figure out whether she likes:

       Upshifting (increase in tongue speed)

       Downshifting (decrease in tongue speed)

       Equal Shifting (neutral to speed changes)

This technique also helps you figure out whether she likes a particular “gear” OR all the buildup that led to that “gear”.  I saved the best two techniques for last, I hope you enjoy them as much as I have.

Grand Finale #1

Using Oral Sex to Trigger Vaginal Orgasms During Intercourse

The Basics

Never mention the word “orgasm” to her at all when you begin stimulating any of these spots.  The mind is a powerful tool.  She has the ability to block an orgasm from happening simply by believing it is not possible.

Locating Her Vaginal Hot Spots

G-spot:  ~1 -2 inches inside the vagina (about two knuckles in).  Feels a bit rougher than the surrounding tissue.  Kind of like a soggy walnut or chewed piece of gum.  Has slight ridges/bumps.

A-spot: Further along the front wall of her vagina than the G-spot. Just above the cervix, at the deepest portion of her vagina where the anterior wall begins to curve upward.  Also known as the “deep spot” or anterior fornix erogenous zone (AFE).

Desmond Morris about the A-spot location: “The cervix of the uterus is the narrow part that protrudes slightly into the vagina, leaving a circular recess around itself. The front part of this recess is called the anterior fornix. Pressure on it produces rapid lubrication of the vagina, even in women who are not normally sexually responsive.”

Stimulation (Before or During Oral Sex)

       Both are most sensitive to pressure and pressure variation

       Ways to stimulate the spots:

o        Tapping (Fast & rhythmic or slow & firm seem to work best)

o        A firm “come hither” motion

o        Side-to-side sweeping motions

o        Circles

       Vary your speed & pressure to see what she responds to best (depends on where her arousal is)

The G-spot’s Preferred Stimulation:  putting your fingers behind it and “pulling” it forward with pressure.  Almost as if you were trying to make it protrude outside the vaginal entrance. You can allow your finger(s) to pass over the spot as you are pulling or you can anchor your finger behind the spot and pull it forward.

The A-spot’s Preferred Stimulation: Use your middle finger, to apply pressure to the area while making a “come hither” motion. Try to make small, firm movements with the tip of your finger as if you were smudging graphite on paper.  Responds to the “pulling” motion as well.

You must calibrate the pressure you use to her arousal level.  Work your way up to massaging the spot firmly. As a general guideline, the more turned on she is, the firmer your stimulation/pressure can be. Always start off with slow pressure and add more if her arousal is increasing.

Crucial: while massaging these spots, tell her how beautiful she is and how sexy her body looks. Also tell her how amazing it feels when she lets go for you.  Give her strong eye contact as you say this to her.  DO NOT skip this.  It will open her up psychologically and allows her to relax into the sensations.

The Actual Technique

Basic Idea: Giving her oral sex with your while you slowly massage vaginal hot spots with your fingers

I recommend this after you’ve given her a clitoral orgasm (with your fingers or your tongue).  Make the orgasm a nice slow one, build it up so she is juicy and engorged. 

Step 1: The Exploratory Tongue

Begin oral a la the Cunnilingus 101 Basic Step by Step Guide.  Except, when you start focusing on her clit, lick a specific quadrant or area.  If you imagine a clock face on her clit, focus your licks in the 12 to 3 o’ clock areas.  Pay attention to which area of this section she likes the most.  Most likely it will be the 1-2 o’ clock area.  Focus the majority of your licks there.  Insert pauses so the area doesn’t succumb to a dulling of sensation.

Yes, I’m aware that you’re working with a tiny area here…well, step your game up. Give her slow, well not necessary slow, I guess I should say well placed licks.  Make your licks have a purpose.  No flimsy, haphazard licks.

Make each one specific.

Explore that area of her clitoris. Pretend you are searching for something in that area.  Vary your licks until she’s at a higher stage of arousal if necessary.  You don’t want her arousal waning. 

Slow, purposeful licks tend to make her arousal soar and allow her to feel the full amount that each sensation has to offer, especially during the vaginal massage.

Lick her with light feathery strokes and firm pressure strokes.  Lick the 1 o’ clock spot as if her clit had a tiny itch there and your tongue is trying to scratch it. Use very small licks with the tip of your tongue.

Step 2: The “Vaginal Clock” Massage Spots

The clock is back!  With her G-spot being 12 o’ clock this time and her bottom vaginal wall being 6 and so forth.

Key Points:

1) Use a “taking touch” when you massage each of these areas.  Make sure it feels good to your finger(s) as well.

2) The key is to start with lighter pressure at each “hour” and notice which areas she responds to and what her favorites are.  The areas to pay attention to are 3, 6, 9 and 12 o’ clock. 

3) Move your finger in a “come hither” motion or move it like a caterpillar.

4) Each area has a superficial part (the area closest to her vaginal opening) and a deeper part (closer to her cervix).  Be sure to massage each.

5) Maintain clitoral stimulation throughout the massage, in the manner described above.  Massage each spot until you sense her arousal decreasing (listen to her breath and watch her movement) and then move on to the next.

6) Focus mainly on massaging the vaginal spots, don’ t worry about clitoral stimulation too much until she nears orgasm.  Just keep a basic clitoral rhythm going with your tongue in the 12 – 3 o’ clock area.

Insert a single finger and begin stroking her 3 o’ clock area.  Start rhythmically moving your finger and massage the area.  Remember to massage the superficial and the deeper areas of each “hour.”

Repeat for hours 6 and 9.

When you get to 12 o’clock, focus on massaging her G-spot and then switching to her A-spot.  Try to make the transition between the spots smooth, so she can’t tell switch spot you are stimulating.

In fact, near the end, massage the entire area in long strokes.  Stroke her in a firm “come hither” manner from her A-spot to her G-spot and then the reverse.  Begin to create a rhythm if you haven’t already with your tongue and bring her to orgasm while “milking” her with these long strokes on all along her anterior vaginal wall.

Summary:

This massage, performed often can give a woman wonderful sensations and often, orgasms.  Giving her orgasms by stimulating her vagina and her clitoris simultaneously awakens vaginal sensations that carry over into intercourse.  Regular massage of her favorite spots AND her G- & A-spots during oral sex will make it much easier for her to orgasm during intercourse. 

Repeat this massage often during your oral sessions and attempt to massage every millimeter of her vagina over time. The bread and butter of this massage are going to be her G-spot and A-spot. Focus your attention there and massage the area well, making sure you spread your strokes to areas around the spot also. 

Bonus Tip:

I’ve noticed that women seem to love it when you lick them to orgasm and then quickly slide inside and start having sex while they are still hot from that oral orgasm.  It feels great…or so I’m told.

Troubleshooting

1) She Feels Like She Has To Pee

The sensation is normal and a sign that she might ejaculate.  Reassure her that this is normal, and to let go anyway.  Tell her to push out whenever she has that feeling.  When a woman is about to ejaculate (or you are stimulating her urethra) pressure builds up and she feels the sensation of having to pee.

Remind her that it’s OK to let go, and that you have plenty of towels to put down if necessary so she has nothing to worry about.  Tell her to breathe through the feeling, to trust her body, and relax into it. 

Tell her if she ends up peeing (very unlikely) that it doesn’t matter, and that you’re going to judge her…and that you just to enjoy her and give her pleasure.  Tell her that she can release whatever she needs to, she has full permission.

If the session hasn’t happened yet, tell her to go pee before you start.

2) She Doesn’t Feel Anything, She Says It Feels Weird, or She Says It Hurts

Sometimes there can be a lack of sensation or discomfort.

She has to be very relaxed and extremely aroused before you attempt to stimulate either spot.  If she’s never experienced stimulation of these spots, she may be unsure of how to interpret the sensations.  Your words and body language are crucial during this time to lead her to interpret it pleasurably.

To repeat what I said earlier:  while massaging these spots, tell her how beautiful she is and how sexy her body looks. Also tell her how amazing it feels when she lets go for you.  Give her strong eye contact as you say this to her.  DO NOT skip this.  It will open her up.

There can be emotional release from stimulating these areas.  Some women cry, or even laugh.  I had a woman cry for about 10-20 minutes in my arms after one of these massages.  Twas one of the coolest moments of my life.

Breathe and go with it my man. Orgasm may not happen the first time or even second or third time you stimulate them.  But the key is to lead her into relaxation and never take her too far outside her comfort zone.  Do a little bit at a time.  Lead with her pace and pleasure in mind.

You must be paying attention here, because you need to use a scale of pressure and see how she responds.  If it starts to become too uncomfortable for her, you need to back off before she does.  This lets her know that you are paying attention to her physical and emotional wellbeing. 

This will let her relax with you even more.

It may take a number of sessions before the pain/discomfort goes away, but you want to be absolutely sure it’s not your pressure or your finger in a weird position.  Communicate and check in with her.  Ask her to continue and do it with you a few more times and if anything hasn’t happen by then that you’ll give it a rest. 

Usually once she has an emotional release from the massage, the area becomes more pleasurable than before.

Get her to interpret the sensations as pleasure by combining stimulation of the spot with clitoral stimulation.  This is especially important if the G- or A-spot stimulation feels strange to her. Begin stimulating the clit first and then begin stimulating the G- or A-spot.

To enter deep states of orgasm a woman has to totally let go and fully surrender to the pleasure.  She has to learn how to trust her body’s wisdom and flow with it.

3) When All Else Fails?

Sometimes it can be hard for women to let go, even with a partner they’ve known for years because of religious/societal beliefs she has.  She’s stuck in the “prim and proper lady” mindset and not that of the “wild woman” mindset.

If this happens to be the case, it’s up to you to lead her into her wild feminine.  Tell her how beautiful and sexy she looks when she comes, and how it makes you feel.  Let her know how amazing you feel when you see her really let go like that.

For an even greater effect, tell this to her as she is coming.  Tell her to come harder for you and how much it turns you on.  Tell her to let it all out, to let go.  Keep repeating these things to her as she comes.  She needs you to lead and to feel your sexual assertion.  It is an anchor of safety, she will then know that she can FULLY lose all control and that you will be right there…able to handle anything that arises.

Lastly:  She needs to KNOW and FEEL that you have her best interests in mind and not just the goal of orgasm.  Does she trust you with her sexuality? If she does, she’ll let you continue the massages even if there is some discomfort because you’ll have her needs in mind and will stop/slow stimulation during the right moment. 

Have patience.

Grand Finale #2

The Ladykiller Technique

This technique is so deadly simple, BUT it only works for assertive men with sexual confidence.

Step 1:

After she’s thoroughly warmed up, perform oral on her (using some of the new skills you have learned)

Step 2:

When she’s on the verge of having an orgasm, stop and tell her she isn’t allowed to come yet.  Bring her to the edge of orgasm about 5 – 10 more times.  Each time you “peak” her, say a “Do not come yet” type of message to her.

These words generate a huge amount of tension and this is irrespective of stopping her when she’s on the edge.  These two combined will have her pouting in deliciously agonizing pleasure.

More Examples of Edging Commands:

       Don’t you come yet

       Not yet. Hold it for me baby.

       Keep feeling the intense pleasure, but don’t come yet.

       You aren’t allowed to come yet

       You can come when I tell you to

       Don’t come yet or I’ll stop

Step 3:

The magic begins here. She will explode.  Add G-spot or A-spot stimulation and she might black out or squirt.  You have been warned, prepare yourself accordingly.

After the 5th or 10th time (or whatever “stop number” you chose), pause and give her the command to orgasm.  These are her “Come on Command” messages. It is important you say them with absolute conviction. Any ounce of doubt effectively kills the technique.  Don’t use it if you even doubt yourself a tiny amount.

Come on Command Explosion Message Examples:

       Come hard for me baby, right now

       Come for me, come as hard as you can

       I want you to come very hard [name]

       Come. Come harder, even harder baby

       Come now

       Come harder than you ever came before. Right now!

       If I let you come, you going to come harder than you’ve ever come right? [She responds] COME NOW!

       I want you to come 10x harder than you ever came before. Let it go. Come for it

       Let it go, come for me. Come for me baby, come harder!

Just saying these words will affect the intensity of her orgasms. Don’t overuse this technique, Save it for once every 5-10 session or so. It retains its potency that way. If she doesn’t come just from your voice alone, give her the command once more before going back to the exact same rhythm, speed, and pressure with your tongue.

***

Conclusion

She will start CRAVING you. 

She will daydream about how you caressed, licked, and stroked her with a succulent and deft tongue. 

She now recalls the sensations, how you made her feel…the entire experience.

She opens to you and reveals her deepest heart...she connects you to her deepest sexual desires and fantasies.   Soon, nothing will replace YOU, alternatives look dull and boring…her masturbation starts to frustrate her. 

Nothing will work; the alternatives just leave her frustrated and longing for more.

She doesn’t have the same powerful orgasms and feelings like when she is with you.  She needs you to give her release.

Your whole relationship changes, the way you relate to each other…changes. You will become addicted to her as well.  Her femininity will pull you in. 

Savor her, and always remember…

The Best Oral Sex Is Enthusiastic, Attentive And Unrequested!

===========

[===Other Titles by The Author===]

Orgasmic Dirty Talk: How to Talk Dirty & Supercharge Her Orgasms

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-The 4 Dirty Talk Languages

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-How to Repeat Yourself So That It Increases Her Arousal

  (Repeating yourself is actually helpful if properly done)

-How You Can Structure Your Dirty Talk For Specific Purposes

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===========

Cunnilingus 101: How To Eat Pussy and Give Her Multiple Mind-Blowing Orgasms Using Unusual Oral Sex Techniques

Let’s be real here, not being able to give your lady the pleasure and orgasms she craves, hurts.

Each time you wonder whether or not you satisfied her...something inside causes you to question and doubt yourself. You feel like a shell of a man, maybe even stress about your performance or think she might leave you.

Once the sex goes, it’s only a matter of time before the entire relationship crumbles. This book is written for men who want to know step-by-step how to give a woman exquisite oral pleasure with a deft tongue. 

Do you know the right way to place your first lick? The first lick sets the tone for the entire session due to a psychological principle called the "Primacy effect"

So what will you learn in this eBook?

What's In It For You:

-- The 11 Cunnilingus Principles for Powerful Orgasms
-- 2 Easy Ways to Supercharge Her Orgasms
-- Know Exactly How She Wants to Be Licked WITHOUT Asking Her!
-- 12 Tongue Tricks to Blow Her Mind
-- 3 Most Comfortable Oral Sex Positions for Powerful Orgasms
-- 2 Weird Ways to Use Food to Improve Your Oral Sex Skills
-- How to Give An Unforgettable First Lick That Makes Her Swoon in Delight

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***

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If you’d like free updates to this eBook and other advanced tips now that you’ve graduated to Master Cunnilinguist, send a blank email to

OralSeduction2@aweber.com

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